I Can't Lose You Again - Part Two

I Can't Lose You Again - Part Two

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You felt numb as you sunk down, letting your head rest against your knees as your eyes fell shut. The harsh reminder that he wasn’t your Loki, no matter how much you wished he was, stung. Your Loki wouldn’t have ever left you here, especially not with these people.

“Just grab her and let’s go!” You heard somebody snap. You didn’t see Mobius shake his head, glaring as he dismissed the hunter.

A few moments later Mobius knelt down in front of you but stayed silent. He felt sorry for you, he really did. Watching all those months you stayed silent, stayed loyal to Loki’s you didn’t even know just because of the man you knew...he really did sympathise with you.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered before he could say anything.

“Why are you sorry?” Mobius asked, honestly confused. If anything it should’ve been him apologising, he never should’ve taken Loki to you, there was a reason he hadn’t met you in 2012.

“I told you you could trust him.” Was your broken reply. As you looked up at him, Mobius’ frown deepened as he saw the tears in your eyes.

“This isn’t on you.” Mobius told you firmly, “He isn’t the man you know yet, he’s still struggling for control and trying to find his way.” The Loki you knew had years of character development, this Loki, well this Loki hadn’t had a chance yet.

This Loki, for all intents and purposes, was a villain.

“He’s just trying to help.” You told Mobius. You did believe that, you had too, the look on Loki’s face as he had mere seconds to figure out his next move was clear. If he waited for you then he risked Mobius stopping him and then he wouldn’t find out the Variants plan. Logically you knew Loki had made the right move but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

“I know.” Mobius replied honestly. He knew that Loki had grown to care for you, probably more than he wanted to admit, but he wasn’t sure how to deal with that yet. “C’mon we have to go, we’ll figure something out.” Mobius assured you as he stood up holding a hand out for you.

Despite the situation he couldn’t help but smile as you took the offered hand without flinching.

-

When you walked through the doorway and into the TVA you were greeted with chaos. Which made sense when you thought about it, two Loki’s loose together...it was a recipe for disaster.

“Y/N, I need you back in the holding cell whilst this is dealt with.” Mobius said calmly as he turned to you.

“What?” You scoffed, “you’re just going to lock me up whilst Loki is out there with her?” You spat, you refused to sit idly by twiddling your thumbs whilst Loki could be in danger. He might’ve left you here but you’d be damned if you left him.

“I know, ok, I know you want to help but you're too close to this. If we bring you, we risk you running off with them too. I already lost one variant, I can’t lose another.” Mobius explained and whilst you understood his position you couldn’t just stay here.

Obviously there was no way to convince Mobius to let you come, naturally he was right of course, the first chance you got you’d go with Loki. It was never a hard decision when it came to what side to pick when it came to Loki. So instead you nodded.

“Fine, I’ll go sit in my cell.” You muttered before marching off in the direction of the holding cells.

Mobius watched you go with a frown, he wanted you to come, if anyone could talk Loki down it’d be you even if he didn’t know you too well yet but he couldn’t risk it. He knew he’d be in a world trouble as it was, losing you wasn’t an option.

“All Minutemen to armory. Protect the timeline.” Mobius shook his head as the voice repeated the message and quickly sent everyone on their way.

-

Tracking any Loki wasn’t hard, all you had to do was follow the trail of dead bodies. Unfortunately as the trail of bodies ended so did any signs of the Loki’s. Minutemen ran past you as you leaned against the wall, resting your head with a sigh.

“Where are you, Loki?” You whispered.

“Variant!” Somebody exclaimed and you looked up to see Judge Renslayer firing up her pruning device.

“Whoa, hey, I was just going back to my holding cell.” You told her carefully, raising your hands to surrender. You saw firsthand what those batons did to people, no way were you going to let yourself be struck by it.

“You’ve been protecting those Loki’s since we first arrested you.” She snarled, walking closer to you. You tried to move but she had you cornered.

Well shit.

“Listen…” You began but she cut you off.

“No you listen, you’ve been a pain since the beginning. All that loyalty to a man who couldn’t care less about you, I mean, he ran away the first chance he got.” You shook your head, trying not to let the words get to you.

“Yeah, I did, and I’d do it again and again.” You said whilst shooting her a cocky grin, probably not the best course of action but hey, she looked like she was going to kill you either way. “That Loki deserves somebody in his corner, his whole life living in the shadows, never good enough, so yeah I might not know this Loki and he might not know me but I’m going to protect every secret he has and if I die for that,” you said, pausing to chuckle before smiling proudly, “then I’ve done right by him and every other Loki Variant out there who had nobody on their side.”

“Pathetic.” She said before raising the baton. You looked her in the eyes, showed no fear as she came closer and closer to you, just as she was about to touch you-

“Y/N!” Mobius yelled, causing Renslayer to drop the device quickly and turn around just as Mobius rounded the corner. “What the hell?”

“Lost another Variant, Mobius?” Renslayer said as she roughly took a hold of your bicep, nails digging into the skin as she dragged you to Mobius all but throwing you into his arms.

“What happened?” Mobius asked, not dignifying the question with an answer.

“What do you think happened, Mobius?” She snapped, “they left, together, and because the theory of apocalypses was right I don’t know how we’re supposed to find them.”

“I’ll fix it.” Mobius promised before wrapping an arm around your shoulder and leading you away from the judge.

-

“Champagne?” The attendant asked, causing Loki and Sylvie to look up.

“Ah yes. Thank you very much.” Loki said as he grabbed the glass and drank from it, despite all the odds they were finally headed in the right direction. “To the end of the world.”

“A pity the old woman chose to die, don’t you think?” Loki asked.

“She was in love.” Sylvie answered simply.

“She hated him.” Loki shot back but Sylvie smiled at him.

“Maybe love is hate.” Loki quickly conjured up a quill and paper before jotting the quote down causing Sylvie to roll her eyes, unamused by the god across from her.

“Oh piss off.” Loki couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face, it was a strange feeling to be so free.

“So,” Loki began, “on the subject of love, is there a lucky beau waiting for you at the end of this crusade?”

“Yeah there is actually,” Sylvie said with a serious tone, “Managed to maintain quite a serious long-distance relationship with a postman whilst running across time from one apocalypse to another.”

“And with charm like that, who could resist you?” Loki chuckled.

“Well, people are quite willing in the face of certain doom.” Sylvie smiled.

“I'm sure they are.”

“It was only ever just to keep me going. How about you? You're a prince. Must've been would-be-princesses or perhaps, another prince.”

“A bit of both.” Loki admitted with a smile, “I suspect the same as you. But, nothing ever…” Loki trailed off.

“What is it?” Sylvie asked with a tilt of her head.

“All my life there was nothing ever really real, you know? But when the TVA arrested me I found a woman, a woman who remained loyal to a dead man and Variants of that dead man. A woman who let herself be tortured for however long just because she loves me. I haven’t met her yet, not properly, not how I’m supposed to but I believe what I have with her is, what I will have with her…it’s the most real thing in all the realms.” Loki confessed. He barely knew you but he couldn’t ignore the ache in his chest when he remembered the look on your face as he left you behind.

“Even now you’ve started falling for her, haven’t you?” Sylvie asked with a hint of a smile.

“I do believe I have but I ruined it. I left her there as I followed you.” Loki told her, looking down at his lap with a frown.

“Nah, if she put up with you until you died then I’m sure she’s had to deal with worse than this.” Sylvie told him and he couldn’t help but chuckle bitterly at that.

“I hope my future self treated her better than that but I suspect you’re probably right.”

-

Mobius took you to the control panel room, everyone had orders to look for anything out of the ordinary, any slight shift to indict the two Variants were together. You had been placed at one of the empty desks, a screen in front of you showing you the timeline.

“Please wait here whilst I talk to Ravonna.” Mobius told you and this time you just nodded, Loki was gone and you had no idea where. There was no point in running.

It had been hours since they’d gone and Mobius had spent most of that time giving orders out whilst biting his lip anxiously. You hadn’t spoken much or left his side, content to let him do the work so long as it resulted in you finding Loki

Mobius gave you a long look before leaving you alone, no doubt warning the hunters to keep an eye on you.

You sighed as you looked at the screen knowing how useless this was. The two Variants knew how to stay hidden, hide out in apocalypses and the TVA can’t find you, why they thought they could find them now was beyond you.

You didn’t know how much time had passed before Mobius was back and tapping your shoulder, gesturing for you to follow him.

“What did the judge say?” You asked when the two of you were alone.

“The time keepers are on our side but I can’t get access to C-20.” He told you. He wanted to tell you that the hunter was dead, he didn’t know why but it didn’t sit right with him. Instead he shook his head.

“Wait, why? She could know something important, she kept saying something was real.” You said, you had seen the woman yourself as the Minutemen hauled her off.

“She’s too far gone.” Was Mobius’ reply.

You didn’t reply but there were so many thoughts flying around your head and you could feel the start of a headache approaching.

Something about the TVA hadn’t seemed right when you were first brought it and it was explained to you and as every minute passed your doubt grew. The Hunter, C-20, was coherent when she was brought in, sure she was in shock but she was aware.

It didn’t make sense.

“So what happens now?” You asked Mobius watching as he collapsed into his chair.

“I don’t know.”

-

“I remember Asgard.” Sylvie confessed after moments of silence passed as Loki sat next to her, “Not much, but I remember. My home, my people, my life. The universe wants to break free, so it manifests chaos. Like me being born the Goddess of Mischief. And as soon as that created a big enough detour from the Sacred Timeline, the TVA showed up, erased my reality, and took me prisoner. I was just a child. I escaped. Stole a TemPad and I ran for a long, long time, which really sucked. Everywhere and every-when I went, it caused a nexus event.” Loki frowned as Sylvie continued her story. “Sent up a smoke flare. Because I'm not supposed to exist. Until, eventually, I figured out where to hide. And so that's where I grew up, the ends of a thousand worlds and now...that’s where I’ll die.”

Loki had no words, the two of them sat in silence staring ahead as everything fell to pieces around them.

“Not long now.” Sylvie said. “Do you think that what makes a Loki a Loki is the fact we’re destined to lose?” She asked in defeat.

“No.” Loki answered immediately, “We may lose, sometimes painfully, but we don’t die. We survive. I mean, you did. You were just a child when the TVA took you, but you nearly took down the organization that claims to govern the order of time. You did it on your own. You ran rings around them. You're amazing!” Loki praised, smiling as Sylvie smiled.

Loki reached out and took her hand in his.

-

It wasn’t long before you were back in the control room, looking at a bunch of monitors that had yet to change.

“Alarms should be going off for the magnified nexus threshold if somebody steps on the wrong leaf.” Mobius said as the two of you joined Hunter B-15.

“Wherever they are I’m not sure anything survives.” Was her reply causing your eyes widened, your hand reaching out to grip Mobius’.

Mobius looked at you in concern, seeing the tears in your eyes and the hold on his hand was tight but you didn’t look away from the screen, it was like you thought you could will it into changing if you stared at it hard enough.

“Yeah, don't underestimate them.” Mobius said, watching as you let out a mix of a sob and a laugh.

He turned to Hunter B-15, whispering quietly, “You see anything down at Roxxcart?”

“They’re gone.” She answered, “Leaping across time, plotting their next massacre.”

“We got something.” One of the analysts said breaking the silence and you all looked at the screen he was at.

Mobius laughed, “That’s not someone stepping on the wrong leaf. You ever seen a branch like that?”

“No.” Hunter B-15 answered as they got a lock on the location and it wasn’t long before a team of hunters were ready as Loki and Sylvie stepped through the two orange doorways.

“Y/N.” Mobius warned just before they came through, “go to the holding cell, wait for me there.”

“You’re kidding right-” You began but he interrupted you.

“Y/N!” He yelled before looking to one of the hunters, “take her.”

“Mobius!” You yelled, struggling against the man holding you. Unfortunately it was no use and before you knew it you were being tossed into the holding cell.

“Fuck!” You yelled as you picked yourself up off the floor, kicking one of the chairs as you did.

It was useless to try the door, you knew it was, but it didn’t stop you from walking over and slamming your fists against the metal repeatedly, not stopping even after your knuckles started to bleed.

-

“Loki.” Loki’s head snapped away from where the doorway had just disappeared to see you stood in a different doorway.

You looked so pretty, your hair was braided as you wore clothes that were definitely from Asgard.

“Y/N, thank goodness you're here.” He said, his face lighting up as you stepped closer to him.

“You really believed I could fall in love with you, didn’t you?” You asked him, letting out a dark laugh as you did.

“Y/N, what have they done to you?” He asked, taking a step towards you only to stop as you slapped him.

“Who could ever love you? You’re nothing but a coward, murdering innocent people to feel powerful, you’re a villain, Loki, you’re always going to be a villain.” You snarled.

This wasn’t you, Loki knew that much.

“Oh a time cell? Using Y/N against me, very clever, except I have no memories with her so you’re making your own up. Well guess what? I won’t fall for it, I know her and this won’t work on me.” Loki yelled at the ceiling. He didn’t know if anyone was watching him but it felt good to shout a bit.

“You hear me? I promise you, I promise everyone working for the TVA will suffer for ever hurting her, for dragging her into this, you’ll suffer.” He promised, fist clenched at his side.

“Always hurting people, you really are a villain.” You said, drawing his attention back to you.

“This isn’t real, Y/N, snap out of it.” Loki pleaded but you just shouldered your way past him and left.

“Well then…” He said, looking around, wondering where to go from here.

It was silent for a few moments before he heard your voice again.

“Loki.” His head snapped up to you. “You really believed I could fall in love with you, didn’t you?”

“Oh god, come on, not a time loop.” Loki groaned, watching as you stepped forward and slapped him.

“Ow, come on, seriously? This is the TVA’s grand punishment?” He asked.

“Who could ever love you? You’re nothing but a coward, murdering innocent people to feel powerful, you’re a villain, Loki, you’re always going to be a villain.” You snarled again. “Always hurting people, you really are a villain.” You repeated.

Loki didn’t know how many times he had heard you repeat the same speech and as much as he hated to admit it, it really was starting to get to him.

“Loki.” You said, causing Loki to sigh.

“Please Y/N, no more, I beg you. I know, I know I’m a horrible person, I know, I get it. I hurt people and I use people because it’s...well you already know why I do it don’t you?” he chuckled though there was no humour in it, “I crave attention. I know I was raised as a prince, I know I shouldn't complain but living in the shadow of Thor with a father who didn’t care for you…” He trailed off not knowing where to go from there.

“I’m afraid of being alone.” He finally admitted.

“You are alone and you always will be.” You said before disappearing through the doorway.

Loki sat down on the stairs with watery eyes, waiting for you to make your entrance.

“Okay, Loki.” Mobius' voice made him look up, raising his eyebrows at the man, “ready to talk?”

Mobius took Loki back into the interrogation room but the conversation that followed got neither of the men anywhere and it wasn’t long before Mobius ended the conversation.

“Give my regards to Y/N.” He said as the doorway appeared.

“What...No. What? No, no, no. Please, not...well, just wait, wait, wait.” Loki pleaded, not ready to go back into that room, not ready to hear those words from you again.

“Of course it was me pulling the strings all along. She came to me on Asgard a long time ago and then she took me to one of her apocalypses and that's where we hatched our plan together.” Loki lied easily.

“Which is?” Mobius asked.

“Coming along very nicely, thank you.” Loki snarked.

“What of the Variant?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Loki said, lying naturally, “she’s nothing more than a pawn and when she’s finished being useful to me, I’ll dispose of her.”

“Oh she’s already been pruned, you can thank Hunter B-15 for that.” Mobius said casually. “So assume I do set you free…”

“Hang on, what did you just say?” Loki interrupted.

“What? Assume I do set you free.” Mobius repeated, suppressing a smirk.

“No, the variant, she’s gone?”

“Yeah, she took out two of ours, B-15 pruned her.

Loki shrugged, trying not to let his eyes water. “Good riddance.” He forced out.

At that, Mobius couldn’t hold back his chuckle any longer.

“What’s so funny?” Loki snapped, his emotions bubbling at the surface.

“Oh come on, look at your eyes. No wonder you have no clue what caused the nexus event.” Mobius chuckled, of course Loki would be oblivious to a connection like that. It may not have been romantic but it was strong, possibly stronger than a romantic connection.

“The two of you, pure chaos. That’s enough to break reality.” Mobius said.

“You finally trusted yourself, you saw the good in yourself. You fell for yourself.” Mobius couldn’t help but smile.

“Her name was Sylvie.” Loki said through gritted teeth.

“Ah, Sylvie, lovely. Is that I-E or just an I?” Mobius grinned.

“Is she alive?” Loki demanded.

“For now.” Was the reply.

“Mobius, listen to me carefully, if what Sylvie has told me about this place is true, it affects us all.” Loki said, cursing as Mobius rolled his eyes.

“Loki, you’ve already told me about fifty lies in the past ten minutes and now I’m supposed to believe you and Sylvie.” He chucked.

“You’re all Variants!” Loki shouted, cutting Mobius off. “Everyone who works at the TVA. The timekeepers, they didn’t create you, they stole you from your timeline and erased your memories. She has access to these memories through enchantment. So before this, before you were an analyst for the TVA, you had a past, you could have had a family, Mobius, a life.” Loki pleaded with the man, begging him to believe him.

For a moment there was nothing but silence and Loki almost thought that Mobius was going to believe him.

“Nice try but this case is closed. Our interests are no longer aligned as you’d say. I have no need for you, your variant or your girlfriend.” Mobius said, tone harsh.

“What of Y/N?” He asked, glaring at the man opposite him.

“Oh, Y/N is no longer a concern. For your or us.” Mobius said, watching the dangerous glint in Loki’s eyes.

“Leave her out of this.” Loki demanded as he stood up but Mobius just rolled his eyes as two hunters came into the room and took him back into the time cell.

Mobius sat there longer than he intended too, thinking of Loki’s words.

-

“Y/N.” A voice said from the doorway and your head shot up. There was the Hunter B-15. “You have to come with me, now.”

You did as she said, following her out of the room in confusion.

“What’s going on?” You asked but she shook her head.

“No time to explain and even if there was it isn’t safe enough to do so but let’s just say you were right to trust the Loki’s.” She said as the two of you continued on down the hall. “They’re going to need us.”

The two of you entered the armoury and she held out a dagger towards you.

“I’m just assuming you know how to use this.” She said, watching you smile as you gently took it from her.

“I had a good teacher.” You said fondly and she smiled back.

-

Mobius watched the footage on the stolen tempad and once he was done he quickly hurried back to the interrogation room and opened the doorway into the time cell Loki was being held in.

“Do you care about her?” Mobius asked urgently once he was in the room.

“Who?” Loki asked in confusion.

“Sylvie!” Mobius shot back.

“I’m not sure if care is the right word.” Was the reply he got but Mobius shook his head. “I’m sorry, haven’t we already covered this?”

“Shut up!” Mobius snapped. “Do you really think you deserve to be alone?” When he received no reply he snapped Loki’s name.

“What? You told me to shut up.”

“Do you believe you deserve to be alone?” He asked again.

“I don’t know,'' he admitted. He knew the nexus event was caused by a breakthrough between himself and Sylvie. He didn’t want to be with her obviously but did he think he deserved you? He really didn’t know.

“You better figure it out quick, because the nexus event the two of you caused, whatever that connection is, can bring this whole place down. So we better understand…” Mobius rushed out but Loki cut him off.

“We?” He asked.

“Do you swear she didn't implant those memories in Hunter C-20?”

“Mobius, no. I believe her.” Loki vouched.

“So, I just have to trust the word of two Lokis?” Loki debated the question for a few seconds.

“How about the word of a friend?” He smiled as Mobius nodded at him

“You were right, about the TVA.” He admitted, “You were right from the beginning. And if you wanna save them, Sylvie and Y/N, you need to trust me. Can we do that?” Mobius asked and Loki didn’t hesitate to agree.

The pair went to leave the room but Mobius stopped to turn around and face Loki, “You could be whoever, whatever you wanna be, even someone good. I mean, just in case anyone ever told you different.” Loki looked shocked at the words before a genuine smile took over his face and the two of them left the cell.

They quickly paused as they had an audience waiting for them as they stepped out, Judge Renslayer in the center.

“I think you have something of mine.” She said.

Mobius was quick on his feet and quickly withdrew the stolen tempad, “Oh yeah, I got all the way down there before I even noticed I picked the wrong one up. What’s the problem, Ravonna?” He asked, seeing the dark look on her face.

He knew what was about to happen, his friend of eons was about to rid of him like some common prisoner. He took a deep breath before talking again.

“You know where I'd go if I could go anywhere? Wherever it is I'm really from. Yeah, wherever I had a life before the TVA came along. Maybe I had a jet ski. That's what I'd like to do. Just riding around on my jet ski.”

Loki watched in horror, tears filling his eyes, as Renslayer had him pruned.

-

You and Hunter B-15 made your way down into the elevator together. There wasn’t much of a plan honestly but the two of you were going to bring down the TVA, whatever the risk.

“You ready?” She asked you and you grinned at her.

“As I’ll ever be.”

With those words the elevator dinged and the doors opened.

Before anyone had time to move Hunter B-15 had unlocked the collars around Loki and Slyvie’s necks and the other hunters readied their weapons.

“For all time,” Hunter B-15 said,

“Always.” You finished and with that the fighting began.

Hunter B-15 threw Sylvie the blade as you took down one of the hunters, quickly making your way to Loki who pulled you into a rough, desperate hug.

“Y/N.” He sighed, resting his cheek on your head.

“Nice to see you again.” You muttered against his chest.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to leave you, I just,” before he could continue you heard Sylvie shout,

“I hate to break up the reunion but we have a situation.” You smiled at Loki before you darted around him and began battling one of the hunters, Loki dealing with one in front of him.

“Here!” Sylvie yelled, throwing her dagger to Loki and picking up a baton. You watched her, from the corner of your eye, go to the judge. Just as you took down another hunter you saw Sylvie pinned down by Renslayer and moved quickly to kick her off before you were fighting somebody else, back to back with Loki.

“We make quite a team.” He tells you with a smile on his face.

“We really do.” You said fondly, remembering all the battles you’d fought together, knowing the others moves even before they did. You were a fierce duo.

It felt good to be fighting with Loki again.

Finally all the hunters were killed and Sylvie was quick to kill one timekeeper, the three of you watched her pick up his head seeing severed wires sparking.

“Fake?” You asked, staring down at the technology.

“Mindless androids.” Sylvie spat, looking at the remaining two.

“It never stops.” Loki said looking defeated. “Then who created the TVA?”

“I thought this was it.” Sylvie admitted, she too looked crushed, she had waited years and years for this moment and this was it.

You watched as Loki looked around clearly thinking of something, someway to get you all out of this.

“Sylvie.” He began but she quickly cut him off.

“Please not another pep talk.” She pleaded, causing you to laugh despite the situation.

“No, I have to tell you something. We’ll figure this out.” He said, moving to stand in front of her and he sounded so convinced you believed him.

“How do you know that?” She asked, clearly losing hope.

“Because, well, back on Lamentis.” He began but cut himself off, looking at you. You smiled at him encouragingly causing him to smile and take a deep breath, “This is new for me,”

“What, what is it?”

Before he could answer, his body started to disappear and in his place stood Renslayer holding the pruning device.

“No!” You yelled moving forward to attack her, you snatched the device from her hands, quickly moving and in seconds you had her pinned down with the device to her neck.

“Start talking.” You spat out, tears falling down your face.

________

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Finding Your Way Back (Part 1)

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Prompts -310 - “Every day she’s wondering why I’m not there!"

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You tried desperately to hold on to several thoughts, tried so hard not to let them stop running through your head. You had no idea how long you’d been gone for but it was long enough that you were barely functioning.

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger. I have magic.’

There used to be more thoughts, you were sure there used to be more thoughts but you couldn’t remember them anymore. You thought there might’ve been another name, another something, anything, but you didn’t know any more.

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger. I have magic.’

They had taken you so easily, strapped you down in a chair until you couldn’t remember who you were before. You used to have more thoughts but they were gone now.

Now you didn’t remember anything that happened, you couldn’t feel your own body, did you even have a body anymore? There used to be pain but now there wasn’t. Were you dead?

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger. I have magic.’

Sometimes you heard people, voices, cars, sounds, but you didn’t register them completely. Never knew exactly what you were hearing. You felt cold, so cold, a lot of the time but then sometimes you felt cool air, like you were outside but you couldn’t remember.

Why couldn’t you remember?

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger. I have magic.’

There used to be pain. Now there was nothing.

-

“Tell me you found something?” Bucky asked as he walked into Tony’s workshop. You’d been missing for four months, four months of Bucky trying to track you down but HYDRA had become smarter. There were less of them now that the Avengers had started taking them out but they were smarter now that they had you, you were their secret weapon.

The magic you held was powerful, more powerful than anyone should have access to. Forged by an infinity stone, the power should've killed you like it killed the hundreds before you but for some reason, one even the Sorcerer Supreme couldn’t even explain, the power had merged with you, making you one of the most powerful witches to walk the earth.

The abilities you had, well they were enough to bring the Earth to its knees. In the hands of HYDRA there was no telling what would happen.

Bucky knew you wouldn’t willingly follow their orders but he also knew how effective their methods were.

“She was spotted again.” Tony said, his voice heavy with sorrow. This was the seventh sighting of you, you looked worse and worse each time. By the time you were spotted you were gone before they could get to you.

It was like HYDRA was taunting them.

Wherever you were seen, shortly after a major disaster was reported, usually with dozens dead.

“You have to find her!” Bucky yelled, stalking towards Tony, effectively pinning him against the desk.

To Tony’s credit he didn’t flinch, he looked straight at Bucky with his head held high.

“I’m gonna find her, I promise you that much, I’m gonna bring her home.” Tony promised. He wouldn’t rest until you were safe.

“Every day she’s wondering why I’m not there!” Bucky tried to yell but his voice broke mid sentence as tears filled his eyes, he knew first hand how bad HYDRA could be, the thought of them hurting you-

“We’re gonna get her back, we won’t stop until we do.” Tony promised again, letting his hand rest on Bucky’s shoulder.

Bucky scrunched his eyes shut for a moment before nodding.

They were going to get you back.

-

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger.’

What was an Avenger? You couldn’t remember, you tried to, you tried so hard to remember but you couldn’t. The name didn’t mean anything to you anymore.

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am an Avenger.’

Days and weeks dragged without you knowing. You sat there, were you sitting?, motionless. Some days you longed for the pain, anything to tell you that you were alive but nothing came.

Nothing ever came.

-

‘My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N.’

That was your name, you were Y/F/N Y/L/N. You didn’t know anything else any more, couldn’t remember anything else. Everything felt empty, you tried to remember what came after that but you couldn’t.

-

‘My name is Y/F/N.’

How long had it been? Days, time, it had no meaning to you anymore. You didn’t know what you were or if you were even real. Nothing happened ever, nothing that you could see, nothing you could feel, nothing you could remember.

‘My name is…’

-

“Holy crap!” Tony exclaimed as he looked at the data in front of him.

It had been seven months since your disappearance and not a day went by where Tony wasn’t looking for you. By now he had a long, long list of HYDRA bases, some abandoned, some active, but none ever held you.

He and JARVIS had been looking through the new data when they saw you. Your face was partially covered but the camera was at just the right angle.

It was definitely you.

Tony was quick to make his way up to where the jet was always on standby for such an occasion, he had already told everyone to suit up and meet him there.

“You found her?” Bucky asked as soon as Tony came into view.

“I found her.” Tony said, relief flooding his system. He knew it wasn’t going to be any easier, getting you out and dealing with the aftermath, but right now he just wanted to focus on the good news.

He was startled out of his thoughts when Bucky pulled him into a rough hug. The pair of them weren’t exactly friends but they got along just fine. Tony knew what Bucky was feeling though and hugged him back.

“Thank you.” Bucky whispered before pulling away and boarding the plane.

It took a good fews hours to get to where you were. In that time the team went over multiple different plans and ways to get you out. By the time they landed they had a fairly decent plan but still had no idea what they were walking into.

-

Outside your room sounds of guns and knives, metal and thunder could be heard by everyone except you.

You were oblivious to the absolute destruction that was happening in order to get you back. You had no idea that there were bodies piling higher and higher as the Avengers took down anyone who stood between you and them.

Bucky moved through the building as quickly and as quietly as he could. Though the trigger words were long gone, he had snapped back into the Winter Soldier faster than ever, using all his training against the people who created him.

He checked room after room, growling when he didn’t see you in any of them.

He had to stop, he had to think carefully. Bucky knew these monsters, he knew how they thought. If they knew there was even a slight chance somebody would come for their most powerful weapon, where would they hide her?

It took him less than thirty seconds to find an answer and then he threw stealth out the window as he ran down corridors, shouting through the comms for the team to meet up with him.

-

No thoughts ran through your head anymore.

You couldn’t remember who you were. You knew there used to be many things you were supposed to remember but you didn’t know anything anymore.

-

“She’s gonna be alright, Buck.” Steve said as he took a seat next to Bucky who was sitting at your side in the hospital.

“What if she’s not? Sure they think she’ll pull through physically but we’ve got no clue what they did to her head.” Bucky said. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, he felt defeated. Sure he had you back but what if he was too late, what if HYDRA had gone too far.

“It’s Y/N.” Steve said like that explained everything. “She’s a fighter.”

Bucky had nothing to say. Whilst it was true and you were one of the strongest people he knew, he also knew you were just a human. Sure the infinity stone had given you powers but ultimately you were still a human and there was only so much damage the human mind could take.

“She’ll pull through,” Steve said as he stood to leave, “She always does.”

-

It had taken a month and a half for your body to fully recover. In that time you were moved from the hospital and into the compound’s medical wing. Bucky had yet to leave your side for longer than a shower and forced meals that he swore he didn’t need. Any time away from you wasn’t worth it.

In the space of that month you had opened your eyes and twitched your fingers a few times but other than that made no move to wake up.

As the days went by the hope lessened significantly. Bucky spoke with you everyday, he begged and pleaded with you to just wake up, just let him know you were going to be ok. When he left your side to shower he cried, he punched the walls and broke most of the bathroom whilst cursing the world.

He’d apologised to Tony but the man shrugged it off, telling him to get back to his girl. The whole team was dealing with it pretty badly, most days the weather was terrible with thunder spreading right across New York.

“Please wake up, doll.” Bucky whispered, his voice cracking as he took your hand in his. “C’mon, doll you can do it.”

-

‘Doll.’

That wasn’t your name, at least you didn’t think it was your name.

A flicker of a memory, so faint you could barely recall it but you managed.

‘Doll.’

He called you that, the man with the metal arm. He called you doll but it wasn’t your name.

Who was he? You knew him somehow but you couldn’t remember. Why was he here? Was he one of the people who hurt you?

‘Just show me you're awake, ok? Just squeeze my hand if you can hear me, baby.’

Squeeze your hand, how? Did you have a body? You couldn’t feel it.

‘Just a little squeeze, c’mon baby, for me.’

It was the man with the metal arm. Nobody else called you baby or doll. At least you didn’t think so, it was hard to remember. The memories, they were so far away.

He sounded sad.

Your hand. He wanted you to move your hand. Where was it again?

Focus.

It took a long time but eventually you squeezed your hand, once, twice, three times.

‘Y/N, can you hear me?!”

Y/N!

That was your name, your name was Y/F/N….

You thought there was more, there should’ve been more but you couldn’t remember the next bit.

Instead you squeezed your hand again.

-

Bucky let out a slightly hysterical laugh as he looked down at you.

“Good job baby, that’s it. You’re doing great.” He praised as he looked at your hand like it was the best thing to grace the Earth. “So good.”

Doctors came swarming in when they were altered via JARVIS about the changes, chattering about how this was a good sign and where to go from here.

Bucky watched them from the doorway, a huge grin on his face.

He didn't doubted your strength but he also couldn’t deny HYDRA’s methods. They were enough to make anyone lose their mind but here you were finding your way back. It was going to be a long, exhausting road but you were finding your way back.

Read part two here.

I Can't Lose You Again (Part One)

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Requested - Yes - Anon - Loki x reader where the reader is being held prisoner at the TVA because she knows Loki better than anyone else - the rest is up to you. Thank you!!!

“Who was she?” Loki asked as the reel came to an end.

He had just witnessed his entire life play out before him, ending long before it should have and having accomplished nothing he thought he wanted. He recognised nearly everyone shown, his mother, father, the Avengers, Thor…but there was a woman that he had no recollection of, clearly not yet meeting her but important enough to his future self for her to be included.

“She was one of the few people who saw the good in you. One of the very few people who thought you could be more than the villain, who saw the potential in you.” Mobius said, causing him to screw his eyes shut and shake his head.

“As if there could ever be such a person.” Loki scoffed. He knew what he was, the film reel only highlighted that.

“Her name is Y/N. Thor brought her to Asgard during your time spent there as prisoner. She wandered down to your cell despite being told never to go by Odin. She was there for the battle, saw all the destruction and chaos but still she asked you for your side of the story.” Mobius said, pausing as Loki interrupted him.

“Why on Earth would she ask for my side of the story?” Loki asked bitterly, his eyes still wet with tears.

“That’s exactly what you asked her.” Mobius smiled, “You dismissed her, told her to leave but she didn’t listen. She stayed and sat with you in silence and continued to do so as the days went on, sometimes she brought books and read to you. Eventually you caved and told her your side of it. Somehow she decided that you weren’t all bad.”

“Then she is a fool.” Loki snarled, finally turning to face mobius.

“A fool,” Mobius chuckled fondly, “I don’t think so, I think once upon a time she was the villain and she was given a second chance. I think that made her kinder. Besides, she’s a fool you love more than anything, she’s a fool you lived for, a fool you would’ve died for without hesitation.”

Loki stayed silent for a few moments, processing the information. It seemed utterly impossible for anybody to love him, the thought of it was ridiculous. How could someone see good in him, he was the villain…he was always destined to be the villain.

“What happened to her?” Loki asked eventually.

“After Thanos was defeated and the Avengers brought everybody back, she hoped you’d be brought back too. When you weren’t, she was lost, broken. She had lost the one person who truly believed in her and she couldn’t deal with it. She used the time machine and went back to the moment before Thanos attacked you, she tried to warn you, she tried to change the future but that future couldn’t be changed.”

“What happened to her?” Loki asked again, this time more harshly, a dangerous edge to his tone.

“The TVA stepped in; she was to be pruned but then the decision was changed. We’ve been looking into you for a very long time, needing information and trust me when I say nobody knows a Loki better than Y/F/N Y/L/N.” Mobius said with a smile that Loki didn’t understand.

“She’s here?” He asked instead.

“She’s here.” Mobius confirmed.

“You dare to hold her here, for what? Because she knows me? Let her go.” Loki ordered, stepping close to Mobius who just chuckled in response.

“If it makes you feel better, she hasn’t given up any information about you. Refuses to speak to any of us, so they put her in a time cell hoping that’ll convince her to talk but I don’t think it’ll do any good. Even when she knows you’re dead, she’s still protecting you, consequences be damned.”

Loki thought she sounded foolish, to you he was dead, why wouldn’t you bargain for your own life? Give them information and make them let you go. A small part of him was pleased though, loyalty like that was almost impossible to come by.

That small part of him wanted to know you but he knew that was impossible.

Loki sighed, too quiet for Mobius to hear, before taking a seat on the step.

“I can’t go back, can I?” He asked, knowing the answer. He was never going to get to experience the things he’d seen. “Back to my timeline.”

Mobius looked at him, he really did sympathise with the God, watching how you had held up against the interrogations for him, well he must have been worth it.

In a moment of weakness, Loki confessed everything that only he knew…well things he hadn’t told you yet at least. He admitted that he didn’t enjoy hurting people, didn’t enjoy being the villain, admitted how weak he felt so conjured fear to feel powerful, he explained everything to Mobius, he explained the illusions, how he wanted to control.

“You do know yourself.” Mobius said, pleasure in his voice.

“A villain.” Loki admitted in defeat.

“That’s not how I see it.” Mobius said, watching as Loki looked down, not giving away what he felt about that statement. “That’s not how she saw it either.”

“I can’t offer you salvation,” Mobius told him, “but maybe I can offer you something better. Like I said we’re holding Y/N here because she knows Loki’s better than anybody.”

“What do you mean ‘Loki’s?” He asked, it hadn’t occurred to him that the plural had been used earlier either.

“A fugitive Variant’s been killing our Minutemen.“ Mobius told him, causing Loki to raise his eyebrows.

"And you need the God of Mischief to help you stop him?” He asked as he stepped closer to Mobius

“That’s right.” He nodded.

“Why me?”

“Because” Mobius began, “the Variant we’re hunting is you.” Loki’s eyebrows raised in confusion at this.

“I beg your pardon?” Loki said, they were hunting him?

-

Loki agreed to help and was quickly tasked with watching educational videos about the TVA, their policies and protocols but his mind kept wandering back to you. You were here somewhere, risking your life by withholding information. He admired you more than he wanted to admit and knew he had to meet you.

“Hey.” Mobius greeted as he walked up to his desk to see Loki sat with his feet up.

Before he could say anything else Loki spoke:

“I went to see her.”

It wasn’t a surprising statement to Mobius, in fact he’d been waiting for Loki to ask since he first heard about you. After the first outing with Loki to track the Variant down, he admitted he was growing fond of the God, so despite restrictions he nodded.

“I thought you might want to. Leave it to me, I’ll sort something out.”

-

You sat on the floor, eyes dry as you’d long ran out of tears.

It isn’t real.

You kept repeating the statement to yourself, not wanting to forget. It was so easy to forget that this wasn’t real. If you let yourself you could pretend Loki was alive, you could give in and lose yourself forever in this fake world they had conjured up for you.

Somehow you resisted, though as the days dragged on it was getting harder.

Every few minutes the scene would reset itself when you didn’t play your part.

Loki would stroll in through the door, calling out for you.

You remembered the moment they were playing for you, you were supposed to meet him at the door and he would bring you in for a soft kiss. He had had a long day at the Grandmaster’s side, playing his part so the two of you could escape.

It had been weeks since you had first arrived, breathing a sigh of relief when Loki stood in front of you. You were welcomed immediately once the Grandmaster found out you knew Loki and since then he had been working his way up in the man’s good graces.

After the two of you pulled away from each other you were supposed to go over to the sofa where Loki would wrap you up in his arms, tucking you in so your head rested under his chin. He’d place soft kisses on your forehead and let his fingers dance along your skin.

It was a moment of peace for the pair of you.

Then the scene diverged from how it should of continued, instead Loki told you how you were merely a pawn in his game, you had run your course and he no longer needed you, he told you how glad he was to be rid of you, how you were a villain just like him, he told you to stop playing the hero, reminded you of all the people you’d hurt, all the lives you ruined until you couldn’t take it anymore.

Right now, Loki was berating you, you wanted to cry, you wanted to scream and punch the walls and beg him to stop. You had done all of that in the early days and it made no difference, the scene always played on no matter how much you begged.

They said if you told them about Loki they’d let you go but you refused to talk. He might be dead but according to them there were other Loki’s out there and whilst none would ever come close to your Loki, you wouldn’t betray any of them.

You didn’t know how much time had passed, it could’ve been mere minutes or years, but the orange light appeared in the shape of a doorway and a man was stepping through.

Mobius.

You liked him. He was always nice to you even though you knew it frustrated him when you wouldn’t give any information up, he never hurt you like the others.

“Hello Y/N.” He said, his voice soft and smile friendly.

“Mobius.” You greeted, voice empty of emotion.

Mobius hated seeing you like this, he really did. He remembered you when they first brought in, so full of fight and spirit. Seeing you this broke didn’t sit right with him.

“C’mon.” He said, holding out a hand for you to grab, frowning when you flinched.

After an awkward pause you did take the offered hand and let Mobius take you through the doorway.

“No.” You said as you stepped out, turning to go back through the door but it was already closed.

“Y/N,” Mobius began, his voice changing to resemble that of how someone would talk to a frightened animal.

“No, not here, only in there,” you said, gesturing to the empty space where the door was only moments before. “He’s never here.”

“Y/N, this is Loki.” Mobius tried again but before he got the chance to give you an explanation, you exploded.

“My Loki is dead, Mobius!” You yelled pushing Mobius away, the fight you had thought long gone coming back stronger than ever, you felt the anger build inside of you, it felt like it was going to burn you alive. You hadn’t cried in a long time but the tears came pouring down rapidly now. “He’s dead, I watched him die! So don’t stand there and tell me he’s my Loki. Whatever kind of torture this is, it won’t work. You hear me, I hope the Loki your tracking finds you first, I hope he burns this place to the ground.” Despite the anger and the yelling, Mobius couldn’t help but smile as you echoed some of Loki’s first words to him.

“Y/N, is it?” Loki said, taking a hesitant step towards you.

You turned away from him, refusing to play whatever game Mobius had set up.

“I’m afraid I don’t quite know what to say, it feels like you know everything about me and I so little about you.” Loki confessed, he really was at a loss but seeing you so sad, so broken, so tortured…it pained him.

“You’re not my Loki.” You whispered harshly, though it sounded like you were trying to convince yourself rather than him.

“No, I’m afraid I’m not, for I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting you yet. Though I do envy my future self for having got so much time with you but perhaps it was better that way, I don’t think you would have liked this version of me as much.” Loki was shocked to find he believed the words wholeheartedly.

“You’re not my Loki.” Was your only reply.

“I know.” Loki repeated. “I am from your timeline though. I’m the Loki that just lost to the Avengers in New York.” Here he watched as you looked to Mobius, who gave you a sincere smile whilst nodding.

Then you turned to look at him.

“2012 Loki?” You asked, wiping at your eyes.

“Yes. I was captured and Thor was ready to take me to Asgard when the tesseract was released and I made my escape.” He watched as you played the information over in your head, matching it up with events you remembered.

“That’s when the TVA got you?” You asked, hesitant to believe it but Mobius was the only one who hadn’t lied to you yet.

“That’s when the TVA got me.” Loki confirmed, shooting you a small smile. “I heard they got you because you tried to save me.”

“Tried being the key word,” you scoffed, “I was so close, but they whisked me away and reset the timeline. I’ve been here ever since.”

“Staying loyal to a dead man?” Loki asked, causing you to smile.

“My Loki might be dead but there are other Loki’s out there, I refuse to betray any of them, especially one causing the TVA so much trouble.” You said, missing the way Mobius grinned.

“Your Loki must have meant an awful lot to you to inspire so much loyalty.”

“My Loki meant everything to me.” Was your reply.

There was a pause in the room and Mobius was quick to gesture to the chairs around the table. You hesitated for a moment which Loki noticed and he moved to pull a chair out for you. You couldn’t help but smile at him, the gesture was something you had become so used to, God you missed him.

“So, this Variant?” Loki asked, looking away from you to Mobius.

The three of you spent the next few hours going over the information the TVA had on the Variant and if Loki moved closer to you…well who could possibly blame him?

-

“Oh, my goodness. Don’t tell me the Variant ambushed and killed another team of Minutemen?” Here Loki paused to let out an exaggerated gasp causing you to laugh silently into the palm of your hand. “And stole their reset charge as well.” You couldn’t help but let out a snort of laughter causing Loki to grin widely before the two of you were shushed.

You both froze as you locked eyes with Loki, you raised your eyebrow at him causing him to smirk. Slowly he turned around to see the librarian and shushed her back.

You couldn’t have wiped the smile off of your face if you tried.

-

“Wait, I’ve got it!” Loki exclaimed after a long silence were the two of you continued reading the files Mobius had left.

“What?” You asked, looking up at him.

You watched as Loki scooped the folders up before reaching a hand out to you, you didn’t hesitate as you took it and let him pull you along.

“Where are we going?” You laughed.

“To show Mobius.” He told you, looking back to smile at you before hurrying over to Mobius who was sitting with a lunch tray.

“I found something.” Loki said, placing the files on the table and taking a seat, dragging you into the seat next to him, so close your knees brushed together.

Mobius ignored his words as he replied, “No, I said don’t bother me until you’ve read all the files.”

“We have read them all.” You and Loki said together, pausing to look at each other with small smiles and turning back to Mobius who watched the two of you with a raised eyebrow.

It wasn’t long before you were hiding a smile as Loki demonstrated how his theory worked using Mobius’ salad as Asgard and another worker’s drink and some salt. One of the many things you loved about Loki was how expressive he was when he was explaining something, especially when it was something he was passionate about. The hand gestures, the demonstrations, even just how elegantly he spoke…you loved watching him talk like this. There was an ache in your chest at seeing this again, but you managed to push it aside.

“There’s the apocalypse.” Loki said with a proud smile.

“That’s the apocalypse?” Mobius asked looking down at his, now ruined, lunch.

“If everything around you is destined to lead up to that one moment then whatever you do won’t have an impact,” You said looking from the salad to Loki who was nodding at you with a pleased expression, “right?”

“Exactly!” He exclaimed. “So, the Variant hides out in these apocalypses,”

“And nobody would ever know because whatever that Loki is doing can’t affect anything, whatever they do doesn’t stop the apocalypse.” You finished and Loki looked so pleased as he turned to face you.

“Not bad.” Mobius said, causing you and Loki to quickly look away from each other, making Mobius chuckle.

-

As Loki and Mobius tested the apocalypse theory out, you were forced to stay behind. Whilst you were allowed to help out with the research work, Renslayer had denied you access to leave the TVA.

You were sort of glad for the opportunity to be alone. Seeing Loki again was hard, he was so much like your Loki which made sense because technically he was your Loki just an earlier version of him. His mannerisms were so similar that sometimes you had to pause to catch your breath as the ache in your chest grew.

Sometimes Mobius sent Loki on a task when he saw you were getting overwhelmed and in the few minutes of Loki’s absence, Mobius would sit with you and talk just above a whisper, sometimes he praised you, sometimes he told you stories, whatever he did always grounded you and you were so thankful to the man.

Some days it was almost like the time cell they had you in were you just wanted to pretend that he was the Loki you knew, pretend that he knew you too. You wanted him to wrap his arms around you and just let the world fall away. It would’ve been so easy to do it but you pushed through it and carried on with the helping find the other Loki.

-

“So, tell me where you’re going again.” You asked Loki as Mobius spoke with somebody.

“Earth, more precisely Haven Hills, Alabama, 2050. It’s a corporate town owned by Roxxcart until it’s wiped out by a hurricane.” Loki told you.

“And that’s where you think Loki’s hiding?” Loki looked at you watching as you nervously bit your lip. He frowned seeing how worried you were.

“Hey,” Loki said, placing his hand under your chin and guiding you to look up at him. He let his palm rest against your cheek. “What’s wrong?”

You sighed as you let your eyes fall closed. You didn’t know what was wrong, you just knew something didn’t feel right.

“What if something goes wrong?” You asked instead of answering.

“It’s going to be fine.” Loki assured you with a small smile but you just shook your head before moving away from him to pace.

“You don’t know that Loki, you don’t know it’ll be fine!” You exclaimed, causing Loki’s eyes to widen in concern.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Loki whispered as he reached for you, pulling you close so that your head rested on his chest. He felt you tense up for a moment before relaxing into him and he let his hand rub comfortingly up and down your back. “Tell me what’s wrong, darling.”

That seemed to be the final straw for you and before Loki knew it you were sobbing into his chest, gripping him tightly like he’d disappear if you let go.

“It’s ok, you’re ok.” Loki continued to whisper soothing words into your hair as he held you.

Mobius turned to call Loki over, the task force ready to leave but when he saw the two of you huddled together he gestured for everyone to move away to give the two of you some privacy.

“Tell me what’s wrong, love, so I can fix it.” Loki said after you began to calm down. He pulled you away from him, frowning as you whimpered but relaxed as he just wiped your tears away, keeping you close the entire time.

“The last time I…” You trailed off, taking a shaky breath, “The last time I lost you, you told me everything would be fine. You were lying of course; you knew you were lying but I didn’t. I didn’t know just how bad it would be and now you’re going to face another Loki, one who has been avoiding and killing minutemen for longer than I’ve been alive. I can’t lose you again, I can’t lose you.” You rushed out, your voice breaking at the end as another round of tears fell from your eyes.

Loki paused for a moment and just watched you, feeling his heart clench in sympathy. He hated his future self for dying, for leaving you alone but he also knew how much he loved Thor, he’d rather the both of you live without him than him having to live without either of you. Maybe that made him selfish but he could see why his future self had made the sacrifice.

“I’m sorry, darling,” He said as he pulled you back into his arms, “I’m so sorry that you were left alone, believe me if I could change it I would no matter what I had to do but if it comes down to you or me, I’m always going to choose you. I know that after only knowing you for a short amount of time so the Loki you spent years with….well I can see why he wouldn’t hesitate. You can come with us, I’ll convince Mobius, if it’ll make you feel better, but everything really is going to be ok.” Loki promised as he placed a kiss on the top of your head.

As he turned his head, he saw Mobius who gestured that they needed to go. Silently, he pointed to you and then to Mobius, pleading with the man to let you go. He watched as Mobius frowned before looking down the hallway and back to the two of you before reluctantly nodding and mouthing “quickly.”

“Let’s go.” Loki said as he linked your hands together and led you to the task force.

Mobius smiled at you softly and you mouthed a thank you towards him before you were all being ushered through the doorway.

-

The rain was…well it was apocalyptic. You watched as Loki looked up at the sky as it thundered dangerously with a small smile, your Loki did that too, just looked up at the sky and thought of Thor when the weather was stormy.

Once the task force was inside Loki used his magic to dry the two of you off causing you to jump slightly, it had been so long since you’d been around magic.

“Thank you.” You said and Loki just smiled down at you.

“The hell was that?” One of the agents asked, causing Loki to grin cheekily.

“That was me using magic to dry our clothes so we don’t announce ourselves with every squeaky footstep like the rest of you.” You couldn’t help but snort, causing Hunter B-15 to glare at you.

“Take both teams and sweep the storm shelter.” She said to the rest of the task force and everyone was quick to move.

“Loki and I are gonna check out the Green House. We’ll meet…” Mobius began but was quickly cut off by Hunter B-15.

“No.”

“No?” He asked in confusion

“You go with D-90 and take Y/L/N with you. He stays with me.” She said, causing Loki to glance first at Mobius then you, you watched him with a concerned look but eventually nodded.

Mobius and Hunter B-15 bickered back and forth before Loki cut in.

“Mobius, it’s fine. It’s fine. You can trust me. I understand I have to earn that, so, I will.” He said, again looking from Mobius to you. You smiled at him, causing him to smile back.

“Why is it the people you can’t trust are always saying, “Trust me”?” Mobius muttered to you before turning to Hunter B-15, “Okay, try to hang on to your Time Collar this time. We’ll see you in the showroom.”

And with that everyone went their separate ways.

-

“You can trust him, you know.” You told Mobius once you were far away enough from the others.

“No, you can trust him.” Mobius said with a fond smile. “Me however, well we’ll see.”

The two of you walked behind the group following as they led you into a room full of people seeking refuge.

“Check the bag for reset chargers.” One of the hunters said and everyone was quick to set to work as the people around you panicked.

“Hey! These people are scared.” Mobius snapped at one of the hunters who was being particularly vicious towards the people, looking at him now you recognised him as one of your harsher interrogators.

“They’re about to die. They should be scared.” He snapped back causing your eyes to widen in horror at the harshness.

“Not of us.” Mobius said calmly.

“Please we’ve got women and children.” A man said as he gently grabbed your arm and pleaded with you. You looked at him with tears in your eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” You whispered before Mobius led you away. “You’re really going to let these people die?”

“Our job isn’t to save them.” Mobius said sadly, sympathising with you. The first few missions are always the hardest.

“No,” You scoffed as you moved away from him, “your job is to make sure they die.” You hissed before stalking out of the room.

Tears made their way down your face as you left the room but you angrily brushed them away as you tried to find Loki. You had always thought something seemed off with the TVA but seeing their work up close made you nauseous.

A thud snapped you out of your thoughts and you peeked around a corner just in time to see Hunter B-15 hit the floor. You spared her little thought; Mobius would find her and instead you followed Loki.

You saw Loki standing alone but talking to somebody.

“I see, that’s your plan, lure us all here so you can blow the place up.”

You watched as a giant of a man came from nowhere and kicked Loki in the chest sending him flying backwards. The man, a Loki perhaps?, just thanked him for helping stall for time before hitting him again sending him further back. Loki used his magic but still the man showed no signs of slowing down.

“Stop hiding.” Loki commanded, causing you to raise an eyebrow. More than likely the Loki variant then, hiding in the bodies of refugees.

A sick feeling suddenly came over you as you watched the Loki variant choke Loki, images of Thanos and Loki invaded your mind and it took everything for you to stay quiet.

You breathed a sigh of relief as he let Loki go though it was short lived as Loki went flying again, smashing into one of the stands.

The Loki variant’s eyes turned green before the man hit the floor with a laugh, suddenly there was a hooded figure with glowing green hands standing behind him. As Loki’s voice bounced around the room, the Loki variant pulled his hood down.

There stood a woman. Loki in her true form.

“This isn’t about you.” She snarled.

“Right.” Loki said, sounding dubious before the power shut down. The last thing you saw was a smirk on the Loki variant’s face.

The lighting turned red as the Loki variant picked up a tempad, you watched as the familiar orange doorway appeared and that bad feeling you had about Loki coming here grew painfully.

This wasn’t going to end well for anybody.

She waved at Loki before stepping through the doorway and moments later Mobius, Hunter B-15 and another Hunter where running down the hallway shouting for Loki to stop.

“Loki, wait!” Mobius pleaded and Loki actually looked torn before shaking his head and walking towards the door.

“Loki!” You yelled, finally stepping out from behind one of the isles.

Here Loki paused before turning to you, his eyes were wide as he looked at you and, in that moment, you knew what would happen.

“Please.” You whispered and he looked crushed.

Mobius was near him now, nearly within distance to grab him, to push him away from that damned doorway but he was too late.

‘I’m sorry darling.’ Loki mouthed before he ran through the doorway.

The orange faded to nothing just as Mobius reached it and you could do nothing but stare at the doorway with an aching heart.

Read part two here!

It's Going To Be You

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Prompt - I knew I did from that first moment we met. It was…not love at first sight exactly, but - familiarity. Like: oh, hello, it’s you. It’s going to be you.

—————————————————–

Spencer Reid knew from the moment he laid eyes on you that you were something else, he could tell from one glance that you would change his life. No words needed to be exchanged for the man to be completely and utterly taken by you. He watched as you walked through the door, though your head was held high, shoulders pushed back giving the impression of complete confidence, he saw the way you fiddled with the strap of your bag with one hand. When he looked at your other hand he could see your forefinger picking at your thumb, clearly a nervous habit. He watched as you looked around the room, watched as Rossi made his way over to you, guiding you over to Hotch’s office with a smile.

“Down, pretty boy.” Derek grinned as Spencer startled, his head snapping around to face Derek just as you entered Hotch’s office. “I’ve never seen that look on your face and you don’t even know her name.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Spencer replied, cringing at how unconvincing he sounded.

He turned away from Derek and tried to focus on his paperwork but he could stop his eyes from straying over to the closed office door every few minutes much to Derek and Rossi’s amusement.

“Who is she anyway?” Derek asked.

“She’s lucky number ten,” Rossi told them, smothering a smile as Spencer looked over, “who knew finding another agent would be so difficult.”

“Wait,” another voice interrupted, “there’s a new person here? Is she nice? Why is that always my first question?” The group laughed as Penelope quizzed Rossi.

“Listen, I know as much as you people.” He said and before anyone else could speak Penelope was being handed a folder causing them all to groan.

-

“Agent Hotchner?” You asked as you were granted access to the office.

Hotch stood as you walked in, moving around his desk to hold a hand out to you.

“Yes and you’re Y/F/N Y/L/N, I presume?” He asked, smiling slightly at you as you nodded, still fiddling with your bag. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, please have a seat.”

“Thank you sir.” You smiled, taking a seat in the offered chair watching as he made his way back behind his desk.

“Your supervisor spoke very highly of you when I spoke with him, your success rate is impressive.” Hotch praised, glancing down at the file in front of him. “Your latest case seemed rather difficult, are you sure you’re ready to be back in the field again?”

“I passed all my psychiatric exams, I was cleared to return.” You told him stiffly.

“I’m aware of your results, I just want to be sure you’re ready. Infiltrating yourself into the life of Douglas Miller couldn’t have been an easy feat.” Hotch watched as a look of satisfaction took over your face.

“I’m ready, sir.” You told him, relaxing slightly. “It was a tough case, I’ll be the first to admit that seeing what I saw had an impact but I can do this.”

Hotch smiled at you before closing the folder.

“I believe you,” he said, “I think you’ll be a valuable addition to this team.”

The words were what you were hoping to hear, you’d wanted a job with the BAU for longer than you could remember but you paused. Surely it wasn’t that easy, right?

“Wait? That’s it?” You asked.

“That’s it.” Hotch confirmed, fighting back a smile at your expression.

“But- but I’ve been here less than five minutes.” You countered back, there were so many emotions going on within you that you felt slightly overwhelmed.

“Y/N, ever since your name was put forward I looked into your work and I was impressed. Your skills at undercover work are far above what I’ve seen in a long time, that alone would be an incredibly useful assest to the team but on top of that your ability to connect and empathise with unsubs, fast thinking and your profiling skills- trust me, you deserve this job and I have complete faith in you.” Hotch’s words had left you speechless, you had no clue how to respond but thankfully you didn’t have to as the door was pushed open and both you and Hotch turned to look at the brightly dressed woman in the doorway.

“I’m sorry to interrupt sir but we have a case.” The woman said and Hotch stood gesturing for you to follow.

“You have a to go bag?” He asked as you both walked out the door.

“Yes sir.” You nodded, still baffled by how well things had gone.

“Good, welcome to the team Y/L/N.”

-

“Everyone, this is SSA Y/F/N Y/L/N. I’m sure proper introductions can be made later.” Hotch said as the two of you entered the room before gesturing to Garcia that she could begin.

“Ok, yes, so, we have five bodies so far found in Wyoming. The first two bodies were hidden amongst some trees close to firehole bay. The ME presumes that the time of death was mostly likely a week ago but we should have full confirmation when you arrive. The victims, who we haven’t been able to identify yet, but I am working on it, were stripped completely and the wounds, that are in your files because I so do not need to see that, show heavy signs of torture. ” Garcia informed you all.

“The next body was a single male, again stripped and tortured and the ME says this death is most likely four to five days old. This body was found a few miles away from Basin Bay Point campsite.”

“Wait a second,” somebody interrupted, causing you to turn your head. There sat a man, younger than the rest of the team, he was…how you had missed him you didn’t know but now you felt like you couldn’t look away. “If I’m not mistaken those places are roughly twenty miles from each other at walking distance.”

“And driving distance?” An older man asked.

“I don’t think there is a way to drive to Basin Bay Point, especially not to where the body was left.” The younger man replied, looking down at the folder he was given with a frown.

“I’ll have a map ready for you on the plane.” Penelope assured him before continuing. “Now, the next two bodies were the most recent, ME says they were killed a day or two ago and these victims we have been able to identify as Taylor Gomez and her boyfriend Jack Gaskarth.” Penelope said as she brought their pictures up. “They were never reported missing because they had told friends and family they were going camping, which checks out because their bodies were found three miles away from Lewis Lake campground. They show the same wounds as the other vics.” Garcia explained.

You grimaced as you looked down at the tablet Hotch had passed you as you saw a young man and woman, naked with slices all across their bodies, as well as deep bruising to the neck.

“What was the CoD, Garcia?” The younger man spoke up again.

“ME still needs to run a full examination but her best bet is that it was asphyxiation.” She told him with a frown.

“That makes sense, there isn’t a lot of blood or scabbing which suggests they were done post mortem.”

“So what,” you spoke up, pausing for a moment when everyone turned to you, “the unsub blitz attacks the victims and kills them before torturing them? What’s the point in that?”

“It could be a number of things actually. Perhaps it’s not about the kills for him but more to do with the fascination of the human body, we’ve seen it before where curiosity leads to this kind of attack. It could also be that he has to kill, he has a compulsion to kill and once he’s given into that compulsion he gets to fulfil other urges. If I had to guess I’d say the victims are victims of opportunity-” The younger man rambled, his hands gesturing in front of him as he spoke causing you to smile.

“Because there is no set pattern, he crosses race and gender lines and there’s no secondary location.” You cut off the other man who looked at you with a grin.

“Exactly, the area is so isolated that he can get away with quick and easy killings but because it doesn’t seem like there’s a secondary location yet we have to presume that the torture is a means to satisfy himself when he can’t hold his victims hostage.”

“It’s a long flight and this unsub doesn’t appear to be slowing down. Wheels up in fifteen.” Hotch said as he stood up, everyone was quick to follow until it was just you and the guy you had spoken to left.

“Hi.” He said, causing you to turn around with a smile.

“Hi.”

“I’m Spencer, Spencer Reid.” He introduced himself.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N, nice to meet you.” You replied, reaching out your hand to shake his, your eyebrows pulling together slightly as he shook his head.

“Sorry, I don’t um,” He said, causing you to drop your hand and nod understandingly, “it’s nothing against you, just…germs.” He trailed off, berating himself in his head.

“No problem.” You smiled again, god that smile. Spencer felt his heart race.

“Congratulations on joining the team.” He praised as the two of you walked out of the round table room.

“Thank you, I’ve wanted this for so long.” He watched as the smile fell from your face before you shook your head slightly.

“Is everything ok?” He asked, understanding the nerves. He couldn’t help but glance down, almost smiling as he saw you picking at your thumb.

“Yeah, I’m just, what if I mess up?” You couldn’t help but ask. After wanting this job for as long as you had, all the hard nights and long days spent training you were finally here and you’d be damned if you screwed everything up.

“You won’t, Hotch wouldn’t have hired you if he didn’t think you were good enough, trust me. I think you’ll be amazing.” He told you, flushing slightly at his own words and the soft smile that replaced the frown on your face.

“Thank you Spencer.” You replied softly and before he could respond the rest of the team was calling for the two of you to head to the air strip.

-

On the plane you were properly introduced to everyone as you took a seat next to Spencer, sitting opposite Hotch and Rossi. On the table in front of you Spencer had both a map of the US and a smaller map of Wyoming. You watched his fingers trace invisible lines as his eyebrows knitted together.

You were trying not to stare, really you were, but there was just something about the man that made you want to get to know him.

Thankfully before anyone noticed your eyes glancing at Spencer every few moments, the man himself spoke.

“Guys, if you map out where the five victims were found,” Spencer began, circling three places on the map as he did, “it looks like the victims might have been hiking the continental divide trail.”

“Pretty boy, isn’t that trail like thousands of miles long?” Morgan asked, watching as Spencer nodded, pushing the little map of Wyoming out of the way for a moment and drawing a line down the map of the US.

“This is the continental divide trail, it’s 3,300 miles long and it’s actually quite difficult to hike. These people had to have been exceptionally fit and healthy which further backs up the theory that these were blitz attacks. You can go days without seeing other people when hiking the trail and most hikers have to give up because of lack of supplies or needing urgent medical care from injuries and illnesses they attract. A part of the Wyoming part of the trail includes a 120 mile stretch of desert with water sources few and far between.” Spencer rambled and you couldn’t help the soft smile, though you did try to hide it behind your hand, glancing away from Rossi when you locked eyes with him and he raised an eyebrow at you.

“So we have a serial killer and 3,300 miles of potential hunting grounds?” JJ asked.

“So far he seems to be focusing on Wyoming, which narrows the geographic profile down to…’ Spencer paused as he pulled the Wyoming map closer to him, “550 miles.”

“I hope you all brought your hiking boots.” Rossi said as groans filled the jet.

“Hello my crime fighters.” Garcia’s voice sounded through the speakers. “Hotch, the families of the latest two victims are at the station waiting for you.”

“Thank you Garcia,” Hotch replied before turning to the team. “JJ, I want you to come with me to the station and help interview the families. We also need to get ahead of the media on this before they start glorifying the unsub. Reid, since the geographic profile is mostly established, I want you to take Y/L/N and head to the latest crime scene. Dave and Morgan, the two of you head to the second crime scene.”

You and Spencer both shared a look at the news you were travelling to a crime scene that couldn’t be driven too. Whilst you managed to pass the FBI’s training and fitness tests you weren’t exactly athletically inclined and seeing from the look Spencer was giving you neither was he.

Judging from the chuckles that filled the plane the others had come to the same conclusion that you and Spencer were not going to recover from this trip.

-

You had driven as close to the crime scene as you could get, which was thankfully closer than the one Morgan and Rossi had to go to. It was still a hell of a hike to get to where the unsub had dumped the bodies.

“Ok, ok,” Spencer panted, cheeks flushed from the heat. “Let’s take a break.”

“Please.” You were quick to agree and the two of you sat down heavily on a fallen tree trunk. You had all been warned that you needed supplies, even for a short hike. So you had both been sent out with backpacks filled with water bottles and food. There were other supplies like maps, compasses and first aid kits that you were hoping you wouldn’t have to use. Thankfully you had been paired with the man with the eidetic memory because you couldn’t read a map to save your life.

After the two of you gulped down some water and caught your breath Spencer spoke up.

“Why the BAU?” He asked suddenly, causing you to look up in confusion.

“Sorry?” You replied.

“You said you had wanted to join the BAU for a long time, why?” He asked again, not pushing you when you paused.

It wasn’t a secret what had happened to your family, Spencer could easily find the information out if he wanted to but you wanted to be the one to tell him. It wasn’t a story you liked sharing with people but something about Spencer made you feel…safe.

“When I was a kid there was a serial killer but he was in the next state over and we were from a small town so nobody thought to worry and after a while things went quiet so everyone just assumed he stopped, you know? Anyway, one day I went to my friend’s house, it was summer and I was always out with my friends. I was there for a few hours but I was always home in time for dinner except for this day, I ended up losing track of time and headed home an hour late. When I got home, my momma was there in the kitchen. She was covered in blood and I just screamed. The rest of my family didn’t make it either. When the police came they said the markings were the same as the victims from the next state over.” You told him, not pausing for breath as you rushed through the story. You watched as his expression fell, his sympathy written on his face.

“I’m so sorry.” He told you and you could hear the sincerity in his tone. You gave him a small smile before continuing.

“I could just never understand why. The thing that kept me up at night was that question: why? Why them? Why did he come here? Why wasn’t I home? Why did I deserve to live? I started researching and somehow came across an article about the BAU, from there I knew I wanted to work there.”

“Most people wouldn’t be able to come back from something like that, especially at such a young age.” Spencer said, causing you to glance over at him. “They’d be so proud of you.”

You couldn’t help but let out what sounded like a chuckle and a sob at those words, causing Spencer’s eyes to widen in fear he had upset you further but then you smile brightly and he couldn’t help but smile back.

“I like to think so.” You said softly. “You ready to continue?” You asked, chuckling as he groaned before standing up.

“I hate Hotch.” Was the grumbled response and the laugh he received in return made every sore bone and the aching feet worth it.

-

“We know that this unsub is a physically fit white male in his mid to late thirties.” Hotch began.

“Looking at the geographical pattern it’s safe to assume that he too is hiking the Continental Divide Trail in search of victims who are isolated from the rest of civilization. He also has no problems taking down two victims.” Spencer continued.

“The period in between kills is lessening so we should expect to find another body soon, have as many officers as possible on the rest of the trail.” You picked up.

“Considering the last kill was two days ago, the average person could walk up to 30 miles a day on normal terrain but we have to consider that the terrain out there is harsh so lets say he walks 20 miles a day that gives up a 40 mile radius he could be in. He is guaranteed to stay on the continental divide trail so stop every male you see.” Spencer told the LEO’s and after some more information was shared everyone headed off in different directions, the BAU members heading into the room they had been given to work in.

“Y/N,” Hotch said, causing everyone to look over at you.

“Yes sir?” You asked, looking up from your laptop.

“You’re probably the most skilled undercover agent in this room,” He said, causing your cheeks to flush and Spencer couldn’t help but smile. “I know this isn’t exactly the type of case you’d usually be assigned but perhaps if we send you out there we have a better chance of catching him. This man is impulsive, if he sees you he won’t be able to control himself.” Hotch explained, ignoring the questioning looks he was getting from most of the team.

You, however, relaxed, thankful that you hadn’t done something wrong. Undercover work was easy, you were comfortable with it, you knew you were good at it. Obviously you weren’t as confident at this part of the job yet, how could you be on your first case, but undercover work? That was your area of expertise.

“Of course sir.” You agreed easily before remembering how fun the small hike to the last crime scene was…your body would not thank you for signing up for a much longer hike.

“Hotch, are you sure that’s a good idea?” Morgan spoke up causing you to frown. Sure they didn’t know you yet but surely your record spoke for itself. “No offence to you,” he said quickly as he turned to you, “it’s just-“

But before he could finish Hotch cut him off, “I have full faith in Y/L/N’s abilities.”

You couldn’t help feeling a swell of pride at Hotch’s words, a man who you looked up to, a man who barely knew you but was trusting you with so much already. You locked eyes with Spencer who smiled at you reassuringly.

“I’m not doubting the kid’s abilities,” Morgan continued, missing the way you rolled your eyes at being called a kid. “I’m just saying maybe don’t send her in on her own on her first case.”

“I’ll go with her.” Spencer spoke up before Hotch could argue back.

Your eyes widened at Spencer’s offer, he did just as well as you did on your first outing and now he was offering to put himself through hours more of that for what?

“Are you ok with that, Y/N?” Hotch asked you.

You didn’t even hesitate to nod, more than happy for the opportunity to spend time with Spencer Reid.

-

“We’ll be close by the whole time,” Hotch told you as he passed you your backpack filled with supplies, “the second we hear something, we’ll be there.” He assured you and you couldn’t help but smile at his concern.

“I’ll be fine, sir. This is actually the part of the job I’m good at.” You laughed, watching as his lip twitched upwards.

“You’ve been a great help in coming up with a profile too.” He assured you and before you could say anything the rest of the team was flooding in.

The plan for you and Spencer to hike up to a specific spot that Spencer had managed to pinpoint the unsub at and set up camp there. From there you would wait and hope for the unsub to appear. The man was impulsive and his need to kill would be overwhelming by now. The two of you were wired up so that if the unsub appeared the rest of the team could step in and help with the arrest.

You and Spencer were dropped off half an hour away from your campsite just so that if the unsub was around he wouldn’t suspect anything.

The walk was mostly silent, both you and Spencer focusing on not breaking an ankle on the uneven terrain when Spencer finally spoke up.

“Morgan didn’t mean anything insulting.” He told you, causing you to pause before shrugging your shoulders and continuing. When you stayed silent Spencer continued, “he’s just protective but sometimes he isn’t really good at showing it and it comes across…”

“It comes across like he thinks I can’t do my job despite this being my forte.” You finished with a huff before sighing. “I’m sorry, I just…you can’t imagine how many times a male colleague has said I can’t do something and then a supervisor has agreed, you don’t understand how hard I have to fight to be given assignments and not have somebody constantly berating me.” You ranted.

“People look at me like I’m a child. When I first joined the BAU nobody would take me seriously, without Gideon I don’t know what would have happened.” Spencer told you quietly, causing you to frown.

“So you can understand why it’s so frustrating that someone who doesn’t know me didn’t even want to give me a chance.” You replied, causing him to nod sadly. ‘I know he probably didn’t mean anything but…”

“You’ve heard that your entire career.” Spencer finished.

“Hotch was the first person to give me a chance without any hesitation.” You told him softly, watching as he smiled at that. “This should be close enough.” You said as you looked around, the place looked similar to the image Spencer had shown the team.

“Please tell me you know how to put a tent up.” You said, watching as his face twisted.

“I know the theory?” The way his response sounded like a question made you smile as you pulled poles and material out of a bag. The two of you staring down at the mess with matching expressions of confusion.

“Now would be a really good time for the unsub to attack.” He muttered, causing you to laugh loudly. Spencer couldn’t help but grin over at you, your cheeks flushing as you caught the expression.

It took longer than either you or Spencer were willing to admit to put the tent up, despite the fact that it wouldn’t get used, you had to make it look like the pair of you were really camping. There was a lot of grumbling, many curse words and a cut or two.

There was also a lot of laughter coming from the comms in your ears causing both you and Spencer to roll your eyes.

Once the tent was up, Spencer lay a blanket down outside of it and sat down, gesturing for you to do the same. Miraculously the two of you got a fire started and as the sun set and the night time air chilled you were thankful for it.

“I don’t camp but I guess I can see the appeal.” Spencer told you as he titled his head back to look up at the stars. You glanced up too, the sky wasn’t totally black yet, more of an inky blue colour and you could see every star on the cloudless night.

It was beautiful and yet you still found your gaze falling back on Spencer.

“Yeah, me too.” You replied softly, your voice quiet so as not to break the peacefulness around you.

Somehow the two of you ended up laying down and looking up at the sky, you had a smile on your face that refused to move as Spencer’s hushed voice told you facts about stars.

“I’m glad you’re on the team.” Spencer whispered after a long pause of silence. It took you a moment to register his words before you turned your head, coming face to face with the man.

“Me too.” You whispered back, meaning the words with your entire being.

Just as Spencer went to say something you heard a rustle in the bushes and locked eyes with Spencer who nodded.

The two of you waited, not waiting to disrupt the operation if it just turned out to be an animal, but as you pushed yourself up on your elbow and discreetly looked around you saw a faint outline of a man. He was hidden behind a tree but he was watching the two of you.

“The hike up here was exactly what we needed.” You told Spencer and through the comms you heard the team moving out.

“You’re right.” He played along, smiling up at you from his reclined position.

Before you knew what was happening Spencer had his gun out and the unsub grabbed you, placing you in front of him as a human shield. If someone asked you, you would never have been able to recall the events that led to you having a knife held to your neck.

You saw the panicked look in Spencer’s eyes but you couldn’t hear his thoughts, they were overwhelming. Thoughts of Maeve passed through his mind as he pleaded with anyone who would listen to let you be ok, he couldn’t lose you too. Hell, he’d only known you a few days and yet he knew you were special, he knew he had to have you in his life. If you died now…

“Just let her go.” Spencer said, keeping his gun trained on the man.

“I let her go, you ship me off to death row.” The man responded, his face close to your face, too close. The smell of his breath had you grimacing.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Spencer responded, not even thinking. He just needed to get you away.

“Spenc, what you doing kid?” He heard Morgan through his ear piece but he just shook his head before shooting you a reassuring smile, trying not to focus on the tears in your eyes or the blood on your neck.

“I’m listenin’.” The unsub replied after a moment of silence, gesturing for Spencer to continue.

“Let her go,” He said, lowering his gun, “I won’t arrest you. You can get a head start before anyone else gets here. Just let her go.” Spencer pleaded.

It was a tense few seconds in which Spencer never took his eyes off you, he hated to see that scared look in your eyes, the fear in them made Spencer ache.

“Let her go.” Spencer said once more and he let out a sigh of relief as you were pushed into his arms.

Just as the unsub ran to leave, you twisted around in Spencer’s arms and drew your own gun, shooting the unsub in the leg. The rest of the team ran in just as the man fell to the ground.

Spencer turned you around so that you were facing him, his hands on your shoulders.

“Are you ok?” He asked, Morgan and Hotch walking over whilst Rossi and JJ dealt with the man.

You didn’t respond with words, instead you wrapped your arms around Spencer. He didn’t hesitate to wrap his own around you, holding you close as you let the tears slid down your face.

You pulled away abruptly, rubbing your eyes as you did.

“Sorry, you don’t like to be touched and here I am-“ You said but Spencer just cut you off.

“It’s fine, really.” He assured you before his attention turned to your neck. The knife hadn’t pierced the skin too badly, there was a small bit of blood where the knife had nicked you when the unsub pressed a bit too hard.

“Are you ok?” He asked again, fingers on your jaw so that he could tilt your face and get a better look.

“Spencer, I’m fine.” You assured him but that didn’t stop him from getting you medical attention the moment you were back in the town.

Spencer watched as you squirmed away from the nurse seeing to you with a soft smile.

There was something about you that made him feel so free, like he could be himself and the thought of losing you…he didn’t want to think about it again.

“You like her.” Derek said as he came to stand next to the younger man.

“That’s ridiculous, I’ve known her for a few days.” Spencer shot back but he knew his friend was right.

“If she’s the right girl, a few days is all you need.” Was Derek’s reply before he walked away, leaving Spencer looking at you with a thoughtful look on his face.

-

The plane ride home was uneventful.

You took the seat next to Spencer again and watched him pull a book out. You couldn’t help but glance down at it, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion as you didn’t recognise the language.

“It’s Russian.” He told you quietly, not wanting to disturb anyone as they settled in for a long flight.

“You read Russian?” You asked just as quietly, watching as he smiled bashfully and shrugged before nodding. You glanced down at the pages again before letting out a small yawn. “Can you read to me?” You asked him, smiling as he nodded again.

“Of course,” He said and with that it wasn’t long before you fell asleep to the soothing sound of Spencer Reid.

-

“Ask her, man.” Morgan said as both he and Spencer watched you leave the office after finishing your paperwork. Spencer too was done and Morgan assured him he’d make sure Hotch received it.

There was only a brief moment of hesitation before Spencer snatched his satchel up and ran to the elevators, getting there just before they shut on you.

“Hey.” He greeted as he stepped in.

“Hi.” You smiled, brushing a piece of hair out of your face.

“I was wondering, I mean if you wanted to, of course you don’t have to, I was only suggesting but I’d really like it if you would,” Spencer rambled before cutting himself out with a groaning causing you to giggle.

“Are you asking me out?” You asked, cheeks flushing as you asked.

“I’m trying to,” he told you, “but I’m not very good at this.”

“Just ask.” You told him softly.

“Would you like to go out with me?” He asked after taking a deep and calming breath.

“I’d love to.” You grinned, thankful that the man had made a move. You wouldn’t have risked asking him on the chance that you were reading him wrong and he didn’t like you but thankfully he had taken it into his own hands.

“Good. Great. That, that’s great.” He repeated, a soft grin spreading across his face causing you to giggle as the doors opened.

The two of you walked out together and there was a moment of awkward silence before Spencer dipped his head down to kiss your cheek, making your blush even more prominent.

You looked so pretty when you blushed, Spencer thought.

“I’ll call you.” He promised.

“I hope so.” You replied before heading towards your car, when you turned around you saw Spencer still stood by the doors with a smile still on his face. You giggled to yourself but couldn’t stop smiling yourself if you tried.

Spencer Reid was something else and you couldn’t wait to learn everything about that wonderful man.

Candy & Cuddles

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Requested - Yes - 239 with thor pls

Prompts - 239 - “You can’t watch Willy Wonka without massive amounts of junk food.”

As Thor began spending more time on Earth the two of you had grown closer and you had taken it upon yourself to introduce the God to all the movies, shows, songs...pretty much everything he was clueless about.

There was a long list but it was fun, watching as Thor followed you around, listening to every word you said. Tony had compared him to a golden retriever once and honestly you could see it.

Today you weren’t feeling so great as you headed down to the kitchen. You had been away on a mission for the past three days. It had taken a toll on you and today you were feeling the extent of the job.

“Y/N!” Thor exclaimed as you walked into the room, his whole face lighting up. Despite how you were feeling you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face as you saw him. He had been visiting Asgard for a week and you had missed him dearly.

“Hi Thor.” You greeted, willingly going into his open arms and resting your head against his chest as he held you close, seeing that you needed the comfort right now.

“Is everything ok?” He asked after you pulled away after a minute or two.

“Yeah, it was just a rough mission.” Thor nodded sympathetically, he had had many rough missions and knew how draining they could be.

“How about we spend the day watching some more of those movies?” Thor suggested, brushing a strand of hair out of your face as he did so. You smiled up at the God softly as he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead. “How about the one about the chocolate factory? I was rather intrigued by that.”

“Willy Wonka?” You asked with a laugh as Thor nodded excitedly. “Sure but we have to go to the store first.”

“The store?” Thor asked as he followed you into the elevator.

“Of course,” You told him seriously, “You can’t watch Willy Wonka without massive amounts of junk food.”

“Oh, of course.” Thor said, mirroring your serious tone.

It wasn’t long before the two of you burst into laughter.

-

Shopping with Thor was an...interesting experience to say the least.

The man attracted everybody's attention immediately, looking so out of place in the supermarket. He was a sweetheart to everyone that approached him and was always quick to take pictures or sign things for the fans.

Once that was done, Thor turned into a child excited by everything in the store, he wanted to look at everything, wanted to buy everything. Before you were halfway around whatever store you were at he’d always asked you half a million questions.

You thought it was endearing though, the way the God was so easily pleased. He managed to find joy in such human things, grocery shopping, walking around the park, driving in a car. The way he saw the Earth, describing its beauty to you when the two of you sat on the roof of the compound looking up at the stars made you pause before looking around and appreciating the world around you.

“So what food do we need then?” Thor asked as the two of you stopped in front of a wide selection of candy.

“All of it.” You replied with a grin and quickly the two of you were filling up the cart with a sickening amount of candy.

“Are you certain this is a good idea?” Thor laughed as the pair of you checked out.

“Probably not but it’s the proper way to experience Willy Wonka, Thor.” You rolled your eyes fondly as Thor grabbed the bags before you could and the two of you headed back to the tower.

-

The two of you went your separate ways once you were back at the tower, you went to your room to change back into some comfy pyjamas whilst Thor went to his room to do the same whilst having JARVIS set the movie up in the room.

Once you’d changed you quickly made your way down to Thor’s room, smiling as you saw him already in the bed with the covers drawn back and the movie waiting to be played. You paused just to take in the scene before Thor was patting the bed and you went over, happily tucking yourself under his arm, letting him pull you against his chest and wrap the blanket around the both of you.

As the movie played Thor happily chatted away, asking you all sorts of questions which you answered with a smile on your face. When Thor’s attention was fully on the movie, his fingers trailed across your waist unconsciously and honestly, even with the stomach ache that was already starting to develop, there was nowhere else you’d rather be.

“Thank you.” You whispered before leaning up to kiss his jaw. Thor didn’t reply with words, he just pulled you closer and kissed your head.

_________

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Losing You, It's Not An Option

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Prompt - 'The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair.’

Notes - This is my first time writing for Hotch so if it’s a little ooc, I do apologise.

It had been a rough case, three missing kids turned up dead before the FBI had been called in and another one missing for over ten hours. You had fourteen hours to figure out where this kid was before the chances of her being found alive were gone.

The plane ride over seemed to drag, nobody said anything after being briefed on the case, all too absorbed in reading through the files, thoughts and theories running through everyone’s head a mile a minute.

This was a particularly tough case for you considering the last time you’d had a case involving a kid they had died just as you burst through the door.

If only you’d been faster then that kid would still be alive.

With a sigh, you scrubbed at your face before looking back down at the folder, missing the look of concern Hotch threw your way.

“Y/L/N, Reid, you’re with me at the latest crime scene. Rossi, Prentiss, JJ, you head over to the station, the family of the missing girl should already be there.” Hotch said as everyone got off the jet and into two separate SUV’s.

There wasn’t much at the crime scene at this point, nothing that gave you any clues and everyone was painfully aware of the countdown.

-

Around the fifteen hour mark the team was ready to give a profile. You stood to the side as you watched Hotch describe how you were looking for a male in his early to mid 30’s who would have recently lost a five year old brunette girl. Everyone took turns giving bits of information out but you stayed silent, this time noticing the glances from Hotch.

“Y/L/N can I have a word?” Hotch asked once the briefing was over. You just nodded and followed him into an empty meeting room.

“Is everything ok?” He asked, closing the door.

“Everything’s fine.” You told him and judging by the look he shot you, you weren’t very convincing.

“Y/N,” He began but you cut him off with a shake of your head.

“There’s a little girl out there and we need to find her. We don’t have any time to waste.” And with that you brushed past him and back into the bullpen just in time for Spencer to announce that Garcia had found somebody who matched the profile perfectly.

“Noah Williams, aged 33. He, his wife and daughter were involved in a car accident, only he made it out alive. The wife was declared DOA but the daughter didn’t die until…” Here Spencer paused to skim through the details Garcia had sent over, “four days ago.”

“When the kidnappings started.” You said, causing him to nod.

“We know he doesn’t spend long with his victims due to the length of time from the girls being reported missing and then found, it’s usually around the twenty four hour mark. Isabelle has been missing for nearly sixteen hours now giving us an eight hour window to find her.” Spencer informed everybody and Hotch was quick to pull his phone out, Garcia answering on the first ring.

“Garcia, we need an address.” He said into the phone and you could hear typing noises as Garcia desperately tried to find an address.

“I have two.” She announced after a few moments. “One’s a cabin in the woods, pretty secluded, the other is a house not too far from you.”

“Rossi, Prentiss, Morgan you take the house. Y/L/N, Reid you’re with me at the cabin.” Hotch directed and people around you were quickly moving.

“You think he’ll be at the house?” Rossi asked, causing Hotch to sigh.

“Probably not but we can’t rule it out.” Everyone agreed and it wasn’t long before you were all in the SUV’s heading to two separate locations praying that the little girl was still alive.

-

“Reid, you and Y/L/N take the back, I’ll take the front.” Hotch said and everyone nodded before moving into position.

Just as Spencer opened the backdoor and headed inside you noticed a door that must have led down into the cellar. It was concealed pretty well but things looked out of place, like somebody didn’t have enough time to properly cover it up.

You turned around, not seeing Spencer, and lifted your gun higher as you walked over to the door. Thankfully it pulled open without any resistance and you slowly headed down the stairs.

As you came to the bottom of the stairs you heard crying causing you to turn around to see Isabelle, looking scared and bruised but thankfully alive, and the man Garcia had sent you a picture of.

He held a gun to the little girl’s head causing you to pause for a second.

“Come any closer and I’ll kill her.” He threatened, causing the girl to let out a whimper.

“Hey, it’s ok, nobody needs to get hurt.” You said as you lowered your gun. You knew Hotch would kill you for this but you just needed that girl alive. “Look I’ve put my gun away, I’m not here to hurt you Mr Williams, I promise I just want to help.”

“You can’t help me!” He shouted, the hand holding the gun shaking.

“I can, I promise I’ll do everything I can to help you but don’t let her parent’s go through what you went through when you lost Amelia.” You knew bringing up his daughter could go one of two ways and if it went south…you really needed him pointing that gun at you and not Isabelle.

“Don’t say her name!” He yelled and you couldn’t help but relax as the gun was finally pointed at you.

“It crushed you to lose her, she was your little girl and it’s not fair that she’s gone but you can’t take it out on these girls.” You tried to reason with him but you could see it in his eyes, you could see there was no talking him down.

You looked down at Isabelle and managed to discreetly signal to her to run up the stairs, out of the cellar, from there Hotch and Reid could help her.

You held your palm flat as Williams took a step closer to you, his attention no longer on the girl and with that you closed your fist and Isabelle was darting past you causing Williams to scream.

Before you even had a chance to draw your gun you felt a burning hot pain in your thigh and then another in your upper arm. As you hit the floor you heard the sound of people running down the stairs and more gun shots before your eyes slipped shut and your body went numb.

-

“What was she thinking?” Hotch asked as he paced in the private waiting room the team had been given.

“That last case with the kid really got to her, man. She blamed herself for his death.” Derek said from his seat.

“She’ll be ok, she always is.” Rossi said after a few moments of silence. Spencer really hoped that was true but he couldn’t get the image of you out of his mind.

Blood seemed to be pouring out of both the wounds alarmingly fast, Hotch hadn’t hesitated to shoot Williams before he was knelt on the floor next to you, uncaring about the blood staining his clothes. His hand cupped your cheek as he pleaded for you to wake up, desperately shouting for a medic.

It was safe to say Hotch had always had a soft spot for you though it had never been said it was obvious to everyone on the team, except of course for you. Every time someone teased you about it you just smiled and shook your head.

The image of Hotch so emotional as he held your unconscious body against his chest was one that wouldn’t leave his mind for a long while.

Eventually a doctor came over and told them of your condition. You had lost a lot of blood, nearly flat lined as they operated on you, one of the bullets had shattered so it was a long process but thankfully you’d be fine.

“She’s waking up but she’s on a lot of medication right now so just take it easy with her.” The doctor advised as he led them to your room. Everyone thanked him before he left and Hotch turned to the team.

“I know you all want to see her but could I have a few moments alone?” He asked and nobody had it in them to deny that request, not when Hotch was looking more scared, more worried than they could ever recall.

“How you doing?” Hotch asked softly as he entered the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

“I’m ok.” You whispered, slowly opening your eyes and shooting him a small smile.

“Y/N,” Hotch began still talking softly as he pulled a chair close to your bed, “what you did today-” He started but you cut him off.

“Saved a little girl’s life.” You smiled, “I won’t apologize, if I could go back and do it all again, I wouldn’t change a damn thing.” You told him and were surprised to see him smile. It was a rare sight for you so you couldn’t help but savour the moment.

Ever since you’d started working at the FBI you’d always had a small crush on Hotch, never acting on it because he was your boss but it was always there. The rest of the team teased you about Hotch being soft on you but you knew there was no truth to it - though seeing him here, smiling at you had you hoping they could be right.

When Hotch took your hand in his, brushing his thumb against your knuckles you couldn’t help but stare down at the joined hands.

“I know you wouldn’t.” He said, the small smile still in place. “Y/N, I need you to be more careful though, you could have called for backup. Doing it alone got you hurt, you nearly died and losing you…it’s not an option.” Hotch said, the words surprising him as well as you.

You couldn’t help but stare at him for a moment, your eyebrows knitting together as you took in the words.

“Hotch,” You began, throat suddenly dry and you had no idea what you were going to say. Thankfully he cut you off.

“I can’t lose you, Y/N.” He admitted and every part of him was screaming to shut up, he was your boss, this wasn’t right but he’d almost lost you today, if the bullet had hit you a little more to the right you would have bled out. He couldn’t lose you. “I know it’s not appropriate, I know I’m your boss but I cannot lose you.” He repeated as he lifted your knuckles to his lips

Your eyes watered, Hotch was here with a confession you’d only dreamed of hearing.

God, you wished you weren’t high on pain meds right now.

“I don’t care that you’re my boss, I don’t care what people will say. I only want you, Aaron.” You whispered, causing him to let out a watery laugh.

“I’ve waited so long for you to say that.” He admitted quietly, making you blush. “You’re so beautiful.” He murmured.

“I just got shot, I look horrible,” you laughed, causing his eyes to brighten.

“You could never.” He said, his tone so painfully honest that all you could do was smile shyly at him, a soft blush covering your cheeks.

The two of you stayed silent for a moment before a knock on the door interrupted you as Derek poked his head around. You watched as his eyes almost immediately darted to your joined hands, a small grin on his face.

“Can we come in?” He asked looking at Hotch and then you, both of you nodded and pretty quickly everyone was settled in your room.

Hotch never let go of your hand.

-

“You can take the jet home, we’ll be fine here.” Hotch told everyone as they got back to the hotel that night. There was a sense of pride as everyone shook their heads no, wanting to wait until you were released so you could all head home together.

His team was truly amazing.

Alone in bed he had plenty of time to think of the conversation that took place between the two of you. There had always been something about you but he never focused on it, when you had first joined the team he was still married but after his divorce he started noticing you more.

It was true he had always been less strict with you but he was always able to brush it off until one day he realised he was falling for you. He didn’t know when it happened just that it did but he was your boss, it wasn’t allowed.

But seeing you in that hospital bed, looking so small attached to various different wires and monitors, watching as you bled out on the dirty floor of the cellar…rules be damned, he wasn’t going to waste any opportunities with you. Even if you told him you didn’t feel the same, at least he tried.

But somehow you did feel the same.

He was still trying to register that. How could someone like you, someone so young, so much potential, so much goodness, like someone like him, he was older, he was divorced, he had a kid.

With a sigh, he rolled over and closed his eyes.

You liked him.

He wouldn’t let a day go by where he wouldn’t show you how much he cared for you.

He couldn’t lose you, it wasn’t an option.

-

“Hey, have you heard from the hospital? How is she?” Reid asked the next morning as everyone met in the lobby.

“She’s trying to bribe nurses to let her leave so I’d say she’s doing much better.” Hotch said, causing everyone to laugh as they piled into the SUV.

The ride over to the hospital was fairly quick, everyone talking amongst themselves. Rossi sat up front with Hotch and after making sure everyone else was distracted he quietly spoke.

“So, you and Y/N,” He began, watching how Hotch tensed.

“It’s a bad idea, isn’t it?” Hotch asked, it was a thought that kept running through his head but he ignored it as best he could.

“I don’t think so.” Rossi said, causing Hotch to look at him for half a second before turning his attention back to the road. “I think the two of you are professional enough to make sure it doesn’t affect your work. You like her, Hotch, you have for a long time and she likes you. You both deserve to be happy.” Rossi said sincerely just as they pulled up to the hospital.

As everyone else got out, Hotch turned to Rossi and just looked at him for a moment.

“Thank you.” He said. He really needed to hear that it was ok and he trusted Rossi to tell him the truth no matter how much it hurt.

-

“How is she?” Emily asked as the doctor walked up to the group.

“She’s tough. Though there was a lot of blood, the wounds themselves aren’t a cause for concern. We’re going to get her some medication and then you can take her with you.” The team all let out a collective sigh of relief at the news.

“Hey baby girl.” Morgan greeted as he walked over to you, placing a kiss on your head. “How you doing today?”

“Hey,” you grinned up at him, “I feel pretty good, all things considered.” You told him honestly. Naturally your wounds hurt but the medication was working great.

Your eyes drifted to Hotch, looking for any signs of regret. You had a feeling that a night alone might make him realise all the ways this could blow up in your faces but thankfully he shot you a small, barely there smile letting you know everything was alright.

-

Being back in your own bed was a blessing you would never take for granted again. Though it was made better by the fact Hotch was here, sitting next to you as he adjusted the covers around you.

“You’ll shout me if you need me, right?” He asked. You hadn’t wanted to be alone tonight and Hotch had been worrying over you since you were discharged from the hospital. Now that the medicine was starting to wear off and the ones prescribed to you weren’t as strong you were starting to feel the pain and Hotch had offered to come home with you just to make sure you were ok. He insisted on sleeping in the guest room of your apartment which made you smile.

“I promise.” You assured him, smiling as he leaned down to kiss your forehead.

“Ok, I’ll let you get some sleep. Goodnight sweetheart.” He whispered, squeezing your hand twice before he headed out of the room. You watched as he paused in the doorway, a smile on his face as he looked back at you.

“Goodnight Aaron.”