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Losing You, It's Not An Option

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Prompt - 'The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair.’

Notes - This is my first time writing for Hotch so if it’s a little ooc, I do apologise.

It had been a rough case, three missing kids turned up dead before the FBI had been called in and another one missing for over ten hours. You had fourteen hours to figure out where this kid was before the chances of her being found alive were gone.

The plane ride over seemed to drag, nobody said anything after being briefed on the case, all too absorbed in reading through the files, thoughts and theories running through everyone’s head a mile a minute.

This was a particularly tough case for you considering the last time you’d had a case involving a kid they had died just as you burst through the door.

If only you’d been faster then that kid would still be alive.

With a sigh, you scrubbed at your face before looking back down at the folder, missing the look of concern Hotch threw your way.

“Y/L/N, Reid, you’re with me at the latest crime scene. Rossi, Prentiss, JJ, you head over to the station, the family of the missing girl should already be there.” Hotch said as everyone got off the jet and into two separate SUV’s.

There wasn’t much at the crime scene at this point, nothing that gave you any clues and everyone was painfully aware of the countdown.

-

Around the fifteen hour mark the team was ready to give a profile. You stood to the side as you watched Hotch describe how you were looking for a male in his early to mid 30’s who would have recently lost a five year old brunette girl. Everyone took turns giving bits of information out but you stayed silent, this time noticing the glances from Hotch.

“Y/L/N can I have a word?” Hotch asked once the briefing was over. You just nodded and followed him into an empty meeting room.

“Is everything ok?” He asked, closing the door.

“Everything’s fine.” You told him and judging by the look he shot you, you weren’t very convincing.

“Y/N,” He began but you cut him off with a shake of your head.

“There’s a little girl out there and we need to find her. We don’t have any time to waste.” And with that you brushed past him and back into the bullpen just in time for Spencer to announce that Garcia had found somebody who matched the profile perfectly.

“Noah Williams, aged 33. He, his wife and daughter were involved in a car accident, only he made it out alive. The wife was declared DOA but the daughter didn’t die until…” Here Spencer paused to skim through the details Garcia had sent over, “four days ago.”

“When the kidnappings started.” You said, causing him to nod.

“We know he doesn’t spend long with his victims due to the length of time from the girls being reported missing and then found, it’s usually around the twenty four hour mark. Isabelle has been missing for nearly sixteen hours now giving us an eight hour window to find her.” Spencer informed everybody and Hotch was quick to pull his phone out, Garcia answering on the first ring.

“Garcia, we need an address.” He said into the phone and you could hear typing noises as Garcia desperately tried to find an address.

“I have two.” She announced after a few moments. “One’s a cabin in the woods, pretty secluded, the other is a house not too far from you.”

“Rossi, Prentiss, Morgan you take the house. Y/L/N, Reid you’re with me at the cabin.” Hotch directed and people around you were quickly moving.

“You think he’ll be at the house?” Rossi asked, causing Hotch to sigh.

“Probably not but we can’t rule it out.” Everyone agreed and it wasn’t long before you were all in the SUV’s heading to two separate locations praying that the little girl was still alive.

-

“Reid, you and Y/L/N take the back, I’ll take the front.” Hotch said and everyone nodded before moving into position.

Just as Spencer opened the backdoor and headed inside you noticed a door that must have led down into the cellar. It was concealed pretty well but things looked out of place, like somebody didn’t have enough time to properly cover it up.

You turned around, not seeing Spencer, and lifted your gun higher as you walked over to the door. Thankfully it pulled open without any resistance and you slowly headed down the stairs.

As you came to the bottom of the stairs you heard crying causing you to turn around to see Isabelle, looking scared and bruised but thankfully alive, and the man Garcia had sent you a picture of.

He held a gun to the little girl’s head causing you to pause for a second.

“Come any closer and I’ll kill her.” He threatened, causing the girl to let out a whimper.

“Hey, it’s ok, nobody needs to get hurt.” You said as you lowered your gun. You knew Hotch would kill you for this but you just needed that girl alive. “Look I’ve put my gun away, I’m not here to hurt you Mr Williams, I promise I just want to help.”

“You can’t help me!” He shouted, the hand holding the gun shaking.

“I can, I promise I’ll do everything I can to help you but don’t let her parent’s go through what you went through when you lost Amelia.” You knew bringing up his daughter could go one of two ways and if it went south…you really needed him pointing that gun at you and not Isabelle.

“Don’t say her name!” He yelled and you couldn’t help but relax as the gun was finally pointed at you.

“It crushed you to lose her, she was your little girl and it’s not fair that she’s gone but you can’t take it out on these girls.” You tried to reason with him but you could see it in his eyes, you could see there was no talking him down.

You looked down at Isabelle and managed to discreetly signal to her to run up the stairs, out of the cellar, from there Hotch and Reid could help her.

You held your palm flat as Williams took a step closer to you, his attention no longer on the girl and with that you closed your fist and Isabelle was darting past you causing Williams to scream.

Before you even had a chance to draw your gun you felt a burning hot pain in your thigh and then another in your upper arm. As you hit the floor you heard the sound of people running down the stairs and more gun shots before your eyes slipped shut and your body went numb.

-

“What was she thinking?” Hotch asked as he paced in the private waiting room the team had been given.

“That last case with the kid really got to her, man. She blamed herself for his death.” Derek said from his seat.

“She’ll be ok, she always is.” Rossi said after a few moments of silence. Spencer really hoped that was true but he couldn’t get the image of you out of his mind.

Blood seemed to be pouring out of both the wounds alarmingly fast, Hotch hadn’t hesitated to shoot Williams before he was knelt on the floor next to you, uncaring about the blood staining his clothes. His hand cupped your cheek as he pleaded for you to wake up, desperately shouting for a medic.

It was safe to say Hotch had always had a soft spot for you though it had never been said it was obvious to everyone on the team, except of course for you. Every time someone teased you about it you just smiled and shook your head.

The image of Hotch so emotional as he held your unconscious body against his chest was one that wouldn’t leave his mind for a long while.

Eventually a doctor came over and told them of your condition. You had lost a lot of blood, nearly flat lined as they operated on you, one of the bullets had shattered so it was a long process but thankfully you’d be fine.

“She’s waking up but she’s on a lot of medication right now so just take it easy with her.” The doctor advised as he led them to your room. Everyone thanked him before he left and Hotch turned to the team.

“I know you all want to see her but could I have a few moments alone?” He asked and nobody had it in them to deny that request, not when Hotch was looking more scared, more worried than they could ever recall.

“How you doing?” Hotch asked softly as he entered the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

“I’m ok.” You whispered, slowly opening your eyes and shooting him a small smile.

“Y/N,” Hotch began still talking softly as he pulled a chair close to your bed, “what you did today-” He started but you cut him off.

“Saved a little girl’s life.” You smiled, “I won’t apologize, if I could go back and do it all again, I wouldn’t change a damn thing.” You told him and were surprised to see him smile. It was a rare sight for you so you couldn’t help but savour the moment.

Ever since you’d started working at the FBI you’d always had a small crush on Hotch, never acting on it because he was your boss but it was always there. The rest of the team teased you about Hotch being soft on you but you knew there was no truth to it - though seeing him here, smiling at you had you hoping they could be right.

When Hotch took your hand in his, brushing his thumb against your knuckles you couldn’t help but stare down at the joined hands.

“I know you wouldn’t.” He said, the small smile still in place. “Y/N, I need you to be more careful though, you could have called for backup. Doing it alone got you hurt, you nearly died and losing you…it’s not an option.” Hotch said, the words surprising him as well as you.

You couldn’t help but stare at him for a moment, your eyebrows knitting together as you took in the words.

“Hotch,” You began, throat suddenly dry and you had no idea what you were going to say. Thankfully he cut you off.

“I can’t lose you, Y/N.” He admitted and every part of him was screaming to shut up, he was your boss, this wasn’t right but he’d almost lost you today, if the bullet had hit you a little more to the right you would have bled out. He couldn’t lose you. “I know it’s not appropriate, I know I’m your boss but I cannot lose you.” He repeated as he lifted your knuckles to his lips

Your eyes watered, Hotch was here with a confession you’d only dreamed of hearing.

God, you wished you weren’t high on pain meds right now.

“I don’t care that you’re my boss, I don’t care what people will say. I only want you, Aaron.” You whispered, causing him to let out a watery laugh.

“I’ve waited so long for you to say that.” He admitted quietly, making you blush. “You’re so beautiful.” He murmured.

“I just got shot, I look horrible,” you laughed, causing his eyes to brighten.

“You could never.” He said, his tone so painfully honest that all you could do was smile shyly at him, a soft blush covering your cheeks.

The two of you stayed silent for a moment before a knock on the door interrupted you as Derek poked his head around. You watched as his eyes almost immediately darted to your joined hands, a small grin on his face.

“Can we come in?” He asked looking at Hotch and then you, both of you nodded and pretty quickly everyone was settled in your room.

Hotch never let go of your hand.

-

“You can take the jet home, we’ll be fine here.” Hotch told everyone as they got back to the hotel that night. There was a sense of pride as everyone shook their heads no, wanting to wait until you were released so you could all head home together.

His team was truly amazing.

Alone in bed he had plenty of time to think of the conversation that took place between the two of you. There had always been something about you but he never focused on it, when you had first joined the team he was still married but after his divorce he started noticing you more.

It was true he had always been less strict with you but he was always able to brush it off until one day he realised he was falling for you. He didn’t know when it happened just that it did but he was your boss, it wasn’t allowed.

But seeing you in that hospital bed, looking so small attached to various different wires and monitors, watching as you bled out on the dirty floor of the cellar…rules be damned, he wasn’t going to waste any opportunities with you. Even if you told him you didn’t feel the same, at least he tried.

But somehow you did feel the same.

He was still trying to register that. How could someone like you, someone so young, so much potential, so much goodness, like someone like him, he was older, he was divorced, he had a kid.

With a sigh, he rolled over and closed his eyes.

You liked him.

He wouldn’t let a day go by where he wouldn’t show you how much he cared for you.

He couldn’t lose you, it wasn’t an option.

-

“Hey, have you heard from the hospital? How is she?” Reid asked the next morning as everyone met in the lobby.

“She’s trying to bribe nurses to let her leave so I’d say she’s doing much better.” Hotch said, causing everyone to laugh as they piled into the SUV.

The ride over to the hospital was fairly quick, everyone talking amongst themselves. Rossi sat up front with Hotch and after making sure everyone else was distracted he quietly spoke.

“So, you and Y/N,” He began, watching how Hotch tensed.

“It’s a bad idea, isn’t it?” Hotch asked, it was a thought that kept running through his head but he ignored it as best he could.

“I don’t think so.” Rossi said, causing Hotch to look at him for half a second before turning his attention back to the road. “I think the two of you are professional enough to make sure it doesn’t affect your work. You like her, Hotch, you have for a long time and she likes you. You both deserve to be happy.” Rossi said sincerely just as they pulled up to the hospital.

As everyone else got out, Hotch turned to Rossi and just looked at him for a moment.

“Thank you.” He said. He really needed to hear that it was ok and he trusted Rossi to tell him the truth no matter how much it hurt.

-

“How is she?” Emily asked as the doctor walked up to the group.

“She’s tough. Though there was a lot of blood, the wounds themselves aren’t a cause for concern. We’re going to get her some medication and then you can take her with you.” The team all let out a collective sigh of relief at the news.

“Hey baby girl.” Morgan greeted as he walked over to you, placing a kiss on your head. “How you doing today?”

“Hey,” you grinned up at him, “I feel pretty good, all things considered.” You told him honestly. Naturally your wounds hurt but the medication was working great.

Your eyes drifted to Hotch, looking for any signs of regret. You had a feeling that a night alone might make him realise all the ways this could blow up in your faces but thankfully he shot you a small, barely there smile letting you know everything was alright.

-

Being back in your own bed was a blessing you would never take for granted again. Though it was made better by the fact Hotch was here, sitting next to you as he adjusted the covers around you.

“You’ll shout me if you need me, right?” He asked. You hadn’t wanted to be alone tonight and Hotch had been worrying over you since you were discharged from the hospital. Now that the medicine was starting to wear off and the ones prescribed to you weren’t as strong you were starting to feel the pain and Hotch had offered to come home with you just to make sure you were ok. He insisted on sleeping in the guest room of your apartment which made you smile.

“I promise.” You assured him, smiling as he leaned down to kiss your forehead.

“Ok, I’ll let you get some sleep. Goodnight sweetheart.” He whispered, squeezing your hand twice before he headed out of the room. You watched as he paused in the doorway, a smile on his face as he looked back at you.

“Goodnight Aaron.”

Begin Again

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Prompt - ‘In a cafe, I watched it begin again.’

Dating Derek Morgan was...it was completely refreshing honestly. Never had a man treated you as well as he did, never made you feel so confident, so happy. Your last relationship lasted for a while, you were in love with the man but he treated you like you were nothing, every little thing you did was criticised, he made you feel so small.

After the relationship had finally ended you were ready to just be on your own and you lasted for a while, you got yourself an apartment, got promoted, everything was going great but you still felt terrible as a result of the constant belittling from your relationship.

Bumping into Derek Morgan had been completely random . He was working a local case and you just so happened to be tasked with dealing with the FBI when they showed up at your workplace asking questions about a colleague who had not long been fired. Derek had been his charming self and once the case was finished he came and found you to ask if you’d like to grab a coffee with him sometime.

You weren’t quite sure if you were ready to start dating again or not but there was something about Derek that made you say yes. The two of you exchanged numbers before he left, shooting you a grin as he did.

The two of you had agreed to meet at a cafe not too far away from you. You couldn’t remember the last time you were this excited, you were dressed up nice, wearing a pair of high heels. It had been a long time since you’d worn heels, Michael hadn’t liked it when you did and it was easier to do what he said to save another argument.

After your last relationship you fully expected every guy to be like him so you were shocked when you walked in and saw Derek sat at a table waiting for you. Your ex had always been late or even stood you up without letting you know, it was humiliating, so seeing Derek there on time took you back a bit.

The second he saw you he stood up, smiling as you made your way over to him.

“Hey,” He said, his smile widening, “You look gorgeous.” He told you before he was moving to pull your seat out for you.

You paused as you watched him, never having a guy help you into your seat like this. It was such a casual move and Derek hadn’t even known how nice that was but you did.

“Thank you.” You replied, trying to hide your blush.

From there the two of you had sat and talked for hours, it was incredible how easily you were able to relax around Derek. The two of you swapped stories, admittedly Derek’s were a lot more interesting what with working with the FBI and all but when you spoke he gave you his full attention, you couldn’t help but relax as each hour passed.

Watching Derek throw his head back with laughter, you couldn’t help but remember your last relationship and you couldn’t ever remember laughing like this with him. It was strange that Derek found your stories funny when he never did.

Even though you were relaxed, you knew you were still coming off a little shy and knew Derek had to have picked up on it. He never asked though but when the date was over Derek walked you back to your car you almost told him why you had been so shy. You almost brought him up but then Derek started talking about Christmas with his family, he told you the movies they watched every year and you couldn’t help but smile at him and in that moment any thoughts of your ex left your mind.

“I had a great time tonight,” Derek told you when you stopped at your car. “Can I take you out again sometime?” He asked.

There was no hesitation this time, you knew you wanted...knew you had to see Derek again. There was something about the man, the way you were able to relax and talk so openly with him, the way you were able to laugh and joke together. There was no fear of saying the wrong thing and being shouted at, there was nothing within you telling you to get in your car and drive away from him.

In fact every instinct was telling you that Derek was special, he could be trusted.

“I’d really like that.” You told him honestly, watching as he grinned at you before leaning down to kiss your cheek softly.

“Get home safe, pretty lady.” He said as he pulled away, looking at the blush decorating your cheeks and smiling softly at you. “I’ll see you soon.”

“I hope so.” You smiled.

You hadn’t realised it then, how could you? It was a first date after all but that was the day you started falling in love with Derek Morgan. For eight long months you had thought all love ever did was break and burn and end and on a Wednesday afternoon, in a cafe, you watched it begin again.

To Hold You Close (It's All I Need)

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Prompt - ‘All's well that ends well to end up with you.’

It had been a long few days and Spencer was glad to be flying back home. The cases were always hardest when children were involved and the brutalness of this case made for a somber flight home. Spencer beat himself up for most of the flight back, if only he had pieced together the information faster…

“It’s not your fault, you know that don’t you?” Derek asked, pulling Spencer out of his head.

Spencer didn’t reply for a long moment but Derek didn’t push, he could see Spencer was mulling over the question.

“I read those journals, Morgan, I read each page and somehow missed the most vital clue that led us to that cabin. I should have picked up on it days ago.” Spencer told him, causing Derek to sigh.

“Spenc, we all read that part of the journal and anyone would have missed it. It wasn’t written for anyone but the unsub, you can’t beat yourself up over this, man. Those kids were gone long before we got there.”

“Elliot wasn’t.” Spencer replied blankly.

“Listen to me, kid, even if you picked up on the location on day one that kid, he still would’ve died. Brown was too far gone and he would’ve killed that kid before any of us had a chance to shoot him. This was not your fault. I need you to hear that.” Derek told him, leaning forward in his seat as he spoke.

Spencer knew that what Derek was saying was true, the man was having one of the worst psychotic breaks the team had seen for a long time. Killing the boys was the only agenda and he wouldn’t have let himself be taken down without making sure Elliot was dead too.

“Yeah,” Spencer sighed, “I hear you, it’s just hard sometimes.”

“Trust me, kid, I know.” Derek agreed. There was always going to be those cases that haunted you more so than others, this one happened to be Spencer’s. “You did good today.”

From there the conversation turned lighter, Derek trying to keep Spencer from getting too lost in his thoughts and it wasn’t long before the jet had landed and everyone made their way upstairs to get started on the paperwork.

-

“Anyone up for drinks?” Emily said as everyone was getting ready to leave, it was well into night time by now and all Spencer wanted to do was go home.

“Count me in.” Derek said as he swung his jacket over his shoulder. Everyone else confirmed they could use a drink after this case.

“Reid, you coming?” Rossi asked, frowning in concern as Spencer shook his head no.

“No thanks, I think I’m just going to head home for the night but you guys have fun.” He told them. He missed the looks of concern shot across the group as they entered the elevator.

“Reid, a word before you leave.” Hotch said, gesturing for everyone else to go ahead as he walked Spencer to his car. “How are you feeling? I know that case was tough.”

“I’m fine,” Spencer said though it didn’t sound too convincing considering the look Hotch gave him, “I know there was nothing that could have stopped Brown from killing the boy but a part of me just keeps wondering, you know, what if I hadn’t missed it? Would he still be alive?”

“We’ve dealt with a lot of cases, a lot of people suffering from psychotic breaks and from my experience I honestly don’t believe the outcome to this case would have been any different even if the circumstances changed. I think Brown was too overwhelmed by his own past and his anger and I think he would have killed that boy even if we found him earlier.” Spencer nodded along as he listened to Hotch and like with Derek, he knew that what was being said was most likely true but still couldn’t shake the what if’s.

“I know, sir, logically I know that but…” Here Spencer paused, not entirely sure how to put into words how he felt but ultimately he didn’t have to because Hotch rested his hand on Spencer’s shoulder and gave it a firm squeeze.

“I know.” Hotch said in understanding. “Are you sure you don’t want to come tonight, it might help.”

“No thank you.” Spencer told him.

“What about Y/N? Maybe you could go and see her, she gave you a key to her apartment, didn’t she?” Hotch asked but he remembered the conversation vividly as Spencer showed them the key with slight confusion.

“You don’t think she’d mind me showing up now?” Spencer asked, Hotch taking note of how Spencer visibly brightened.

-

You had been dating Spencer for eleven months now, the two of you meeting by chance one day at a bookstore. It was a complete cliche, Spencer had bumped into you causing you to drop your books and your drink. Spencer insisted on buying you a new drink and upon seeing your books, he couldn’t help but strike up a conversation about them when he recognised them as some of his favourites.

The two of you had stayed in the cafe for hours, the conversation starting with books and then moving onto hobbies, then your jobs and before either of you realised it hours had passed. With flushed cheeks and a shy exchange the two of you left with each other's phone number and a promise to meet again soon.

From there the rest was history.

You had to admit it was hard at the beginning dating somebody who worked for the FBI, a new state every week, not knowing if the next phone call was going to be someone informing you something had happened to Spencer but eventually it became a little less daunting.

-

A few months into the relationship you were introduced to Spencer’s friends. You had met JJ first, immediately getting on with the woman who you seemed to click with straight away. The two of you spoke regularly and even hung out alone together.

From there you had met Penelope and Emily and then Derek. They all took great pleasure in teasing Spencer but also made sure you were included, each getting to know you and you them.

That only left Hotch and Rossi.

For some reason Spencer was nervous to introduce you to Hotch though he wouldn’t ever admit it. He spoke with you one night about how he wanted to introduce the two of you but wasn’t sure how to and you suggested that you could meet Spencer for lunch at work and he immediately agreed.

When you walked in the others were all focused on their work, each typing away or sorting through the stacks of files scattered around. Hotch was closest to you and looked up as you entered the room hesitantly. You’d never been here before and you were more nervous than you thought you’d be.

“Can I help you?” He asked, looking at the badge that identified you as a visitor.

“Um, hi, I’m here for Spencer?” You said, cursing yourself for how nervous you sounded.

“And you are?” The man asked but before you could answer you heard Spencer calling your name. You relaxed as you turned to see him walking over to you.

You watched as he looked from the man to you before clearing his throat.

“Um, Hotch this is Y/F/N Y/L/N my girlfriend.” He introduced you and you couldn’t help but smile at how flustered he was. “Y/N, this is Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner.”

“It’s nice to meet you, sir.” You said, shaking the hand he held out to you.

“Please call me Aaron. It’s nice to meet you too. I wasn’t aware Spencer had a girlfriend.” Hotch said, watching as Spencer flushed even more.

“It’s only been a few months.” You explained to him, causing the man to nod.

The three of you continued your conversation before you were interrupted by JJ.

“I’m sorry, sir, but we have a case. Four dead bodies have turned up so far with another reported missing two hours ago, if the unsub follows the same pattern we have eight hours before the missing woman shows up dead and it’s a two hour flight so we have to leave now.” JJ explained as she handed files out to everybody.

You watched as Spencer looked down at the file before looking back at you apologetically. Everyone had already begun moving, grabbing their belongings.

“I’m so sorry.” He said, feeling a warmth in his chest as you just smiled at him.

“Go catch the bad guy.”

You watched Spencer grab his bag and the team and you entered the elevator. It was silent, everyone’s thoughts on the case at hand but you were more focused on Spencer as he linked your fingers together, squeezing your hand softly as he did.

As the team waited for a car to be brought up front, Spencer turned to you.

“I really am sorry.” He said again but you had just shook your head.

“I promise it’s fine, just...just come home safe.” You told him, biting your lip as you looked at the file in his hand.

Spencer immediately pulled you into a tight embrace and you wrapped your arms around his waist, holding him just as tightly.

“Spenc,” Morgan said, pulling Spencer's attention away from you and to the car the others were now piling into.

Spencer nodded before cupping your cheek and pulling you into a soft kiss.

“I’ll see you soon.” He whispered as he pulled away.

“I’ll be counting down the days.” You told him and with that he climbed into the car and closed the door.

“We’ll make sure he’s safe.” Somebody said, causing you to jump slightly. A man you hadn’t met stood next to the passenger door, looking at you with a smile. “I’m David Rossi by the way.” He said, leaning forward to shake your hand.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N and thank you.” You said with a shaky smile.

He nodded at you, shooting you a comforting smile before he was in the car and it was driving away.

-

“She gave you a key didn’t she?” Hotch said, a ghost of a smile on his lips as Spencer nodded thoughtfully.

“Thank you, Hotch.” Spencer said, smiling at Hotch who just squeezed the younger man's arm once more before pulling away.

“Have a good night, Reid.”

“You too.” Spencer smiled and it didn’t take him long to climb into the car and begin his drive.

-

It was just past two when Spencer arrived at your apartment. He knew you’d be asleep so tried to be as silent as possible as he slid the key into the lock. This wasn’t the first time he’d used the key but it was the first time he hadn’t checked with you beforehand.

As he expected the apartment was completely dark and so he took his time making his way to your bedroom, not wanting to trip on anything and wake you up.

He hadn’t had a chance to speak to you today and there had only been time for quick texts during this case, time being of the essence when it came to missing children. He had missed you more than he could say.

The two of you hadn’t said ‘I love you’ to each other yet but Spencer had known for a long time now that he loved you, you were it for him. He couldn’t imagine anyone else he would rather spend his life with.

Spencer gently pushed your door open, wincing as it creaked slightly but thankfully you didn’t stir. He made fast work of changing his clothes, he swore you had more of his clothes in your apartment than were at his own.

It wasn’t long before he was crawling into bed with you, the tiredness hitting him all at once as the blanket wrapped around him. Looking at you though, so beautiful even as you slept, he felt his heart swell. Even after all the bad he’d seen, even after this case you managed to make him feel better.

The stress lessened as he took you in his arms, holding you close. He smiled as you cuddled further into him, your hand clenching the shirt he wore.

Spencer leaned down and kissed your forehead, letting his lips linger there for a moment or two before he pulled away.

“I love you so much.” He couldn’t help but confess into the dark, his voice a whisper, so quiet that despite the closeness you didn’t stir but it felt good to say it out loud.

It wasn’t long before Spencer fell asleep, you in his arms, feeling better than he had for days.

It's Going To Be You

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Prompt - I knew I did from that first moment we met. It was…not love at first sight exactly, but - familiarity. Like: oh, hello, it’s you. It’s going to be you.

—————————————————–

Spencer Reid knew from the moment he laid eyes on you that you were something else, he could tell from one glance that you would change his life. No words needed to be exchanged for the man to be completely and utterly taken by you. He watched as you walked through the door, though your head was held high, shoulders pushed back giving the impression of complete confidence, he saw the way you fiddled with the strap of your bag with one hand. When he looked at your other hand he could see your forefinger picking at your thumb, clearly a nervous habit. He watched as you looked around the room, watched as Rossi made his way over to you, guiding you over to Hotch’s office with a smile.

“Down, pretty boy.” Derek grinned as Spencer startled, his head snapping around to face Derek just as you entered Hotch’s office. “I’ve never seen that look on your face and you don’t even know her name.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Spencer replied, cringing at how unconvincing he sounded.

He turned away from Derek and tried to focus on his paperwork but he could stop his eyes from straying over to the closed office door every few minutes much to Derek and Rossi’s amusement.

“Who is she anyway?” Derek asked.

“She’s lucky number ten,” Rossi told them, smothering a smile as Spencer looked over, “who knew finding another agent would be so difficult.”

“Wait,” another voice interrupted, “there’s a new person here? Is she nice? Why is that always my first question?” The group laughed as Penelope quizzed Rossi.

“Listen, I know as much as you people.” He said and before anyone else could speak Penelope was being handed a folder causing them all to groan.

-

“Agent Hotchner?” You asked as you were granted access to the office.

Hotch stood as you walked in, moving around his desk to hold a hand out to you.

“Yes and you’re Y/F/N Y/L/N, I presume?” He asked, smiling slightly at you as you nodded, still fiddling with your bag. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, please have a seat.”

“Thank you sir.” You smiled, taking a seat in the offered chair watching as he made his way back behind his desk.

“Your supervisor spoke very highly of you when I spoke with him, your success rate is impressive.” Hotch praised, glancing down at the file in front of him. “Your latest case seemed rather difficult, are you sure you’re ready to be back in the field again?”

“I passed all my psychiatric exams, I was cleared to return.” You told him stiffly.

“I’m aware of your results, I just want to be sure you’re ready. Infiltrating yourself into the life of Douglas Miller couldn’t have been an easy feat.” Hotch watched as a look of satisfaction took over your face.

“I’m ready, sir.” You told him, relaxing slightly. “It was a tough case, I’ll be the first to admit that seeing what I saw had an impact but I can do this.”

Hotch smiled at you before closing the folder.

“I believe you,” he said, “I think you’ll be a valuable addition to this team.”

The words were what you were hoping to hear, you’d wanted a job with the BAU for longer than you could remember but you paused. Surely it wasn’t that easy, right?

“Wait? That’s it?” You asked.

“That’s it.” Hotch confirmed, fighting back a smile at your expression.

“But- but I’ve been here less than five minutes.” You countered back, there were so many emotions going on within you that you felt slightly overwhelmed.

“Y/N, ever since your name was put forward I looked into your work and I was impressed. Your skills at undercover work are far above what I’ve seen in a long time, that alone would be an incredibly useful assest to the team but on top of that your ability to connect and empathise with unsubs, fast thinking and your profiling skills- trust me, you deserve this job and I have complete faith in you.” Hotch’s words had left you speechless, you had no clue how to respond but thankfully you didn’t have to as the door was pushed open and both you and Hotch turned to look at the brightly dressed woman in the doorway.

“I’m sorry to interrupt sir but we have a case.” The woman said and Hotch stood gesturing for you to follow.

“You have a to go bag?” He asked as you both walked out the door.

“Yes sir.” You nodded, still baffled by how well things had gone.

“Good, welcome to the team Y/L/N.”

-

“Everyone, this is SSA Y/F/N Y/L/N. I’m sure proper introductions can be made later.” Hotch said as the two of you entered the room before gesturing to Garcia that she could begin.

“Ok, yes, so, we have five bodies so far found in Wyoming. The first two bodies were hidden amongst some trees close to firehole bay. The ME presumes that the time of death was mostly likely a week ago but we should have full confirmation when you arrive. The victims, who we haven’t been able to identify yet, but I am working on it, were stripped completely and the wounds, that are in your files because I so do not need to see that, show heavy signs of torture. ” Garcia informed you all.

“The next body was a single male, again stripped and tortured and the ME says this death is most likely four to five days old. This body was found a few miles away from Basin Bay Point campsite.”

“Wait a second,” somebody interrupted, causing you to turn your head. There sat a man, younger than the rest of the team, he was…how you had missed him you didn’t know but now you felt like you couldn’t look away. “If I’m not mistaken those places are roughly twenty miles from each other at walking distance.”

“And driving distance?” An older man asked.

“I don’t think there is a way to drive to Basin Bay Point, especially not to where the body was left.” The younger man replied, looking down at the folder he was given with a frown.

“I’ll have a map ready for you on the plane.” Penelope assured him before continuing. “Now, the next two bodies were the most recent, ME says they were killed a day or two ago and these victims we have been able to identify as Taylor Gomez and her boyfriend Jack Gaskarth.” Penelope said as she brought their pictures up. “They were never reported missing because they had told friends and family they were going camping, which checks out because their bodies were found three miles away from Lewis Lake campground. They show the same wounds as the other vics.” Garcia explained.

You grimaced as you looked down at the tablet Hotch had passed you as you saw a young man and woman, naked with slices all across their bodies, as well as deep bruising to the neck.

“What was the CoD, Garcia?” The younger man spoke up again.

“ME still needs to run a full examination but her best bet is that it was asphyxiation.” She told him with a frown.

“That makes sense, there isn’t a lot of blood or scabbing which suggests they were done post mortem.”

“So what,” you spoke up, pausing for a moment when everyone turned to you, “the unsub blitz attacks the victims and kills them before torturing them? What’s the point in that?”

“It could be a number of things actually. Perhaps it’s not about the kills for him but more to do with the fascination of the human body, we’ve seen it before where curiosity leads to this kind of attack. It could also be that he has to kill, he has a compulsion to kill and once he’s given into that compulsion he gets to fulfil other urges. If I had to guess I’d say the victims are victims of opportunity-” The younger man rambled, his hands gesturing in front of him as he spoke causing you to smile.

“Because there is no set pattern, he crosses race and gender lines and there’s no secondary location.” You cut off the other man who looked at you with a grin.

“Exactly, the area is so isolated that he can get away with quick and easy killings but because it doesn’t seem like there’s a secondary location yet we have to presume that the torture is a means to satisfy himself when he can’t hold his victims hostage.”

“It’s a long flight and this unsub doesn’t appear to be slowing down. Wheels up in fifteen.” Hotch said as he stood up, everyone was quick to follow until it was just you and the guy you had spoken to left.

“Hi.” He said, causing you to turn around with a smile.

“Hi.”

“I’m Spencer, Spencer Reid.” He introduced himself.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N, nice to meet you.” You replied, reaching out your hand to shake his, your eyebrows pulling together slightly as he shook his head.

“Sorry, I don’t um,” He said, causing you to drop your hand and nod understandingly, “it’s nothing against you, just…germs.” He trailed off, berating himself in his head.

“No problem.” You smiled again, god that smile. Spencer felt his heart race.

“Congratulations on joining the team.” He praised as the two of you walked out of the round table room.

“Thank you, I’ve wanted this for so long.” He watched as the smile fell from your face before you shook your head slightly.

“Is everything ok?” He asked, understanding the nerves. He couldn’t help but glance down, almost smiling as he saw you picking at your thumb.

“Yeah, I’m just, what if I mess up?” You couldn’t help but ask. After wanting this job for as long as you had, all the hard nights and long days spent training you were finally here and you’d be damned if you screwed everything up.

“You won’t, Hotch wouldn’t have hired you if he didn’t think you were good enough, trust me. I think you’ll be amazing.” He told you, flushing slightly at his own words and the soft smile that replaced the frown on your face.

“Thank you Spencer.” You replied softly and before he could respond the rest of the team was calling for the two of you to head to the air strip.

-

On the plane you were properly introduced to everyone as you took a seat next to Spencer, sitting opposite Hotch and Rossi. On the table in front of you Spencer had both a map of the US and a smaller map of Wyoming. You watched his fingers trace invisible lines as his eyebrows knitted together.

You were trying not to stare, really you were, but there was just something about the man that made you want to get to know him.

Thankfully before anyone noticed your eyes glancing at Spencer every few moments, the man himself spoke.

“Guys, if you map out where the five victims were found,” Spencer began, circling three places on the map as he did, “it looks like the victims might have been hiking the continental divide trail.”

“Pretty boy, isn’t that trail like thousands of miles long?” Morgan asked, watching as Spencer nodded, pushing the little map of Wyoming out of the way for a moment and drawing a line down the map of the US.

“This is the continental divide trail, it’s 3,300 miles long and it’s actually quite difficult to hike. These people had to have been exceptionally fit and healthy which further backs up the theory that these were blitz attacks. You can go days without seeing other people when hiking the trail and most hikers have to give up because of lack of supplies or needing urgent medical care from injuries and illnesses they attract. A part of the Wyoming part of the trail includes a 120 mile stretch of desert with water sources few and far between.” Spencer rambled and you couldn’t help the soft smile, though you did try to hide it behind your hand, glancing away from Rossi when you locked eyes with him and he raised an eyebrow at you.

“So we have a serial killer and 3,300 miles of potential hunting grounds?” JJ asked.

“So far he seems to be focusing on Wyoming, which narrows the geographic profile down to…’ Spencer paused as he pulled the Wyoming map closer to him, “550 miles.”

“I hope you all brought your hiking boots.” Rossi said as groans filled the jet.

“Hello my crime fighters.” Garcia’s voice sounded through the speakers. “Hotch, the families of the latest two victims are at the station waiting for you.”

“Thank you Garcia,” Hotch replied before turning to the team. “JJ, I want you to come with me to the station and help interview the families. We also need to get ahead of the media on this before they start glorifying the unsub. Reid, since the geographic profile is mostly established, I want you to take Y/L/N and head to the latest crime scene. Dave and Morgan, the two of you head to the second crime scene.”

You and Spencer both shared a look at the news you were travelling to a crime scene that couldn’t be driven too. Whilst you managed to pass the FBI’s training and fitness tests you weren’t exactly athletically inclined and seeing from the look Spencer was giving you neither was he.

Judging from the chuckles that filled the plane the others had come to the same conclusion that you and Spencer were not going to recover from this trip.

-

You had driven as close to the crime scene as you could get, which was thankfully closer than the one Morgan and Rossi had to go to. It was still a hell of a hike to get to where the unsub had dumped the bodies.

“Ok, ok,” Spencer panted, cheeks flushed from the heat. “Let’s take a break.”

“Please.” You were quick to agree and the two of you sat down heavily on a fallen tree trunk. You had all been warned that you needed supplies, even for a short hike. So you had both been sent out with backpacks filled with water bottles and food. There were other supplies like maps, compasses and first aid kits that you were hoping you wouldn’t have to use. Thankfully you had been paired with the man with the eidetic memory because you couldn’t read a map to save your life.

After the two of you gulped down some water and caught your breath Spencer spoke up.

“Why the BAU?” He asked suddenly, causing you to look up in confusion.

“Sorry?” You replied.

“You said you had wanted to join the BAU for a long time, why?” He asked again, not pushing you when you paused.

It wasn’t a secret what had happened to your family, Spencer could easily find the information out if he wanted to but you wanted to be the one to tell him. It wasn’t a story you liked sharing with people but something about Spencer made you feel…safe.

“When I was a kid there was a serial killer but he was in the next state over and we were from a small town so nobody thought to worry and after a while things went quiet so everyone just assumed he stopped, you know? Anyway, one day I went to my friend’s house, it was summer and I was always out with my friends. I was there for a few hours but I was always home in time for dinner except for this day, I ended up losing track of time and headed home an hour late. When I got home, my momma was there in the kitchen. She was covered in blood and I just screamed. The rest of my family didn’t make it either. When the police came they said the markings were the same as the victims from the next state over.” You told him, not pausing for breath as you rushed through the story. You watched as his expression fell, his sympathy written on his face.

“I’m so sorry.” He told you and you could hear the sincerity in his tone. You gave him a small smile before continuing.

“I could just never understand why. The thing that kept me up at night was that question: why? Why them? Why did he come here? Why wasn’t I home? Why did I deserve to live? I started researching and somehow came across an article about the BAU, from there I knew I wanted to work there.”

“Most people wouldn’t be able to come back from something like that, especially at such a young age.” Spencer said, causing you to glance over at him. “They’d be so proud of you.”

You couldn’t help but let out what sounded like a chuckle and a sob at those words, causing Spencer’s eyes to widen in fear he had upset you further but then you smile brightly and he couldn’t help but smile back.

“I like to think so.” You said softly. “You ready to continue?” You asked, chuckling as he groaned before standing up.

“I hate Hotch.” Was the grumbled response and the laugh he received in return made every sore bone and the aching feet worth it.

-

“We know that this unsub is a physically fit white male in his mid to late thirties.” Hotch began.

“Looking at the geographical pattern it’s safe to assume that he too is hiking the Continental Divide Trail in search of victims who are isolated from the rest of civilization. He also has no problems taking down two victims.” Spencer continued.

“The period in between kills is lessening so we should expect to find another body soon, have as many officers as possible on the rest of the trail.” You picked up.

“Considering the last kill was two days ago, the average person could walk up to 30 miles a day on normal terrain but we have to consider that the terrain out there is harsh so lets say he walks 20 miles a day that gives up a 40 mile radius he could be in. He is guaranteed to stay on the continental divide trail so stop every male you see.” Spencer told the LEO’s and after some more information was shared everyone headed off in different directions, the BAU members heading into the room they had been given to work in.

“Y/N,” Hotch said, causing everyone to look over at you.

“Yes sir?” You asked, looking up from your laptop.

“You’re probably the most skilled undercover agent in this room,” He said, causing your cheeks to flush and Spencer couldn’t help but smile. “I know this isn’t exactly the type of case you’d usually be assigned but perhaps if we send you out there we have a better chance of catching him. This man is impulsive, if he sees you he won’t be able to control himself.” Hotch explained, ignoring the questioning looks he was getting from most of the team.

You, however, relaxed, thankful that you hadn’t done something wrong. Undercover work was easy, you were comfortable with it, you knew you were good at it. Obviously you weren’t as confident at this part of the job yet, how could you be on your first case, but undercover work? That was your area of expertise.

“Of course sir.” You agreed easily before remembering how fun the small hike to the last crime scene was…your body would not thank you for signing up for a much longer hike.

“Hotch, are you sure that’s a good idea?” Morgan spoke up causing you to frown. Sure they didn’t know you yet but surely your record spoke for itself. “No offence to you,” he said quickly as he turned to you, “it’s just-“

But before he could finish Hotch cut him off, “I have full faith in Y/L/N’s abilities.”

You couldn’t help feeling a swell of pride at Hotch’s words, a man who you looked up to, a man who barely knew you but was trusting you with so much already. You locked eyes with Spencer who smiled at you reassuringly.

“I’m not doubting the kid’s abilities,” Morgan continued, missing the way you rolled your eyes at being called a kid. “I’m just saying maybe don’t send her in on her own on her first case.”

“I’ll go with her.” Spencer spoke up before Hotch could argue back.

Your eyes widened at Spencer’s offer, he did just as well as you did on your first outing and now he was offering to put himself through hours more of that for what?

“Are you ok with that, Y/N?” Hotch asked you.

You didn’t even hesitate to nod, more than happy for the opportunity to spend time with Spencer Reid.

-

“We’ll be close by the whole time,” Hotch told you as he passed you your backpack filled with supplies, “the second we hear something, we’ll be there.” He assured you and you couldn’t help but smile at his concern.

“I’ll be fine, sir. This is actually the part of the job I’m good at.” You laughed, watching as his lip twitched upwards.

“You’ve been a great help in coming up with a profile too.” He assured you and before you could say anything the rest of the team was flooding in.

The plan for you and Spencer to hike up to a specific spot that Spencer had managed to pinpoint the unsub at and set up camp there. From there you would wait and hope for the unsub to appear. The man was impulsive and his need to kill would be overwhelming by now. The two of you were wired up so that if the unsub appeared the rest of the team could step in and help with the arrest.

You and Spencer were dropped off half an hour away from your campsite just so that if the unsub was around he wouldn’t suspect anything.

The walk was mostly silent, both you and Spencer focusing on not breaking an ankle on the uneven terrain when Spencer finally spoke up.

“Morgan didn’t mean anything insulting.” He told you, causing you to pause before shrugging your shoulders and continuing. When you stayed silent Spencer continued, “he’s just protective but sometimes he isn’t really good at showing it and it comes across…”

“It comes across like he thinks I can’t do my job despite this being my forte.” You finished with a huff before sighing. “I’m sorry, I just…you can’t imagine how many times a male colleague has said I can’t do something and then a supervisor has agreed, you don’t understand how hard I have to fight to be given assignments and not have somebody constantly berating me.” You ranted.

“People look at me like I’m a child. When I first joined the BAU nobody would take me seriously, without Gideon I don’t know what would have happened.” Spencer told you quietly, causing you to frown.

“So you can understand why it’s so frustrating that someone who doesn’t know me didn’t even want to give me a chance.” You replied, causing him to nod sadly. ‘I know he probably didn’t mean anything but…”

“You’ve heard that your entire career.” Spencer finished.

“Hotch was the first person to give me a chance without any hesitation.” You told him softly, watching as he smiled at that. “This should be close enough.” You said as you looked around, the place looked similar to the image Spencer had shown the team.

“Please tell me you know how to put a tent up.” You said, watching as his face twisted.

“I know the theory?” The way his response sounded like a question made you smile as you pulled poles and material out of a bag. The two of you staring down at the mess with matching expressions of confusion.

“Now would be a really good time for the unsub to attack.” He muttered, causing you to laugh loudly. Spencer couldn’t help but grin over at you, your cheeks flushing as you caught the expression.

It took longer than either you or Spencer were willing to admit to put the tent up, despite the fact that it wouldn’t get used, you had to make it look like the pair of you were really camping. There was a lot of grumbling, many curse words and a cut or two.

There was also a lot of laughter coming from the comms in your ears causing both you and Spencer to roll your eyes.

Once the tent was up, Spencer lay a blanket down outside of it and sat down, gesturing for you to do the same. Miraculously the two of you got a fire started and as the sun set and the night time air chilled you were thankful for it.

“I don’t camp but I guess I can see the appeal.” Spencer told you as he titled his head back to look up at the stars. You glanced up too, the sky wasn’t totally black yet, more of an inky blue colour and you could see every star on the cloudless night.

It was beautiful and yet you still found your gaze falling back on Spencer.

“Yeah, me too.” You replied softly, your voice quiet so as not to break the peacefulness around you.

Somehow the two of you ended up laying down and looking up at the sky, you had a smile on your face that refused to move as Spencer’s hushed voice told you facts about stars.

“I’m glad you’re on the team.” Spencer whispered after a long pause of silence. It took you a moment to register his words before you turned your head, coming face to face with the man.

“Me too.” You whispered back, meaning the words with your entire being.

Just as Spencer went to say something you heard a rustle in the bushes and locked eyes with Spencer who nodded.

The two of you waited, not waiting to disrupt the operation if it just turned out to be an animal, but as you pushed yourself up on your elbow and discreetly looked around you saw a faint outline of a man. He was hidden behind a tree but he was watching the two of you.

“The hike up here was exactly what we needed.” You told Spencer and through the comms you heard the team moving out.

“You’re right.” He played along, smiling up at you from his reclined position.

Before you knew what was happening Spencer had his gun out and the unsub grabbed you, placing you in front of him as a human shield. If someone asked you, you would never have been able to recall the events that led to you having a knife held to your neck.

You saw the panicked look in Spencer’s eyes but you couldn’t hear his thoughts, they were overwhelming. Thoughts of Maeve passed through his mind as he pleaded with anyone who would listen to let you be ok, he couldn’t lose you too. Hell, he’d only known you a few days and yet he knew you were special, he knew he had to have you in his life. If you died now…

“Just let her go.” Spencer said, keeping his gun trained on the man.

“I let her go, you ship me off to death row.” The man responded, his face close to your face, too close. The smell of his breath had you grimacing.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Spencer responded, not even thinking. He just needed to get you away.

“Spenc, what you doing kid?” He heard Morgan through his ear piece but he just shook his head before shooting you a reassuring smile, trying not to focus on the tears in your eyes or the blood on your neck.

“I’m listenin’.” The unsub replied after a moment of silence, gesturing for Spencer to continue.

“Let her go,” He said, lowering his gun, “I won’t arrest you. You can get a head start before anyone else gets here. Just let her go.” Spencer pleaded.

It was a tense few seconds in which Spencer never took his eyes off you, he hated to see that scared look in your eyes, the fear in them made Spencer ache.

“Let her go.” Spencer said once more and he let out a sigh of relief as you were pushed into his arms.

Just as the unsub ran to leave, you twisted around in Spencer’s arms and drew your own gun, shooting the unsub in the leg. The rest of the team ran in just as the man fell to the ground.

Spencer turned you around so that you were facing him, his hands on your shoulders.

“Are you ok?” He asked, Morgan and Hotch walking over whilst Rossi and JJ dealt with the man.

You didn’t respond with words, instead you wrapped your arms around Spencer. He didn’t hesitate to wrap his own around you, holding you close as you let the tears slid down your face.

You pulled away abruptly, rubbing your eyes as you did.

“Sorry, you don’t like to be touched and here I am-“ You said but Spencer just cut you off.

“It’s fine, really.” He assured you before his attention turned to your neck. The knife hadn’t pierced the skin too badly, there was a small bit of blood where the knife had nicked you when the unsub pressed a bit too hard.

“Are you ok?” He asked again, fingers on your jaw so that he could tilt your face and get a better look.

“Spencer, I’m fine.” You assured him but that didn’t stop him from getting you medical attention the moment you were back in the town.

Spencer watched as you squirmed away from the nurse seeing to you with a soft smile.

There was something about you that made him feel so free, like he could be himself and the thought of losing you…he didn’t want to think about it again.

“You like her.” Derek said as he came to stand next to the younger man.

“That’s ridiculous, I’ve known her for a few days.” Spencer shot back but he knew his friend was right.

“If she’s the right girl, a few days is all you need.” Was Derek’s reply before he walked away, leaving Spencer looking at you with a thoughtful look on his face.

-

The plane ride home was uneventful.

You took the seat next to Spencer again and watched him pull a book out. You couldn’t help but glance down at it, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion as you didn’t recognise the language.

“It’s Russian.” He told you quietly, not wanting to disturb anyone as they settled in for a long flight.

“You read Russian?” You asked just as quietly, watching as he smiled bashfully and shrugged before nodding. You glanced down at the pages again before letting out a small yawn. “Can you read to me?” You asked him, smiling as he nodded again.

“Of course,” He said and with that it wasn’t long before you fell asleep to the soothing sound of Spencer Reid.

-

“Ask her, man.” Morgan said as both he and Spencer watched you leave the office after finishing your paperwork. Spencer too was done and Morgan assured him he’d make sure Hotch received it.

There was only a brief moment of hesitation before Spencer snatched his satchel up and ran to the elevators, getting there just before they shut on you.

“Hey.” He greeted as he stepped in.

“Hi.” You smiled, brushing a piece of hair out of your face.

“I was wondering, I mean if you wanted to, of course you don’t have to, I was only suggesting but I’d really like it if you would,” Spencer rambled before cutting himself out with a groaning causing you to giggle.

“Are you asking me out?” You asked, cheeks flushing as you asked.

“I’m trying to,” he told you, “but I’m not very good at this.”

“Just ask.” You told him softly.

“Would you like to go out with me?” He asked after taking a deep and calming breath.

“I’d love to.” You grinned, thankful that the man had made a move. You wouldn’t have risked asking him on the chance that you were reading him wrong and he didn’t like you but thankfully he had taken it into his own hands.

“Good. Great. That, that’s great.” He repeated, a soft grin spreading across his face causing you to giggle as the doors opened.

The two of you walked out together and there was a moment of awkward silence before Spencer dipped his head down to kiss your cheek, making your blush even more prominent.

You looked so pretty when you blushed, Spencer thought.

“I’ll call you.” He promised.

“I hope so.” You replied before heading towards your car, when you turned around you saw Spencer still stood by the doors with a smile still on his face. You giggled to yourself but couldn’t stop smiling yourself if you tried.

Spencer Reid was something else and you couldn’t wait to learn everything about that wonderful man.

I Have Found You

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Aaron Hotchner Taglist - @braelyniskool, @canadailluminate, @filmsbyblair, @ready-4-spencie, @mrs-scottmccall, @j-cat, @cinderellacauseshebroke, @black-rose-29

Prompt - I have for the first time found what I can truly love. I have found you.

—————————————————–

You and Aaron had had a long week at work, each on separate cases but both equally as drained as the other. Your job saw you travelling to and from New York each day, working for one of the states best law firms, it was hard working your way up but you did it and now you were dealing with high profile cases day in and day out.

This case was particularly gruelling but it was finally finished and you had won. It was a small victory for the family but it was a victory nonetheless.

Aaron was working on his own case, he had been in Las Vegas for the past four days dealing with a serial killer who was targeting families. The unsub was organised, too organised, and more families were killed before they finally caught a break. From there it had been a matter of hours before they caught the man and the team was back on the jet.

Aaron finished up on the phone before dropping down into his seat beside Rossi who raised an eyebrow at him.

“Short of an emergency we all have Friday and Monday off, I don’t want to see any of you for four days.” Aaron announced to the jet, smiling as it was filled with cheers and laughter.

“So, big plans?” Rossi asked, smirking at Aaron who just rolled his eyes.

“I plan on doing absolutely nothing.” Aaron replied with a smile, already thinking of how great it would be to spend a long weekend with you and Jack, it had been far too long. He had already spoken to you and upon hearing the good news of your case asked if you could get two days off and thanked god that you could.

“I hear you, man.” Derek spoke up from opposite Rossi. “Four whole days of nothing but me and my girl.”

“What about you, kid?” Rossi asked, looking at Spencer who sat opposite Aaron.

“There’s a film festival I really wanted to go to actually, it's showing a bunch of different films in their original language.” Spencer told him and the grin on his face was enough to stop any teasing.

“Have a good time, pretty boy.” Derek smiled back, ruffling the younger man's hair causing him to pout.

Aaron couldn’t help but smile at the scene but as much as he loved this family, he couldn’t wait to get back home to you and Jack.

-

“How hard can cupcakes be, right?” You asked Jack, who stood on a chair in front of the counter. The two of you were staring at the ingredients that were spread out, not knowing where to start. When you suggested Jack make something for Aaron you were thinking more along the lines of a picture but when the kid suggested cupcakes well…you really wanted cupcakes.

“Right.” Jack agreed, grinning up at you.

Turns out it was harder to make cupcakes than either of you thought.

Aaron walked into the house, smiling immediately as he heard Jack giggling madly. He was quick to follow the noise but stopped abruptly as he stared into the kitchen.

“Daddy!” Jack yelled, quickly scrambling off the chair and throwing himself at Aaron who caught him and lifted him with ease despite the cupcake mixture that stuck to his clothes, face and hair.

“Hey buddy,” He grinned, turning his attention to you. There you stood, cupcake mix splatter on your face, in your hair and on your shirt. You looked dejected as you held an electric mixer, clearly the culprit of the cupcake explosion. “It looks like you and Y/N are having fun.” He said with a laugh, watching how you pouted up at him.

“We were gonna make cupcakes for you, daddy, but Y/N put it on too high.” Jack informed Aaron, giggling madly as he did.

“I didn’t know!” You defended, there was a reason you weren’t trusted in the kitchen.

Aaron’s smile grew and he couldn’t wait any longer to move closer to you, the hand that didn’t hold Jack caressed your cheek and he brought you in for a soft kiss. It didn’t last long, how could it with Jack laughing and making kissing noises, but the two of you pulled away with matching, love struck smiles before you and Jack began laughing together at the cupcake batter that was now perched on Aaron’s nose.

He rolled his eyes but couldn’t fight back the smile.

“Alright, alright,” he said, gaining both of your attention, “how about you two get cleaned up and we can all go out for dinner and then get some cupcakes, hm? That sound good?” He asked Jack who nodded with a grin and squirmed for Aaron to put him down. Once he did, Jack shot off to his bedroom and Aaron turned his attention to you.

“You can’t of thought that was a good idea.” He said as he wrapped his arms around your waist, leaning in to steal another kiss.

“The kid said cupcakes, who was I to say no?” You responded when he pulled away, giggling as he trailed kisses to your jaw and then peppered them down your neck.

Your eyes closed as you tilted your head back, giving the man more access and you couldn’t help but whine as he pulled away. The whine quickly turned into a laugh as he leaned closer and licked a blob of batter that had stuck to your neck.

“Go clean up, baby.” He said before kissing your head and untangling himself from you.

You and Jack were quick to clean yourselves up and soon you were all out the door and heading to a restaurant that you often frequented when you had Jack.

-

It felt like forever since you had been out with the Hotchner boys and you enjoyed every minute of it, no annoying work calls pulling one of you away, no looming threat of Aaron being called to a different state. No, just you, Aaron and Jack going out together, eating good food, catching up with each other properly.

It was wonderful.

“Cupcakes now daddy?” Jack asked as the waitress cleared the plates.

“Yeah, cupcakes now daddy?” You echoed with a smirk watching as Aaron playfully glared at you.

“Sure thing buddy,” He said to Jack, causing you to let out a quiet laugh. “Pick which one you want.”

Aaron couldn’t tell you who smiled wider when dessert was brought out, you or Jack. Both of you tucked in with the same hunger and he just smiled at the scene.

When you and Aaron had first met, it was to do with a case he was working on. He never expected it to blossom into this. The friendship was unexpected but not unwelcome and then before either of you had realised it you had developed feelings for one another.

You were quite a bit younger than him and he was hesitant to bring the feelings up, not understanding what you could possibly see in an older, divorced, single father.

That was the other issue, sure you knew about Jack but there was a difference between knowing about him and wanting to be a part of his life and as much as Aaron had liked you he knew he couldn’t bring somebody into his life who couldn’t accept Jack.

So the pining went on for months as Aaron made the decision for you that you didn’t want to be burdened with a child that wasn’t yours. And when you finally pulled Aaron’s head out of his arse and made him talk about the feelings between you, you could have slapped him silly.

Sure kids weren’t exactly your forte but you’d at least have liked the chance to decide that. From there Aaron had introduced you to Jack after the two of you went on a few dates. The two of you decided the best place would be out in public, a little less daunting and that’s how you ended up at the zoo.

Jack had warmed up to you rather quickly and you surprised yourself with how good you were with him. Eventually it was Jack asking if you could have a sleepover at their house rather than Aaron trying to explain that you might be there in the morning sometimes.

Aaron was so glad you had talked him out of his own head way back when, and as he watched you with Jack, he knew, not that there was any doubt, that he’d made the right choice.

-

“Can we watch a movie?” Jack asked as the three of you entered the house.

“Buddy, it’s nearly bedtime.” Aaron reminded him as he took your coat from you before taking his own off.

“Please daddy,” Jack pleaded, turning on the puppy dog eyes, “I’ll brush my teeth and put my pyjamas on.”

He looked at you but you were looking down at Jack with a soft smile and he couldn’t say no if he wanted to.

“Deal, teeth and pyjamas, we’ll meet back here in five.” Aaron said and grinned as Jack took off running.

“C’mere baby,” He mumbled as he pulled you closer to him, wrapping you up in his arms. “I missed you so much.”

“Missed you too.” You confessed into his chest before titling your head up. Aaron was quick to turn his head, leaning down and capturing your lips in a soft, slow kiss. When he pulled away he didn’t go far, resting his head on your forehead.

“Can’t wait to have you all to myself these next few days.” He told you quietly, fingers brushing against your waist.

“Me neither, it’s going to be heaven.” You replied, matching both his tone and the smile on his face.

“Daddy,” Jack’s voice pulled you away from each other and you turned to see the kid grinning up at Aaron showing his freshly brushed teeth and proudly wearing his Captain America pyjamas. “You and Y/N/N need your pyjamas too.”

“Of course we do!” You exclaimed, taking Aaron’s hand in yours and pulling him towards the bedroom with instructions for Jack to put a movie on.

“Really can’t wait to have you all to myself.” Aaron said again as he watched you pull your shirt over your head.

“Down boy.” You laughed, throwing the shirt at him.

Watching you undress made Aaron long to touch you but seeing you dressed in his clothes, sweatpants that were way too big for you and a college shirt that drooped off your shoulders was somehow infinitely sweeter.

“I love you.” He told you, pulling you close to place a kiss on your exposed shoulder.

“I love you too.” You smiled before turning around and kissing him. “Get changed.” You ordered.

“Yes ma’am.” Aaron laughed but did as you said.

Aaron couldn’t help but smile as he held his family in his arms. Jack was half in your lap and half in Aarons and you were sat flushed against him, head resting on his shoulder and your hand holding Jack’s leg.

The movie was still playing but Jack was fast asleep against his chest and you were pretty close to following. Despite that though, Aaron couldn’t bring himself to move and send you both to bed. Instead he tightened his grip on both of you, smiling as you cuddled further into him.

This, this was all he needed, you and Jack by his side. His little family, both of whom had been through so much. All he wanted to do was protect both of you and he would, god would he do anything to protect the pair of you.

You were one of the best things that had happened to him, he had known it since the day he had met you and he had known it two weeks ago when the team finished a case in California and he walked into the jewellers to buy the ring and he knew it now, looking down at you holding onto him and Jack.

He knew you were the best thing to happen to him in a really long time and he would forever be thankful that he had found you.

Half of a Whole

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Prompt - ‘We would be together and have our books and at night be warm in bed together with the windows open and the stars bright.’

—————————————————–

Falling in love with Spencer Reid was the easiest thing in the world.

You felt like you had known him your whole life and loved him even longer. From the minute the two of you were introduced nobody could deny the chemistry, you always joked that you must have known him in another life.

Never had you felt so comfortable with anyone as fast as you had with Spencer, he was the first person you turned to when you received good news, if you needed a shoulder to cry on Spencer gladly offered his, even if he had struggled the first few times it happened.

The two of you were like the same person and yet somehow you were so different, Spencer’s hesitation when dealing with strangers was fixed as you greeted everyone with a smile and friendly greeting and your struggles were countered by Spencer just as easily. The two of you fitted into each other's lives so easily it was like you had never not known the other.

Spencer Reid had never felt like this before. At first it scared him, god did it terrify him when he couldn’t get you out of his head, every thought somehow led back to you, his eyes straying to find yours when you were in a room together.

It was how he ended up at Derek Morgan’s home at two in the morning, knocking frantically on the door before coming face to face with a disgruntled Derek.

“Kid,” he had said, relaxing slightly as he saw there was no threat, “it’s two in the morning, this better be good.”

“I really need to talk to you.” Spencer told him, twisting his hands together. You had all just gotten back from a case, it was a tough one. You had been the unsubs' latest target and they found you just before the unsub could slit your throat.

Spencer had never felt so scared in his whole life.

“This better be good.” Derek grumbled but pulled the door open to let the younger man in.

It wasn’t long before the two were settled on the sofa together, Derek waiting patiently for Spencer to start talking.

Any other time he would have pushed Spencer to start but he had a feeling this was about you and knew Spencer needed to go at his own pace considering how far out of his comfort zone he was.

“Y/N nearly died today.” It wasn’t what Spencer had intended to say but this was the event that had made him realise just how strongly he felt for you.

“Yeah she did but she’s fine. We got her.” Derek assured him, watching as Spencer nodded but didn’t say anything for a few moments.

“I think I’m in love with her.” Was the next statement and, yeah, that was more along the lines of what he wanted to tell Derek.

“I know you are, kid.” Derek couldn’t smother a smile no matter how hard he tried but seeing Derek’s expression made Spencer relax.

“I’ve never been in love before.” Spencer said, causing Derek’s expression to soften.

“It’s not easy but if she’s the right girl she’s worth it and trust me, Spenc, Y/F/N Y/L/N is the right girl for you.” Derek said, his tone leaving no room for disagreement.

It didn’t take a genius to see that you and Spencer belonged together, Derek didn’t believe in soulmates but looking at the two of you, your souls were definitely half of a whole, nobody could deny that.

“What do I do, Derek?” Spencer asked, turning puppy dog eyes onto his friend.

“You tell her.” Was the wonderful advice Spencer was gifted with at 2:24am.

“That’s it?” Spencer asked dubiously, “I just walk up to her and say ‘hey y/n, I’m completely and hopelessly in love with you.”

Derek chuckled but was impressed the kid wasn’t having a bigger freak out. The entire team, besides you of course, had been waiting for the day Spencer realised his feelings and they were also waiting for the major panic to follow it.

Honestly, Spencer was doing better than anyone expected.

“Well maybe don’t start with that. Just ask her on a date,” When he saw Spencer go to cut him off he shook his head, “trust me, she’s not going to say no. That girl is head over heels for you too, pretty boy.” Derek grinned which turned into a laugh as Spencer flushed.

“I just ask her out?” Spencer asked.

“You just ask her out.” Derek confirmed and that was the beginning of your relationship.

The next day Spencer headed into work, determined to ask you out on a date. He knew how badly you wanted to go to the new restaurant that had recently opened so that sorted out the location, now he just had to ask.

Which was easier said than done.

Every time he tried to ask you, someone or something seemed to interrupt. It was like the universe was working against him. As the work day drew to an end Spencer had given up and was sitting at his desk with a pout, staring down at an open folder without registering any words.

You had just dropped off your paperwork to Hotch and were heading back to your desk when you saw Spencer.

“What’s got you so pouty?” You asked, taking a seat on the edge of his desk, grinning down at him as he startled.

“Y/N,” He said, ignoring your question entirely, “are you leaving?” He questioned instead.

With a laugh you let him change the topic, “yeah, I was just grabbing my bag.”

“Let me give this to Hotch and I’ll walk you out.” He said, standing up abruptly causing you to raise an eyebrow as he practically leaped up the stairs into the office before shrugging and picking up your bag.

As you headed to the door to wait for Spencer you missed the matching grins on Penelope, Derek and Rossi’s faces.

“Hey,” you said softly to Spencer once the pair of you were in the elevator, “are you sure you're okay?

“Will you go on a date with me?” Spencer blurted out, face flushing red as he cursed himself. That is not how he had intended to ask you.

Your eyes widened at the question that was asked so abruptly, not fully registering what he had asked for a second. That second felt like decades to Spencer who silently waited for your response.

The grin that spread across your face though…Spencer would remember it forever.

“I’d love to.” Was your response, not a single doubt in your mind that you wanted this.

Surprising nobody but you and Spencer, nothing much changed between the two of you. There was no awkward getting to know each other phase where you both tried to be people you weren’t, being friends first made everything easier.

Besides the fact that you could cuddle with each other on the plane nothing really changed. Most return flights now found you and Spencer sitting side to side with your heads bent together reading the same book or saw the two of you curled up on the sofa, you lying mostly on top of Spencer so as not to fall off.

The two of you hadn’t realised just how much you acted like a couple until you became one. You loved it, it was so nice to enter a relationship and not have the entire dynamic between the two of you change.

From there it was only a matter of time before you both confessed your love to one another.

You knew you loved Spencer, of course you did. What other word could be used to describe the excitement you had to see him everyday or the way your stomach still filled with butterflies? What other word could possibly sum up the feeling of home whenever Spencer wrapped his arms around you or the fact that you couldn’t help but smile when he walked into a room?

As Spencer had turned to Derek when he realised his feelings for you, you turned to Rossi. The man, god bless that wonderful man, had spent hours listening to you talk about Spencer Reid. He always told you that you should just tell Spencer how you felt but you were plagued with thoughts of losing Spencer or messing up the dynamic you two had. Rossi told you that was stupid, Spencer loved you, anyone could see it, and nothing could come between the two of you.

Eventually you decided to take Rossi’s advice and that night as you slipped into a dress ready for your date with Spencer, you swore you would say those three words.

Obviously nothing is ever that simple and not even halfway through dinner both your phones were chiming with identical messages that summoned you back to work.

“Oh no, not date night.” Penelope frowned as she looked at your outfits. Spencer just smiled at her but you were annoyed. You were so ready to tell Spencer how you felt and once you got your hands on this unsub-

Your thoughts were cut off as somebody lightly kicked your foot under the table, looking up you saw Rossi, the only person who knew how much tonight meant to you, raised an eyebrow at you, frowning in sympathy as you just shook your head, trying not to frown as Hotch apologised to the team and gestured for Penelope to start.

The case was hard but finally there was a breakthrough.

“Reid, JJ, I want you to go to Tomlinson’s house and see if he knows anything.” Hotch directed. It should have been that easy, Daniel Tomlinson’s name had appeared as Garcia checked a list of employees on shift the day of the murder. Nobody suspected Tomlinson of anything, his record was squeaky clean and on paper he looked like a model citizen.

How wrong was that assumption?

“Reid and JJ not back yet?” Rossi asked, it had been at least two hours since Hotch had sent them to Tomlinson’s house and nobody had heard a word from them since.

As Hotch pulled his phone out to call them, you couldn’t help the feeling of dread that settled in the pit of your stomach.

“I’m sure they’re fine.” Rossi said as he turned to you, watching as you grew paler as the call continued to ring. When nobody answered Hotch dialled another number and it was a matter of seconds before Penelope’s voice flowed from the speaker.

“Here to help.” She said and Hotch quickly ordered her to track Spencer and JJ’s cells, “Give me a moment, they are…” here she paused, it was a short pause, maybe lasting for five seconds but to you it felt like an eternity. “They’re at Tomlinson’s house.” She said, her voice wavering as she drew the conclusion you all did.

“Let’s go.” Hotch said and you all rushed to the SUV, police following behind you.

Spencer was unconscious when you arrived, you felt your eyes fill with tears as you choked back a sob. The unsub had JJ held against him as a human shield but you paid little attention to that, all of your focus was on Spencer.

You couldn’t recall exactly how it went down, it was only when the gunshot sounded that you moved over to Spencer, gently lifting his head and placing it in your lap as tears slid down your face. Faintly you could hear Rossi calling for medics as you pleaded with Spencer to wake.

“Please, Spenc, just open your eyes. C’mon baby, wake up.” You begged but he didn’t move. Medics surrounded you but you refused to move, it took Rossi gently lifting you up to move you away.

You turned around, burying your head in Rossi’s chest as sobs escaped you. Rossi held you close to him, whispering soft assurances that you barely heard.

“C’mon, cara mia, I’ll drive you to the hospital.” He said, leading you out of the basement and over to the car, only removing his arm from around your shoulder to help you into the passenger seat. He waited until the other members made their way over and once everyone was buckled in he began following the ambulance to the hospital, never letting go of your hand.

“He’s lucky.” The doctor said as he approached you all, “any longer and he would have bled out. He’s tired and weak but he’ll be ok.” Those were the words you needed to hear and more tears fell down your face as you let out a sob of relief. “You can see him now.”

You all made your way over to his room, everyone insisting that you go in and see him first. You couldn’t tell the team how much you appreciated them in that moment, so you just smiled at them and entered the room.

“Spenc,” you said softly, causing him to open his eyes slowly and smile at you.

“I’m ok.” He said before you could say anything else and he lifted his hand, gesturing for you to come to him. You did without any hesitation, sitting on the bed, making sure it was his uninjured side.

“I was so scared, I thought-“ Here you cut yourself off with another sob and Spencer just smiled up at you, lifting a hand to brush the tears away.

“I’m ok.” He repeated and you nodded.

“God, baby,” you breathed out, raising your own hand to cup his cheek, careful of the bruise on the right side of his face. “I love you so much.” You confessed without realising, it wasn’t until you saw Spencer’s expression change that you realise what you had said.

His eyes widened as he stared up at you, a soft smile that stretched into a grin taking over his face. You looked back at him, your own eyes widening but before panic could set in he spoke.

“I love you too, I have for so long.” He told you, the hand that lingered by your face moved to the back of your head. You felt him gently push and you let yourself be pulled down to meet him in a soft, sweet kiss.

When you pulled away you bit your lip in an attempt to hold back a smile so that you could kiss him again but nothing was stopping the smile that stretched across your face.

“You’re so beautiful.” Spencer whispered, his eyes taking in every feature of your face, thumb tracing your bottom lip.

The next big milestone for the pair of you was when Spencer asked you to move in.

Before dating you Spencer couldn’t imagine sharing his apartment with somebody else, though cluttered he knew where every book was placed, he knew everything belonged to him, he didn’t have to worry about people moving his files or misplacing one of his books.

When Derek asked him about how he felt about moving in with you, however, Spencer held no reservations. He wanted to live with you, he wanted you in his space, he wanted to see how your books looked on his bookcase and see evidence of you living there everyday whether it was a toothbrush in the bathroom or a pair of your shoes discarded by the door for him to trip on.

He wanted that.

You were in Spencer’s apartment, it was late and the two of you lay in his bed. There was no better feeling in the world, you believed, than being tucked up against Spencer Reid. Spencer looked down at you, half asleep and gripping his shirt and knew he wanted this more than anything.

He wanted to go to bed with you every night and he wanted to wake up to you. How could any day possibly be bad if he got to see your face first thing in the morning? The thought of you two waking up together everyday, him watching as you woke up before the two of you headed to the kitchen, working perfectly in sync with one another to make breakfast.

God, he wanted it.

“Move in with me.” He said, watching you blink the sleep away before turning your head to look up at him. “Please move in with me.”

“Okay.” You told him, smiling up at him. Giggling as he shifted the two of you so he was on top of you.

“I love you so much.” He told you before leaning down and capturing your lips in a rushed, heated kiss.

-

“Why do you have so many books?” Derek groaned as he brought another box up.

When the team found out you were moving in together they had offered to help and that is how you all ended up spending your day off, moving boxes from your house to Spencer’s, everyone grumbling about how much books weighed.

“Seriously, are you even gonna have enough room for all of these?” Derek asked as he looked around the room, seeing all the boxes piled up and knowing there was more to come.

“We’ll make room.” Spencer assured with a laugh.

“You’re lucky I love you two.” Derek told you both, wagging a finger as he did  before he headed back down to grab another box.

It took most of the day but eventually all the boxes were brought up, you had handed in your apartment key and the rest of the team had headed home so it was just you and Spencer. You closed the door before turning around to face Spencer with a grin, him already looking at you with the same expression.

“We live together.” You said, causing him to laugh.

“C’mere” he said, pulling you close and leaning down to kiss you softly. “Thank you for agreeing to move in.” He whispered as he pulled away.

“Thank you for asking me.”

The two of you ended up starting to put some of your books away, you couldn’t help but smile as you saw random empty spaces across the bookcases where Spencer had obviously made room for your books. You turned to thank him, giggling at the soft blush that spread across his cheeks.

“Maybe Morgan was right.” You said, flopping down on the sofa next to Spencer who laughed and automatically wrapped his arm around you. It had taken four boxes of books to fill most of the spaces Spencer had cleared out and there were still so many to go.

“We’ll make room.” Spencer told you, repeating his words for earlier. You turned up to face him, lazily leaning up and pressing a kiss against his jaw line.

“Can we go to bed please?” You said, pulling away and giving him your best puppy dog eyes. “I’m exhausted.”

He chuckled at you, leaning down to kiss your forehead before standing up and offering you a hand. It wasn’t long before the two of you had changed out of your clothes and were tucked up in bed together.

The windows were open, allowing a welcomed breeze to cool down the room, and the curtains hadn’t been drawn properly allowing the lights from the street to leak through. You rested your head on Spencer’s shoulder, smiling to yourself as you realised you got to do this every night.

You whined as Spencer shifted, watching as he grabbed one of the books from his night stand. He turned the pages before stopping on a new chapter.

“Read to me?” You asked quietly, not wanting to break the peaceful atmosphere.

“Of course love.” He murmured, placing a soft kiss on your head. “French or English?” He asked, causing you to glance at the book again and sure enough the words printed were in French.

“French.” You whispered, cuddling further into him, smiling as he began.

“J’ai regardé devant moi. Dans la foule je t’ai vue. Parmi les blés je t’ai vue. Sous un arbre je t’ai vue. Au bout de tous mes voyages. Au fond de tous mes tourments. Au tournant de tous les rires. Sortant de l’eau et du feu. L’été l’hiver je t’ai vue. Dans ma maison je t’ai vue. Entre mes bras je t’ai vue. Dans mes rêves je t’ai vue. Je ne te quitterai plus.”

“I looked in front of me. In the crowd I saw you. Among the wheat I saw you. Beneath a tree I saw you. At the end of my journeys. In the depths of my torment. At the corner of every smile. Emerging from water and fire. Summer and winter I saw you. All through my house I saw you. In my arms I saw you. In my dreams I saw you. I will never leave you.”

Before Spencer had finished the poem you were asleep against his chest, the small smile still on your face. Spencer leaned down to press another gentle, barely there kiss against your head before he placed the book down and wrapped his arms around you, drifting off to sleep with his own smile.

Some Things Are Worth The Risk

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Prompt - 'But he'd learned long ago that a life lived without risks pretty much wasn't worth living.’

Working for the FBI and hiding secrets, especially when you worked in the BAU surrounded by some of the best profilers in the world, was incredibly difficult but by some miracle you had managed it. The first few months on the job were terrible, you kept to yourself despite the team's attempt to draw you in, you dreaded every time you were called into Hotch’s office, thinking that he knew what you were hiding.

Eventually though, after months on the job you figured if they hadn’t found you out by now then it was unlikely they would. You began to relax, accepting the invitations for drinks at the bar and going to the dinners Rossi hosted. The team didn’t question the change in your behaviour, they just assumed that you were shy and it had taken you a while to adjust to everything.

Though you never forgot the secret, the weight of it constantly felt like it was resting on your shoulders, hell it was the whole reason you had joined the BAU to begin with, but you’d gotten so good at hiding it that some days it was easy to ignore it.

So when Hotch called you at three in the morning with a new case, you had no reason to be worried. Why would you be? It was standard to get called at all hours for a case, there was no rest for the unsubs. It hadn’t taken you too long to get to the air strip but everyone else was already on the jet when you walked in. You took the empty seat next to Hotch, sitting opposite Rossi and Spencer. Everyone looked to be in various states of waking up and you knew you were no better, eyes more shut than they were open, fully intending on falling back asleep once the jet was in the air.

Hotch didn’t start talking until the jet had taken off. He handed out the files to you all and you flicked it open, not paying too much attention to where you were going, your eyes going straight to the pictures. All the women looked similar, all in their mid to late thirties, all with the same skin colour, hair colour and length. Each woman had one slash wound across their neck, which was determined to be the cause of death, each had been stabbed twice, once in the stomach and once the right thigh and each woman had chemical burns on their eyes due to bleach being poured into them.

As you read over the information you found yourself subconsciously sitting up straighter, eyes widening with each bit of information. You knew that MO but there was no way it could be who you thought…it was impossible. A life sentence prevented it from being the person you thought it was.

Hotch noticed your tense form and gently nudged your shoulder with his. As you let yourself get closer with the team, you found yourself getting especially close to Aaron Hotchner, you weren’t even sure how it had happened but before you knew it you found yourself being invited to his house for dinner with him and Jack or going out alone for dinner when Jess offered to watch his son. You found yourself developing feelings for the older man, knowing that it couldn’t go anywhere, he was your supervisor and the director was already breathing down the BAU’s neck. It didn’t mean you would stop spending time with him or savouring the small touches he gave you.

“You ok?” He whispered when you didn’t look away from the file in your hand. Before you could respond Penelope’s voice was sounding through the jet.

“I’d love to be the bearer of good news once in a while but that has yet to happen,” As she spoke you looked up at Aaron and gave him a small nod, forcing a smile on your face. He didn’t look convinced but he let it go for now, you knew the second he got you alone though he would question you again.

“Another victim?” Tara asked.

"Yes, no ID yet but I should have one for you by the time you land. She was found the same way the other victims were, in her home, tied to a chair with the same,” here Penelope paused to grimace before gesturing to the screens in front of her with a pink fluffy pen, “wounds. Local police are waiting for you guys before they move the body.” Penelope informed you all before saying goodbye.

“Reid, Morgan I want the two of you to head straight to the newest crime scene. JJ, go to the station and get a head start on the media. Lewis and Dave, head to the last crime scenes and see if you can see anything. Y/N, you and I will head to the ME and see what they can tell us.” Everyone nodded along and began to strap themselves in for the land.

You had a bad feeling about this case.

-

“So each victim has the same set out ligature marks on each wrist but there are no defensive wounds. All the victims have the same stab wounds but what interested me about them was how precise they were.” The medical examiner said as she gestured for you to look at the pictures displayed.

“They’re in the exact same place each time.” Hotch said as he stepped forward to examine them.

“Yes, whoever did this also knew exactly where to hit so that the victims would be in an excruciating amount of pain but wouldn’t bleed out. There were also chemical wounds in their eyes created using bleach.”

As the medical examiner spoke you continued to examine the bodies whilst Hotch looked at the different images displayed. The MO was too similar to ignore and you knew there was one thing missing, one thing that if you confirmed was there would send you spiralling. You knew where to look but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

The medical examiner and Hotch continued talking and you took a deep breath, glad Hotch’s attention wasn’t on you, if he glanced at you now he would have immediately pulled you from the room and made you tell him what was wrong.

You stepped closer to one of the bodies, it wouldn’t be there, you thought, it couldn’t be there because there was a life sentence in place that meant this couldn’t happen again. You squeezed your eyes shut before opening them again and pulling the sheet of the victim, it took a moment before you let your eyes shift down to the victims left hand.

“Y/N.” Hotch said, turning to face you after hearing a crash. You had pulled away from the victim so fast and ended up crashing into the table full of supplies, sending them toppling down to the floor. “Y/N.” Hotch said again, hurrying over to your side.

Tears fell down your face and you felt the air leave your lungs. You gasped for breath and felt your head felt like it was pounding. This couldn’t be happening but the evidence was right there in front of you, a small cross carved onto the victim’s fourth finger right where a wedding ring would rest.

“Y/N, hey, listen to me.” You heard Hotch say softly, though you could hear the slight panic in his tone. “Copy my breathing.” He instructed and though it took a long while eventually your breathing evened out and the feeling of being light headed started to subside.

Hotch watched you collect yourself as best you could with tears still running down your face before he spoke.

“What is it, Y/N?” He asked softly.

“I know who the killer is.” Was your whispered reply.

-

Hotch drove the two of you to the precinct, neither of you saying a word as you followed him into the conference room. Everyone looked up at his arrival, Derek ready to fill him in on what they gathered but one look at your puffy, red eyes cut him short.

“What’s going on?” He asked instead.

“Get Garcia on the phone now.” Hotch requested, Tara was quick to call the woman who answered cheerily.

“Garcia, I need you to look up a William Parker quickly.” He said and Penelope promptly started typing, the only sound to be heard as they awaited her answer.

“Um, right, here it is, William Parker, aged 53, born in…Charlevoix, Michigan. He had a wife and a daughter.” Garcia read out and Hotch turned to look back at you. You hadn’t told him how you knew Parker, only that you were sure he was the killer. He hadn’t doubted you, not after a reaction like that, he trusted you on this.

“Had?” Derek asked, leaning forward in his seat, "What happened to them, baby girl?”

Hotch was still watching you and saw how you tensed up, what was going on?

“Give me a sec, I’m getting them unsealed right now.” It took a couple of minutes in which the team shot each other looks of confusion and looks of concern in your direction but Penelope let out a small ‘ah ha’ and drew their attention back to the phone. “Wow, ok, are you thinking this guys your unsub because if so I’d say you're absolutely right.”

“How so, Garcia?” Hotch asked. You glanced up and saw him looking at you. It was taking everything in you not to flee the room right now.

“Well, he was arrested years back for killing his wife. Police showed up at the house when their neighbour called the police after hearing crying for hours. They found the wife tied to a chair, two stab wounds in the stomach and right thigh, bleach in the eye and a slash wound to the neck.” Here Penelope gasped, “Oh no.”

“What baby girl?” Derek asked.

“The crying. Parker’s daughter was found covered in a mix of her and her mom’s blood. She was tied against the chair her mom was in, covered in cuts and bruises.” Hotch, who still had yet to take his eyes off you, watched as you rubbed your wrists the realisation hitting him.

“Garcia, what happened to the kid?” Rossi asked and Hotch saw your body shake with silent sobs.

“She got placed in witness protection so it’ll take me a while to find out exactly where she is now but it seemed she was moved out of state after giving evidence at her dad’s trial.” Penelope said as she clicked a link before gasping. You might have been young in that picture but she’d know your face anywhere.

“Oh my god.” Penelope said, tears filling her own eyes. That was the confirmation Hotch needed and he immediately wrapped you in his arms, everyone’s attention turning to you as you let out heart wrenching sobs.

“Garcia,” Derek says, not wanting it to be true.

“It’s Y/N, our Y/N.” She says quietly, the room falling silent except for the sounds of your sobbing.

-

Spencer handed you a cup of water before taking a seat next to you. You looked up at him, shooting him a grateful smile. You had managed to calm down a bit with Hotch’s help and now you were sitting at the table in between Spencer and Hotch. Everyone was shooting you concerned looks but you couldn’t look at them. Penelope was on the phone as the team set to work on finding where Parker was now.

“Wait, so this guy should be serving a life sentence, right?” Derek asked Penelope who began typing again.

“He was charged with life in prison but two weeks ago he got transferred and managed to escape.” Penelope told them, “It seems Parker and another man Lewis Miller managed to escape but Miller was caught pretty quickly.”

“Y/N,” Tara starts carefully, “how did you know this was him?”

“The MO was too similar to ignore but I was hoping,” You began but cut yourself off as tears began to fill your eyes. Hotch frowned sympathetically as he placed his hand on one of yours and you let yourself take comfort from the touch. You took a shaky breath before continuing, “I was hoping, maybe it was a copycat, you know? All that information was released to the press but there was one thing he did to my mom,” You choked out. Spencer pushed the water in your direction causing you to smile and take small sips. “He carved a small ‘x’ into her ring finger right where her wedding ring would sit. When Hotch and I were with the ME, I checked and the victims had the same carvings.”

With that you turned into Hotch, despite the chair's arms in between and he wrapped both his arms around you.

“We’ll find him.” He promised, smiling sadly when he felt you nod against his chest.

-

“There’s been a new body but there’s something different.” The chief informed you all as he entered the conference room you’d been given.

“What is it?” Hotch asked, standing up.

“The woman, it was a girl in her mid twenties.” He said and the whole team turned to look at you. You only had eyes for Hotch though, he turned to see you looking at him with fear in your eyes.

“Hey,” he said, making his way over to you and leaning down so that you were eye level. “This is not your fault, you understand me?” He asked.

“Hotch,” you choked out but the older man cut you off.

“No, Y/N, this, none of this is your fault. I promise.” It was like those were the words you needed to hear, you let out a shaky breath and nodded. “You need to stay here, ok?”

“No, Aaron please. I need to be on this case.” You pleaded but you could see the man wasn’t going to budge.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, but somehow he knows you’re here, that’s the only reason he’d change victimology. I can’t, I won’t risk you getting hurt. I promise you we’ll catch him but for me to do that, you have to stay here, where I know you’re safe.” Hotch told you and the sincerity of it had you nodding. You didn’t like it but ultimately you knew he was right.

“Okay.” You said, causing him to give you a small smile.

“Thank you.” He said before straightening up and pulling you into his arms. “We’ll get him.” He repeated and you nodded against his chest, fully believing him.

“I’ll stay with her.” Rossi offered as the rest of the team headed for the door. Hotch shot his friend a grateful look before turning to leave himself.

Nobody hurt you and got away with it.

-

On the way to the latest crime scene Penelope called Hotch and informed them that she had combed through security camera footage and found Parker driving away. The two SUV’s turned their sirens on and broke every road law there was, following Penelope’s instructions and taking one too many sharp turns that left them clutching their seats but eventually they caught up with the man.

Parker instantly sped up upon seeing two SUV’s but that didn’t deter them and Hotch pressed his foot even harder to the pedal. When Parker made a sharp right turn down a dirt road, Hotch spoke up.

“Garcia, where does the lead?” He heard her typing as she desperately tried to find something of interest but nothing came up.

“Nowhere, sir.” She replied.

“There has to be something!” Hotch snapped, missing the look of concern Spencer gave him from the passenger seat.

“Sir, there’s nothing ther-wait a second, ok, there’s a cabin. Not too far from where you are now, another two minutes down that road.” Penelope rushed out.

“Thank you, Penelope.” Spencer replied as he watched Hotch’s face harden.

“Go get him.” Penelope commanded.

-

The SUV hadn’t come to a full stop as Hotch jumped out of it, chasing after Parker with his gun drawn. Parker had fled into the house and Hotch didn’t hesitate before he kicked it open and entered, the team following close behind.

They split up, Tara and JJ heading upstairs whilst Derek headed down to the basement and Spencer and Hotch searched the ground floor.

Hotch paused when he heard something scrape and turned to see the back door open. He was quick to run out, spotting Parker instantly. He didn’t have a shot, not from there and chased after him.

“Parker’s on foot, backdoor, into the woods.” Hotch said through the comms.

“Copy.”

Hotch continued to chase Parker through the woods before coming to a halt. The trail split into two different turnings…Hotch had lost him. He lowered his gun as he cursed himself for letting Parker get away before he spun around after hearing a gun click.

“So you’re the bastard who got my daughter.” Parker spat, looking Hotch up and down.

“And you’re the bastard who tied her to her dead mom after torturing her.” Hotch said as he cocked his gun.

“Ah, ah, ah,” Parker says, smirking at Hotch. “You can’t shoot me, I haven’t done anything to prevent you making an arrest.”

“The way I see it,” Hotch began, not taking his finger off the trigger. “There’s no-one here but us.” He said, smirking at the man in an attempt to aggravate him. He watched as Derek and Spencer appeared behind the man but hidden behind trees with their guns drawn.

“You wouldn’t.” Parker said, his face darkening as he took a step back.

“You really want to test that theory?” Hotch asked and with that Parker pulled the trigger. Hotch, having been expecting it, managed to move before the bullet left the gun and both Spencer and Derek fired their own weapons.

He watched as Parker’s body fell to the floor and Derek confirmed he was dead.

-

“He’s really gone?” You asked Hotch, who nodded and smiled softly as you fell against his chest.

“He’s really gone.” He reassured you, wrapping his arms around your waist and letting his head rest against yours after placing a soft kiss against your hair.

“Thank you.” You whispered.

“You never had to thank me.” Hotch replied, his tone as soft as yours.

“God,” You groaned when the two of you pulled away from each other as everyone else came out of the police station, “I never wanna come back to this damned town again.” You said, causing everyone to laugh.

“Let’s get you home, mama.” Derek said as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, pulling you against him and kissing your temple before leading you over to the SUV.

Hotch watched with a smile as Derek held the door open for you and you got into the car with a soft giggle.

“When are you going to ask her out?” Rossi asked from his spot next to Hotch.

“When we get home.” Hotch replied, shocking both himself and Rossi. He hadn’t actually been considering it but he knew it was right. Screw what people would say, you were right for him and hopefully you felt the same way about him.

“Attaboy.” Rossi smirked before heading over to the SUV.

Hotch stood there for a moment, just smiling to himself before Spencer pulled him out of his thoughts by placing a hand on his shoulder.

“You ready to leave?” He asked.

“Yes.” Hotch grimaced causing Spencer to smile and with that the two men made their way over to the SUV’s before leaving the town behind them all.

-

“Wait,” Tara said, causing everyone to look at her. You were sitting next to Hotch, letting your head rest against his shoulder whilst his arm was wrapped around your waist. Spencer and Rossi sat opposite you with JJ and Derek sitting on the sofa and Tara standing in the walkway. “Is your name even really Y/N?” She asked, causing everyone to look at you.

“It is, they wanted to change it, said it was protocol but, well you know me, I’m not one for protocol.” You said, causing everyone to laugh. “I managed to convince them to let me keep my first name and then my last name came from my mom’s side, my nan’s maiden name.”

“Y/F/N /Y/L/N, it suits you much better.” JJ said, making you smile.

“I like to think so.” You laughed.

“So when you said you grew up in New York?” Derek prompted.

“I got relocated there. The family I was placed with, they weren’t the best but they were nothing compared to my dad so I just stuck it out for the next few years and then moved here to start with the FBI program.” You all continued to talk for the entire plane ride about your past and you found it was easier to talk about.

Even though your dad had been in prison, as far as you had known anyway, there was always that lingering anxiety in the back of your head. Clearly it was for good reason, you couldn’t believe he had broken out but Aaron…Aaron made sure he couldn’t hurt you again.

You smiled to yourself as you cuddled further into him, heat spreading across your cheeks when you felt him tighten his grip.

-

“Oh my gosh, you’re ok!” Penelope said as soon as the elevator doors opened. You stepped out and let yourself be pulled into her warm embrace.

No matter how bad things got you could always count on Penelope Garcia to be there with open arms and a shoulder to cry on.

“I’m ok.” You assured her, pulling back to smile at her. “Thank you for helping them get him.” You said, watching her eyes water before she pulled you into another hug.

“I’m just so glad you’re safe.” She said before pulling away.

“Need a ride home?” Hotch asked as everyone headed to their desks.

“If you don’t mind.” You smiled.

“Of course not.” Hotch replied, shaking his head and smiling at you.

He had such a beautiful smile, all the hard lines on his face softened and he looked so much more relaxed this way.

“Thank you.” Hotch promised he’d be fast as he headed to his office to sort some things out, his report could wait until tomorrow. Right now you were his only priority. He told the rest of his team that the reports could wait, it was late and everyone should go home.

You and Hotch said goodbye to everyone before heading off to the elevator, you missing the smirk Rossi was giving Hotch.

On the ride down Hotch pondered just what he was going to say to you, how could he ask you out? Should he even ask you? If you said no it could ruin everything between you but then he thought back to how good it felt to be able to hold you in his arms, despite the awfulness of the case, and came to the conclusion that this was one of the things that was worth risking everything for.

Hotch remained silent for most of the car ride home and it was only when you spoke up he realised it.

“Are you ok?” You asked softly, drawing him from his thoughts. He cleared his throat before nodding.

“Yes, yes, I’m fine. Sorry, I was just thinking…” He said before trailing off.

“Nothing bad?” You asked, biting your lip as you waited for an answer. You watched as he smiled before letting out a small chuckle.

“No, nothing bad. At least I hope it’s nothing bad.” He said, causing you to look over at him, your brows knitting together as you tilted your head questioningly. He let out a soft sigh as he pulled up to your apartment complex.

“I was thinking about you.” He confessed, his tone soft as he looked away from you. Dave had assured him multiple times that you felt the same way as he did and as much as he trusted the older profilers skills, he just couldn’t see how someone like you could be interested in him. He was so much older, he had so much baggage…he just couldn’t understand it.

“Me?” You asked, keeping your voice quiet so you didn’t disturb the quietness around you.

“Yes. You’re what I’m thinking about most of the time actually, it’s quite distracting.” He told you with a small chuckle. “I know this probably isn’t appropriate and it’s probably not the best time considering the case we just had but I wondered if maybe I could take you out for dinner some time?” He asked, trying not to fumble over his words.

You couldn’t help the smile that stretched across your face or the blush that stained your cheeks.

“Like a date?” You asked, your smiling faltering as Aaron shook his head.

“Not like a date but an actual date.” He clarified, smiling as the smile came back to your face and you let out a laugh.

“I’d like that,” You told him, “I’d really like that.”

“Good, me too.” He said, clearing his throat as he registered the fact that you had said yes. You giggled softly as he sat there silently for a second. “If we don’t have a case this weekend, are you free?”

“Yes.”

“Good, good. I’ll pick you up at 6?” He asked and you nodded.

Before either of you could speak, you let out a small yawn, only just noticing how late it had gotten.

“You should get some sleep.” Hotch said softly.

“You too.” You told him, knowing he had slept very little on this case too.

“I will.” He promised. “If you need tomorrow off,” Hotch began but you cut him off.

“No, thanks but I’m good.” You assured him, watching as his eyes searched yours before he nodded.

“Goodnight Y/N,” he whispered, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on your cheek, smiling as the blush spread across them again.

“Goodnight Aaron.” You replied, smiling over at him almost shyly before getting out of the car and making your way over to the door.

Once you pushed it open you turned to wave at him before letting the door shut behind you. You couldn’t help but lean against it, in the way that only happens in those cheesy rom-coms you watch with Penelope, smiling widely to yourself before heading up to your apartment.

Hotch was still sitting outside, smiling at the door you had just entered.

If he felt this happy after you agreed to go on a date with him, he couldn’t wait until the weekend came. This definitely was one of the things that was worth this risk and somehow, despite all the bad luck he and his team seemed to attract, he really believed this could be one of the few things that went right.

State of Grace

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Prompt - ‘I never saw you coming and I'll never be the same.’

Notes - We're celebrating Red (Taylor's Version) here and I'll be doing imagines for each song on the album so if you have a request (any fandom I write for) send it in!

You never saw him coming. It was like one day the universe had decided it was going to stop screwing you over and finally give you something good. Everything about him was so amazingly unique, he was everything you’d wanted in a person, everything a person should be and somehow he had decided you were something special too.

That morning you made the short walk to the cafe you frequently went to before work, passing a blur of cars only slowing down as the traffic lights changed. The streets were busy despite the earliness, shades of red painted the sky in the morning hours and birds could barely be heard chirping over the noise of the cars.

Despite the music in your ears your thoughts were on the failure of last night's blind date. It was one of many, your friends determined that you needed a partner but after your last relationship, dating was honestly the last thing you wanted to do but you relented and went out with the guys they found. Your last boyfriend had been horrible. He was sweet in the beginning but as time went on… You’d tried to leave the relationship so many times but you just couldn’t. Eventually you had managed to leave, packing your bags and leaving for good.

And now you were stuck being set up because your friends thought a relationship would help, it had been long enough they had told you. Sure they were right, it had been a while since you left your ex but each date they set you up on was just…boring. None of the men were able to hold an intellectual conversation, all of them were just very plain. The last guy was a creep to say the least, something about him made you feel very uneasy. It wasn’t even anything in particular he said but just a feeling, the way he looked at you…it set all the internal warning alarms off.

Thankfully you were able to politely decline his advances for him to come to your house and get back home safely. You had told yourself that was the last date you were going on and that’s when he came into your life and you’d never be the same again.

-

“Excuse me,” A soft voice said, interrupting you from the page you were reading. Looking up you saw a man, his eyes were bright and kind and there was a gentle smile on his face. He looked down at you, fidgeting with the bag on his shoulder. “I’m so sorry to disturb you, I was just wondering if it would be ok if I sat here?” He asked, gesturing to the empty seat across from you.

You scanned the cafe quickly, taking note of how it had filled since you’d walked in before turning your attention back to the man in front of you. He was a handsome looking man, with sharp cheekbones and long hair that looked soft. He was wearing a suit and you guessed he was on his way to work and, like you, was early enough to enjoy a hot drink in the small cafe. He seemed kind, there was something about him that seemed trustworthy.

You smiled up at him and gestured towards the seat, “Of course.”

“Thank you so much.” He smiled, shrugging his bag off and sitting down opposite you.

You didn’t want to stare at him, you tried to turn your attention back to the book in your hands but it was near impossible. Biting your lip, you risked a glance up and saw he was looking out of the window at the different people passing, his drink warming his hands, before he turned in your direction. You were quick to look away but he continued to look at you, glancing down at the book you had been reading.

“Sherlock?” He asked, a grin spreading across his face.

“My friend suggested that I read it,” You smiled back.

“What do you think so far?” Somehow, just from looking at the man across from you, it didn’t surprise you that he was a reader, of course you wouldn’t know yet just how much he read but right now it just made sense.

“I’m actually really enjoying it. I was a little apprehensive considering it was written so long ago but it’s really good.”  You watched as his face lit us as you spoke, eyes wide as he listened to yours words, nodding along with you.

“I think Doyle’s writing, despite being written in 1892, is very much still readable to this day. That’s one of the many great things about his writing…” And with that the man began to ramble on about how the writing style, the use of imagery and how well the plot develops.

You rested your chin on your fist, leaning forward in your seat as the man spoke. You couldn’t help but smile as his hands gestured widely in front of him, the passion he spoke with was beautiful to watch. The man before you was so unashamedly expressive in sharing his thoughts and opinions with you and you could do little more than listen, captivated by him, nodding along as you took in his words.

Your eyebrows knitted together as he cut himself off abruptly, his cheeks turning red as he looked down at his lap.

“I’m sorry, usually people stop me when I start rambling. I’ve already distracted you and here I am now not letting you read-“ He was saying but you cut him off.

“Hey, I was actually enjoying listening to you. Not many people are able to hold a conversation about classic literature, yet alone with the passion you have.” You told him, smiling softly as his cheeks flushed some more but the frown was gone and a smile made its way back onto his face. Good, you thought, he looks so much better when he’s smiling.

“Yeah,” He said with a bashful laugh, “I quite enjoy reading, though I rarely get a chance to talk about the things I’ve read.”

“Same here,” You told him, though you doubted you liked to read as much as him, the man seemed like the type to have full bookcases and then more books scattered throughout his house.

The man went to speak but was cut off by the ringing off his phone, he shot you an apologetic smile before fishing the phone out of his pocket.

“Hey,” He answered, the smile dropping from his face as the person on the phone spoke. His face grew serious as he nodded to whatever information he was being given, “I’ll be in soon, alright, bye.”

“Sorry about that.” He said, turning back to you.

“No problem, I should get to work too.” You smiled and began to pack your phone and book away. The man stood when you did and the two of you walked out of the cafe together, you smiling as he held the door open for you to step out first.

“Hey, um, I don’t,” the man began, clearing his throat and he shuffled on his feet, “I don’t normally do this, ever,” here he paused to let out an awkward, breathy laugh, “but would it maybe, and totally say no if I’m overstepping, but would it be ok if I gave you my number? I’m really curious to see what you’ll think about the book.”

You couldn’t help the soft smile that spread across your face. The man in front of you was charmingly awkward right now, making it obvious that his statement of not doing this much was true. Though you had said you were done with guys and dating, you wanted this one to give you his number and you wanted to speak to him again.

“I’d like that.” You told him honestly, laughing as he looked at you in slight shock for a second before nodding. You pulled your phone out and let him enter his phone number.

“It really was great meeting you…” He said before trailing off, looking at you curiously.

“Y/F/N, Y/F/N Y/L/N.” You told him, watching as he smiled before repeating it to himself.

“It was really great meeting you, Y/N. I’m Spencer Reid by the way.” He told you with a dimpled smile.

“It was great meeting you too.” You said, shocked by how much you meant it. The two of you stood outside of the cafe for a moment, just smiling at each other before you cleared your throat. “I should let you get to work.”

“Right, right, you too!” He said, still making no move to leave causing your smile to grow.

“I’ll call you.” You promise, watching as he nodded.

“I hope so.” He said softly before wishing you a good day and heading in the opposite direction to you.

You had never saw him coming and things would never be the same.

-

You called Spencer that evening, filling him in on the latest chapters you’d read, him happily listening with a grin on his face and adding his own thoughts and opinions throughout. You were surprised with how easy it was to talk to him, it felt like you had known him for your whole life, like meeting an old friend who you had fallen out of touch with before being thrown back into each other's life again.

The two of you spoke for at least two hours, both with wide smiles on your faces and butterflies in your stomach.

As the time began to dawn on the two of you, you both began to say your goodnight but before you could hand up the phone Spencer stopped you.

“Wait,” He said, louder than either you had been speaking, causing you to raise an eyebrow. “Would you like to go out for dinner?” The way he asked made it sound like he was shocking himself.

You couldn’t help but smile to yourself. You had meant it this morning when you said you were done with dating, the men your friends had set you up with were either dreadfully dull, only there to get in your pants or creeps…or a mix of all three. But Spencer, there was something about Spencer that immediately put you at ease, his non threatening demeanour made you feel safe around him and, as shown through the two and a half hour phone call tonight, he was anything but boring. The way he spoke, even across the phone, was lively, it was endearing and you found yourself wanting to see him again.

“I’d love to.” You told him honestly.

“Oh,” he said, causing you to laugh, “that’s great, really great. Um, I’ll let you know when I’m back and we can figure something out if that’s ok with you?”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” you said before pausing, titling your head in confusion, “Wait, where are you?”

“I’m in California. I work for the FBI’’s Behavioral Analysis Unit.” He told him, causing your eyebrow to furrow together before it clicked.

“You’re a profiler?” You asked.

“Is that ok?” He asked back, knowing that this could be the dealbreaker and he’d understand, he really would, this job was dangerous and he knew that would take a toll on any partners.

You thought it over for a moment, as dangerous as the job seemed, you wanted to get to know Spencer.

“Let me know when you’re back in town.” You said, causing him to smile widely to himself.

“I will,” he told you softly, “Goodnight, Y/N.”

“Goodnight Spencer.” You before hanging up the phone and throwing yourself back onto your bed with a grin.

Spencer had a smile on his face that he could wipe off if he tried and he held the phone tightly in his hands. He was sitting outside, the sun had just been setting when you had first called him. He was in his hotel room with Derek but upon hearing your voice he excused himself to go sit outside the hotel he was staying at, a jacket thrown over his shoulders to combat the slight chill of the autumn air.

He sat there for a few minutes before he made his way back to his room, fully prepared for the grin that Derek shot him as he walked in. Derek let Spencer go about his nightly routine and waited until the younger profiler had sat down on his own bed before speaking up.

“C’mon kid, talk to me.” He exclaimed, watching as Spencer rolled his eyes but a smile worked its way onto his face, “Who’s the girl?”

Spencer debated it for a moment before sighing dramatically causing Derek’s grin to widen, if it were possible.

“Her name is Y/N, I met her this morning before we got called in and I’m taking her out when we get back.” He told Derek who let out a laugh of disbelief.

“Spencer Reid, my man!” He laughed, standing to clap a hand on Spencer’s shoulder.

Spencer couldn’t help but grin up at Derek. They both knew how something like this was not something Spencer did…ever but it felt right with you. He wanted to get to know you, even if it meant stepping outside of his comfort zone.

“She must be one hell of a girl.” Derek said, making his way to the bathroom with a grin firmly in place. He was happy for the kid, it was about time he got a break.

Spencer didn’t disagree with Derek’s statement as he settled into bed, already planning on what to do for your date.

-

“Wow,” Spencer said, feeling speechless, “you look stunning.” He said, finally causing you to blush widely.

“Thank you,” You smiled, looking him up and down, “You’re looking pretty stunning too.” You told him, watching as his own blush spread across his cheeks.

“Thank you,” He smiled shyly, looking down before looking at you, holding an arm out for you to take before leading you to the car and holding the door open for you. You smiled softly at him before climbing in, smoothing your dress out nervously as he made his way to the drivers side.

It wasn’t long before the two were seated, conversation flowing easily between the two of you.

“He gave your number to the press?” You asked through your laughter, Spencer sat opposite you laughing himself, dimples on full display.

“Yeah, gave them my name and everything and Morgan’s a, he's good with women so obviously my phone was ringing constantly.” He continued, watching as you smiled brightly as you laughed along.

“Did you at least get him back?” You giggled watching as Spencer smirked.

“I went to MIT and let’s just say never wage a prank war on an MIT graduate.” He laughed, causing you to groan.

“What did you do?”

As Spencer continued to tell you about his and Derek’s prank war you couldn’t help but laugh along. You couldn’t remember the last time you had this much fun, though you tried to pretend you were happy when you were with your ex you knew, if you were being honest with yourself, that you were lying. You wanted so badly to make it work that you managed to fool yourself for a long time, bending over backwards in order to please him and it still wasn’t enough. No amount of effort was enough.

But here, now, with Spencer…you felt so much better than you had in a long, long time. It was like a weight had been lifted off you, a weight you didn’t know you were still carrying. Sitting here with tears of laughter in your eyes rather than tears of anger, tears of sadness…it was a feeling you had long forgotten.

“I had a wonderful night, Y/N.''  Spencer smiled, once he had pulled back up to your house he was quick to open your car door, taking your hand delicately in his before leading you up to your door.

“Me too.” You told him sincerely. It had been so long since you’d felt this genuinely happy, you were shocked with how easy everything with Spencer was, he really did have a way of soothing your nerves, making you feel safe and calm around him, like you had known him your whole life.

You hoped that he was sincere when he said he’d had a good time because you wanted to see him again. God, did you want to see him again. Everything about him was so unique, he made it easy to be yourself, made you want to be yourself.

“Can I see you again?” He asked and you beamed up at him, the smile one that you couldn’t hide even if you tried. Spencer mirrored the expression, taking it as a good sign.

“Yeah,” you said with a giggle, Spencer's grin fading into a soft smile as he brushed a piece of hair behind your ear. “I’d really like that.”

He took a moment to just look at you, the soft light of the moon and the street lamps created an amber glow making you look beautiful.

Spencer leaned down, slowly to give you time to move, before he pressed his lips gently to your cheek, letting them linger for a moment before he pulled away.

“Goodnight Y/N.” He said softly, not wanting to break the atmosphere between you two.

“Goodnight Spencer.” You said, smiling softly and matching his tone, before turning to open your door and waving him goodbye.

-

You may not have saw Spencer coming into your life but you were so glad he had. As time went on and the two of you went on several more dates you could feel the armor, the walls you’d built up, beginning to fall with each conversation, each text through the day asking how you were, each night he walked you to your door, kissing you softly, each time he listened to you, each time he let you be yourself. It was so different to anything you had ever experienced before.

Right now you and Spencer were in his apartment, your head resting on his bare chest with his arm around your waist, fingers absentmindedly drawing patterns against your skin. The air was hot but a window had been opened, letting fresh cold air in.

Being with Spencer felt like the slate was clean, you never thought about your ex anymore, you didn’t feel the bone aching sadness you tried to deny, you just felt…happy. It was like being in a state of grace. Your heart was broken after the pain and suffering at the hands of your ex but being with Spencer, it was like your heart had healed itself, all the pieces slotting back together to create a mosaic heart.

You knew you were in love with him, it would be impossible not to be. Spencer Reid was everything good in this world, even though his experiences were enough to turn anybody down a dark path, he stayed good, he stayed honest, he stayed a genuinely decent person.

Here and now, listening to Spencer as he read to you, voice low, the sound of his heartbeat in your ear…you knew love could be a ruthless game, you’d been hurt before but if you played it good and right you knew this relationship could be the best thing in your life. So far everything was going great and you didn’t intend for that to change.

It was like fate had brought the two of you together, both of you had gone through so much, you with a borderline abusive relationship and Spencer with all the horrors and torments he had gone through on the job, all that and fate decided to give you a break and bring you into each other's lives.

Your relationship with Spencer was like the golden age; it was great, it was happy and it gave you both a sense of peace. Being with each other, it was easy, sure there were arguments and there were struggles but it was a worthwhile fight to end up with each other.

Spencer looked down at you, eyes closed and lashes resting upon your cheeks. You looked beautiful despite your messy hair and flushed cheeks that remained from your earlier activities in the bed. He had known how he felt about you for a long time now but he kept putting off saying it aloud, he wanted it to be perfect. He wanted everything to be a certain way when he finally said those words. It was only after a conversation with Rossi that he realised it would never be perfect, it just had to feel right to him.

And here in this bed, you tucked against his side, this was right. This was what he wanted for the rest of his life. He wanted you. And wasn’t that an overwhelming thought at first, wasn’t that a thought that drove him into Rossi’s office to begin with, utterly panicked because he had never felt like this before. But wasn’t it an amazing thought, wasn’t this what most people spent their lives only thinking about and here he was, somehow lucky enough to find you, somehow lucky enough that you wanted him too. Wasn’t it a breathtaking thought?

Spencer had paused abruptly, causing you to look up at him. He was already looking at you, his eyes soft and a smile playing at his lips. You raised your eyebrow up at him in curiosity.

“What are you thinking about, Spence?” You asked quietly, reluctant to break the peacefulness that had settled between the two of you.

Spencer remained silent for a minute, pondering whether or not he should tell you. You watched as he raised his hand, running his knuckles along your cheek softly before turning his hand so his palm could cup your cheek, his thumb running along your cheekbone.

“I love you.” He said softly, watching as your eyes widened before a smile took over your face. He could feel your entire face shift under his hand, could feel your cheeks heat at the words.

You leaned up, softly letting your lips connect with his. Spencer didn’t hesitate in kissing you back, his other hand coming up to cup your other cheek whilst your arm lay across his waist. The kiss was slow, soft lips moving against each other, the two of you completely relaxed in each other's hold.

Though the kiss was soft and slow the two of you pulled away breathless.

“I love you too.” You confessed before attaching your lips to his again, trying to convey just how much you meant those words.

Again the two of you pulled away, breathless. Spencer pulled you against him, letting his lips rest against the top of your head before he turned and let his cheek rest there instead.

“I still don’t know how I got this lucky.” Spencer told you quietly, causing you to tighten your hold on him.

“I’m the lucky one,” you chuckled, “The day I met you I had sworn off dating, I never saw you coming and I’ll never be the same again because of you.”

Spencer pulled back, looking down at you with bright, shining eyes.

“God, I love you.” He murmured before pressing his lips to yours, the complete opposite to how he had before. This kiss was like the best kind of fireworks going off all at once, it made you hot and you kissed back with as much passion as he was given.

Thankfully both of you had the day off and spent that time showing each other just how much you loved the other.

You’d never intended to fall into a relationship again, you had thought you weren’t ready, thought you were too damaged but Spencer Reid had come along exactly when you needed him and showed you how wrong you were.

-

-

Spencer Reid Taglist - @asherhunterx, @ilovespencerreidmarryme, @canadailluminate, @nomajdetective, @reidsbookclub, @filmsbyblair, @ready-4-spencie, @mrs-scottmccall, @roseslovedreams, @j-cat, @cinderellacauseshebroke, @black-rose-29, @onlyssca, @memories-from-a-nerd, @chickensrule, @classyunknownlover, @fanf1ctionwrit1n, @frickin-bats, @grccnaway, @averyhotchner

I Almost Do

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Prompt - ‘I can't say hello to you and risk another goodbye.’

It had been an exhaustingly long case, both you and Derek being forced to act like nothing was wrong between you when in reality being around the man made you want to cry.

Things had been great between you, together for over a year, moved in with one another, things had been great. You couldn’t even pinpoint when things had started going bad, you just remembered that the two of you were arguing more, you remembered that in the last few months you’d spent more time in the guest bedroom than you did in your own.

The tension between the two of you eventually seeped into your work life and Hotch had taken to keeping the two of you as far away from each other as he could whereas he usually paired you with each other for most assignments, knowing how well the two of you worked together.

Derek was the one to finally put an end to the relationship after months of fighting, months of faking smiles and telling everyone things were fine, everyone had rough patches, after months of sleeping alone and days without talking to one another.

“We can’t do this anymore Y/N,” He had snapped one day, the two of you were arguing in the kitchen. Hateful words thrown at each other in the heat of the moment. Derek sighed before softening his voice and repeating, “We can’t do this anymore.”

You blinked against the tears, you knew he was right but it didn’t mean you wanted it to end. All you wanted was for the fighting to stop, you didn’t even know what you were fighting over anymore. You’d never fallen out of love with Derek, you still loved him more than anything but ultimately you knew he was right.

“I know,” You replied, voice just as soft as his.

You watched his face fall, your expression mirroring his as you both came to terms with the fact your relationship was just over.

Derek took a step closer to you, lifting his hand to cup your face, giving you plenty of time to pull away before he dipped his head down and let his mouth connect with yours.

It was then you let the tears fall, the saltiness could be tasted on both your lips as he kissed you softly, trying not to let his own tears fall.

When he pulled away he rested his forehead on yours, looking at your face he couldn’t help but let a single tear fall as he brushed yours away.

“I love you baby.” He whispered, causing you to scrunch your nose up as you tried desperately to stop more tears from coming.

“I love you too,” You told him, nodding slightly as you did.

From then on everything became tense. You and Derek didn’t know how to act around each other. Hotch continued to keep you separate and the two of you avoided each other as best you could and you did quite a good job considering the close quarters you worked in.

Emily hadn’t hesitated to offer you her spare bedroom as you looked for your own apartment and she watched as you fell apart after rough cases, the only thing that could help was the one person you couldn’t have.

Sometimes Derek reached out, a phone call or a text, but you never replied. As much as you loved him, and you did love him more than words could say, you couldn’t say hello to him again and risk another goodbye. You knew he probably hadn’t even considered that but the first breakup was so painful, you couldn’t go through it again.

Tonight though it took everything in you not to call him. Tonight you just wanted to be with him, his arms secure around your waist, holding you tightly, his touch grounding you. You wanted him to kiss your forehead and whisper sweet nothings that always made you feel better.

But you didn’t call or text him. You didn’t get in your car and drive to the place you once called home. There were so many times where you had nearly given in, nearly gone to him, almost done it, but you resisted.

The thought of having him back just to lose him again was far too painful.

You knew in some ways that it was probably for the best the two of you had parted ways before you ruined everything with each other forever. At least calling it quits when you did meant there may have been a possibility, somewhere down the line, there was a chance you could reconnect, be friends again, be in the same room without any tension.

It had been an exhaustingly long case, both you and Derek being forced to act like nothing was wrong between you when in reality being around the man made you want to cry. You bet at this time of night that Derek was still up, just as tired as you after a long, hard week. You bet he was sitting in that chair by the window, looking out at the view, in the seat that you had both once occupied, you in his lap with his arms holding you securely.

You hoped he was thinking about you as much as you were thinking about him, you hoped he missed you as much as you missed him. You hoped one day that the two of you would be ready to find each other again and this time not let each other go.

______________

Derek Taglist - @canadailluminate, @mrs-scottmccall, @j-cat , @cinderellacauseshebroke, @black-rose-29, @chickensrule, @classyunknownlover, @rosaliedepp, @cassidymb121, @grccnaway, @averyhotchner, @chaoticevilbakugo, @sia2raw, @silverose365, @ellevandeberg, @taecube, @alexxavicry, @parkershoco, @father-violet,

IN RUINS

PAIRING: spencer reid x fem reader

SUMMARY: spencer reid has always had something against you. during a particular case, spencer snaps and says something he shouldn’t have said leaving you in ruins. but what happens when your in danger and he still hasn’t explained why he reacted the way he did. will he have the time?

“ what happened?” hotch says standing infront of the big white board that had some very gruesome pictures of 5 victims splayed out on a park bench. he’s standing tall and strong with his hands crossed in his dark grey suit. he’s looking at you and spencer, who’s walking in right behind you slamming the door close.

“ It’s her fault.” spencer says quickly moving to the other side of the room opposite you, trying to get as far away from you as possible.

you take a deep breath in trying your absolute hardest not to roll your eyes and cross your hands in annoyance and disappointment. “ it’s not my fault reid-”

“ woah woah what the heck happened?” morgan says pushing himself back in the precinct chair watching you and spencer. he looks at spencer, he sees the strong look of disgust and annoyance spencer is shooting at you. he looks at you, he notices you looking at spencer with a disappointed look.

“ she told the unsubs family we are after the unsub-” spencer spits out looking over at hotch, waiting for him to yell at you or lecture you.

“ wait spence we don’t even know who the unsub is. what do you mean?” jj says turning her head to look at spencer confusion written on her face. “ exactly! thank you jj!” you reply throwing your hands up.

“ michael miller is our unsub hotch.” spencer says completely ignoring your attempt to reason with him, his eyes stay on hotch waiting for him to snap at you or just lecture you. “ wait a minute i thought michael miller had a solid alibi.” morgan says laying back in his chair resting his arms on the arm rests. “ he does have a solid alibi it checks out-” spencer cuts you off. “ it does not check out!” spencer says.

“ yes it does! hotch we asked his dad who confirmed his son came home at 8:30 pm from football practice.” you say growing impatient looking at hotch, hotch’s eyebrows are furrowed tightly. his arms are still crossed listening to you and spencer bicker back and fourth.

“ just because his dad showed the tiniest bit of concern about his son when the fbi showed up to his doorstep does not make him a reliable source, just because you never had a dad who showed any bit of concern and now when you finally see a dad care about their kid does not mean you should not fall into their trap just because you never had a trap to fall into.” spencer spits out finally looking at you.

he watches as your expression hardens. he watches as humiliation and embarrassment fill your once determined eyes, the determined eyes who tried to reason with spencer at-least 4 minutes ago. 4 minutes, that’s how long it takes for your perspective of someone to change. he watches as your eyebrows tremble, a habit you have when your trying to fight back tears. he watches as your throat trembles too, probably trying to fight back that agonising choke you get when your about to cry.

the entire room goes quiet. spencers gaze remains on you, slowly watching your soul shatter because of his words. your gaze remains on spencer, slowly feeling your soul shatter because of his words.

the door that spencer slammed close 4 minutes ago opens, rossi and emily walking in. “ michael millers alibi checks out. we’ve got pictures of him at football practice from 5pm to 8:25pm. he wouldn’t have had the time to commit the murders.” rossi says opening the door for emily. “ also his teammates described him as an extrovert and outgoing which is not what we profiled the unsub to be.” emily says with her hands inside her pockets nodding looking at everyone surrounding the table.

“ i feel as though we interrupted something.” rossi says eyeing everyone in the room raising an eyebrow in confusion. he could feel the tension. emily could too. which is why she immediately looks over at morgan for answers. morgan looks at her for a split second before returning his gaze on you.

“ y/n-” spencer attempts. he tries to bring himself to take a step towards you, but it’s like his words somehow built a barrier between you and him that he now can’t even physically cross. or maybe he’s just scared that if he takes a step towards you, you’ll take a step back. away from him.

you swallow the gut wrenching feeling of tears crawling up your throat. you look down to your converse. “ i’m gonna go…uhm get coffee.” you say turning around immediately walking towards the door. “ excuse me.” you whisper pushing past rossi and emily.

“ oh wonder boy..” garcia says through the tv screen, her bright purple tinted lips which usually wear a bright smile on her face now wearing a frown. her tone disappointed as she presses her heart eye fuzzy emoji pen into her cheek. “ i uhm did my usual background checking on the uhm..list of potential unsubs and a uhm…scott anderson has a sketchy background. i’ve just sent his file to you my pretties.” garcia says stuttering quite a few times finding it hard to sneak her usually bubbly nicknames into the conversation after what had just happened. “ thank you garcia. jj take y/n and check out scott anderson.” hotch says looking at jj his arms finally by his side.

jj nods standing up walking towards the door “ i-i can go” spencer says turning his body towards jj. “ stay.” hotch replies his voice stern and bold. he looks at spencer his eyebrows furrowed.

jj closes the door. “ sit.” hotch says to spencer pointing to the empty seat at the table, spencer slowly walks towards the seat sitting down. “ you shouldn’t have said that spencer.” hotch says crossing his hands. “ hotch-” spencer attempts but is quickly cut off, “ i’m not finished. I get it. your worried spencer. your scared-”

“ hotch-” spencer is cut off once again. “ you may think your hiding it well spencer but your not. we know the unsub is targeting female victims which have similar features to l/n. if your too close to the case spencer-” it’s spencer’s turn to now cut hotch off. “ but i’m not too close to the case hotch!” spencer replies. he wanted the similarities between you and the victims to only be in his head because he wanted only him, himself to notice the similarities between you and the victims. you both have the same hair color, hair length, both considered to be attractive, both have similar personalities, and similar taste in clothing. he didn’t want it to be true. but now he knows that they are, and they’re not just in his head he’s even more worried.

“ your stuttering spencer. you do that when your worried or nervous.” emily says pulling a chair from the table. spencer shoots his eyes away from hotch to emily’s. his gaze softens a bit, emily’s tone wasn’t like hotchs. it wasn’t as stern or bold. it was rather understanding and gentle. “ i just cant control myself around her.” spencer says looking down at the picture of the fourth victim who had been wearing the exact same pair of converse your wearing now. “ well your going to have to learn how to control yourself pretty boy. you shouldn’t have said that.” morgan says looking at spencer. spencer sighs hiding his face in his hands. “ i just..god i’m so stupid.” spencer groans rubbing his tired eyes.

“ stupidity is what ended my third marriage.” rossi says crossing his hands leaning against the bulletin board with a small chuckle, morgan looks at rossi and laughs. “ well thank god pretty boy isn’t married. he’d be the new rossi.” morgan says tilting his head to the side looking at spencer trying to lighten the mood, spencer who still has his head in his hands. there’s a million thoughts going through his head, all of them are about you. all of them are about how he should apologize. is he even allowed to apologize? will you let him apologize to you? would you accept his apology? what if you didn’t? did he just ruin his friendship with you? no screw friendship, he doesn’t just want to be friends. he wouldn’t be as sensitive as he is to this case if he just wanted to remain friends. he’s in love with you. spencer reid is in love with you. and he just potentially ruined any slight chance of ever having you know that he loves you. just because he’s stupid and didn’t think before he spoke.

“ are you okay?” jj says both hands on the steering wheel turning around to look at you next to her, in the passenger seat. your heads turnt towards the window, your picking at your nails. a habit of yours. you turn to look at jj and nod. “ yeah i’m fine why wouldn’t i be?” you ask tilting your head to the side with a confusing smile. you know exactly why your not okay. but for some reason, you just can’t bring yourself to actually be upset over it. what’s there to be upset about? what spencer said is true. he’s not wrong. why are you making excuses for him? what he said was not okay. totally not okay. why do you have to make excuses for every male figure in your life for when they’ve done something wrong? why do you always make them the victim and you the villain. you just don’t wanna lose them right? because you know that if your the victim and their the villain they’ll never apologise and the entire relationship will disappear, it always does.

“ what spencer said-” jj is talking in that tone, that tone that she would speak in whenever something was wrong. in a motherly kind of tone. you immediately shake your head, “ it’s- it’s fine jj really, i don’t care. can we just please forget it ever happened? lets just work on the case.” you say running a hand through your hair biting your lower lip trying to stop your voice from trembling, you know when your about to cry and you have that heavy feeling in your throat? you swallow it hard. you turn your head to look at the window not waiting for a response from jj. jj clears her throat, “ no yeah of course.” she nods smiling turning her head back around.

“ this should be it…” jj mumbles stopping the car, parked infront of a 2 story cabin. you unbuckle your seatbelt and open the car door. “ it looks like no one’s home, there’s no car. we profiled that the unsub would have a van or a truck..” jj says closing the car door looking at the house. “ maybe he wouldn’t leave something so valuable to him outside, to the eye of the public. he’s possessive he thinks the entire world revolves around him he probably thinks someone would try to steal it.” you reply reaching in your pocket for your id. jj doing the same thing. you two walk to the front door, you in the front,

you knock on the door. you put your hand against your hip waiting for the door to open. “ we should ask the neighbours. maybe they’ll know-” you knock on the door again. “ scott anderson. fbi.” you say knocking on the door again. jj puts both of her hands on her waist. “ looks like he’s not home-” your cut off by the door swinging open.

you immediately turn your head around. “ scott anderson?” you ask looking at the man infront of you. you know it’s scott anderson, penelope had already sent his id picture on the drive over. he looks at you, then looks at jj. “ who are you..” he says looking directly at jj. “ i’m agent l/n with the fbi and this is agent jareau. do you mind if we come inside?” you ask smiling holding up your id.

he doesn’t even bother looking at your id. “ yeah whatever.” he moves to the side, making room for you and jj. you nod turning around to look at jj. she nods. you step inside jj following you.

“ do you live alone?” you ask analysing the house, its organised. weird for someone that’s his age. “ uhm yeah i do. what’s wrong with that?” he asks crossing his hands. you chuckle, “ no no nothings wrong with that, i also lived alone when i was 17.” you reply smiling. “ i’m 19.” he says looking at you, eyeing you up and down smiling. “ your pretty organised for a 19 year old.” jj says raising an eyebrow also crossing her hands smiling. “ guess i was just raised that way.” he replies rubbing his lips together. you nod. “ how were you raised scott..if you don’t mind me asking.” you say looking around the house. “ yeah scott how did you manage to score such a house at your age. do you work?” jj asks grabbing a picture frame. “ no i don’t work-” he turns to look at jj. “ put that down.” he snaps speed walking to jj. you immediately reach for your gun.

“ right..sorry. you don’t like people touching your stuff.” jj replies throwing her hands up in defeat. he snatches the picture frame. he grabs it caressing it gently, jj looks at you with wide eyes. you raise an eyebrow in confusion. “ scott. why do you have a picture of my colleague framed?” jj asks looking at the frame scott’s holding. your eyes widen.

“ oh god oh god. where’s y/n and jj?” penelope says aggressively tapping on her keyboard. “ what? what’s wrong?” spencer is the first to respond shooting up from the office chair just at the mention of your name. “ they’re at scott anderson’s why?” hotch says turning around, away from the white board to the tv. garcia starts tearing up, “ i-i did some deep digging and scott anderson has a blog about y/n..” garcia says in a shaky tone. no. no. no. no. no not again please.

his heart stopped for a split second. his hand start sweating. the air has been sucked out of his lungs. why is it so hard to breathe? why is there no air to breathe? there’s a million thoughts running through his head, they’re still about you. but now they’re worse. your in danger. your with the unsub. the unsub who has already killed five people. your in the same house with the unsub. the unsub who has a blog dedicated to you. and the last time you saw spencer you were teary eyed. no it can’t be the last time. no. please be safe.

his sweaty shaky hands reach for his phone. he clicks on your contact. hotch grabs his phone and immediately calls jj. spencer immediately puts the phone up against his ear. it rings. rossi and emily immediately stand up, “ penelope send us the address to scott’s house now.” emily says walking to the door. it’s still ringing. spencer starts biting his nails. his hearts pounding. the ringing of the phone case is haunting him. what is happening on the other side of the phone. why aren’t you answering. you always answer the phone. why is it still ringing? y/n why aren’t you answering.

“ god damn it!” spencer shouts into the phone as it keeps ringing. morgan stands up, “ hotch we gotta go.” he says standing up shoving his phone into his pocket.

the ringing stops. spencer’s heart stops. his breathing stops. everyone in the room looks at spencer waiting for any kind of confirmation. “ y/n you’ve gotta get out of there with jj!” spencer says stuttering with a shaky voice. hes scared. hes so so scared. hes never been more scared in his life. it’s quiet. why is it quiet? why aren’t you answering? what’s wrong. god y/n.

“ hey mom.” you reply. spencer takes a deep breath in. he stops biting his nails. he wipes his wet fingers on his pants. his hearts racing. your in danger. why are you calling him mom if your not in danger. oh god. he feels like he can’t breathe again. he can’t focus. he can’t do this. he can’t do this. he can’t do this without you. breathe spencer. she’s in danger spencer. she’s all that matters.

“ y/n. god i…” he chokes. “ you already figured it out didn’t you.” he says his throat feeling scratchy. he hears you giggle on the other side of the phone, your laugh erupts the butterflies in his stomach. under any other circumstances he would absolutely hate the butterflies in his stomach and would be mad at you for making him feel such way. but now they bring a sense of comfort, they make him feel normal for a split second. that this is not that big of a deal, he’s just calling the girl he really likes and he got butterflies from hearing her beautiful laughs.

“ yeah of course. i called aunt lizzie for her birthday mom i’m not stupid.” you respond. god your voice is so beautiful, but he can hear it. he can fear the slight fear in your voice. maybe other people wouldn’t hear it, but he can. spencer can. and it’s killing him. it’s tearing his heart apart. it’s making his legs shake. “ d-did he hurt you- is he gonna hurt you?” spencer says gripping his jeans tightly. he hears you laugh again, “ yeah mom.” you say.

he feels his legs going weak.

“Why Worry?”

This is a Fandom Insert as well as a reader one. I will be using Supernatural, Criminal Minds, and Marvel as examples, because they the ones I am currently obsessed with and I feel they fit the different fandoms well. (Sherlock? NCIS? Criminal Minds. Anything superheroes? Marvel. Buffy the Vampire, Teen Wolf, or anything of the sort? Supernatural.) This is a song-fic of the Set It Off’s Why Worry, and as in the music video, there are two of you.

Warnings: Don’t trust the narrative. Violence, battle gore, and such. Cursing.

Word Count - 1203

Dyed haired, freckled, dimpled, slight accent, and any skin-toned Reader. (Non-binary, interchanging pronouns with a realistic jiggly body)

Sorry, in advance, Blonde, blue-eyed, white chicks that are reading this.

As of late, you haven’t recognized yourself in the mirror. You’re slim, with a clean face, no marks anywhere. You’re exactly what you always dreamed to be. “Yeah, right.” Frick, that voice, it must exist to annoy you. Seriously. It was nothing like your previous demons, though. It seemed to almost be something else... Screw it. Let’s think of this another time. You finally get to go on a mission, a case, that they had never allowed you to go on before. The nerves “started” eating at you, harshly. You have been thinking about it all night, but you slept like a baby, probably looked like one too.

You felt a tap on your shoulder, the owner most likely predicting how you were feeling. People have been reading you like an open book. “They haven’t before.” “The sinking feeling sets.” You mumble, talking to shut up the sound from continuing. You almost started to proceed to, well, feel whole again as you kept talking, but not as sure as to why you are feeling this way. “It feels like a hole inside your chest.” The guy nods as you look up to them. It was exactly who you expect, the one person that you feel that you could confide in, (Your Favorite male Character).

Before he could try to ease your tenseness with his words, your team leader starts going over the plan.

Did you pay attention? The best you could, because your body started to feel, what is the termination... “Can’t find the correct words? Wow, you really are feeling out of it.” He is talking a lot more often- With that your ocean waves started to close, your body plagued with sudden fatigue, and 

black.

You arose without air, holding your big chest. You ran your hand through your natty hair, NATTY? How long were you out? “I know what you’re thinking.” Shut up. “No, no, no, no. I can’t have messy hair!” the voice mocked. Okay, ignore them, (Y/N), you got a job to do. Just join, I guess. “Easier said than done.” “Not helping,” You said out loud, annoyed. You grab your weapon, something that still felt foreign to you. Even before “everything changed.” You never felt like you needed it. “I know you hate me, but please, let me attest, on how you should go about this.” Never.

After a while, it didn’t take you that long but you were focused more on the argument in your head. You ran into so many things and even went in the wrong direction, however, your skin remained clear without any bruises. You managed your way into the compound, from a complete hidden entrance. At every camera, that you knew that wasn’t being looked at if your earpiece was anything to go off of, you winked. You were in your element, which you haven’t felt in a long time. You didn’t feel the stereotypical emotions, the reason why is beyond you, at the moment anyway. Found it, “It” being the Security Camera room, not the answer to any of your questions. You walk in and grabbed the woman, who was obviously the boss’s wife. “Relax.” (Skipping some lyrics, because of gees.) She didn’t but acted as calm as she could. She had her pistol aimed at you, but it was clear to anyone that she had never shot a gun before, let alone hold one. If that stance was anything to go off of. “Tell me,” You smirked, hitting the microphone button, “Why? Please, tell me, why do we worry? Huh, my dear?”

“I-I don’t-” 

“Why? When worry is never helping, tell me!” 

“I-I- What?” 

“Let’s take you to your mob wifey.”

You quickly link your earpiece to the intercoms.

“Let’s take these issues, step by step by step-“

Perks with being friends with nerds!

“To work it out. Day by day, by day, we’re falling down.“

What? No, we knew how to do that! That is basic programming.

“But life goes on!“

“Basic programming”? Who the fuck do you think you are? I didn’t know that.

You? I? What-

You kick down the door, with your arm around the mistress. “Hello~! We were feeling kind of left out, forgotten. We wanted some action too~!” Your voice teased your tied up comrades and sworn enemies. It sounded like you, but you wouldn’t say that- “I’ve got some questions.” 

“Questions, yes! Ask away!” the leader shouted, not liking the weapon near her wife. “Are you sick of feelin’ sorry?” you asked, accent and all. “People saying ‘Not to worry’?! Sick of hearin’ this hakuna matata motto crap from people who won the lottery?” “We’re not that lucky.” The mobster answered, honestly. You nodded, “Have you noticed that you’re breathing?” Your arm left the terrified woman, looking at both of the groups. “Look around! Count your blessings,” You started to yell at them, walking around every individual. “So, when you’re sick of all this stressin’ and guessin’, I’m suggesting!” You were going to leave it at that, but your mouth to seemed to start continuing on itself, “Chin up.” Your body moving on its own. You brought your best friend’s face up by his chin, “Quit actin’ like you’re half dead.” You winked, as you continue and walked over to your crush, that is a man- Yeah, no, that is a bad-ass woman with a beautiful smile. “Tears can only half fill how you’re feelin’. Baby, don’t worry, be happy.” You proceed to gesture to rest of your family to stand up, just to hear the leader join in, “Stand up, life is too damn short.” “That clock is ticking.” You added, as she finishes your verse, “Man up if ya feel me.” “Everyone sing it!”

As everyone starts to sing, you hear “Fine, you win.” You smirked and turned around to face the woman you used to see in the mirror. You wink as you started to ruffle your hair to make it fall in your own face, your dyed lock fell over your (e/c) eyes. Your smirk gets bigger as you saw your arms jiggly as you clapped along to your family and new friends’ music.

“You might’ve been considered perfect, but not to me. That guy in the mirror is me, this jiggly body could get insulted by people like you and I will still be the better person.“

“Now, you’re full of yourself, (Y/N)“

“That’s your Highness, because bitch, ‘m perfect.“

That you are.

Soft mornings

{Mornings with Spencer Reid are a rare but welcomed thing}

I finally started watching CM!! and this my first time writing for Spencer so I’m kinda nervous! Anyway, I hope you enjoy my lovelies!! 💕💕

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The sun peaks from between the pewter grey clouds, slipping between the gasp in the curtains as it casts beams of light across the bedroom, spilling up the walls and ceiling, a calm breeze pushes through the open window that you must’ve forgotten to shut last night, a mistake you come to feel grateful for, as you snuggle closer to a snoring Spencer Reid.

You smile at the way his hands find themselves dipping underneath your shirt settling against your belly, smoothing over to rest on your waist. He mumbles something completely incoherent as he nuzzles himself into the crook of your neck and it’s only when his lips graze against your ear do you hear the quiet words, ‘Good morning’.

“Good morning angel” you whisper as he nuzzles his nose against your shoulder laughing at the sweet nickname that makes his chest feel all fluttery.

His fingers trace mindless patterns against your skin, “How are you so warm?” He asks, shivering slightly as the morning coldness seeps into the room, his legs entangled with yours as he tries to cipher your body heat.

You giggle as you gently run your fingers through his tangled bed hair, “Maybe it’s because my six foot one boyfriend practically sleeps on top of me” you tease, feeling the way he smirks against your shoulder.

He meekly shakes his head in disagreement, knowing all too well that what you’re saying isn’t very far from a lie, he doesn’t say anything, instead, he basks in the warmth of your body, his heart so full of love as your arms wrap around him keeping him from moving, not that he’d want to.

“Well you forgot to shut the window- maybe you like it” he quips nuzzling himself impossibly closer to you, and you can’t help the giggle that falls from your lips, a sound Spencer could never get bored of.

A minute or so passes as you both lay wrapped up with each other, enjoying the loving warmth that blankets the pair of you, it’s safe here in your arms, he thinks to himself as you lean to pepper ticklish kisses to his shoulders.

“Do you want coffee?” You ask, smiling as he looks up at you with those pretty brown eyes of his, his lips stretched into a tight smile, and you can’t help but admire the morning sun that speckles over his face.

“Hmm- yes, please” he can feel himself blush at the way you marvel at him and he can’t quite believe that you’re actually looking at him, like that, like he means the world to you, and he does.

He closes his eyes as you lean to press a kiss to the small beauty mark that sits above his eyebrow, a habit of yours he picked up on quite early, and the soft feeling makes his heart melt.

“Yeah that means you’re going to have to release me Spence” you smile as he rest his head against your chest.

“Oh- Right, sorry-” he gives you a breathy giggle as he untangles himself from you, watching as you climb out of the bed to only slip on a jumper to savour the little heat you have, and you disappear out the bedroom door.

Spencer suddenly misses the warmth, misses you, which is stupid because he knows you’re in the kitchen making him his morning coffee, but that doesn’t stop the yearning that overcomes his heart, a yearning that only you seem to have the power to stop and so he stretches before following you into the kitchen.

You’re humming some tune as you plop three teaspoons of sugar into the hot beverage stirring carefully as you tap your fingers against the marbled countertops to some tune you have stuck in your head.

Spencer can’t help but watch from the doorframe with love in his eyes, he clears his throat making himself known before he walks up behind you, his arms wrap around your waist and his hands dip underneath your shirt as they settle against your belly.

“Missed me already?” You ask as he peppers soft kisses against your jaw.

“I always miss you love” he whispers, resting his chin on your shoulder and you feel yourself go giddy at the softness that bleeds into his tone.

There’s a certain heaviness to his words that you’re both aware of, time was a precious thing for you and Spencer and you knew that going into the relationship, so it made mornings like this much more special.

You turn around to face him your hands cupping either side of his jaw, “Well it’s a good job we’ve got the whole day together, huh?” Your thumb grazes along his warm cheek as you press a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth, he nods stuttering a quiet ‘y-yeah it is’.

Spending mornings together without the pressure of getting to work on time was such a rare thing that it felt so odd whenever you got days off, the peaceful atmosphere that settles over the both of you was strange but certainly not unwelcome.

You weren't racing against time today. You try to rack your head for ideas of how to spend your day off together as you sit down next to him at the table, “Hm, the whole day with Spencer Reid, what a pleasure” he turns to face you with a bashful smile, “Is there anything you want to do?” You ask, watching as he contemplates the question.

“Um, I-I don’t mind as long as I’m with you,” he says with a soft chuckle, wincing at the way his voice quivers ever so slightly, and you can’t help the butterflies.

You giggle, brushing your hand against his warm cheek, noticing the redness that tints his face and he doesn’t hesitate to lean into your loving touch.

“Real smooth Spence” you tease tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.

“Thanks- I try my best,” he says taking a sip of his coffee, his hand entwining with yours as you both listen in on the small radio that plays.

“Well, why don’t we start with breakfast first?” You suggest and he nods, with that look in his eyes, the same look he gives before he goes off rambling.

“Yes, we should actually, breakfast is considered the most important meal of the day as it replenishes your supply of glucose to boost your energy levels and alertness, while also providing other essential nutrients required for good health— in fact, a study-“ he catches himself, clearing his throat.

Spencer swears his heart stops as you look at him with the kindest eyes he’s ever seen, you’re really listening to him, “Right, breakfast, we should- we should have breakfast” he smiles as you press a kiss to his forehead.

“Blueberry pancakes?” You suggest watching as his eyes light up with excitement and he quickly stands up with you as he gathers the ingredients.

You nudge his hip with yours gently as he stumbles out of your way as you take the blueberries from the fridge, “Oh- remember to actually wait until it’s finishing cooking before you go all flip crazy” he reminds you as you scoff playfully at him.

“Oh come on, that was one time Spence” you huff, he helps you prepare the pancake batter with shared laughter as you both make an inevitable mess of the countertops, and there is no one else he’d rather spend his days off with than you.

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Nightmares

{You have a nightmare on the jet and Spencer comforts you}

Hope you enjoy lovelies!! 💕

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Nightmares were something that practically comes hand in hand with your job, I mean it was only natural that you would get them. Hotch said himself that he would be more worried if you didn’t get them and you suppose he’s right.

They were never easy to get through, the overwhelming weight that sits against your chest or how your heart seems to completely freeze with fear in your rib cage. You can’t really do anything to stop your own mind from betraying you.

If you had known that one of these particular nightmares would invade your exhausted mind you might’ve thought twice before sleeping on the jet's sofa.

You were curled up, knees tucked towards your chest with Spencer's cardigan draped over you as you slept. Spencer didn’t sleep instead he chose to fiddle with the pack of cards, flicking through them, silently thinking. He would occasionally glance over to you making sure you were okay.

He was observant, he noticed the way your eyebrows pulled together with an almost painful expression, how your lip quivered ever so slightly and his chest tightened at the pitiful whimpers that were muffled behind your clenched teeth.

He’s quick to kneel beside the sofa, rushing to your side. His fingers brush against your warm cheek as he tries to coax you from your nightmare. And he’s glad for your sake that everyone has fallen asleep, not that you should be ashamed, he’s told you millions of times there’s nothing to be ashamed about, but yet the mind is a very complex thing.

He watches in panic as your breathing becomes more and more erratic, and he feels hopeless. There’s nothing he can do but entwine his hand with yours hoping that it would bring you some kind of comfort.

“You’re okay, I’m right here” he whispers, keeping his voice down as he glances over his shoulder.

Emily was resting her head against JJ’s shoulder, both sleeping despite the uncomfortable position. Hotch, Derek even Gideon had all fallen asleep. He couldn’t blame them, tonight had dragged on for what felt like years.

It always seemed to be the same thing, your nightmares. Running towards something and never getting there fast enough and recently it had been Spencer that plages your mind. His voice calls for you weakly somewhere within the abyss and to try so hard to get to him, but your attempts are fruitless, and all you were met with are horrid images of him.

You gasp, scrambling to sit up with your shaky hand against your chest, your eyes brimming with tears as you look down at Spencer, sighing in relief, he's okay. He sits next to you a cautious smile etched onto his lips.

“I’ve got you- you’re okay,” he says as he holds you close, his arms wrapped securely around your body as you take deep breaths, your head resting against his shoulder.

He can feel your heartbeat and the way your shoulders shake as you try to stifle the cries that fall from your lips, his hand soothes the expanse of your back as he rests his chin on the top of your head.

“Spence, I- I can’t- I couldn’t” Your voice is hoarse and strained, and the sound sends pain ricocheting throughout his chest and it only makes him hold you tighter.

He presses a delicate kiss to your temple before he pulls away slightly, his hands gently grasping at your forearms as he studies your teary face.

“I’m okay, see? I’m right here” he promises taking your shaky hands, bringing them to cup either side of his face, "We're almost home". He knows your fears and how they seep into your subconscious mind, most importantly how they all seem to revolve around him.

It hurts him to know that he’s the cause of your worries and it hurts him even more knowing that he can’t really do anything, but what he can do is comfort you when they get bad, to bring you back to shore and hold you close to him, and he does without complaint. He loves taking care of you.

You nod your head as your thumb grazes along his cheek. Your eyes scan over his face, “I’m sorry” you whisper, resting your hands on his lap as he holds them, his thumb smoothing over the curves of your knuckles.

He looks at you with slight confusion, “No, you don't have to apologise- it’s what I’m here for” The compassion that bleeds into his tone and the way his gentle eyes never leave yours makes your chest tighten.

Spencer Reid was the kindest person you’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting, he had so much love to give. You were so happy that he shared his love with you.

He smiles as he wipes away the stray tears, “I love you Spencer” you whisper, leaning your forehead against his.

“I love you too” he presses a loving kiss to the corner of your mouth before pulling away. He taps his lap motioning for you to rest your head and you do so, enjoying the way he gently plays with your hair.

He looks down at you with love-filled eyes, “I’m right here- with you, I promise, I’m not going anywhere” he tells you, watching how you fight the sleep that hangs over you like a storm cloud.

You decide to trust his words, letting yourself relax into his touch as he drapes his cardigan back over your shoulders, and you both soon find yourselves in a dreamless sleep.

The jet will land soon, and you’ll both be woken by the teasing words of your friends. If you both knew that then maybe the pair of you would’ve thought twice before falling asleep on the jet's sofa together.

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Missing Lego bricks

{You come home to Spencer losing his mind over Lego pieces}

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Spencer, for the most part, is a level-headed person that’s what he likes to think at least. But right now at this moment, he thinks he might just go insane. He’s looked everywhere, in every nook and cranny of his living room and he’s starting to regret all of the books he leaves haphazardly around.

You had got him the typewriter Lego set for his birthday, and he was completely over the moon. In fact, he had even cried a little at the heartfelt gift, it was the first time in a while where his birthday didn’t feel like such a dreadful experience.

He remembers it so very fondly. How your eyes glistened with excitement as you watch him unwrap the present, the way your eyes crinkled with joy. He had rambled off about the history of typewriters to you a couple of times and in all honesty, it warmed his heart to know that you actually listen to him.

“Baby? I’m home” you call out hanging your coat on the hanger as walk further into his apartment. He would have greeted you and helped you with your coat and bags whilst sneaking in a shy kiss or two, but he was completely and utterly hung up on this lost Lego piece, he’s starting to think it might’ve just simply disappeared.

You smile, standing in the archway, he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose before threading his fingers through his hair, his eyes scanning over the floor.

“You lost something?” You ask, and he perks up with surprise as if he didn’t even hear you come in.

He's quick to grab the instruction manual off the floor before jogging over to you, tripping over the stack of books that sit beside the coffee table. “This one- I’ve looked everywhere baby and I can’t find it, it’s just gone,” he tells you, pointing to the rouge piece of Lego.

You look over to the half-built typewriter noticing the way he had separated the different parts into small piles.

“Well it’s gotta be around here somewhere,” you tell him and he sighs, looking at you with disbelief.

Spencer is adamant as he shakes his head, “It’s not- it’s just poof, gone” he explains, his hands gesturing in every which way as he tries to get his point across. And you can’t stop the little giggle that slips from your lips, he looks like he’s going to lose it.

“Don’t laugh- this is a serious problem” he tells you watching as you cover your mouth with your hand, trying to stifle your laughter.

“Okay, I’ll help you find it,” you tell him as he thanks you softly, pressing a kiss to your cheek. You both search for the tiny piece of plastic for a good minute or so. Moving the furniture around as you check in every corner of the room, looking behind all the books.

Then it hits you as you look over at the couch, “Have you looked under the sofa yet?” You ask. He frowns pushing the sleeves of his jumper up to his elbows as he scoffs at you.

“Looked under the sofa? Yes of course I did” he says, and you can tell from the way he fiddles with the strings of his jumper and the smirk that teeters on his lips that he’s lying.

You go and make some snarky comment something along the lines of ‘for a genius that was pretty dumb’ he could already hear it before the sentence could even leave your lips.

“Don’t even say anything” he says, a playful look flicking through his eyes as you purse your lips trying to stop the growing smile. You watch as he walks over to the sofa carefully stepping over the Legos that were neatly placed on the floor.

He picks up the edge of the sofa lifting it up slightly with a small grunt as you check underneath the couch and there it was a small grey Lego brick.

“Got it!- there you go pretty boy” You hand him the piece of plastic, watching as his eyes light up he. He thanks you as he walks back over to his place on the floor.

You join him on the wooden floor, your thigh against his knee as you watch him as he continues to build the typewriter, “Can I help you?” You ask, handing him the bricks.

He looks over at you, admiring just how pretty you are with those love-filled doe eyes of his. He presses a kiss to your temple. “Yeah of course you can sweetheart” he tells you, shuffling to make room for you.

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AN/ just wanna say that my requests are open! {I can also write for Emily Prentiss!} 💕

Candlelit kisses

{When your apartment complex loses power you and Spencer have a sleepover leading you to both share your first kiss}

It’s a long one. Hope you enjoy lovelies!! 💕

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The last thing you were expecting today was a power cut this late into the night, and perhaps that’s why you let out a little yelp with a jump when Spencer knocks at your door causing you to almost drop the small tealight that you were lighting.

“Hey, is your power out too?” You ask, and he nods with a slightly frustrated sigh, his eyebrows knit together as he tries not to drop the papers and books he’s holding against his chest.

You and Spencer have been neighbours for a while now and somewhere along the line, you two got closer. He would come over almost every Friday, sometimes he even stayed over, well more like he would accidentally fall asleep and you never had the heart to wake him up.

“I can’t work like this” he complains walking into your apartment as he drops his work onto your kitchen table. You can practically feel the stress radiating from him as he rolls his shoulders, it was strange seeing him so tensed up.

You walk over to him with a flashlight, “Well hello to you too Spencer, oh yeah no, my day has been good” you sarcastically ramble, and he lets out a dry chuckle looking over at you as you sit down next to him.

“Sorry, I just— it’s a big inconvenience” he sighs once again as he rakes his fingers through his hair. Your hand rests on his shoulder as you give him a gentle look, soothing his arm.

You flick the flashlight on illuminating the table, “Yeah you’re telling me— but hey, I could be your very own personal lamp” you say trying to lighten up the mood, but your attempts are fruitless, and you frown when he shakes his head with a heavy sigh.

In all honesty, Spencer doesn’t want to do any work tonight. He wants to play silly board games with you, only to catch you cheating horribly and watch as you try and defend yourself through a fit of giggles. He wants, more than anything, to just hold you and go to sleep.

“Sorry, I just barged in here complaining- I’ll- I'll leave” he panics slightly. Your relationship is still new, everything felt so thrilling and Spencer is terrified of messing up somehow because he's so insanely in love with you. He doesn’t want to lose this feeling or you, ever.

“Spencer what?— don’t be silly, I don’t mind you staying here you know that” You try to stop him from gathering up his stuff but he’s stubborn as he makes his way towards your door, completely ignoring you.

He stops when you tug on his elbow, “Don’t leave, please” you mumble deciding to swallow your pride, “It’s really dark in here and I don’t want to be alone” you whisper, feeling a little childish but it was true nonetheless.

Your apartment was completely engulfed in darkness, the only thing lighting it was the small tealights that you scattered around, and the cool light of the moon, that splayed across the room. But yet even that made it seem scarier, something out of a horror movie.

Spencer thinks he might melt by how sweet you sound, you wanted him to stay and the thought of you needing him makes him feel all floaty inside.

“Okay, yeah I’ll stay,” he says, smiling softly as he watches your face light up with excitement. He wasn’t too much of a fan of the dark either, the mystery of what might linger within the shadows always seemed much too daunting. Something he couldn’t shake even as he got older.

You clasp your hands together with a smile, “Oh!- I have something actually” his eyebrows furrow with slight confusion as he watches you disappear into your bedroom, but not before your turn around, “I’ll be one second” you inform him, he responds with a quiet, ‘okay?’ Still confused by what’s going on in that wonderful mind of yours.

He sets his work back down on your kitchen table, deciding that it’ll just have to wait until tomorrow. You soon return with a globe-shaped night light in hand, “Spencer Reid, be prepared to be amazed” you smile, and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little excited watching you click the batteries into the light.

You set it down on the coffee table before pressing the small button, a hopeful gleam in your eyes, silently praying that it will still work. And it does, the light shines in different colours projecting stars and moons onto the walls and ceiling. Spencer looks around the room, turning around as he does, admiring the way the room is suddenly lit up with warm colours.

“There was a study that found red to be the best colour to fall asleep to as it increases the production of melatonin,” he says, eyes still focused on the stars and moons that litter across the room in an orangey hue. He looks over to you and he goes to ramble off about night lights and their pros and cons but he finds himself completely taken back.

Spencer can practically feel the words leave his mind, and all his thoughts are replaced with you, how pretty you look underneath the warm light. He notices how your soft skin glows and the way your eyes seem to glisten, he doesn’t think there’s anyone in the world who compares to your beauty, in fact, he knows there isn’t. You’re so radiant, and he hopes that the smile your wearing is because of him.

You go bashful once you realise what’s happening, he’s looking at you as if you were a piece of art, sculpted by the gods. And he has those love-filled eyes, the same look he had when he finally asked you out on a date.

“You- you’re beautiful,” he tells you as if it was an undeniable fact, his voice so quiet that you almost miss it. Your smile breaks wider with his gentle words.

You can’t help but giggle, you felt so giddy inside. A feeling you haven’t felt in such a long time and it warms you. “Thank you Spence” you smile.

He feels almost prideful at your reaction, a feeling that settles in his chest blooming through to his heart and it takes his breath away, although you always have that effect on him no matter what you do.

There’s a beat of silence. “So, what about a game of Uno?” You suggest sitting down on the carpet as you reach for the box, patting the floor as an invitation for him to sit, “Loser pays for dinner” You wiggle your eyebrows and he chuckles joining you on the floor.

There is no winning when it comes to Spencer and board games, especially when it’s Uno. In all honesty, you regret going through the rules so intently with him. It’s impossible to win for a multitude of reasons. One because he’s so incredibly smart, and two because he’s a profiler, he can tell when you’re bluffing from a mile away.

So you’ve resorted to hiding cards underneath your thigh, and it worked for a solid minute, then he gives you a look as if to say ‘I know what you’re doing’ and the chuckle that unceremoniously leaves you doesn’t exactly help defend you.

“You’re totally cheating!” He claims, noticing how you’re three cards less than before. You gasp, a hand against your chest as you look at him with shock.

“Cheating? I wouldn’t” you exaggerate your offence, leaning forward to try and take a peak at his remaining cards, but he’s fast to hold them against his chest.

You take the cards from his hands, dodging his hands as he tries to grab them from you. “I would’ve won anyway, and you know it, that’s why hid those cards under your thigh- you know you probably would’ve won if you played your cards correctly, but you’re-” he blabs on, not even noticing how close you are to him. It’s not until your lips are against his that he completely falls silent, taken back by the sudden closeness.

You shock yourself a little too, it was almost as if you had no control it just happened. You push away from him, consumed by a sudden surge of panic.

“I’m so sorry Spencer- I” he grabs your hands before you lose yourself to your own worry, and beneath the dim lights you can see the slightest red dust against his cheeks.

“No!- it’s okay, I- I erm, I liked it actually” he tells you with an almost hopeful smile that you’ll do it again.

You smile back at him and this time you decide to simply ask, “Can I kiss you again? Properly this time” You study his face for any signs of discomfort, and there is none. He nods whispering a bashful, ‘Of course, you can'

And without missing a beat his hands rest on either side of your face and he meets you halfway, his supple lips against yours, a movement that seems to come so naturally to the pair of you. It’s sweet and gentle, and there’s the slightest taste of peppermint and something else, him.

Spencer thinks his heart might just jump out of his chest it’s beating so hard and he swears you hear it too or worse his thoughts. He can’t believe that this is happening, with you.

You tilt your head to urge him closer, your tongue against his and he loses himself. His hold changes as if he’s scared to let you go, that you might not be real, that all of this is just pretend. He kisses you with urgency as if you might just disappear.

You pull back to rest your forehead against his, “Spencer, I’m not going anywhere- you can slow down” you tell him, your tone so gentle as you take his hands guiding them away from your face to rest on your lap.

He nods against you, “I'm sorry- it just, feels too good to be true I guess” he admits, noticing the way you squeeze his hand, your thumb grazing against the curves of his knuckles.

“You don’t have to apologise- just know I’m not going anywhere, I’m staying right here with you” you whisper, brushing his hair behind his ear as you press a kiss to the tip of his nose, then another to his cheek then to the corner of his mouth and so on.

You pepper kisses against his face until he’s laughing, trying to push you away and the sound makes your heart clench with love, it’s something you’ll never grow tired of hearing.

“You're still paying for dinner by the way,” he says lips grazing against yours. And just when you’re about to kiss him, in an attempt to persuade him otherwise, the lights turn on and it’s then you can really see him, in much better lighting. Rosy cheeks and glossy love-sick eyes, and you think you fall for him ten times harder.

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ugh the lego spencer fic got me giggling like a little middle schooler with a crush. i need more please 😭😭😭

Total geek

{After Spencer has a tough week you surprise him with the Millennium falcon lego set and he geeks out}

Ack! He’s just the cutest <3 Hope you enjoy lovely!! 💕

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Spencer’s job was nothing short of stressful, every aspect of it was just so taxing. Sure sometimes it could be very rewarding, helping people, bringing justice and whatnot. But for the past week something seemed to sit heavy on his chest, a feeling he couldn’t quite shake.

You could tell that it was bothering him more than usual from the obvious crease that haunts the space between his brows, or how he would stay up late into the night studying cases. He became distant, and it hurt to see how much it was troubling him.

Spencer returned home early tonight, on the order of Hotch. He’d made a silly mistake today, which caused him to mess up on the geographical profile of the unsub. It was eating him alive because Spencer Reid doesn’t make mistakes. He couldn’t get his head around it, why and how had he messed up so bad?

He huffs dropping his brown shoulder bag on the floor after slamming the door shut. A flurry of emotions bubbled around in his chest and he wasn’t quite sure if it was the embarrassment or the frustration that was making him want to cry, perhaps it was both.

He walks further into the apartment, his fingers raking through his wind-tussled hair. “Hey sweetie, you’re home early,” you say, walking over to where he was sitting at the breakfast bar.

He clears his throat, trying to ignore the stinging sensation that’s prominent in the back of his throat. “Yeah, Hotch sent me home,” he tells you, wincing slightly at the memory, and you don’t miss the way his voice quivers with emotion.

You inch closer to him until you're standing in between his thighs and he smiles at the closeness. Leaning into your touch as you tuck his hair behind his ears. His heart swells with love, he hasn’t been this close to you in a while.

“I’m sure it came from a place of caring,” you tell him, sighing as his eyes fill with tears. He rests his head against your chest with a shaky sigh. Your hands soothe against his back.

You were right, even if it didn’t feel like it, you were right. Hotch cared, of course, he did, but that didn’t stop the embarrassment that still pinches at his heart. The team more often than not relied on Spencer and his ‘wonderfully scary brain’ as they put it, so for him to mess up was a big deal, he felt like he’d failed them.

He sniffles slightly, “I made a mistake on the geographical profile, no one got hurt, but I just-” he winces at how small his voice was, “It was embarrassing” he admits, nuzzling his nose further into your shoulder as if he was trying to hide away from the whole situation.

He shouldn’t be so hard on himself, he’s had a horrible week so, in reality, it was only a matter of time before he made a mistake, he was only human after all.

“Hey, look at me” you whisper, your hands cupping either side of his face as looks up at you with a strained smile, “You’ve had an awful week, it’s okay Spence” you reassure him and you can tell by the way he lets out a little ‘mhm’ that he doesn’t believe you.

“You’re only human sweetheart, you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself,” you tell him, and he sighs once again resting his head back against your shoulder.

You smile, excitement tingling through your chest as you think back to yesterday when you brought him another Lego set to add to his growing collection, the Millennium Falcon. You wanted to brighten up his week, so what better way than to buy him a gift?

“Okay, no more work talk” you declare, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he looks up at you with a thankful smile, “I’ve got you something, stay here” his expression changes to a more curious look as his eyebrows slightly knit together.

He doesn’t have time to question you before you’re making your way to the bedroom, reappearing with a huge box in your arms, poorly wrapped in old Christmas wrapping paper. His mouth opens slightly, what on earth have you brought?

He walks into the living room, sitting down next to you on the sofa, the mystery gift separating the two of you. “Okay open it!” You smile, and he’s at a complete loss for words as he starts ripping the paper.

You can’t help but giggle at the way his eyes light up, and the sight warms your heart. He lets out a little gasp, “Baby, you- you didn’t have to” he says, his heart hammering against his ribcage as he scrunches up the remaining wrapping paper into a ball, eyes fixed on the Lego set.

“I wanted to” you whisper, watching the way his eyes brim with tears.

“This- this thing is huge, where are we even going to put it?” He asks, looking around the apartment as he tries to figure something out. You grab his hand bringing his attention back to you.

“We’ll figure something out” you promise as he nods whispering a small ‘Yeah’

He places the box carefully on the floor before wrapping his arms around you, bringing you closer to him in a sweet hug. He presses a kiss to your cheek, “Thank you so much” he smiles, his chest bursting with happiness.

“Of course, anything to see you smile” you wink, with a teasing smile as he shakes his head with a laugh.

He sits down on the floor, patting the space beside him for you to sit next to him, and you gladly do so, as he opens the box with an excited smile.

“You know the Millennium Falcon was actually built in several different sizes,” he says, looking over at you with a smile, he watches as your eyebrows lift slightly with surprise as you turn to him.

“Really?” You ask, watching as he nods enthusiastically, pulling out the instruction manual.

“Yeah, the complete models of the Falcon ranged from very small, small enough to fit in the palm of your hand-” he pauses, a warmth blooming in his chest when he realises you’re still listening, waiting for him to carry on, “To- to over four feet and an almost full-size replica of the exterior of the ship, that was made for the empire strikes back, is measured almost sixty feet long,” he says, sorting all the Lego blocks into their correct spaces.

He continues to ramble off facts about the spaceship as you listen intently before a comfortable silence falls on the pair of you, soft music from the radio playing in the background as you both continue to build the Lego set. The minutes soon turn into hours.

“This is going to take weeks” he mumbles, his elbow resting against his knee as his chin sits in the palm of his hand.

You look over at the clock, dinner time. “Yep,” you say popping the ‘p’. He watches as you stretch your arms upwards, letting out a little groan. “I’m gonna order dinner, do you want Thai?” You ask as he nods, continuing to snap the Lego pieces together.

“Yes please, I’ll get the usual” he says as you nod. You press a kiss to the corner of his mouth before handing him his glasses that were sitting on the coffee table, noticing the way he was starting to rub at his eyes, he whispers a small ‘thanks’ as you stand up to grab your phone.

“Don’t lose any pieces this time!” You shout, giggling at the way he replies with a sarcastic laugh and a ‘Yeah yeah’

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Ouch!

{Spider-Man!Spencer comes home late with a gift and an apology}

I love this au so much it’s insane. I really hope you enjoy!! 💕

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2:23 am. The clock reads in bright red colours and you swear it’s taunting you, mocking you almost as you wait and wait for Spencer to return home. Angry felt like an understatement, you were beyond angry at this point and you blame him for making you sick with worry.

Spencer would normally send you a text at the very least, just to let you know he was coming home, but tonight, nothing, just complete radio silence. And now you were completely consumed with panic, a feeling that left a bitter taste in your mouth.

And that’s why you felt like throwing a pillow and a blanket at him as he clumsily climbs through your window, knocking his books off the shelves as he does, to tell him he’ll be sleeping on the sofa for the rest of the month.

But then he pulls off his mask, trying to catch his breath, his hair all messy and he gives you the biggest sweetest smile ever, eyes creasing with the action. He knows he’s messed up, big time.

“Baby- I’m sorry, I just-” he watches as you scoff before walking off into the bedroom, his smile drops and his eyebrows knit together with confusion, “Hey! Where are you going?” He asks, only to be met with the bedroom door in his face.

“Well now that I know you’re not dead, I’m going to sleep,” you tell him, and he winces slightly at the anger in your tone.

He didn’t mean to return so late, it was partly Derek's fault, he was the one who dumped all that paperwork on his desk, which made him late to his ‘late night parkour sessions’ as you so kindly called it.

Spencer rests his head against the wooden door, sighing softly, “I’m really sorry, can I come in-- please?” He asks, his voice so gentle that it almost makes you feel bad, “I really missed you today”, almost.

You contemplate packing a bag and calling Penelope, but then you would have to come up with a believable excuse because you couldn’t exactly tell her that Spencer, the same Spencer she’s been working with for years, is Spider-man.

He starts tapping the door to some rhythm in his head, “No, I don’t want to look at you right now” you tell him, hoping that he would just give in but that wasn’t exactly in Spencer’s nature.

Your words pain him more than you know, it hurts to hear but he couldn’t exactly blame you either, he knew you would worry.

He rummages through his brown shoulder bag looking for the necklace he and Derek brought. You wanted it for your birthday but it was sold out everywhere, then JJ had seen it on her way to work and immediately called Spencer, who was going to swing over to the jewellery shop, literally, but was soon stopped by Derek who said he’d go with him, something about Penelope having a rough week and wanting to treat her.

He holds the small purple box gently, thumb grazing over the velvet, sighing at the entire situation.

Then the door opens and a hopeful feeling blooms through his chest, “I’m going to get some water” and just like that it withers away.

He follows you out into the kitchen, his brown eyes full of guilt. He just wants to hold you again. “Sweetness, I was going to text you I swear- but then my phone” he admits holding up two pieces of his flip phone, snapped in half.

He’s about to go on a rant, explaining to you how it completely wasn’t his fault, how these guys were trying to rob this old woman on his way home, and Spencer being Spencer, plus the whole Spider-man thing, couldn’t just ignore it.

But you don’t let him, you guess you were just overcome with relief that he was alright, not bleeding out in some random alleyway, it kinda just hit you, washing over your tired body with haste as you threw your arms around his neck, bringing him close to you.

That same relief bleeds onto him, and with a heavy sigh as he rests his head in the crook of your neck. His arms encircling around you as he holds you close to him. He doesn’t want to let you go.

“I can’t keep paying for new phones” you whisper, trying to hold back the cries that wedge in the back of your throat with a giggle, and he chuckles softly shaking his head.

“You don’t have to, I’ll figure it out,” he says, pulling back slightly as he peppers gentle kisses all over your face, and his heart skips a beat at your soft laughter, the lovely sound only urges him to continue.

You’re hands cup either side of his cheeks as you look at him, studying his pretty face, “You really scared me tonight Spencer” you tell him, and he gives you an understanding look as he takes your hands in his, his thumb smoothing over the bumps of your knuckles.

“I know- I’m sorry, really-” you watch with slight confusion as he pulls out a small purple box from his pocket, “It won’t happen again, I promise” he whispers handing you the gift, he smiles watching with excitement as you open the box.

His heart stutters in his chest as he watches your eyes light up, glistening with joy as you look up at him, you go and say something but all that comes out is small gasps, and it makes the butterflies in his stomach all too prominent.

“I know this won’t make up for everything, and- and I’m not trying to buy your forgiveness, that’s not what I’m trying to do- I just want you to be-” and before you completely lose him to his panicked rambling, you push your hand against the back of his neck bringing him down as you kiss him, leaving him breathless.

He lets out a nervous chuckle, “S-so you like it?” He asks quietly, his lips against yours.

“I love it, thank you, baby,” you tell him, and he helps you put the necklace on, his gentle fingers grazing against your soft skin before you pull on his hand leading him into your bedroom with hushed giggles, your hearts full of love.

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-Spencer Reid x reader

{Spencer is much too easy to tease}

Short and fluffy!! Hope you enjoy as always💕

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“Were you sent home?” Is the first question you ask Spencer as he walks through the door much earlier than expected. Normally he’d work for hours upon hours, sometimes even days, but today he returned home only an hour after leaving. Not that you were complaining.

He nods, rolling his shoulders as he walks over to where you’re sitting on the sofa, your legs crisscrossed with a colouring book on your lap.

“Yeah, we finished up earlier than expected,” he said, watching as you put the book along with your felt tips on the coffee table. Spencer smiles as you shuffle closer to him on the couch.

You push back the hair that frames his face, tucking it behind his ear before pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. He turns to you, wanting a proper kiss but you’re quick to stop him, hands against his shoulders with a teasing smile.

You watch as his eyebrows furrow slightly, “So, good day then?” You wonder, enjoying the slightest confusion that paints his face.

“Yeah, good day,” he says, as he leans into you again, but you pull away dodging his advances, keeping him at arm's length.

He looks almost offended as you continue with your silly antics. “Ooo- are those new frames?” You ask, taking his glasses off and admiring them. He shakes his head as he takes them from your hands before placing them next to your pencil case on the table.

You watch as he bites his bottom lip, trying to figure out why the hell you’re evading him. “What? no- you know they’re not new sweetheart.” He says almost cautiously, leaning back into you and just before his lips meet yours you turn your head, and he kisses your cheek before pulling back with a worried look that contorts his face, and you start to feel a little guilty.

He's about to go on a panicked tangent asking if he's done anything wrong, but then he sees it in your eyes, as you bite back the giggle that bubbles in the back of your throat, “Oh, you’re doing it on purpose aren’t you?” He asks, watching as you bite your lip.

His eyebrows pull together with amusement as he watches you purse your lips trying so hard to stop the uncontrollable smile. "Doing what on purpose?" you ask, and he chuckles although it comes out more like a scoff.

His hand cups your jaw, turning your head to face him as he finally presses a sloppy kiss to your lips causing you to whine in disgust. You try to push away but he doesn’t let you, instead, he chuckles at the way your face scrunches up.

“Not happening Spencer,” you tell him trying to be as stern as possible, but to no avail, you can’t help but laugh when he pushes you to lay down against the couch as he sits between your legs.

He frowns at the use of his name. It’s odd hearing his first name leave your lips, it was always ‘Spence’ or some variation of a nickname, and he decides at that moment that he hates it. He smirks as his cold hands slip underneath the shirt you’re wearing, splaying across your stomach and he chuckles as you gasp trying to push him away.

You try a good five times to stop his cold wandering hands from traversing across your warm body until you finally connect the dots, he’s not paying you any mind as you call him by his first name.

“Oh- you’re so annoying” you groan trying to wiggle out from underneath him, but it’s useless, as he lays his body weight on top of you, his head resting in the crook of your neck.

You give in deciding it was pointless to fight Spencer when he gets like this. “Mhm, and you love it, don’t you?” He smirks against your skin, dropping a kiss to your shoulder then another to your jaw, until he’s peppering your face with warm kisses.

“Yes I do, I love you so much” you giggle, his lips against yours as he gives you little pecks that soon turn into a warm kiss, your hands playing with his hair.

“I love you too” he whispers, and you let him lay on top of you, a mess of limbs on the sofa as he smothers you with kisses, and you don’t think you’ll ever grow tired of this side of Spencer.

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‘I love you’

{Spencer can’t sleep without saying I love you, no matter how mad you are with each other}

Hope you enjoy as always my lovelies! 💕

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You both shouldn’t have gotten so mad over such a trivial thing, though you suppose it’s been building up for a while now, the lack of communication, the missed dates and whatnot. In all honesty, you couldn’t even remember why you were initially mad at him and now that you’re laying in bed with a tear-stained pillow beneath you, it seems all so pointless.

Arguments are bound to happen in relationships. Two people aren’t always going to see eye to eye, but knowing that doesn’t make it any easier. A part of you is expecting him to apologise and the other half of you is trying to come up with an apology yourself, but nothing happens. Spencer stays in the living room to give you some space and you’re left to simmer with your thoughts.

He was late again tonight, it seemed like your schedules did nothing but clash for weeks and the distance was slowly eating at you until you finally snapped. You’d also blame your own work stress for the anger that pinches at your skin, the same anger that only fuelled tonight’s argument.

Spencer hates it, hates the silence that comes afterwards, albeit arguments between you two were few and far between it still had the same effect on him, the odd sinking feeling that hits his stomach.

You both should just apologise and talk about it like adults, but yet you’re both stubborn in your own rights, and so neither of you do. Instead, you fall asleep alone with a heavy heart, and Spencer creeps into the room hours after with an ache in his chest.

He notices the dampness on your pillow from your tears and it only makes that dull ache in his chest hurt all the more, he gently pushes your hair from your face, tucking it behind your ear as he sighs at the tear stains that paint your face, even in sleep you look sad.

You wake up as he climbs into bed, and you make no effort to let him know, in fact, you’re pretty sure he knows you’re awake when he starts drawing patterns on your back with his finger.

You frown softly as you try to figure out what he’s doing. You're about to turn around and complain, and then you feel it. He gently traces the words ‘I love you’ into your skin, fingers grazing along your spine. You feel him shuffle closer to you, and his lips press gently onto your shoulder, then the soft words, “I’m sorry” leave his lips, and you can feel the guilt drown you.

You turn around, noticing how the tears in his eyes glisten under the warm light of the lamp and you don’t think twice before reaching out and wiping them away, he sighs at your touch.

“You don’t have to apologise, I blew things way out of proportion” you admit. Spencer shakes his head, noticing how you don’t make eye contact with him, and so he holds your hand, his thumb smoothing over your knuckles.

“You had every right to be mad, and we both blew things way out of proportion” he reasons, not liking the sigh that leaves your lips as if you didn’t believe his words. His eyebrows furrow slightly watching the tears collect in your eyes.

The root of your sudden argument was really because were both so tired and missed each other’s touch, which in retrospect should’ve had the opposite effect of what happened tonight, but emotions are a tricky thing,

So that’s why you don’t pull away when Spencer opens his arms out to you, pulling the blanket over the pair of you as you settle against him. “I’m sorry,” you say, his chin resting gently on top of your head as his hand soothes your back.

He presses a kiss to your hairline as you mumble, “And, I love you too” He smiles when your hands dip underneath his shirt, a desperate need of his warmth, you just needed to feel him.

“I love you more” he smiles, his arms squeezing you just a little tighter against him, tight enough to make you giggle, a sound Spencer swears could cure all of his ills.

There's a silence that drapes over the pair of you, and it's not like before it's different Spencer thinks, much more comfortable as he listens to your breathing.

You look up at him, and he catches onto the exhaustion that stains your face, before you can say anything he's already speaking, "You're tired. Get some sleep and we'll talk tomorrow, over breakfast, yeah?" he smiles leaning down to press one last gentle kiss to your forehead, and you would be lying if you said the idea of breakfast with Spencer didn't make you feel a little giddy.

So you whisper a quiet 'Okay' before drifting off in his arms. and you both make a silent promise to talk about it tomorrow, like adults.

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Drunk, but oh so in love.

{A drunk Spencer Reid is very affectionate, not that you're complaining.}

I love him sm it’s crazy, enjoy my lovelies!! 💕💕

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Quiet summer nights like this are always nice when the air isn’t too stuffy and the moon is high, accompanied by a nice breeze. You’re sitting on your sofa with a new colouring book on your lap as you colour away, partly paying attention to the random ocean documentary that was playing on the tv.

You enjoyed the serenity, although you were starting to miss Spencer since he had been stolen away from you by Derek Morgan, claiming that he and Spencer deserved a ‘boys' night’ after having a great week, he didn’t seem all that thrilled at the idea but Derek had a way of talking that made it impossible to say no.

You looked over to your phone, it was nearing midnight and just as you were about to turn away it rang, and you smiled when Spencer’s name showed up, vibrating a few times before you pressed down on the green button holding the device to your ear.

“Hey-” and before you could even get a whole sentence out you heard rustling from the other side of the line, along with a pair of voices arguing. Spencer and Derek.

“Kid- wait-”

“No give it to me, I wanna say hi-”

“You can’t- just-”

“Give me my phone Morgan-”

You heard Derek groan and then more shuffling. You couldn’t help but giggle at the thought of the pair fighting for the phone.

“Hey sweetheart- sorry ‘bout that, Derek stole my phone, can you believe that?” You smile at the genuine disbelief in Spencer’s tone, and you can hear Derek say something about how he ‘didn’t steal it’ and a very long sigh.

“Anyway, I’m coming home now. I missed you, missed you a lot and I love you… so much” he says, and you practically hear the exhaustion that laces through his tone.

“I missed you too baby” you smile as you start to put away your colouring book, deciding you should also probably get him a change of clothes ready for when he returns.

“Missed you more, and your voice- god I can’t wait to come home I want- hey!” And before Spencer could inevitably embarrass himself, and you, Derek takes the phone from his hand with a frustrated huff holding him back with his arm as he talks to you.

“Your man had one too many, and he’s been asking for you nonstop for the past hour,” he tells you and the thought has your chest blooming with love, but then it daunts on you, a drunk Spencer who rambles about you without a care who’s listening, yeah you think you’ll worry about that a different day.

“Wonderful, you’ll call Hotch? because he’s not going to work tomorrow. ” You sigh, trying to keep a stern tone and Derek agrees with a chuckle and a ‘Yes ma’am' whilst still trying to keep Spencer at an arm's length as he fights for the phone and you can hear him in the background.

“Derek, Derek, Derek- tell her I love her. I love you, sweetheart!” You giggle as you say your goodbyes to a very exhausted-sounding Derek Morgan before hanging up the phone with a sigh, you were in for a very long night.

Which in all honesty was such an understatement as you try to help Spencer walk up a flight of stairs after he downright refused to take the elevator, something about a ‘terrifying experience’ that then had him drunkenly rambling off horrifying elevator accidents.

He leans all his weight onto your side as he tries to kiss you. Your arm wraps securely around him and at this point, you’re practically dragging him up the stairs and you start to deeply regret telling Derek you would be fine taking him back up to the apartment by yourself.

Eventually, by some miracle, you got him into the apartment, guiding him to take a seat at the table as you pour him some water. You plop a few ice cubes into the glass before placing the cool beverage on the table and you notice the way his eyes don’t leave you, he looks almost star-struck.

“Are you going to drink the water hmm?” You ask inching the glass closer to him, his eyes seem to glisten with admiration.

“You’re really pretty” he whispers as if it was a secret meant for only you to hear and you can’t help but giggle. You watch as his eyebrows knit together with an almost offended expression, “No, I’m being serious. It’s true you’re beautiful” and his words only make you chuckle all the more.

“Come on, drink up then we’ll go to bed,” you tell him, pushing the hair that frames his face and tucking it behind his ear. He smiles up at you as you press a gentle kiss to his forehead, hand resting on his cheek before you go and find him something more comfortable to wear.

Spencer practically downs the entire glass before clumsily jogging into the bedroom, tripping over air as he enters the dimly lit room with a small- ‘Crap!’

You gasp as you watch him fall forward and, luckily, onto the bed, “Sorry” he chuckles, sitting up as you walk over to him, “I just missed you” he suddenly stands up, his hands cupping either side of your jaw as he starts to pepper gentle kisses all over your face.

You try to push yourself away, telling him that you both should sleep as it’s nearing two in the morning but all attempts are fruitless.

“I love you so much” he smiles as his eyes study your face, “So so so much”

“I love you too Spence, now sit down before you hurt yourself,” you say and he presses one last final kiss to the tip of your nose, and with that, he finally sits back down on the bed as he starts to unbutton his shirt.

You turn to go and grab his PJs and by the time you face him his shirt is stuck halfway off his head and he lets out a frustrated groan as he tries to tug the shirt off with half the buttons still done up.

“Oh my- baby, stop. stop” you tell him moving his hands away as you start to undo the buttons and once he’s finally released from the confines of his uncomfortable button-up, you hand him an old Star Trek shirt and he happily pulls it over his head, his hair all tussled from the action.

“Thank you honey” he smiles as his hands settle against your hips, tugging you closer to him, his head resting against your stomach, “You know Derek was wrong,” he tells you matter-of-factly.

Your fingers brush through his hair, “About what hmm?” You ask, genuinely curious as to where this was going.

He looks up at you with an almost proud smirk, “I’ve got game” he says, pride bursting through his chest and he holds you a little closer.

You chuckle, “Well, I mean you wooed me so” you trail off, as he nods against you and you can tell by the look on his face that the exhaustion is creeping up on him.

“Yeah, and you’re- you’re just extraordinary, so I must be doing something right,” he says, and you would be lying if you said his words didn’t make you feel a little giddy.

You smile down at him before leaning to press a kiss to his hairline, “Put on these and I’ll go get you some more water, then we’ll go sleep, yeah?” you whisper handing him a pair of joggers because god knows the apparent gets unbelievably cold at night. And he nods watching with love-sick eyes as you walk out of the bedroom.

And sleep he does, but not before telling you he loves you about one hundred times, before he curls up against you with his leg thrown over yours, his hand splayed across your soft belly as he snores against your shoulder. And you prepare yourself to spend the day looking after a very hungover Spencer Reid, not that you’re complaining of course, there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for him.

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