Don't follow the advice here unless you're looking for creative ways to die.
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Life Tip #39
Life Tip #39
never have to worry about figuring out a costume for Halloween again, by dressing in a ghost costume every day of the year, so on Halloween, you can become the greatest costume ever: you!
unless you already are a ghost, in that case, sorry boo
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More Posts from Lifetipsy
Life Tip #31
does your teacher want you to turn in notecards on top of everything else you have to do? get back at them by fucking bLINDING THEM WITH THE BRIGHTEST NEON SHIT YOU GOT! YOU WANNA SEE MY DEFINITION OF AGRIBUSINESS? IT’S ON A TRAFFIC CONE, HOPE YOU ENJOY HELL
Life Tip #35
struggling to unscramble all your problems and get yourself sorted out? well fear no more, because it’s the 21st century and there are multiple websites where you can enter in your problems and it’ll rearrange them for you! ex. procrastinate becomes aristocrate so all i have to do to solve that problem is find a rich person who really likes boxes. i’m a fucking genius :))
Life Tip #45
always teased for being short? start calling tall people names like “squirt” and “short-stack” ! not only will it catch them off guard, they’ll probably try to defend themselves only to be shot down again! let them feel the revenge of the under 5′2s !!
“wait, i’m above average, you can’t call me that”
“whatever you say, pipsqueak”
Life Tip #37
always stock up on soap you can store in your bags so that way, if somebody particularly repulsive stands to close to you or tries to talk to you, you can just dump it on them!
pros: they now smell nice, have to find water to wash it off and get away from you, it’s not inconveniencing enough to be charged with assault, and it’s relatively cheap.
cons: ??
Life Tip #43
with halloween growing closer and closer, it’s time to pull out the list of amazing fun-filled family-friendly classic halloween movies! choose from titles such as:
1. the nightmare before christmas - the heartwarming story of a guy who stepped out of his comfort zone and ruined everything! truly inspiring!
2. mickey mouse’s house of villains - classic disney villains learn that if at first you don’t succeed, try again! and fail again!
3. it’s the great pumpkin, charlie brown - heartbreaking! a kid reserves a seat for a giant pumpkin and he fails to show up. you hate to see this kind of thing.
4. hocus pocus - trying to impress your crush goes terribly wrong. a big fucking mood.