"I Am A Mosaic Of Everyone L've Ever Loved, Even For A Heart Beat."

"I am a mosaic of everyone l've ever loved, even for a heart beat."

Living Mosaics - by Hannah Hassler

He has everything..

He has peace..

He has freedom..

He has loyal people..

He's loved..

But..

He wanted more..

In the circle of thriving for power and greed, he lost everything he once had..

From :

"what's a life without power?"

To:

"what's a life with power to control one's body when their mind and heart despises you the most?"

He realised the cost of his greed..

Everything he paid with, for the power that's so useless..

He realised he's the most powerless he's ever been with all the power he ever dreamt of..

"Each person deserves a day away in which no problems are confronted and no solutions are searched for."

-Maya Angelou

I don't feel particularly proud of myself. But when I walk alone in the woods or lie in the meadows, all is well.

- Franz Kafka

The Last Summer Dairies..

Last summer was slow, painfully slow, with nothing to do and no one to talk to, bored, silent, lonely.. and so my mind has all the time of the world to think - over think - everything and anything cause why not, I used to write stuff that stings my mind randomly.. I spilled my thoughts and the flow of words into the papers soaking them in the ink of my favourite black pen.. now I wanted to put that whole collection here one by one reminiscing every memory - or thought - again!!

Welcome to my Last Summer Diaries..

capturing the moments (intro?)

Intro pt2

Someone's intro~

To my someone

To my someone 2

coming soon..

Tags : #the last summer dairies

Introvert-friendly?

I mean I'm a socially awkward animal and I need care?! So.. be friendly (introvert-friendly!)

So I want to be in a community of any topic but like the "introvert-friendly" community (or groups or channel or whatever irdk!). No I don't mean like a community of introverts! I just want an introvert-friendly community if it makes sense..

Like an 'introvert' community is a community with introverts but an 'introvert-friendly' community (as I call it ..) is a community that is introvert-friendly.. lol.. ok so what I really mean is a community that's not too small to be less informative/useful but not too big to give anxiety.. I mean I really wanna join in groups that are about my favourite artists or idols or anything I like basically but then seeing the vast numbers of human beings that are formed into such a community makes me anxious.. I mean as much as I would love to be updated with my fav artist I don't want notifications flooding my phone and if the mute or off the notifications still when I open that certain app I would see tons of 'to-be read' texts which are the triggers points, the fear of missing out if I just scroll down and the fear of feeling left out is one thing but the fear to even see that many texts is terrifying (personally!). Which is why I wanna be in communities that are introvert-friendly. Cause I can just join in some communities where we only get updates (and anyone or I cannot text) to be updated but that'd mean no communication at all which is sometimes boring and most of the times discouraging if the reason I wanna join is to make friends or to be more communicative.

I don't know if I even make sense at all with this but this is something I've been feeling lately. I wanna know new people but larger groups make me anxious, more people and more communication makes me anxious, and still I want 'new' people in life T_T like I can go out and make friends but that'd make me anxious too, I mean my whole point is I'm an introvert so you can't expect me to do things in the casual and most usual way, cause what's causal for you is already a trigger point or an terrifying chore for me. Or maybe just maybe meeting new people in life than online is not only much more terrifying but also a lot boring .. ryt ?