Drive-by Psychoanalysis

Drive-by psychoanalysis

A matronly, sweet psych professor

Was stopped by a burly aggressor.

Said she "These displays

Are Oedipal plays

For love, mother (fucking) obsessor." 

The story of Sleipnir's first cousin

A man they call Buckaroo Billy

Found wild mares perked up his willy.

But Ma wished he'd date

A respectable mate,

So he settled down with a nice filly.

Don't get me started on Coke and Mentos

I once had a friend, Barry Metlzer

Who always was guzzling seltzer.

His last words were a squelch

Then a sonic-boom belch

That blew him to bits helter-skelter.

Nothing puts me off of ice pops like wrinkly testicles

Old Frank, at the beach nearby Cambridge

Would show off his favorite appendage.

His Speedo's snug size 

Proves he's circumcised.

From people to fish, all took umbrage.

I definitely would have cuddled with this at night with the rest of my stuffed animals.

i'm about to ruin molecules for you

every time i look at a diagram of a molecule i can’t not see some underwear and a crotch and some legs than have been chopped off

ok here do you see it now?

BUT WAIT it gets worse when you get to more complex molecules like hydrocarbons

and by worse i mean disturbing

THIS ISN’T CHEMISTRY ANY MORE THIS IS SILENT HILL