Now I Don't Know If I'm A Slytherin Or Ravenclaw

Now I don't know if I'm a slytherin or ravenclaw

Great

Griffindor: I’d DIE for you

Slytherin: I’d KILL for you

Hufflepuff: I’d die WITH you

Ravenclaw:

Ravenclaw: guys, I’d just find a way where NO ONE dies...

Hogwarts houses as shit me and my besties have said over text

Slytherin:okay we seriously need a name for the group.

Gryffindor:okay listen-

Slytherin:?

Gryffindor: in my humble opinion-

Slytherin: oh look she said 'humble' like a nerdy lil bitch.

_________________

Ravenclaw,sending a video of how the curtains are moving in weird way: yo????

Slytherin:gurl-

Slytherin:what the- is that a head????

Slytherin: gurl is that yoUR GRANDPA??¿¿¿

Ravenclaw:💀

I'm sorry but why does everyone imagine that if the lords had escaped the village with miranda being dead,that..that karl would be a dirty mechanic???? Like????? All the brains and all the inventions that he once made??? Are GONE!!???okay like maybe he'd own a car company or some shit like maybe own the future in his hands because he would be that super genius that created robots??????????????????????

Ravenclaw: Why are u grinning like that???

Slytherin: Why can't I smile regularly for no reason at all??? Hufflepuff does that all the time-

Hufflepuff,trying her best to go down the moving stairs: WELL I DONT GRIN CAUSE GRYFFINDOR FELL DOWN THE MOVING STAIRS AND BROKE THREE BONES YOU SICK FUCK-

Mother Miranda: I love all my children equally.

Mother miranda: there's Evelyn,Alcina Dimitriscu,Karl heisenberg and-

Mother Miranda,looking at smudged ink on her hand: Donald bentenison..and

Mother Miranda,squints harder: Maroon 5

I climbed a tree when i was 7 to prove to an asshole that I could do it without falling,so if you tell me I can't drink sea scented shampoo,I will-