A.k Excerpts - Tumblr Posts

I thought I'd see ichor spill from your veins

but it's just red, hot blood

All this time you were human

yet you shamed my humanity

Excerpt

I think if I was less complacent I might have a bone to pick with the universe, with the way it shaped me. But ultimately it is because of the way I was shaped that I will instead blame myself for growing into this unfamiliar carcass.

I think people are assigned their roles before birth and it is futile to fight against it, especially for people with the same role as mine. Someone can only be great if others are awful and those like me are made to be awful. 

I’ve only ever looked at life as an outsider, a wanderer going from town to town, a recluse. I can only ever hope, only ever put all my efforts into being average and still fall somewhere below the par, somewhere in the slums, down in the sewers while the more deserving walk on the ground above me.

If they dig me up they’ll find something not quite human; they’ll find hollow bones and joints that sit differently and a missing voice box, a warped up thing to make others look more human. 

It’s my very nature to subdue myself—whatever “myself” is. It’s the hand I’ve been dealt with. It’s evident in how I don’t bother fighting this hand—some do, and they do succeed occasionally. 

It’s evident in how I’m writing this at 4am under a phone’s light when I could very well just go to another empty room, but I would never try to make space for myself. 

It’s evident in how I feel no resentment while writing this—just acceptance, perhaps sadness.

It’s evident in how I took up the pen. 

I do get opportunities to clamber out of the slums, and I pass them up only to realize ‘oh that was my chance’ when it’s already far too late. I reach a fork in the road, I take the wrong path and realize my mistake when there’s no way back. I don’t look others in the eye, I don’t speak when I need to, I swat every helpful hand away and I take every chance to sit by myself. I am also complacent in my destruction, but the journey downward is the only thing I can hope to control so why would I not take the reins? Lead this marred thing further into tumultuous silence. 

There was a pomegranate sliced in half for me. I get one seed every now and then to keep me going, to keep me sedated. I slip on my crutches and there’s that sweetness at my lips, red trailing down the skin stretched sinfully over my face.                                                                                                            --Amani.K               

Does anyone else ever abandon their projects to write something completely unrelated? Here's something that has been sitting in my imaginary shelf for so long it was starting to disturb my writing and beta reading projects.

Thanks for the tag @aschlindartroom! This was so fun to do <3

Tagging (no pressure): @whimsyqueen @perasperaadastrawriting @cheywritesx  @papisnickle @bookish-galaxy @worldstogetlostin  @aohendo @moonscribbler @fearofahumanplanet @bardic-tales @pluttskutt  

Rules: use this quote generator & list as many quotes as you like using characters from your WIPs, then tag as many people as quotes you listed.

(Lot's of quotes for "Usurped Thrones and Relentless Fates" because unfortunately, I do have a favourite child.)

Aidah : Why would you do that?  Zarah: Because I feel guilty.  Reem : Guilt is a trick emotion. It’s put there by your parents to stop you from doing things that feel good. 

Aidah : Sometimes I like to place my hands on someone’s cheeks, look into their eyes...  Aidah : ...And violently jerk their head until it snaps.  Zarah: ...That took an unexpected turn.  Reem : So did their neck.

Reem , to Zarah: If you see Aidah , give them this message *makes a neutral face*  Reem : They'll know what it means.  *later*  Zarah: oh, and Reem said to give you a message.  Zarah: *makes a neutral face*  Aidah : Oh no. The neutral face of displeasure.

Aidah : Hey, no, you stay out of this, this is between me and Reem !  Zarah: So Reem knows about this?  Aidah , walking away: No, this is between me and me!

Zarah: So what, now I’m just supposed to do everything that Reem does? What if they jump off a cliff?  Aidah : If Reem were to jump off a cliff, they would have done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry. So yes, if you see Reem jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.  Zarah: You jump off a cliff.  Aidah : Gladly, provided Reem did first

Aidah : Oh Reem , we have a visitor!  Reem : Don't tell me it's Zarah.  Aidah : It's Zarah

Zarah: How high are you?  Aidah : Mm, I don’t know how to say it in feet.  Reem : No, they’re asking what drugs are you on.  Aidah : Oh, antidepressants, why?

From "Last Phase of a Sun"

Asura : Hopefully Yumi has learned a lesson about respecting other people's feelings.  Yumi: Oh, shut up and die Asura

Yumi: When you've been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop thick skin.  Asura : Navy blue isn't your color.  Yumi: Navy blue brings out my eyes you prick! *Chases after Asura * 

Yumi: Wendy, we're hungry!  Marion: Wendy! What's for dinner?  Asura : We're hungry, Wendy!  Wendy, frying a bottle of ketchup over the stove: *screams* 

(From Cul-de-Sac)

(Yes, he is only referred to as “father” throughout the story)

Father: Everything’s fine, Hana.  Hana: Father, I know your relationship with the english language is strictly casual, but you- I- *deep inhale* ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU WHAT’S NOT FINE.