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A mini angst Krusie comic

This was originally going to be just random doodles but it turned into this comic

Susie hugging kris was not easy mostly cause it was my first time ever drawing someone hugging someone else without a base

(If you have any questions about my designs let me know, also should i color this?)

was it a missed opportunity or just the right timing for the main couple 🤔

Homecoming (M)

Pairing: NCT Johnny ♡ Female!Reader

Description: When a high school reunion drags you back from the bustling city to your hometown, you can’t help but feel inadequate compared your friends’ settled lives, who have thing you want most— kids. You may get your most desperate wish when your long-lost best friend sweeps into town, not quite the introverted nerd he was from 10 years ago.

Genre: high school reunion au smut | romance  WC: 16k Warnings: graphic smut (Dom! Johnny + Sub! Reader, dirty talk, !!!pregnancy kink!!!, unprotected sex, oral sex, rough sex, bulge kink, slight exhibitionism, footsie, slight cum eating, overstimulation), mentions of adultery

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“back in time 🤝 soulmates”, mix of genres was written so well for both the f.mc and m.mc pov-versions 👏🏼👏🏼

SEVEN LETTERS | Jaehyun

SEVEN LETTERS | THE STORY UNTOLD (SEQUEL)

SUMMARY. On a camping trip, you find a message in a bottle that’s been washed up the shore, only to find out that it’s a message from you in the future. Your message tells you three things:

You must make Jeong Jaehyun fall in love with you because,

He’s your soulmate and

Because of your future self’s mistake, he ended up falling in love with someone else.

GENRE. soulmate!au | childhood friends to lovers!au | slight fake dating!au | fluff | angst

important note: the text from the letters are in bold

WORD COUNT. 10.1k+ words (BIG oof)

author’s note. here she is 🥺 this didn’t take too long to write out, which is very surprising. it is extremely impossible for me to write a 10k fic over the course of two days. i think i’m just really ingested in soulmate!aus and it just triggers so much imagination and creativity. anyways, enough of my ramble, i hope you enjoy this fic as much as i enjoyed writing it! also, it’s unedited so if there are any mistakes, i’m apologizing in advance!

It would be an utter lie for you to say that Jeong Jaehyun didn’t have a tiny little spot reserved for him in your heart. It was like he packed your feelings for him in a suitcase and brought it along with him on the trip to your heart. But just like that tiny spot you have for him in your heart, your courage to tell him how you feel is just as tiny. Maybe a bit tinier.

But you think you’re okay with it. You’re fine with how you and Jaehyun are right now.

Endearing gazes. Lingering looks. Skipped heartbeats. Flushed cheeks. Unspoken words and thoughts—

“The water’s cold!”

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summer camp tensions 😏🔥❤️

I heard a rumor

summary: You hate that the new camp counselor you’re bunking with is Jeno, the “bad boy” that was rumored to have cheated on your best friend in high school. He doesn’t want to room with you either, believing the rumor that you started the rumor that fueled his (fake) cold, heartless reputation. But somehow, everything changes over the summer.

pairing: enemy!Jeno x fem!reader

(other roomies: renjun, donghyuck, jaemin)

genre: porn w/ plot, angst, eventual heavy fluff, slow burn

tropes: college, ex classmates, roommates, enemies to lovers

word count:  8.8k

a/n: another belated installment of my roommates song req event w/ “Vertigo” by Derik Fein; thank you to the anon who requested it!

warning: rough unprotected sex, oral (male and female), throat f&cking, use of “good girl” a lot, masturbation, drinking, tiny verbal sexual harassment, hard dom!Jeno, sub!reader

Month 1

“Why do you get the only real bed in the cabin?” you complain to Jeno as he hops on the new memory foam mattress.

It’s absolutely ridiculous that the newest counselor gets an actual bed while you and your friends, Renjun, Hyuck and Jaemin, have to share squeaky, decades-old bunk beds.

“The director told me I get this bed because I’m head counselor,” Jeno shrugs. Your whiny tone gives away your extreme frustration with the favoritism he’s already received his first day on the job. He smiles back to you, curious about how quickly he can get your blood to boil.

“Co-head. You’re co-head counselor. We share the title, okay?”

“Huh, that’s interesting, because the director gave me the keys to every door in the camp. Did you get a set of keys, y/n?” Jeno baits, eagerly awaiting your outburst. Your ears begin to burn as you spot the amused twinkle in his eyes.

It’s impossible to ignore how excruciatingly more handsome he has become since graduation, and even harder to suppress the fluttering in your body. Curse the universe for gracing him with good looks and perfect body proportions. Girls must throw themselves at his feet for how hot he is.

But you are no such girl.

Keep reading

I remember reading this last year as one of my first enha fics. Honestly, fell in love with the way it was written, that, and the transitions between the lifespans was clearly broken up, leaving little-to-no room for confusion 🥰👍🏼

[theres an alternative ending too found on the masterlist!]

BLUE BIRTHDAY － yang jungwon.

SYNOPSIS! you’ve always despised your birthday ever since your boyfriend, jungwon, passed away on that exact date. 5 years after jungwon’s death, you receive a strange package filled with photos seemingly taken by jungwon when he was still alive. after you find out that these photos can allow you to travel back in time to when the photo was taken, you realise that you might be able to reverse everything - including jungwon’s death.

PAIRING! non-idol! jungwon x fem! reader

GENRE! angst, fluff, kind of reincarnation au, inspired by the kdrama “blue birthday”.

WARNINGS! technically major character death, mentions of death, a car crash scene, mentions of blood, swearing, the past timeline takes place in 2020 / 2021, current timeline is set in 2026 / 2027. 

WORDCOUNT! 10.2k

AUTHOR’S NOTE! helloooo ^_^ this fic is Heavily inspired by the drama so there will be spoilers if you haven’t watched it (YERI SLAYED) !! this is the Longest fic i have ever written and. i am proud of myself for writing this much T_T plus papercuts CAN scar!! i have one on my finger lol . and happiest of birthdays to my beluvd wonie and i hope u all enjoy this fic <3 lmk ur thoughts on this one hehe 

I. PRESENT DAY, 2026.

“Happy birthday, (Name)!”

You hate your birthday. 

It should be the happiest day of the year - you’re a year older, and you’re celebrating it with friends. But all you remember when you think of your birthday is the sickening sound of a car screeching to a stop, and seeing a body, lying on the ground - crimson staining his clothes.

Yang Jungwon.

That was his name.

Your first love. Five years ago on your birthday, there was a terrible accident. You remember frantic screams, and you remember seeing Jungwon getting hit.

You two were heading back to his apartment to celebrate. He was so excited too - he had a cake prepared, decorations strewn across his apartment, and he even bought his dog Maeumi a party hat.

Maybe if you two headed out just a few minutes late - maybe if you lied, and said that you needed five extra minutes at the library then he would still be here, next to you. 

Maybe he would still be alive.

So no, it’s not a happy birthday.

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omgosh! There was an alternative ending! 😭😭 They’re literally like soulmates stuck in a bittersweet loop 😭

bluer birthday — yang jungwon.

synopsis. one last picture means one last chance to travel back in time to bring your dead boyfriend, yang jungwon back. but when you go back in time, you find yourself landing mere seconds before the crash that took your boyfriend’s life. with only a little time to spare, you find yourself needing to make a decision.

genre. angst (happy birthday won i’m sorry), alternate ending to blue birthday (please read that fic before this one or it won’t make sense), inspired by the tv show blue birthday

pairing. non idol! jungwon x fem! reader

word count. 2.4k

warnings. major character death, car crash, blood, ambulances, swearing

authors note. this is long overdue😅 i was supposed to post this like a week after i posted the original blue birthday fic, but… here i am now with the alternate ending! happy birthday jungwon 😅 and don’t worry i didn’t just post angst for his bday😭 there is a sequel to kiss and cry that is full of fluff if you’d like to read that too !! but in the meantime, enjoy the alternate ending to blue birthday ^_^

ONE. present day, 2026. 

You hold the last photo in your hands as Youngeun looks at you nervously. 

Your hands tremble a little as you look at the picture – you know that this is your last shot at bringing Jungwon back. You have tampered with the past, present and the future too much, and you know that there could be serious consequences. Regardless, you would do anything for Jungwon. 

“You only have one chance,” Youngeun tells you. 

You let out a shaky breath as you look at her. “Yeah. I do. This is my last shot.” 

“When you burn the picture, it should bring you back to when the photo was taken, right?” Youngeun asks, and you nod. At least, that’s what happened the last couple of times when you went back in time. You can only hope that the same thing happens this time. 

“Do you need any extra details?” Youngeun asks. 

“No,” you say, gazing at the photo. “It’s okay.” 

You remember every single second. How could you not, when you watched the person that you cared about the most die right in front of your very eyes. Every year on your birthday, you are reminded of the scene, and you want nothing but to erase it from your memory. 

“Good luck,” Youngeun says. “We’ll be waiting for you when you both are back.” 

“Thank you, Youngeun.” you smile at your friend. “I think I’m going to need it.”

“Don’t hurt yourself while you’re there,” she tells you. 

You nod, before you light the candle, taking one last look at the picture before holding it above the fire, letting the photo burn it away. 

TWO. the day of the accident, 2021.

You open your eyes walking across a street that looks all too familiar. 

You turn to look at who’s standing next to you, and it’s Jungwon. But something doesn’t seem right. The photo didn’t bring you back to when the photo was taken – you woke up in a completely different moment from the same day, and it’s only when you see the name of the street when you realise what’s going on.

Jungwon is mere seconds away from getting killed from that car. 

Your eyes widen in fear, shaking your head. “No, no, no.” you mumble, trying not to startle Jungwon. You look to your right, and you see the dreaded car plate that is engraved into your memory. 52 3018. 

You take a quick look at your watch, and it’s like time slows down when you read the time on your watch. 7:07, and there’s 30 seconds until the crash. The car is moving faster and faster towards you and Jungwon, and you know you can’t just yank Jungwon’s arm and pull you both away from the crash.

Your heart sinks as you come to the realisation that it’s either you, or him.

And you can’t lose him again. 

The car moves closer and closer, and you know in just a few seconds, Jungwon’s about to be hit. “Wonie, I’m sorry.” you say hurriedly, blinking back the tears in your eyes before you push him towards the opposite side of the street, out of harm’s way. 

Flashing lights. Loud car honks. And this time, it is your body that the car collided with. 

You fall to the ground, feeling nothing but pain everywhere in your body — you’re bleeding, you’re sure of it. You pant as you lie there, and you hear Jungwon’s loud scream when he realises what just happened to you. “No, no, no.” Jungwon shakes his head as he rushes over to be by your side.

“(Name)? (Name)? Look at me, look at me please.” Jungwon says, his hands clutching yours desperately.

You look up at him weakly, with a small, sad smile. “I’m sorry, Won.” 

“Please don’t leave me, (Name). Just hold on, we’re getting help.” Jungwon says, his lower lip quivering as he holds onto you tightly. His hands are stained with blood, your blood, but he is too focused on your state to notice.

“There’s no use, Jungwon. You and I both know I’m not going to make it out alive.” you choke out, and Jungwon shakes his head. “You’ll make it. I know you will.” he says, and you smile sadly. 

“I know I won’t. Jungwon… I know how this ends. I’m from the future.” you say, and you can feel yourself getting weaker and weaker. “I’m the (Name) from 5 years later. It was originally you who died in this crash. I went back in time to try and save you… but I failed.” 

“Why didn’t you let it be me, (Name)? It should’ve been me.” Jungwon says, holding back a choked sob. “Why?” 

“I couldn’t lose you again.”

“But now I’m losing you.” 

“I know… I’m sorry. I wanted it to end with you and me being able to spend more time together. Fate wasn’t in our favour, I guess.” you say, and Jungwon knows that he’s going to lose you soon. Your breathing is more laboured, and he knows you’re fighting to keep your eyes open, because if you close them, you don’t know if you’ll ever get to open them again.

“You’ll be okay, (Name). You’ll make it.” 

Jungwon says it as if he’s just trying to convince himself. He knows deep in his heart that he’ll be losing you today, and there’s nothing he can do to try and reverse it. But oh, how he wished he could. 

“Can you just… talk to me?” you say, looking at him, tears brimming your eyes. Jungwon squeezes your hand, brushing your hair out of your face — and that is when he realises that your blood is on his hands. 

Tears roll down his cheeks, but he tells himself he shouldn’t start properly sobbing until you go. 

“Okay.” he says. “Today is your birthday. I was going to give you a surprise party. Intak, Youngeun, Hikaru, and all your other friends would be there, and I even got Maeumi a party hat for you.”

You smile at his words. 

“I have plans for tomorrow, too. We’ll go to the Han River, have a picnic, and watch a movie on my iPad. We could walk Maeumi at the park, too.” 

Jungwon pulls one tiny box out of his pocket. “This is your birthday gift, he tells you, opening the box. There are two silver rings inside, and Jungwon pulls one of them out.

“I got us promise rings.” he says, and your smile gets wider. He slips it onto your finger, and you smile, trying your best to look at it even though you can feel yourself starting to slip away.

“I love you.” he says, blinking back tears. “I always will.” 

“I love you too,” you whisper back, and Jungwon tries his best to smile. He has to be strong in this moment for you. He doesn’t want the last thing you see to be him sobbing. He wants you to feel at peace. 

“I’ll find my way back to you.” Jungwon whispers, bringing your hand up to his face to kiss the promise ring. There’s a small smile on your lips, and then your hand falls limp.

You’re gone.

And that’s when Jungwon completely loses it.

He lets the dam break. He’s crying and screaming like he’s never before. It’s right then when the ambulance arrives, and when the paramedics tell him that he needs to let go, he just drowns out the sound, with the only thing he can hear being his own cries.

Jungwon is forcefully separated from you when one of the paramedics pulls him away from your body, as he kicks, screams and writhes in the man’s grip. The paramedic sets him down on a nearby park bench, patting Jungwon on the back as the boy cries.

“I know no matter what I say, it still won’t take away the pain you are feeling. It’s very hard to lose someone, especially someone who you held very close to your heart.” the paramedic says. “But, I’m very sorry for your loss.”

“It was supposed to be me.” Jungwon sobs. “I should’ve been the one who got hit. And now I’ve lost her.” 

“She saved your life. She’s a hero.” the paramedic tells him.

“I thought we would have more time together. It’s her birthday today. Or… was.” Jungwon chokes out through sobs. You’re gone now, so he supposed that he has to refer to you in past tense. But he doesn’t want to. “We were going to her surprise party that I organised for her.”

“I’m sure she would have loved it.” the paramedic tells him.

“I wish she could’ve seen it.” Jungwon says, wiping his tears with his sleeve. He then notices that your blood is still on his hands, and his sobs get even louder.

The paramedic pats his back in an attempt to comfort him. “You’ll be okay, kid. You’ll be okay.” 

Despite what the paramedic says, Jungwon feels like he won’t be okay. 

He doesn’t know if he ever will be.

THREE. present day, 2027.

“Happy birthday, Jungwon!” 

It has been 6 years since you left. Jungwon has never liked his birthday celebrations after your passing, only indulging in them because his friends spent so much time preparing it all for him.

“Thank you guys.” Jungwon says, mustering up a smile.

Intak tells him to blow out his candles. “Make a wish!” 

Jungwon wishes for you to come back.

It has been his wish every single year since your passing. Yet, every single year, it doesn’t seem to come true. Jungwon knows that he should move on — it’s what you would have wanted, but he finds that he can’t.

Every hour, every minute, every second, his mind is consumed with the thought of you. Wondering if he can bring you back, thinking about all the fun things that you two could do if you were still here, and praying to whoever’s up there to take pity on him, and bring you back.

“I got you a little something, Jungwon.” Intak says, pulling out a gift bag from behind him. He hands it to Jungwon, who accepts it with a small smile. “Thank you, Intak.” he says.

He opens the bag to reveal a box. It’s a necklace, with a butterfly chain necklace. “It was (Name)‘s. I got it for her birthday last year, before she decided to… you know. Go back in time. I figured that you might want it.”

Jungwon looks at the necklace with a sad smile. “She really liked it, didn’t she?” 

“Loved it.” 

“I know every year doesn’t get easier for you,” Intak says, and Jungwon nods. “It doesn’t get easier for us either. We didn’t know she had this whole plan to bring you back… until she wa gone. And I say this every year, but you’ve got to stop blaming yourself for her passing.” 

“I know.” Jungwon replies. “It’s hard not to, though.” 

“I get it.” Intak says, pressing his lips into a thin line. “Healing is a process. It takes time.” 

“I got you something too,” Youngeun suddenly pipes up. She pulls out a box from behind her, setting it on the table. She pushes it towards Jungwon, who opens it hesitantly.

There are a bunch of film pictures of you and Jungwon. They look like the one he took back in high school, but since he’s in it, he couldn’t possibly have taken it. 

“You were not the only photographer in high school.” Youngeun says. “These are photos that our lovely Hikaru took of you two. We found her old camera, and then we found these photos and got them developed. Thought you would like to see them.”

Jungwon smiles as he flicks through the photos, each of them bringing him back in time. He sees picture after picture of you looking at him with the brightest smile, your eyes practically sparkling as you gaze at him lovingly. 

Jungwon would give anything to see you look at him like that again. 

Every single year, on not only your birthday but also his, he has blamed himself for your passing. You had gone back in time to try and stop the event that had killed him in the original timeline, but it only led to that event killing you instead. 

He desperately wishes for you to still be here. Every birthday celebration reminds him of the one that he had organised just before your passing, the one that you were mere minutes away from seeing before your life was taken. 

The healthy thing for Jungwon to do is move on. 

So on the 6th anniversary of your death, and also your birthday, Jungwon heads to your grave, holding a small cake in a box and a bouquet of cherry blossoms – your favourite flowers. He sits down on the grass, pulling the photos that Hikaru had taken back in high school out of his bag. 

“It’s been 6 years since you left.” Jungwon says out loud. He hopes you can hear him. “It’s also your birthday.” He opens the box, taking out the cake. He takes a lighter out of his bag, lighting the candle. “Happy birthday, (Name).” 

He sings you the happy birthday song quietly, setting the cake down on the lid of the box. “I miss you. I hope you’re celebrating your birthday happily.” he says, a bittersweet smile on his lips. 

“Every year doesn’t get easier,” he confesses. “Is this how you felt before you had gone back in time to try and save me?” 

He asks a question he knows he won’t get an answer to. 

“I would do anything to bring you back. Maybe I should try what you did. Maybe Hikaru’s pictures can bring me back in time too.” Jungwon says, looking at the picture. The flame on the candle flickers, and for a split second, Jungwon debates on burning one of the photos to see if it can bring him back. 

He stays silent for a little while, staring sadly at your headstone. There’s a bunch of other flowers placed around it, which Jungwon deduces must be from your family and other friends who came earlier. 

Jungwon takes a look at the promise ring on his finger. For a second, the candle on the cake flickers, and for a split second, Jungwon sees a photo being held above a fire, with the picture being slowly burnt away. He blinks quickly a couple of times, and the vision is gone. 

He looks at the candle once again, and then he looks at the picture held in his hands. 

Without a second thought, Jungwon holds the picture above the flame.

The only thought in Jungwon’s mind as he watches the picture burn away is that he hopes that his birthday wish for the past 6 years can come true. 

the fics ended, and all i can think about is verkwan being lil shits in the end 😂 and, that part about being ‘unable to confide in your friend, or a friend’ is sadly relatable 😭

ten dates: unmatched! (l.cn)

𖥻 . . pairing: non-idol!chan x fem!reader

𖥻 . . wc: 17.9k

𖥻 . . au(s): exes to enemies not really(?) to lovers; rom-com, angst, smut

𖥻 . . summary: once you and chan broke up, you decided to be cordial enough to stay friends with him. however, you’ve finally moved on and are taking on dating again. as you beg chan for advice, you should've known he’d grow tired of it.

𖥻 . . warnings: explicit language, alcohol is mentioned a ton, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex (wrap the willy silly), chan says “pretty girl” quite a bit, he also has a pretty big gratification kink.

a/n: minors do NOT interact! also, reader is race neutral. i finally finished! this was proofread quite a bit, yet there might still be mistakes :\ feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! i hope you all enjoy! :))

date one.

it was an ordinary saturday night. people in their early 20s would be out, getting drunk with pals, clubbing with the right people, having one-night stands, yet here you were, decked out in a tight dress and uncomfortable heels in a fancy restaurant with the worst date. the man you got to know on tinder was not who he presented himself to be in real life… obviously. the man, yoon jeonghan, that was supposed to be focused on you had his intentions set on a poor waitress that was oblivious to his advances. it wasn’t that he was focusing more on her, it was more so he wasn’t being interested in anything but her, a weird infatuation of sorts. he spared you a glance once or twice, his eyes widening with shock once he, what you assumed, remembered why he was at the restaurant in the first place. 

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we definitely need a sequel to this 😮‍💨

Best Friends

✧ pairing: kim sunwoo x best friend fem! reader

✦ genre: fwb + smut

✧ warnings: 18+ (minors DNI) smut, doggy style, unprotected sex, pet names, cursing, angst??? lowkey unrequited love, lmk if i’m missing anything else!

✦ word count: 1.9k words

✧ synopsis: sunwoo is secure in what you two have, while you end up getting sidetracked and catching little feelings for your best friend.

✦ note: this is based off the weeknd’s song “best friends.” highly underrated song imo. i hope y’all enjoy xx

(i might write a prequel to this of when it all started, but only if i get motivated, lol. though, this is a stand-alone fic!)

༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘

You lie naked on your abdomen over his white sheets, lowered on your elbows, face down and ass in the air while Sunwoo fucks you from behind.

You’re entranced by the intoxicating feeling of your best friend’s thick cock thrusting in and out of your wet cunt. His hips are ramming against your ass rhythmically, causing your body to bounce right back against him at the animalistic act.

His finger nails gripped your hips and buttocks as he fucked you relentlessly, so hard that you’d be left with bruises and crescent shaped marks over your flesh.

A pillow pressed against your face muffles the whimpers and moans leaving your throat. Sunwoo tsks at your suppressed sounds and doesn’t hesitate in grabbing a fistful of your hair into a makeshift ponytail, yanking your head away from what’s shielding your noises and pulling your head upwards.

Immediately forced to now be on all fours, your fingers gripped his sheets while you yelp in a mixture of pain and pleasure at his harsh hold and cock navigating your tight walls.

“Come on, let me hear you, doll,” Sunwoo grunts as he continues to move his length in and out of you.

He now hears you panting clearly and a smirk plasters over his face listening to your fucked out breathing in response to his cock bringing you stimulation.

“Is girly gettin’ her brains fucked out so good that she can’t catch a breath?” Sunwoo lifts a hand to grab the flesh of your ass cheek, massaging the skin before he gives it a harsh slap.

“Ahhh fuck— Sunwoo!” your head snapped back at the stinging his hand left, yelling in response to his roughness.

He chuckles smugly at your reaction, and continues to ram into you.

“Would’ve never guessed you liked it rough for such a cute, sweet girl.”

“Should’ve known when you basically begged me to use you like a rag doll after one month into meeting me.”

You felt that you have completely lost all your senses from the overwhelming sensation of warmth and fullness from Sunwoo’s cock.

You’re insanely horny, starting to pound back shamelessly to fuck as much of him as you can, feeling his cock so hard that it hurts so good.

“Greedy girl, huh?” his hands move around your hips while his own slam into you harder, his sweaty balls clapping ferociously against your cunt.

More filthy noises ranging from high to low escaped your mouth as you were on cloud nine.

You were so overwhelmed in stimulation from fucking.

The lewd sounds of you guy’s intense breathing and moaning, the wetness of your sex, and the sound of the bed creaking.

Your body being shaken and boobs bouncing from his hips plunging against your ass.

His hot cock pounding your warm pussy and tight walls, providing pleasurable friction.

Pure euphoria.

Your cunt’s walls squeezed around Sunwoo’s length once he starts hitting the jackpot that is your g-spot, eliciting a groan from his throat at the vibrations sent straight to his cock as a result of your clenching.

“Getting ready to cum? Let it all out, doll. Show me how much you enjoy being fucked dumb,” he grunts out, movements continuing frenetically.

“Oh—fuck!” You hiss at the familiar feeling of a coil in the pit of your stomach making an appearance. So fucking tight.

The penetration angle starts to become so intense that your pussy is ready to soak his cock in your cum.

Your mouth forms an ‘o’ shape as you cry out, seeing stars while quivering.

Your heart rate increases, ears are ringing, and legs shake as you let go, coating his cock in your cum and juices.

You groan and groan again at your release, completely letting yourself fall face into the pillow you were over earlier.

“That’s right doll, s’ good.” Sunwoo praises, hands still holding your hips as he chases his own release for a couple seconds more, listening to your muffled whines in overstimulation.

You feel his dick pulsate and twitch before he pulls out, hissing at his warm cock leaving your walls.

You unfortunately can’t see him, since you’re faced down on the pillow all fucked out as he starts to jerk himself off at a fast pace.

He grunts lowly, jaw slack and muscles clenching while spewing his hot ropes of cum across your ass.

“Fuuuuck,” his voice trembles in feeling the wave of tingly pressure within each pump and in seeing the whitish fluid coating your butt cheeks.

You were infatuated with the way he fucks you from behind. The roughness of it all, and how you have become his prey.

Although Sunwoo never cummed inside of you (he says it’s because that would be too intimate) you enjoy feeling his semen paint your skin after every fuck, finding it submitting and erotic.

Sunwoo likes to fuck you from behind and as he pleases because he’s using you to release his frustrations as a college student athlete.

You let him use you like a rag doll because you have an attraction to him— of which, he knows about.

And it’s starting to become harder to ignore when you look like you want to pour your heart out to him when you two talk and after every sexual encounter, when he just wants to have casual sex.

He likes fucking you from behind because he rather not see that dreamy look in your eyes as you guys have sex, or he might end up getting too caught up past what it is.

And Lord knows he can’t do that.

He stumbles over from his own fucked out daze, parking his rear on the bed right in front of you.

You two take a minute to regulate your breaths and bodies, shivers and spasms flooding the each of you as you recover from intercourse.

You crane your head to look back at Sunwoo. Wisps of his black hair are fallen over his forehead, sticking to his skin in sweat from the adrenaline and physical activity.

He meets your gaze for a brief moment with a lopsided grin. He then shifts his eyes over to your ass milked in his cum.

Your eyes follow his gaze and you slightly move, feeling the soreness of your cunt and the juices that are slipping out, definitely staining his sheets.

His weight on the mattress disappears as he gets up, walking away for a moment to find a towel in his bathroom.

He comes back swiftly, goosebumps dancing across your body once the towel in his hands makes contact with your skin.

He gently begins cleaning you up, wiping off his cum from your butt cheeks and cleaning up your own mess from your cunt.

You hum as he wipes the body fluids off, the scent of your natural pheromones and sweat filling your nostrils.

Sunwoo chuckles seeing the flesh of your ass move at him rubbing the towel against your skin. He doesn’t hesitate to playfully slap the cheeks, resulting in you gasping and then wincing at the sensitivity.

Your teeth catch your bottom lip as you bite back a smile. It doesn’t end up reaching your face as it falters instead, watching him walk over to his nightstand to pick up his phone to check the time instead of laying next to you with you in his embrace.

And that’s when the post-nut clarity crashes all down on you.

“I gotta wash up before the game,” a hand of Sunwoo’s goes to scratch the back of his head, eyes evidently avoiding your gaze.

You simply nod and purse your lips, feeling the awkwardness you two normally shared post-sex.

He walks around his room and rummages through drawers to find fresh clothes for his shower. You simply watch as he does so, loneliness and shame beginning to creep up over your mind.

His body suddenly makes way towards you, and you perk up, thinking he’ll finally kiss you—a forehead kiss you at least hope, only to weakly smile when his hand reaches on the top of your head, ruffling your hair messily.

“Thanks, doll.” he whispers softly. His hand falls to his side and he wets his plump lips with his tongue.

Your eyes fall onto said lips, secretly longing for them to sync with yours. You crave that affection from him sometimes, past the rough sex you two have.

How foolish of you to think he’d give you more.

Sunwoo purses his lips as he sees your eyes observe them. His body shifts uncomfortably, feeling awkward from the atmosphere.

He sighs lightly as he begins to trudge towards his bathroom, stopping once he reaches the doorway to turn and look at you.

“You coming to the game tonight?” he questions with a nod.

“Yeah, i’m going with the girls as per usual.” you tilt your head and prompt your elbow up to rest your chin on the palm of your hand as you peer at him.

“Cool,” he sheepishly smiles. “You can grab something from the kitchen if you’d like, as always. I’ll see you later, y/n.”

And with that, he fully enters the bathroom and shuts the door.

Sunwoo quietly blows out air as he shuts himself in the bathroom, lids closing as he begins to feel like an asshole.

It’s heavily apparent that you want more from him, but he simply couldn’t offer you that. It wasn’t part of your agreement in this friend’s with benefits relationship.

He was the star soccer player. Notorious for breaking hearts as he prioritized the sport above meaningful relationships.

He didn’t think he was capable of balancing a relationship right now. It wasn’t in his cards. He was selfish and thought with his dick.

He also wanted to focus on being a good player while balancing school and maintaining his popularity.

Sex was an outlet for him. It made sense to just have casual flings and not put any meaning to it aside from fulfilling his sexual desires.

So when you approached him with the idea of doing anything to relieve his frustrations one night after a shitty game, who was he to refuse?

You two fucked hard when Sunwoo needed you. He fucked your throat and your cunt well after every encounter.

His only rules were no kissing, he won’t cum inside you, and your relationship remain a secret to anyone and everyone. It was plainly no strings attached.

He didn’t want to be held responsible for your heart if you two fall.

But as time went on, deep down, he knows he’s tearing you apart.

And you allow him to do so.

You swallow hard as he closed the door. Your body still lies naked on his bed, having no desire to get up.

Your face falls into your hands, sighing in frustration at the position you’ve put yourself in.

Unfortunately though, what sucks is that you rather have him like this than nothing at all.

There’s a power imbalance inherent in this with you on the downside, because of your stupid feelings.

You wanted Sunwoo so bad.

For his flirty personality and natural charm. For his respectful manners even though he fucks you like a whore. For his passion when he’s playing his heart out on the field. For his relaxed attitude towards others and life. For how he gets easily scared at the slightest of noises and things, of which, makes you laugh.

Your heart has caught up to you and it’s fucking you up.

You realized you don’t want to have sex as friends no more.

༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘ ༻༺❘

just two lovers reconnecting 😫

Disconnected | ljh x reader

It's been three weeks since Jihoon spoke to you for longer than a few minutes, since he came to bed before you were asleep, since he looked you in the eyes and told you he loved you. 

You know he does, of course, but you haven’t felt any evidence of it lately. 

Rating: M (18+) | WC: ~5.0k | Pairing: ljh x reader | Genre: hurt/comfort, angst, smut

Warnings: distant!neglectful!jihoon, eating issues, marriage problems, anxiety, partial solving of marriage problems, small mention of pregnancy/having kids (like one part of a sentence)

Smut Warnings: body worship, breast play, biting/marking, oral f. rec., fingering

Reader Notes: has breasts and a vagina, there’s a shower scene where reader takes care of their hair and i believe it should work for different textures but if it doesn’t lmk, chubby but its not a plot point

You look across the dining table at Jihoon, finding him absorbed in his phone as he chews and taking the chance to stare at him for just a bit longer. 

He doesn’t spare you a glance, and your eyes go to your untouched food. You haven’t been hungry lately, eating is the last thing on your mind when you’re feeling like this, when he’s spending most hours of the day at the studio, and devoting the remaining time to anyone but you. 

It's been three weeks since he spoke to you for longer than a few minutes, since he came to bed before you were asleep, since he looked you in the eyes and told you he loved you. 

You know he does, of course, but you haven’t felt any evidence of it lately. 

This is the life you signed up for, you try to remind yourself, but that doesn’t make it better. It doesn’t soothe the caustic burn in your throat that always comes when you’re suppressing tears, or make his side of the bed warm when you slide under the covers alone, and it especially doesn’t remind him to text you more than the stilted responses you’ve counted yourself lucky to receive. 

But here he is, tapping away at his phone and shoveling bites of the food you cooked for him into his mouth, too engrossed in whoever he’s texting to even notice your gaze on him. You doubt he’ll realize you’ve gotten up until he’s finished eating, so you scoot away from the table and take your food to the kitchen. 

There’s no point in letting it sit out when you’re not going to eat it, and you’re beginning to find you can hardly even bear the smell with your stomach roiling like this. You tilt your plate over the glassware, scraping your dinner into the dish and closing the lid with a click before storing it in the fridge with a sigh. 

Now that Jihoon is home and fed, you don’t really know what to do with yourself. 

While he’s gone, you take care of things around the house, do some freelance writing, tell yourself that maybe today, he’ll come home and be like he used to be. 

Then when he does come home and greets you with a distracted hello and a flash of a kiss on the cheek before heading into his home studio, you find yourself feeling bereft, listless, just like you do now. 

You suppose you could take a shower, maybe let a few tears slip under the cover of the water, blame your red, swollen eyes on shampoo, not that he’d bother to ask. Or even notice. 

With your mind only half made up, you float on mindless feet to the bedroom and peel the clothes from your body, stopping by the dresser to grab some pajamas. You can hear utensils clacking against porcelain, so you know he’s still eating and likely won’t be coming into the bathroom at least until you’re done. 

You don’t know why, but when he’s distant like this, you don’t like to let him see you naked. 

Maybe it’s because you already feel stripped to your nuts and bolts, maybe it’s because he doesn’t feel like your Jihoon. Either way, you prefer to be clothed around him, to at least have one extra barrier between him and you lest he see how vulnerable and unguarded you are. 

The shower is comforting, warm enough you can almost pretend it’s his arms around you instead, though you stop yourself every time, unwilling to endure the pain once the fantasy fades. You hug yourself, try to hold your broken pieces together as water rains down on you and tears start to bubble over. 

Biting back a sob, you take in a shuddering breath and reach for your shampoo, telling yourself that you’ve gotten through this before and you will again. Every time you hear those words in your mind, they feel a little less true, a little less sure. 

You step back under the flow of water, rinsing the suds from your hair and squeezing out the excess moisture before coating the strands in conditioner. It needs to sit for a few minutes so you let yourself sink down to the heated tiles of the shower basin, shifting out of the spray and resting your back against the bench. 

You tuck your knees up, loosely wrapping your arms around them and staring into the mist as if it contains the solutions to all of your problems. Your mind wanders back to Jihoon, and you feel your heart drop into your stomach as you wonder how much longer you realistically can take this. 

It’s not like you haven’t talked to him about it before. The first time it happened was early in your relationship, maybe around the one year mark. You suffered in silence for a month, wondering if something had changed, if he’d met someone else, if he didn’t want you like he used to. You were close to breaking it off when he finally came out of it, apologizing for going radio silent on you and telling you it wouldn’t happen again. 

And for two years, it didn’t. For two years, he was perfect, and present, and near ecstatic to show you his love. Then, it happened again, though you only let it last for two and a half weeks before you sat him down and told him you needed him to come back, to figure out how to balance music and you, how to make his life with you work with his life outside of you, even when it gets busy. 

He agreed, and instantly made a change for the better, showing you how willing and able he was to manage his relationship with you and his work. That’s partially why this time is so painful - you know he’s capable of putting in the effort, you just don’t know if he can recognize when he’s not. 

And it might be immature, it might be selfish, it might be both, but this time, you want him to figure it out on his own. You want him to see that he’s neglecting you, and make the change without you having to ask him to, even if it means you suffer in the meantime. 

You grab your comb from the ledge and start detangling your hair, almost thankful for the tears that arise because they mean you’re crying about something other than him, for once. When the comb glides, you hold it under the water to clean it off, setting it back on the ledge and begrudgingly rising to your feet. 

Your head tilts back as you rinse, your hands smoothing over your hair until the silky feeling of the conditioner washes out. You give your body a good scrub, rubbing with your exfoliating gloves until you feel brand new before stepping back under the water and letting it all wash down the drain. 

You stare at the running water for a while, your thoughts as difficult to pin down as the droplets racing toward the small grate in the floor. The shower won’t run cold, not with the two heaters Jihoon had installed when you were building the place, so there’s nothing but the fear of wasting water keeping you from staying in the safe, spacious cubicle for the rest of the night. 

Unfortunately, you didn’t grow up in a wasteful household so you can’t linger, shutting the shower off now that you’re done and reaching for your leave-ins. You layer them into your hair and squeeze out the extra water, wrapping your head up in a turbie twist and grabbing a towel from the warmer. 

Draping it over your shoulders, you hug yourself again, staring at your shivering form in the slowly defogging mirror and wishing you had Jihoon to hold you instead. 

Even with that wish, you still jump and suck in a sharp gasp when he appears in the doorway. Immediately, you tuck the towel around yourself, hiding your body from him and looking anywhere but into his eyes. Your shoulders bunch up in discomfort, the skin fully exposed thanks to your wrapped hair, the lingering drops of water feeling like ice under his gaze. 

His eyebrows furrow, his mouth opening as if to speak, before he closes it and averts his eyes, murmuring, “I, uh… came to tell you I would be in my studio for a few hours.” 

You don’t know why he’s warning you, he never does when he’s absent like this, but you quietly say, “Okay,” waiting for him to leave so you can get dressed. 

Except he doesn’t. He just stands there, halfway in the door, halfway out, his gaze barely to the left of you and suddenly deep, dark, like a bottomless well. 

You feel like you can’t breathe trapped in here with him like this, with your ghost of a husband. More than that, you feel exposed, your frayed nerves sparking with the urge to flee, his presence eliciting your fight or flight response. You should leave out the fight, this time, considering the fact that you’d almost rather perish than speak to him further at this moment. How far could you get, you wonder, before he’d notice? 

Tomorrow, when he’s wrapped up in his work again, maybe you’ll catch a train, a plane, go somewhere warm and sunny, somewhere that isn’t here. 

“I’m doing it again, aren’t I?” He asks slowly, his dark eyes sharp on you through the mirror, knowing. 

And this is what you wanted, isn’t it? You wanted him to figure it out on his own, to put it together without you spelling it out for him, but now that he has, you don’t know what to do. So, you just nod, grabbing your pajamas off the vanity and locking yourself in the closet so you can finally change, finally cover yourself up, finally have another barrier between you and Jihoon. 

When you finish getting dressed and taking care of your hair, you find yourself almost scared to open the doors, not knowing what will be waiting for you when you come out. Still, you take a deep breath and wade through the anxiety, pushing open the doors and stopping short when you realize the bathroom is empty. 

Maybe he went into his studio anyway. 

Maybe he doesn’t care, maybe he’s tired of having someone who requires his attention, his affection. Maybe he doesn’t love you like he used to, and just doesn’t know how to say it. 

You’ve worked yourself into a state of numb teariness by the time you enter the bedroom and find him sitting on the duvet, his head in his hands and his back to you. He jumps to his feet when he hears you, rushing over and taking hold of your hands to guide you to the bed. Confused, you let him push your shoulders down, watching as he settles on his knees in front of you and takes your hands again. 

“Baby, I’m sorry,” he says emphatically, his voice choked up and his face tight with anguish. “I - I never should have let myself get so focused on work. I knew that I missed you, but I didn’t realize how bad it was until you left in the middle of dinner.”

Huh. You didn’t think he’d notice. 

“I finally looked up from my stupid fucking phone and you were gone, and I could hear the shower running so I came to check on you, and I heard you crying,” he bites his lips between his teeth and looks away, his eyebrows pushed together and his face slowly reddening. You realize he’s trying not to cry, himself, and start to pull your hands from his so you can cup his face. 

He doesn’t let you, his grip too strong for you to break and his eyes angry when he looks back at you, though you know better than to think he’s angry with you. “You shouldn’t need to comfort me right now, I should be comforting you. I’m the one that fucked up, that’s been fucking up.”

You don’t speak, assuming he wants to get all of this out at once. He takes a deep breath before continuing, “When I heard you crying, I started thinking about the past few weeks, and I realized how absent I’ve been. I can’t even remember the last time I really kissed you, and that’s ridiculous. I’m your husband, I should be kissing you and telling you I love you every single fucking day, cherishing you like you deserve, reminding you how grateful I am that you’re in my life.”

“I’m lucky you didn’t fucking leave,” he all but sobs, his face crumpling as he turns and hides his face from you in his shoulder. Again, you try to take your hands back, and this time, he lets you. He lets you cup his cheek and swipe away the tears that fell, he lets you pull him up until he’s sitting next to you, he lets you tug him into your arms and hold him close. 

He shudders against you, burying his face in your neck and wrapping his big arms around you, lifting and rearranging you so you’re sitting in his lap instead of next to him. You wish you could get closer but you can’t, your chest is already pressed to his and your hips are aligned, your knees folded on either side of his body as he holds you. 

“I love you too much to ever leave, Jihoon,” you sigh, leaving out the fact that you did briefly consider it before bundling him up in your arms when that just makes him shudder out a sob and hold you tighter. 

“I love you so fucking much, and I swear on everything, I will never let this happen again,” he promises, and this time, you really think it might be true. 

.

You spend the rest of the night together, laying in bed. Sometimes you just stare at each other, sometimes you talk, sometimes you laugh. You even cry once out of sheer relief, a brief catharsis that makes Jihoon tear up and hold you so tight, you can’t breathe. 

When it’s time to go to sleep, he strips to his boxers and wraps himself around you, his body more on your side of the bed than his. It’s like he can’t stand to be separated from you now that he’s brought himself back, now that he’s realized how far away from you he was. You think he might even climb into your skin, given the chance. 

You rest better than you have in weeks, sleeping soundly through the whole night with his breaths on the back of your neck and his arms wrapped around you, and when you wake, he’s still there. 

You’ve changed positions, shifted to lay on his chest with an arm and a leg thrown over his body. He’s awake already, one elbow bent behind his head as he stares at you, and after you check the time, you ask, “Don’t you have to go into the studio today?” 

“No, I told them I wasn’t coming in when I woke up,” he smiles softly, tracing his fingers up and down your back, making you shiver against him. 

“When did you wake up?” You ask, slightly confused because you normally rise before him, especially on days he has to work. 

“Like an hour ago, had a nightmare,” he murmurs, making your eyebrows furrow in concern. His fingers stop drifting over your back and come up to smooth away the wrinkle in between your eyebrows as he says, “It’s my own fault.” 

“You can’t be at fault for having a nightmare, Jihoon,” you remind him gently, tilting your face into his hand when he cups your cheek. 

“I can be when the nightmare is that you packed a bag and left,” he says distantly, like his mind is far away. “I haven’t been able to take my eyes off you since it woke me up.” 

“I’m not going anywhere,” you promise him. “This just can’t happen again, especially now that we’re married.”

“I know,” he agrees in a soft voice, his face pensive. “I think we, or maybe I, should go to couples counseling.” 

You hum, biting your lip as you think it over. His thumb tugs at it, pulling down until you’re no longer digging your teeth into the flesh. “I think that’s a good idea. For both of us.” 

“I’ll do some research then,” he smiles down at you, brushing his thumb over your slightly indented bottom lip. You smile back, rising up on your elbow to lean in and press your lips to his. 

This is the first kiss you’ve shared since the rushed, absentminded peck you got yesterday morning, and Jihoon must realize because his hand forms around your cheek again and his fingers slide into your hair, pulling you closer and holding you there. 

You can feel all the love, the devotion, the adoration he’s pouring into it, his sunshine glowing through the fractures in your heart and slowly filling them in, like dandelions growing in the cracks of a sidewalk. 

Time slips away and your thoughts do too, your brain empty but for Jihoon as he kisses you breathless. Your elbow starts to shake, the position a bit awkward for you to be putting all of your weight on it, and he, of course, notices. You don’t expect him to roll over and brace himself above you, his body held away from yours by sheer strength, so you gasp when you find yourself under him, surrounded by him. 

It’s slightly overwhelming, being so utterly ensconced by him, but you love it, would stay here huddled under him for the rest of time if you could. The world could be falling apart around you and you wouldn’t have a clue, you’re so entranced by him. 

“Baby, I don’t deserve it, but… I want to show you how much I love you. Can I?” He asks sincerely, his voice wavering with emotion. You’re about to answer with a vehement yes before he continues, “If you’re not ready, I won’t ask again, I’ll let you come to me.” 

You won’t remind him that this is (partially) what you’ve been wanting for the past month, instead telling him, “I’m ready, Jihoon. I want you to show me.”

His smile is nearly blinding, so wide and bright you want to shield your eyes, though you wouldn’t miss a second of this, of him, for anything. 

He kisses you again, sipping from your lips like they hold the nectar of the gods, like you’re his salvation, and you kiss him back in much the same way, your eyes fluttering shut and your arms coming up to wrap around his neck. 

One hand delves into his hair when he trails kisses across your cheek and over your jaw, his mouth suctioning over your pulse point so he can feel your heart beat for him. And maybe it does, maybe that’s why you feel so lifeless without him, so faint, as if a strong gust of wind could blow you away. 

But it’s also why you feel so vibrant now, why you’re lit up from the inside, why the effects of his love shine through every pore. 

His mouth meanders to the spot under your ear that always makes you shiver, and he spends eons there, licking and sucking and biting until you’ve got your legs wrapped around his waist and his name on your lips. 

By the time he moves on to your breasts, you’re dazed, barely able to help him take off your pajama shirt. He has to straddle you to free up his hands and tug it off, and you come back online just in time to watch his eyes darken as they drag over your exposed skin. You’re not shy anymore, content to lay there and let him look his fill, your hands resting above your head, lifting your breasts. 

His hands cover them before his lips do, his palms warm and soft where they cup the weighty flesh, squeezing gently as his thumbs brush over your pebbled nipples. He leans down to suck one into his mouth, taking deep pulls that make your back arch into him as the sensation sparks through you. He can’t seem to settle on one side, always switching so neither are neglected, your breasts marked up and spit slick by the time his kisses start to dot your stomach. 

He’s always been vocal about how much he loves your belly, loves the soft pudge and the way it contracts when you laugh, loves filling it with food and covering it with kisses, would someday love to watch it grow with life. It’s no surprise when he settles between your legs and spends almost as much time on your stomach as he did on your breasts, his lips tracing every stretch mark and his teeth sinking into every curve. 

You’re trembling when he finally moves on to your hips, his fingers hooking in the waistband of your pajamas and starting to pull. You lift your ass to help, remembering at the last second that you put panties on too last night, unlike usual. Jihoon doesn’t seem to mind, kissing you over the fabric before pushing your legs apart and nipping a line up the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. 

He soothes the sting with his lips and tongue, working his way up to the apex of your thighs and licking you over the fabric when he gets to your covered cunt. You’ve grown wet enough for a small patch to form on the seat of your panties, and Jihoon uses the damp material to his advantage, firming his tongue and digging it into where he knows your entrance is. 

The feeling is soft, muted, but still good, and you can’t help but bring a hand down to tangle your fingers in his long, loose hair. He turns his head and presses one last kiss to your thigh before reaching up and starting to pull your panties down, his eyes heated and dark and laser focused on your pussy as it’s revealed to him. 

The underwear has barely cleared your feet when he pushes your legs apart again and leans down to suck in a deep breath through his nose, smelling your arousal and groaning before dragging his tongue through your folds for a taste. The noise that escapes him now is more like a whine, a punched out sound that comes from deep within his lungs, his fingers spasming on your thighs as he dips his tongue into your entrance. 

He’s barely started but you’re already moaning, already wanting for more, already on the verge of begging for his mouth around your clit or his fingers inside. He gives you neither, relearning the shape of you with lips and teeth and tongue, one of his hands shifting to your pussy so he can spread you apart and taste every square millimeter. 

It feels like a lifetime before he finally wraps his lips around your clit and sucks, and your response is instantaneous. Your back arches, your fingers clench in his hair, and your thighs snap closed around his head, making him push them apart with both hands, your pleasure soaked muscles no match for his. 

He brings you up just like this, with his palms pressing your thighs apart and his mouth on your clit, sucking and tapping and licking until you feel waves of bliss wash over you in a gentle release that leaves you floating. 

That’s just the beginning, you learn, as he lets one thigh fall so he can slide a finger into your still fluttering walls, his lips vibrating around your throbbing clit in a groan that you echo softly. He moves slowly, letting his finger glide in and out even though you both know you’re more than ready for another. 

“Jihoon, please,” you begin, lightly tugging on his hair, about to ask him for more.

“You don’t need to beg, baby,” he murmurs into you, sinking a second finger inside on the next stroke and spreading them to open you up. It’ll take more than two fingers to prepare you for his cock after three weeks of nothing, so you lay back and relax, content in the knowledge that soon enough, you’ll have everything you want. 

His fingers crook inside of you, stroking along your front wall, feeling for that patch of nerves inside that makes you gush for him. He finds it easily, his calloused, practiced fingertips rubbing and grinding into it, and you can feel the arousal seeping out of you, know it’s probably gathering in his palm now. 

He doesn’t care, doesn’t ever care how messy you get him, has even said he loves being coated in you by the end, loves tasting and feeling the physical evidence of how much you want him. It’s obvious in the way he moans when his mouth returns to your pussy, his tongue dipping between his fingers to get a taste at the source before laving up to your clit and wrapping his lips around it. 

He sucks hard, and you can tell that he’s starting to lose patience, to lose control, his hunger for you beginning to overcome his desire to be slow and gentle and sweet. That’s more than alright with you, Jihoon has spent enough time showing you how much he loves you, now you’re ready for him to show you how much he wants you too. 

When he withdraws his hand and returns with a third finger, you know it won’t be long before he’s filling you with his cock, and you can feel yourself get wetter at the thought. You almost want him to just give it to you now, to work himself inside even if you have to stretch around him, even if it hurts a little. 

But you know he’s on a mission so you let him carry it out, sighing at the sensation of false fullness as that burning coil starts to form in your stomach. It winds tighter and tighter as he slides his fingers in and out, every dig of his fingertips into your sweet spot making you gasp and pull his hair. Soon enough, you’re holding him in place and he’s letting you, grunting and groaning as you begin to roll your hips into his movements, his fingers precise and his mouth devastating. 

Finally, the coil catches flame and snaps, making your back arch and stealing every last thought in your mind as you cum so hard, you almost force his fingers out. He’s still stronger than you though, so he fights through your tightness to keep fucking you with them, bringing you through your orgasm and slowing only when you release his hair and pet his head with clumsy hands. 

When Jihoon comes to hover above you, you’re close to crying, so wrought with feelings and passion and love, you almost can’t handle it. But his face is glistening with you, practically dripping, which makes you choke out a laugh and sweep your finger along his jaw. 

You had planned to wipe it off on the duvet but he takes your hand and sucks your finger into his mouth, his eyes locked with yours, the darkness in them vast enough that you fear you might get lost. 

He releases your finger and presses his slick lips to yours, his tongue delving into your mouth so you can taste yourself. He cups your cheek with his non-sticky hand and tilts your head, changing the angle of the kiss and making it even deeper, eliciting a quiet moan from you as your legs hitch up on his waist and your arms wrap around his neck. 

You flex your legs, trying to bring his hips down to yours, but he stays braced over you, his body still inches away when you want him to be so close, you can’t tell where he ends and you begin. 

“Jihoon, I want you,” you break away to breathe, gazing into his eyes and watching as he wars with himself. 

“I don’t feel like I deserve you right now,” he admits solemnly, his eyelids fluttering when you shift one hand down to touch his rock hard cock. 

“What if I think you do?” 

“I’m glad you feel that way, but I just wanted this to be about you. I think we should wait,” he gets quieter at the end, as if he’s afraid of your response, and you can’t push him, not when it seems like he thinks you’ll be upset with him for saying no. 

“Okay,” you sigh, only the slightest bit of dejection seeping into your voice, though you try not to let it come through. 

“Thank you, baby,” he whispers before kissing you again. “Why don’t you get the bath started while I deal with this? I’ll come join you after.” 

“That’s a good plan,” you smile softly up at him, craning your neck for one last peck before he climbs off of you and lets you go. 

You slide to the edge of the bed and stand, about to hobble on shaky knees over to the bathroom when he catches your hand and pulls you between his legs. 

“I love you, so fucking much,” he says, his voice wavering and his eyes watery when they meet yours. 

You let the words wash over you like an ocean wave, the sentiment cleansing and healing and refreshing to your still-bruised spirit. 

“I love you, Jihoon,” you squeeze his hand and lean in when he pulls you, his lips meeting yours before they press to both of your cheeks and your forehead in sweet kisses. 

With your heart full of love and light, you make your way into the bathroom and start the tub, focusing on the sound of rushing water and valiantly trying to ignore the muffled noises coming from the bedroom. 

You’ve waited for Jihoon before, you can wait for him again. 

AN: don't look at me im self soothing

My Masterlist

a pot full of built-up tension and angst, so good that it could give you heartburn 😩❤️‍🔥

Heartbreak On The Dancefloor; Yeonjun

Genre: angst, fluff, best friends to lovers, model!Yeonjun, photographer!Yn,

Word count: 12.8K

Warnings: slight love triangle with Minho (sorry lino), alcohol, mentions of body insecurities, misunderstanding trope, a lot of pining, just hopeless losers being in love to be honest

Authors Note at the end of the fic!

Playlist: psychic-chris brown // jealous-nick jonas // save room for us-tinashe // you-regard // heartbreak on the dancefloor-sg lewis // up to me-lany // lmly-jackson wang // would you-the vamps // stockholm syndrome-one direction

"Ready?" The director asked and you quickly gave him a nod, holding up the camera in your hands as a way to confirm to him just how ready you were for this job.

He looked slightly unsure but nodded nonetheless, a sigh falling from his lips before he turned around.

"Okay, get back, everyone. We are starting again," he exclaimed and watched everyone return to set as the ten-minute break had reached its end.

Your eyes fell on supermodel Yeonjun Choi and his co-worker, a beautiful blond model, walking in with coffees in their hands, talking about something you couldn't hear. Yeonjun had a smirk adorning his lips as he told the woman a story and you had to refrain from rolling your eyes. He was such a flirt.

Just as you averted your focus back to your camera, the director turned to you once again with a stern expression on his face. "This is a big job, Yn Yln. You better prove to me that what I've heard about you is correct."

You felt someone stare at you from across the room and after glancing to the side, you received confirmation that your senses were correct. Yeonjun had his eyes on you.

You swallowed before quickly nodding. "Of course, sir," you stated politely, attempting to mask your nervousness.

He nodded before veering around to the models and staff members. "Third and last round! This time with a new photographer."

All eyes turned to you and you offered a clumsy wave. You caught the way Yeonjun looked down to hide his smile, causing your nerves to worsen. Was he laughing at your awkwardness?

After a minute and some makeup touch-ups on Yeonjun and his co-model Lana, everyone was back in position.

The director gave the two instructions on how to pose and it amazed you just how quickly they caught up on every instruction. They were undoubtedly talented.

You took a deep breath and were just about to bring your camera to your eyes when they found Yeonjun's dark ones, and you caught the wink he sent your way, which was presumably supposed to be a reassuring gesture but made your heart almost stop beating.

You let out an unsteady breath, not daring to react to him in any way. This shoot was too important for you to screw up, so in a second, your focus was back on your job.

Yeonjun noticed your professional side taking over and he couldn't help but swallow at how attractive the sight was.

The first flash illuminated the room and that was the start of the photoshoot.

For the first few shots, Lana had to stand behind a sitting Yeonjun with her arms draped over his shoulders and her hands slightly disappearing in his satin shirt.

Yeonjun looked into the camera with a seducing smirk on his lips and you could already imagine how amazing the pictures would come out, making your nerves slowly start calming down the more pictures you shot. If you hadn't been so focused on taking the pictures, you probably would've melted at how sexy Yeonjun looked.

You took multiple pictures from different angles as Yeonjun and Lana switched positions, and your mood was going up with every picture you shot.

The last position was Yeonjun standing behind Lana and him having to lower his face slightly into her neck.

But just as you were about to click on the button of your camera, Yeonjun looked up through his thick lashes and his eyes met yours once again, making your insides do a back flip.

"Eyes on Lana, Choi," the director ordered, and Yeonjun snickered at your flustered reaction before averting his eyes back to his co-worker.

You rolled your eyes frustratedly. What was he thinking?

After you shot the final picture, you heard the director's announcement that the shoot was over, which was followed by applause.

You lowered your camera and let out a breathy laugh, not being able to wrap your head around the fact that you just shot for Vogue.

People around you started congratulating each other for yet another successful photoshoot and after having discussed with the director when you were going to have the pictures ready, you went to get yourself a glass of water, your face practically glowing. This entire opportunity was perfect for your growing career as a photographer and to your relief, everything went smoothly and practically flawlessly. You had even caught the director proudly smiling once after peeking at your camera over your shoulder.

"So how's my little photographer feeling?"

The low voice in your ear made you almost let out a yelp as you put down the glass of water.

"Can you not sneak up on me like that?" You asked before turning around to face your best friend, who also happened to be the worldwide-known supermodel, Choi Yeonjun. To you, he was just Jun, though.

When you saw the excited expression on Yeonjun's face, you couldn't help but grin.

"She's feeling amazing," you responded earnestly, making Yeonjun's eyes turn into crescents.

"Well, she did amazing too."

You looked down. "Thank you, Jun. But I got lucky with a good model."

Yeonjun bit his lower lip, his cheeks immediately heating up. "Thank you-"

"Lana is perfect. You did well too, by the way," you interrupted him, a teasing smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

Yeonjun's smile dropped and got replaced with a scowl, making you let out a laugh.

"I'm just kidding, Jun. You are-," you looked away, not being able to look him in the eyes as the compliment was about to leave your lips, "-genuinely born to do this. Thank you so much for getting me this opportunity. I'm forever grateful. I don't even know how to repay you."

Yeonjun's heart sped up and his face softened at your genuine words.

"You deserved this opportunity more than anyone. I'm just glad I had the chance to show people your talents," he shrugged.

You blinked a few times as you looked at your best friend. "Thank you."

Yeonjun stared into your eyes and slowly started to feel himself zoning out from reality. Like it was only you and him standing in the room.

This happened a little too often lately.

"Jun?"

Your voice made Yeonjun snap out of the trance, and he quickly cleared his throat before forcing the infamous smirk to return to his face. "I know a way you can repay me, though," he winked.

You narrowed your eyes. It only ever meant bad news when he gave you this look.

"You're going to The Winter Event with me tomorrow."

You sighed. "Yeonjun, we both know I don't belong there-"

"Shush, you belong there more than anyone else."

You arched an eyebrow. "Why? I'm not a model. Hell, no one except you even knows me. I'll just embarrass myself with my looks next to all the supermodels, dude. What about; I wait for you at my place with wine and all the Friends episodes so you can come over and relax after the event, hm?"

"First of all, you're hotter than all of the models attending. Actually, you're just the hottest girl I know, period, and my opinion is always correct since I'm a guy with exquisite taste. But that's beside the point."

This made your cheeks heat up and your jaw almost drop. Almost, because you were certain he didn't actually mean his words. "I-"

"Second of all, binging Friends with you with a bottle of wine sounds amazing, so that's definitely still happening after the event. After we both get back from it. Because we are both going."

You rolled your eyes and nudged his shoulder with your fist. "You're so annoying, Choi, did you know that?"

Yeonjun grabbed your hand before you could retrieve it, making you look up surprised.

"I have heard so before, yes. I'm going to change now so we can go home," he stated before pulling you along with him to the dressing room.

"And I have to come with you?" You asked as you allowed your best friend to drag you through the halls.

"Yes, so we can discuss what time I'm picking you up tomorrow night," he responded without looking at you.

"Jun, I'm not going-"

"Oh, you so are," he interrupted before sending you a wink over his shoulder.

When you finally got into the dressing rooms, Yeonjun closed the door behind you and walked to the heap of clothes laying in the corner of the room.

You leaned against the door and watched Yeonjun as he searched for his hoodie in the pile of clothing.

"You're not going to ask me to turn around?" You teased, crossing your arms over your chest the moment he was about to start unbuttoning his satin shirt.

"Why would I? You're acting as if you have never seen me shirtless before," Yeonjun replied casually as he unbuttoned the first few buttons before looking at you through his lashes. Your eyes widened for a split second and Yeonjun mentally praised himself for flustering you, knowing you were the one trying to fluster him in the first place with your comment.

You huffed. "Dude, that sounds weird."

This made Yeonjun let out a heartfelt laugh as he dropped the satin shirt on the chair and you quickly averted your eyes to avoid accidentally staring at his toned upper body.

"It isn't illegal to look, you know?"

You rolled your eyes. "Yeonjun, if you don't shut up right now."

He laughed again and walked up to you. "Then what?"

"I'm done," you stated, turning around to leave the room. But just before you could even try to open the door, Yeonjun's hand had already sneaked past your body to lock it.

You felt your heart skip a beat and turned around to face him but for some reason, you had not expected his face to be this close to yours, causing you to almost jump.

"Have you never heard of personal space, Choi?"

"I have. But I don't mind sharing my personal space with you," he cheekily smiled.

Your heart was now hammering against your chest and you hated the way he was capable of flustering you this much. He was your best friend, for God's sake.

"That's cute. But I do mind sharing my personal space with you, so-" You shoved him away by pressing the palm of your hand to his forehead, and he let out a small huff.

"Boring."

You rolled your eyes and walked toward the chair to grab Yeonjun's hoodie before throwing it at him.

"Get changed, Casanova."

Halting in your tracks, you turned around. "Speaking of being a Casanova; your chemistry with Lana was through the roof today."

Your comment earned a surprised look from Yeonjun after he pulled the hoodie over his head, an action that tousled his gelled hair.

"It was?"

You hummed. "The way you looked at her? Damn."

He felt his insides turn hot at your statement. "Y-yeah?"

You grinned. "Why are you so shy all of a sudden?"

Yeonjun avoided your gaze and went to look for his sweatpants.

If only you knew the reason he was able to look at Lana like that was because he imagined you standing in front of him instead of her, maybe then you had reacted differently.

"I'm not getting shy. I'm just trying t-to find my stupid sweatpants- where are they!?" He groaned, making you chuckle.

You looked at him with a smug expression on your face and leaned against the door, making Yeonjun freeze when his eyes fell on you.

Why was it getting so hot in this room? He wondered as his eyes scanned you from head to toe, and let out a small breath before mentally slapping himself back to reality.

"Can you leave? I need to change my pants," Yeonjun ordered as he walked toward you.

"Oh, so now I have to leave?" You grinned and Yeonjun rolled his eyes as he pushed you out of the room.

"Pick something we can order for dinner," he murmured before successfully closing the door in your face.

He heard your laugh from the other side of the door, and couldn't help but let out a breathy chuckle as he rested his forehead against the door. Oh, what were you doing to him?

"I'm not going to the event tomorrow, by the way." Your voice sounded playful now but Yeonjun shook his head nonetheless as he went to grab his pants.

"I'll be at your door at eight. Either you're going to wear the dress I ordered and sent to your place or you're going to be dressed in sweatpants, I don't care. You're accompanying me either way."

You were glad he couldn't see your face when you heard he had ordered you a dress because your jaw was practically on the ground.

"O-oh my God, Yeonjun, I-"

"Please just wear the dress," he breathed.

For once, Yeonjun was grateful that he, even though he owned a lot of confidence, had just enough doubts and insecurities left in him to stop himself just in time from saying the second part of his thoughts out loud.

I need to see you in it.

You let out a shaky breath as you looked at yourself in the body-sized mirror in your bedroom. The satin material felt soft under your fingers as you smoothened it down. You shook your head and let out a small sigh. Even after having spammed Yeonjun with messages and a call freaking out about it and him responding with you deserve this, stop thanking me, you still just couldn't wrap your mind around the fact Yeonjun actually bought you the dress you wished for so badly.

TWO WEEKS EARLIER

"Yn, can you hurry up? I want ice cream-"

Yeonjun halted mid-sentence when he noticed why you had stopped walking. He walked back to stand next to you and followed your gaze.

Your eyes were glued to the black satin dress hugging the body of a mannequin behind the window of the boutique. It was long and had a split mid-thigh. There was no doubt about it, the dress was gorgeous, magical almost.

Yeonjun eyed the way you looked at the dress with admiration in your doe eyes.

"Do you like it?"

"Yeonjun, it's literally the most beautiful dress I've ever laid my eyes on."

Your best friend smiled surprised at your lovesick expression. He had never seen you this mesmerized by a piece of clothing. You must have really liked it.

"You should try it on! Let's go inside."

You tore your eyes from the dress to look at Yeonjun with an unsure expression on your face. "You think so? I'm not sure it would look good on my body. I mean the mannequin is so much thin-"

"Hush," Yeonjun interrupted you with furrowed eyebrows. "No one would rock this dress better than you. Let's go try it on."

A warm feeling bubbled up in your heart and you scrunched your nose as you looked at Yeonjun with a smile on your face. Your best friend could be sweet sometimes.

Yeonjun felt his eyes soften at the sight before grabbing your hand. "Come on."

"Wait." You pulled him back, keeping your hand in his, and looked for the price tag.

"I don't know what the dress costs yet-" your sentence got interrupted by the laugh escaping your mouth when you saw the small price tag.

Yeonjun let out a confused noise at your sudden outburst.

"Yeah, no, forget this ever happened. Let's get ice cream, Jun," you chuckled and pulled him with you, away from the boutique.

"What, why?" He stopped you and looked at the price tag before wincing, realizing how much money this was for you.

But you liked the dress so much...

"Aw, come on, Y/n. I've never seen you this stunned by a dress. Just try it on, maybe it's worth the money-"

You smiled but Yeonjun knew it wasn't genuine.

"No, it's okay, Jun. I can live without that dress. Plus, I'm still saving money for that car for my mom, remember? I shouldn't be buying new clothes at all right now."

Yeonjun looked at you with an unsatisfied furrow in his eyebrows but you instead raised yours at him in a reassuring way, a smile on your lips.

"I promise, it's not a big deal, dude. Let's get ice cream." You tugged softly at Yeonjun's hand, making him let out a disappointed sigh.

"Alright."

The two of you started walking to the ice cream shop and you quickly began conversing about another subject, trying to mask your disappointment. But your voice faded to the background of Yeonjun's mind because the only thing he could concentrate on was the dress. You worked so hard and barely ever treated yourself the way you deserved to be treated. He hated it.

Yeonjun looked back over his shoulder to the boutique and shook his head.

You had to have that dress.

PRESENT

A smile colored your red pained lips as you thought about your best friend. Even with all the teasing and mocking, in your eyes, he would always be the kindest person in the universe. There was no one who believed in you the way he did, who appreciated you and made you feel loved the way he could.

Even your ex-boyfriend had never made you feel as beautiful as Yeonjun made you feel every single day.

You felt tears start brimming in your eyes at the overwhelming love for Yeonjun that rushed through your veins and heart. But you could not ruin your makeup after having spent thirty whole minutes on it and quickly blinked the tears away. Yeonjun would probably have laughed at you if he knew you were about to start crying over him and the thought of this immediately made the tears dry up.

You went downstairs to put on your heels and just when you were done tying the straps around your legs, the doorbell rang.

Letting out a breath, you glanced at yourself in the mirror one more time before unlocking the door.

Yeonjun looked up from his phone to greet you, but the moment his eyes fell on you, the words died in his throat and the bouquet of flowers almost fell from his hand.

He looked at you with his mouth ajar and even if he tried to, he couldn't stop himself from scanning you from head to toe, his eyes lingering on the parts of the dress that hugged your body beautifully.

You suddenly felt self-conscious and looked down at your dress. You knew it looked better on the mannequin. Of course, it wouldn't look on you the way Yeonjun imagined-

Your thoughts got interrupted when Yeonjun spoke up.

"You," he breathed, "are going to give me a heart attack one day." His voice sounded so calm and serious, it made you let out a giggle. And just like that, your nerves and insecurities left your system. Yeonjun was the only one who could do that to you; make your heart both accelerate and calm down in a span of ten seconds.

"Good evening to you, too," you grinned before taking the flowers Yeonjun handed you without taking his eyes off you. "And, thank you."

You couldn't hide the smile tugging at the corners of your lips with every word leaving your mouth.

"You will definitely give a lot of people a heart attack as well tonight, don't worry," you then stated, eyeing him as you smelled the flowers—your favorite ones.

Yeonjun looked down with a close-mouthed smile on his lips and a heart that was beating twice as fast. For some reason, he didn't care about other people. He cared about you. Your reaction. Your opinion. That was the only thing on his mind when his stylist was dolling him up. That was the only reason he asked his hairdresser to not cut his hair and keep it long instead. The way you liked it.

"You didn't cut your hair." You pointed at his hair as if having read his thoughts.

This made Yeonjun instantly look up with a hopeful glow in his eyes.

"I love it," you mumbled.

“Yeah?” He replied a tad too quickly.

Your eyes flickered from his hair to his own and you chuckled at the eagerness in his voice.

“Yeah.”

He let out a sheepish laugh, realizing he sounded a little too desperate, and quickly looked down at the Rolex on his wrist. "W-We're going to be late. Let's go."

Your eyes followed his eyes but instead of looking at the watch, you couldn't help but let your gaze linger on his veiny hand for a second or two before nodding your head. "Yeah, let's go."

The atmosphere was relaxed and warm in Yeonjun's matte, black Lexus LFA as he drove to the event. But the fiddling with your rings and constant glances in the mirror to check your makeup gave away to your best friend that you were nervous.

When you were about to adjust your lipstick once more, Yeonjun spoke up.

"Yn, you literally look perfect, stop stressing out."

You immediately sat back in the red, leather seat and let out a breath. "I'm just so not used to-" you gestured at how dolled up you looked, referring to the expensive dress in particular, "-all of this. I'm scared I'll embarrass you, dude."

Yeonjun frowned as he glanced at you.

"With the way you look right now, I promise, there's nothing in this world you could do tonight to embarrass me, love."

Your cheeks instantly heated up and you rolled your eyes at the pet name before quickly looking out of the window. "Oh, stop it."

"And you know what's funny?" He then asked, making you turn back to face Yeonjun with a raised, questioning eyebrow.

"Even if you had done nothing about your appearance and just rolled straight out of bed, I'd still show you off. You're just perfect like that," he shrugged, not taking his eyes off the road.

Staring at your best friend with an unbelieving smile on your lips, you shook your head slightly, feeling your heart pick up its pace.

"You sound like you're so down bad for me, Jun."

Yeonjun let out a small laugh that didn't reach his eyes. "If only you knew, Yn."

You blinked, and the expression on your face now turned into a skeptical frown. Why did he sound so sincere?

"Yeonjun, what do you mean-"

"We're here," Yeonjun interrupted you with a smile, acting completely oblivious to the tension he had created with his words. You shook your head, not wanting him to change the subject just yet, but before you could respond, your eyes caught a glimpse of the marvelous mansion on top of the hill, and your jaw dropped.

"No way," you breathed.

Yeonjun grinned, leaning back against the leather headrest and turning his head to face you as you stared at the building for a few seconds in complete silence.

"What are you thinking about, hm?"

"Just wondering many times my apartment would fit in this castle." It wasn't the only thing floating through your mind but the more seconds passed, the less confident you were to ask him what he meant to say just a few seconds before. He probably didn't mean anything serious, right?

Yeonjun let out a chuckle, slightly alleviated you had seemed to forget about the words he blurted out only a few seconds ago. Only slightly, because sometimes he wished he could just drop the bomb and watch your reaction, waiting for something that could turn out in either one, a disaster or two, the kiss he had been dreaming about for ages now.

Yeonjun immediately felt his insides grow hot at the latter idea that he knew shouldn't appear in his head, and quickly took the keys out of his car. "Let's go. Inside you'll be able to decide better how many times your apartment fits in this place."

You grinned, turning to face your best friend whose wink you were able to catch just before he exited the vehicle.

With mesmerization written all over your face, you scrutinized your surroundings as you walked beside Yeonjun through the enormous front yard.

Yeonjun felt conflicted as he glanced at you. Part of him was feeling proud, being able to impress you with all of this luxury. But another part of him, the bigger part, felt spoiled. Because while your jaw was almost touching the ground at the sight of all the luxury, he was starting to get so used to these kinds of parties that this huge house that barely could be called a house but rather a castle like you named it, did not affect him much anymore. He was starting to find luxury normal, boring almost.

Was he spoiled for preferring to be taken to an unknown downtown cafe by you than going to a five-star Michelin restaurant with his team? For preferring to be at your apartment rather than this mansion that was about two hundred times as big? For preferring all the simplicity and bliss that came with being with you instead of the riches and luxury that came with his job? Had he turned into the people he used to detest? The ungrateful kind?

In a second Yeonjun was brought back to earth when he felt a warm feeling engulf his hand. He looked down at your intertwined hands and smiled softly. A sigh of relief fell from his lips, a relief only you could give him.

It was at that moment Yeonjun realized he wasn't ungrateful. He still appreciated all the things his job got him, but the reason nothing beat the simplicity of being with you, was because of you. Nothing beat being with you.

He looked up at your face, but you weren't looking at him. You were trying to get a glimpse of the inside of the building as you reached the foyer.

"Name?" The broad, black-clothed man asked, his voice firm and cold before looking up from his notepad. When his eyes fell on Yeonjun, a smile immediately appeared on his face. "Oh! Good evening, Yeonjun."

You felt pride grow in your chest at how well-known and respected your best friend was.

"Evening," Yeonjun smiled, his voice deep.

"Brought a plus-one?" The man eyed you, and you awkwardly shifted in your spot, fearing you already looked out of place.

Yeonjun tightened his hold on your hand as he looked down at you, a proud smirk tugging at the left corner of his lips. "My one and only best friend."

You smiled as you looked up at him, and when your eyes locked, you felt your heart jump.

You didn't miss the way Yeonjun's eyes flickered from yours down to your lips for a split second before he turned back to face the guard. Why did that small action make something in your belly do a flip?

"Is it OK if we pass?" Yeonjun grinned.

"Of course." The man immediately stepped aside, the tension between you and Yeonjun almost half having distracted him from doing his job.

The exterior of the mansion had already amazed you, but nothing could've prepared you for the grandiosity that was the inside of the establishment.

The illumination coming from the large chandeliers decorating the high ceiling reflected in the shiny beige, marble floor as you walked over it. Your eyes roamed over the rich-looking people talking and laughing with each other, and your grip on Yeonjun's hand unconsciously tightened, making him give you an encouraging squeeze in return.

"You're beautiful," he whispered in your ear reassuringly and you immediately felt your cheeks heat up.

In a second, you remembered the words he had said just before you arrived, and the warmth in your cheeks spread through your entire body.

"If only you knew, Y/n."

What did he imply with that comment? Was he just being playful or was he suggesting something else, something more? And why did you still hope for the latter? Why were you still not over your feelings for him after forcing yourself to forget about them for months?

You shouldn't be feeling this way. He shouldn't be making you feel this way.

You let go of your best friend's hand.

Yeonjun frowned, feeling a small pang in his chest at the cold, vacant feeling in his hand and the change in atmosphere.

He cleared his throat, recomposing himself. "Let's go." Not waiting for your answer, he started walking to the great hall of the mansion.

You swallowed as you watched him walk away before trailing after him.

"Two Boulevardiers, please," Yeonjun ordered at the bar, not liking the wines the waiters were offering the guests.

"Sounds fancy. Are the wines too cheap?" You joked, trying to lighten the tense air but to your dismay, it sounded clumsier than you hoped it would. He rolled his eyes with a small smile on his lips before handing you the glass of what was a fancier version of Negroni and you let out a small sigh of relief at the sight of his smile.

Perhaps nothing was going on. Perhaps you were just overthinking every single move right now after what he told you in the car.

You smelled the drink and squinted your eyes. "Damn, this stuff is strong, isn't it?"

"It's good," Yeonjun responded before downing the drink at once.

You looked at your friend as he sniffled and ran a hand through his hair. The way he downed the drink made you almost believe he was making an effort to get tipsy quickly (not that it would work with just one drink), and you couldn't help but slightly frown. No, telling yourself nothing was going on would be lying.

You frowned. "Wait, how are you going to drive back home?" You asked, not tasting the beverage yet.

"Calling a taxi," he responded, not looking at you.

"What about your car? You're just going to leave it here?"

"I'll ask one of my managers to get it for me."

"Oh." You slowly nodded, an embarrassed chuckle leaving your lips as you averted your eyes to the floor. You almost forgot just how rich your best friend was.

Finally, you took a sip of the drink and scrunched your face at the feeling of the alcohol burning your throat, making Yeonjun's eyes shift to you. He couldn't help but smile. You had always been bad with alcohol.

"You okay?" He asked and this made you down the entire drink before turning to face him.

"I am okay. Are you, though?"

Yeonjun swallowed, his nose and cheeks slightly red due to the alcohol, and he looked away. "Yeah, I'm fine."

You knew he realized you were hinting at the tense air between you two but he seemed to ignore it.

However, as you examined the somber glint in Yeonjun's eyes, your best friend instinct won from whatever you were feeling at that moment and you slipped your hand in his before slightly squeezing it.

"Are you really okay, Jun? Are we okay?" You asked, forcing him to look you in the eyes as you slightly tugged at his hand.

His eyes locked with yours and they immediately softened. He gave you a smile and nodded. "Yeah. Everything is okay, love."

The answer didn't free you of the unexplainable feeling pressing onto your chest but you just nodded. You didn't know what answer you were looking for, anyways.

"I hope you don't hate the party that much. I know you didn't exactly want to come," Yeonjun quickly joked and you let out a breathy chuckle.

"It's fine, I am actually quite impressed. Never seen this many good-looking people in one place."

Yeonjun let out a laugh and you couldn't help but laugh too. To your relief, the weight on your chest lost a few pounds.

"Come on, let me introduce you to some people," Yeonjun smiled and you quickly nodded before following him toward a group of well-dressed men and women surrounding a tall but small and round table.

A blond-haired woman you quickly recognized as the model Yeonjun did the Vogue shoot with —Lana—came up to Yeonjun and pulled him into an embrace. Your eyes flickered to the way his hands were positioned on her tiny waist before shifting to the smile on her face that was caused by something Yeonjun whispered in her ear.

You forced yourself to look away, swallowing whatever feeling had crept up on you at the sight— at the remembrance of the fact you were no one but a best friend to Yeonjun, one who did not belong in a place like this.

"Guys, this is Yn—my plus one for tonight." Yeonjun's voice and all the attention your way made you look up with wide eyes before you broke into an embarrassed chuckle.

"Hi, I'm Yn," you smiled clumsily, and to your relief, you received kind smiles from Yeonjun's friends.

"Hi, I am Lana!" The tall model chimed in, holding out her hand for you to shake. You smiled and took her hand but your eyes shifted to Yeonjun for a split second with a confused arch in your eyebrow only to find him catching your look with the same expression on his face.

"You already met her during the Vogue shoot, remember?" Yeonjun asked, scratching the back of his neck, something you knew he only did when he was either nervous or ashamed.

You quickly nudged your best friend's arm and painted a wide smile on your lips.

"Give her a break. She must've forgotten, it was such a busy day. Plus, I'm just one of the many people behind the camera, not very striking," you chuckled and the confused expression on Lana's face morphed into a bright one.

"Yeah, it really was such a busy day, right?" She gasped before going into detail to the people around her about just how long her schedule was that day.

Yeonjun knew you reacted to Lana this way to reassure him and that only made everything worse. He believed you were more than striking, and he hated how Lana made you feel like you were invisible to people like her—like him.

As you listened to the conversation between Lana and another woman who you just learned was called Minhee, you felt Yeonjun's hand find yours below the table and give it a small squeeze, making you look up at him.

‘I’m sorry’ was what he mouthed and you quickly shook your head, scrunching your nose and giving him a funny smile.

‘Don't worry about it, nothing deep’ you mouthed back, nudging his shoulder softly before looking straight ahead again.

He lowered his head and your heart leaped when his warm breath hit your skin as he whispered “love you” in your ear, keeping his face so neutral, people around you might as well believed he mentioned something about the weather to you.

You turned your head and your breath almost hitched in your throat at the proximity between your faces. "Love you too," you whispered, your voice almost inaudible, before you turned away from him. But not without noticing the way Yeonjun's eyes flickered to your lips for the second time tonight.

After having talked to most of Yeonjun's friends, you came to the conclusion they weren't as stuck up or out of touch with reality as you secretly expected them to be.

Particularly a guy named Lee Minho, who wasn't exactly a friend of Yeonjun but a friend of a friend.

"So how long have you been doing photography? I've seen some of your work and I do think it is very much striking,” the brown-haired man said as he leaned his elbow on the table and let his chin rest in his hand, a small smirk dancing on his lips.

You couldn't help but beam at the fact he was showing interest in your profession. You were so surprised he had seen your work that you didn't even notice the up-and-down look he gave you. Yeonjun did, though.

Just when you were going to answer him, Yeonjun beat you to it: "She's been photographing everything she finds interesting for as long as I can remember. Back when we were like ten years old, I would constantly lose her because she'd pause somewhere to take a picture of our surroundings with the camera my mom gifted her."

Both you and Minho shifted your attention to Yeonjun who looked at you with a sweet smile before glancing at Minho for a split second with the same smile on his lips but a completely different expression in his eyes.

You cleared your throat before nodding, "Y-yeah, like Yeonjun just said, I've been into photography since I was a kid. It turned from a hobby to a profession when I started majoring in photography in University."

Your eyes lingered on Yeonjun when you spoke the words before you averted your attention back to Minho.

"Thank you, by the way," you timidly smiled. "What about you, how did you get into modeling?" You then asked Minho, not missing the look the brown-haired man gave Yeonjun before he turned to you, a bright smile replacing the expression on his face.

"I was scouted actually! I never thought I had the potential to be a model until a middle-aged woman came up to me and asked me if I was interested in dropping by the modeling agency," he responded and you raised your eyebrows, mouthing a small 'wow'.

"I thought I was being scammed at first, though."

This comment earned a heartfelt laugh from you, making him chuckle too.

You felt Yeonjun's stare burn into the side of your face and when you looked up, your senses were confirmed. Your eyes met his and he instantly looked away, a vague expression of disappointment flashing through his dark eyes.

You frowned before turning back to Minho.

Why didn't Yeonjun seem glad you were getting along with the people here and were actually having a good time? Wasn't that what he wanted? God, the air between you and your best friend was so peculiar the whole evening.

After a few minutes of you chatting with Minho, you felt a nudge against your arm, making you turn to the side.

"Hey, Yn, want to dance?" Yeonjun asked, the corners of his lips twitching into an almost timid smile, and he gestured at the people slow dancing on the dance floor now that a fitting song started playing from the speakers. Your heart made a small jump and you were just about to nod your head when you remembered Minho's proposition of a minute ago.

You offered Yeonjun an apologetic smile before turning to Minho. "Minho actually just offered to give me a tour through the mansion. I'm sorry."

Although the smile stayed on his plump lips, the rest of Yeonjun's face seemed to fall, his eyes losing the excited glint in them.

His Adams Apple bobbed up and down before he nodded. "Oh, yeah, sure. Don't worry about it."

He glanced at Minho before dropping his eyes and excusing himself from you two, leaving you behind with an uneasy feeling in your chest as you watched him walk off.

"Let's go?"

Minho's voice pulled you away from your thoughts that were Yeonjun-shaped, and you cleared your throat before nodding and following Minho.

"Another Boulevardier?"

Yeonjun looked up from his hands to the man behind the bar counter before slowly shaking his head.

"A water is fine."

Drinking his pain away now would be easy, too easy. You deserved more than that. You deserved to be felt. So that was what Yeonjun was doing now.

He was letting himself feel the love he held for you, and the pain it caused him.

His gaze was focused on the glass of crystal clear water in front of him, tapping his index finger against it softly, but every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was you. Your sharp eyes that would turn big and innocent when Yeonjun stepped close to the line that separated friendship from being more. Your soft looking lips that Yeonjun dreamed to not just feel against his cheek once in a while, but against his own lips—and not just once in a while. All he could see was your bright smile and all he could hear was your heartfelt laughter.

A smile crept upon Yeonjun's face, one that did not reach his eyes. He needed you more than he ever thought he did.

A new presence beside Yeonjun made him look up.

"Hey, Soob."

"Where's Yn?" Soobin asked, coming straight to the point.

Yeonjun averted his eyes back to the glass of water. "Somewhere with Minho."

"You've got to tell her, Yeonjun."

The outer ends of Yeonjun's eyebrows drooped and he bit his lower lip. "And do what? Ruin our friendship and lose her? I'd rather die, Soobin."

Soobin sighed and ran a hand down his face. "Bro, listen to me, okay?"

Yeonjun glanced at his friend for a second, letting him know he was paying attention.

"I know I don't know Yn that well personally, but I would have to be blind to not notice the way she looks at you, I can't believe you don't see it."

Yeonjun frowned, fidgeting with the rings on his fingers. "That's how she looks at everyone."

Soobin chuckled. "We both know you're lying. You know you're the only one she looks at that way."

Yeonjun's heart sped up and he hated himself for allowing the balloon of hope to inflate in his chest.

"Do you think it could mean something?" He asked carefully.

"Yeonjun, I don't think it does, I know it does."

Yeonjun looked at Soobin with furrowed eyebrows, his mind going all places. "Should I tell her?"

"If Minho hasn't already, then yes."

Yeonjun's eyes widened and for a second he was frozen in place. Minho. With the way the man was looking at you tonight, it would be no surprise he was going to ask you out, or maybe already had.

Yeonjun could not let that happen. He could not let his last bit of hope disappear in thin air.

"I have to find her," Yeonjun breathed and almost tripped as he jumped off the bar chair. "Thanks, Soob."

Pushing through the crowd of people, Yeonjun made it to the staircase and he skipped multiple steps to save time.

With his heart beating in his throat and his breathing rapid, he ran from room to room only to find every single of them empty, not a sight of you or Minho. God, why was this mansion so unnecessarily huge?

Two girls walked past Yeonjun and he quickly recognized them from a past event.

"Hey, did any of you see Minho perhaps?"

The girls halted their steps. "Yeah, he's in the art room. The one with all the paintings and sculptures," the girl on the left replied and the other added: "It's at the end of the hall, to your right."

"Was he with a girl?"

The girls nodded and the one on the right sighed. "Yep, and I wish I was her. He seemed to be very into her."

Yeonjun's eyes widened in horror. "A-alright. Thanks." And with that, he dashed off.

When he got closer to the room, he started hearing muffled sounds of two people talking and he quickly recognized your voice.

Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes for a second or two. It was now or never, he told himself before walking to the entrance of the room.

But just when he was going to enter, his eyes fell on a sight he had often imagined in his head. The only difference was just that in his head it was him standing in front of you. It was him pulling you closer, pushing your hair out of your face, and lifting your chin. In his dreams it was him.

But in real life it was Minho.

Yeonjun's body deflated, his shoulder slumping and his face falling.

He was too late. He was too late and it was his own fault. He had wasted the seas of time he had to let you know what was living in his heart.

But just him understanding he was the one to blame wasn’t making the knife in his chest wound him any less.

Tears filled his eyes as he watched Minho slowly close the gap between you and him. Yeonjun took a few steps back before looking away, not being able to handle seeing him kiss you.

Without looking back once, he walked off, leaving you unaware of his feelings once again.

Minho softly tugged at your waist, pulling you closer to him. Your eyes roamed over everything in the room except for the man in front of you.

The rhythm of your heartbeat was unsteady and when you finally dared to look up in Minho's eyes, the unfamiliarity of them told you your heart wasn't racing in a pleasant or exciting way. You were nervous and stressed—uncomfortable.

Minho was perfect. Kind, attractive, and most importantly, into you.

But he wasn’t the person who made you feel the safest, happiest and most appreciated girl in the world. He wasn’t your best friend whom you had been in love with for over two years. He wasn’t the one for you.

He wasn’t Yeonjun.

"I-I'm sorry," you muttered and pushed yourself away from him just before he could close the space between you two entirely.

Minho instantly took a step back, his eyes averting from you, and his lips curving into an embarrassed smile.

"Sorry, I thought you-" he raked a hand through his brown, silky hair, "never mind, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uneasy-"

You raised your hands and quickly shook your head. "No! No, no, you didn't do anything against my will. It's just that…”" You halted and looked away from Minho, the floor suddenly becoming the most fascinating thing to examine.

"It's just that...?"

You understood that Minho deserved an answer and thus you collected all the courage inside of you and turned your head to face him.

"I think I am already in love with someone else. And although I tried to deny my feelings and refuse any possibility of them existing, it's not fair to him or you or anyone else to pretend like I'm ready to move on when I'm not."

Surprisingly, a small weight lifted itself from your shoulders the moment you admitted out loud that you were in love—in love with your best friend. You were tired of lying to yourself and everyone around you. But most importantly you were tired of lying to Yeonjun.

And just like that, you knew you had to tell Yeonjun what you truly felt for him.

Minho slowly nodded. "It's Choi, isn't it?"

Your widened eyes answered Minho's question and a disappointed chuckle escaped his lips.

"And I hoped I was wrong when I sensed something between you two just half an hour ago," he smiled and you returned the gesture, an apology painting the outlines of your lips.

"I'm sorry," you repeated and he shook his head.

"Don't be sorry, we don't choose whom we fall in love with, do we?" He reassured you and you let out a shaky laugh.

"We don't."

Minho gave you a kind smile before gesturing at the door. "Well, I guess you better go and find him then?"

You blinked a few times before slowly nodding. "Thank you, Minho."

Although part of you felt bad for leaving Minho like this, the larger part of you couldn't wait to finally open your heart for Yeonjun and confess to him all that was inside of it. You were finally ready.

The heels you were wearing were making it difficult for you to rush your way down the stairs, but after almost tripping twice, the ground level was finally back beneath your feet.

Squinting your eyes, you tried to make out your best friend in the crowd of people. Usually, you were able to find him relatively quickly because of his height, but this was an event a lot of models attended, which meant he wasn't the only tall person anymore.

You were about to grab your phone from your purse when a familiar face caught your eyes, making them light up as if they had just witnessed a fallen star. Yeonjun was making his way to the balcony it seemed.

You pushed through the crowd, mumbling clumsy excuse me's and I'm sorry's to get to your best friend. But the moment you were getting closer, you noticed he was holding two drinks in his hands.

You frowned in puzzlement. Was he looking for you or...?

You halted in your steps.

He wasn't alone on the balcony. And the drink was surely not for you.

Lana took the drink from his hand with a seductive smile on her lips and took a sip of it without breaking eye contact with Yeonjun.

With wide eyes, you watched the way Lana took Yeonjun's drink and placed both glasses on the table beside them before positioning her hands on his chest. Yeonjun's eyes flickered from her eyes to her lips, and when he took a step closer to her and she whispered something in his ear, you felt nausea bubble up inside of you. Please, don't.

Unfortunately, he could not hear your silent prayers, and the next second, he had her pressed up against the wall with his lips on hers.

You didn't even notice you were holding your breath until you were running out of oxygen and a staggering exhale escaped your red-painted lips.

Taking a shaky step back, you shook your head in disbelief before forcing yourself to turn around.

You bit your trembling lower lip and desperately tried blinking away the tears pooling in your eyes. You could not be seen crying at this event.

You tried to make your way to the exit but a voice calling out your name caused you to halt in your steps.

After quickly wiping your eyes, you spun on your heels and landed face to face with Soobin, whom you knew was Yeonjun's close friend.

"Soobin, hi!" Your attempt to sound cheerful was pathetic, to say the least.

"Hey, Yeonjun was looking for you- is everything okay?" He frowned worriedly when he noticed your glossy eyes.

A strangled noise escaped your throat at the mention of Yeonjun looking for you before you hastily nodded. "Yeah, no, I'm fine. What do you mean Yeonjun was looking for me?"

"Yeah, he wanted to talk to you about-" Soobin quickly cut himself off, remembering Yeonjun should be the one to tell you.

"About what?" You questioned, the corners of your lips being pulled downwards as you fought the lump in your throat.

Soobin shook his head. "Y-you should go to him. I think it's important."

This time it was your turn to shake your head. "I don't think whatever he wanted to talk to me about was that important."

The black-haired man in front of you furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What? Why?"

You looked to the side before nodding at the sight of Yeonjun and Lana on the balcony. "Because he's busy."

Soobin followed your stare and when he saw what you were talking about, his jaw fell open and almost reached the floor.

"What the hell," he whispered to himself in disbelief.

"Hey, I am going to call a taxi to go home, okay? I'm not feeling all too well. Can you let Yeonjun know?" You asked Soobin as you took a step back.

"Yn, wait, I think Yeonjun doesn't want you to leave without him. You know he always needs to know you're home safe before he can relax."

It was true. Yeonjun was the most protective person you knew, especially over you. And you hated the way your heart warmed at the recollection of that.

"I don't want to... bother him right now. It's alright, he won't know I'm gone until I'm home, probably. Good night, Soob," you answered with a kind smile that didn't reach your eyes, and Soobin's shoulders slumped in defeat. He couldn't believe what was happening.

Just before you started making your way to the exit, you turned around once again. "Oh, and can you tell Yeonjun I had a good night? And that I hope he does too?"

Just because your heart was shattered in pieces because of him didn't mean he didn't still deserve to have a good night. His happiness would always matter most to you.

Soobin's eyes softened and he let out a sigh. "I will. Good night, Yn."

You tightened the leather coat around your body as the chilly night breeze hit your bare legs. Grabbing your phone from your purse, you checked the time again. Where was that cab?

Just as you were storing the device back in the black handbag, an all too familiar voice made you freeze.

Gradually you turned around and you were met with a breathless Yeonjun making his way to you, his hair slightly tousled and cheeks flushed. Any other day you'd find he looked endearing with messy hair and rosy cheeks. But right now, the state he was in was making you nauseous because you knew the reason behind it.

"Yn, what the hell, why did you suddenly leave without saying anything?" He panted, looking into your eyes with a worried and confused expression in them. "I thought we were going to hang out at your place after the event."

The expression in your eyes, on the other hand, was unreadable to him.

"I am just not really feeling well and I didn't want to bother you because you were having a good time. I told Soobin," you explained without looking at him once.

He huffed. "A good time?" If only you knew how terrible of a time he had after finding you with Minho.

The confused arch in your eyebrows at his remark made him shake his head as if to wipe away the comment before he continued talking. "You should've texted me. I don't want you taking cabs alone at night. Just tell me what's wrong, please."

You sighed. Could he stop being a gentleman for once and not make things harder for you?

"God, there's nothing wrong. Plus, I am a grown woman. I'll survive," you muttered, feeling a ball of frustration start growing inside of you. With him, with yourself—with everything.

"Come on, Yn, at least be brave enough to look me in the eyes when you're lying to me. Why did you leave?"

Sometimes you wished he couldn't read you so effortlessly. But after having been best friends for fifteen years, that was an impossible wish to fulfill. Because after all these years spent together, you were as transparent as glass to him.

Yeonjun knew you better than anyone else. From what your favorite animal was to what events in your childhood led you to become the individual you were today.

Yeonjun knew you through and through.

Except, when it came to your feelings for him. To that, he was completely and utterly blind. Or maybe, just too insecure—not confident enough to consider that maybe, just maybe, you held the exact same feelings he held for you.

You sighed in annoyance and tightened the grip on your purse.

A presumption seemed to flash through Yeonjun's mind because suddenly it was as if something in his eyes shifted and his chest heaved.

"Yn, did Minho do anything to you? Because if he did-"

Your head jerked up, a horrified expression covering your face. "Oh my God, no! No, not at all."

Yeonjun's nostrils flared and his eyes were wild as he raked a hand through his hair. "Yn, I swear-"

You seized his other hand and pulled it to obtain his attention. "Yeonjun, he didn't do anything. I promise. Now calm the hell down."

With stern eyes, you held contact with his dark ones and slowly they seemed to soften. Your best friend finally appeared to believe your words and the veins in his neck relaxed as he released a ragged breath that held a sense of relief.

"Okay, good." He nodded his head a few times as if trying to calm himself down from the thought that had his insides burning with fury. "Good."

You nodded too and a short silence fell over the two of you before it got interrupted by the sound of an engine.

"There's the cab. I'll see you later, okay?" You muttered before turning around to make your way to the vehicle.

"I'm coming with you."

"Oh my God, Yeonjun, I told you, you don't have to-"

"Just get in the car, Yn," he replied and the sternness that engulfed his usual soft voice made you bite back a response and instead enter the car in silence with Yeonjun following you.

The silence in the taxi was thick and the tension was nearly suffocating.

Glancing at Yeonjun, you found him looking out of the window with furrowed eyebrows and a clenched jaw.

You didn't blame him for being angry with you. You were acting irrationally and unfairly—punishing someone for breaking your heart when they weren't even aware of doing so in the first place wasn’t reasonable, you knew that. But still, you couldn't find the strength to pull yourself together and apologize to Yeonjun. And suddenly, telling him the truth seemed like the scariest thing you could do now after seeing him all over Lana.

Nausea bubbled up in your stomach once again at the memory. Your Yeonjun, kissing another woman.

Your Yeonjun who was free to date whoever he wanted. Your Yeonjun who didn't owe you anything because you had never found the courage, to be honest with him.

Your Yeonjun, who wasn't yours.

You turned to look out of the window, trying to scoot as close to the car door as possible. Away from him.

Now it was Yeonjun's turn to peek at you and when he saw your smaller figure in the corner of the car, he suddenly had to fight back the tears burning his eyes.

Touching his lips with his fingers, he felt sick with himself. Sick and guilty at the memory of kissing a woman that wasn't you. A woman he felt nothing for.

Why did it feel like he betrayed you?

He wasn't yours and you weren't his, and still, he felt ashamed. Ashamed because instead of mourning the fact he would never get the opportunity to call you his lover, he let his weakness win and went to find himself a distraction to try and forget about you when you were worth so much more than being forgotten—even for one evening.

His gaze slowly wandered over your frame and he had to bite the inside of his lower lip to stop it from trembling as the tears threatened to fall from his pained eyes.

God, why weren't you his? What was wrong with him for you to not be able to love him as anything more than a friend?

Yeonjun finally tore his eyes off you and quickly wiped away the one tear that managed to escape as subtly as possible.

But you noticed. Of course, you did.

And you suddenly felt extremely sick with yourself. You were putting Yeonjun through something he didn't deserve.

With sad eyes, you looked up at Yeonjun and when you noticed the glossy layer on his eyes, your heart dropped like the flowers from a broken lover's hands.

You had to tell him the truth.

After what felt like an eternity, the cab arrived at your place.

You nervously smoothened your dress. "Won't your management mind you left without any security?" You were aware you were procrastinating telling him the real issue.

Your best friend's shoulders tensed up for a second at the sound of your voice before he shrugged them. "It's not the first time."

You nodded. That was true.

Yeonjun luckily was permitted to go out without bodyguards or any other type of security on regular days, but when it came to events that were known to the general public such as this one, he would usually be accompanied by at least one escort.

But Yeonjun was like a rebellious teenager sometimes—running from his own security so he could flee an event early and make his way to your apartment.

"I'm sorry you..." you cleared your throat, "…had to leave earlier because of me." You were truly sorry. Because although you didn't ask him to do so, you knew Yeonjun would never let you go on your own. So when you decided to leave the event, you were aware of the possibility Yeonjun would find out and leave too. You just hadn't cared. But now as you look at your best friend, the disappointed glint in his eyes and the defeated arch in his eyebrows, you felt guilty. He technically had done nothing wrong, and you ruined his night.

"I'm really sorry," you repeated, your voice barely above a vulnerable whisper.

He nodded and you took a deep breath, collecting every inch of courage in your body. This was it. All the months you dreamt about him, hoped to one day be more than just friends, wished you could call him yours. All the secrets. You were going to confess them to him now.

"Yn?"

Your words died before leaving your mouth.

He looked up at you after calling your name and your heart skipped a beat when his dark, familiar eyes bored into yours.

"Are we... Are we okay?"

You blinked a few times and you had to fight the wave of tears that was about to break the dam behind your eyes. No, I am not okay and I was just going to tell you why, you thought.

With your lips parted and eyes widened, you stared at him.

Uncountable emotions fled through your body in that one moment looking at Yeonjun.

But there was one that stood out the most, one that you had always felt for your best friend, even before you grew to have romantic feelings for him: love.

Unconditional and genuine love.

Pieces of core memories you shared with him flashed in front of your eyes for a split second, and you remembered once again just how much he meant to you. How much his happiness mattered to you.

And if Lana was the one making him happy now, you did not want to come in between that.

Hiding your feelings for Yeonjun for so many months but suddenly dumping them on him the day he kissed someone else was not fair to both Yeonjun or Lana.

Slowly your face softened and a small but sincere smile colored your lips.

"We will always be okay, Jun. Whatever happens."

He was your best friend, and you'd rather die than live a life without him in it.

Yeonjun released a breath he didn't know he was holding until you answered.

A weak smile gradually grew on Yeonjun's face before he nodded his head. You were right. Whatever happened, it would always be you and him. Even if it broke his heart to know it would just be as best friends.

"Yn, wait."

You raised a questioning eyebrow.

"You were going to tell me something just a second ago, weren't you? I feel like I interrupted you," he asked frowning.

You swallowed, almost amazed at how well he could read you, before sighing and shaking your head. "No, I wasn't saying anything. It probably just seemed like it."

He slightly narrowed his eyes and tilted his head. "Are... Are you sure?" He leaned in and took your hand in his, making your breath hitch in your throat.

"You can tell me anything, remember?" He gave you a gentle smile as if to remind you it was your best friend you were talking to. The person you had known since you were only eight years old.

And you were so close. So close to spilling all your secrets to him.

Just not close enough.

Smiling, you squeezed his hand before letting go of it. "I just got a little anxious at the event. I'm sorry I acted off to you because of it. You didn't do anything wrong." 

Yeonjun's shoulders sagged but it seemed to be out of defeat rather than relief, and the sight of it made you wonder how convincing you sounded.

"I think I should go now, the driver must be tired of waiting for us."

The driver isn’t the only one then, Yeonjun thought.

"Let's watch Friends another time okay?"

Yeonjun nodded, his face deprived of emotion.

"I owe you!" You tried to sound cheerful before closing the car door and making your way to the entrance of your apartment complex.

With the sight of Yeonjun's defeated eyes engraved in your mind, you walked away from him. The bigger the distance grew between you and the car, the more you started falling apart, and you wondered if Yeonjun could tell.

Usually, when people bid each other goodnight, they would go to bed, close their eyes and fall asleep.

But it was now two in the morning and you, on the other hand, were wide awake, sitting on the couch in your living room with a cup of tea in your hand, hoping sleep would take over you soon.

After getting home, you had changed into your pajamas which consisted of a fitting long sleeve shirt and sweats, the usual clothes you'd wear whenever you would hang out with Yeonjun. When that thought had appeared in your mind as you were putting the shirt on, you almost wanted to throw it back into your closet and dress into a different top.

But you fought the feeling. You were not going to push away your best friend or the idea of him just because he happened to break your heart with every word or glance he offered you. It wasn't his fault he had the power to do so. It wasn't his fault he was so perfectly what you wanted in a lover that it made you want to scream into a pillow or cry yourself to sleep because he wasn't the one beside you, cuddling you.

It wasn't his fault.

Sighing, you slouched back into the couch and stared at the heels in the corridor you hadn't bothered putting back on the shelf.

Your eyes averted to the door and to your dismay pieces of memories began passing by in your mind.

When Yeonjun had showed up at seven in the morning on a Sunday because a new part of your favorite movie had gotten announced while you were still asleep. When the two of you stumbled in, weak from laughter and the two (or three) glasses of wine you had on a night out at your favorite restaurant. When Yeonjun left his job mid-photoshoot because you had accidentally locked yourself out at ten in the morning after a run and he was the only one who had spare keys to your apartment. When he showed up at three in the morning to hold you tight because you had found out your ex-boyfriend was cheating on you.

You softly smiled. That door held an overflowing amount of memories.

You were so deep in thought, that the loud buzz sounding through your apartment caused you to jump up from the couch and the inner corners of your eyebrows to pull together in suspicion.

"Yn? It's me. I know you're not sleeping yet."

The familiarity of the voice that belonged to none other than Choi Yeonjun made you release a relieved sigh and your shoulders relax for a second until a new balloon of anxiety grew in your chest. What was he doing here?

Taking a deep breath, you braced yourself for whatever feelings would strike you the moment you'd see him again before you finally made your way through the corridor to the door.   

When you opened the door, your heart instantly weakened. Yeonjun stood in the dim hall of the apartment complex with tousled hair, grey sweats, a black hoodie, and his favorite (now beat up) black Converse All-Stars.

His shoulders sagged in relief at the sight of your wide-awake state. Although he had known you weren't sleeping by the fact his texts were being delivered to your phone which wouldn't have been possible if you were sleeping since you never forgot to put your phone on airplane mode the moment you'd close your eyes, he was still relieved you opened the door.

You glanced at the clock on the wall beside the door before shifting your gaze back to Yeonjun.

"A little early for a morning run, isn't it?"

The smile on your lips was deprived of authenticity and it didn't reach your eyes as your words interrupted the quiet night atmosphere.

Yeonjun's stare was intense as he watched you and you physically felt the air between you thicken.

"Yn, I need you to be honest with me."

He decided to come straight to the point.

Your shoulders slumped because you knew you needed to. You knew you needed to be honest with him. You just couldn't.

"I-" he swallowed and raked a hand through his raven hair as he looked around, searching for the right words, "there is something up between us and I know you were going to tell me about it back in the cab. We both know you acting this way and the air between us this entire night was much more than you just feeling a little unwell."

He knew you so terribly well.

Guilt was eating you up but unfortunately for Yeonjun, anxiety was fighting it. And the latter was winning.

"It is nothing, Yeonjun, really. You shouldn't have come all the way here. Why didn't you text me-"

"I did text you! Can you just stop lying to me and tell me what the hell is up with you because I've known you for longer than a day and I know some-"

Yeonjun's raised voice faded to the background as memories of Lana's hands and lips on him reappeared in your mind and suddenly it was like a frustrated balloon of anger popped in your chest, blowing away all the other emotions swimming through your body. Emotions such as guilt, heartbreak, and shame. All of them were silent for just a second. And that second was enough for you to let your guard down. Enough for you to break down and fall apart, right in front of him. So with a raised voice and an open heart you ultimately confessed.

"Yeonjun, don't you see? I'm in love with you!"

The man in front of you froze in place, halting his sentence. With wide eyes he watched you continue your outburst of a confession.

"I've been in love with you for too long now and I am so incredibly embarrassed because I know you are my best friend, and I hate myself for not being able to view you as just that," you sniffed and ran a shaky hand through your hair, "I hate myself for feeling sick and angry and hopeless about you having something with Lana. I hate you for being so lovable, for making me fall in love with you without reciprocating my feelings. But you know what I hate most of all?" You let out a humorless chuckle and shook your head. "What I hate most of all is that I can never hate you at all."

Yeonjun listened to your sentences carefully, and every word that entered his ears made his heartbeat pick up its pace. The shocked frown on his lips was slowly but surely being replaced by a small, emotional smile as the realization started to hit him. You loved him. You loved him the way he loved you.

You were just as much his as he was yours.

Frustratedly, you frowned and a tear made its way out of your eye and down your flushed cheek.

"Come on. Say something, Yeonjun," you muttered, shame lacing your hoarse voice.

And Yeonjun responded. Just not in the way you expected him to. Not with words.

He took a step in your direction and his hands delicately cupped your warm cheeks before he closed his eyes and captured your lips with his plush ones.

Your eyes grew in size for a second but quickly fluttered shut when his thumb softly started tracing circles on your cheek. And in that moment, time seemed to stop. Everything and everyone in the world seemed to stop, leaving just you and him on this earth.

Just you and Yeonjun.

Your hands hovered above his, not daring to touch them or the man in general because of a fear this dream would stop the moment you'd do.

After a handful of seconds, he slowly pulled away but stayed close enough for your breaths to morph into one and his hands to remain on your cheeks. Your eyes gradually moved from his lips to his own dark eyes, and your noticed his dilated pupils as he stared at you with a nervous furrow in his eyebrows. His eyes were so full of intensity and emotion, it made your knees weaken.

Now that he had given you a piece of him, you weren't sure you were ever going to be able to let go of it, of him. You needed him, more than anything.

Cupping his face, you brought it closer to yours once again and this time it was you who locked your lips together.

You quickly realized this kiss was different than the first. The first was careful, fragile. This one was full of passion and fervor as if the both of you were terrified you would wake up any second, and the moment would have been nothing but a dream. A dream the two of you had had many of before.

He kissed you with all the longing and aches he had been feeling for the past two years. Uncountable days he had had to drown himself in distractions so he wouldn't feel the lack of your presence. Even when you were there with him, he had feared that it would never be enough, that he would never get over his romantic love for you and he would never be able to get rid of the empty hole in his heart you weren't filling.

Now, he was kissing you at two in the morning, with every inch of love and passion in his body. And it was better than he had ever imagined.

You stepped back and Yeonjun followed after you into the hallway of your apartment, closing the door with his foot without taking his lips off you even for a second. His lips were so beyond soft and gentle against your own, it made your heart double in size and all the worries in your body and mind evaporate in thin air.

"I am so, so in love with you, Yeonjun," you whispered against his mouth, and Yeonjun wondered if you realized the impact such words had on him. He wondered if you knew it caused tears to pool in his eyes and his knees to weaken.

You had been his best friend for as long as he could remember. And he knew you would always be his best friend. But from now on he was also allowed to call you his lover. And he couldn't believe the universe had given him this irreplaceable gift.

He pulled away and smiled from ear to ear at you as he gently pushed a strand of hair behind your ear before whispering:

"I'm completely and entirely yours, Yn."

A/N: Hi, my loves! Finally, I am posting again :’) From the bottom of my heart I’m so sorry for having been so inactive the past month. I hope now that I’ve finished this fic, I got out of my writing slump and will be able to write more again. I hope you guys enjoyed Heartbreak On The Dance Floor, thank you so much for reading! Please let me know your opinions🤍 ps. big thank you to @sungbeam for having supported me the past months and for getting me through writing this fic, love you <3

♡ reblogging from my shadow-reader days ♡

𝐟𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞

spiderman!kim sunwoo x reader (slight eric x reader)

6.7k words, spiderman across the spiderverse au, superhero au, est. relationship au, swearing, spoilers for the atsv movie! but some details of the plot are tweaked to fit my narrative (you'll see that i basically took one of the iconic scenes and put it in writing lol), mentions of death, mild violence, low-key not a full plot..?, kissing, slight angst, BARELY PROOFREAD IT'S LATE I'M SORRY

a/n: apologies in advance for shit poor storytelling in this one 😭 i just wanted to get this idea down and out before i chickened out TT

His name was Kim Sunwoo, and you happened to know his story pretty well. After all, he was Brooklyn's one and only Spiderman.

"AHHH HOLY SHIT—"

You pulled your phone away from your ear with practiced grace as Sunwoo screeched through the speaker. The words from your textbook blurred as your focus drifted completely away from your assignment.

"BABY, I ALMOST GOT HIT BY A BUS."

"Again?" You teased, flipping the page backward to restart your reading. There was no way you were going to be able to get anything done while on call with your boyfriend, especially while he was actively swinging across New York traffic.

You heard his huff over the long blast of a car horn. "Hey! It wasn't even my fault this time; that guy definitely had headphones in, which is totally illegal."

Snickering, you leaned back in your desk chair and peered out the window of your apartment's bedroom at the city beyond. He would probably be here any minute now. "You should go arrest him then. Aren't you Mister Superhero now?"

"Mister Multiversal Superhero," he corrected with a tone that definitely sounded like he had the biggest grin on his face.

You rolled your eyes good naturedly. "Uh-huh. So is Mister Multiversal Superhero almost here or do I have to find another superhero to come rescue me?"

Just as you said this, your eyes spotted a blur of black and red swinging himself around the apartment building at the end of your block. He was steadily making his way to you, as you knew he had been.

"Woah, wait, have you been seeing other superheroes?"

You rested your cheek against your fist as you watched him get closer and closer. "Well, now that we know that there are multiple universes out there, who knows?"

Spiderman landed quietly on the metal railing of your fire escape, hands braced between his legs in the iconic pose. His suit was black and tight to his skin, leaving close to nothing to the imagination and allowing for easy movement. The ensemble was completed by a red spider symbol drawn over his chest, and a black hoodie thrown over the uniform.

Sunwoo gazed at you from behind the white lenses of his mask on the other side of your window. His heart never failed to literally fly out of his body when he saw you look at him like that. "Ma'am, I'm going to need you to open this window up," he coughed in his forced deep voice, even though he knew that you knew exactly who he was. It was all for fun and to see you smile anyway.

You put your mouth near the speaker of your phone. "It's open, tiger."

Oh, dear heavens…

He could have fainted off the fire escape then, backflipped through the air, and landed kur-splat on the Brooklyn sidewalk while still maintaining the hearts in his eyes. He ended the call feeding through his mask's wireless control, before going through the familiar motions of wiggling the locking mechanism, hauling the window up, and slipping inside your bedroom. He was hit with the smell of your soap and your laundry detergent, and took in a lungful of it. This was what home smelled like. It was simple, yet quaint and soft and nothing like the busy, dangerous world outside.

You stood from your desk chair and walked into his embrace as he shot his web shooters at the window shutter strings and yanked your shutters down and closed. "Show off," you mused, wrapping one arm around his shoulders and using the other to gently pull the mask up and off his lower face.

"Only for you." His pouty lips smiled, and his arms came around your form. "Hi baby."

"Hi tiger." You grazed your thumb over his lips. "Everything okay today?"

"Mhm," he hummed, rubbing his lips together. "You're not gonna take the rest of the mask off?" He chuckled.

"I kind of like you like this."

"I knew it; is this what you use me for? You only love me for my—mmmh!" You shut him up as you yanked him over to you and drew his mouth to yours in a proper greeting kiss. He melted into you with a soft moan, hands cradling you at your waist and lower back as your fronts melded together.

When you both pulled back, Sunwoo took the opportunity to tear his mask off and shove the garment into the pocket of his jacket. The two of you shared a grin.

"So, I hear you're in need of rescu—"

BONK!

You and Sunwoo froze at the sound of the metal railing outside your window rattling, followed by a swear and a familiar-sounding voice hissing, "Ow!"

Sunwoo's smile slipped into an annoyed frown as he yanked the shutter string to send the shutter flying upward. The motion revealed a young man perched where Sunwoo had been just a couple of minutes ago, except in less of the classic Spiderman pose, and more of a one-foot-balance-act situation. The newcomer wore a costume in dark red and black, but a larger percentage of red than Sunwoo's red spider. He rubbed his forehead furiously from where Sunwoo guessed he had hit his head on the fire escape for the apartment above yours.

The thought made him break his irritated expression and laugh. "Changmin hyung, do you just suck at aiming or something?"

The scarlet spider's white eyes narrowed slightly, and he simply held the place where his head hurt. "Hey, you try swinging around in an alternate New York City! Your universe is similar enough to mine, but I feel like everything's been moved, like, an inch to the left. Absolutely ridiculous."

You smiled in amusement, too, taking a step back to settle down in your desk chair again while Sunwoo leaned against the wall next to the window and poked his head out. "Welcome to Earth 412, I guess," you chuckled.

The alternate Spider man made a little waving motion with his hand. "Yeah, thanks, Yn. You know, it's so weird being back here."

"Why are you back?" Sunwoo asked. "As much as I enjoy you cockblocking me—" He hissed as you delivered a swift kick to his shin, "—yah! Okay, okay, I'm sorry!—Sangyeon hyung only said to use the watches when called for." He gestured to the sleek, black watch wrapped around his left wrist. It was a way to communicate between universes, as well as perform a variety of different tasks, one of them being traveling from universe to universe, as well.

Changmin, the spider of Earth 115, sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Well, I actually came to warn you."

Sunwoo tensed. "Huh?"

"Sangyeon's going to call you in soon."

"Oh, okay. I don't exactly see why you would need to warn me about that."

Changmin shook his head. "No, you don't—I can't… really tell you. Not here." His eyes flickered over to you, who sat listening intently. You and Sunwoo exchanged glances, and then Sunwoo looked back to his friend.

"Don't be held up on my account," you piped up in an attempt to lighten the mood. You stood and planted a kiss on Sunwoo's cheek. "Go do what you boys need to do."

Sunwoo smiled at you, grabbing your hand to give it a squeeze, before donning his mask once more. "I'll be back for dinner," he called back to you as he slipped out onto the fire escape with Changmin.

Your laugh rang in his ears as he swung away. "I'll hold you to it!"

Sunwoo grabbed onto the fire escape above yours to give him a swinging start, fingers triggering the firing mechanism of his web shooters as he defied gravity. With a WAHOO!, he slipped through the New York City skies, Changmin following closely after him. There was a place Sunwoo had in mind where the two of them could speak in private, without worry of anyone else eavesdropping or seeing them.

Behind the massive billboard face of Nike's most recent Air Jordans release, the two spider people landed near silent onto the cement rooftop. Sunwoo hopped up onto the railing behind the billboard, holding his arms as he walked across the beam with no problems. Changmin climbed up next to him, leaning against the end pole.

"So what's this all about?" Sunwoo asked above the cacophony of New York below.

Changmin crossed his arms. "You know when we recruited you?"

He stopped, turning to face his friend. "Yeah, what about it?" Sunwoo had been recruited to Sangyeon's team of multiversal spider people several months ago, when a particle collider in his universe threatened to dismantle the entirety of space and time as you knew it. When Sunwoo had stopped the collider from being restarted the first time, the resulting test had brought a handful of multiversal spiders crashing into Earth 412. It had been a mind blowing experience to learn about the multiverse, and that, for once, he wasn't actually alone.

He finally met people who understood him. He didn't have to carry the weight of this all by himself.

"We didn't tell you everything." There was a tension in his friend's shoulders and posture as he said this.

Sunwoo eyed him with trepidation and let out a nervous laugh. "What—what does that even mean?"

A tingling sensation erupted in Sunwoo's head, and both he and Changmin's focus whipped over toward the rooftop below where a large orange portal appeared. It felt as if it had torn a hole through the air, shoving its vacuum-like opening through the world. Sunwoo's heart leapt into his throat; it looked like he was about to find out from the man himself.

He briefly heard Changmin's curse disappear in the wind, and the two spiders leapt off the beams to meet the others coming through the portal to greet them.

Through the portal came one other, a Spiderman dressed in dark crimson and gold, a gold colored slab of lightweight metal attached to his back where four robotic metal legs would emerge when summoned. His helmet retracted, folding inwards on itself like that of a gradient—nano technology, as the wearer, Chanhee of Earth 426, had explained to Sunwoo when they first met.

"Did you tell him?" Chanhee asked Changmin.

The scarlet spider gave a brief shake of his head. "Nope," he said. Sunwoo could hear the disappointment in his tone.

"Told you coming earlier would've been better," Chanhee replied, inclining his head as he turned back to step into the portal, a silent beckon for them to follow.

Sunwoo exchanged glances with Changmin. "It's nice to see you too, hyung," Sunwoo teased.

Chanhee sent a look back to Sunwoo just before he stepped fully into the vortex portal. "You won't be saying that pretty soon."

He didn't have time to question any of this interaction, absolutely none. His brain ran wild with possibilities as he followed Changmin and Chanhee back to Earth 114. There was a sinking feeling in his gut… something he didn't even need his spider sense to tell him. Maybe he should have told you he wouldn't make it back for dinner after all.

The New York of Earth 114 was home to the headquarters of the multiversal spiders called the Spider Society. It didn't matter how many times Sunwoo saw it with his own eyes, he could never take the awe out of his mouth. His lips parted in wonder as he passed by criss crossing pathways slicing to his left, right, and above and below him. Spider-beings passed by him in masses, all ranging in different varieties from their own diverse universes.

His friends walked ahead of him whilst making quiet conversation with one another, though it seemed like a hushed argument. That was why he refrained from butting in; something made him stay out of it. He didn't know why he feared what came ahead. For once, it wasn't his head saying it; it was his gut.

The scarlet and iron spider were leading him deeper into headquarters to where the shadows ran darker and the machinery ran faster. They passed by Chanhee's usual workstation where he manned the Go Home Machine, the device that scanned a being's target DNA and sent them back from where they came. Usually it was meant for Anomalies, beings that managed to crawl through the cracks between universes and ended up in one that would not be able to sustain them. Usually.

Instead of Chanhee manning the helm, however, there were a couple other spiders Sunwoo didn't recognize trying to labor over it and watch the machine do its thing. Maybe they were his protégés?

"Hey! You guys aren't teenagers; keep an eye on it, would you?" Chanhee barked at the spiders there, who immediately jolted into action.

Chanhee shook his head with an aggravated sigh. "This is what happens when people can't do what they're supposed to." He sent Changmin a pointed look, to which the latter pointedly ignored.

Sunwoo raised a hand in greeting as a few of his other friends passed by. "Hey guys!"

"Sup man," Kevin, Earth 223's resident Spider, exclaimed back in a wave. He, Juyeon, and Haknyeon all seemed to be headed out somewhere together, most likely on an assignment of their own. There were a couple others who Sunwoo had yet to see just yet, but he had a feeling that was about to be remedied.

They passed all the way into the inner lair, a large tunnel space that opened up into a taller tower-like area, housing a floating platform that acted as an office space of sorts. Navy blue light shone through the skylight at the very top of the tower, washing all of the specimens below it in that cool toned filter.

"—just a kid, Sangyeon."

"I've already made up my mind. Don't fight me on this, Jacob. He's already here."

Sunwoo swallowed at the sound of the distinct voices; he had a sneaking suspicion that the he Sangyeon and Jacob were referring to was him. He fidgeted with the watch on his wrist, trying desperately to calm his palpitating heart.

Changmin and Chanhee led him to the edge of the dark tunnel to peer up into the blue tower office. "We brought him," Chanhee said, his voice echoing against the tower walls.

The raised platform began to slowly make its descent, and Sunwoo gradually saw the spiders located onboard. There was Jacob of Earth 530 with his black uniform and pale yellow accents; and then there was Sangyeon of Earth 114, this Earth, with his broad shoulders fitted in a blue and red costume, a spider on the back that looked closer to fangs rather than the insect itself. Sangyeon was different from most of the spiders here—he was self-made, in the way that he had to continually inject himself with this red shit that made Sunwoo squirm in order to retain his powers… at least, that was what Changmin told him.

When the platform had lowered enough to fully view Sangyeon and Jacob but not enough for it to reach the ground, the two executives turned to face their guests.

"Hi hyungs," Sunwoo greeted, attempting to force the nerves out of his voice.

Jacob shot him a sunshine-like smile. "Hello Sunwoo. Nice to see you." He jabbed Sangyeon in the side with his elbow, urging the eldest to make his greeting.

Sangyeon's stony expression did not change. "Do you know why you're here?"

Jacob made an exasperated face, but said nothing else.

Sunwoo swallowed. "No sir. I'm guessing it's not for tteokbokki."

From beside him, he heard Chanhee snort and had to turn his head away to laugh.

Sangyeon merely lifted an unamused brow. He silently walked off the platform and landed on the ground floor with ease. Jacob followed swiftly after him. "When we first recruited you—and I use that term loosely—" He narrowed his eyes at Changmin in nod to his unconventionally forceful method of getting Sunwoo onto the team, "—we failed to mention something to you."

"I've pieced that much together," Sunwoo said, hand reaching up to cup the back of his head.

"Do you know what we're all connected by?" The blue and red spider asked. "Not simply by the names or insect we represent, but the destinies, the canon events written into our very DNA."

Sunwoo cracked his knuckles, heart kick-starting in his chest again like it was chugging up the incline of a rollercoaster. "What… what do you mean by canon?"

"A canon event is something like a pattern. It's a solidified event in your life, Sunwoo—in all of our lives." Sangyeon activated something with his watch, and the room was engulfed in a living hologram of orange. Lines zigzagged amongst each other like the connected dots, and Sangyeon expanded them with a flourish, revealing a familiar lineup of spider people to whom Sunwoo was acquainted with.

The lights of the hologram cut across the shadows of Sangyeon's face like a nightmare. "We're all made who we are by these canon events. Each spider being from each verse is shackled to the death of a mentor figure—"

Scenes of uncles and fathers being murdered flashed before Sunwoo's widened eyes, his body going slack at seeing his own uncle's dying breath leave his body. He couldn't even figure out what to say or think; his tongue had gone heavy in his mouth, words stringing together as slow and thick as wet sand. He couldn't breathe, all of a sudden. His uncle's eyes lost the light in them, they dimmed and dimmed and dimmed—hadn't it been all his fault? Couldn't he have been there to stop the robber?

"—and the death of one Captain or his… child."

More hunched over figures, one after the other, blood, tears, death—why was this being shown to him? Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes. Wait—did he just say Captain or his child?

"What," blew out of Sunwoo's mouth, breathlessly. "Wait, are you saying that—that Yn, my Yn, or her father is supposed to die?"

Sangyeon didn't answer immediately, but instead said gravely, "Canon events must happen, Sunwoo, or the fate of that world would be at stake. It would implode in on itself and destroy millions of innocent lives."

Sunwoo felt his heart rate spike, head whipping around to Jacob, to Changmin, to Chanhee. He imagined his eyes looked wild. "You're telling me she's going to die? Or her father—and, and what? What's the point of telling me all this?"

He couldn't let you die. He couldn't bear that devastation—not without at least trying to save you or your dad.

"When?" He huffed, fingers diving into his hair, mask fisted in one of his hands. "When is this happening?" He demanded.

A beat. "Three days."

Everything went quiet… and then the sound came rushing back in like a tidal wave crashing toward the shoreline.

"I have to save them—"

Jacob's voice cut in. "Sangyeon," like a warning.

But Sangyeon shook his head. "Oh no you don't."

Blood thundered in Sunwoo's ears as he yanked his mask back over his head and made a dash for the exit, only to have an orange, crystalline cage trap him in his place. Panic clambered into the dregs of his throat, suffocating suffocating suffocating…

"Sangyeon!"

"Sangyeon, don't do this!"

"He's just a fucking kid—!"

The world was spinning, and Sunwoo grunted as he punched and assaulted the cage walls, his friends pressing up against the outside and attempting to break through, too. "LET ME OUT!"

There were deep shadows beneath Sangyeon's eyes and he watched on with little to no sympathy. "It's for the good of the multiverse, Sunwoo. You'll understand someday."

Sunwoo bared his teeth. "You can't fucking expect me to not fight you on this."

"It will only be for a few days."

"Fuck you!" The amounting rage in Sunwoo's veins accumulated in a mass of electricity, and he forced that energy out at the force fields trapping him in. He screwed his eyes shut, arms swinging over his face, as he protected himself from the blast. When the cage shattered and blew his colleagues backward, Sunwoo wasted no time in sprinting down the hall.

An enraged roar followed after him—a web shooting past Sunwoo's face—not to grab Sunwoo, but instead to rip the watch right off his wrist.

He swore under his breath as he tripped over a piece of metal, cursing even more as he racked his brain for a way to get back to his earth.

"Bring me Kim Sunwoo," Sangyeon's voice boomed throughout the Spider Society's headquarters, accompanied by whirring red apocalypse lights, "don't let the Anomaly go home."

Anomaly—?

But Sunwoo had little time to dwell on that choice label as he slid through a closing doorway, nearly missing another spider's web flinging at his face.

"Okay, Sunwoo," he said aloud to himself as he emerged into the main quad area. It was bright out here, and hundreds of spider beings milled about like they were all at one massive Spider convention.

"He is an Anomaly, and considered armed and dangerous."

"Oh, shut the fuck up!" Sunwoo cried in distress, aiming his web shooter for one of the high rafters as everyone in the room set their eyes on him.

Dodging skilled versions of himself was not the easiest task, and he weaved through the masses like something akin to a thread through the eye of a needle.

He dared not look back as he crashed through one of the windows of the society headquarters and went soaring down into Earth 114's main city. The city itself was a funnel dive, forcing Sunwoo to zip his limbs to his side and thread the needle through multiple layers of hover transportation and floating roads. Cars were turned up on their sides and he nearly hit his head on a dozen traffic lights.

"Get him!"

"This guy is everywhere!" Sunwoo groaned as he leapt from hood to hood, eyes scanning for a place to duck into and hide. The tingling sensation in his brain was ever-present, and kept him well informed of the encroaching Lee Sangyeon.

"AHHH FUCK!" He screeched, forcefully diving off the side of the road. A long, screeching honk echoed after him. "It's always the buses!"

The level below became a labyrinth of metal rafters and pipes. Steam blew out from unseen origins, but provided the perfect cover for Sunwoo to slip through and catch his breath. He pressed his back up against one of the cool, metal bars, his fingers pressing against his eyes in an attempt to keep the tears at bay.

His heart was five palpitations from clearing his ribcage at this point. He needed a plan—he had to have a—

"What the—" Web slapped against his back and yanked him into an abandoned alcove, "—shit!"

Sunwoo groaned as he crashed to the hard ground, furiously rubbing his tailbone after the impact. He glanced up and met Changmin's eyes, who kneeled down beside him.

"Before you go all rage on me," Changmin said and held up his palms in surrender, "just hear me out, okay?"

Sunwoo's chest rose and fell rapidly. He narrowed his eyes on his friend whose face was hidden behind his own mask. "Yeah, okay… fine," he huffed, "but only… only because—" he staggered, climbing to his feet, "I need to catch my breath."

Changmin cocked his head as if he didn't believe that. "Ohh-kay whatever you say." But even as he said this, he still kept his hands out as if placating a hungry lion. "Sunwoo, I know it's a lot to take in—"

"Yeah, no shit," he spat. Fear spiked in his chest, so hard that it was experiencing a heart attack each time. His uncle's death replayed in his head over and over—but now your eyes, draining of life, joined that visual. It was enough to make dread weigh in the pit of his stomach, an anchor that dragged him down. And yet, the adrenaline was still there, the instinct to do something about it.

His friend suddenly tugged his mask off, revealing his face and mess of curls glistening in sweat and worry. "Hey man, I know it's scary and I know that it is unfair—"

"Hyung, he wants me to let them die!"

"It's to save lives, Sunwoo!"

"So you would let your own significant other die? Even if you have the foresight to save them?" Sunwoo scoffed in disbelief. "You would leave their life or their father's life to whatever bullshit—a canon event—dictated?"

Changmin's brows furrowed and he swallowed. "It is not that simple."

"It sounds pretty damn crystal clear to me."

His friend inched toward him. "We're all mad about it, Sunwoo—devastated, destroyed, even. It's not something easy to digest—and, and I admit that I haven't even fully digested it myself. It's not something I've really… I've really thought about."

Sunwoo stared into Changmin's eyes as if he could peer right into his soul. There was pain in Changmin's voice, a sort of tension that he could identify with. A tension that was human. Sunwoo's hands shook. "Changmin—" he exhaled, "—Changmin, I'm scared."

There was that sheen of compassion in Changmin's eyes as he planted his hands on either of Sunwoo's shoulders. "It's okay. You're gonna be okay. I got you."

And for a second, Sunwoo believed that.

Beep beep beep… Both heads whipped toward the watch on Changmin's wrist. "Target acquired. Changmin, we are heading toward you now." Sangyeon.

Betrayal ripped through Sunwoo, a strike of lightning, and he tore away from Changmin, stumbling and knees shaking. The latter gaped at him, then the watch on his wrist, mouth open like a gaping fish. "I—I swear to god, I didn't know it could do that—!"

It was no use. Sunwoo didn't have the time to entertain what ifs—he launched himself out of the alcove just as the walls crashed inward with the arrival of backup.

Think, Sunwoo, think!

Sunwoo furiously stumbled, clambered, whipped himself up and through vehicles screaming toward him and at him. His ears rang with the echoes of their horns, along with the distant (but encroaching) sound of Sangyeon's voice.

Why was keeping Sunwoo at bay so important? There was no way that stopping two people from being murdered would cause a rift in the space-time continuum. He couldn't be that important in the grand scheme of things—?

A hand grappled his ankle and Sunwoo yelped.

"Kid, you're making a mistake!" Sangyeon yelled above the cacophony of traffic raging all around them.

Sunwoo, heart beat tittering on the brink of collapse from the jumpscare, held firm to the hood of the SUV headed up and out of the main city. He peered under him, where Sangyeon stood just below, his hand stopping Sunwoo from going any further.

"You have nowhere to run, you know."

Sunwoo knew. God, he knew. "How could you step aside and let them die?" He exclaimed with his whole chest. He couldn't bear the thought.

A muscle feathered in Sangyeon's jaw. "You would choose the life of one person over millions? You're too young to understand, Sunwoo."

Youth, that was always the fucking argument, huh? Sunwoo's lip curled in disdain. "Just because you couldn't save whoever in your past doesn't mean that I—can't!" With the last word, he stomped Sangyeon's hand away with his other foot and flung himself further up to the next vehicle.

He heard the growl of rage behind him as he scrambled to swing himself up to the next thing. He slammed his fingers against his web shooter, spitting web fluid against the wind berating him at anything, literally anything it could catch.

When it caught onto something, he went flying with it—soaring up toward the sun on the high-speed train.

A flurry of spiders followed swiftly after him as Sunwoo continued his climb. Heart pounding, he gasped for air at this altitude, head twisting backward to catch a glimpse of how he had done so far.

You have nowhere to run, you know.

Well, Sunwoo didn't have to run anywhere. He just had to get far enough.

Sangyeon was the closest on his tail, his teeth bared, and for the first time, Sunwoo could see the threatening gleam of his razor-sharp canines. He made one massive leap up to where Sunwoo was, yanking down on his legs, clawing at his back. Sunwoo kicked his legs out in an attempt to fling him off—shot web fluid in Sangyeon's eyes, but it only seemed to irritate him even further.

Sunwoo cursed as he rolled out of the way of an incoming punch, cursing again when Sangyeon fisted the material of hoodie and pulled him into his grasp, predator meeting prey.

Sangyeon grasped him by the back of the head and slammed his face into the metal— "Maybe I should just get rid of you," he growled into Sunwoo's ear as the latter tried desperately to swing out of this hold, "you weren't even supposed to exist anyway."

Something foreign tugged at Sunwoo's chest. "Man, you gotta stop talking in riddles—!"

He pressed his side against the train car and horse-kicked Sangyeon's lower waist as hard as he possibly could. As if it happened in slow motion, he watched Sangyeon lose his grip and fumble to stay on board the train, but it was enough.

Sunwoo dove straight off the metro and headed straight for the now abandoned headquarters, hands jamming into the pockets of his hoodie and catching the wind to slow his fall. Wind roared through his ears, muffling the sound of Sangyeon's pure irritation as the older spider no doubt dove after him. Sunwoo's eyes zeroed in on his desired landing place, cradling his head with his arms to soften the impact.

The window shattered on impact—he tucked, rolled, and ran.

This time, he willed himself to turn invisible to the eye, even heightened spider eyes. His brain scrambled as he made a mad dash for the Go Home machine. It was somewhere around here—which damn hallway was it in—?!

"Where did he go?" Sunwoo heard from down one open corridor, which made him crawl up onto the ceiling and remain there until he got to his desired location. It hadn't been Sangyeon, but all of his friends had been chasing after him just the same.

He couldn't trust anyone.

Steeling his resolve, Sunwoo leapt off the ceiling and played around with the controls, dancing around the control panel and trying desperately not to panic. He couldn't have possibly run for an infinite amount of time; he only needed to buy himself time to use the one other option he had to get back home.

"Fuck fuck fuck," he muttered to himself when the monitor began playing a very loud song out of the speakers. But it was too late, even as his hand slammed down on the button to mute it.

"SOMEBODY'S PLAYING MY BALLROOM EXTRAVAGANZA." Yep, definitely a Chanhee playlist.

Sunwoo felt the sweat trickle down his spine—but then he swiped his way through controls and somehow managed to hit gold.

"Sequence initializing," announced the machine, and Sunwoo could have screamed with delight and relief.

That was, if he wasn't currently being hunted.

Still shrouded in his invisibility, Sunwoo swung himself onto the steel platform poised at the center of the massive chamber past the control board. A metal arm emerged from the side of the board, an amber orange light scanning over his form.

Chanhee and Changmin barreled into the room, going straight for the control board having yet seen Sunwoo on the platform.

"What's happening?" Changmin cried out as he gripped the edge of the railing, his eyes whipping between the platform and the computer.

Chanhee's two arms and mechanical spider limbs worked furiously to override the sequence. "I don't know!" He grunted. "It's not listening to me!"

"DNA match found. Go Home sequence, commencing."

Sunwoo's physical appearance materialized on the platform just as the machine arm began crafting a crystalline-like webbing around him from the ground up. When both Changmin and Chanhee saw him there, Sunwoo's arm raised, fingers poised over his web shooter trigger.

"Don't stop me," he said, forcing power into his voice. He was trying hard to not let his knees shake right now.

His friends gaped up at him. "Sunwoo, you can't—"

"WHAT'RE YOU DOING? STOP HIM!" And just like that, Sangyeon and company rushed into the chamber like a stampede of buffalo, the former of which going straight for the platform Sunwoo was on.

55% completion.

The crystal had just finished encasing Sunwoo in its cocoon, and Sunwoo yelled as Sangyeon slammed against the outside.

He flinched back. "Just let me go home! I want to go home!" He cried out, hugging his hands to his chest.

Sangyeon beat at the outside with his fist, at first, doing nothing to the crystal—but when it began to crack, Sunwoo's heart dropped clean into the pit of his stomach. "You know why you can't," the man grunted, rearing his fist back to land another solid CRACK to the cocoon, "I have to save the multiverse, and you're in my goddamn way."

75% completion.

"Just leave me alone!" Sunwoo shot back, then backed up against the opposite side of the capsule as Sangyeon's arm cracked through.

90% completion.

He cursed, feet scrambling against the platform as he tried to stay out of Sangyeon's reach.

"You're gonna regret—"

Sunwoo didn't catch the end of Sangyeon's sentence, though he could probably guess what it was. He felt the familiar, yet somehow alien, suction of the vacuum portal. One second, Sangyeon was breaking his fist against the crystal cocoon, and the next, Sunwoo was gone.

Sunwoo emerged in New York to a glorious late afternoon and fell straight out of that saturated, blue sky. He swore colorfully as he just managed to shoot his webs up at the nearest building and swing himself to safety. He landed on the edge of a rooftop, but he couldn't find the Air Jordan billboard he'd been at earlier.

But he noted Time Square just a few blocks down from him, and a few buildings he recognized from central New York City.

"Get to Yn," he muttered to himself, breath heaving as his heart palpitated in his chest. He determined the direction he had to go in, then began making the trek across the city.

His first priority was to find you, to warn you. He didn't know what or how the canon event would play out, but he desperately needed to make sure you and your dad were okay. You had to be okay—

Tears stung at the corners of his eyes as he narrowly missed another screaming bus, turning the corner to your apartment. The sun was sinking into the horizon now, casting an eerie, blood orange tint across the skyline.

He could barely get his thoughts in order: you, your dad, dead, alone, alone, alone.

As he neared your apartment, he could recognize your silhouette in the window as you hunched over your desk, no doubt studying hard as usual. A smile crept onto his face, a giddiness only you caused, sending a jolt of energy down his spine. He was relieved to be in your arms again soon, maybe even in time for dinner—

Wait.

He paused, web latching onto the fire escape above yours like usual, you never had sheer curtains. They were always shutters—

An internal alarm in his head screamed.

A blur of red and blue crashed into Sunwoo's body, sensing him and the body that tackled him, straight to the alley below. For a split second, he panicked at the thought of Sangyeon already finding him so soon, but it didn't take long for him to realize that… this wasn't Sangyeon.

He and his blue and red assailant wrestled on the floor of the alley, throwing punches that missed, ripping webbing from their eyes—Sunwoo swore as the other guy kneed him in the stomach and pinned his wrists and knees down.

"Who the fuck are you?"

Sunwoo's eyes widened as he came face to face with himself, but red and blue in all the weird places. There were silverish lines criss crossing across his suit mimicking the lines of a spider's web. This guy didn't sound like him though… He glared. "Who are you?"

With a surge of courage, he whipped his forehead upward and straight into his opponent's, sending him cursing and scrambling away.

Sunwoo wasn't in much better shape either, but though his forehead throbbed, he forced himself to his feet.

He and this… alternate Spiderman stood across from each other, walking in a tantalizingly slow circle, assessing the other. It felt awfully familiar, this experience; maybe he'd seen it in a meme somewhere.

"I'm Spiderman," Red and Blue drawled out slowly, carefully. His head cocked to the side. "Who are you?"

Sunwoo froze. "I'm Spiderman."

Red and Blue Spiderman stopped short. The white eyes of his mask narrowed. "Who sent you? Osborne? Doc Ock?"

Sunwoo made a face. "Who?" What was a Doc Ock...

"And what the hell do you want with Y—I-I mean, that… uh, that random girl in the apartment?" Red and Blue scratched the back of his head awkwardly as he stammered out a cover-up.

"Nice one," Sunwoo deadpanned. Then, as the information marinated in his head and the cogs in his brain began to turn, a realization dawned on him… and it filled him with pure terror.

Red and Blue must have sensed Sunwoo's dread. "What? Got nothing to say now? How about I—"

"What Earth is this?" Sunwoo blurted, head swiveling to and fro to find some kind of indication that he hadn't just royally screwed up. He shot a web up to the top of the nearest apartment building and swung himself up.

Red and Blue blinked. "Huh?" He swiftly followed after him. "Dude, dunno what rock you crawled out from under, but there's only one Earth in this solar system. You learn that shit in first grade." When he landed on the rooftop, he trailed after Sunwoo, who was busy soaking the skyline around him with a new pair of eyes.

Everything looked relatively the same.

It all smelled the same.

"—as always, this is your daily reminder to keep your eyes peeled for the Spider Menace!—" Sunwoo tracked that awfully annoying voice broadcasting from an electronic billboard more than a few blocks to the west. Featured on the screen was an older man with salt and pepper hair, and a mustache shaped like a broom. His face looked like one of those that were trapped in a perpetual state of irritation.

He made a face. "Who the fuck…"

Red and Blue made a guttural sound of disgust. "J. Jonah Jameson. My absolute best bud."

Sunwoo's head turned toward him. "People don't like you here?"

A snort. "I wish. Tough crowd, I guess."

Sunwoo pursed his lips into a small frown, but nodded. He could relate to that. The authorities and public had mixed views of him, especially at the start of his career. Even if he aimed to save people every time, he couldn't exactly pay for all of the damages done to buildings and structures and… well, people.

"You're not from here, are you?" Red and Blue said after a moment.

The dread, the panic, the fear, was beginning to creep into his nerves again. Sunwoo cracked his knuckles, trying to wrack his brain for next moves. Anything, anything. "Yeah," was all he could voice. Reality was a quicksand he was sinking into, deeper and deeper.

"I'm guessing that doesn't mean you're from LA, does it?"

Sunwoo laughed, but it was a sad sound. "I wish. No, it's more like… a different universe."

"So... you have your own Yn in that universe?"

Sunwoo swallowed. "Yeah."

His colleague gave a small nod, unable to find anything to say to soothe Sunwoo's nerves. There was so much trembling in his voice, his fingers, his knees…

From out of his periphery, Sunwoo spotted a hand extended out to him. "Well, since it seems we're both spider people—I'm Eric."

Sunwoo glanced from the hand offered and the red and blue mask, eyes locked on him expectantly. He clasped Eric's hand. "Sunwoo."

With a firm shake, Eric said, "Well Sunwoo, how about we find a way to get you home, huh?"

He hadn't even realized tears had dampened the fabric of his mask until he sniffled. Sunwoo released a shaky breath, eyes wandering back to the skyline that had looked so close to his, but was now a complete foreign entity. He had less than three days to get back home to you with seemingly no way back at all.

a/n: honestly unsure of a sequel lol but it would be cool to explore eric's spidey universe

tbz m.list

permanent taglist: @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @rnjfy @jaehunnyy @kpopjackie @spiderrenjunfics @soobin-chois @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l @mingiholic @ja4hyvn @vatterie @yogurteume @ethereal-engene @hyunjaespresent-deobi @justalildumpling @hongyangi @pxppxrmint @nerdypastacalzonespy @miusgirl @zhaixiaowen @wtfhyuck @winterchimez @sodafy @fluorescentloves @tinkerbell460 @kflixnet @gyulfriend

♡ reblogging from my shadow-reader days ♡

the element of power.

pairing: firebender!renjun x avatar!reader

genre: fluff, angst

word count: 5.4k

author’s note: renjun’s chapter to my 00 line x avatar series! i’ve gotten such kind feedback so far and i want you guys to know that your messages never fail to brighten my day and make me smile :’)))) thank you so so so so so much!!! 💕💞💓💗💖💘💝

warning(s): abuse, suggestive content 

additional: check out the art that the lovely and EXTREMELY talented steph ( @aqiaquas​ ) did for this fic here!

There’s just something about the Fire Nation that unsettles you.

Perhaps it’s because you’re from the Water Tribe, making you their (literal) polar opposite. Or because you’re sticking out like a sore thumb with your blue garb in a sea of red. Or the fact that they’re all staring at you and whispering amongst each other. It also doesn’t help that you’re being escorted by soldiers. Whatever the case may be, you just want to get this over with. 

You’re on your way to see the Fire Lord, who had his elite palace guards pick you up immediately upon your arrival. Most people would just see it as a courteous gesture, but Fire Lord Yoo is not a hospitable man. This is clearly a warning, though you’re not really sure what for. You may be the Avatar, but even you couldn’t take on the entire Fire Nation alone.

Honestly, you feel more like a prisoner heading for execution than an esteemed guest. 

Keep reading

♡ reblogging from my shadow-reader days ♡

i still love you | zhong chenle

word count: 17, 367

genre: high school!au, basketball!player, angst, fluff, you are a bet au??? lol idk 8 letters!au

warnings: lots of angst, playing of emotions, mentions of panic attacks and sex.

authors note: im finally back!! with a chenle fic!! okay so,, i wanted to thank everyone who loved 8 letters, the reaction to that fic was better than anything i could’ve ever imagined, so thank you so much!! this is like a chenle version from the same universe. but most importantly: i decided to put songs in some scenes to enhance the experience while reading, you don’t have to but if you want to listen to the ‘soundtrack’ of this fic click the ‘🏀’!!!!! please enjoy!! 

synopsis: high school can be complicated. thats why when your crush of three years, zhong chenle, approaches you out of nowhere offering to drive you home you are right to question his intentions.

Keep reading

sobbing, cause like you can feel whats going to happen, but that still doesn’t make it feel any better 😭

arrow | k.dy

pairing: kim doyoung x reader 

genre: angst, fluff  (outlaw!au, robinhood!au, medieval!au)

warnings: mentions of past abuse, mentions of blood/gore/violence, major character death

description:

Doyoung makes you promise him something you’re not so sure you can keep.

words: 8.1k

notes: phew ok so i finally got this baby up after it had been slowly collecting dust in google docs. if im being completely honest im not that confident in this piece (when am i ever lol) but regardles i hope you enjoy! also feedback is always greatly appreciated! :) 

- lilac

The sound of thundering hooves pierces through the night. You move with their rhythm. Faster. Faster. Faster. You need to get away. Need to escape. 

You can barely make out the path in front of you, the only source of light you have is the periodic flashes of lightning from the storm that rages above you. The wind howls past you as you get faster, the sound of it mingling with the rushing of blood in your ears. Always faster. The rain that soaks through your cloak is unforgiving, and combined with the ice cold wind it chills to the bone. You press yourself closer to your horse, seeking both to accelerate and to receive at least some form of warmth. 

Hooves continue to pound against the ground beneath you, but you know the sound isn’t coming from solely your own horse. You can’t make out the figures behind you but their shouts cut through the noise of the storm. 

Keep reading

stay safe out in the real world ladies and gents!

hiii !! i love your writing so much omg🥲🥲 can I request a jo oneshot (f!reader) where the reader is at a convenience store and some older guy starts to prey on her (does that make sense ? 😭) and the reader doesn’t know what to do until she sees jo and asks him to pretend to be her bf or maybe she gives him hints that she’s in need of help. after the guy leaves maybe jo and the reader could exchange numbers or smth ? JDJDJD my english is so bad so idk if that even made sense im so sorry if it didnt 😭 also its totally okay if you’re not comfortable with writing this! im just in need of more jo oneshots (&team oneshots in general) they’ve been stuck in my head for so long 🥲

safe . asakura jo

pairing: stranger!jo x female reader

warnings: stalking, reader is being followed, creepy man, typical saved from a stalker scenario, jo is a total sweetheart, angst and fluff, petnames (babe, pretty)

song rec: young luv - stayc

a/n: sorry for the wait anon. and your english is perfectly fine, i understood it fully! i also feel you so much on the lack of &t content on this app! maybe i'll start doing fic recs to provide you guys with more works by other amazing authors i love!! also, this is a great request and i enjoyed writing it so much!!! enjoy ♡

it's a dark, cold night. the sun set around three hours ago, so it's getting to be pretty late into the night.

you walk down the street clutching your jacket closer to your body, shoulders pulled nearly up to your ears.

that's when you hear footsteps behind you.

the first thing that's odd about this is the fact that this is a route you take home often, and you've literally never run into anyone at this time of night due to the roads all being side streets.

as a normally anxious person, you think of what you've been taught to do in this situation- the most common trick. you take three right turns in a row, not getting lost since you know the roads well. however, even as you come back to where you first heard the footsteps behind you, you can still hear them, and they sound as if they're coming closer.

you panic at this point, speeding up until you're nearly running. the footsteps become faster and louder to match your pace.

you make a sharp turn into a convenience store, but the man follows you inside. noticing the cashier looks like a teen who would likely not be of much help, you settle for heading towards the tall guy in the back near the drinks.

as you get near him, you grab his sleeve, effectively startling him. "did you wait for a long time?" he looks extremely confused. you have to lean up on your toes as much as possible to get closer to his ear because he's so much taller than you. you do so and explain the situation in a whisper as the man walks into the aisle behind you.

he quickly looks concerned and holds your hand, seeming to realize he should play along. "i didn't wait long at all, pretty."

you smile up at him, eternally grateful. you think to yourself that you owe him severely if you ever meet again.

"do you want something to drink?" he asks, seeming to really get into the boyfriend role. still holding your hand tightly, he steps back and gestures to the fridge area for you to pick.

"you don't have to do that, babe," you say, blushing a bit.

"no, no, go ahead. you should really drink something," he insists. "you've been walking for a while, you must be thirsty."

you tilt your head, not sure if he's serious or just playing the role well. he nods his head. you pick out a drink you like and he takes it from your hand and picks out his own drink as well. he walks towards the front of the store still holding your hand.

he looks back at the man who was following you to find him already staring, but he doesn't make any move to come closer to the two of you.

after the nice guy checks out, you both walk out of the store.

"would you like me to walk you home?" he asks. "just to be safe."

you contemplate for a moment before nodding. "i live near here, so it's not that far of a walk. thank you so much for this- and the drink, too."

you both begin to walk in the direction of your house, still hand-in-hand.

"of course," he smiles sweetly. "i hate how careful ladies have to be walking around nowadays... it's crazy that something bad could happen to you even in your own neighborhood."

you huff. "tell me about it. i've only been followed like this a few times, but i hear it happens to a lot of girls my age."

he sighs. "it's ridiculous. oh, i'm jo, by the way."

you smile up at him. "i like that name. i'm ____."

"pretty name for a pretty girl," he cheeses.

you cringe, giggling. "thanks for the compliment, but that was so corny."

he laughs. "i know- i realized after i said it."

you talk and laugh the whole way home, up until you get to your house. you didn't even mean to let him walk you the whole way home, you would've stopped him at the start of your street, but you kind of lost track, being so distracted.

"well, this is it." you turn towards him, finally letting go of his hand. "again, thank you so much. i don't know what i would have done if you hadn't helped me."

he smiles shyly, his face flushed. "no problem. could i maybe get your number? you can text or call me next time something like this happens. i live just down the street, so i'll come running."

you blush, taking his phone to add yourself as a contact. "you're really cute. maybe we could just hang out sometime, no creepy man involved?"

he chuckles. "yeah- that'd be nice."

you say your goodbyes. he watches until you get to your door to make sure you make it inside okay before you see him leave through your window.

you blush as you think of the whole interaction again.

thank you, jo, you think. for making me feel safe.

©nichoswag | do not copy my work or repost onto any other platform.

I’m getting 2nd-male lead syndrome, even though he’s the boyfriend 😭

ghostin (l.dh)

☆。.:*·ﾟwc 2559 angst ౨ৎ ୨୧ haechan x fem!reader, the one that got away, unrequited love, emotional infidelity, mentions of alcohol based off ghostin' by ariana grande [masterlist • reblogs + feedback appreciated]

one: he leaves you

from haechan 🤍: i just got the keys to my new place from haechan 🤍: it’s so much better than the pictures from haechan 🤍: i really wish you were here

your phone buzzes on your night stand.

picking it up, you can feel your heart breaking into pieces all over again as you read the text messages. i really wish you were here. you try to stifle the tears bubbling up in your eyes, so as to not wake up the man sleeping beside you.

but it is no use. you can feel your boyfriend stirring awake beside you. “are you okay? who was that?”

“just haechan,” you respond, in between sniffs. “he just moved into his new place.”

with an understanding nod, he pulls you closer to him, wrapping his arms around you. you nuzzle closer to him, taking up all his warmth. it isn’t what you want, but it is what you have. he lays beside you, gently stroking your hair. “it’s okay, i got you.” he whispers until you fall asleep.

if only that could solve everything, but at least it brings you comfort in this moment.

two: he loves you

from haechan 🤍: hiiiii from haechan 🤍: im sooo drynk riggt now from haechan 🤍: can i calll you??

you can barely respond when his call comes in.

you’re sitting on the couch of your boyfriend’s friend’s apartment. all night, they’ve been playing drinking games and you’ve occasionally joined in, but you mostly sat with your boyfriend’s arm around you as you nursed your diet coke.

when your phone rings, everyone stops to look at you. “i, uh, i should take this.” you stammer, walking out of the room, but not before shooting your boyfriend an apologetic glance.

“hae, are you okay?” you whisper into the phone.

“that rhymes,” he giggles on the other side of the line.

“i know,” you can’t help but smile, thinking about just how much you wish he was here with you. “are you okay?”

“things are so different here,” he begins, “especially without you.”

you feel your heart skip, but then you look back into the hallway and you see your boyfriend and his friends laughing together and you can’t help but feel a pang of guilt. “haechan, i don’t know what to say.”

“i know, i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have called you.”

“no, it’s not that. i don’t want you to feel like i’m not here for you anymore, just because you’re not here anymore. just tell me what’s up? how’s your life there?”

you sit on the floor in the hallway listening to haechan ramble about his apartment, and how his neighbors are super loud at night, and how the doorman always glares at him when he walks in, and how the old lady that lives above him always bakes him cookies to thank him for bringing in her groceries. he goes on about his job, and his coworkers, and his bosses, and the friends he’s made there. and he does this until he falls asleep.

all eyes are on you when you walk back into the living room after you hang up. you return back to your seat. “i’m tired, i wanna go home.” you tell your boyfriend, who is shifting in his seat beside you.

he bids his friends farewell and the two of you leave.

the car ride home is completely silent, save for the pop song playing on the radio. “what did he want?” your boyfriend finally asks you.

“i don’t know,”

“you were on the phone with him for an hour and a half?”

“i think he just needed someone to talk to.”

you can’t tell if he was jealous or angry at you at this moment but you both leave the car enveloped in a quiet unease that neither of you address ever again.

three: you lose him

from haechan 🤍: i’m going to be in town this week from haechan 🤍: i would really love to see you

you stood in front of the vanity in your bathroom, re-applying your lipgloss for the third time already. the day you would see haechan after eight months was finally here and you just wanted to look perfect.

your boyfriend appears next to you as you put your things away. “how do i look?” you asked him, staring at him intently through the mirror.

“you look beautiful,” he says. the sadness that is always lingering in his eyes and in his voice is still there, but you don’t seem to notice.

“i’m really nervous,” you hold a mirror close to your face, anxiously monitoring how your makeup looks.

“do you want me to drive you there?”

“you don’t have to,”

“i want to,” he tells you before leaving the room. “i’ll be waiting downstairs.”

you sit in the passenger’s seat of your boyfriend’s car, twiddling with the hem of your skirt, excitedly counting down the minutes until you’re in the booth of the diner that you and haechan always would go to before he moved.

you finally arrive and your boyfriend parks at the front. “call me if you need anything.” he leans in to give you a kiss.

pulling away, you open your purse and reapply your lipgloss.

“thank you again for driving me here.”

“it’s not a problem. i love you, you know that right?” he asks you.

“yeah, i do.” you exit the car, closing the door behind you.

you pick your booth by the window and watch your boyfriend’s car drive off.  the soft hum of the conversations around you weave through the air as you patiently wait for him, your fingers tracing the condensation on the side of the glass of water you ordered when you got there. 

finally the door chimes, signaling his entrance. he walks in holding the hand of a girl whose presence immediately sends ripples of disappointment down your spine.

time seems to pause as you observe them approach your table. a myriad of emotions danced across your face, and as he looks into your eyes, you try your best to stop your smile from faltering.

“it’s so good to see you,” he greets, a genuine warmth in his voice. you stand up to hug him and you enter into a collision of past memories and present uncertainties.

“you too, haechan. i’ve missed you,” you reply.

and then he introduces her – the girl whose hand he held, whose presence altered the dynamics of this reunion. “this is my girlfriend.”

that ten letter word that you were dreading. you knew it was true but you were hoping that you could somehow convince hope to make it not true.

you had been so consumed by the fantasy of what could have been – what should have been.

it should have been you. he should have told you that he loved you. he should have asked you to be his girlfriend. he should have told you to drop everything and run away with him. he should have chosen you every step of the way,

but he didn’t.

and maybe if he did, it would have been you sitting beside him in the booth, holding his hand so tightly, like he would disappear in a moment. it would have been you causing his eyes to crinkle in the way that it does when he laughs. it would have been you making him feel so happy and so complete.

but it wasn’t.

you wanted to be happy for him. because he was finally happy again and that was the most important thing to you – his happiness, and his smile, and his joy that just hasn’t been there in a while. but how could you be happy when you’re mourning the greatest loss. you always lived with the thought that there could, possibly, sometime in the future, be a chance that the two of you could make it work. but as he fed his girlfriend a fry from off his plate, you realized that was never going to happen.

“do you want us to take you home?” haechan asked after he had paid the bill.

you could think of about five hundred and fifteen things you would rather do than be in the car for even ten minutes with them. “no, my boyfriend isn’t too far from here.”

you stand outside the diner as your boyfriend’s reliable gray car pulls up to the front.

“how was it?” he asks you when you sit down.

“i don’t really want to talk about it,” you say quietly.

you spend the rest of that weekend wrapped up in your comforter, only coming out of bed to eat when your boyfriend begged you to.

on monday morning, he comes into the room. “do you still want to go to my sister’s engagement party? it’s fine if you’re not up for it. i’ll just let her know.”

“no, i think i’ll be fine.” you weakly answer, “i want to go.”

that evening you manage to get yourself dressed and dolled up even though you feel completely lethargic. when you arrived at the party, you stood at your boyfriend’s side as he greeted his sister and her fiancée. the four of you stood for a while, chatting. at least the three of them were. you, on the other hand, were trying to find the easiest way to slip away to the open bar.

eventually you found your out – your boyfriend was called to talk by some family friends and you could finally escape to the bar. “can i get a martini, please?” you ask the bartender.

you sit at the bar, scrolling through your texts with haechan again. he had texted you a few times since you saw each other at the diner, but you just didn’t have it in you to respond to him. locking your phone, you look around the party, spotting your boyfriend talking to some of his old friends. he looked so happy and you couldn’t help but feel sorrier and guiltier for the way you’ve been feeling the past few days. but that didn’t stop you from flagging the bartender again to order another martini.

the bartender had replaced your drink twice already when they called you for dinner. you stand up from the barstool, your movements betraying the effects of intoxication to the bartender. “i think we need to cut you off now,” they joke with you.

you laugh it off, but still appear unsteady. you make your way over to your table, a slight sway in your posture. you kept telling yourself to keep walking straight, but as you weaved through the tight dining space, your steps were marked by a wobbly and lurching quality.

you finally make it to the table, not so elegantly sliding into your assigned seat.

“where were you?” your boyfriend leans in to ask you.

“at the bar,” you whisper yell in response.

“we can tell,” his sister jokes across the table from you. you give her a tight lipped smile.

the waiter places the dishes on the table. everyone digs into the meals in front of them, but your appetite is absent. instead of savoring it, you absentmindedly toy with the food on your plate. your boyfriend, concerned, softly encourages you to eat but you brush off his suggestion, insisting that you’re not hungry.

“you haven’t eaten all day,” he persists and for some reason, that just sparks frustration within you. you abruptly excuse yourself from the table, stumbling as you hastily exit the dining hall. you hear your boyfriend hurriedly apologize to the rest of the table before following you outside.

“what’s going on?” he calls out after you. 

“nothing, i just don’t want to be in there.”

“you told me that you wanted to be here.”

“well, i don’t anymore.”

“can you please talk to me?” he pleads, genuine concern in his voice.

“i can hear everyone talking about me,” you confess, your emotions bubbling to the surface.

confused, he asks, “what?”

“i know your friends hate me. your sister hates me too.”

“what? no one hates you.” he insists, trying to reassure you. “they love you; they just don’t know you like i do.”

with a straight face, you dismiss his words. “you don’t have to lie to me. no one loves me.”

his eyes widen in disbelief. “i love you.”

“well, haechan doesn’t,” you declare softly.

“what?”

“haechan doesn’t love me.” his name heavy on your lips, like it was a bad word that you weren’t allowed to say.

a moment of silence hangs in the air as he processes your revelation. he scoffs, running his hands through his hair in disbelief. “what is this about?” he sits down beside you.

“he has a girlfriend,” a heavy revelation hangs in the air. the dim lighting of the quiet street casts a shadow on both of you.

“oh,” he pulls you into him, his strong arms enveloping you. the scent of his cologne surrounds you as you rest your head against him, closing your eyes to shield you from your reality. unbeknownst to you, he struggles to keep his bittersweet smile at bay. he wants to comfort you and be there for you but he can’t help but love knowing that now he doesn’t have to share you with someone that you never belonged to.

the silence stretches, broken only by the muffled sounds of distant traffic. his soft hands caress your arms in an attempt to soothe the storm of emotions raging within you. your tears stream down your face onto his suit jacket as you find solace in the warmth of his embrace.

after a while, you sit up straight. “i’m sorry,” you say, your voice barely audible.

“it’s fine,” he reassures you. “i can get it dry cleaned.”

you shake your head. “no, not the suit.” he cocks his head in confusion. “i mean for everything.”

“y/n,” he begins, but you cut him off.

“i’m a terrible girlfriend.”

“no you’re not,”

“you’re so good to me and i’m terrible to you. that’s why your friends hate me. that’s why your sister hates me. i’m so selfish. i’m so horrible. i–”

“you’re not selfish or horrible.”

“i am.”

“you’re not.” he lifts a hand to gently wipe away a lingering tear on your cheek.

“i spent a weekend crying about some guy who has a girlfriend, while you were at the door waiting for me to come out,”

his sighs, taking in the weight of your words but refusing to let you dwell in self blame. “you guys have a history that i guess i don’t understand.”

“i heard your sister telling you to break up with me.”

he looks down the quiet street, a furrow forming on his brow as he recalls that conversation. “i-”

you look at him, your eyes searching for answers“i know you defended me, but sometimes i wonder why you don’t just break up with me.”

“because, i love you.” the words echo in the quietness.

“i hurt you. every day of our relationship, i have hurt you. you never say anything, but i know it hurts watching me cry over him.”

he meets your gaze, sincerity in his eyes as he navigates the intricate web of emotions between the two of you. “i still love you.”

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dont mind me, imma just wallow in angst alone

｡𖦹⋆ best mistake | KANG TAEHYUN

pairing : ex!taehyun x gn!reader x bf!yeonjun

genre: drabble; angst

summary: finally dating yeonjun, he decided to introduce you to his friends. you were unaware that he was friends with the guy you were on and off with while getting to know yeonjun at the time. you thought getting your boyfriend's friends was nerve wrecking, but knowing the guy you once loved would be around too made that feeling worse.

wc: 1.4k (the drabble is not drabbling)

warnings: mentions of potential two-timing but not really?, oblivious yeonjun, jealous taehyun, feels are feelingg, physical affection.

a/n: this was requested by @seolis-world as part of my slumber party event! take a look here if you're interested in joining! ᡣ𐭩

after months of getting to know yeonjun and figuring out whether you wanted to make him your official boyfriend, the day had come when it was time to meet his friends.

you both made it official when he had asked you to be his a couple of weeks ago, and each day comes as a learning curve, still getting used to him loving you. there's already a routine implemented in your relationship and for once in your life you felt like this is going to be a healthy one—one to keep in the books.

"you okay?" yeonjun asks, turning the key to his apartment door. he knew this was one of the things you were overthinking about too much, because he knew your stand point regarding friends liking their friends' partners.

what if they don't like you? will you have to remain distant with them? wouldn't it be awkward that way?

"just a little nervous." you admit, your heart pounding in your ears from being so anxious. it was weird because you're usually really good with meeting people for the first time. perhaps it was because it's your boyfriend's friends that he also calls his brothers.

"it'll be okay, trust me." yeonjun reached out to give your hand a reassuring squeeze before opening the door and letting you in, making his way to the kitchen to put away food that you bought to cook dinner.

from the entrance of the apartment you're greeted with the back of the couch and the t.v in front of it. on the couch there was already one of yeonjun's friends seated, and he turns his head before you could even process anything.

"___?" round doe eyes looked just as confused and surprised as you were. they were eyes that once held the galaxy for your stars for months.

your lips part to parrot him with his name but yeonjun returns to you, offering to take the rest of the bags. not without noticing that you seemed to have encountered a ghost when there was clearly someone present. his eyes flicker to his friend then to you and back to turn to his friend, his back to you.

"oh, taehyun? you two know each other?" yeonjun cocks his head to the side, a genuine interest in how he already knew your name before anything was exchanged.

your eyes held a sharp gaze with his, watching him open his mouth almost saying something that would potentially make this relationship only last for a couple of weeks. you shake your head at him, maintaining the strong eye contact in the hopes he says what you want him to say.

"no. beomgyu's been running his mouth about you seeing someone, and I assumed this is that person."

that person. ouch.

yeonjun scoffs, shaking his head from taehyun's reasoning. he snakes his arm around your waist as he brings you closer to taehyun in the living area to 'introduce' you to each other.

"taehyun, this is ___, and we've been dating for a couple of weeks now. ___, this is taehyun, my friend who's like a brother to me."

you swear you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach, sinking in the acidity and disintegrating at the realisation.

a tight-lipped smile was the most you could manage through your facial expression all while you gave him a short bow, but taehyun didn't react nor reciprocate to you.

guilt washes over you and you were afraid he was pissed at you for dating his friend, but you had no idea how far down his heart had also plummeted. you were his... once. was it inconsistent? perhaps. but you were still that person that made him anticipate the next day with a new outlook.

"he's like that, don't worry. while you get acquainted I'll start on dinner. the rest of the boys are coming home soon." your boyfriend places a chaste kiss to your temple, his hand giving you another one of his reassuring squeezes, but at your hip this time, before making his way back to the kitchen.

he left you to face taehyun silently standing there, eyes nervously staring at each other until you decided to break the uncomfortable silence.

"it's nice to meet you... again, hyun." you trail your last couple of words once yeonjun was out of earshot.

"don't do that." taehyun rubs his temples under his bangs. his hair's grown out so much since you last saw each other. you always told him how good he looks with his hair around this length.

"do what—"

"make me lie to yeonjun and then calling me hyun." he snaps.

"I'm sorry, I had no idea you knew each other." you shuffle your feet in spot, fiddling with the strap of your bag. "I didn't want to make it awkward if he knew."

"yeah, of course." his voice toned down. you expected him to lash out at you some more, get mad at you that you left him and move on just for you to be dating one of his closest friends.

"I'm sorry h- taehyun." you walk closer to him—something you. never thought you'd do again—reaching out your hand to take ahold of his familiar calloused fingers. "I'm really sorry."

he looks at you so your eyes meet. they still had that glint in them if you look carefully, but you shouldn't. you have yeonjun now.

he sighs before sliding his hand out of your hold, "your boyfriend's probably looking for you."

"um, one more thing." your voice was meek yet taehyun seemed to be focused on you, the same as ever. "can we not make it weird?" you ask him sincerely, just wanting the atmosphere to be bearable if you were to come around often.

"if you're asking me to pretend that I don't know you, yeah. I can do that... if that's what you want. I'm sorry what happened between us was a big mistake." after all this time he's still willing to do whatever just for you. his eyes glint again and you hate yourself for hurting him in the past, using him to pass time, as a backup just in case things didn't work out between you and yeonjun. you hate that you left him, him who you convinced yourself to call him the love of your life at one point.

that gut wrenching feeling only felt worse as more seconds pass by, not meaning what he explained but you knew it was probably better that way.

shaking your head, you bite the inside of your cheek as a way for you to retain those tears at the brim of yours eyes.

"taehyun, are we okay?" you ask quietly.

"I'm gonna be completely honest with you, I'm still trying to get over you." he exhales a deep sigh mixed with a scoff and laugh of disbelief. "fuck, ___, I still love you-"

"we can't." you clench your jaw from his confession. you refuse to let him knock your walls down because he was in the past, but he's still here in the present and it's something you weren't really expecting. at all. "I hope we can be friends one day..."

taehyun's shoulders drops slightly, his eyes now looking at yours with a tender hold. "if that's the only way I can still have you in my life, then I hope so too."

you mentally curse at yourself for your rash decisions in the past and now you're suffering the consequences. you gulp, indecisive whether you should say what you're about to say, but since everyone's deciding to lay their cards on the table you might as well.

"I did love you taehyun." you could feel yourself choking up. you fucked up and you know you did but it's too far gone now.

"I know." he slowly nods. "I hope yeonjun makes you happier."

you force a smile, mentally kicking yourself for letting your lips slightly quiver as you nod and you just know that taehyun noticed. turning to walk into the kitchen you wrap your arms around yeonjun's torso from behind, digging your cheek into his side which caught him off guard.

he lays the knife and the vegetable down on the cutting board, lifting his arm and turning in your hold as he scans your face with worry.

"hey, what's wrong?" he coos, stroking your hair and letting his lips stay at your forehead as he kisses it multiple times.

you shake your head, refusing to tell him the truth.

"if it's taehyun, it's okay, don't worry too much. he'll warm up to you at some point." he reassures you, rubbing your back slowly. the warmth just enough to comfort you despite your heart aching in your chest and your ears drowning in its thumps.

"I hope so." your voice quiet in attempt to steady your breathing, careful to not let the tears fall. or rather, to not let yourself fall.

taglist: @choiwrld @yjusei @wccycc @lizdevorak @fairybin @laylasbunbunny @acaiasahi @itaehynz @cha0thicpisces @fairybinie @yunkiwii @aprilisque @ja4hyvn @https-yeonjun @lovejoshua @seolis-world @jak-ey @smutnoullitheorem @my313 @ericyjun @luvsoobs @yeonyeonyeonjun @junniieesbby @kyrkitten @day6andetcetera @dainsleif-when-playable @txt-yaomi @soobinsman (if you're interested in being part of the taglist please refer to the taglist spreadsheet here and send me an ask!)

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— [12:17AM]

pairing:  p. jongseong x gn!reader // content: college au, mentions of alcohol consumption // lowercase intended // wc: 781

a/n: just your average best friends with unconfessed feelings au... this time in drabble form! this is also my first fic on this acc so i hope you enjoy! please give feedback if you liked it, it would mean the world ♡ ps. happy comeback day!

the night air sits a little chilly on jay's skin, his t-shirt and jeans not doing much to keep the warmth on an september night. if he looked on the bright side, jay supposes it's a good thing the alcohol comfortably buzzing in his system lets the cold turn into more of a cool breeze, but on the other hand...

"jay, i think the world stopped spinning!"

jay sighs, turning his head to you. you turn back to him, eyes shining bright as you lean your head on the swing chain. his jacket runs a little too big on you, the ends of the sleeves covering your palms as you hold onto the swing. "do you wanna go for round 2?"

"we have to go home," he chides, exasperated.

"oh relax," you wave off, pushing up the sleeve to take a good look at your empty wrist. "it's only um... 11:00! live a little!"

jay whips his phone out, the time on the lockscreen glaring at full brightness. "it's midnight."

you pout, kicking the bark beneath your feet sullenly. your right heel comes flying off, landing somewhere between the park bench and the see-saw. "lame..."

jay gives you a flat look, making a mental note to pick up your shoe before you leave the park. “you barely made it out of the karaoke bar in one piece, and you want to go for a round 2?”

“well i’m here, aren’t i? perfectly fine and normal!”

“really? what street are we on.”

"you know i'm bad with directions!"

he resists the urge to run a hand down his face. the only reason jay even agreed to coming to the college mixer with you was because he knew you wouldn't fare well if left on your own. the last time you went out drinking, you threw up in the bushes a couple feet behind the street vendor, and the time before that, you'd drunk-dialed him at 3:00AM in tears, and when he managed to get out of the house wearing mismatching flip-flops ready to find you, your friends had managed to grab the phone from you and tell him that you were only crying over a stray cat that wouldn't bother to give you the time of day.

and of course, he was there for you both times, and all the times before that, which only meant that he needed to be there for you this time too. (jay tries not to think about the implications of that statement for too long, otherwise he'll start feeling as stupid as heeseung's all-seeing looks tell him he is.)

you narrow your eyes, waggling your finger at him. "so are you gonna tell me about it?"

"about what?"

"the mixer!" you exclaim. "i saw minjeong making googly-eyes at you the whole time. did you get her number?"

jay pauses. "who?"

you throw your hands in the air, exasperated. "um, kim minjeong? literally every guy in our year would pay to get her to even look at them for five seconds, and she was looking at you all night. for free!"

frowning, jay tilts his head. “doesn’t ring a bell.”

you lean back on the swing, and jay readies himself in case you lose balance and fall backwards. "you're so hopeless, jay. i keep inviting you to these things cause everyone keeps calling you painfully single, but we end up having this conversation every time. isn't there anyone you like?"

yeah, he bites his tongue. you.

he could say it. he could say it right now. maybe if he said it, then it would be like ripping off a bandaid. quick—not quite painless, but it had to be better than existing in this weird limbo where he's the first one you call when you're drunk and you're the first person he thinks of telling when anything good in his life happens. if he said it, no matter the result, at least he wouldn't have to keep it a secret anymore. at least you would know.

but instead, jay says:

"it's late. we need to go back."

there's a brief pause, one where you shift in your swingseat and the cold metal presses against the skin of his palms as he wrestles with the weight of everything he's squashed down inside him, yet again.

“…can we at least get fishcakes on our way home?" you ask, and you at least have the decency to sound a little sheepish about it.

your shoulder moves slightly, jacket slipping off your shoulder. jay sighs, walking over to adjusting it, before zipping it up fully. it would only get colder through the night. he really was an idiot.

"yeah. the usual?"

nobodyyy was more surprised than i when my 5 month (very concerning, btw) streak of being unable to cry was broken by the look on Luca's face at the train station when he realized that Alberto wasn't coming with him.

that look broke my heart, y'all. I was a sobbing mess for a good ten minutes after the film (even more during the credits when the sketches showed them writing and calling each other).

I need more cruel Alastor fics. I need more hurt/no comfort Alastor fics. I was thinking about it while I was reading the latest chapter of @valerie-is-in-the-cupboard ‘s Taking Care and realized that I should write some hurt/comfort and hurt/no comfort Alastor fics (go read Taking Care if you haven’t already).

I already have an angsty lyric fic in my head based on “Say That We’re Sweetharts Again” by Dorothy Shay and I have been thinking about Old Friend’s from the poll not too long ago. Get ready to cry my friends! And if anyone has angsty Alastor fics please send them to me! ❤️