Bro My Teacher Started Crying A While Ago Too - Tumblr Posts

nah cuz y I’m finna cry in the middle of class😭

☆♡ We're both stressed ♡☆ — Bang Chan

word count: 3.1k

paring: Chan x afab!reader

genre: angst/fluff

warnings: afab!reader, established relationship, crying, stress, mentions of shouting, pet names (sweetheart, sweetie, love), bestfriend!Jisung, stressed!Chan, comfort, if I left anything out lmk, kinda proofread? (sorry!)

It's been a rough couple of months with the comeback and all the stress that comes with it. Wanting to spend more time with Chan but being unable to due to the ungodly amount of hours he's been spending in the studio with Jisung and Changbin. The little amount of time you got to see him while they were preparing for the comeback has now doubled.

That's why right now you're laying on that iconic couch that sits in the studio, mindlessly scrolling through the many socials that you have on your phone. Luckily it's just the two of you inside since Changbin and Jisung had said that they wanted to freshen up with showers or food, leaving the two of you to just be in the others presence, something that the two of you hadn't gotten in weeks.

While you lay there just scrolling on your phone, you see the multiple fan accounts that you follow talking about their comeback announcements. You giggle at the ones about the other members, specifically Jisungs, sending them to him mimicking the comments when you text him. “He’S sO hAwT!?!?” After doing this a couple of times, you keep scrolling and you see the ones about your one and only Chan.

You try your best to hold back your laughs after seeing all the comments about how hot he looks in his new photos, some even cause the laugh to slip only for you to look at Chan to make sure you haven’t disturbed his work in any way. All you can feel is pride that you managed to be the one that he has chosen to be with… that is until you scroll a little further.

Your heart sinks when you find all the ones talking about how his future someone has such large shoes to fill. One stood out the most to you, even though in your best judgement, it shouldn't have. “I bet if he gets someone, she'll be too insecure and cause him way more stress than he needs or wants. Must be sad yk?”

Does Chan know that they say these things about him and his future someone? He must with how much he takes what they say into consideration. But why hasn't he said anything to you about it? Is that maybe what he thinks as well? As thoughts begin to wreck your already oversensitive brain, you stare into the back of his head.

Almost like instinct, you hear a loud huff and the sound of his headphones crashing onto his desk. “You know, I can feel you staring holes into the back of my head Y/N.” He says, running his hand through his dark brown hair, turning in his chair to look at you. You look down when you hear him speak, causing him to sigh softly before rolling the chair closer to you. “Where did the guys go? Thought they were going to the bathroom or something.” “Well, that's kinda what they said.. Han went to get himself something to eat and Bin wanted a shower so god knows what he's doing now since that was 45 minutes ago.”

He lets out a grumble before going back to what he was doing on his laptop, starting to bounce his leg. “Is there something that you need help with?” you ask him before slowly walking over to him causing him to jump and suddenly shut his laptop, before looking up at you with shocked eyes. The sudden motion shocks you to say the least but you just show a sad smile before walking back over to the couch for a few minutes only to leave not soon after to give him the privacy he suddenly seemed like he needed.

About a week has passed since then and you're currently sitting in the dorms with almost everyone for a movie night. The sight still plastered in your brain as if it happened 20 minutes ago, him shutting his laptop and giving you that look. Sighing shakily, you nestle deeper into your spot on the couch between Jisung and Changbin, Chan choosing not to attend the movie saying “he still has too much to work on” or you’d be cuddled up to him like you usually did during these events.

It seems that the two beside you notice your behaviour, looking between each other before Jisung taps your shoulder. “Hey, is everything alright? You seem off.” he asks you, only causing your mind to race worse. You look at him with a small smile before slowly nodding. If he's noticed how you’re acting that means so has everyone else making you do a quick glance over the whole room, seeing everyones eyes locked on the movie that was playing on the screen. “I’m fine Sungie, don't worry that pretty brain of yours and enjoy the movie.” you whisper back to him before silently excusing yourself from the room.

You find yourself in front of his bedroom door, just staring at it. It makes your heart race with your mind as you think about what's on the other side of this door. Your beloved slaving away over his laptop, eyes most likely bloodshot and dry from the hours he spends staring at it. A small flat spot probably pressed into his hair from his headphones, back with an arch that will make him complain that he needs to fix his posture tomorrow and probably the worlds largest bundle of stress.

Before you could stop yourself, you knock. You can hear the sound of his chair moving around before he suddenly swings the door open. He quickly looks you up and down, sighing before his lip twitches up on the left side. “Hello love, why aren't you watching the movie with the others?” He asks you, leaning against the door frame.

Without realising it, you'd been holding your breath. Suddenly you shakily exhale while looking up at his face, eyes scanning his features as if you hadn't seen him in months even though its only been a few hours. It really did feel like it's been that long though. “Oh.. I just wanted to come check on you.. Movie was boring and Jisung kept laughing so loud in my ears.” you lied, that's not really why you were here.

He stepped to the side, allowing you to enter the room before walking over to his chair and closing his laptop again. There it was again, the stinging pain in your chest. Normally if he ever shut his laptop like this, it meant you had his full attention but the past couple of times, it had felt like he doesn't trust you. It hurts.

“Well as you can see I'm fine but you can stay in here if you want to.” he says before turning his back to you, blocking your view of whatever is on his screen and placing his headphones back on. Fine? Is that what you'd call this sight? Because you don't think so. Which causes your next wrong moves. You start insisting that he take a break, use some eye drops, eat or drink something, stand up and stretch, the basic things he should do after sitting at a screen for hours.

The two of you begin to argue about it causing you to raise your voice a little in worry, your own anxiety flowing into the words without you realizing and neither does he. “If you're just going to lecture me and distract me from my work, you're more than welcome to leave.” he says a bit harshly, venom on his tongue. He doesn't even look at you before his fingers start to swim against his keys again, losing all interest in the fact that you, his girlfriend, is standing right there.

Your eyes sting as you walk out, shutting the door a bit harshly, grabbing the others in the living rooms attention. You fly through the room with your head down, not wanting anyone to see your tears, slipping on your shoes and out the front door after quickly grabbing your keys and coat. The others simply look at each other then back in the direction of Chans room.

It's now been two weeks since movie night and your fight with Chan and you aren't answering any texts you get from the members, fearing that it'll only make this pain worse. All you can think about is his voice the way he spoke to you that night. The way hes been acting towards you for whats just barely short of a month. Your thoughts are suddenly interrupted by the sound of your phone going off the rails. You look down not planning to answer but when the name pops up, your gaze softens. “Sungie Sweetie” is displayed with a silly photo of the boy. You didn’t want to answer but if anyone was as worked up about everything that suddenly happened, it'd be Jisung.

You sniffle as you watch it go to voicemail. The notification “10 missed calls from Sungie Sweetie” displays on the screen for the fifth time today alone. Before you can swipe away the notification, he's calling again. You rub your eyes before you decide to answer. Before you can even get out a hello, you hear his voice crack. “Oh my god you answered! Y/N its Jisung! Do you know how long I've been trying to get you to answer the phone? NO daily memes, no stupid comment mimics in my dms, NOTHING! Where are you? Are you-”

“Ji, you're rambling again.” you say with a small smile even though he can't see it. You can hear his shaky breath, before he begins to whisper. “You haven't answered anyone in days, as your best friend, that's not okay.” he says and you have to fight a giggle. “I’m okay Ji, I just.. Needed some time to myself.” you lie to him which causes guilt to fill your chest. You don't realise but he has the same feeling since he's not telling you the whole truth either.

You see, without your knowledge, you're currently on speaker where not only can Jisung hear you, so can Changbin who is biting his nails. Both of them have been worried sick about you after everyone had assumed you and Chan fought. That thought had been sealed when Chan came out of his room in a rough state, slamming doors and everything else that he opened, glares to everywhere in the dorms as if he's looking for something to soften his gaze on, on you.

Jisung clears his throat before he speaks, “So, when are you coming back over? I’ve got a couple of new games, Bin needs his hype man back, lix needs his taste tester, Minho needs someone to eat the extra food he makes, Seungmin complains that you're not here for him to bully, I.n says that you're the only person in this house that makes him genuinely laugh and Hyunjin has said, and I'm not even playing, ten times that he needs his muse back so he can continue his art.” 

He rambled about everything without even thinking about it, the room now filled by everyone he’d mentioned.  He looked around at everyone with a finger over his lips, signalling them to be quiet but as if they'd even speak, no one knows what to say. “Ji?..” they all hear that shake in your voice causing them all to look around at each other then quickly to him. “Yes love?” he says with no hesitation.

“You didn't… you didn't say Chan..” you say as the tears have begun to fall down your face like a waterfall of hot water. They could all hear you crying, no one knew what to do. You'd always hid your emotions. As their leaders girlfriend, you were just as head strong as he was, never showing what you actually felt unless behind closed doors. “Y/n… Chans been locked in either his room or the studio since you left. Changbin and I haven't been able to set foot in there without getting yelled at..”

The thought of Chan yelling at the people who care most for him saddens you more but it also really pisses you off. Before you even realise what you're doing, you've got shoes on and you're out your front door. The call with Jisung (and everyone else) does not end, it just becomes silent.

About 10 minutes go by and they all think that you've muted yourself for a cry but your voice suddenly rips through the room. “Sungie?” the fearful looks all shift to him as they hear the name, making Minho and I.n fight for their lives not to laugh. He looks at the floor and smiles “yes Y/Nie?” he replies quickly flipping the two now red in the face off.

“Come unlock the door, yeah?”

You're in the kitchen of the dorms as everyone surrounds you whispering so many questions to you but all you can do is look at Jisung and say “where is he?” before he slowly points to the hallway. You scuff as you wipe your nose and shake off your coat, hearing it hit the floor only for someone to pick it up and put it by the door.

Once in the hall, you make it to a door but you don’t knock or announce that you're walking inside, you just do it. “How dare you?” is all you can say before big brown eyes are looking at you. There's emotion in them and you can see the way that they shift from anger to surprise to guilt. He stares at you before slowly standing up, opening his mouth. “Don't you dare speak. I've got things to say, Christopher Bahng.”

“First of all, if your girlfriend leaves your dorm crying because of what you said to her, a decent boyfriend would TRY to follow her out to make sure shes okay. Second, don't EVER let me hear that you've YELLED at them simply because you're in a bad mood because of something you caused. Third, tell me why it's Ji that had to call me 50 times a day for TWO WEEKS to get me to come back. Do you know how much I've longed to see your name pop up on my phone Christopher?” 

By now you're crying without even noticing, your voice just barely above a shout until you realise Chan is staring at the floor. This only causes you to shake with emotion, “look at me!” you say, voice now a desperate shout, whole body shaking, eyes wide once his finally meet yours. You see the emotions switching over and over, the bright red where his eyes should be white, the bags and puffiness and you finally realise the way his whole body is shaking.

“Chan, I..” you start but he quickly cuts you off, his arms engulfing you into him as he pulls you both down to your knees on his bedroom floor, sobs filling the room. His whole body is shaking against you in what feels like frozen time, your hands instinctively finding his hair and rubbing his back as he cries and you do the same. The stress had finally broken the two of you only for you to break in front of the other. 

“Y/N.. I'm so so so sorry. Jisung told me everything when you left two weeks ago but I was so hyper focused on work that I neglected your feelings and noticing how you felt. I have no idea what was going through me or how it affected you but I know that I hurt you the other night when you were simply trying to help. That's why you're my light.” He says as he sobs into your neck, arms tightening around you, afraid you might push him away.

You turn your head towards the door to see the others all in the doorway after hearing you yell at their leader, the strongest guy they know now crying on the floor clinging to his girlfriend for what looked like dear life. When they see you looking at them, they quickly scurry away not wanting to ruin the moment that they all knew you both needed. “Channie.. sweetheart, look at me..” you say to him softly.

The pained look on his face makes your heart shatter as you use your sleeves to gently wipe away the tears that keep falling from his beautiful eyes. No matter how angry you are at him, seeing him like this still causes your heart to shatter into a hundred pieces. You push the wisps of hair out of his face and you let him cry as long as he needs to, feeling him relax after some time taking in deeper breaths.

“Y/n, please let's work through this. I messed up I know but I want to work on it, and if you say no then well I-” hes cut off quickly by your lips pressing into his, both of you letting out a shaky breath as you smile against his lips. “You big idiot.. I love you so much and I know that stress got the both of us, you don't need to apologise to me okay? Because everything that I did was no better.. Now I think we both need to take some time and just relax okay? Nothing but the two of us..”

He nods his head feverishly quick, eyes struggling to stay open, letting out a small laugh when he hears you speak. “You look like your body might crash the second I let you go.” “Can't sleep without you by my side.. Been getting maybe an hour or two of sleep a day.” is all that he can reply with before his eyes are closing lulling him to go to sleep right now.

After some convincing, he's taken a shower and you've changed his sheets, cleaned up all the trash in his room, organised his desk getting him a fresh warm towel and a clean set of clothes, you're both now curled in his bed. There's a movie playing on the tv but neither of you had paid any attention to it, too focused on the weight of being in each others arms.

You're playing with his hair while his head is laying on your chest, eyes closed as he's starting to finally feel his whole body relax, the stress you were both feeling only an hour ago now completely gone. There's a small hum that escapes him causing you to look down at him, met by a sleepy smile.

“I love you, Y/n, so much.”

“I love you too Channie, so much more.”

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