Constantine & Holly Tbt - Tumblr Posts

                If    her    heart    were    in    working    order,    it    would    break.    Break    into    a    million    little    pieces    and    she    KNOWS    she’ll    be    left    to    pick    up    them    up    on    her    own.    Men    like    him    who    are    loved    by    women    like    her    don’t    get    their    happy    ending.    Especially    not    when    they’re    terminally    ill.    What    a    joke,    she    dies,    gets    brought    back    to    life,    and    now    he’s    dying.    But    he    won’t    be    as    lucky    as    her,    she    thinks.

                Let    her    be    selfish.    Because    she’s    going    to    be    regardless    of    what    the    warlock    says.    But    his    words    do    cause    her    brows    to    furrow    and    a    frown    to    form    on    lips.    He    was    always    so    fucking    stubborn.

                “    I    didn’t    ask    if    you    were    good    for    me,    John.    To    be    quite    honest,    I    don’t    care    if    you    are    or    aren’t.    I    just    want    you.    “

                Eyes    stare    at    his    form    now,    sounding    like    an    asthmatic    who    needed    their    inhaler.    That’s    something    she    doesn’t    have    to    worry    about    anymore.    Holly    has    half    a    mind    to    reach    into    her    bag    and    grab    her    inhaler    for    him.    She    doesn’t,    only    because    she’s    unsure    if    it’ll    help.

                Holly    wants    to    point    out    what    he    did    for    her.    How    he    helped    her    regain    feeling,    both    emotional    and    physical,    and    she’s    not    just    a    thought    piloting    a    meat    mech    anymore.    How    HE    gave    HER    purpose    again.    But,    she’s    reminded    of    the    payment    he    was    given.    Fuck,    she    doesn’t    care    about    it.    About    how    they    met,    or    if    he    didn’t    do    it    for    pity,    no.    All    she    cares    about    is    being    in    his    arms.

                “    Is    it    because    I’m    no    longer    human    that    you    deny    yourself    this    ??    “

@thehollyverse (holly) said: "I should tell you that I think of you each night."

the words send a chill down his spine, a rare feat these days. instincts tell him to turn & run in the opposite direction, panic settling in the pit of his stomach until it feels like bile about to come back up. feet remain firmly planted on the ground despite his better judgement, & brown eyes lift to meet holly's gaze: SILENCE is deafening while fingers itch for the pack of smokes tucked away in his pocket. he doesn't move though, only forces oxygen into his lungs [ as well as he can ] until pain blooms in his chest, the wheeze that follows the only sound that breaks through the air.

one breath, & he doesn't say a word. two breaths, & he blinks, nice & slow. three breaths, & he swallows around nothing. four breaths, & he finally speaks. ❛ don't say that. ❜ a warning or a request? who knew. constantine certainly didn't. FEELINGS were something he'd always thought were best left unspoken — things he felt for holly were complicated, & he certainly refused to put a name to any of them. even if it meant her walking away, even if it meant dying without ever admitting a damn thing. he shouldn't have encouraged any of this when he's a dead man walking. ❛ i'm no good for you. ❜

* MEME, always accepting.