Everyone's Ineffable Romance Is Just Around The Corner - Tumblr Posts

just want to let you know that you and phoenix are making me feel lonely rn,

how do I get my own phoenix?

I initially wanted to blow off this question with a "lol i wrote porn" answer, and while that's true, I'd like to give you something far more sincere.

I took a terrifying leap of faith.

I entered a fandom I was SO FUCKING SCARED of interacting with instead of lurking on the sidelines. I chose to branch out from my itty bitty corner of the internet and post a story that I almost deleted in a moment of panic. In this story, I bore my soul. UTSS might just be a silly Good Omens AU to most, but the majority of its heart is my history, my hurt, my experience. I put myself out there, not looking for anyone or anything more than community, and by some fucking miracle, she took notice in me. And I'm forever grateful.

I think all of this is to say: do what you're afraid of. It was and is terrifying, even still, make no mistake. You have to be vulnerable to allow anyone in. So put even a small sliver of your beautiful self into the world. Even if you only see every part of you as jagged or boring or unworthy. Someone will notice. someone will think it's the most awe-inspiring soul that ever existed and will want to handle it with care. Also, be prepared to act the fool. You have to be okay with going out on a limb, even if the result isn't great (citing examples: @phoen1xr0se leaving a very thorough comment that I was too dumb to recognize for what it was; or me needing to blatantly tell her I had a Big Gay Crush™ on her for her to realize). You also have to throw a lot of caution to the wind, if I'm honest. How else could two people from opposite sides of the world find their way to one another?

It may not happen tomorrow, or even next month, and it might not work every time, but when I thought someone couldn't look at me with anything more than derision or disdain, I was proven so fucking wrong. Don't lose hope.