Incorrect Hp Quotes - Tumblr Posts
The Houses As Things My Friends Have Said
Gryffindor: "Is this water? It smells like water."
Ravenclaw: "I would really like to like nature, but nature just doesn't like me. And it's terrible."
Hufflepuff: "Someday you'll see me and I'll have my cat in a baby swing."
Slytherin: "I’ve just lost all will to care about people’s feelings. Like unless we’re super close, I could care less how my words hurt you."
Slytherin Headcanon
Gets banned from public parks because they endlessly rant to random kids on the playground when their friends refuse to listen anymore.
Ravenclaw: Huff, we need to talk.
Hufflepuff: About what?
Ravenclaw: Your online shopping addiction.
Hufflepuff: I do not have an addiction!
Ravenclaw: You're literally out of money! You spent it all on fandom tees!
Hufflepuff: What do you mean I'm out of money? I only bought 73!
Ravenclaw: My point exactly.
Ravenclaw: I'm not much of a dog person.
Hufflepuff: I just, I don't really agree with that.
Hufflepuff: “Bro?”
Gryffindor: “Yeah, bro?”
Hufflepuff: “I love you, bro.”
Gryffindor, affectionately: “Bro.”
Ginny: Two years ago today, I married my best friend.
Ginny: Harry is still mad about it, but Luna and I were drunk and thought it was funny.
Voldemort: I’m in a constant crisis where I can’t decide whether to get my life together or my tumblr page together.
I would love to be a plant, photosynthesising seems pretty cool.
— Neville Longbottom
Eating Mexican food on my piano may not have been the best idea, but a lot of things that happen on my piano are not good ideas.
— Ravenclaw
Ron: Do you ever wonder if you’re the bad guy in someone else’s story?
Harry: Dude, I’m the bad guy in my own story.
Incorrect HP Quotes #1
Hermione: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me.
Ron: Okay, but in my defense, Harry bet me 5 galleons I couldn't drink all that shampoo.
Hermione: That's not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!?!
Incorrect HP Quote #2
Ginny: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys.
Hermione: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!
Harry: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies' eyes!!
Ron: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.
Ginny: If you touch my birthday cake I'll make you eat your hands.
Incorrect HP Quote #2
Ginny: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys.
Hermione: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!
Harry: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies' eyes!!
Ron: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.
Ginny: If you touch my birthday cake I'll make you eat your hands.
Incorrect HP Quote #3
Ginny: I'm kind of crushing on someone, but I'm worried about telling you who it is, because you're not going to like it.
Ron: Just rip the bandage off.
Ginny: It's Harry.
Ron: Put the bandage back on.
(if you think i should switch harry and ginny, let me know, cause it might work better but idk)
Incorrect HP Quote #3
Ginny: I'm kind of crushing on someone, but I'm worried about telling you who it is, because you're not going to like it.
Ron: Just rip the bandage off.
Ginny: It's Harry.
Ron: Put the bandage back on.
(if you think i should switch harry and ginny, let me know, cause it might work better but idk)
Incorrect HP Quote #4
Hermione: This is such a bad idea.
Ginny: Then why are you coming along?
Hermione: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
Incorrect HP Quote #5
Draco: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Hermione: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Harry: I got distracted halfway through.
Ron: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
Incorrect HP Quote #6
Draco: HELP! I TOLD HERMIONE I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!
Ginny, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
Incorrect HP Quote #6
Draco: HELP! I TOLD HERMIONE I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!
Ginny, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
Incorrect HP Quote #7
Hermione: What did you guys get in your yearbook?
Luna: 'Prettiest Smile'
Neville: 'Nicest Personality'
Harry: 'Mostly likely to start a bar fight'
Ginny: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'