Jjba Kars - Tumblr Posts
Pillar men x Chubby!reader that acts sweet but could kill them
TW:Offensive comments of body,fat shaming (If this makes you uncomfy please tell me)(You kinda react like Josuke when someone insults his hair)(Ill edit this when i finish battle tendency so i can write the others)
Kars
You guys where out at night going to a river to have a date but the you guys see some girls swimming in there,you where going to tell them if they could leave.
“Hey girls could you leave me and my boyfriend were going to have a date here”you say
“Why would we let a fat pig in this river and maybe your boyfriend is not looking at pigs but at us”the girls say
Kars was getting annoyed and was about to kill them but you did something he did not expect from you
“What the hell did you just say about my body”you say with an aura surrounding you
“What are you deaf to fatt-”they girls were about to say
You starts beating them up,and making them all bloody and surrounded with an aura that even scared Kars a little
“Well now run along girls,unless you want more”you say
The girls start running away all bloodied up
“Now Kars we should set up our date now”you say with a happy aura
Kars later relized you could beat him up and never want you to get angry at him
Why do everyday I wake up and start simping for these people,(ps.I think ill open headcannons for part 1 to 3 of jojo)
Sweet Child
Kars x Child!reader (platonic)
Tw: Child death,some kinda angst???
Word count: 656
Long ago Kars adopted a human child that was from a hamon tribe that had gotten lost and was not scared of him but curious .This child was named (y/n),they were born with curiosity .(Y/n) was always exploring and that was the reason why they got lost. You had accidently found the place the pillar men were camping and was hiding behind a tree watching them. Kars was the one who noticed them first seeing your (h/c) and (e/c) at night. He then went to the tree you were and hid. When you went to peak again you had noticed one was missing and then heard his voice. “So you're the presence I felt” Kars says looking down at you. You jumped a little and turned around slowly,now staring up at him. “I didn't mean to stare at you mr, I just got curious of you since you're different than others” you say with your big colored eyes staring at him with curiosity. Kars was surprised you were not scared of him but curious of him, he then decided to ask you where your parents were. “Little one, where are your parents?” Kars asked you. You then put your index finger on your lips as you think. You then realized that you were lost and went too far into the forest. You drop your head in despair as you tell the man. “I got lost” you say with a sad voice. “Well I could help you but tell me your name first,child.” Kars says crouched to reach your level. You raise your head as you say your name. “My name is (y/n),what's yours mr?” (y/n) ask. Kars thinks about it and says his name. “My name is Kars,” He says with pride.
A few weeks passed and (y/n) was still with Kars,he taught them how to catch fish and hunt animals.(Y/n) parents were neglectful to them so (y/n) say Kars as a father figure.One time you were being tucked by Kars and you had called him papa as you fell asleep.Kars had been surprised you had called him papa but he never asked you for this.A few days later while at night looking for berries,you had found you home,the tribe.Your parents were happy that you came back but you had asked them who they were. “(Y/n),we are your parents” they said as you stared them at them shocked.Kars knew you were away for a long time so he went to find you and saw you were by a tribe.Your parents noticed him and screamed about a pillarmen.You were scared and confused and then saw Kars.You removed your parents arm around you and ran to Kars,hugging him. “Papa!” you said as you ran to Kars ,hiding you face in his leg.Kars then crouched and hugged you. The tribe had come to see the comotion of your parents screaming and then seeing Kars. “A pillar men is attacking that child!”Had screamed someone from the hamon tribe. Some of the hamon warriors had swords and spears to attack the pillar men with. One went to attack Kars but you stood in front of the weapon and it went into through you,blood falled from you mouth as you closed your eyes and dying in front of Kars. Kars held your dead body with anger and tears. “You fools,you dare to attack me and then you kill my child” Kars yelled as he looked at them filled with rage,he had killed everybody in that tribe. After the slaughter of the tribe, Kars went to your body and took it to a flower field and placed your body there. Kars was sure of something he would kill all,and become the perfect being to make this world perfect for you.
Pillar Men Incorrect Quotes
Kars: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?
Esidisi: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.
Wamuu: I personally was created in a lab.
Santana: I just straight up spawned lol.
___________________________________
Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Kars: Shit.
Esidisi: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Wamuu: OH MY GOD SANTANA FELL OFF!!!
____________________________________
Kars: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Esidisi: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Kars: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING WAMUU WITH ME
Santana, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
____________________________________
Kars: I think we're missing something.
Esidisi: Teamwork?
Wamuu: Cohesion?
Santana: A general sense of what we’re doing?
____________________________________
Kars: *Screams*
Esidisi: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Wamuu: Should we do something?
Santana: No, I want to see who wins.
____________________________________
Kars: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Esidisi: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Wamuu: I got distracted about halfway through.
Santana: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
____________________________________
Kars: Dammit, Esidisi!
Esidisi: What?! It wasn’t me!
Kars: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Wamuu!
Wamuu: Not me either.
Kars: Oh...Then who set the house on fire?
Santana: *whistles*
____________________________________
Kars: I prevented a murder today.
Esidisi: Really? How’d you do that?
Kars: self control.
____________________________________
Kars: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though.
Esidisi: You need to stop.
____________________________________
Wamuu: Santana was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.
Santana: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.
Wamuu: Santana, you ate a chair.
____________________________________
Wamuu: What are your goals?
Santana: To pet all the dogs.
Wamuu: No, fitness goals.
Santana: To be able to run fast enough to pet all the dogs.
Since you guys liked the first one so much, ill do some more!
PILLAR MEN QUOTES (PART 2)
Wamuu: Joseph, my old friend!
Joseph: I think you tried to kill me at some point.
Wamuu: That was obviously just my way of getting to know you.
Joseph: YOU CHEATED!
Caesar: So did my dad, but hey, my mom knew it all and even sorted out their wedding, so what’s the problem?
Esidisi: I… can confirm that that actually happened.
Joseph: …What.
Kars: When I said bring me something back from the beach I meant like a conch shell!
Santana: *Struggling to hold a seagull* Fucking say that next time!
Esidisi: Don't go to the kitchen.
Joseph: Why?
Esidisi: I saw a spider.
Joseph: Well, did you kill it?
Esidisi: It has 8 arms and I only have 2, it's not fair...
Santana: Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
Santana: I need my socks.
Santana: *cocks gun* Go to Bed. This is no longer a request, This is now a Threat.
Santana: *writing a letter*
Santana: Dear Santa,
I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty...
And it was worth it you fat, judgemental bastard.
Wamuu: And I’d love to be sorry for that, but we all know I’ve done much, much worse.
Esidisi, fighting Joseph: Clownery. Tomfoolery. Absolute fuckery, I am going to revoke your life privileges.
Kars: I am literally evil incarnate.
Kars: I’m not actually, I just enjoy being evil.
Kars: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because I’m making a conscious effort.
Joseph, looking at their watch: It has been 2 hours and sixteen minutes since I’ve been insulted.
Joseph, looking at Kars: It’s been about 5 seconds since I’ve been assaulted, but let’s not talk about that.
Esidisi: Now, the recipe calls for 2 shots of vodka.
Esidisi: *upends the bottle*
Kars: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.
Santana: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.
Joseph: The last time I went to an urgent care clinic, I checked off 'excessive crying' on the symptom list, and then the nurse got really confused and said that was meant for babies.
Kars: You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol.
Caesar, about Joseph: My expectations are low, but they can always go lower.
Kars: I'm allergic to death.
Wamuu: You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon.
Wamuu: It's me.
Wamuu: I just found out that humans are capable of fitting a light bulb into their mouth with ease but can’t take it out without shattering it, and now I have to physically restrain myself from putting a light bulb in my mouth.
Joseph: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.
Wamuu: My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.
Santana: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.
Kars: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Kars lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
Wamuu: Not to be nsfw but I want someone to hold me while I sleep.
(( I'll hold you Wamuu! ☺ If you want to see more of these or personal HCs for the Pillar Men, feel free to ask me! ))
Stoner Kira:Good,Bad And Neutral Ending
(Content Warning:Drugs,death,suicide)
Good ending:
Dio and Valentine scold Kira for his addiction and for once Kira decides to listen.He accepts their advice and decides to seek therapy and tells Diavolo never to give him drugs again.He finds happiness through cats (which he bonds with Kars by) and never needs to go back to drugs.
Neutral ending:
Pucci eventually decided enough is enough and sends Kira to rehab to better himself.He stays there for 4 months and leaves…unhappy.It’s not that Kira necessarily misses the drugs,but he misses how they wouldn’t make him feel empty.
Bad ending:
(SUICIDE WARNING)
Diavolo realises how drugs aren’t making Kira happier so he stops supplying Kira.Even though he knew Kira was going through a hard time,he refused to sell to Kira.What he didn’t realise though was the drugs were the only reason Kira was alive,and so one day he decided to end his life due to his constant impulsive thoughts and crave for emotions.Everyone wishes they could’ve helped him,but Diavolo just feels guilty.
Alright new headcanon.In the villain house neighbourhood Morioh,there’s a strange amount of old ladies that live there.They all trash talk the other old ladies and smell strongly of burnt lavender.
And Kars is friends will all of them.They’re like his second family (he likes some of them more than Santana)Oh yeah and all of them tried to fight Dio and Dio had to forfeit because Giorno was there and he didn’t want his dad to beat up a bunch of old ladies.
How JJBA Villains Would Tell You That You Smell:
(This is ooc but idc)
Dio:”What is foul stench?Is it you?”
Kars:”Wash yourself or you will never be as perfect as me”
Kira:”When was the last time you had a shower?You smell weird.”
Diavolo:”Don’t speak to me unless you go clean yourself”
Doppio:”Hey I’m not trying to be rude,but I can smell something bad and I think it’s you”
Pucci:”Do you need to wash yourself?Theres a strange smell to you”
Valentine:”What makes you think you can come near me smelling like a rotting corpse?Find a body of water and clean yourself.”
Kars
Important! I tried my best to find reliable sources for Aztec/Mexica culture. One of my main sources was Coyolxauhqui, the moon goddess and the beautiful stone relief that presents her. Using her as inspiration for bells in Karss hair and the headdress. I limited my palette thats why there is no green in the drawing, a choice i made fully aware that the feathers of a quetzals bird are emerald green.
I gave Kars straight bangs to incorporate aztec hairstyles, he is holding the stone masc from jojo slightly styalized to resemble the rounded rectangular shapes used in aztec artwork. I also colored the mask, as a lot of sculptures and reliefs from anchient times were painted, and it would give the masc an even more striking look.
Behind Kars is a record (very choppily drawn sorry) which is based of real drawings but is improvised by me to present the stone masc, young Kars, the sun and Quetzalcoatl as a serpent.
You're welcome to scrutinise my work if you want, im open for constructive criticizm espechially around the cultural aspect.
I have yet to (fully) regain my artistic abilities so more writing for @starry-blue-echoes little Villain house/Villain Peanut Gallery Au ( X )
So running with the idea suggested in their post that this is a little room with manga and DVDs of the jostars adventures and what not, do ya think they all read/Watch their respective parts and scoff with little commentaries about how "so THATS where they were hiding!!" "No WONDER they were able to get to my mansion so easily! I employed useless minions!" Or even "that's not how it went at all!"
Another thought would be about Kars and Pucci, ofc the others too but, the Manga and animes respectively have flashbacks and, more specifically for Kars, family on video and what not. So I like the mental image of Kars (or like pucci or maybe Dio-) just sitting there in the dark room for hours on end watching and rewinding scenes. Kars smiling to himself as he watches Wamuu kick Joseph's butt, or pucci sitting and crying in quiet solitude as he torments himself with these images of his family (sure he has white snakes but it's not the same-).
Idk lol, I think its neat. Can't stop thinking about their posts smh smh
Also a silly little doodle <3, I have more planned >:)
Inspired <3
Dio has definitely made the mistake of trying to insult Esidisi or whamu and Santana and that is a mistake-
(Referencing another post I made about kars watching and crying about poor Esidisi's death in the peanut gallery villain expansion)
Dio getting bullied by Kars would be so funny
You've summed up their entire relationship in the Villain House-
just. Dio is acting like his regular assholey self and Kars is having none of it. He could not give less of a shit but the second Dio make it his problem his absolutely curbstomps him in retaliation
almost every interaction between them is Dio trying to fight him and Kars either ignoring him entirely or showing him exactly why he was the only one here who wasn't technically dead
May I order headcannons about the Yan Villains reacting to their s/o escaping only to find out that their s/o was only going out to McDonald’s or sum shit lmao and coming back “home”?
LOL I love this idea! Just goes so well with the mess that villain house is
warnings: mentions of manipulation and death, stalking
Dio
Dio feels hurt and betrayed that darling would escape. Tbh, he thought they were a bit too oblivious to even realize what their situation is.
He truly thought darling would never escape. Dio was too comfortable with his life with them.
But immediately after feeling hurt, he'll hunt them down.
If it's during the day, then Vanilla Ice and Terrence will have to do it. But at night, he'll take it upon himself to look for darling
He's thinking of all the punishments he'll have ready for darling. As cute as they are to him, he can't allow this behaviour to be repeated in the future
When darling comes home revealing they were at McDonald's the whole time and brought back food for the villains, Dio will be dumbfounded lol
He'll think darling is messing with him and not take it seriously, but when darling holds up the McDonald's bag, he'll feel like an idiot
Dio chastises darling for leaving without telling him or asking for his company. Kinda emotional manipulating darling and guilt-tripping them. This is just his little revenge for making him feel abandoned
Kars
Kinda like Dio except with more self-control and composure
At first, he'll be alarmed by darling's lack of presence. Something is wrong. Where is darling?
When he can't find them then he'll have the other Pillar Men help look for them
Kars won't worry too much because unlike Dio, he actually trusts darling. And being all-knowing, he knows darling would never leave forever, but he still worries and wants to see his darling
Instead of darling coming back home, he'll find them out at McDonald's
A bit surprised but not really a the fact that they're there. Kars will start interogatting them and asking all these questions, but in the end is glad to see darling's face again.
When both darling and Kars reach home, Kars will try and hog darling all to himself by keeping them on his lap~
Kira
Stalkerish vibes
When he can't find darling, he will immediately think its cuz they escaped
Stalker mode activated!
He's like a private investigator on the hunt for a missing persons lol
He'll track down every clue you left behind
Doesn't rely on other villains since they'll just get in the way
Kira is smart and knows the villains can't possibly be accomplices. As much as he doesn't like them, he can come to turns that they all yearn for darling and would NEVER try to let darling escape
He'll take the day off of work just to find darling
When he tracks darling down to the McDonald's, he'll be standing there like: 😐
Will suggest you two hold hands when walking back home to villain house so this doesn't ever happen again
His hold on darling's hand is stronger than usual...
Diavolo
The brooding type
When he notices darling is gone, he automatically thinks its cuz they escaped.
He's a paranoid so there's chance he will send out orders to his mafia to search for you
But just when he's about to send out the orders and have the entire surrounding area under lockdown, darling comes in with a bag of fries and burger in their hands
"Hi Diavolo! I bought you some nuggets!" darling says all cheerily
Diavolo will feel belittled and mocked. He can't believe darling did this!
He was ready to lay it all down. Planned out everything from start to finish. How he would find you. What he would do when he does. All for it for naught cuz darling's obliviousness overpowers King Crimson
"Are you mocking me, y/n?" he asks
Darling: "Turn that frown upside down! I bought you their happy meal toys too!"
Doppio
Poor baby boy is worried sick about darling that he can't think straight!
He'll begin to think of all the catastrophic things that could happen to you while you're out and he's not there for you
His dark side will come out and it's an internal battle with himself
Evil Doppio will be pissed at darling. How dare they try to leave! How dare they betray his trust and love after all they've been through together! He'll kill them!
But Good Doppio will try to give darling the benefit of the doubt and argue that darling must be out getting groceries and will be back soon
Doppio is caught in between these crossovers and cannot decide what to do.
Diavolo is the only one he trusts to tell about his missing darling, and ofc Diavolo just sides with evil Doppio
Darling comes home to a Diavolo egging an evil Doppio on, but when Doppio makes eye contact with darling, he'll revert back to his old sweet and loving self
"y/n! There you are! I missed you~"
Pucci
Pucci is calm and collected
At least, he tries to be
He'll try not to overthink it. But with darling, he can't help it
He really thought he got darling wrapped up in his finger. But looks like its the other way around when HE'S the one falling apart over darling missing
He will have White Snake investigate the matter and while his stand is busy doing that, Pucci will begin to count in prime numbers to calm himself of any worries over darling
When darling comes back, he'll give a smile and be thankful to God that darling is alright and didn't leave him
But just to be sure, he'll implant a disk that writes darling can'r leave the house anymore without informing him
but after every step, there is another, there’s fire behind the wall of ice. but after every breath, there is another, if there’s anyone left alive.
Heyo, Me Again! Could I Maybe Request A Part 2 To That Jojo Characters x Morbid! Himbo! Reader I Requested Awhile Back? This Time With Weather, Kars, And Rohan?
No Pressure And It's Totally Chill If You'd Rather Not Do Repeats Or Anythin! Hope You Have A Rad Day, Yoski! 👈🐻👈
JoJo Characters with a Morbid! Himbo! Reader: Part 2
Featuring: Weather Report, Kars, Rohan Kishibe
No problem anon!! Usually I max out repeat prompts like this when it hits 3 parts, so you're good!!
Kars
- He loves keeping you around just for the pure entertainment you give him
- Usually he has no time for less than bright humans, especially if you're clumsy or if you forget things easily
- But you? The man that could describe in detail about how rattlesnake venom can rot off the limb that it bit just for the fun of it? Oh he's keeping you around
- In all honesty, Kars isn't too impressed by your little fun facts. He's lived a long life, done just about anything you could think of
- You'll try your best to unnerve him and it's entertaining to see you not grasp his "accomplishments"
- "Human sacrifices? Really, human? I was seen as a god among men, thousands have been slaughtered in my name. Try harder next time."
Rohan Kishibe
- Oh yeah no doubt this man has used Heaven's Door on you without you knowing
- Literally you are an enigma to him. It's frustrating but you pull him back in with your golden retriever like charm
- He's so used to scaring others off so that they'd leave him alone, whether by his intense stare or eating insects
- But you barely reacted. Dare I say you laugh at his attempt to get you off of his porch.
- Since then he's learned to genuinely enjoy your company !!
- He's learned to appreciate your sweet moments, smile at your dumb moments, and he makes sure to get a notebook out whenever you have a horrifying "what if" thought
Weather Report
- Yeah out of this list he's the most unphased
- Just a thing that happens when you're Anasui's mediator, he holds him back at his most violent. You having a weird idea or fun fact isn't going to shake him
- However you might get a side eye if you laugh at something at the wrong time
- Omg head empty just thinking about you bringing Weather venomous spider or snake from the courtyard and showing it off to him
- Apart of him enjoys hearing you talk and ramble, but also he wants to slap out whatever is in your hand because you picked up a dangerous animal without a thought behind your eyes
- Remember when it was raining poisonous frogs? He isn't one to believe in miracles but the fact you didn't die during that proved him wrong
Big sister figure Doppio being so gentle and caring to any younger children while still experiencing top tier girl rage behind a gentle smile, while the others are just giant buff assholes ready to fuck you up/fuck up the Joestars while still “calm” LMAO
Maid Karzuuu
Accurate
Pillar men: Ass, tits, chub, or thighs
Kars
All thighs for the being. He loves the feeling of your soft thighs as he gropes and nuzzle into your thighs.
Esidisi
I could imagine him as an ass man. No matter how big your ass is he is all over you. He will smack your ass when you walk by or if he sees you bending over to get something.
Wamuu
Tits for this man. He likes to lay on those soft melons after he has had a hard training day or if he just wants to relax. Sometimes if you listen close enough, you can hear him purr as he nuzzles into your boobs.
Santana
He is a chubby chaser. If you have a soft tummy, he will be all over you. He likes to nuzzle into your stomach when the other pillarmen have gotten on his last nerve.
Finally back again but had art block so did this
