Jungkook Comfort - Tumblr Posts

We all have our issues | Prologue

idol!jungkook x chubby!student!reader

Summary : She asked me if she was pretty.

Well, it’s clear that the girl’s a fraud.

There's really no way of winning

If in their eyes you'll always be a dumb blonde

Words : 900

Warnings : mommy issues, daddy issues, age gap (Jk is 25 while reader is 20), crying, talk about anxiety, depression, abuse, mentions of panic attacks, school induced stress, fear of dogs (?), insecurities, body shaming.

You grab the cherry and coke flavored candies on the shelf and throw them into the red basket you’re holding with your arm. You then readjust your glasses and head towards the ramen aisle, you take a box of your favorite ramen along with a box of two soft boiled eggs. You ponder for a few moments before deciding to get a spicy salmon gimbap. When checking out the seaweed snacks, you notice a tall man dressed in black sweatpants and a large Nike shirt hesitating between two flavors.

He’s humming a soft tune which sound familiar, but your tiredness doesn’t allow you to remember exactly what it is. You sigh and go pay before setting down your stuff at the counter while you go heat up the ramen. The ringing from the microwave stops you up from almost falling asleep standing up, and you carefully take out your bowl to bring it to the counter. Slowly, you take out your laptop as well as your notebook from your bag to work on your philosophy paper. About ten minutes in your essay, you see from the corner of your eyes a black bag hesitantly being set down.

“Do you mind if I sit here ?” The man from earlier asks. He stares at you and the notes you have before grabbing his bag and taking a few steps back. “If you’re working, I can go somewhere else.” He points at the other seats available, but you shake your head no and gesture for him to sit. You wipe your teary eyes and turn away from him so he couldn’t see the state you were in.

However, that doesn’t look like it worked, because he seems to have noticed, because he hesitantly puts his hand on your shoulder. “I don’t mean to be rude, but, are you okay ?”

You blink at him and look around nervously before answering. “Yeah.”

You wished you could’ve said more, but it felt like you had already said too much. You now fully turn away, so he couldn’t ask you anymore questions, and take a bite of your noodles. The ramen burn your tongue and you blame your upcoming tears on the spice, this time you don’t stop them, and let them fall freely on your lap. You attempt to muffle your cries by shoving more food into your mouth, but to no avail.

Truth is, you were having a pretty good day, one of your classes got cancelled so you got to hang out with some friends, you had lunch together and laughed. And then your mother surprised you. You get along well with her, but sometimes she can be a lot. She had been at your apartment o when you’d came home and it was fun, until she said stuff that bothered you. When you told her you had a great time with friends, she criticized them, and said you should be focused on studies, when you told her you got an amazing grade on an English paper, she asked how much everyone else had.

In the end, you answered that it didn’t matter, because you were proud of your grade, she got mad at you and called you rude, amongst other names. After her whole outburst, she had suddenly decided to be friendly and offered to cook you something so you could relax and watch your favorite show together. For the first time you tried to stand up to her, and you told her you didn’t feel like hanging out today, but she only just laughed at your face, until she realized you were serious. Then, she got even angrier and left, slamming the door like an antsy teenager behind her. You didn’t even bother cleaning up everything she took out and just grabbed your bag before heading to the convenience store. You saw the man next to you steal glances at you every few minutes, and you started to feel bad because he was just being nice and you had ignored him. When you saw him hesitate to ask you if you were okay once more, you turned to face him.

“I’m sorry, sir. I’m just… not really having a great day. But I’m fine, don’t worry.” You wiped your under eyes with the back of your hand.

“Sir ?” He giggled, and you quite frankly thought it was the cutest thing you had ever heard. “I’m sorry you had a bad day. That really sucks. D-Do you want to talk about it ?” He saw your eyes start to wander around so he assumed he was being too intrusive and turned back to his own food. “You don’t have to. I’m sorry.”

“No I’m sorry. You’re being really nice, and I’m just being lame. Even if I wanted to talk about it, I don’t really know what I would tell you, to be honest.”

“How about we just eat ? And if by the end of your meal, you want to talk, I’ll be here.” He offered you, smiling kindly.

“Okay, that’d be nice. Thank you…” You trailed off, waiting for him to introduce himself.

“Jungkook.” He saw the way your face dropped and looked around to see if anything had bothered you or made you sad, but then he heard you whisper to him.

“I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, but I really like your music.”

“Oh, well thank you…”

“___”

We all have our issues | Jungkook

idol!jungkook x chubby!student!reader

Summary : She asked me if she was pretty

Well, it's clear that the girl's a fraud

There's really no way of winning

If in their eyes you'll always be a dumb blonde.

Series warnings : mommy issues, daddy issues, age gap (Jk is 25 while reader is 20), crying, talk about anxiety, depression, abuse, mentions of panic attacks, school induced stress, fear of dogs (?), insecurities, body shaming.

List of Chapters :

Prologue

Chapter one : you sleep over at Jungkook’s for the first time, and realize that, you do, indeed, see him as more than a friend.

Chapter two : you ask Jungkook to go grocery shopping with you, but the day doesn’t end as nicely as it had started.

Chapter three : family reunions had never really been your things after all.

We all have our issues | Chapter 1

idol!jungkook x chubby!student!reader

Summary : you sleep over at Jungkook’s for the first time, and realize that you do, indeed, see him as more than a friend.

Words : 2,147

Warnings : age gap (Jk is 25 while oc is 20), anxiety, skin picking, fear of dogs (?), insecurities.

Notes : jk’ s whipped and has her as “baby” in his phone, oc’s anxious even when everything’s fine, but she’s cute and has skincare so she’s happy, she’s also whipped. And she loves Bam.

JK🎸

i’ll be here in five

i’m here

You put your phone in the pocket of your jacket and grab your keys from the counter before heading out and locking the door behind you. A smile etched onto your face when you saw your friend dressed in an all black outfit, just like you and waved shyly at him.

“Hi.”

“Hey, how’re you ?”

“Good. Nervous.”

He put his arm around you and rubbed your shoulder. “Don’t be, my son’s a good boy.”

“I’m sure he is. I just get a little nervous around dogs.” The elevator opened so you both walked in and clicked the lobby button so you could get out of the building. Tonight was going to be your first time at Jungkook’s place, you’d quickly became friends after your first meeting, and you’d been talking for a few weeks. Whenever you hung out, it was either at your apartment, or small parks and places he knew. You really wanted this to go well, so you’d gotten a really cute outfit, even though you were a bit nervous about wearing it out, you still opted for it after a sudden hit of confidence. You had a skin tight black Calvin Klein shirt, low rise black jeans and chunky black sneakers, all that covered by an oversized black jean jacket. While waiting for the elevator to stop, you fiddled with your hoop earring, pulling and twisting at it, when you felt Jungkook’s hand on yours, stopping your movements.

“You’re gonna hurt yourself.” You quickly pulled your hand away and looked down, embarrassed.

“Right…”

The elevator dinged, and your eyes almost came out of your skull when you reached the black Mercedes car. It was definitely not something you could afford, or had ever been in. The tattooed man opened the door and winked at you before closing it and doing a cute walk back to his side of the car.

You put your seatbelt on and giggled when he sat down behind the wheel and turned on the LED lights a bright pink.

“I like your car, it’s cool.”

“Yeah, I’m thinking of getting a motorcycle, though.” He said, waiting for your opinion.

“They’re so dangerous.” The way his face fell physically made your heart ache, so you quickly continued. “But it would be pretty amazing, you’d look really cool. Plus, I know you’re careful.”

“Yeah, you’ve got to be with these things.”

The rest of the ride was filled with laughter and singing, mainly his, because you didn’t dare to try and sing in front of him. Turns out his apartment is a lot further away from yours than you thought, you noticed it is closer to your university though. Jungkook even offered to pick you up sometimes, so you wouldn’t have to take the bus, and you had accepted, only after making him promise it didn’t bother him. Once you were in front of Jungkook’s apartment door, he slowly turned to you and took your hands in his, bringing heat to your face.

“Okay. This is it. My humble little home.”

“Humble little home, huh ?” You teased.

“Yep.” He unlocked the door and let you walk in first. When he stepped behind, he looked around and took notice of his Doberman staring at you from his bedroom’s door frame.

He let out a laugh and called him over. “Bam ! Come here !” The dog happily hurried to his owner’s legs with wiggly tail and ears. “Okay, this…” He turned Bam’s head so he could get a good look at you. “Is my friend, ___. She’s real nice, so don’t scare her off.” You smiled and kneeled so you could let the dog sniff you. Ban walked to you and nudged your knee with his nose before raising his head and rubbing it against your tummy. “Hi Bam.” He barked softly at you, making you gasp and scratch behind his ear. “You’re such a nice boy, aren’t you ?”

“So… let me show you around.” Jungkook took a hold of your hand and guided you to the living area. “This is the living room. I guess…” The apartment made you laugh, it looked like a student apartment, light walls empty of any decorations, an empty hanger racks next to the couch, which was way too large to belong to a student. However, there was also workout gear right next to the television, which also looked really expensive. “The kitchen. We can cook something, or order out. Whatever you want.”

“Oh. Whatever’s best for you, I’m not complicated or anything.” You shrugged anxiously.

“___. Do you want to order out ? If not, I’ll cook something for you, I’m pretty good.”

“I swear, I don’t care.” As long as it doesn’t inconvenience him, you’d eat whatever.

“We’ll order out then.” He settled.

“Great.” Thank god you brought your wallet with you.

You ended up ordering two servings of spicy tteokbokki along with a bottle of iced tea to share. While waiting for it to happen, Jungkook had decided to put on Criminal Minds, only because he knew how much you liked it, he’d never seen it before, so you were really excited to show him the first seasons. You were sitting on the couch, knees to your chin and Jungkook’s arm around your body. You didn’t know it, but the singer kept taking peaks at your face, admiring you enjoying your favorite show. He found it funny that the show was about such awful things, but you listened to it so intently, and had even called it your comfort show. You looked so happy, so calm, Jungkook wished he could only ever see you like this, and never have you feel down, like you had the day you’d first met.

The doorbell rang, startling you, Jungkook took his arm off you and jumped over the couch to get to the door. While he was thanking the delivery man, you took a few bills from your wallet that was in your jacket and set them down on the table. Jungkook dropped the hot boxes in front of you, and quickly went to get glasses for you. When he came back he realized the money on the table wasn’t his so he handed it back to you.

“No, it’s for the food.”

“___, it’s my treat.” You shook your head, insisting he took your money. “It’s fine, I swear.” You ignored him and started opening the two boxes, putting one on your right for him, and filling his glass with the cold drink before starting with your own. He sighed in defeat and left the money where it was, and thanked you before sitting back down and digging in. He raised his glass to yours and tilted it with a smile. You did the same with yours and clinked them together, smiling cheekily. “Cheers.”

⭒

You clenched your eyes at the light the sun was letting in and spread your arms on the bed, feeling around for the teddy bear you usually slept with. Confused as to why you couldn’t find it, you slowly opened your eyes and frowned when you realized the bed you were resting in wasn’t yours. You sat up and took a look around the room, admiring the many Marvel figurines on the shelves. You remembered dinner with Jungkook last night, and cleaning up, as well as watching more episodes of your favorite crime show. But you didn’t remember coming in his bedroom. You stood up, ruffling your jeans to get comfortable in them, before slowly heading for bathroom. Your hair was a mess, so you wet your hands and tried to tame it with some water. When you deemed it was enough, you went to the living room.

“Kook ?” You called out, whispering. The closer you got closer to the living area, the louder the snoring sounded.

You walked to the couch and looked down at the man sleeping. Jungkook’s hair was a mess, he was wearing shorts and a large shirt and the beanie he had on last night was now discarded on the floor. You bent down to pick it up and since you didn’t know what to do, you sat down on the other side of the couch so you wouldn’t disturb your friend’s slumber. You knew Jungkook snored, you’d seen his friends mock him in videos, and he’d even told you himself, but it was still surprising. It was loud, very loud, but it was also so endearing, the way his nose scrunched up the same way as when he smiled too hard, made you want to place soft kisses all over his face. You decided to lay down on the couch, you brought your legs up to rest them under your chin and simply waited for your friend to wake up.

Bam whined when he heard the leather of the couch move and ran up to see who it was, as soon as he recognized you, he jumped on the couch and settled next to you, accidentally waking up his dad.

“Hi.” You said softly, a dumb smile on your face from Jungkook’s hair flying in all directions.

“Good morning.” He rubbed his eyes and yawned, sitting up. He patted his lap and whistled for his dog to give him a hug, which he happily did. “Do you want to eat something ?” He turned to you.

“No, thank you. I’m just gonna go home.” Your cheeks gained some warmth, which went unseen by him as you mumbled out the rest of your sentence. “Wanted to say hello to you first.”

He quickly stood up and walked to his kitchen counter to take his car keys. “I’ll take you home.” He said while struggling to slip his shoes on.

“Thanks.” Why are you feeling disappointed when you’re the one that said you wanted to leave ? He’s just being the kind, friendly soul he’s always been, so why does that sadden you ? Maybe, it’s because you don’t want him to waste his time with you, and you hoped he’d leave you alone. Truly, it’s because you wished he would ask you to stay, and cuddle him some more like you had yesterday when you fell asleep.

“My lady.” He opened the door for you and did an exaggerated reverence when you walked past him. You laughed and leaned against the wall while waiting for him to bid goodbye to his dog and lock the door behind him. “C’mon.” He turns to you and sigh. “___, you’re gonna be cold.” He zips your jacket up, shaking his head and flicking your nose with his finger when it’s fully closed. He wraps his arm around you and leads you to the elevator.

When the car reaches your apartment complex, he brings your face closer to his with his hand on the back of your head, and presses a loving kiss to your temple. “Bye bye.”

“Bye.” You open the door sheepishly and wave goodbye. You quickly walk inside the building and without looking back, climb into the elevator and soon enough, get inside your home. It’s a Saturday, so there’s not really anything you have to do, apart from cleaning a little, all of your assignments are finished, there’s no need for new groceries, you’re off work. You walk to your fridge and take a coke bottle into your hands before untwisting its cap and chugging the drink down your throat. That’s when a question stops you ; why’d you leave Jungkook’s apartment ? You’re only going to stay in bed the whole day, when you could’ve had fun with him. You decide to hop in the shower and rest in bed for the rest of the day. You use your time to your advantage, you wax your entire body, give your hair an oil bath and pamper your skin when you get out of the steaming room. One of the many sheet masks you’re putting away is said to be for combination skin and has a cute bunny draw on it, which takes your mind back to your tattooed friend. You swiftly snap a picture of it, but don’t press send and keep it in your album. Finally, you take your lip mask and spread a good glob of it on your lips before getting under your fluffy blanket to watch something on Disney+. Thank god for scholarships because if not for it, your job wouldn’t enable you to pay for everything you have, especially not your new phone, and expensive self-care products. After an afternoon watching Criminal Minds, and a very yummy dinner, you finally muster the strength to text Jungkook, selecting the picture you took earlier with a text.

baby🪽

i saw this and it made me think of you it’s so cute 🥹

i saw this and it made me think of yo

i saw this and it ma

i saw th

taglist :

@gothvkth @beigerin @babycandy111 @jjanjankook @joonsboy

We all have our issues | Chapter 2

idol!jungkook x chubby!student!reader

Summary : you ask Jungkook to go grocery shopping with you, but the day doesn’t end as nicely as it started.

Words : 1684

Warnings : mommy and daddy issues, scolding, “fighting” in public, body shaming, crying, jealousy.

Notes : kook’s jealous, oc’s nervous, and sad, she gets bad memories and does something pretty bad, there’s some mean ladies in the store, and Jk is still just as whipped for her.

“No, I’m sorry… you know I love Bam. But, she’s my cat, Kook. You can’t blame me for loving her more.” You argued over the phone, he wanted you to admit you liked his dog more than you did your own pet, Meimei.

“Yeah, I get that. But does she run to you when you come home ?” He asks in the most condescending tone. “I don’t think so…”

“Bam shits on your floor, so I really don’t know what point you’re trying to make.” He let out a surprised scoff and laughs at your reasoning. You twist open your lipgloss and apply a good layer of it before taking your phone into your hand and taking it off speaker. “I need some groceries, d’you want to come with ?”

“Sure.” You heard shuffling around and keys jingling. “Want me to pick you up ?”

“No, don’t bother, I’m just gonna take the bus.” You put your sandals back on and head out to the bus stop. Today had been a pretty short day, you only had classes in the morning and had been free since one pm. The weather was also really great, hence why you wore the long flowery summer dress that your friends always complimented you on.

“I’ll meet you there then, be careful baby.”

“You too, bye.” You hang up and shove the phone in your purse.

⭒

“Ooh, I’ll go get candies !” You giddily slap Jungkook’s arm as you point towards the snacks aisle. You each had gotten a small basket, because he had realized groceries were well overdue at his house.

“Get me some of those peach rings, yeah ?”

You nod and hurry to the where the sweets were stocked, softly humming to the tune that was playing around the store. When you reach the range of choices, you scan it quickly and finally find the one you were originally here for. Cherry, as well as coke for you and peach for your friend. Once your goods had been placed in your basket, you decided to go in search of new sweets to try.

"Look at kids nowadays, always trying so hard to set a bad example." An older woman mutters to her friend, pointing at you, in what she thought was a discreet way. You frown, confused as to what she meant, and finally notice that her gaze was set on your body, and on the candies you're holding in your hands in addition to those in your basket. Your shoulders noticeably fall, and you drop the candies back where you had found them. The two women are gone by now, but you’re still in front of the bright colored packagings, debating whether you should buy them, or restrain yourself. Exactly how were you actually setting a bad example ? By eating food you liked, or maybe it was because they didn’t allow their kids to have any type of “unhealthy” food. You’re shaken out of your thoughts by a warm hand on your shoulder, and you turn around to see Jungkook looking at you with a confused frown.

“Are you okay ?” He asks chuckling a little.

“Yeah.” You hold up the basket with the candies and point to his peach rings. “I got the candies.”

“Did you want to try these, too ?” He takes the flower shaped treats you were staring so intently at and throws them in his basket.

“No.” You quickly shake your head and reach to put them back on the shelf. “I was just thinking about something.”

“It’s fine.” He stops your hand from grabbing the plastic bag and laughs. “Baby, just leave it. If we don’t like at least we’ll know not to buy it again. Also, you love all candies, so I don’t think we should worry about that ?”

“Whatever, but you’re gonna eat them all alone, then.” You pout and turn back to continue shopping to stop him from asking more questions.

You both quickly take what you need and immediately head to the registers, where you’re greeted by a kind looking man.

“Hello.” He greets you with a smile, which obviously makes one appear on your face, kind people make you happy, what can you say ?

“Hello. How’re you ?” You ask as Jungkook’s stare wavers between the two of you.

“Very good, thank you.” He asks you how your day is going, and from then on starts a conversation between you two, further excluding your friend. Jungkook is snapped out of his trance by the sound of your credit card going through.

You and the cashier continue your conversation as he mindlessly scans Jungkook’s articles and with his eyes still in you, asks him for his payment of choice. Your friend remains silent and pulls out his black card, quickly paying and grabbing his bags to get away as quick as possible.

Just as you’re about to bid goodbye to your new friend, Jungkook wraps an arm around you and lead you out. He takes your groceries and puts them in his car, muttering something about him driving you home. Which he does, and after the long ride back to your apartment, he stops you at your door to ask you something.

“Baby, you wanna go out for dinner tomorrow night ?” His hands hold onto yours tightly, and he’s looking at you with his big, starry eyes, and yet, that doesn’t stop you from getting lost in your own mind.

“And a salad for the lady.” The kind woman sets your plate down in front of you with a warm smile. You ogle at the five different types of Syrian salad set on the plate and take your cutlery in your hands with a happy dance. Your younger brother snickers at your attitude but you pay him no mind, and start eating your meal.

“Ooh, that looks good.” Chuckles your dad, cutting a piece of bread and scooping some olives and hummus, groaning at the flavor. You bring the pate closer to the middle of the table, so that everyone can have some of it, and take some rice from the larger plate next to it.

A few minutes later, you go back for more salad, and gasp when you find the plate empty. “What ? You ate all the salad ?” You ask your father with a teasing smile, although it did bother you a little, you could still order another plate.

“You’re so mean, seriously. Why can’t you, for once, be nice and I don’t know, try to be a part of the family ?” Your mother rolls her eyes and wipes the edge of the plate with a piece of bread to taste the dish. “I don’t know where I messed up with you. Such a selfish brat…” She mutters, but makes sure she says it loud enough so you can hear it.

Everyone at the table is now staring at you, silently chewing their food. You set down your fork and put your hands on your lap, sending a smile her way before fixing your eyes on your hands for the rest of the evening. Throughout the whole dinner, you could feel your siblings stealing glances at you, and even people from other tables were now staring, wondering why everything was so quiet now. Once it’s time to pay, you stand up, but your parents push you away and pay before you can get a word in. “Swear to you, this kid is unable to get out of her house without causing a scene.” She sighs, letting her head rest against your dad’s shoulder.

Your body deflates even more after hearing her, and you were convinced you now looked even sadder than the deflated balloon men in front of the car sales shop two blocks from your house. You didn’t wait for anyone and simply left to get in your car, and go back to your apartment to cuddle with your cat.

“___ ?” He calls, bringing your attention back to him.

“Yeah ?”

“Dinner, tomorrow night, just you and me ?” He repeats with a hopeful look in his eyes. After seeing you laugh with the cashier, he wanted to make sure to shoot his shot so he’d get you all to himself. Not in the bizarre way, of course, if you rejected him, he’d accept it and try to move on, but you wouldn’t, he kept repeating to himself.

“Oh.” You stop yourself from truthfully answering and blink away the small teardrops that has found their way in your eyes. “I don’t think I’m the greatest person to go out with, Kook.” You chuckle awkwardly and wrap your arms around him in a hug that feels more suffocating than comforting. “I’ll see you another time, though.” You gently kiss his cheek and get inside your apartment building before he can say anything else.

You hurry back inside your home and quickly take off all your clothes to hop in the shower and wash away all the bad thoughts you were getting. When you step out of the room, Mei is here, meowing for you to cuddle her, and you do, but soon the tears can’t be stopped. So you just lay on your couch, you cat licking your hand in hopes of making you feel better, and tears staining your fluffy pink pillows.

Jungkook stands there dumbfounded, his eyes staring at the door with shock written all over his face. The shock doesn’t last long before it gets overwhelmed by sadness and disappointment. Still, he finds himself smiling like an idiot at your reaction. Even while rejecting him, you still gave him a hug and kissed his cheek, he brushes his fingers over the emplacement of your kiss, and blushes. It’s fine if you only want to be friends, Jungkook can accept that, as long as he has you in his life, nothing else matters.

taglist :

@gothvkth @beigerin @babycandy111 @jjanjankook @joonsboy

MERLOT !

summary. nothing scarier then confronting past memories and being vulnerable!

notes. well! tbh i find it rly fascinating what events from their childhood make ppl act the way they do in relationships so i thought it would be intresting to dive into oc a lil further! hope y'all enjoy ˚⋆.✧˚

warnings /includes. ( 1.8 k / angst, fluff) comforting! 'let me take care of u'! ceo! jungkook x non specified! reader, hints at domestic abuse and daddy issues, angst, rly bad ex :/ , comfort!

the plane was once again quiet.

he doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, doesn't talk. you knew this would happen, you change people for the worse, that's what your father used to say. he became violent, blamed it on you and your 'reckless' behavior.

that's what happened to your ex as well; you used to like the innocence he asserted to you. embraced it, bathed in it because you finally felt like you learnt how to earn love. changed yourself for love.

but it was never enough, everything you offered at some point wasn't fulfilling to him. he changed too, not for good.

you don't want to ruin jungkook.

jungkook rarely even looked at you, didn't talk to you either besides business. and you are so scared that you had already worn onto him, that he was beginning to change as well.

not long after the plane landed, you're outside, wandering aimlessly through the city streets. the cold night air bites at your skin, but it doesn’t help to clear your mind.

you want to drown it out, drown him out. and it hurt because that was exactly what prompted you to meet him in the first place, you had wanted to drown your ex out. now the circle repeated itself.

why did life have to be so fucking unfair?

you push open the wooden door, it felt way to heavy, it was just a random bar you spotted while walking.

greeted an older bartender, ordered an whiskey. you happened to take a look at the bottle label: it was one of the ones jungkook had on his display. you were sure that your own life was actively playing a cruel joke on you.

but the pain is stubborn it doesn't go away with just a sip, clinges onto you, harder. you take another sip, bigger, it's another attempt — it was no use.

you want to go back to milan, at exactly 1:37am, walking around with him. but sadly, time doesn't cooperate so you motion for another drink, that's really all that you could do.

"drinking are we?" you hear a voice just as you settle the empty second glass on the table and you freeze momentarly. you don't have to turn around to see who it was, you knew the sharp and disapproving tone.

and suddenly the pain gets replaced with deep disgusting fear. earlier you had thought that you would rather feel anything else then the strong ache but you had been wrong. the misary had been better then this new emotion.

you give him the silence treatment, don't turn around, don't talk. in reality you were way to scared to look back in the first place.

"you're just like your father"

his words shouldn't get to you because deep down you knew he was wrong. you were nothing like the man he compared you to, could never be like him. but it still got to you, it stung.

it reopened wounds that you had worked tightly on wrapping and you frantically try to work on closing them again as he spat out more of his anger. the more he spoke, the more did your vision blurry and it made it impossible to tie them back properly.

he reaches his hand forward to touch your shoulder and you scream, tears coating your face. you think it would be a sight that would push him away, he hated seeing you a true mess, it wasn't the clean version he liked of you. yet he trys again, a smirk on his face.

you burry yourself behind the bartender's counter as the security drags him away, tears continue streaming down your face as you dial jungkooks number.

you don't remember what you tell him, you don't even quite understand yourself through the sobs but you do remember jungkook asking you if you were safe right now, that you should stay right there and that he'd be there in ten.

he makes it in seven.

jungkook holds your hand tightly while he leads you to his car, it was pouring. you wondered how he managed to be so fast without getting into an accident. he doesn't start the engine instead continues holding both of your hands calmly as you cry, doesn't ask any questions either.

he gives you a few more minutes, kisses your palms, tells you to breathe, tells you you're safe. you lean back against the seat, feeling the car’s warmth gradually ease the chill from your bones while he starts driving.

eventually, you make it to his house. you hadn't been able to fully register it back when you were drunk, but it was big, expensive, maybe a bit depressing with it's minimalist structure.

jungkook doesn't pressure you to talk inside too, wraps you in a fluffy blanket, prepares tea with a concentration that was admirable like he was perfecting it just for you as you watch him from your designated spot on the coach.

he sits beside you and brings your legs across his lap, handing you the warm cup full of tea. he watches you carefully as you blow on it gently before taking a tentative sip while he rubs your ankle comfortingly.

you take another sip from the tea, it's something cherry-flavored, burning hot. you rest your head against the familar coach, looking at him. you don't want to talk, don't want to disrupt the peace you felt right now, with the things your ex had done and said.

words full of anger and spite have no space and no use near jungkook, not now, not today.

he brings his hands to cup the back of your neck softly, "i can run you a hot bath, get you some clothes"

you close your eyes momentarly at his touch and your vocie cracks, "i'm sorry" you're sorry that you couldn't get over yourself and tell him what happened, sorry that the words of the man who hurt you so much still have so much effect over you, sorry that you hurted jungkook by ignoring him for the past few days.

jungkook shakes his head, "no, don’t apologize. you don't have to tell me what happened if you're not ready,” he pauses, “but i was really scared. when you called. i just-"

jungkook takes a deep breath. he runs his fingers over your shoulders before speaking again, “i just want you to be happy. just want you to be safe.”

you take a pause because those were beautiful words. but that's the thing with words, somebody says something beautiful, you want to remember but then you slowly start to forget. you wanted jungkook to tell you that everyday, so you'd never.

"i want you to be happy too," i'm just sure you wouldn't be happy with me. is the part you leave out, not wanting to ruin the moment.

his eyes soften as he watches over you, fingers brushing over your features, "i want to take care of you"

after you're finished with your tea, he guides you to the bathroom gently. helps you get out of your clothes, places light kisses on your back, makes sure the water is just warm enough.

he kisses the spot right below your ear while he begins slowly shampooing your hair, “do you want to talk about it now?” he asks quietly.

it's hard to get your tongue to speak but you feel jungkooks reassuring hands, it's the same hand which pull the words out gently. so you tell him about your ex, tell him about how he used to like you, tell him what he said, how he tried to touch you.

tell him about your father. not everything because some memories your brain simply locked for your own safety.

and he listens, doesn't interrupt a single time, kissing your shoulders as you talk about your childhood. "you deserve to be loved," jungkook says, so sincerely, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

the precious words sink into the sea of your heart, calm down the strom, fill you with inner warmth.

"i'm scared," you look down at your hands in the water, "i don't want to become him, i don't want to hurt you."

"you're not him and will never be," he says softly, as if he's stating a simple fact, "you're strong, kind and you care, so much more then anybody would"

there’s no hesitation in his gaze, no flicker of uncertainty — only a steady conviction that makes you want to believe him.

“you’ve been hurt, so much more than anyone should have to bear,” jungkook continues, his hands sliding down to hold yours under the water. “but that doesn’t mean you’re doomed to repeat the past. it doesn’t mean you’re destined to hurt anyone.”

his gaze wanders of to your intertwined hands shortly until he looks back at you, "you have the power to chose differently, to be better. and you already have chosen."

"and you deserve somebody who cares for you, loves you, cherishes you, i want to be that person for you."

you're still scared. the possibilties of you hurting somebody as precious as jungkook were deeply engraved into your mind but you ignore them, nodding slowly to brush them away. to be selfish for once. "i want to be that for you too"

jungkook smiles in response, wiping away the water droplets from your face, “let’s finish up so we can get you into bed, pretty.”

he helps you stand up, envelopes you in a towel, asks you if you can sit down for him so he can dry your hair. tenderly makes sure to not leave out a single wet strand until every bit of water was gone.

all that can be heard was the rain that was now a lot softer then it was a few hours ago, tapping against the window. you can smell jungkooks scent on the clothes he gave you earlier, you could feel his arms around you, the expensive sheets quality below.

he shifts slightly, his lips pressing little kisses over your jawline and cheeks, asking muffled, "what do you want?" as he continues his services, "i'll give you everything"

you think about it for a few seconds, "a kitten"

growing up, you couldn't afford to have a cat in your house due to the violence. there was no way that such a fragile little animal would've been safe in that enviornment. but you had always loved kittys.

he hums as you turn to look at his face, intertwining your hands together, "that's cute, we can name her cheonsa, you know what that means?"

you shake your head lightly, mouthing a 'what?'

"something that reminds me of you, i won't tell you"

the room is filled with comfortable silence for a few minutes while you listen to him breathe, "we should go back to milan, no business" “then we’ll go back to milan,” he whispers against your skin. “and we’ll come back home to a kitten. do you want that?”

🍓 tag list — @chansloverr , @marimarvelfan , @bxcndd , @1-in-abillion , @ahgasegotarmy116 , @copycat-namjesus , @malkaimoon , @geminiml95 , @taiwan0618 , @jungkookfics , @rrosiitas , @stuti2904 , @spiderlilyserendipity , @m00njinnie , @ririkookiemonster , @emptynessclub

perfect for you - jjk.

summary: it’s so rare that your boyfriend makes a mistake. so when he does, it’s a hard reminder for both of you that he’s not perfect, he’s human. but if anything, he’s perfect for you.

word count: 3.1k

genre/warnings: established relationship, angst, comfort, both jk and reader are whipped for each other!!, a lot of self-deprecating thoughts, it has a cute ending but hurts my heart (most of it is just jk feeling shitty for his mistake) :(

——————————————————————————

There was one thing your boyfriend hated most in the world, and it was seeing you upset. Whether it was for something simple like the gas station being out of your go-to drink or something much worse - if he was the reason. You were the light of his life, and just seeing a frown on your pretty face was enough to make his heart shatter into millions of pieces.

That's why he always did everything in his power to keep you happy. Surprise you every week with one of your favorite snacks, leave a bouquet of flowers at your work desk, cook you your favorite dinner. He did it all just so he could keep you happy. Because when you were happy, everything was right in his world.

Tonight had been one of the nights he was planning on having a small date with you. The new horror movie that you had been raving about was finally out on streaming services and you had been looking forward to this movie night for the whole week. You even decided to take off work a couple hours early because this time you wanted to be the one to treat your boyfriend.

He was always the giver of the relationship. Even though you felt bad many times because you felt like you didn't give nearly as much as he did, he was always there to console you. Reassure you that receiving your love was the only gift he could ever want.

Even though you hated to admit it, sometimes it was hard to remember that your boyfriend of 2 years isn't perfect. He makes mistakes too, and that's completely fine. It's just hard to face.

You were excited for the evening when you got the text from Jungkook that he was on the way to his boxing lesson and would be back home in an hour and a half. Your boyfriend was definitely a busy man, but that never once bothered you. He put so much passion and work into his profession, he deserved everything he'd earned up to his day. So besides the fact that you were a little dejected when he added boxing lessons onto his long list of things to do, you supported him just like you always did. After all, no matter how many things he’d taken onto his plate, he always found a spot to fit you in. Made one if he had to.

When you received the text you were in the middle of setting up the house. You may have taken the idea of treating him a bit overboard, but you didn't care. This was only a portion of what he did for you, and you could spontaneously treat him just like he did with you. You weren't doing anything too extravagant, but you wanted to have a nice night in with him.

You took the liberty of cooking your own food instead of ordering out, which had been a bit of a challenge. After almost burning yourself with the oil more than just a few times, the fried chicken had turned out a beautiful golden brown. You spent the time searching through the internet to find the perfect sauce recipe that replicated one from his favorite fried chicken restaurant.

You had even decided to set up a cozy setup on the couch. Laying out fuzzy blankets along with snacks you had gotten from the convenience store down the street, you were pretty much ready for a long night in with your boyfriend. Due to your flexible workdays, you went in fairly late the next day so you could stay up late to watch the movie and maybe even a couple episodes of the true crime series you had both got invested in. You knew that he would want to take a shower when he got back from his boxing practice so you even laid out a fresh towel and pair of pajamas for him in the bathroom so he wouldn't have to do any unnecessary work.

You finished the food right on the dot, at the exact time that he always came back from his practices. You sat down on the couch with a content smile. The air smelled of the delicious fried chicken that you had set out on two different plates and the movie was pulled up on the TV.

All you had to do at this point was wait for your handsome boyfriend to come through the door so you could finally give him some of the treatment that he always graced you with. You glanced down at your phone to slightly frown at the time. It was 10 minutes past when he usually came home, but you decided to just shrug it off. It was a Friday and traffic got bad sometimes.

That was the excuse that you tried to use until the time had soon hit 9:30. You were borderline worried at this point, because there were no texts from him or updates on anything that was happening. You were wondering if he was even safe at this point, but the worry had faded away when you checked and confirmed that he was still at the gym. Sometimes you felt a bit bad for invading his privacy and checking his phone location, but in situations like this you couldn't help yourself. You never doubted him or his loyalty, but this was just a matter of concern.

When the clock hit 9:55, you were instead becoming upset. He was almost an hour late on coming home and there had been no texts or calls from him telling you why he was at the gym this late. His phone was obviously on, you had even sent a couple of texts asking if he was alright. All to receive no reply from him.

Did he really not remember? Not even after you had spent the whole week only talking about this one night and how much you were looking forward to this? You would be a bit less upset if he even bothered to text you and tell you why he was running so late, but you had received no communication.

It was when 10:15 hit that you were done waiting. You had grown too upset over this, and sitting on the couch while blinking away your tears wasn't going to fix anything. After eating your plate of the now slightly soggy fried chicken you had made over an hour ago, you were retiring to the bedroom.

If he wanted to be over an hour late home and not text you once, he could come home to a quiet house. With a shaky sigh you slipped off the matching pajamas you had been waiting to wear and instead changed into one of your oversized sleep shirts before crawling into the cold bed and curling up with a pillow, shutting your eyes.

--

Jungkook knew he fucked up. It was something that he usually never did when it came to you because being the cause of your distress was the last thing he would ever want. He had been so stressed with his upcoming photoshoots for his solo dropping in a month that he had been spending extra time at the gym. He wanted to be in shape for the photoshoots, especially since it had been long since he had any major media uploads.

After spending around 6 months being inactive while his older bandmates had gone to the military, he had fallen out of his normal habits. Not that he gained a huge amount of weight, he just wasn't satisfied with how the break changed him. Which was the reason he had spent so much time at the gym.

Not that he was ever expecting to spend an extra hour at the gym. He hadn't meant to, getting distracted in all the drills that his instructor was teaching him. He should've trusted the off feeling in his gut when it came, telling him that he had forgotten something.

There was one major problem with this gym he went to - the service absolutely sucked. After hitting send on a text at 9:00 that he would be spending extra time at the gym, he hadn't spent the few seconds to make sure the text went through and therefore missed the error on the screen. Even though the bad reception wasn't his fault, his heart still dropped when he left the gym and saw his notifications.

At first he wasn't that worried because he remembered the terrible reception, but then it dawned on him. One of the texts you sent him had something about you waiting with the movie ready. His eyes widened as he looked at the screen and he could physically feel his heart dropping to his stomach.

How could he forget? You had been talking about this date night all week, saying it was the one thing you were looking forward to it. And he forgot all about it and instead to take extra time at the gym. Without even letting you know, because the stupid message didn't even send through.

After he read your messages he was instantly sending replies, hurried apologies and telling you that he would be home soon. He practically sprinted to his car and threw his gym bag into the passenger seat, barely taking the time to buckle up before he sped off.

His mind was racing at the moment, beating himself down for forgetting. Since messing up was something that Jungkook practically never did, whenever he made a mistake he was always beating himself up for it. Repeatedly calling himself a dumbass as he sped through the streets at 10:40.

He had rushed so much that he left his bag in the car, only grabbing his keys and phone before jamming on the elevator button and impatiently waiting for it to arrive. His foot was repeatedly tapping on the floor, one of his most common displays of distress and anxiety. After what seemed like a 5 minute elevator ride, he was hurriedly running down the hallway and apologizing for almost full on bulldozing a lady who was going the opposite way. He jammed the keys into the door and opened it, his eyes immediately searching for you.

If possible, his heart dropped even more when he saw the scene in front of him. The dim lights were still on as he took in everything you spent time to set up. The blankets on the couch, the movie still pulled up on the TV, the food. His heart was slowly but shattering as he realized that you did this all for him. He even noticed the oil fryer sitting on the kitchen counter with the two plates of next to it, only one plate full. You had even cooked for him? He knew how terrified you were of using the oil frier due to your many attempts at making fries that just ended up in him being forced to handle it.

The most important thing to him at the moment however was the absence of you. You weren't sitting on the couch, standing in the kitchen, or even glaring at him when he came into the house. That was what scared him shitless. After carelessly dropping his keys and phone onto the kitchen counter and slipping off his shoes he was walking straight to the bedroom. Every time he looked at a new spot, he was feeling more and more shitty. You had prepared all of this for him and he basically stood you up.

His frown deepened when he walked into the dark bedroom and made out your figure laying down in the bed cuddling a pillow. You had to go to sleep while hugging something, and that something was usually Jungkook. But tonight you had to use the pillow instead of him because he wasn't there. It should be him holding you right now, but he had missed all of this just because he was worrying about his appearance rather than being with the one person who had full access to his heart and soul.

The only thing on his mind right now was apologizing to you. Telling you that he was an idiot and neglected the most important person in his life. But when he saw your even breathing he paused a bit, heaving a quiet sigh. He was conflicted right now. He didn't want to disturb you, but at the same time he didn't want you waking up the next morning and realizing that he came home and didn't try to apologize to you.

So instead he decided to do something that he knew might wake you up. Whenever he came home late at night from his schedules, you'd always get woken up by him running the shower. Most nights you'd join him, massaging any of the tension he'd collected that day.

He walked into the bathroom and once again winced when he saw the towel and pair of pajamas that you'd laid out for him. It was one of the matching pairs you got for them. Something cheesy you did that he pretended to hate but secretly loved. His bottom lip was slightly quivering when he turned the shower water on and proceeded to get in to wash himself.

A huge part of him was hoping that he would hear the shower door open or feel your gentle hands on his shoulders. But after 10 minutes, nothing happened. So he just decided to get out of the shower and dry himself on, only putting on his boxers since it was usually what he wore to sleep.

Even though you hadn't come to join him in the shower, he could tell that his plan partially worked. Your breathing was no longer leveled out and your position had slightly changed, meaning that you woke up. He could also see a glimpse of your face and your eyes were halfway opened.

He knew that now was his chance to apologize to you for being a shitty boyfriend and forgetting the date that you had planned. He was fully prepared to beg for your forgiveness if he had to, get on his knees, anything. He just didn't want you to be upset or angry.

He slowly sat down on the bed, moving closer towards you as he got under the covers. He cautiously laid a hand on your shoulder and almost let out a sigh of relief when you didn't move or hit his hand away. At least you weren't angry with him.

But he thought that this was worse. You were upset with him, and that meant that you had probably cried. He took your lack of a reaction as an okay to move a bit closer - and so he did. He moved to where he was right behind you, his hand beginning to softly caress the skin of your shoulder.

"Hey Princess, you awake? I'm sorry that I woke you up, but I just wanted to apologize. I know that you don't deserve excuses, and I don't want to give you any. It was completely my fault for forgetting about this date night and I'm so sorry. I know that you've been so excited about this all week and it slipped my mind. I'm so sorry." Jungkook said in one of the most gentlest, softest voices. He was waiting in anticipation for your answer, but felt any hope dissipate from your lack of answer. He fucked up big time, and he felt like he deserved a worst boyfriend ever award.

Knowing better than to push you when you were upset with him, he just settled for placing a small kiss on your shoulder before he moved back to his side of the bed. He stared at the ceiling for a while, wondering if you even wanted him to be in there. He thought that if you didn't want to communicate with him, then you probably wanted your alone time and him to not be in the same room as you.

He was about to get out of the bed to go walk to the living room when he was surprised by a movement from your side of the bed. He was frozen in place when he felt the warmth of your body on his side, one of your arms wrapping around him and your head moving to rest on his chest.

"It's fine." You mumbled simply, which was enough to lift all of the weight off of Jungkook's shoulders and make him feel like he was floating. You weren't ignoring him, and you were the one to reach for him. Even if the tear stains on your cheeks did nothing but make his heart constrict, he pushed any of those feelings away.

He decided against his better judgement to not say anything in response and just hold you. He had already apologized, and you accepted it. He didn't need to say anything else, and so he just wrapped his arms around you. Pulling you closer to him and closing his eyes to fall asleep once he felt your breathing even out once again.

--

It had been hard the night before to stop Jungkook from leaving the bed. You could tell what had been going through his head at the moment and you hated it. The only thing that you didn't like about Jungkook was how hard he was on himself. Not only when it came to work, but also when it came to personal matters.

He was a perfectionist to the core. There had been so many times you had been called by his managers because you were the only one who could drag him out of the practice room. Too many times you had caught him in the bathroom frowning at himself or crying because of a mistake he made on stage.

Your boyfriend only wanted what was best for his fans, to prove to himself and others that he was skilled. So you could tell just from Jungkook's tone and words that he was beating himself up for what he did. He barely ever made mistakes.

There was only one other occasion you could think of a mistake he made before in the three years you had been dating him and 5 years you had known him before that. The only reason that you had been initially so upset was because of this. He never made mistakes, so it was sort of a shock to your system when he did this.

But you had to remind yourself that no matter how perfect he presented himself, your boyfriend was a human. Humans have flaws and make mistakes. Nobody is perfect no matter how hard you try. You had made way more mistakes than he had and each time he was the one comforting you instead of the other way around. Your boyfriend wasn't perfect, but he was perfect for you. You loved him with all of your heart just as he loved you.

masterlist/about me

→ about me: my name is nat, i'm someone who writes in their free time! i usually write only for jungkook but there may be times where i write for others! this account is pretty much just an outlet for me to write so updates might not be consistent. → warning: topics i write about may vary from genres/category so make sure you always read the warnings beforehand! → requests/asks: open

MASTERLIST BELOW

current works: 5. last updated 1/19/24

DRABBLES/ONESHOTS:

perfect for you - jjk. (10/29/23) angst & comfort summary: it’s so rare that your boyfriend makes a mistake. so when he does, it’s a hard reminder for both of you that he’s not perfect, he’s human. but if anything, he’s perfect for you.

cornflower blue - jjk. (10/31/23) smut & fluff summary: nights were your favorite time with your boyfriend. the nights where you laid in bed together, tangled up in each other without any thoughts of the real world.

never go to sleep angry - jjk. (11/2/23) angst & comfort summary: one of the most important rules of your relationship was to never go to sleep angry. when the rule was ignored, it led to an argument and a huge misunderstanding.

SERIES MASTERLISTS:

best friends...? - jjk. (started 1/6/24) fluff, angst, smut?? (idk) summary: a compilation of moments in which you find yourself questioning your relationship with your lifelong best friend.. wondering if it was simply friendship or instead so much more.

disclaimer: please don't copy/repost my works on any other platforms including tumblr or post translations! thank you

cornflower blue - jjk.

summary: nights were your favorite time with your boyfriend. the nights where you laid in bed together, tangled up in each other without any thoughts of the real world.

word count: 4.3k

genre/warnings: established relationship, porn with (kinda) plot, fluff, smut!!, unprotected sex, soft!dom jungkook, really soft overall, lots of praise, fingering, aftercare, dirty talk, creampie, jk loves to use pet names (tbh i didn't proofread this)

bruised on your face like a watercolor bloom, moonlight paints your skin cornflower blue

Every time you got a glance of your boyfriend, you wondered how on earth you were so lucky to find him. Every morning you spent next to him, you thanked whatever brought him to you because you couldn't imagine a life without him anymore. Without sharing your mornings and evenings together, having stay at home dates, sharing everything. The good, bad, and the ugly. There were moments where you felt like you could just stare at him for hours. Right now was one of those moments.

It was the mundane moments that really got to you. He had just gotten home from work a couple hours prior. The two of you had shared dinner together, he had ranted about his day like usual, and he had gone to the bathroom for his routine shower before bed. Now he was laying on the bed with you in all his glory. Damp hair, glasses resting on the bridge of his nose, pajamas lazily pulled on, the two of you watching an episode of the baking competition show you two loved so much.

Somewhere during the episode you had lost focus once you got a glimpse of your boyfriend. He was much more interesting than the show to you, much more beautiful than any piece of artwork. Every curve and dip of his face, every blemish and mole, it was so perfect. The light of the TV brightened his features enough, allowing you to look at him even more in depth. Swoon over the beautiful brown eyes that were focused on the show.

It was almost as if your boyfriend could sense you staring. After a couple minutes of you watching him, his eyes flickered over to you. Earlier on in the relationship you would've shied away from his gaze at the prospect of being caught, but not anymore. Not when all you wanted to do every second of the day was remind him just how perfect he was. His eyes immediately softened when he saw you already looking at, revealing the gaze that he always had reserved only for you.

"Feeling tired, baby?" He asked in a tone full of affection, one of his hands moving to gently brush a strand of your hair out of your face. Your heart practically fluttered as his fingertips barely grazed the skin of your cheek. He was always so attentive to you that it made your heart throb uncontrollably. 

"Mhm.. Can we just lay down and listen to our playlist?" You asked quietly, provoking a soft smile from him. It was one of the things you both loved to do. You loved music equally, and that love had produced a playlist that the two of you only listened to together. It had everything on it. Silly songs, slow songs, things that you wanted to recommend to each other. The song had 700 songs and was still being added to.

"Of course we can, come here.." Jungkook replied, holding an arm open for you. Without a second thought you were immediately abandoning your spot on the bed next to him in favor for crawling directly into his arms. With an arm now wrapped around you he cut off the TV and opened his phone, going into his music app to play the playlist. One of the first songs that played was soft R&B, one of the songs that had been recommended to him by his fans.

A small yawn fell from your lips as you rested your head against his shoulder just like always. His hand had instinctively traveled under your t-shirt, starting to rub slow circles into your waist. You had one of your hands in his hair, playing with the soft strands that he had decided to grow out a while ago. Everything in the moment felt perfect, like it was where the two of you belonged. Laying in bed with your limbs tangled, listening to the music.

You eventually found yourself looking back at Jungkook, you just couldn't help it. How could you not admire the most breathtaking person you'd ever laid eyes on? Especially not when he was looking right back at you, his eyes holding the same admiration that you were feeling for him at the moment. It was almost like the music faded into the background and now you were just stuck sharing a gaze with your boyfriend. Without the light of the TV anymore, the moonlight casted a blue hue in your shared bedroom, illuminating his features.

He was so stunning that it hurt. You wished nothing more than to be able to fully convey the things you felt for him. There wasn't a day that you didn't tell him how much you loved him or how handsome he was, and yet you still felt as if it wasn't enough. Words could never truly describe the emotions this man drew out of your soul. Without even knowing he made you want to be the best version of yourself possible.

"What're you thinking of, my love?" Jungkook eventually questioned, unable to hold in his curiosity anymore. You would often do this, look at him without really saying it. While other people may have commented on it or thought it was a bit strange, he never did. Because he knew that when you were looking at him in that way, you were feeling all of the same things that he felt for you.

"You. I'm always thinking of you." You answered, causing that familiar feeling of butterflies in his stomach. No matter how long the two of you had been dating, one thing never changed. The magnitude of your feelings for each other. Most couples had honeymoon phases, losing the initial level of interest they had in each other once they got to know one another. But it wasn't that way for you and Jungkook. No, it had been the opposite. The closer you two grew together, the harder and deeper you fell. 

You were eventually snapped out of your reverie by the sensation of your boyfriend's fingers brushing against your cheek again. This time, intentional. You looked back up into his eyes as you felt this, seeing him looking right back down at you. A soft smile pulled at the corner of his lips when he noticed the slight flush on your cheeks in the soft blue light of the moon. To him, you were a masterpiece. There was no purpose in going to museums when he had the most beautiful sight right in front of him, everyday.

"God, I wish you knew how much I love you." He breathed out. You felt your flush deepen at those words. The thing that brought you the most amount of happiness was knowing that what Jungkook felt for you was the same. You were both two young adults hopelessly in love with each other, the two of you against the world forever. The promise ring on your right hand sealing in your future together.

After a few more moments existing in the silence together, the two of you were simultaneously leaning in for a kiss. If you had one last wish before you died, it would be to experience this. To feel his soft lips slot against yours and draw away all of your worries. To take you to a place where you didn't have to worry about anything. Where you could just exist with him; live without any doubts for the future or any regrets for the past.

The two of you kissed softly and gently, getting lost in the warmth you got from each other. At one point, the feeling of you two kissing was becoming too much. The music provided a soft melody, joined with the new sound of the two of your breaths becoming more rushed. Your hands becoming more curious the longer your lips stayed locked. It was impossible when everything you felt for each other was so strong. The fire fueled by being so close.

With a small hum, Jungkook's other hand had slipped under your shirt, holding onto your waist to gently pull you closer. Kissing you was a dream to him, and he wanted every bit of it you let him have. With you, he wanted to do all of the things that lovers do. He wanted to worship and admire every single square inch of your body, because it was what you deserved. He saw you as a goddess that walked the earth, and he got the opportunity to feel your love.

"Jungkook.." You softly whispered his name as you felt his hands beginning to caress the skin of your back. He had never heard a prettier noise. Your boyfriend's touches were making your body warm up, always so sensitive to even the smallest touches from him. Your heart was practically pounding out of your chest when he grabbed ahold of your waist and flipped your positions, his elbows on either side of your head and his knees resting on the outsides of yours.

"Shh... I know, pretty." Jungkook replied quietly. He wasted no more time in pulling the sleep shirt over your head, leaving your upper half exposed to him. His eyes took the time to slowly drag down your exposed skin, his pupils dilated and his lips slightly parted. He looked as if he was in awe as he took a mental picture of the sight of you, how you looked laying back against the sheets, your skin practically glowing cornflower blue.

You were about to get shy about the way that he was observing you at the moment, but any thoughts were quickly wiped from your mind when his lips landed on your neck. Your body shivered in an immediate reaction to his touch, feeling the way he smiled against your skin. His lips worked gently and slow, trailing kisses all across the skin. One of your hands had tangled into his hair, wanting to keep him in place.

His fingers were once again gently rubbing your waist as his wet kisses slowly began to travel down your body, wanting to appreciate every single curve and crevice of your body. Your breath hitched when his tongue began to trace your areola. He always loved paying attention to your breasts, loved the soft skin on them and the way that you moaned so angelically whenever he stimulated you here. Just as expected, he earned one of those moans when his lips latched around your nipple.

He sucked gently, always sure to move his hand to attend to the breast he wasn't paying attention to. He flattened his tongue to move directly against your skin, ever so gently grazing his teeth against your nipple and earning a tug on his hair that made him moan. He finally pulled back only to give your other breast the same exact treatment. Jungkook was always a giver, and he made sure that no spot of your body was left unattended.

After a minute or so of this, it had become too much from you. The pool of arousal between your legs was so severe that it was giving you an uncomfortable sensation. You pulled his head away from your chest, his eyes immediately looking up at you with concern, wondering if he had done anything wrong or accidentally hurt you.

"I'm fine, Koo. I just.. I need you now." You said in an almost pleading tone, feeling borderline desperate. The worry on his features dissolved and instead was replaced with a grin, although you could clearly see the desire in his eyes just as strong as you felt it. He had no complaints though, he would do anything you asked.

Without wasting another moment he was undressing himself, taking off his t-shirt and the pajama pants he'd been wearing. Leaving himself in just his black Calvin Klein boxers that was enough to make any woman drool at the sight. Yet, this man was the one practically drooling at you while he was gently pulling down both your shorts and panties. This was a sight that Jungkook would give up everything to see. He wouldn't trade you for all the fame and fortune in the world. He had won the lottery with you.

"You're so damn beautiful.." Jungkook said without much thought, his tatted hands moving to rest on your thighs. They massaged the flesh gently, taking the time to appreciate the softness of your thighs. It was always one of his favorite parts of you. He had spent countless times fixated on your thighs, kissing and touching them. But he knew that tonight, neither of you had much patience. So after a few moments, his hands gently spread your thighs open.

"Such a pretty little pussy as well. Why does every part of you have to be so perfect?" He added on once he got a sight of the mess between your legs. Your cheeks were flushed deep red at his words. He had always been blunt with his words and how he felt about you. Sometimes it made you feel light and happy, other times like now it only fueled the burning fire of desire you felt for your boyfriend.

Not wanting to spend any more time making you shy, he started to give you what you wanted. His middle finger slowly swiped down your pussy, all the way from the hood of your clit to your slit. His eyes watched in wonder as you clenched down on nothing, so desperate to have him inside of you. If it was his choice, he would spend hours doing this. If he knew that it wouldn't torture you, he could be here all day playing with you.

Even though he could tell that you wanted him right at that moment, he always made sure to prep you a little before. Sparing a few moments using his fingers was worth it when he could ease the pain that you felt when his cock initially split you open. The one thing he hated most was seeing you in pain, especially if it was something that he could've prevented. So even though he saw the anticipation burning in your eyes, he didn't give in yet.

Your whole body shuddered when his thumb pressed directly against your clit. He rubbed in slow, small circles. All focus on the way that your back slightly arched off the bed and your hole was desperately fluttering. Just the sight was enough to elicit a groan from him. You drove him absolutely crazy, just as he was doing to you. Even the slight touch of his finger was enough to make your whole body react.

"Jungkook, please-" You started to beg, but was cut off abruptly when you felt his index finger push past your entrance. A moan fell from your lips as you were finally feeling some of the stimulation that you wanted.

"Patience, darling. Let me stretch out you a bit, okay? You're doing so well already." Jungkook muttered. His finger slowly began to pump inside of you while his thumb continued to give attention to your puffy clit. One of the things he loved most was the way that you were always so receptive to everything he gave you. You were so reactive also, unafraid to show him just how good he could make you feel.

A little while later he added his middle finger to join. There was already a sheen layer of sweat covering your body due to everything you were feeling at the moment. He worked ever so gently, fingers slowly scissoring inside of you to try and stretch you out a bit more. He made sure to stimulate your clit the whole time, making it easier for you to open up for him. He spent a few minutes just doing this, fingers curling against the spongy spot he had memorized, just as every other part of your body was to him.

He had spent so many times doing this, that he knew every way your body reacted. He knew what every twitch looked like, every expression on your face. He never got tired of this. How could he ever get bored of watching the one person he loved so much falling apart due to his touch? It was a sight he would never lose.

The closer you came to your climax, the more vocal you became. There were moans coming from your mouth, mumbles of his name, small whimpers. It all rushed through his body and went straight to his already painfully hard erection. Even though it was borderline painful, he didn't mind waiting if it meant you were properly prepared for him.

He stared as your hips began to twitch, knowing your climax was close. He ever so slightly quickened the pace of his thumb against your clit and it was enough to send you over the edge. Your hands that had been resting on his shoulders dug into the skin as your whole body trembled with the force of your orgasm. In just minutes he had you falling apart on his fingers, unable to do anything else but call out for him as he continued to move his fingers inside of you, letting you ride out your high.

He finally pulled his fingers away when he felt the taps on his shoulder, knowing exactly what it meant. You shivered a little when his fingers slipped out of your pussy, his fingers wet with your essence. He wasted no time in bringing his fingers up to his mouth, tasting your release with a deep groan. Just the sight of your boyfriend sat back on his heels with his fingers in his mouth, cock straining his boxers, was enough to immediately turn you on again.

"I need you please, so bad.." You finally uttered after coming back from the overwhelming sensations he'd given to you. Your hands were already on the waistband of his boxers, his eyes intently staring you down as he pulled his clean fingers from his mouth. He watched as you pulled down his boxers, helping you remove them fully. He saw your reaction to the way his cock sprung up to gently hit his stomach, showing just how much he desired you.

You reached out for him immediately, wrapping one of your hands around the base of his erection, drawing out a quiet hiss from under his breath. You barely had time to slide your hand up before he was taking your hand away and pinning you back down to the bed. He looked down at you with so many emotions in his eyes. Love, affection, desire, lust. Everything that you felt for him completely mirrored.

"How could I ever resist you when you sound so pretty for me?" Jungkook questioned quietly, his knees pushing your thighs apart to nestle himself between your legs. His hands held both of yours, pinning them down to the bed. His eyes were locked onto yours, always wanting to stare right into the eyes of his lover as he showed just how much he felt for you.

One of his hands momentarily moved to take ahold of his throbbing cock, rubbing it against your entrance. You were both immediately moaning in your neediness. He knew that there was no way he would be able to last long, not when what he felt for you was so intense. Unable to take anymore of the torture, he finally aligned himself with your entrance, guiding his hips slowly to make sure he didn't hurt you.

"Oh my god, you're so perfect." Jungkook's face fell to the crook of your neck, having to use all of his strength to hold himself back from drilling into you. Your head fell back against the pillow when you felt his cock splitting you open, pushing past your entrance. Your walls were immediately pulsing around him and he swore that he was in heaven. Once he bottomed out he stayed still, free hand going down to rub small patterns into your clit to help you ease up, his lips kissing against the delicate skin of your neck.

"You can move now, please.." You whispered after getting used to the feeling of your boyfriend deep inside of you. His stimulation to your clit helped and now you were just desperate for him to make love to you in the same way he always did.

Jungkook immediately began to move at your permission, hips pulling almost all the way back before he thrusted back into you. Every slight movement of your body was enough to make his cock twitch. From only just a few moments he felt like he was so close to the edge. Every time he felt like he was about to orgasm he would slow down, edging himself to bring you more pleasure. You were always his first priority.

"This cunt is so sweet, baby. Made just for me, hm?" Jungkook asked as his hips rolled against yours. He worked at a steady pace, not wanting to rush things when everything felt so perfect. For once you two didn't have to rush in the fleeting moments during the day before you had things to get done. No, both of you were with each other in the light of the moon, without a worry of a single thing other than each other.

"Yes, Jungkook! Only for you.." You practically whimpered out, back arching and pussy clenching at his sweet praise. That was enough for him to practically lose control of himself. His hands gripped your thighs now, pushing them against your chest so he could reach even deeper into your insides.

"Fuck, that's right. Only for me. Such a good girl for me, aren't you?" His voice was becoming more high pitched, moans borderline raspy at this point. You sounded so sweetly to him, like an angel coming down to bless him personally. Sometimes he wondered if you were actually a dream, but these moments were too real for him. 

Your response to his words was a high pitched moan, nails desperately clutching at the sheets the deeper he forced his cock into you, the longer his finger quickly rubbed at your clit. It was all too much, yet you could never get enough of him, of what he gave you. You had always been his good girl, and you always would be. The love of his life, his darling. Every single word he fed to you just made you feel even closer to your climax.

"I love you so much, you know that right? N-never forget that.." Jungkook breathed out with a slight stutter, almost unable to think straight at this point. He was ruining himself right now by how hard he was holding back, his balls painfully aching every time he drove himself back into your sopping pussy.

The sound of your joined moans along with your cunt squelching with every single deep thrust was a melody to him that no other music could ever come close to. No sounds could give him the same amount of satisfaction and feelings as this did. He loved you with every single fiber of his being. He needed you even more than that.

"I l-love you too. I can't.." Your voice was so desperate at this point, unable to formulate any proper sentences. But he knew. He always did when it came to you. He could feel the way your whole body was trembling right now, he could see the way your eyebrows were pulled together and the way you were biting down on your bottom lip. You were close to your second orgasm, and he wanted nothing more than to fill you with all of his love.

"I know, darling. Want to feel you cream my cock. Come for me." Jungkook mumbled into your ear, almost unable to contain himself anymore. Giving you the final push as his lips crashed against yours, reaching your peak for the second time that night. Your body tensed up and thighs trembled, your lips parting in a silent moan.

The sight of you at the height of your pleasure was too much for Jungkook to bear. With a few sharp thrusts into your quivering pussy, he let out a prolonged groan as you felt his cum filling you in long spurts. His hips were pushed flush against yours, his cock quivering as he felt you milk him for all he was worth. 

As the both of you came down from your highs he lazily ground his hips against yours a few more times, letting the two of you come down slowly from your highs. Once the both of you winced at the feeling, he pulled out of you, cock now soft and covered in the mess the both of you created. He looked down at your hole, watching with interest as the mix of your cum was spilling from your entrance.

Fighting off the urge to push it back into your used pussy, he got up from the bed and walked into the bathroom, coming back with a rag to clean you up before any more of the cum got onto the bedsheets. Like always, he made sure to wipe the both of you down before getting back into the bed right next to you. Not bothering to get back dressed as he just wanted to hold you.

His arms immediately wrapped around you and pulled you closer, causing you to smile. Your body was exhausted but it was the best feeling. The pleasure was still running through your body. Even more importantly, you still felt all of the love from before. He never failed to make you feel loved and appreciated. Your boyfriend was amazing.

"I love you." You mumbled to him, smiling lightly at the song that came on, remembering the music the two of you had been listening to. The moon was still high in the sky, leaving the two of you with more time to lay together. More time to stay in your little bubble without any worries, no thoughts except ones of each other. Being in the comfort of knowing that you loved him, and he loved you just as much.

"I love you too."

in the morning, i'll love the mangled bits of you i'll love you when your lips turn cornflower blue

Hii! How are you doing? Can you please write hurt to comfort with Jungkook, when he walks out to cool off after an argument and Y/n thinks he left her? :)

i'm doing well, i hope you are too! i kinda got carried away on this request and wrote a lott of angst haha... (it hurt my heart)

never go to sleep angry - jjk.

summary: one of the most important rules of your relationship was to never go to sleep angry. when the rule was ignored, it led to an argument and a huge misunderstanding.

word count: 5.0k

genre/warnings: established relationship, a lot of angst, comfort, misinterpreting words, argument between them, y/n feels really shitty, mutual confusion, cute ending though

-- ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ --

There was one rule that you and Jungkook always had set up in your relationship. It was one of the reasons that you two were able to stay together for so long. How you had gotten through so many tough times, arguments, and disagreements. One thing that you two agreed on for the past 4 years you had been together.

Never go to sleep angry.

Even though it seems like something that may not matter too much, it had always worked for you two. Being in a relationship meant disagreeing on things. Relationships could be hard, but loving Jungkook was always easy. He made all of the hard times worth it. There weren't many things the two of you fully argued about because of this one rule. Communication was key in your relationship, and the two of you were always able to deescalate the situations so they wouldn't blow up.

It was the rule until now, it seemed.

If you had realized the way that you were making your boyfriend feel, it could've turned out so different. He hadn't spoke up about it because he knew how stressed you were. Later hours at a job meant that you didn't have time for the things you used to. After covid wiped through the world, your company had taken a huge hit. Budget cuts meant people being laid off of their jobs, and the ones that weren't fired got their work loads doubled, or even tripled.

Your job was a work at home -- returning late from work hadn't been the problem. Even if it was, Jungkook knew. He understood how consuming work could be, but he had been working crazy hours everyday since he was 13. He knew how his schedule worked and how to arrange things to make time between the two of you. This workload was new for you, and so he didn't get angry when you were stuck to your laptop for hours after your scheduled workday ended.

It was more of the way you dealt with the stress that got to him. Being stressed meant that you had been getting more irritable. If he tried talking to you when you were working, he was met with a dry "mhm" or a short look that told him you weren't interested. If he tried actually getting your attention, he would just receive snippy answers. He was trying to be understanding, but that also meant ignoring the most important rule of your relationship. Just like you tried to prevent, everything blew up.

"I've just been stressed out, Jungkook! I thought you said you understood!" You shouted at your boyfriend. What had turned into a simple conversation about him asking if you could spend your free day going on a date for the first time in a couple months had turned into this argument. You wanted to take the single free day off to rest your fingers from typing until your fingers locked up, he finally felt the festering irritation out, and it wasn't turning out pretty.

"I do understand, _____! If anyone does, it's me! You've been thinking about yourself this whole time! I try to be nice, I try to be understanding. You just shut me out! Just because you're stressed out or having a hard time doesn't mean you're allowed to treat me this shitty!" You were almost speechless as you listened to him vent to you about his feelings. You had been trying to justify yourself, but the longer this argument continued, the more you realized how you had been treating him.

"I tried so hard. You only try to push me away now. I've always had draining schedules, but I never took it out on you. I knew that this whole thing was new for you, I gave you time to adjust. But I just can't stand this anymore!" Jungkook groaned, putting his face in his hands. You had become ignorant about how your boyfriend felt, trying too hard to explain why you were treating him this way. He had enough of this. You were angry right now, and anger led to you being irrational.

He knew that he needed to get out of the house before the two of you said anything else you regretted. He didn't want the two of you to be blinded by anger and the best thing to do was to cool down. He tried to take in a deep breath as he turned around to walk towards the coat rack. You watched in disbelief as he started to put on his coat and lace up his shoes. Was he really walking out on the argument?

"Are you serious right now!? You started this argument, and now you're just trying to walk away from it?!" You accused him, crossing your arms over your chest. All Jungkook did was shake his head to himself. If you wanted to be petty, then it was only fair for him to do the same. He wasn't going to let himself be a personal punching bag anymore.

"You're right, I am walking away. I can't do this, ______. Get your shit together." You only scoffed at what he said, rolling your eyes in annoyance. Too consumed by your own pride, you didn't say anything as he left, didn't try to stop him. If he wanted to walk out, that was his problem. You felt like you had an excuse for the way you had been. You hadn't even realized how badly your treatment had gotten.

You spent most of the day grouchy now, too sidetracked to focus on your work. The argument happened pretty early in the afternoon, meaning you got most of the day to think about it. You knew he was going to come back before it was bedtime, or at least you thought you knew. Because it had been the most important rule, right? So you spent the whole day trying to formulate an argument to use against him.

The longer you thought about it though, the more uneasy you felt about the situation. It was growing later and later with every passing minute, and there was no sign of your boyfriend. No text or call, no jingling of his keys in the doorway, not even a text from his brother asking what had happened. Him and his brother were very close. He was usually the person Jungkook went to whenever you got into arguments, and his brother had even helped the two of you. He always texted when Jungkook showed up at his place, but there were no notifications.

You had already taken your nightly shower and was sitting on the bed in silence, huffing to yourself. He was being too petty, you thought. Why couldn't he just understand that you were busy? He was one of the busiest people in the world after all, he should be understanding that you didn't have hours of the day to dedicate to your relationship anymore like you used to be able to do.

While stuck in your thoughts, you sort of froze. He was one of the busiest people in the world. He had countless shoots for music videos, songs, magazines, variety shows. Your boyfriend was a member of one of the most renowned music bands. He spent almost everyday practicing and even spent nights in the studio trying to perfect things. If anyone knew what it was like to live a busy life, it would be him. You'd seen how busy his schedules, how full they were. He had something almost everyday. 

Yet he still made time for you.

You recounted all the times he had come home tired from work or exhausted from a performance. The days he returned with a frustrated or irritated expression from something that happened at work. Not one of those times did he ever take it out on you. He never let things that happened outside your relationship affect how he treated you. Before covid happened, he would be gone even more. Even though he had more time after the pandemic, things were getting back into motion.

He shared how overwhelmed he had been with everything. 2020 had been a break that he didn't even know he needed. He loved his fans, loved his band. But even then, he was still human. Not a machine that could work and be pushed through his schedules. When everything shut down, it meant him also being locked in his house and quarantined from everything. Now that there had been vaccinations and the urgency of the virus had died down, he was thrown right back into everything he had gotten used to being away from.

He had an album releasing soon, and it was taking a lot from him to get back into the flow of things. But he never blamed you for it. Before your job had you working crazy hours, he never got angry whenever you called him during his practices or came to surprise him at his workplace, taking away from his rehearsal time. Because it wasn't your fault for wanting to spend time with him or see him.

A pit was beginning to form in your stomach as you stared down at your lap. All of those times where you interrupted him from his work, you never realized how frustrating it could feel. Not until now when you were also working hard to produce quality work. You thought about all of the times he might've been irritated because he was trying to practice or so close to getting something right, and you came to stop him.

Yet every time he saw you, he was so excited and treated you with love. Even if you were distracting him from his job of performing in front of millions, even billions. Yet you had been doing the exact opposite. You were blaming him for wanting to spend time with you. Mad at him just because he wanted some time with his girlfriend. Fuck, you had been an idiot. Created an unnecessary argument just because you forgot to appreciate him.

You immediately reached for your phone, pressing the contact at the top of your favorites list. It was late now, almost 9pm, and you were worried. You wanted to at least see when he was coming home so you could be sure to stay up until then. You wanted to follow through with your number one rule and wait for him. You wanted to be waiting by the door when he came through to apologize to him.

Frowning when the call immediately went to voicemail, you were almost sent into a stupor. He always answered your calls, no matter what. It was strange for the phone go straight into voicemail, because in his car he always had a phone charger. One quick glance out of your window was the confirmation you needed, he did take his car. 

He had his charger with him. Did that mean he was ignoring your calls then? The phone didn't even ring before it went to voicemail, quicker than any person could decline a call. You weren't someone who worried too easily, but whenever something didn't feel right it made you extremely anxious. This was one of those moments right now. There was something off about the whole situation and you didn't know.

You tried his phone at least two more times, and the same thing happened. Not even a single ring. Every time you were met with the voicemail the two of you had recorded together a couple years ago, the giggling one you recorded with him saying that if he wasn't answering the call, he was probably too busy with his beautiful girlfriend. Your heart hurt when you heard that. How much things had changed scared you.

You went to text him, sending a few messages asking if he was okay. You stared down at the notice that the message had failed to send, the frown in your face getting even deeper. You went back into your contacts app, calling his brother instead. To your short relief, the phone was ringing. But after a few long rings, the phone also went to voicemail. You felt the urge to throw your phone at the wall but instead just cursed under your breath.

You weren't even sure how slow or fast the time was passing right now. All you could do was blankly stare down at your phone, hoping for a call. Had the argument been that bad? Was he really not going to come home after 4 years of sticking to that rule? The clock was nearing 12AM now and you were fidgeting nervously. Going over the argument over and over in your mind again. One particular line suddenly caught your attention.

"You're right, I am walking away. I can't do this, ______."

Your heart practically dropped as you remembered that. It was something you overlooked in the moment because you had been so angry with him, so consumed by your own pride. Those were words he never said to you. Sure, he had left the house a few times to cool down when arguments got too heated. But he would always leave with a reminder that he would be back before dark, that he was going to his brother's house.

Did you really ruin the relationship? All because you had been too focused on your work? You could feel your heart beginning to pound in your chest. He told you that he was walking away from you, that he wasn't going to do this anymore. This, as in the relationship? And you didn't do a thing to stop him when he left. You were so stupid.

Now all of the worst thoughts were going through your mind. Any rationality was leaving you. The calls weren't going through still. Had he blocked you? That was the only conclusion you were believing at the moment. You had been treating him like he was a nuisance for the past few months even though he had always been nothing but loving towards you no matter how crazy his schedule became.

You had been ignoring him whenever he wanted to do something with you or tell him something that had happened during his work. You had taken the small amount of free days you got and spent time relaxing and focusing on yourself rather than spending time with the person you loved more than anything, the person who loved you more than anything. You forgot that a relationship was about loving someone even through hard times.

Any hope you had for yourself was draining as you dug yourself into an even deeper hole. You were someone who worried a lot, but it was something that Jungkook had always helped you work out. Without him here, the problems were coming right back. Especially because this was about him. You had been an asshole of a girlfriend and he had enough. He left, walked out, and blocked you.

All of the years in your relationship felt like they were coming back at once. All of the years you spent together. Loving each other unconditionally. You comforting him whenever he was anxious and insecure, him surprising you with date nights or coming home from trips early to spend time with you. Spending his free days surprising him with things like his favorite dinner. You guys argued as well, but it was what happened in any healthy relationship.

This didn't feel like an argument anymore. Usually they would be resolved, this just felt like the end. You were a shitty girlfriend and he could probably find anyone much better. There were so many girls out there who admired him like a god, who would treat him as such. Girls who didn't take who they got for granted until it was too late and they had already gone.

He left. He was really gone. Those words kept repeating in your mind, and yet it felt like everything was a dream. It felt like you couldn't breathe at the moment. You were the reason this happened. The panic attack was coming quicker than you could stop it, and it was hitting at full force. The clock read 2AM by now. You had been sitting in the bed since 8PM waiting for him to walk into the bedroom. He wasn't coming.

Your whole world was crashing in on itself. Tears were welling up inside your eyes as you laid back on the bed, not feeling enough strength to hold yourself upright again. As you laid down on the bed, you were greeted with the smell of your boyfriend. Was he even your boyfriend anymore? His scent flooded your senses, the familiar smell you'd grown to love so much over the years. It was your breaking point.

With shaky hands you grabbed the blanket, hugging it to your body as the sobs started. Your whole body was trembling with them, curled up as you tried desperately to grasp onto what you felt like was the last of your relationship. The only thought in your mind was that all of this was your fault. Like the ignorant person you were, you lost the most important person to you.

You felt like you would do anything to fix this. To just get one more chance to see him. You would beg at your knees if you needed. Anything to promise him that you would be a better girlfriend to him. But he wasn't going to give you another chance. You only realized now how insignificant your work seemed when he left you. You'd been too distracted by your work that you forgot about the one thing that was more important.

You wanted to do so many things. Scream, throw your laptop at the wall, go out and look for him. But you just couldn't. The realization you felt, the pit in your stomach, the overwhelming sense of guilt. It was all too much for you to move a single limb. You felt overly nauseous, like you would throw up if you moved. 

You weren't someone that was completely dependent on Jungkook. You didn't need him to go about your day correctly. You could spend time apart with him. It was something you actually got used to with him going off on tours. But at this moment, it felt like your world was caving in on you. He was the one person who was always there for you no matter what, and now you had to come to terms with that changing. You sobbed even harder as you realized that.

This was the state that Jungkook saw as he walked back into the house. He knew that he had been gone for a long time, well over 12 hours. He had been cooling off by himself. He didn't even know how long he'd been out. His brother had been gone on vacation, meaning that he didn't have a place to go to. He didn't want to bother his bandmates with his relationship problems, so he could only think of one thing.

He spent the whole day hiking. One of the things he had done as a child growing up in Busan, it was something that helped him clear his mind. He drove a couple hours to the mountains and spend a big majority of the day in the nature. He had no service when he was out there, which helped him refrain from calling you before he had the opportunity to sort out his thoughts.

It had been well past nightfall when he got back down the mountain and he hadn't even realized how late it was. Not until he gained his signal back after he spent even longer at the small village by the bottom of the mountain. He had spent quite a while speaking to some of the elders that he lost track of time and saw it was nearly midnight. He had quickly said goodbye and promised to visit again before leaving.

It was only when he had gotten back onto the main highway that his signal returned and the notifications flooded his phone. He frowned as he looked at all of the missed calls from you, the worried texts. Your most recent one was the most concerning one, one that you had sent just twenty minutes prior.

"i'm sorry i was so shitty. i can pack all of my stuff and be gone in the morning."

He was confused as to why you were texting him that. Why were you packing your stuff and talking about leaving? He tried to call you multiple times, but none of the calls picked up. His own panic was building up as he stepped on the gas, speeding more than he would've liked to admit. It was a two hour drive back and right now he was cursing himself for picking a place so far away. 

You usually never called or texted him when you were separated to cool down from arguments, so he knew that something was different this time. He couldn't think of what was different this time, what had happened that led to you saying that you would be packing up to leave. Was he too harsh on you? Should he have just pushed the problem off even more?

You didn't even register the sound of the door opening, too consumed by your grief. Jungkook had rushed into the apartment, looking around for you. He checked the living room first, and then went straight to the bedroom. He stopped completely in his tracks when he saw you. Curled up on the bed into a ball, clutching your shared blanket to your chest, shaking with quiet and violent sobs.

For a few moments he could do nothing but stare at the sight. Wondering if he really had been too hard on you. He didn't think that his words were too harsh when he was saying them. He had only been speaking his feelings. But as he watched you right now, he felt his heart shattering. He never wanted this. He regretted ever saying anything.

You jumped as you felt a hand lay on your shoulder. Your eyes were swollen from all of your crying, you could barely make out the sight of Jungkook knelt down beside you, frowning with immense concern. You almost couldn't believe that he was right in front of you. Your sobs died down a bit as the two of you stared. You were the first one to break down.

"J-Jungkook, I'm so sorry. I was too consumed with my work and I didn't realize how shitty I treated you. You were right. You've always been so busy with work and you never treated me the way I treated you. I was so stressed by my job that I let it out on you. I was such a bad girlfriend, and I understand why you don't want to be with me anymore. I'm just sorry I didn't notice how bad I was." The way you spoke with small sniffles almost broke his heart and distracted him from what you said.

After he processed his words, his frown only deepened. Why were you speaking to him like this? Saying that you would pack all of your stuff, that he didn't want to be with you anymore, that you were a bad girlfriend? All of his anger was completely gone now and at the moment he just felt extremely confused along with distraught from how destroyed you looked.

"Baby, what are you talking about? Why are you saying all of this?" Jungkook asked with pure bewilderment in his tone. This made you look back at him with an equally confused expression. You weren't expecting this response from him. He seemed like he genuinely didn't know what you were talking about and it made you question everything.

"But.. you blocked me. You said that.. that you couldn't do this and were walking away?" You questioned, your voice cracking with how weak it was after sobbing. Jungkook tilted his head a bit as he tried to recall when he ever said that. After going through the argument in his head, the realization hit him. His eyes widened as he recalled what he said in the heat of the moment. He hadn't clarified what he meant and you had been left alone for however many hours thinking that he had ended the relationship.

"______, I know how those words seemed, but that's not at all what I meant. I was saying that I couldn't do the argument, not the relationship. I would never end things off. I only said I was walking away so I could cool off." Jungkook explained as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Not at all irritated by you, but instead angry at himself. He had only said what he was feeling in the heat of the moment and left.

"What about your phone..? None of my calls went through." You asked him, your voice still full with hurt and doubt. He felt terrible for even making you think for a moment that he wanted to end the relationship. Even though he had been pissed off, he would never end the relationship like that in the heat of the moment. Even enraged he knew it would be the worst mistake he would ever make.

"I went to the mountains to hike and get everything off my mind. My brother is on vacation so that's why I didn't go to him. The place I went had no service and so none of the calls or texts could've gotten through." He told you, and your eyes slightly widened. He was really telling the truth? He didn't want to break up with you? At this point you just felt like you had fallen asleep and this was all a dream.

To confirm this was real, you couldn't hold yourself back anymore and reached out for him, and he wasted no time. He sat down on the bed next to you and pulled you right into his arms. Your body froze as you felt his familiar warmth, smelled his scent with the addition of the smell of nature he'd been around all day. This was real. He wasn't leaving you.

The tears instantly started falling from your eyes, but it was different this time. It was relief. You spent so long crying because you thought he had broken up with you, but it all ended up being a misunderstanding. He wasn't leaving you and you had nothing to worry about. In the past 12 hours it felt like your life had completely ended, but it hadn't.

Jungkook held you closely to him, his fingers carding through your slightly tangled hair while his other hand rubbed small circles into your back. He rested his head on the top of yours, knowing that it was better for you to just get all of your feelings out. Even though nothing made him feel worse than knowing he was the reason that you were crying like this, it was better for you to just let it all out so it didn't bottle up. He had been doing that for the past few months and it turned out like this.

You didn't know how long you had been laying like that in his arms, but when you were finally able to stop crying, you noticed the beginnings of light peeking through the windows. The whole time Jungkook was there for you, whispering sweet things to help you calm down. How much he loved you, how he wasn't going to leave you, that he wasn't angry with you. Anything he could think of to help you calm down.

When you finally had a level enough mind to fully process everything, you felt so much relief. But you still felt the same guilt from before. You were the one that disregarded what he felt and now he was comforting you after an argument that was your fault. You needed to say something to him, to apologize and promise that you would be better. There was no way that you were ever going to let your work consume you again.

"I know I already said this, but I want to say that I'm so sorry. I was so stressed out with my new hours that I got angry and irritated whenever you just wanted to spend time with me. I never should've done that and I realize now how much I took you for granted. You've always made the time for me and I should've done the same for you. I know now how wrong and unfair I was being to you, and I want to be better." You said to him, your voice filled with regret.

Jungkook smiled lightly when he heard your apology. There was no longer any anger in his eyes. No resentment. To him, that was all in the past now. He could hear the sincerity in every word you said. After all, this was the reason that he had started dating you. You were so sweet and considerate towards others. You just needed to realize what you were doing wrong. You were distracted and didn't know you were bring rude.

"It's okay, my love. I know how stressful it's been for you and I'm not angry anymore. I understand how you feel and I accept your apology. I know you didn't realize how you were treating me." Jungkook replied, putting his fingers under your chin so he could tilt your head up to look at him. Even with your red, puffy eyes and runny nose you were so beautiful to him. He gently kissed the tip of your nose before resting his forehead against yours.

"I love you so much. Thank you for always being the best." You mumbled, closing your eyes as you took the time to let yourself bask in the moment. Letting go of all doubts that you felt previously. There was no reason to dwell on this argument, because you knew that you wouldn't make this mistake anymore going on.

"I love you too, always. No matter what happens." Jungkook replied with a bit of reassurance in his tone. You smiled as he said those words to you, leaning forward to close the small gap between the two of you. You were fully calmed down as your lips met and any thoughts that you had melted away in the moment. Everything was okay in this moment. 

Even though this argument had been rough, the two of you had stuck to your most important rule. The two of you went to sleep shortly afterwards, no more feelings of anger or resentment. You would never go to bed angry anymore, realizing just how important that rule was.

best friends..? ❀ new perfume

→ character pairing : best friend!Jungkook x fem!reader → drabble summary : in which you use a new perfume scent and jungkook is appalled. → word count : 2.2k → warnings : confusing feelings, both of them extremely flustered, jk's lisp mentioned hehe, jungkook is literally so cute in this PLEASE, unedited → genre(s) : fluff, crack → note : hii! i'm sorry i was inactive, i went through a block and couldn't find any motivation. anyways, let me know if u guys think i should do a mini series of scenarios like this :)) also if u want, lmk what you guys think of no capitalization, i tried something new → edit : this was made into a series due to requests!!

SERIES MASTERLIST

you loved your best friend with all of your heart. you had been friends with him since birth practically, the result of having mothers who were also best friends. they had even started trying for pregnancy around the same time in hope of having children that could also grow up together. it was a miracle for them when they got pregnant within a whole month of each other, and an even bigger one when they found out that their children were opposite genders.

you both always knew what your parents wanted from the two of you. they had grown up always putting you guys together, almost never having a day where you didn't see each other. it was even easier for your parents since you lived in the same apartment building. only a single elevator ride away, and your parents were constantly sending you off together or to go outside and play together.

not that either of you minded. you both grew up to be close just like your parents wanted, but also not in the exact way that your parents wanted. you never developed a romantic relationship with each other. they were even worried at this point, the both of you 20 years old and sharing an apartment together to go to the same college. how could nothing happen between the two of you?

your parents had even been sure to raise the two of you to be affectionate to each other. hugs, cuddling, and kisses on the cheek were normal for the two of you. nobody else saw your relationship as "just friends" because of how close you were. jungkook only ever had one girlfriend in your last year of high school. they'd dated for two months before you met her. the moment jungkook greeted you with a kiss on the cheek was all she needed to flip out.

you didn't blame her, honestly. growing up, you didn't realize how unusual your physical contact was with each other for people who are only friends. it was only in middle school and shipping became a thing for you to realize. nobody did that with their best friends. they always ended up dating.

but you convinced yourself otherwise. you and jungkook hadn't dated each other in all of these years, so these people had to be wrong. even though every guy knew specifically to stay away from "jungkook's girl", and no girl could ever get through to "your man".

after that one incident with jungkook's now ex-girlfriend, the two of you seemed to come to an agreement. neither of you dated anyone, never wanted anyone to come between your friendship. they would only try to come between the two of you, and you never wanted to let each other go. it wasn't your fault after all, nobody else just understood that friends of opposite genders could be this close and not have feelings... right?

"_____, hurry up! this is like the first free day we've had in weeks, lets go out already!" jungkook complained with a small whine. this was because you were currently in the bathroom, taking your sweet time getting ready for precisely the reason he just said. it was the first time the two of you had a day that wasn't plagued with any classes or homework. you wanted to look nice.

"i won't be much longer!" you called out through the bathroom door, hearing a dramatic groan all the way from the living room. you just chuckled as you looked back into the mirror, focusing back in on your eyeliner. you didn't usually have time to do your makeup like this, so you wanted to be precise about it. once you were finally satisfied with your makeup you leaned back, smiling at yourself.

you almost forgot that you could look this nice. wearing a flowery sundress with your favorite jewelry, even your hair done nicely which was rare for you these days. your makeup had been touched up perfectly with glitter on your eyelids and a lip color that perfectly matched your skin tone. it had been a very long time since you felt this pretty. you felt ready for the picnic now.

even though jungkook's had a rather alternative aesthetic which was compromised of only wearing dark clothes, having multiple piercings and tattoos, the rbf.... he was actually a sucker for cute things. he had actually been the one to come up with the picnic idea, excitedly sharing the idea with you once he had seen it on tiktok. there was no way you could deny the opportunity for food and taking good photos. he had even cooked all the food (save from you baking all of the baked goods) and bought a picnic basket to make it authentic.

you were subconsciously smiling to yourself as you reached for your usual signature perfume. you weren't really paying attention as your sprayed it on yourself... only to realize that nothing was coming out of it. you finally looked down and noticed that the bottle was completely empty. how had you missed that? usually you always noticed when you were getting low. you wouldn't be surprised if it slipped your mind though, exams were coming up and you were distracted.

you decided not to dwell on the empty perfume bottle - you didn't want anything to ruin the day you had planned. so instead you opened up your closet and took out a small sample perfume you had gotten in a gift basket from one of your friends. the scent was a bit different than your usual flowery, light smell. this one was sweeter, smelling more of vanilla and coconut. you didn't mind the scent, it just wasn't your thing.

you could still hear jungkook mumbling to himself about you taking too long, so you decided to just have mercy on him and not take any longer. all you had to do was put on your necklace. it was one jungkook had gotten for you on christmas the previous year. a silver necklace with a butterfly embellished with diamonds. you always told jungkook to never spend that much on you, but he was a happy spender. to be honest you were too, but his reaction was just too priceless when he unwrapped the new ps5 you bought him.

you almost forgot how impossible clipping a necklace was on when you had your nails done. you had your nails natural for so long that after getting acrylics a few days ago, you had forgotten how to operate with long nails again. luckily, you had someone who would definitely be eager to help with how much he wanted to leave.

"kook, come into the bathroom and help me put this necklace on! we can leave afterwards." you almost immediately heard footsteps slamming down the hallway, showing just how much of a rush he was in. he opened the door and you could already recognized the look of slight irritation, though you didn't mind. he would just have to wait, because you weren't going to hurry up.

"thank god, i think the food was molding while i was waiting for you." jungkook commented as he took the necklace from your hands. he was frowning as he said this but the moment you laughed, his expression melted and he was already smiling along with you. his eyes softened at the sight of the necklace he'd bought you. you wore it everyday. he thought it was adorable.

"okay, okay.. just put the damn necklace on before you grow any more gray hairs." you chuckled a little as you watched him move behind you through the mirror. he put the necklace around your neck and hooked it up almost instantly, already having his experience with helping you.

growing up with a girl as a best friend meant that he practically knew everything. how to do your hair, help you with jewelry, he even had the exact brand and size of pads you used memorized in case you ever told him you needed extras.

once he finished hooking the necklace, his eyes met yours through the mirror. his smile became even softer as he finally took the time to look at you. you looked beautiful right now, just how he thought you looked beautiful all the time. no matter how you were dressed or how you looked. he was never afraid to communicate this to you either, because it just felt normal when you two were raised to be so affectionate.

"you look so pretty. this is the new dress you ordered a couple weeks ago?" jungkook asked in a calmer tone, seeming to forget about his earlier hastiness now that he was able to look at you. you felt his hand gently brush your shoulder before it moved down your arm, and finally rested on your hip. touching you always helped him feel calm, no matter the time or place.

"mhm. i was waiting for an opportunity to wear it. i thought i wouldn't have a reason to do so, but luckily your usually stupid tiktok ideas were good." you answered, giggling when you saw the attitude return to his expression momentarily in the form of an eyeroll. jungkook leaned forward to rest his chin on your shoulder, something he had done ever since you were young.

"they aren't stupid, you clearly just don't get the... vision..." jungkook had been speaking sarcastically, but you watched as his nose twitched a bit and his speech faltered.

one thing about jungkook was that he was very keen on smells. he was very sensitive to them, and he only really loved a few scents. one of them was the smell of your perfume. so it was easy for him to realize that you weren't wearing it anymore. before you could ask what was wrong, he was already speaking again.

"you smell weird." jungkook said simply, looking up at you through the mirror with question in his eyes. why would you ever change your perfume scent when it was so heavenly? it was one of jungkook's comfort smells, his favorite aroma (other than the smell of your natural skin). not that he didn't like this scent, it just wasn't you.

you were about to reply with something witty, but you froze as jungkook practically shoved his face into your neck. you could feel him sniffing more deeply now, feeling the tip of his nose brushing against your skin. you immediately felt goosebumps rising on your arms, and it wasn't from the colder temperature of the house due to the AC.

"why did you switch perfumes?" jungkook questioned with a slightly apprehensive tone. he couldn't help it. he had always associated the flowery perfume with you. he felt slightly upset with this new scent. he couldn't just get used to you changing your scent when you had been using your old perfume since you first got gifted it at age 10.

"i uh.. i just ran out of my old perfume." you muttered, slightly rolling your eyes at how stupid you sounded. you couldn't help it when you could feel his lips brushing against your neck every time he spoke. he didn't even seem to notice this either, too busy scrutinizing this smell.

"i'll buy you a new one when we go out. i'll buy as many as you want." jungkook almost immediately replied, already formulating the plan in your head. as soon as you finished the picnic, the two of you were going to take a trip to the store and he would buy you two of the biggest bottles they had just so you never had to put a single other scent on your body. he would deal with this scent for now, but as soon as you got back he was forcing you into the shower.

"okay..." you said quietly, your voice sounding a bit strained as you spoke. jungkook was relieved to hear that, and now that his internal crisis was averted he finally noticed the state you were in.

he was about to ask why you were so stiff, but then he noticed the way you shivered a little when his lips accidentally brushed against your neck. he realized how close he was, how his hold on you had tightened and how your back was pressed into his chest.

he backed away from you as if he had gotten shocked by you, muttering out an apology immediately. he thought you were uncomfortable by what he did, but he had no idea that the real reason for your current state was anything but you being uncomfortable.

you were flustered instead. it flustered you knowing that your best friend had gotten that close to you.. and you enjoyed it. you two were obviously comfortable being physical together, but his touch had never been so intimate.

he was blushing as well, you realized as you looked at him. this time in person rather than through the mirror. he was already staring back at you but the moment you made eye contact, he averted his gaze.

"i'll uh- i'll be waiting in the car with the stuff. come out when you're ready." jungkook forced out the words, almost stumbling over them. you noticed that he was so flustered and embarrassed that his lisp was a lot more prominent. something that would make you smile fondly if it weren't for the unfamiliar warmth in your body.

he rushed out of the bathroom quickly after that, leaving you in the bathroom with nothing but the lingering feeling of his lips on your neck.

you weren't dense enough to ignore the fact that the feeling you had wasn't something you would normally feel for your best friend. but you were too dense to realize that jungkook was sitting in the car, feeling the exact same way.

end. ♥

best friends..? ❀ first kiss

→ character pairing : best friend!Jungkook x fem!reader → drabble summary : in which you two decide to share your first kiss together, because best friends do everything together... right..? → word count : 2.7k → warnings : foul language, slight toxicity/jealousy (maybe), conflicting feelings, unedited → genre(s) : fluff, crack, slight angst → note : i made this a series due to requests :) since the chapters aren't connected you can read this without having read the first installment but it's recommended you read "new perfume" first for background info!!

SERIES MASTERLIST

one thing that nobody knew about you and jungkook was that you shared your first kiss together. why? because it would only worsen the rumors about you two that were already bad enough. everyone always shipped you two, and if this kiss was something that ever got out, things would get much worse.

it seemed simple. you were stupid teenagers, two sixteen year olds. but it also wasn't that simple.

"jungkook, come on!" you impatiently whisper-shouted, grabbing the hand of your best friend to forcefully pull him out of your bedroom. your victim was still half asleep, subject to you shaking him awake just moments earlier.

jungkook was a bit (very) grumbly since you had woken him up from his slumber. who wouldn't be angry when they got woken up during the middle of the night, especially since he had just been so comfy using you as his pillow? but of course he had no choice, there was no way he could just roll back over and go to sleep when he saw the excited look on your face.

one of your favorite things during the winter was snow. it was so beautiful and you could just sit for hours watching it. lucky for you, in the apartment building the two of you lived in, there was an accessible roof. ever since you had discovered it one day when the two of you were playing in the stairwell it sort of became your spot. the two of you would sneak up there countless times without the knowledge of your parents.

tonight there had been a forecast on the weather channel that it was supposed to snow tonight. the first snow of the winter. even though the weather lady didn't specify what time it would start, you had already planned to stay up for it. you had witnessed the first snow of every year since you were 10 and that wasn't a streak you wanted to break.

jungkook had offered to stay up with you but as expected he'd succumbed to sleep 5 minutes into the movie you two chose. the way he was cuddling you made it very tempting to just doze off with him, but you didn't. you needed to stay up. so after hours of finding stupid movies to watch on your TV, it finally started snowing just a quarter past 04:00.

you had immediately shook jungkook in a not-so-gentle way, almost shoving him off of you so you could rush to put your sweatpants and winter jacket on. after taking a few moments to remember where the fuck he was, jungkook was following in your steps. he was pretty sure he put his sweatpants on backwards, but he had no time to worry about it when you started tugging him down the hallway.

"slow down, ______. you're going to wake your parents before we can make it out of the apartment." jungkook spoke in a quiet tone, getting a proper grasp of your hand so he could tug you backwards and slow you down a bit. you flashed him what seemed like an annoyed glance in the almost pitch black room but ended up slowing down.

once you got to the front door he went ahead and slipped into his boots, reaching for yours before you had a chance to do it yourself. he helped you into the shoes and tied them for you to make sure you didn't leave them untied in your haste and trip over your own feet. the whole time he was doing this you watched him, fighting the adoring smile that was trying to surface on your lips.

he made sure you were properly bundled up, putting earmuffs and gloves on your hands since he knew you'd want to stay outside for a while to watch the snow fall. you were someone who always forgot to take care of yourself, so jungkook was the one who did it for you. ever since he had gotten out of his aggressive adolescence phase around the age 14, he seemed to fall into a sort of caretaker role. it wasn't his fault that you were so clumsy all the time, or you would forget meals since you were too busy watching your stupid adorable cat compilation videos.

after the two of you had on all of your winter attire, he finally opened up the door as quietly as possible so you two could sneak out. the moment he shut the front door to your apartment, you were already grabbing his hand and running again, this time straight towards the stairwell. he let out a slight yelp of surprise when he felt his arm being tugged roughly. you always got so eager when you were excited about things.

"hurry up, we need to get outside before it stops!" you exclaimed as you launched up the stairs, taking it two at a time. just as he expected, that energy didn't last very long. your apartment level was pretty low compared to how many floors the apartment building had, and climbing 9 flights of stairs was extremely exhausting. by the time you were at the top you were leaning on top of jungkook and heaving breaths.

"what happened to hurrying up, huh?" jungkook questioned with a twinge of playfulness in your tone, smirking when he saw the way you glared at him. your cheeks were flushed and hair awry, lips pulled into a small frown. he knew what would cheer you up so he placed his hand on your back, opening the door that led to the rooftop. you two were instantly greeted by the falling snow. it was a pretty heavy snowstorm, already a few inches on the floor.

just as expected, you immediately brightened up once you saw the view outside. no matter how many times you'd seen it snow, it never got any less beautiful. you walked out onto the rooftop and looked up at the sky, admiring the sight of the snow falling. this was one of your favorite parts of living in the north, you were able to watch the snow practically every week.

the two of you walked to the little spot you both had constructed years ago, a makeshift canopy tent with a disney princess comforter on the floor that you two had stolen from your room and then spent an hour trying to convince your parents that the dog ate it. (they didn't believe that, obviously) it was definitely not a very pretty sight, but it worked for the two of you, nobody else ever visited the roof. the owners of the building probably had no idea that the door was actually unlocked.

the two of you sat down under the canopy to be able to see the snow without it falling on the both of you. as the two of you situated next to each other, you ended up with your head rested against his shoulder while he held his arm around you, his gloved hand rubbing your bicep. it felt so peaceful in this moment that he felt like he could fall asleep sitting upright, so he decided to just start talking.

the two of you never ran out of things to talk about. even though you had practically talked about everything since the two of you grew up together, you still could just converse for hours. because you two never seemed to get tired of each other. if anything, being together was energizing. you could never get tired of his melodic voice and laugh just like he would never be annoyed by the cute rants you always went on.

"i don't know, i just feel like if my girlfriend had a guy who was a best friend i would get jealous." jungkook said with a small shrug. your random conversations always got the two of you to some strange places, and tonight it had seemed the conversation had deviated to relationships. you were never really sure how your conversations evolved into the ones they did, but it was just where boredom got you.

"do you know how hypocritical you sound? you're saying that when you have a best friend who's the opposite gender." you replied with an incredulous look. jungkook just shrugged at that, although he didn't seem to take back what he said.

"i guess so. that's probably the reason i haven't had a relationship yet." he spoke quietly and you had to pretend that you didn't feel your heart break a little when you immediately registered the slight sadness in his voice.

it was hard to be a teenager and have every single girl curve you just because he had a girl best friend. he hadn't had a single romantic interaction because practically everyone in town knew about your friendship and always assumed it was something more than that. the only time he had even held hands with a girl was in the second grade. other than that, every other girl just avoided interacting with him.

he knew it was the same with you too, knew that you hadn't been asked out to a school dance or had one of those cringe middle school relationships that all of your other girl friends liked to joke around about. while every single one of your friends had a guy to gossip about, you always just sat there and listened. there were a few instances where your friends told you that a certain guy said you were cute but he wasn't going to ask you out because they didn't want to get their ass beaten by jungkook.

you honestly didn't blame them too much, since jungkook was pretty intimidating. despite that though, he wouldn't beat someone up just for asking you out. no, he would only beat them up if they ever dared to treat you wrong. maybe that was why any other boy was too intimidating to approach you. because nobody would ever be able to treat you up to jungkook's standard aside from himself. he hadn't trusted anyone else with you.

that didn't change the fact that you both felt bad for each other though. you were both missing out on a fundamental part of life. having your first significant other, first love, first kiss. the two of you were yet to experience any of that, and part of you wondered if you would ever possibly find someone who could accept the friendship you shared with jungkook. based on your luck for the past 16 years, you would guess that the answer was a no.

"i mean, i haven't either. not even my first kiss." you shrugged a bit. jungkook already knew this of course, since he would've been the first person you'd tell if it happened. he knew you were just saying this to make him feel better and he appreciated it. the two of you may never get to experience some of these things but at least you had each other's friendship.

"it sucks that we're both missing out on these things that practically everyone else has experienced. waiting for the right person is taking too long." you added on after a few moments. jungkook couldn't deny the way a small amount of jealousy flared up in his body at the thought of you finding someone to share your first kiss with. someone that wasn't him. and it seemed like he was too impulsive to keep that thought to himself.

"what better person to share your first kiss with than your best friend?" jungkook almost blurted out the sentence before he lost the sudden confidence. he had not only broken the silence between you two, but he felt as if he also broke the comfortable atmosphere. without looking down at you he could feel the way your body tensed through your thick layers of clothing.

"i mean- i'm just saying because like... we can't even find people who are comfortable with our friendship and nobody really wants to-" his jumbled up sentence was abruptly interrupted when he felt one of your mittens touch his cheek. it was if his whole body recoiled and his eyes darted down towards your face. your face was scarily calm and you were just staring at him. he was completely ready to play off what he said as a joke when you nodded.

"okay." you mumbled softly, and he swore that his heart had never started pounding so fast. due to his inexperience in romance, he had never really felt butterflies in his stomach... until now. he wanted to just take a handful of snow and shove it into his face to see if he was dreaming or actually experiencing this right now. but everything felt too real right now. he seemed to be noticing every miniscule detail right now.

the way your breath puffed softly into the air with every exhale, the soft blush that tinged your cheeks since you had just agreed to giving you first kiss to your best friend. the way that you eyes twinkled with the slight light from the city lights that were surrounding the both of you, and the snow that was still sprinkled lightly in your hair. but the most important detail that stood out to him was the way you were leaning closer to him. how those pretty lips looked like the softest thing. he found himself wondering how they tasted, and he'd be damned if he didn't find out.

and when your lips touched, all regrets simultaneously faded away.

all those years of feeling left out in life, the nights wishing that you would have someone to hold, someone to feel romance with. none of that mattered when you kissed each other. all of that was swept away, just like the breath from his lungs. he never knew that a moment like this would suddenly feel so intense, but he felt like right now he was being drowned and given life and nothing else mattered except for this kiss.

you weren't faring any better as well. the kiss was sweet. so much sweeter than you imagined. more so than the cookies you would bake together on a cold day, or the honey you would mix into your tea whenever you were sick. it's softer than the snow that surrounds the two of you in the current moment, impossibly softer than jungkook's voice whenever he's humming a tune to help you fall asleep at night.

the kiss tasted like the first shining rays of dawn, a start of something beautiful. it was a canvas upon which the sunrise of love would be painted. each touch was a brushstroke, creating a masterpiece of shared feelings written in the language of intertwined souls, feelings that had yet to be experienced until now. things that had been secretly brewing under the surface and shocked the both of you.

neither one in particular pulled away first, everything was too blurry to even remember it properly. both of you bombarded and overwhelmed with this emotions. the soft lights of the city around you which once illuminated your anticipation now exposed traces of vulnerability in both of your eyes - you couldn't help but wonder if jungkook had felt the same or if the symphony in your hearts was rather a solo performance on your side.

you had both unintentionally traveled into uncharted areas. words of everyone echoed through your mind right now, the countless times that you had been told that there was something more than just innocent friendship. jungkook could see the hesitation in your eyes, the instinct to retreat back into the safety of friendship the two of you had known for all these years. the promise to remain best friends for forever.

even the never-sleeping city of seoul and the intense snowstorm around you seemed to halt its movement, as if it was just waiting for something to be said. for a decision to be made, or for one of you to move back in again. waiting and waiting, and yet nothing ever came.

finally, a small, fragile smile spread onto jungkook's lips; an attempt to disregard the sudden tension in the moment surrounding you. it seemed to break you out of the trance you had been in, the world around you once resuming as you returned the smile back to him. as you gazed away from him and back towards the snow, the canvas filled with the starting of a masterpiece had been halted - waiting to be continued once again in the future.

your small canopy on the roof of your apartment was now a witness to what could've been, what might be. a shelf holding stories filled with chapters waiting to be filled and shared. but for now, it remained stagnant. this moment was held as nothing but that: a moment.

at least you could now join in the first kiss conversation with all of your friends.

end. ♥

best friends..? ❀ MASTERLIST

→ character pairing : best friend!Jungkook x fem!reader → series summary : a compilation of moments in which you find yourself questioning your relationship with your lifelong best friend.. wondering if it was simply friendship or instead so much more. → warnings : foul language, slight toxicity/jealousy (maybe), pretty much just fluff, will add warnings if needed → genre(s) : fluff, crack, angst (not sure about adding smut) → extra : THIS IS A DRABBLE SERIES!!! i recommend you read "new perfume" first for background info but the parts are all separate happenings unless it's stated that they're connected. this also means that there's no need to read in any specific order + are not numbered! → status : ongoing

CHAPTERS:

new perfume - fluff/crack ↳ in which you use a new perfume scent and jungkook is appalled. "you smell weird."

first kiss - fluff/crack/slight angst ↳ in which you two decide to share your first kiss together, because best friends do everything together... right..? "what better person to share your first kiss with than your best friend?"