Nsft D/s - Tumblr Posts
one day someone will love me enough to carve their initials into my back while i grip the bed or the table i’m flat on and scream and groan but i won’t even try to get away or push them off because i want it as much as they do. someone will love me enough to lick the wounds.
people on the outside looking in can be confused by my desire to be treated with utmost reverence and love and to be coddled while also being ruthlessly and relentlessly hurt. i don’t necessarily want to be humiliated or for pain to be a punishment. sometimes it’s about someone whispering sweet nothings in my ear while they make me scream, you know? sometimes i want someone to tell me they know i can take it and that they think i look so pretty like this and they’re going to push me a little more, just a little farther for them, even as i fight against the bindings. because they love me and they want to hurt me so, so bad. you know? 🙂
i guess i do like to be insulted but not in a gendered way or in a way that hinges on the sex i have. being called dirty or a slut just mildly annoys me because i don’t view it as insulting. i’m not dirty for liking sex and being a slut isn’t a bad thing.
but insults where someone just flexes their power over me? being called a dog, like i’m not even human? being called puppet, or cocksleeve? that is my fucking SHIT right there mmm mm.
Me vs the urge to grin like an idiot every time I get thuddily shoved into things. My back hits a wall with an oof and I’m already losing higher brain functions. PLEASE hit me around. Show me who’s boss. Give me a fight, I’ll make it easy, even.
Really into object insertion today. Imagining someone finding progressively bigger and bigger objects to stick inside their partner. Imagining them doing so with clinical efficiency, entirely fixated on how much can you take and how big can you go. Saying Just a little more, don’t move now. Shushing their partner when they whimper or try to move or squirm away from the huge wine bottle entering them. Or the sanded-smooth chair leg. Or the baseball bat. The sick fascination on their face as they watch it sink in, in, in into that once-tight hole. Leaving it stuck inside, groaning and starting to get themselves off right then and there at the sight of it, at the little noises and gasps their partner is making at being so utterly, utterly filled. So deep they can see the bulge in their stomach, can press one hand against it from the outside and revel in the aborted jerk it earns them. And then doing it again the next night, except with something even bigger. You know what I mean?
People have said it in more intelligent ways than I’m going to but the relationship between cis mlm and “straight guy gets turned gay” type of porn is in turns fascinating and relatable and repulsive. It carries over commonly to porn where the bottom is not conventionally queer-looking but instead is quite masculine in some way. It’s like. The internalized homophobia (which is really misogyny dressed up) that frames queer sex and bottoming as a form of degradation. And then that in turn is an outlet for men who imagine themselves as the tops in this scenario, where it becomes a defense against homosexuality on top of a defense against homosexuality. Because you as the top are “forcing” someone else in this scenario to take on the degrading role and this humiliating identity. And in that way removing yourself one step further because it is not JUST a fantasy of kinky degrading sex you’re having but of an act of aggression and violence against another man. I’m doing this to you, I’m making you into this.
Kink is a great way for people from all genders and orientations to explore their own internalized biases and taboos and that’s why I’m really into de transing and breeding and stuff so I’m definitely not knocking anybody who’s into it. I just find it genuinely fascinating to watch cis men show up in droves in the comments of posts that are just plain old “two guys fucking who don’t look conventionally queer” and inevitably always turning it into THIS GUY is STRAIGHT and he’s being FORCED to be GAY like the LITTLE PIG BITCH BOY HE IS.
Whereas it’s so refreshing and lovely to see masc men who don’t fit traditional twinky impressions of queerness joyfully and unselfconsciously participating in subbing and bottoming. I feel for them because their submission so often gets turned into an act of degradation by the very people they are creating this content for? Whether they want it to or not. And we could talk about the way this speaks to how so many mlm see even traditionally skinny femme bottoms and how that impacts THEM but that’s a topic for another day. Anyhow.