This Actually Happened - Tumblr Posts

POV:You got pinched so hard that you started humming EPIC:The Musical songs

Sometimes I'll just be going about my day when I suddenly remember that Cas dug a bullet out of his flesh and shoved it into his brothers eye

Beebo 1 and 2

Gf: can beebo 1 and 2 please sleep in the bed tonight?

Me: .....

Me: kjærelight, beebo 1 and 2 are plastic tanks

“half moon, in the morning sky

I guess the other half’s tucked away

in a blanket of blue

as our little nocturnal angel

cuddles up for a nap”

I look up from being engrossed in my inner monologue to see the moon has disappeared.

that moment when you have to pee but youre in bed comfortable and watching tiktoks.... and its been an hour since youve been holding it in cuz youre stubborn af

I'm ugly

Me: *see a mirror*

Me: *laughing at my own reflection*

Me: *spit on the mirror*

Me: you're disgusting

matt smith in hotd is unironically out here like, "actually my favourite prostitute that I'm cheating on my wife with and the lads down at the pub think I'd make a great king so fuck you"

BAHAH💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

jeongin: hyung, whats nostalgia?

felix: it’s when you miss something that’s really old

[ 20 minutes later ]

chan: i’m home!

hyunjin: welcome back, we missed you!

jeongin: *whispers* nostalgia

Brother: Teamwork makes the dream—

Mother: SHUT UP!

other people: my grandparents met in this super cute way

me: my grandparents met after grandma slapped a woman in church

All of the archive workers are blind. Tim is so contacts coded no one can tell me otherwise

someone just sent my dad five pounds of gummy bears and now I know what i will be randomly snacking on this summer

Me: *Switches to Alistair’s character*

Romanced!Alistair: At your service~ ;)

Me, flushed: Heal, mother fucker.

Basically canon

(Shut up, I don't want any arguments)

Uhh... I'm just gonna put it here..

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞

𝜗𝜚 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌𝐄: fluff, established relationship 𝜗𝜚 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: idol!hoshi x fem!reader 𝜗𝜚 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 565

⦗💌 ⦘ it's no secret that the kwon siblings love to tease each other. but what happens when you come into play?

“stop touching my food!” soonyoung whined, as his sister quickly stole another piece of meat from his plate, giggling quietly. that had to be the third time she did that in the last five minutes, and hoshi was having none of that. “told you you shouldn’t have ordered that salad,” he muttered, looking at the last pieces of his favourite food on the nearly empty plate. 

“children, could you stop fighting for once and let us eat in peace?” his father chimed in. “we can’t take you out anywhere.” 

you, on the other hand, were too focused on your own food to notice the bickering that was happening right next to you. your day had been long and tiring, and this had to be your first meal of the day, so no one was really surprised that you were kind of in your own world at the moment. besides, at this point you were so used to the kwon siblings teasing each other that you stopped paying much attention to it. 

“it’s not my fault he’s being a chil- hey! why does she get to steal your food?” soonyoung’s sister asked indignantly, pointing her finger at you. “why are you not yelling at her, huh?” 

you quickly stopped in your tracks with your fork between yours and hoshi's plate with the last piece of his meat on it, and you could feel everyone's eyes on you without having to look up. “huh? what’s going on?” you asked, confused. sharing food in your relationship was normal, to be honest - you never fully ate whatever you ordered, you always shared it between each other, so why did you feel like you just committed a crime? 

“maybe because she’s my girlfriend, you moron,” soonyoung snickered, and moved his arm from the back of your chair to lay his hand on your thigh. “eat up, baby. don’t worry about her,” he said, and pecked your temple. 

his sister laughed bitterly, and set her fork down, clearly annoyed. “don’t worry about her? remember who’s the oldest here, kwon soonyoung.” 

your eyes wandered between the two with amusement, as you munched on the meat you just stole from soonyoung. it must have looked really funny from the perspective of the people sitting at the nearby tables - two adults shouting insults at each other like five-year-olds, but for you (less for their parents) this  was pure entertainment. 

your boyfriend and his sister were the epitome of a brother- sister dynamic. 

“oh my god, why are you so surprised i’m letting my literal girlfriend have my food?” he probably didn’t notice how his grip on you slightly tightened on the word “girlfriend”, but you couldn’t hide the small smile as he did that. it was cute how his body was unconsciously paying attention to you without him even knowing. “stop being a pain in the ass, and keep eating that grass or whatever that is.” 

“did you just rhyme ass with gra-?” 

“okay, you know what? you,” soonyoung’s mom pointed her fork at her daughter, “stop stealing his food. and you,” now she turned her head to her son, “have nothing left on that plate so leave, or keep your mouth zipped.” 

“but mom, it wasn’t me who started this!” 

yeah, the kwon family was a funny bunch, and you thanked your luckiest stars you could be a part of this beautiful mess.

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Chuckles: Pull the glove dandy

Dandy: *pulls the out reached gag hand*

Chuckles: WRONG GLOVEeeee

I... don't really understand why people acted so overdramatic over VLD's ending.

I mean in terms of crying over fan art of characters that died because they were depicted as alive in the art piece.

Uh...

Please touch grass.

me:*makes a little Azazel figure as TBOI merch* heh cool

REAL Azazel: it’s free real estate

me:...huh, okay

and this is how me and Azazel started living together

story time!

I bring my shrines with me when I go to visit my aunt in the countryside, her husband had passed away afew years back and still haunts the place, (just sitting in his office and waling around, he don't do much)

my shrines are for: Thoth, Set, and Stolas

so I do a ritual for Stolas and he stays in the house for a little while and my uncle started to yell at me afterwords about it

"you let a demon in my house!"

and I said "it would've been fie if you didn't try to smack him!" and called him a r@cist (he was) and smacked the old man and apologised to the owl prince.(he was understanding about it)

Okay so I had this vivid dream…

David Duchovny was explaining in a behind-the-scenes video that there was this thing in season 1 called The Scully Bomb where as a last resort, Mulder would throw Scully at a suspect and quote, “hope for the best.” Fox made them cut all scenes where this happened though, and then Gillian Anderson cut in saying, “If you see any scenes where my hair is out of place for no reason, that’d be because of David throwing me.”

I want to believe this actually happened