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1 year ago

A Story That Has No Name

After Ianto died, Jack started seeing his ghost.

He could see him, he could talk to him, except that, it wasn’t the real him.

It wasn't even Ianto's ghost, or at least not his real ghost. He had no thoughts. He had no feelings. he was not real. Any emotions he felt came from Jack, and he would be there as long as Jack remembered him.

At first, Jack didn't realize that it wasn't the real Ianto, or even if he did, he did not want to admit it. He let himself drown in his memories, away from reality, away from the world, away from everything.

And all this time, Ianto was with him.

Later he went to the House of the Dead. Of course he would. He wouldn't miss any chance to see Ianto again. Even though he knew that, the person he met might not be the real Ianto.

But Ianto saved the world again. He saved Jack again. So Jack told him that he loved him and that he longed to see him, and then he said goodbye to Ianto for the last time.

He left the House of the Dead. And when he walked out of the door of that shabby bar, he found that the phantom of Ianto he had always seen was still by his side.

Seven months after the House of the Dead, Jack learned how to make coffee. From his view, it was the phantom Ianto teaching him hand by hand. But Ianto Jones was not really here, and Jack Harkness was always alone. The so-called Ianto teaching him how to make coffee was actually him remembering how Ianto did it - in the early morning in his apartment, after Jack occasionally spent the night there with him. He remembered how the morning sun shone on Ianto's fingertips and how the steam from the coffee pot filled Ianto's eyes.

So Jack couldn’t help but smiled, and Ianto - the Ianto he knew was not Ianto - smiled back at him.

When he turned around, the sun shone gently into his eyes.

A year after CoE, Jack's coat was accidentally scratched a little. He had scratched his coat before, but Ianto would always fix it for him. But this time, he wouldn't do it again. He couldn’t do it never again.

Jack looked at his coat and realized that it was bought by Ianto on the first day of Children of Earth, the last gift Ianto gave him. He folded it and put it on his lap. He was crying to a coat.

He felt that another part of Ianto had left him.

Three years after CoE, when the Miracle Day had ended, Jack left the Earth again. One day, the phantom Ianto asked him, saying that he hadn't seen Jack wearing that coat for a long time. He gave Ianto a grin and joked that he just didn't want to damage it because he could never learn how to fix it properly. And Ianto shrugged saying that he could always teach him.

The way he shrugged really looked like the real Ianto, Jack thought. But this was Ianto. This was the Ianto in his memory.

Ten years after CoE, he asked Yvonne from the parallel universe that if there was a person named Ianto Jones in her life. But this Yvonne didn't know Ianto Jones, and the Yvonne who knew Ianto Jones had died in Canary Wharf, more than a decade ago.

The phantom Ianto was beside him, trying to hold his hand. But his fingertips went through, and fell into the hollow air.

Fifty years after CoE, Jack began to forget Ianto's voice - One day when he habitually talked to Ianto about Gwen, he found that Ianto didn't speak. He asked Ianto why he didn't speak. Ianto shook his head and smiled sadly at him.

Then he suddenly realized that he didn't remember Ianto's voice.

Two hundred years after CoE, the face of the phantom Ianto faded away, as if it was covered by a veil. Jack couldn't see him clearly, but he knew that Ianto was still there.

He knew that this was because he started to forget what Ianto looked like. But fortunately, he still had Ianto's photos, which could help him remember.

But photos also grows old, so another two hundred years passed, Jack finally forgot Ianto’s eyes.

One thousand years after CoE, he began to have new lovers. He loved each of them, but he was always losing them. Everyone around him was dying, and he couldn't save them from death. He couldn't save anyone from death.

But, still, when he was with his lover, he knew that the phantom Ianto was watching him. He didn't blame Jack, Jack knew. He knew that Ianto wanted to tell him that he was happy that Jack could go on, could love someone else, and could have a new life.

But Jack didn't go on.

Jack was sad. Jack was really sad.

Two thousand years after CoE, the phantom Ianto was almost obscured, like a worn-out photo, no matter how hard Jack tried, he couldn't keep Ianto clear. So he knew, he began to forget the way Ianto dressed.

What did he like to wear? What did he like to eat? How would his eyebrows frown when he was annoyed? Not to mention his dry wit and sarcastic humor.

Jack didn't remember.

Human memory is a strange thing. He forgot a lot of things, he forgot too many things. But he couldn't forget the name of Ianto Jones.

Ten thousand years after CoE, the phantom Ianto appeared less frequently in front of him. But he would occasionally come to accompany Jack for a while, like when Jack didn't go to the bar or be with anyone on a certain night. When he was alone, in the moonlight, Ianto Jones would come back to him.

It was at this time that Jack Harkness realized that he rarely look back upon Ianto’s name.

Five billion years after CoE, the Earth began to burn. At this time, Jack Harkness was no longer Jack Harkness, and Ianto Jones was long buried in his mind. But when he watched the Earth begin to collapse, collapse in front of him, he suddenly saw that figure again.

He saw a handsome young man, a handsome young man wearing a striped suit and a violet tie.

The Face of Boe closed his eyes, and a name appeared. He couldn’t help to utter that name, the name that had survived billion years in his mind --

How are you gonna remember him

Even long after he's gone.

notes:

Okay I finally finished this translation of my own work as I promised three years ago.. It was originally posted in 2021 in Mandarin and for some reason (or we should say my laziness) I didn't translated it until now, with some minor changes of course.

The original work in Mandarin is here if anyone is interested :3

As always, pls forgive my English and any suggestions are welcomed!


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