Remember In Deathly Hallows When Narcissa And Lucius Said Fuck This War And Ditched Voldemort Because

remember in deathly hallows when narcissa and lucius said fuck this war and ditched voldemort because their son was in danger? i mean yes, narcissa and lucius respected all those blood-purity stuff and were overall bad but they were also,,,really caring

i mean when voldemort gave draco the task she literally cried and begged snape to protect him

and lucius was trying to persuade voldemort to let him find his son during the battle

i kinda respect them for that

Shit Slytherins Say

Nottgrass, Dransy

Non-magical, college, texting AU

For my wife @daphnegreengrass

ao3

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: What in the name of merlin did I do last night

Astoria to fuck bitches get money: Honey what didn’t u do

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: Someone pls enlighten me, all my shoes r in the shoer

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: *shower

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: I need to wash my hair but

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: I cannot move them

Daphne to fuck bitches get money: lmaoo u pushed draco into the pond

Daphne to fuck bitches get money: Hes super pissed at u

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: Whoops lmao is that why I facetimed him at 5am

Pansy to fuck bitches get money: Lil bitch didn’t answer

Millie to fuck bitches get money: He texted me at 7 that he found a small fish in his ear

Millie to fuck bitches get money: I’m p sure he was lying

Millie to fuck bitches get money: But the point stands that he is very mad at u

Keep reading

sometimes im happy and then i remember that nymphadora tonks is dead

then i remember that ted tonks is dead too

then i remember that andromeda lost the love of her life and her only child

andromeda tonks is so underrated

she gave up her whole life and left the most prestigious household to marry a muggleborn that she loved so much

she didnt care about pureblood rules anymore

she made her own choice

she had a happy life

but then the only left evidence of her family was her grandson teddy

andromeda is such a strong woman

harry potter books as clickbait titles except that it's actually true

philosophers stone: 'I'M A WIHAT? STORYTIME: Got sent to a WIZARD SCHOOL and KILLED a teacher!'

chamber of secrets: 'THE HEIR OF WHAT? STORYTIME: My best friend got petrified so I went down a toilet to kill a SNAKE and a HANDSOME BOY?'

prisoner of azkaban: 'HE WAS THEIR FRIEND! STORYTIME: My teacher is a WEREWOLF?? A murderer that escaped from prison claims to be my GODFATHER!'

goblet of fire: 'I DIDN'T PUT MY NAME IN THAT CUP OK? STORYTIME: Got put in a DEADLY TOURNAMENT! (BI AWAKENING) VOLDEMORT IS BACK AND HE KILLED MY CRUSH! (EMOTIONAL)'

order of the phoenix: 'NEW PRINCIPLE? STORYTIME: Dumbledore wouldn't talk to me! NEW PRINCIPLE MADE A LOCKDOWN?? My GODFATHER is DEAD! (EMOTIONAL)'

half blood prince: 'I TOLD YOU HE'S A DEATH EATER MIONE! STORYTIME: Draco Malfoy was CRYING IN THE BATHROOM so I almost KILLED HIM! HORCRUX HUNTING WITH DUMBLEDORE(HE DIED!!!)'

deathly hallows (pt.1 cuz its too long): 'DROPPED OUT OF SCHOOL! STORYTIME: Searching for horcruxes! I stole DRACO MALFOY'S WAND?? IT WORKS PERFECT WTF! Dobby is DEAD! (EMOTIONAL)'

deathly hallows (pt.2): 'BROKE INTO A BANK! STORYTIME: Freed a BLIND DRAGON and sneaked into HOGWARTS! (STARTED A WAR) Saved MALFOY from the FIENDFYRE! EVERYONE STOP FUCKING DYING! (Snape is ACTUALLY GOOD) KILLED TOM WITH AN 'EXPELLIARMUS'! (VERY EMOTIONAL)

cursed child: 'MIONE WHY DIDN'T YOU DESTROY THAT DAMN TIME TURNER! STORYTIME: Voldemort has a DAUGHTER? DRACO'S child and MY CHILD are BEST FRIENDS??? They travel in TIME! Almost died (AGAIN)'

pansy: uh oh! the printer messed up the invitation! it was supposed to say 'draco's birthday'!

harry: what does it say?

theo: draco's gay

draco: how does one miswrite that?

ron and hermione: it's the truth

slytherin culture is knowing the lyrics to every britney spears song