Alot - Tumblr Posts
Interview with a Douchebag
So driving down the street today, I come upon a traffic light. At this particular intersection my lane turns right, and the lane next to me going the same direction turns left. I stop as it is a red light, and begin to make my turn, only to have the Lexus in the lane next to me, come flying around me and cut me off in the middle of the intersection before driving off.
Irritated I continued driving, and upon coming up to the next light, am directly behind the Lexus again. The light turns green, and he continues to sit there unaware; I can only assume playing on his phone. I honk at him, and he speeds off, going 60 down a 40 MPH street.
As I’m continuing my way, watching this asshole of a driver cut and weave through traffic, a Chevy truck suddenly swerves in front of me, slams on his brakes, and speeds off down the road.
At this point I’m ready to fight.
I floor it, following both vehicles, when they slow down and both turn down the same dead end street. Curious I follow them.
I slowly pass the house they pulled into, a sizable two-story, and watch them slowly get out of their respective vehicles, eyeing me up and down. I can tell they are both college boys, living their white privileged lives, and giving zero fucks about anyone else in the universe.
I continue down the street, turn around and begin heading home, uninterested in wasting my time on these pricks, when the white truck comes backing out of the driveway, turning straight towards me. Right before he hits me, I honk on the horn to let him know that I am in fact there, because Lord knows he didn’t look. He glances in the rearview, sees me, and then continues to keep coming right at me, before shiting into drive and driving away again.
Two boys are in the yard staring. I’m irritated beyond hell, but not so much as my roommate who is in the front seat. He rolls down his window, and this beautiful conversation ensues:
Roommate: “Just how many fucking douchebags live here?!”
Douchebag: “What do you mean?!”
Roommate: “What I mean, is that YOU cut us off in traffic, HE cut us off in traffic, and now HE almost backed into us! So how many douchebags fucking live here?!!”
Douchebag: “Ah… A LOT!!!”
Roommate: “…. WELL EVIDENTLY, DUMBASS!!!”
I drove away laughing my ass off.
Huitzilopochtli bingo :0?
Yesssss
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