Brucie Wayne - Tumblr Posts

Ok but Brucie Wayne wearing this saying he’s a slut for Batman?

Thinking about the idea of the justice league reading gossip articles about Bruce after they find out he’s Batman and I’m losing it.

“Bruce Wayne makes a splash Friday night, drunkenly takes swim in fountain”

“Bruce Wayne third rendezvous this week??”

“Another messy night escapade for Bruce Wayne”

“Tipsy Bruce Wayne takes spill into cake, wears it well”

This is the guy that redefined fear?

It gets even better thinking about after Bruce starts adopting, cause now that entire family is in the headlines. Somehow the league has to align the mental image of the Wayne’s with the Batfamily.

“Dick Grayson, eldest Wayne boy, sails through air on chandelier at charity benefit” this guy filled in as Batman on numerous occasions

“Jason Todd caught leaving ‘kick me’ sticky notes on a drunken Bruce Wayne’s back at Saturday’s Wayne gala” like, that’s the red hood??

“Bruce Wayne’s boy Tim Drake asleep in salad next to partying billionaire” the dude who hacked the watch tower last Tuesday?

“Youngest Wayne, Damian, and sister Cass seen mimicking stumbling father as loyal butler intervenes” …The league are still terrified of these two

Like, how are they supposed to wrap their heads around the fact that these guys are somehow the scourges of the underworld who haunt Gotham.

"anyone can be a babygirl but it takes a man to be a single mother"

uhhh. bruce wayne modelling gig. have a good day 🥰

Bruce Wayne on the sharks

- full on Brucie mode

- cries when he finds out the show doesn’t feature actual sharks, that revelation does not happen on episode 1

- backs up companies based on their logos, names, and how nice the people are but somehow always makes good business decisions

- some dude gives an impressive presentation but fails to calculate the tax rate on imported steel or some shit, and Bruce is the only shark who notices, he ends up not backing the company due to “bad vibes”

- it drives Lex Luthor mad

- Bruce: I like sharks, they’re so nice and smooth

Lex: *enraged screeching*

- Bruce Wayne, to his kids as he dresses up for his next “Brucie Wayne” appearance where he plans to make several scenes, sing Britney Spears’ Toxic on the karaoke machine, and spill red wine all over Lex Luthor’s new suit

ok ok ok I am all for the “people suspect Batman and Bruce Wayne are dating” identity shenanigans. I am all for the “Batman and Bruce Wayne seem to hate each other” identity shenanigans. And I am all aboard the “WE funds Batman because they are notorious frenemies with a common goal and a VERY similar insanity” identity shenanigans. All of these for both fanon and canon. But if I may propose an extra option that I harbor in my head? Would you all kindly humor me if I were to say…

Batman, grumbling after being questioned about his relationship to Bruce Wayne by the Justice League: Pearly is like… an annoying little brother. Who you want to push down the stairs…and watch his head crack open. ….But if anyone else hurt him, I’d throw them into deep space. 

Bruce Wayne, with no small bitterness, while being abducted by a rogue and questioned on his relationship to Batman: The Batman? He’s like an overprotective older brother who sticks his nose into all of my business and always has something to say about it but is evidently never around when I actually need him.

Bruce Wayne’s official Twitter tweets out “Bitch!” with no context. An egg profile labeled notbatman23894984 responds, “Whore.”

get his ass

Bruce Wayne Week: Day 2: Identity

Rated: G

Author chooses not to use content warnings

Tim sometimes wished Bruce was more like Brucie at home. Fun, care-free, etc. But alas, he supposes he should just enjoy the Brucie moments at the office- like right now.

Bruce cleared his throat and stood up, face morphing into a bright and airy smile. He grabbed the projector clicker and type something into his computer. They had been brainstorming how they could find the elusive Batman, hoping he'd agree to let them fund him, besides having Gotham's protector's support would look good on paper.

"Thank you all for coming to this meeting," bruce started, "now to start this off I'll give my presentation first..." The man clicked a button and Tim almost choked at the title, wondering where this would all lead.

'Who I, Bruce Wayne, Think Batman Is: A List."

"Right, okay, first off we have Lex Luthor. Firstly he's rich and I've never seen batman and him in the same room together. Second, I know he's a villain but, that's kind of the perfect disguise. Third, he's bald...so helmet hair isn't a problem for him-"

Tim was going red in the face, trying hard to keep his laughter quiet.

@brucewayneweek

I'm gonna redraw one (or a couple) piece(s) that I've done, so if u want,,,, tell me which ones u want to see re-done

The Feminine urge to write both

Forget keeping up with the kardashians but for the Waynes

I want keeping up with the freakin Al Ghuls

So.... I fulfilled one part of the urge...

Forget keeping up with the kardashians but for the Waynes

I want keeping up with the freakin Al Ghuls

Damian walks up for the first time in his brand new school , his teacher by his side, he watches the other children playing. They run after each other and grab shoulders and arms.

"ADOPTED !" Yells one boy.

Quite suprise, Damian asks:

"What are they playing ?"

The teacher cringes hard but finds no good way to say it.

"Ehm....Bruce Wayne and the orphans...?"

Batman: Vigilante; Hero; Dark Knight; Protector of Gotham City; A Legend; A Cryptid by all rights

Brucie Wayne: Playboy; Ditz; Generous and Greedy all at once; Rules by his Emotions; An Easy Victim; A front; A mask; What the World Sees because no one would ever believe the conspiracy of Brucie Wayne being Batman

Bruce Wayne: The Man Behind the Mask; Calculating; A Scientist; An Idealist

B: A Father

Bruce figured out their civilian identities pretty quickly. He had to, in order to recruit them. Either way, he knew the names of all of the Justice League heroes and they had no idea who he was.

Most of them either ignored their personas - like Wonder Woman and Green Lantern who didn't talk about their civilian life in costume or vice versa - while others - Superman - sang their own praises as civilians.

Superman's whole having three names thing was useful, and a pretty good cover, but Batman had spotted that the relationship between Clark Kent and Lois Lane was the exact one that Superman and Lois Lane shared, so that was a bit of a moot point.

Personally, Bruce liked his way of keeping people off his tail. Not only were Brucie Wayne and Batman polar opposites, but they were both each other's biggest haters. Although, Bruce publicly admitted that he thinks Batman has the right idea, just not the best execution. While Batman, not on record but definitely heard, has said that Bruce Wayne does good things for Gotham as a whole.

The kids all think it's hilarious, but no one - except Tim, but he's a special case - has managed to cement his civilian and caped identities as being the same person.

Well, maybe Harvey has, but that's because of a lot of reasons. As long as Two Face doesn't reveal that information, and Bruce knows he won't, then all's well.

The point is that Batman knows who the Justice League are outside of capes and masks, but they don't know who he is. Of course, revealing himself would mean revealing his kids, and they wouldn't like that if he was boring about it.

The only natural solution is to be over the top and dramatic about it.

He could keep his name to himself, but where's the fun in that?

Though, it'd be funnier if he managed to keep the appearance of Batman and Bruce Wayne hating each other, especially if he reveals that the Bat Cave is under Wayne Manor.

That'd be funny. His kids would be proud.

His kids will want in on this.

He's got some conspiring planning to do.

Storyboard Part 2

I really don't know why, but the amount of serotonin I get when I see the batkids being hey! that's my dad towards Bruce is off the charts

As Bruce grows older into his 50's or 60's the paparazzi and people crowding him becomes less and he thinks that people have finally decided that Bruce is too old to be attractive or mainstream and he's actually super fine with it and makes jokes( more like sarcastic remarks) about it. But in reality they've grown more freaky cause instead of looking wrinkly and a sappy old man the level of cunt he serves grows everyday,he doesn't look like a snack he looks like a buffet, 13 year olds are using his pics as the cover pages of their mafia wattpad stories, he looks majestic, absolute dilf, we don't talk about the amount of tags he's birthed just by ageing on ao3, and hes still an absolute UNIT, the reason he's not heard about it yet cause the batkids are blocking the shit OUT with all of their will and strength cause it doesn't matter if all of them are full grown adults they're still all like-THATSMYDADGETAWAYFROMHIMHEDOESN'THAVETIMEFORYOUHESBUSYBEINGOURDAD

AU where the Justice League haven’t revealed their secret IDs to each other yet (or at least Batman hasn’t) and the League, after several coincidental run-ins with him, know that Bruce Wayne is much more intelligent and calculating than he acts in the media. Except they don’t know why—they just think he acts that way because he hates working and wants to get out of dealing with responsibilities or smth

Clark Kent the reporter happens to be attending a gala Bruce is holding when it gets attacked by some rogue or other, and all the guests are being held hostage in the room, and there’s a bomb and everything, it’s all very dramatic and Gotham-typical. Clark and Bruce are hiding behind a table, coincidentally where the bomb is, timer slowly counting down. Clark can’t become Superman without blatantly blowing his secret ID, and Batman’s not showing up for some reason, so he (preparing to just fuckin jump on the bomb and tank that shit, consequences be damned) kinda frantically as a last resort asks if Bruce knows how to disarm a bomb and Bruce (who knows that Clark is Superman and is kinda messing with him) just pulls out a whole belt of tools like “As a matter of fact, Mr Kent, I took a course on bomb disposal back on my self-discovery journey!”

“A what now.”

“A self-discovery journey, Mr Kent, I’d be happy to tell you all about it after this.”

“No, I meant—you took a course on what.”

I want so bad for Bruce to have been on Shark Tank in the dc universe, but Brucie Wayne isn't business enough. You know who is? And who I would love infinitely more to be on Shark Tank? Timothy Drake.

I want more Brucie Wayne Content. I can’t get enough of the man embarrassing the shit out of himself. It’s addicting.

But I also want to see Brucie breaking character when he’s in a room with a reporter.

I want to see Bruce literally dumping himself on a love seat and Jason just passes him an unlit cigarette (ehem), which Tim (yes, Tim) lights up with his random ass lighter. Then I want to read the reporter slowly losing their goddamn minds. Because,

“This can’t be Brucie Wayne! He’s the Prince of Gotham!”

“Aren’t they suppose to be the happy, pleasant family that donates money that seems to never end?”

To which I want Bruce to respond with,

“I am the Prince of Gotham. But remember, Joker is the Clown Prince of crime in Gotham. If he’s Crime, then I have to be the Prince of something too, don’t I?”

Then his kids all surrounding him are just snickering to each other.