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𐙚 the poets department.

— or in which i associate certain ttpd songs with (some) honkai star rail men.

— warnings: angst if you squint

— author's notes: notice how jing yuan is the only one who had a happy part? banner credits to @cafekitsune please check them out they make very pretty banners <3

𐙚  BLADE    ;    THE PROPHECY

blade has never known peace ever since his betrayal with an old friend. 

he yearns and yearns for his time to finally come. howling like a crazed wolf at the moon whenever the mara trapped in his body strikes and every time he’d gaze longingly, wishing to be taken back to time where he and his old friends would sit under the moon drinking their sorrows away. blade didn’t care if the graying hairs on his head spoke of his eventual departure; so long as his friends would remember him fondly then he’d die in peace with no complaints.

but now, every waking hour, he waits for destiny’s slave to write down his death on his script.

he was a monster, cursed to eternal loneliness,  and yet that didn’t stop you from treating him with kindness. little old you who frets over him like a nagging but loving mother. greeting him with a smile that made feelings he buried deep within his chest start to resurface.

maybe this was the “death” he’s been hoping for; blade would die from all the yearning he has for you.

all the times you would keep him company after tiring missions did his cracking heart no good. the urge to throw himself into danger just so you could patch him up; yearning for the arms that reminded him of a home that’s long gone. how he wouldn’t be ashamed to stare at you or your hands, wanting to hold them in his own calloused ones. he doesn’t shrug off the thoughts of you from his mind but he’d cut off his own arm before they could ever reach you.

in blade’s mind, you were too good for him. something he’ll come to destroy one day and he didn’t even dare to imagine how that would affect him. now, instead of waiting for destiny’s slave to write out his death, he hopes that he finds a few more reasons to stay longer, for your sake.

𐙚  DAN FENG   ;    IMGONNAGETYOUBACK

what petty rivalry you and the high elder had. always trying your best to one-up him at anything and everything but ultimately failing while dan feng laughed in amusement in your seething bitterness. but the high elder couldn’t deny the feelings of endearment whenever you show up with jing yuan and others to drink, or how you show him the new weapon yingxing had crafted for you. challenging him to another sparring session while the others watched in the sidelines with amusement.

oh how you wanted to wrap your hands around his neck when you caught wind of his plans to try and resurrect his fallen comrade, making yingxing his accomplice in the process.

the way his eyes started to crack with panic as you pulled your bowstring back and aimed an arrow straight to his heart. but dan feng knew, you knew as well, that you wouldn’t actually let the arrow go and kill him even if you say otherwise. in the end, you lowered your weapon as the high elder was escorted to the shackling prison.

before he was forced to be reborn into a new reincarnation, you visited him and how you wished to punch that knowing smile off his face. you exchange brief pleasantries before you ultimately get fed up with his nonsense. all the while you ignore the shouts of his promise in his next life.

sneak him out of the prison, run away somewhere far from the luofu or to turn your back on your first love, it didn’t matter. both choices were poison either way.

𐙚  DAN HENG   ;    PETER

how many years have passed since you thought of him? better yet, why do you still think of him? why do you feel a wave of ambivalent emotions when you see his new incarnation?

 when your eyes met for a brief moment, you had turned away quickly. muttering a soft apology to the merchant you were speaking to a moment ago as you sped walked your way back home. oh how you wish your feelings for the previous high elder would die just like him.

how you hate the way your heart replayed the days spent with him under the sun as he argued that he’d recognize you in every lifetime; the ocean deep promises to find you in every life. you wonder if he remembers you now.

by the time the sun had risen again, he was right there. just a few feet away from you while you carry documents for the master diviner. you hated the way your feet refused to move as he strides towards you, a smile you remember all too well on his face as he offered you a hairpin.

“i remembered, like i promised.”

oh how pitiful was it of you as you dropped the papers in your arms to wrap them around his neck, pulling him a tight embrace. you didn't want to admit that you had been waiting for his return, but truly, love is never lost when perspective is earned.

𐙚  JING YUAN   ;    THE ALCHEMY

it was quite a sight to behold really. the great apprentice of the luofu’s sword champion, on the ground with you pointing a wooden sword at his throat with a victorious smile.

you reveled in the compliments your peers gave you but eventually grew tired of how jing yuan would annoy to no end. you were this close to asking his master to cut him from the training sessions. but you don’t deny the way your cheeks flush after every sparring session jing yuan would win, he’d come running to you, asking if you were watching.

you’d hope that when he grew older he’d at least grow a mature bone in his body, oh how wrong you were. how was it possible that the same kid you’d beaten to a pulp would grow to be taller than you and even more annoying. 

his relentless teasing when you couldn’t land as much hits as you did when the two of you were just kids nearly sent you spiraling over the edge. poor yingxing had to listen to your rants for hours on end, sometimes even kicking you out of his workshop so he could actually get some work done.

but despite all of his annoyingness and your wishes for him to mature, you will never grow tired of him running straight towards you after every victory he’s won under his belt. jing yuan has made it known to everyone that your name was etched into his heart, and really, who were you to fight the alchemy?

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

— love is (ir)rational. ft. veritas ratio

— warnings: angst and breakups

— author's note: incredibly self-indulgent and heavily influenced by tiktoks and mitski songs. the last statement is from this article so please give it a read since its very interesting !!

to say that your relationship with veritas ratio was hanging by a thread was an understatement.

you tried your hardest to sweep every argument at night when you enter his office under the rug and prayed to the aeons that he'd forget it when morning came; you never learned how to deal with confrontation, so you did what you do best: avoid the situation entirely at all cost.

playing as the fool who couldn't see the cracks in your already fragile situation with ratio but still clinged onto the tiniest of hopes that everything will be fixed. that no argument between you two would actually leave you to split paths. you always found a way to one another, a middle ground you had unspokenly created. you always made it work. you had to make it work.

“this is not going to work, [name]!” he shouts as you fight back tears.

“you don't know that! we always make it work don't we, veritas? you can't just decide stuff like this on your own!” you argue with him the best you could, but veritas ratio was a genius. 

you will never win an argument against him.

“this is hurting us. you.” he sighs as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “we can't continue like this, and you know it.”

“then continue to hurt me.” you desperately try to claw into your lover's mind. trying to keep any piece of him because it was better to not have anything at all. “i don't care if it hurts, veritas! if it's you then it's fine, i can look past it.”

you look like a scared animal, desperate for love and the need to feel something, even if it was pain.

“we'll be fine, veritas.” you clutch onto your shirt as tears pricked your eyes. “we have to! you promised me!”

ratio was a logical man. he was a genius. someone who should've been acknowledged by nous themselves. but at this very moment, he realizes that no amount of academic knowledge will compare to the flurry of the unknown emotional wreckage that is you. someone who thinks too much of love. bewitched with the prospect of love instead of their actual partner - him.

“veritas, please… we can still make this work.”

the diplomas of his achievements were a farce; a big hoax to hide the hollowness that resides within where his heart should be.

“you and i both know that we were both too far gone to save.”

ratio closes his eyes. trying his best to rid the hurt and shrinking image of you from his mind. 

“you don't know how to love yourself.” you avoided the truth to protect yourself, he traversed the universe to make the truth known. “how can you expect me to give you the love you want when you don't even know what it is?”

what an ugly pair you two make.

“that's bullshit!” you were gasping for air. scavenging your mind to try and find a way to refute him like you always do. “i want you, veritas! do you not understand that?”

“no.” he answered with a shake of his head. “no, i do not, [name].”

you feel your already broken heart crack a little more.

“that stuff is all bullshit.” your whisper now was just above whisper. “so what if what you said is true? you loved me at least didn't you?”

veritas didn't like the way you looked at him. so full of loneliness and fear. that look didn't suit you, not in the slightest.

“that's all i needed, veritas. you loved me so much i forgot what it felt like to hate myself.”

to love means to surrender intellectual control; veritas ratio cannot rationalize love even if you told him otherwise. but there was one thing you didn't tell him - one thing you refused to tell veritas ratio.

‘if your partner has inherently good qualities, but your love for them is based on a projection of your fantasy onto them, your love does not fit the qualities of the beloved that fueled your love. your love fails to be epistemically justified.’

— [name], ????. the emotion that is love.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

𐙚 wipe your tears.

— or in which you receive some comfort when you cry.

— warnings: angst if you squint

— author's notes: self-indulgent, once again credits to @.cafekitsune for the banners.

𐙚  AVENTURINE 

aventurine is familiar with tears. he knows the stinging feeling at the corner of your eyes as you roughly wipe them away. aventurine might not want to admit it, but he's a sensitive man at heart; just the sight of you desperately trying to shy away from him rekindled that vulnerable piece of him he's tucked under his refined mask.

it's a fruitless attempt because with just one gentle touch of his fingertips on your cheek shattered all the walls you've been building up over the years.

the way his arms came to envelop you in a warm hug, his shoulder slowly dampening with your tears, it truly broke his heart to see you in such a state.

aventurine’s gambler like persona crumbles away as he whispers soft comforts in your ears while his hand rubs continuous circles on his back. shushing your cries but never once trying to dismiss the feelings that wrack your body.

aventurine never had a shoulder to cry on after he escaped his cruel fate, he understands what it feels like to bottle up every and any emotion that shakes his very being. he doesn't want you to turn out that way, so he’ll be the shoulder you can cry on.

𐙚  VERTIAS RATIO

dr. ratio isn't the brightest when it comes to tears. the way his brows knit together and the way he bites his lip in frustration when his hands ghost over your curled body.

but despite his inexperience in comforting, he wrapped his steady arms around your body, grounding you; reminding you that he's here by your side.

dr. ratio doesn't whisper soft nothing's into your ears — he isn't sure what to say to lift your spirits. he just stays quiet and hopes that it'll suffice.

and it does. despite what many would believe, veritas ratio is kind. kinder than anyone could ever imagine. 

no one will ever come to understand him the way you do, that's why in this very moment, with your most vulnerable self, veritas ratio repays your patience and commitment to him with quiet solace as you continue to cry on his chest. free from all the judgment the world has given you.

𐙚  WELT YANG

compared to anyone else, welt has seen more tears than he'd like to admit. tears from himself, the people that took him in, and the girl he'd trained under his wings until she herself could fly on her own. welt never fails to offer a comforting shoulder to those who cry, and you are no exception.

you try to curl yourself away from him, arms tightly gripping the sides of your legs as you refuse to raise your head. welt kneels in front of you as he strokes your head, voice soft and just above whisper. careful to not upset you further.

he doesn't question you on why you're crying, he's just that understanding. you often wonder what you did to deserve such a person in your life. 

he doesn't urge you to get up, instead he sits beside you quietly. keeping you in his silent company. you don't know how long the two of you stayed like that, but it wasn't long when welt felt a weight land on his shoulder and instinctively, he wrapped his arm around you. smiling softly as he asks if you're okay now.

𐙚  ARGENTI

the room was cold and you felt very, very lonely without your lover by your side. you knew of the consequences of taking a knight of beauty as a lover, he is always on the move to spread the word of his aeon. he himself has warned you about this but you shrugged your shoulders and told him you'll be fine.

however, tonight, as you let the winds caress your cheek at your front porch, you wish for nothing but argenti’s embrace to distract your mind from your insecurities.

“what's the matter, my love?” an armored hand came to wipe away the stray tears that escaped your eyes. the way your vision blurred as you threw yourself in his arms was brief, it didn't take long for argenti to wrap his arms around your waist and bury his head in your hair.

the knight alternated with whispering apologies and reassurances in your ear as you both stood on your porch. the two of you sway as if you were about to start a waltz. in the end your tears began to dry and a light giggle bubbled from your throat.

that's right. argenti might always leave to spread the word of his aeon to the vast galaxies, but he'll come back to you and your little house by the hill.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

— losing dog. ft. gallagher

— warnings: angst (still LMAOO), mentions of using cigarettes

— author's note: little miss loves to write angst lol enjoy :3

siobhan’s bar is as lively as ever. her mixing drinks as the flashing lights never ceased. she made conversation with customers like how a fallen leaf would cascade down a stream – graceful and effortless.

you’re snapped out of your stupor when the strange combination of tobacco and sweet candy invaded your senses. you could sense him just by the way his feet struck the ground. like how lightning would strike down a poor tree in its rage; you would recognize even in his ugliest form and still call him beautiful.

“fancy seeing you here, [name].” his voice was as suave as ever. a cheeky and teasing smile as he took the seat beside you. “you haven’t been drinking without me, have you?” you only shook your head in amusement. siobhan had noticed his presence and quickly excused herself to attend to him.

“what drink will you order tonight boss?” she pressed a firm hand on her hip as gallagher stroked his chin in contemplation. he snapped his finger and leaned over the counter, “i’ll have a rouge era for tonight.” siobhan nodded and went straight to work leaving the two of you behind.

from the corner of your eye, you see gallagher take out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. noticing your stare, he gazed at you with a lazy smile and offered you a smoke. you gingerly took one from the freshly opened box and waited for him to hand over his lighter, but he never did.

“are you not going to let me light it?” you ask him but he only chuckled, tucking away the lighter back in his pocket. 

your eyes widened when his arm snaked behind your head and pushed it towards his. you let out a noise that was a mixture between a protest and squeak that made gallagher chuckle. he held his cigar steady his hands as he lit up yours with his own. a stream of smoke rises into the air and when yours has been lit, he casually let go of his hold on you and leaned back on his chair.

“there,” he said without a care in the world. “now it's lit.”

you take a big inhale of your cigar. the burning feeling of smoke entering your system as you exhaled deeply with a shake of your head. taking your drink that’s been sitting on the counter for too long, you take a ginger sip as you peaked at gallagher who was already looking at you.

after his drink was made, siobhan left the two of you alone. she probably noticed the tense air that sat on your shoulders so she wanted to give you two some space.

gallagher doesn’t like the silence that sat with the two of you so he took it upon himself to chatter away; talking about the sweet dream’s specialty then it was the history of syrups and soulglad. then he spoke of the secret on how to match a drink’s aroma and flavor to its drinker’s personality perfectly. 

you don’t know how long he had chartered away but it must have been a long while because siobhan is now handing him the keys to her bar as the last customers finally got up to leave. the cigar you’ve been smoking has been long finished and has been laying limplessly in your fingers as siobhan bid you two good night.

“for someone who loves to prattle about deep relationships with drinks and its drinker,” you say swishing your drink in its cup, “you don’t really make an effort to keep the relationships you make stay afloat, do you, officer?”

you needn’t explain further on what you meant. if you could recognize gallagher with the way his feet struck the ground, then he could as well. gallagher could recognize you even when blind. the way you only clink the rims of your cups together in cheers, or when you hold a cigarette in between your middle and ring finger. gallagher could recognize you even in death because you bring him to life.

“i already said sorry, didn’t i?” he knew sorry wasn’t enough but he didn’t want the mood to plummet down even further so tried to chuckle it away. “what? should i get on one knee and beg for your forgiveness now?”

maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say so he sighed deeply when you remained strained on your drink. he stood up from his seat and took hold of yours. strong arms caging you in your chair as you finally looked at him behind your bangs.

“i really am sorry, [name].”

you know he meant it. you just didn’t want to accept it.

a bitter chuckle left your lips as you cup his face with the hand that held your already used cigar. like a dog, gallagher nuzzled the side of his face into your palm, his stubble pricking your hand but it didn’t bother you. his hand came to hold yours as he pressed a kiss on your wrist – right where your pulse would be.

“i wish we could stay like this forever.” you say above whisper as you let gallagher kiss up your arm until you could his warm breath on your ear. “the streets are scary when it's night time.” 

you felt your hand slip from his face and lay limp at your side but gallagher’s own gloved hand came to hold yours in a vice grip. despite the cloth being a barrier you felt his coldness spread throughout your palm.

“don’t worry,” you felt something slip in your finger as gallagher pulled away. he gave you another cheeky smile, “i’m your guard dog aren’t i?”

you turned off all the lights and locked siobhan’s bar. double and triple checking to make sure everything was in place. shoving the keys in your coat pocket, you speed walk down the dimly lit streets, trying to keep your paranoia at bay. 

you look up at the sky remembering the story you told a pesky little dog in one of your visits. 

a man blessed by the gods would traverse the depths of hell for the return of his beloved. all he needed to do was to never look back as he held her hand. 

“would you look back?” the dog asks you. “if he didn’t look back, it would mean he loved her less, wouldn’t it?”

you laughed at the dog for his answer. but when the same fateful day comes to you, you can’t help but frown, because the dog was right.

“no one can change the ending of their story,” it never rains in the dreamscapes, it is a perfect paradise after all, but strangely enough you felt the ghost of raindrops fall on your coat and soak through your clothes like tears. “orpheus will always turn to look back at eurydice; to love is to turn around. there is no other version where orpheus doesn’t.”

and so you did. you turned to look back at the dog who lazily leaned at one of the walls as he waved you goodbye. you’ve betted on a losing dog, but you didn’t regret it; not one bit, not when that same dog got on one knee the other day with a ring pop in hand and slipped it on your finger. and that same dog who lazily waved goodbye was the same dog who slipped an actual ring on your finger a couple hours ago.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

𐙚 my love, mine all mine.

— some headcanons about certain things the hsr men would do while in a relationship.

— warnings: none

— author's notes: self-indulgent, once again credits to @.cafekitsune for the banners. this is lowkey dedicated to the stellaronhvnters <3

𐙚  AVENTURINE 

would always accompany you on your spontaneous night drives around pier point. before you can even leave your room to drag aventurine to his car, he’s already leaning on your doorframe, his car keys in hand as he flashes you a smile; not the gambler like smile he shows to his enemies but a child-like one filled with uncontained excitement and wonder. 

its half past midnight and your both in your pajamas (he insisted that you both wear matching ones) as he rolls down the roof of his very expensive car to let the wind flow with your hair. your phone connected to the speakers as you blasted your shared playlist. loud enough to satisfy your needs to have a mini carpool karaoke session but quiet enough you won’t disturb any civilians trying to sleep the night away.

aventurine shakes his head in fondness and amusement when you scold him as he skipped a song he didn’t particularly like. the pout on your lips would soon fade as he reached to pull you by the chin and give you a peck on the lips. your nagging turned into panic as you hit him in the arms for not keeping his eyes on the road.

𐙚 VERITAS RATIO

always comes home exhausted. even in his tired and slightly dazed state, he always comes home at exactly 7 pm and each time his arms wouldn’t fail to snake around your waist and his lips press a soft kiss on your neck in greeting.

when you ask about his day, the doctor just grumbles and complains about his students. but you knew deep down he was proud of them after they finally managed to solve this one particular problem he gave them without his help. they’ve been making fast progress, he once stated, making a smile bloom on your face when he checks their papers.

you chuckle under your breath as ratio continues to chatter away about his students' progress. your back flushed into his sturdy chest while arms kept a steady hold of you – tight enough that you could feel his muscles but still be able to move around the kitchen. a melody starts to fall from your lips as you hummed and swayed, and ratio follows with his own humming as you both start a pseudo dance in the middle of making dinner.

𐙚 BOOTHILL

date nights with boothill usually consisted of going bar hopping and hiding away in a dark alley as the IPC passed by. you’ve grown fond of the excitement as your lover drags you out the bar with officers high on your tails. it never fails to rip out an uncharacteristic laugh from you and cherry grin from him.

tonight was a lot tamer than other nights. sitting in a bar counter, a cup of whiskey boothill had asked you to hold while he gets another bounty for the both of you. he knows you wouldn’t take a single sip of his drink, your alcohol tolerance was nonexistent he says making you roll your eyes. your peaceful night was disturbed when a new face popped out from seemingly nowhere, taking the seat your lover once occupied as the man tried to buy you a drink

boothill always had impeccable timing. just as the man was about to take a hold of your – his – glass, a cold arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you back into a firm chest. you try to look up but a familiar hat was instead placed over your eyes as the glass in your hand was taken. the liquid disappeared in a flash as boothill downs it in one go. just to prove his point, he gingerly lifts his hat over your face and press a kiss at the corner of your lips, making it known to the man that you were with him.

𐙚 SUNDAY

not many would believe you if you told them the stories of how easily flustered the head of the oak family. everyone would picture him as a full package gentleman – opening doors for you, pulling back your seat, pressing a kiss to your knuckles, etc. – but what they don’t know is that, in your relationship, the one being worshiped wasn’t you.

without a doubt, you were the one who always opened the door to his office for him, offering to carry his things even if he protested, even going to one knee to tie the laces of his shoes. sunday was always in competition when it came to being a gentleman and he always loses to you every time. and he doesn’t make any effort to make you stop despite his embarrassment; one drag of your knuckles under his eyes when he’s overworked and tired and he’s putty in your hands.

how could he resist your pampering when you always take off his gloves when it's just you two in his office, pressing a delicate kiss to his knuckles and whispering sweet nothings to him. admiring the writing calluses on his right hand as you talk about your day. 

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

𐙚 shelter from storms.

— how is life when you're living with the stellaron hunters.

— warnings: none

— author's notes: sunday is a stellaron hunter just trust me, these can be taken as romantic or platonic except for silver wolf, hers is purely platonic. once again credits to @.cafekitsune for the banners.

𐙚 KAFKA

one day brought a record player back to headquarters after a mission. she happily skipped over to you to inquire about the spare room that hasn’t been used in years. and that’s how you got roped into decorating the said room with kafka, making it her pseudo music room whenever it's her day off. 

she even convinced you to pick up the violin and practice with her. it was hard at first - you had no past experience with playing an instrument - but kafka was patient, taking her time to teach you how to properly hold the violin, how to press on the strings correctly so it doesn’t sound strained when you glide the bow over it. more often than not, you’d call it quits after an hour and a half and simply just listen to kafka play. these were the times where she became more expressive so you cherished it.

after practice she would tell you about the local music from the planet she went to for her mission. retelling in great detail how the musician played the piece, how the crowd gathered and clapped once the person finished. you can’t help but let the growing smile on your face show. kafka doesn’t show that much emotion - a big consequence of being an emanator of the nihility - but you knew deep down that kafka was kind a person, even if the universe said otherwise.

𐙚 BLADE

is the type of person that would eat whatever you offer him without question. you were quite shocked when it first happened – you had dragged him to one of the stalls on the luofu to eat a snack and when you offered him a bite, he took it. you stood frozen in your spot as blade chewed his food, muttering a soft praise for how it was cooked and started to drag you away from the stall. a certain head of white had slowly started to approach the two of you.

when silver wolf and firefly found out, they were certainly amused, the former more so than the latter. and since then, whenever you and silver wolf would practice cooking when kafka wasn’t around, you would drag blade into the kitchen and spoon feed him the food you made. you found it endearing when his voice would grow soft whenever firefly or silver wolf offered him a spoonful of food and he’d take it without hesitation. giving constructive criticism and even assisting the three of you whenever he’s feeling nice.

though you’ve learned how not to push his buttons too much. after silver wolf accidentally (it was on purpose) put sugar instead of salt in his food, you had to pull the man back by the arm so he didn’t kill the poor girl. 

𐙚 SILVER WOLF

kafka laughed under her breath as blade groaned. there you two go again, stopping your actions whenever you pass each other in the halls just to stare, then laugh, and proceed as if nothing had happened. you don’t remember when this started or how it even came to be, it just became a silly little greeting between the two of you that made blade think the two of you were insane. but then again, who wasn’t insane in this organization?

when silver wolf first became a hunter she was quite the pissy baby, sam often left her in your care, maybe that's why you always sought out each other’s presence when it's your day offs. kafka joked how the two of you must be siblings separated by birth and that led to her dragging you into her room, a whiteboard behind her and a marker perched on her ear, trying to explain how you two were actually siblings. 

she’s grown quite attached to you, always the first one to greet you when you come back from a mission and drag you to her room so you can play video games together. time spent with each other is always fun and full of laughter, you can’t help but wish time would move slower so you could spend more time with her. when kafka comes to drag you out of her room because it was 3 am and you’ve lost track of time, you can’t help but miss the girl’s laughter as you yet again, lost your combo on one of her favorite rhythm games.

𐙚 FIREFLY

ever since you joined the stellaron hunters, sam and elio have given you full reign in being their mechanic/inventor. it was a great honor and you took pleasure whenever the hunters trusted your inventions and used them in battle. the biggest downside would probably be is being in charge of cleaning sam’s armor when missions get too rough. before you, kafka would always be the one in charge of this but after your arrival, firefly seems to only want you to clean it, especially when silver wolf tried to doodle on sam’s WHITE ARMOR with pastel markers. 

your station was always filled with easygoing chatter between you and firefly. she would tell you about how her mission went, what happened, what needed to be fixed and if there were any adjustments needed to be made. you always listened with keen eagerness, pausing every once in a while at wiping off the grime and dirt on sam and writing something on the clipboard that’s always on your desk.

aeons bless this girl’s heart because she was a total sweetheart. most of the time you never get the chance to keep up with the trends among the cosmos so she took it upon herself to always keep you updated. even when she was on missions, she never fails to send you a text on the new trending fashion, makeup, and even food. speaking of makeup, you should start wrapping that set you managed to snag online. it was a thank you gift for firefly for always keeping you updated.

𐙚 SUNDAY

hesitation, regret, but quiet determination. that was your first impression of sunday when kafka entered your station with him in tow. a pair of mechanical wings to replace his broken one, kafka said before abruptly leaving. he was hesitant to let you near his wings but eventually caved after lots and lots of reassurances that it would be quick. when you finished, you kept a close eye on him whenever he practiced taking flight with it, always remembering to keep a good distance so you don’t invade his comfort zone.

wincing when sunday stumbled for the seventh time today. sweat dripping from his forehead to chin as he tried and tried again, trying to take flight again after years of chaining himself to the ground. it was painful to watch, but you can’t help but feel proud of his determination to make it work. a smile crept up to your face as you scribbled something down on your clipboard when he nearly made it. you made a mental note to reshape the wings a bit and use a different type of material so it didn’t weigh him down too much.

sunday may not show it, but he knows you’re watching from afar, he's happy you keep him company in his trying times, it makes his failures in taking flight a little more bearable. he couldn’t help but feel thankful to his hereditary genes of being able to sense the emotions of others, he just wished you could do the same. you have no idea how grateful he is that you’re taking so much of his comfort and needs into account when creating his wings. he could only offer you a small smile when he knocks at your door to announce dinner. sunday swore to take you to penacony one day when kafka mentioned you’ve always wanted to travel there.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

— retail therapy. ft sunday

— warnings: slight angst if you squint hard enough

— author's note: self-indulgent stellaron hunter sunday after playing the new tb quest. ~2.4k words.

“is this…” sunday gestures with his hands, “also part of our script?”

you let out a laugh. balancing firefly and kafka’s shopping bags in your hands, you only shook your head at the angel-like man with an amused smile on your lips. 

“no, it is not.” kafka was browsing the dress sections with keen interest, blade was peering over silver wolf’s shoulder watching her as she played yet another video game, and firefly was looking over the rack of new hats. “but it’s a good change of pace. you all deserve to relax after such a hard mission.”

“i don’t think this really fits my criteria of relaxation, [name].” you only laugh at sunday’s sigh. offering him a small pat on the back and dragging him by his sleeve to where kafka was beckoning you over. “you’ll get used to it eventually. next time, we’ll do something that fits your criteria of relaxation.”

the silver haired man only shook his head. but deep down you knew he was enjoying himself – the wings behind his ears often betrayed him by openly showing what he actually felt. every now and then, they would flutter and puff up whenever silver wolf drags him to another section with new games or when he tries to deny kafka’s attempt at getting him a new shirt or coat (after his wings fluttered a bit too hard at this one coat kafka bought it immediately).

“what do you think?” you ask as you put down the bags that've been weighing down on your arms. “about us, i mean, are you adjusting well?”

you notice sunday’s hesitation, you always have when it comes to him – he often wonders how wise and knowledgeable you are to know how he felt. a hum left your lips as you sat down on one of the offered chairs at the shoe section while blade reached to the top shelf to get what firefly was pointing at. 

“i…” he starts, voice just above whisper. “don’t know.”

another hum escapes your lips. scooting over to make space for him and patting the space, urging him to sit besides you. sunday does, though reluctantly, sit beside you as you watch silver wolf giggle at firefly’s struggle to walk in heels. blade’s hands hover over her figure as she stomps her way over to the shorter girl to pinch her cheeks to which she protested.

“they’re nice people.” you say, gaze never leaving them. “the galaxies may say otherwise, but they're truly the kindest people i have ever met.”

“i… apologize.”

you raise a brow at him. “what’s with the apology?” 

“i have only ever thought of the five of you as bad people.” sunday admits with a heavy heart. eyes finding much entertainment on his gloves that you had gifted. “i… do not know how to act around you all, when i’ve only ever heard bad things about you. it feels wrong to suddenly be thrusted into your already tight knit group.”

you only hum in understanding. hand coming to caress the top of his head when you stood up when blade called you over.

“we understand, mr. sunday.” you gave him a small smile as you picked up the many shopping bags you had. “these sorts of things take time, just take it one step at a time.”

he only nods. and like the gentleman that he is, steals away the heavier bags in your hands with an awkward smile.

—

“do you miss the person you were before you joined?”

you wonder if blade has ever mentioned to sunday how you loved thought evoking questions like the one he had just asked. recently, the two have been paired up a lot for missions - you’re still on the fence on whether it's a good or bad thing, but you’re leaning more towards the former. you only gave a thoughtful hum as you spooned another scoop of ice cream into your mouth.

kafka had grown bored of the dresses and shoes and wanted to get something to eat. now here you were, outside a quaint little ice cream shop as blade orders for everyone - silver wolf and firefly hiding behind the man like two kids. 

sunday was sitting in front of you, laughing silently after catching a glimpse of the two tables across from you being filled with your shopping bags. you laughed as well and when your eyes met his, sunday quickly averted his gaze towards his own cold treat.

“do i ever miss the person i was before i joined…” you echo his question. “sometimes, in the middle of the night whenever i’m feeling a bit too sentimental, i do.” a fond expression was probably present on your face as sunday hummed in acknowledgement. “i miss the comfort of my bed as i scrolled endlessly on my phone. or how a certain little creature in red would bring me tea and biscuits when i let time pass in my little workshop. i miss them every chance i get.”

yes, every chance you get, you reminisce over your past life. missing your father’s quick temper, your brother’s indifference, your mother’s absence; you missed them all, despite all their flaws and the bitterness that swam in your heart. and of course, how could you ever forget your little escapades in different planets with a seasoned adventurer and his vast knowledge of animation and travel or the little waddling of a conductor as they scold you nearly not making it back. you missed them all very dearly.

“what about you, mr. sunday? do you miss penacony?”

“would it be wrong of me… if i said no…?”

admittedly, that was the exact opposite of what you thought his answer would be.

the six of you were now in the car with you and blade driving (firefly suggested you all take two cars so you won’t have to be squeezed together in one). silver wolf was fast asleep at the back seat, using the many shopping bags as her makeshift pillows. you and sunday sat at the front, keeping a close eye on blade’s red car in front of you as you pondered what you would say next.

“i don’t think that’s the whole truth, but it’s not an entire lie either.” was your only response. from the corner of your eye, you see sunday take off his gloves and lay them on his lap. “would you like to talk about it, mr. sunday? i’m quite the exceptional listener you know.”

sunday laughed at your jesting and that made the breath you were unconsciously holding escape you. 

“penacony, as beautiful as it was,” he fiddles with his fingers as his wings came to cover half his face - a habit you picked up on whenever he started to open up. “it was simply too much for me.”

staying silent and when sunday looked at you, you simply nod. urging him to continue.

“the flashy city lights, the ever echoing of upbeat music, to many, penacony is a paradise where nothing could go wrong,” sunday sags in his seat, “but i often wonder if it ever gets too much for them. even though i have lived my entire life in the land of festivities, i could not bring myself to enjoy the thrill and joy it offered.”

“no matter how many times i bury these feelings of guilt, they always resurface whenever…”

“whenever?” you slowly try to coax it out of him. like how a parent would to their child.

“they always resurface whenever… i find myself enjoying your company too much.” you try to hide your shock when you take a right turn. “is it truly alright for me to just leave all of penacony behind? as overwhelming it was, it offered a roof over my head. food on my table. a family.”

soft patters of rain as small droplets of water cascaded down the now slightly fogged up windows of your car. “would you like my personal opinion on this matter, mr. sunday?” the car skids to a stop as the traffic light glows red. sunday only nodded solemnly. “you have every right to not miss penacony.”

his gold eyes were furrowed in distraught. gaze boring into the side of your head as the car started moving again. “yes, penacony offered a roof over your head and food on your table, but everyone has that right. even us, stellaron hunters, the most wanted criminals across star systems, have the right to have a home. did penacony ever feel like home to you, mr. sunday?”

“no. not it has not.” sunday replies after a few moments of silence.

“just because a roof is over your head and food is served on your table doesn’t automatically make it a home.” your eyes hardened, grip on the steering wheel tightening ever so slightly. “a home is supposed to make you feel safe, not obligated to repay their so-called “kindness”. you don’t have to feel guilty for not wanting to come back to the place that had caused you pain.”

“and what of my sister, robin?” he suddenly counters. you knew from little snippets from kafka that robin was a bit of a sensitive topic with him. “am i really allowed to enjoy this new life of mine knowing that she’s still in the family’s clutches?” his voice hardened, but at the same time it quivered and broke. “what right do i have to this newfound happiness when she could be struggling? for aeon’s sake,” he messily pushes his hair away from his face. you try not to focus on the stray tears that fell from his eyes, “i’m her older brother, her protector. she should be the one here, spending time with you and enjoying the life she’s always wanted.”

“miss robin is destined for greatness and a happy life,” stopping at another traffic light, you look over to sunday, “but so are you. i do not know the pain and turmoil your adoptive father has made you go through, but you will never be free if you keep holding on to the past.”

“i don’t think being a stellaron hunter and a wanted criminal is what you call greatness.” sunday jokes with a low chuckle making you roll your eyes.

you trained your sight on the road again. “it’s not easy to break out of whatever gopher wood has taught you,” the way you spat his adoptive father’s name with such venom made sunday wonder if you had personally met him. “but if, theoretically, we had offered you to join us earlier and to sneak you out of penacony, miss robin would be the first person to urge you to take that chance. you are her older brother yes, and it's often the oldest’s job to protect the younger,” you pull up your car in the parking lot as blade, kafka, and firefly started taking the shopping bags out of the car. “but she is still your sister that wants what’s best for you, even if it means leaving penacony behind.”

the sight of blade, a man with a harsh exterior and few words, silently carry silver wolf with such care will always stir something inside of sunday. or how kafka would happily chat with firefly over the new clothes they got on today’s shopping list, promising to do a haul tomorrow morning after the older woman cooks everyone breakfast. but if there was something that pulled at his heart the most, it would be you. 

you who kindly respected his space and unwillingness to talk or socialize with the other hunters when he had been first recruited. the same you who had made him the metal wings that was now attached to his lower back - created with so much care and attentiveness sunday felt unworthy of it. you who would always be the first one to look for him whenever you were going out and extending a hand for him to take.

“everyone deserves to be happy,” you say beside him as you drop him off at the door to his room. “and that includes you, mr. sunday.”

sunday had always been treated as someone who was above everything else, that was the first thing he was taught after all. he was destined for greatness, the key to the revival of his dead aeon. so he never truly knew how to act when someone treated him as an equal. someone neither above or below anyone.

“i’m not very good with words,” sunday scoffs, thinking otherwise. “so i often convey my sincerity and comfort through actions.”

sunday feels your hand slither to the back of his neck as you slowly pull him down to your height. forcing his beating heart to still when he looks into your eyes that swam with understanding and fondness when you press both of your foreheads together.

“you can enjoy your time here, with us. you’re allowed to let go of the past and miss your sister.” your thumb rubs soothing circles on his nape, sunday feels the hairs on his arms rise. “and if you still think otherwise, then that’s also fine. breaking free from the shackles of your past isn’t easy, but you shouldn’t give up.” sunday feels the way your words leave a warm ticklish feeling on his lips, he had to fight the urge to lean into your space even more. “we want you to be happy, we want you to be here with us. so we’ll teach you how to let go. until you can do it yourself.”

sunday has seen you do this to others; after you patch up blade after a nasty fight, when you welcome kafka home, when silver wolf comes to you after a nightmare and when firefly bares her heart out to you. he finally understands why the others stuck to you closely, they showed their appreciation for you in forms of physical affections. 

involuntarily, his arms snakes around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer he feels you may decipher the way his heart beats your name. “may we stay like this for a while?” you only hum slowly when he lays his head on your shoulder. letting your comfort wash away all the guilt and frustration, even if it was just for a moment.

you catch a glimpse of kafka leaning at one of the dark walls with a knowing smile on her lips. rolling your eyes at the older woman, you bid sunday a good night with a small smile. knuckles brushing right under his eyes where phantom tears had fallen. in your mind, you can’t help but feel that your little idea of taking him shopping to brighten up his mood was a success.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

— unfinished business.

starring: stellaron hunter!sunday x gn!reader + the other stellaron hunters.

premise: on his first mission with the stellaron hunters, sunday hesitates, unable to push through. frustrated, you step in, taking on the task. when danger strikes, Sunday becomes your unexpected savior. the mission succeeds, but sunday is left wondering about your unfinished business in the capital of passion and your mysterious past before you joined the team.

— warnings: slight angst + arguments.

— author's note: another sunday fic to the collection yippie. pic credits to @helen_zzhao. | ~3.4k words.

the capital of passion always looked magnificent at night. here you were with your fellow hunters and your boss - in his cat form - standing above the capital at its highest peak. flashing lights of neon blues, pinks, and yellows obscured the night sky you preferred to look at when the moon was present. you were sitting on one of the ventilations of the building you were all standing on, silver wolf leaning on the railing playing video games, blade in some corner with his sword close to his chest and eyes strained away from the bright lights, and sunday stood awkwardly standing next to you with elio perched in your lap.

“you already know what to do right, mister?” silver wolf suddenly looks up from her game and drops a silver disc right in front of her. a hologram of the city below you showed up and two glowing yellow dots were running away from the blue dots who you assumed were the public security regulation. “we split up and corner the messengers, interrogate said messengers for more information about the supposed discontinued project, and leave before security catches us. ”

silver wolf looked at sunday with a different glint in her eyes. “you can do a simple task like this right?” 

the man beside you crossed his arms together over his chest and gripped them tightly. brows knitting together in contemplation as his mouth opened just to close again. continuous beeping noises that sounded like alarms from the disc made you suddenly stand up. “they’re changing their course. i thought they mostly traveled in the skies? why are they suddenly using the alleyways?”

“we don’t have time.” blade interrupted with a pointed look to sunday. “can you or can you not do it? the clock is ticking.”

you look at sunday worriedly who has still yet to say another word. “i–”

“mister make up your mind, we’re going to lose them!” silver wolf shouted in worry. taking out her phone and quickly punching a few buttons. red rectangles appeared on a holographic map of the city, closing any passages the messenger could take to escape. “we need to go, like right now!”

you looked towards blade who was already getting ready to jump off the rooftop to chase the messengers. his intense gaze never once left sunday’s figure who continued to shrink more into the shadow. 

“i can’t… i’m sorry.” sunday murmured, hand tightening their hold on his arms. you try not to show how your  eyes widened in disbelief but with the way he avoided looking into your eyes, you couldn’t help the bubbling of frustration that started to fester in your chest.

silver wolf was always calm under pressure so it was strange to see her so shaken. “are you kidding me?!” she stomped towards sunday and pointed an accusing finger to sunday. tapping at his chest multiple times to emphasize her frustration. “you said you were ready! we did not just waste weeks worth of our time to train you for this mission only for you to say that you can’t do it?!”

“silvy come on, give him a break.” you tried to but in, keeping your own frustration hidden behind an understanding smile. “this is his first mission; a complete one-eighty of what he’s used to.”

“you’re being too soft on him, [name]!” a timer of 15 minutes suddenly appeared on the map. “we’re here on a mission. we could get caught!”

“silver wolf is right, [name].” you look at the black cat that sat by sunday’s legs. their head turned to look at sunday but the man only looked away in shame, wings covering his face. “you’ve agreed to become a hunter, mr. sunday. and you’ve also agreed to participate in this mission. need i remind you of the consequences when you don’t follow the script?”

elio never truly intimidated you, not when you first joined, on your first mission, or just in general. but with the way he was sizing up sunday with such judgement made the hairs on your arms and neck raise in realization. elio might have been kind to you, but they weren’t so much with others.

you look back to the map and blade, and then the timer that continues to tick. “i’ll go.”

“what?!” silver wolf’s attention was now on you. and so was everyone else's. “no one knows you’re a stellaron hunter! if anyone were to catch a glimpse of you all your hard work will be for nothing!”

“do you really want to risk that, [name]? ” blade asked, pushing you back to where sunday and elio stood. you felt their gaze on you as you stepped forward and pushed past blade. with a single tap on your earpiece a visor appeared in front of your eyes and showed you the map of the city. the same glowing yellow dots.

“[name].” elio warns.

“i’ll take the one in the west, the rest of you take the north.” you heard a collective shout of your name but you already jumped off. 

the city was more jam-packed than you had imagined. though you were in the alleyways of the capital, bags of trash, old mechanical parts, and even trashed prosthetics laid on the ground making it hard to navigate through the already dimmed path.

you kept a close eye on the yellow dot just a few feet in front of you. furrowing your brows in confusion when it suddenly turned around and started charging in your directions. too focused on the map showing on your visor, you fail to notice the glinting piece of metal that was thrown straight at your head. 

something warm encapsulated your body. you suddenly felt an arm wrap around your waist and your head as the figure in a cloak jumped over your body. a grunt left your savior’s lips making you turn around.

“sunday?!” he only gave you a flustered smile as you sat on his lap. 

“hello…” he replied as you quickly stood up and helped him up. checking over your visor just to see that the yellow dot had taken a different route that you predicted. a curse left your lips as you kicked the trash bags in front of you.

“bladie they're coming your way. be careful, they're armed.” you heard a soft roger from the other end as your visor shut off. you look back to sunday who was dusting off his clothes. your brows knit together in confusion. “what are you doing here?”

he looked shocked by your question but quickly masked it. “i’m here to finish my mission.”

“i thought you said you couldn’t do it?” you wonder what kind of expression you were making to suddenly make the ever so composed sunday squirm.

“blade is right.” he takes a step forward and pushes your hair out of your eyes. wincing when his gloved finger suddenly grazed over the scratch you didn’t even know you had. “you’re too soft on me, [name].”

you raise a brow at him. “would you prefer i be a bit sterner then?”

sunday must have taken your words lightly because he only shook his head in amusement with a small smile on his lips. normally you would smile with him but this time a deep frown tugged at your lips. “i’m being serious, sunday.” 

he ceased his silent laughter and looked at your eyes. “because i will be more strict with you if you’re going to continue acting like this in future missions.”

his shoulders tensed when you turned around, back facing him as you started to walk away back to your meeting point. no doubt silver wolf and blade must have caught one of the messengers and brought them back to the rooftop. 

“let’s go back to our meeting point.” you didn’t wait for his reply when you started scaling up the walls of the alleys. clicking your tongue in disgust when you felt the grime stick to your fingers. 

“are you mad?” 

“excuse me?”

the both of you stopped. just a few feet away from you, you catch a glimpse of elio playing with the holograms. signaling you both to return to continue the interrogation. the night is going to be over soon and you’ve spent enough time running around trying to catch a wild goose.

“of course i’m mad!” you looked at him in disbelief as your voice raised in volume. “sunday, we're in a capital that's being run by a government body who doesn't care about privacy. the fact that we haven't been caught yet is a miracle!” you take a deep inhale and pinch the bridge of your nose. “you said you were ready. that you can finally start taking missions. elio prepared you a script and we helped you train for weeks. so i’m sorry if i’m mad that most of our efforts are going down the drain.”

sunday looked away. he almost looked bashful with one arm brushing up the other. “i apologize. i truly thought i was ready. but with the way you’re treating these people, i couldn’t help but think you’ll–”

“kill them?” he winced at your blunt reply. you continued making your way back to the rooftop, not bothering to slow down your pace as sunday followed you from a good distance. “we’re going to interrogate them. this is your first mission, we aren’t going to make you dirty your hands this early.”

sunday stood incredibly still. as if he's only realizing now what he's really gotten himself into. “so you do plan on making me a murderer.”

you scoffed as you pushed back your hair. taking a deep breath, you steadied your voice. “sunday, we’re wanted criminals.” your eyes narrowing down to glare as sunday tried to challenge you. “why do you think everyone has a bounty in the millions? of course we’ve murdered people. that’s our job.”

“this isn’t right.” he argued. 

“well tough shit.” his eyes went wide, mouth opening slightly but closed just as fast. you weren’t one to curse or even raise your voice but tonight you were losing your cool. “sunday, you agreed to join us. of course you’ll have to get your hands dirty later on. you should be grateful elio gave you such an easy mission that doesn’t require that much force.”

“then what about you?” sunday knew he was pushing his limits, but he still continued. “if you’re all criminals then why have i not seen even a single wanted poster of you?”

sunday quickly regretted asking that when a wave of sadness washed over you. lips pressed together into a thin line as your hands curl into fists, knuckles turning white and slightly shaking. the two of you would’ve stood in silence forever if it weren’t for elio playing with the hologram. you quickly teared your gaze away from him and started to walk away in silence.

“we’re trying to do what’s best for you, sunday.” you say softly. “the consequences of the script getting derailed are catastrophic. trust me,” there was a certain edge to your voice when you turned to look at him. the bright lights of the capital casting a faint glow over your figure making the air sunday tried to inhale get lodged in his throat. “i know what kind of cataclysm might fall if you go off script.”

you reached the meeting point roughly 5 minutes later. elio was licking at his paw and meowed when they saw your figure approaching. squatting down to pet their head, you allow them to rub at your legs before clawing at sunday’s pants and climbing to his shoulders. the halovian let out a sound between a squeak and a groan, normally this would rip out a giggle out of you but your eyes remained focused on the man sitting by the ventilation with his arms tied behind his back. the man cracked one eye open and when his gaze fell over you he started scooting backwards.

“I-its… you…” your brows furrow together as sunday came to stand beside you, the same expression on his face.

“do you know him?”

you shake your head. “no, i don’t.”

taking a step forward, the man cowered and shook like a leaf, leaving you and sunday confused. “how are you alive?!” you were about to question him when he quickly followed it up with something you believed you wouldn’t ever hear again. “you’re that doctor from the train! you were supposed to be dead, i saw the explosion and you were caught in it!”

a lodge appeared in your throat. no sound left your lips when you squatted down to the man’s height to question. suddenly, sunday’s gold eyes felt too heavy and questioning even though you couldn’t see them. you curl your hand into a fist and let out a shaky sigh. closing your eyes to calm the drumming in your ears and heart. this was not the time to look back on the accident that happened amber eras ago.

“oh triple-faced soul,” you hear sunday approach from behind. “please sear his tongue and palms with a hot iron,” the air suddenly turned warm as a gloved hand wrapped around your arm pulling you up and tugging you to his side.“so that he will not be able to fabricate lies and make false vows.”

elio jumped into your arms, tapping a paw at your chin making you look up at sunday with worried eyes. “this will be faster.” he said, waiting for you to ask the question you had prepared beforehand.

taking a deep breath, you take out your phone and give it to sunday. he nodded at you, a hand came to the small of your back to steady you. your mind swam with questions on how this man knew about the explosion, you were very sure that no one was there to see it. “come to my office after the mission.” elio spoke softly, breaking you out of your nightmares.

“question: what do you know of the windborne project?” sunday questions, his golden stare narrowed dangerously at the man’s figure.

“it’s a discontinued project,” the man gulped before continuing. “there were too many errors and too few researchers. the blueprints were leaked by an old messenger and not long after, the others were captured by the public security regulation.”

“do you know who leaked the blueprint? what about the original creator?”

“we don’t know! everyone assumed that a rat had gotten in through some means and leaked it.”

“do you possess the blueprint of the windborne project?”

the man hesitated. he started taking sharp inhales and let out shaky exhales. hands started shaking in his restraints as sunday took a step forward and kneeled to the man’s level. golden eyes not once faltering.

“i will ask you again, do you possess the blueprint of the windborne project?”

“y-yes!” the man cried out. “it’s in my bag, you can have it, so please, spare me..” 

you let go of elio gently and made your way to the stray bag in one of the corners. zipping it open you pull out a gray cylinder and wouldn’t you know, the words “windborne” were written in white marker. taking off the lid and sliding out the paper, you open it and let out a hum.

“continue with the interrogation,” you tell sunday, taking out a pen from your pocket and started writing on the blueprint. circling and crossing out words like the materials needed, the measurements and instructions on how its supposed to be used.

“where can we find the holo-wings?” you felt sunday’s eyes flicker over to you but you pay it no mind.

“the tech labs in arcadia research department. they’ve been manufacturing them in secret and selling them in the underground markets.”

you hum and write more stuff down. “ask him about the nano-actuators.”

“and what about the nano-actuators? where can we get them?”

“cybernetic shops. their found all across the capital.”

“cybernetic shops…” you mutter after circling another portion of the words on the blueprint. after a few more notes, you roll up the blueprint and put it back in its cylinder. “you can let him go now, we’re done here.”

sunday stood up and dusted his pants, letting go of the man from his trance. a shiver went up your spine when he looked at you, the remnants of the order’s power swimming in them before they all vanished when he blinked. you follow his gaze towards the cylinder in your hand but made no move to question it.

“i told you everything i know, so please let me go…!” the man cried out with tears in his eyes.

“not yet,” you reply with a monotone voice. “my other friends still want something from you.”

his eyes widened and continued to thrash in his restraints. you only shake your head and pull out your phone to text silver wolf and blade for any updates. “are you really a nameless?” the man beside asked with so much gentleness. your initial frustration washed away completely you began to wonder if he was using his powers on you. but when you looked at his eyes, you saw nothing but sincere concern.

“was, sunday.” you look away from him and look over to the horizon, the sun is rising. 

“is it connected to the explosion the man said?” he asks, voice laced with concern and curiosity.

you press your lips together, looking down at the cylinder container in your hands. “it’s all in the past now. irrelevant pieces of information.” elio meows at you both and starts walking to where the stairs are. “this is a story better left unfinished, sunday. so please don’t try to see how it ends.”

the trip back home was quiet and awkward. you sat in the passenger seat this time while silver wolf and sunday sat in the back. every so often, sunday’s eyes would flick over to you. silently looking out the window, the cylinder in your lap as you drummed a beat on it to try and distract yourself from the fatigue of last night’s mission.

an elbow to his side made him wince slightly. he turned to glare at the girl beside him who showed her phone. sunday squinted his eyes in confusion when he read the message silver wolf sent to him.

favorite?

“we’re here.” blade’s voice cut through the quiet and still atmosphere. both sunday and silver wolf looked up from their phones just in time to see you leave the car with elio in tow. 

when everyone entered the building, you put the cylinder on one of the couches and greet firefly and kafka in the kitchen. briefly excusing yourself from the two and following elio down a corridor he’s never gone through before. 

sunday’s eyes never once left your figure even after you disappeared into a room with destiny’s slave. mind swimming with more questions about your past and yourself in general. he pondered on what silver wolf meant when you were elio’s favorite. not to mention the sudden info dump on you being an old nameless from the astral express. 

who exactly are you, [name]?

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

– a waltz with fate.

pairing: aventurine x gn!reader

premise: the fate of luck never had anything of great value after shedding his mortal shell, until you came to him for help. now, aventurine struggles against destiny to make sure you're not taken away from him for the second time.

– warnings: slight angst if you squint, reader is described as feminine and is called princess a few times but still use "you/they/them" pronouns, slight spoilers for events in once upon a broken heart.

– author's note: this is very once upon a broken hearted inspired so please go give it a read! art credits to @yeurei | ~3.1k words.

aventurine was not obsessed. one more visit didn’t equate to obsession. he simply wanted to make sure you were safe and sound; that you were still alive. yes, aventurine just wanted to double check that you weren’t bleeding on the shoulder like last time. in danger. unhappy. or uncomfortable. you were safe here, because he was watching over you.

a pained sigh left his lips as his hand came to ruffle his already unruly hair. his eyes scanning over your figure who slept soundly in the bed of your temporary room in penacony. aventurine clicked his tongue as he took a good look at the space. muted colors of silver, whites, and blues didn’t suit you. vibrant colors of yellows, pinks, and turquoise suited your rowdy personality better. these colors made you stand out even more, captivating everyone in the room with just a glance. 

“time to wake up now, friend.” he merrily whispered near your ear, so incredibly close it made him feel intimate. it left a painful tearing inside his already broken heart. as expected, you opened your bleary eyes at him. he saw how your lips tried to scream at him for sneaking into your room but it never left your throat as he throwed a dress right at your face. 

“the party is about to start,” he heard you shuffle out of bed and lay out the dress. “it’d be a shame if you were late.” aventurine threw a grin over his shoulder when you rolled your eyes at him. grin growing wider when he realized you planned on wearing the dress he picked out for you despite the irrelevant dress code of only wearing white, black and gold.

“how kind of you, lord aventurine.” there it was. the same playful lilt of your voice. 

you were growing too trustful of him again. aventurine didn’t know if his heart fluttered or broke into a million more pieces.

“well what can i say?” shrugging his shoulders he made his way to your balcony. “i’m feeling generous tonight. maybe i’ll even ask you for a dance tonight!”

another roll of your eyes and you're already waving him goodbye. “oh how marvelous! i’ll be sure to rub it on the poor faces of the ladies that would die to dance with you.”

aventurine let out a hearty laugh as he left your room with a single graceful jump. but his happiness was short lived when he spotted a familiar white snake coiling around the tree branch that was placed coincidentally right in front of your balcony. the man scoffed as the snake slithered down the tree and disappeared into the bushes. no doubt planning on telling its master of what it just saw. 

for the longest time, aventurine never minded the still and quietness of the night. but this time, the night was too cold for his liking. it may have been winter in penacony and the dress shirt he wore was thin and loose, the temperatures never bothered him. another sigh left his lips as he shoved his hands in his pockets and started walking to where this year’s charmony ball will be held. mentally preparing himself for the encounters he may stumble into for the night.

 – –

as expected of the family, the charmony ball looked like a fairytale stolen from a child’s storybook. the ballroom from the ceilings to the floors were covered with iridescent pearls and silver ornaments with touches of  gold here and there. some royals from all over the land were already on the dance floor, happily dancing to the beat of the music that played from the second floor. cheers and laughter echoed throughout the entire room, enchanting everyone inside.

“well don’t you look charming, lord aventurine.” 

aventurine pressed his lips into a firm line, his grip tightening on the golden goblet that his hand held. he needn't look to his side to know who had approached. her intimidating presence and captivating voice gave it all away. “as do you, lady bonajade. but you always look dazzling no matter what.”

jade chuckled and stood beside aventurine, much to his dismay. the older woman wore a dark blue daring off shoulder dress that showed off her skin with the slit reaching her upper thigh. it would be considered scandalous if any other woman were to wear it. the white ruffled sleeves only reaching her elbows complimented the dark glove she wore on her left hand. as always, her wrists were decorated with shining gold bracelets and her signature jade ring that rested on her ungloved finger.

“flattery won’t get you anywhere, child.” taking a goblet from the wandering server, she took a tentative sip before sloshing the drink around. 

aventurine didn’t care for what others thought of him, but it was different when the woman beside him did it. he suddenly felt insecure about the white dress shirt he wore. wondering if it was obvious that the piece of clothing was too big for him with the way it sagged around his shoulders. the black vest that was more akin to a coat with its train felt too suffocating now. he suddenly had the urge to readjust the collar of his shirt and take off the dark blue gem pin on the center of his neck. he didn’t look like the playful and reckless lord aventurine he worked so hard to build up whenever jade was around. and he hated it.

an evil chuckle escaped jade’s lips. “you look better in turquoise, my dear.”

he scoffed, voice laced with the same poison he used to scare off any predators. “this was not my first choice either, madam. if i had known this ball was limited to only whites, golds, and blues then i would’ve brought my own clothing.”

aventurine felt the woman’s lips brush his ear as she whispered. “don’t use that tone with me, child. you still owe me a big debt after saving your little princess.”

jade must have noticed his tense posture when she mentioned you. cursing himself under his breath for showing weakness but he couldn’t calm his beating heart as he looked for you inside the ballroom. the older woman gave aventurine another chuckle before leaning away. the snake-like pupils of her silver eyes made aventurine’s skin crawl but he dared to not look away. narrowing down his own eyes at the woman who had given him everything but took it all away with the snap of a finger.

“will my life suffice then?” aventurine was losing his composure when the woman grinned like a vulture. the room was suddenly stilled and small. all he could see was jade baring her fangs at him like a wild animal on a hunt.

“you’ve already given me your life the first time around,” she moved her gaze away from him and instead looked towards you. aventurine’s fist behind his back shook in anger. “i’m starting to think you have nothing of value to give me anymore.”

he scoffed. slamming the goblet in his hand on the table with a quiet bang. jade let out an amused chuckle. “how peculiar, you’re normally more composed than this. don’t tell me you’ve grown possessive of that little princess?”

“we’re fates, madam. we’re always possessive.” aventurine argued, eyes never leaving your figure as you danced across the ballroom with a familiar man.

“oh but not in the way that you are now,” an arm slithered around his shoulder as a card appeared in front of him. obscuring his vision of you. “quite interesting, wouldn’t you agree. i’ve tried so hard to keep this card up right but it keeps flipping upside down. you know what this means right, kakavasha?”

aventurine swatted the card away from his face. the piece of paper slipping out of jade’s hand. he relished in her momentary shock before slipping away from her hold. he gave the card one more passing glance before sauntering towards the dance floor in search of you.

“you’ve made a fatal mistake, child.” jade warns. “the cornerstones are not to be used for someone that’s easily disposable.”

“[name] is not disposable.” aventurine turned to the woman as she scoffed. “they will be of more value in due time.”

“you say in due time knowing that they won’t last until next month.” the woman shook her head, the same white snake he saw earlier resting on her shoulders. “tell me, kakavasha, are they truly worth all this effort? you, a fate that i raised, risking it all for a mortal that doesn’t even remember you or your sacrifices. they won’t remember you because you no longer have anything of value to give destiny.”

aventurine tried to argue back but he felt winded. that all the oxygen he didn’t need to live were suddenly taken away the more jade continued. “you are nothing of value now. do you think your little [name] would still care if you’re no use to them? give up child, you are no longer obligated to protect them.”

“i’m the only one that can.” he countered.

“with what power?” jade tilted her head to the side. her light lavender hair swaying with her movement. “fate is no longer on your side, nor is luck. you are as powerful as a mortal now.”

aventurine took a moment to reply. “i’ll think of something. i always have.”

the woman laughed. the laugh that rang like sirens inside his mind, telling him to turn away, run away to a place where she wouldn’t find him. but it was hopeless. jade was like a shadow he could never escape from. she will always have a leash around his throat. pulling him back when she deemed necessary and suffocating him from the harsh reality.

“you better have a plan, child.” the same predatory glint came back to her eyes. “i have no use for children who can’t pull their own weight.”

 – –

your conversation with veritas ratio was cut short when an arm wrapped around your waist and tugged you back. a surprised gasp escaped your lips when you saw aventurine look down on you with that same grin on his face. “i did say i’d dance with you, no?”

“i vividly remember you saying that you’d ask me. not steal me away.” he let out a jovial laugh that involuntarily made your cheeks flush like wine. 

you let out a cough behind your fist as aventurine took hold of your hand and twirled you around to face him. his bare hand coming to rest at your hips as the other held your gloved one. despite the layers of your dress and the corset you wore, you felt aventurine’s warmth seep through.

“now where has my little spitfire gone?” you turn to glare at him. “ah! there you are, i was starting to think you've mellowed down with all these mediocre men.”

you rolled your eyes as he pressed your bodies together even more when other dancers graced the floor. “careful there my lord, you almost sound jealous.”

“i’m a fate, sweetheart, i’m always jealous.” you furrow your brows in confusion at the new pet name. aventurine was never short on nicknames – both good and bad– and him using them on you was never strange. but it didn’t quell that curiosity that led you to him when he used a new one.

he only smiled, and but for a fragile moment, under the chandelier lights that bathed him in gold, the same color of his hair that captivated you when you first met, you understood why so many women would die for him. if aventurine wasn’t so pointed with his words, so greedy with his fortunes, you might have been a little bewitched by him.

but you couldn’t help but feel shy under his gaze and touch. in this moment, with his very being pressed so close to your soul, you can’t help but wish that you were the fortune that he was always greedy for. you wanted to delude yourself that with every twirl, every lift, and every dip of this seemingly never ending dance that felt like it was torn off a fairytale, he wanted you to be his fortune too.

“penny for your thoughts, friend?” you felt his finger press and prod at the mark near your pulse point. “it’s quite rude to not look at your dance partner, you know.”

you let out a snort. “you must be quite the rude gentleman. you never once looked at the poor ladies you’ve danced with all night.”

aventurine grinned from ear to ear. “so you were watching me?”

blood rushed to your cheeks as you glared at him. “i was not! i was simply sending silent prayers to the poor girls that would fall for charms.”

“oh so now you think i’m charming,” the playful upswing of his voice and eyes did your hammering heart no good. “don’t look so embarrassed, friend, everyone thinks i’m charming.”

“how dreadful.” you say with a roll of your eyes before a quiet atmosphere laid itself on the both of you. you tried not to pay attention to the way his grip on your hand and hip tightened when the music slowly started to fade away and the other dancers began to dissipate. for another moment, you wished for the dance to never end.

“you look beautiful in turquoise, you should wear it more often.” you snapped out of your daze when aventurine whispered a compliment to your ear. but when you turn to tell him off, he was gone.

there it was again, the bitter feeling welling up inside your chest. the mark on your pulse – a single coin that was slowly fading away, the symbol of your deal almost being over – nearly sent a wave of tears to break out from your eyes. the urgent feeling of you needing to tell him something still weighed at the back of your mind, but you don’t remember what it was that you wished to say to him.

“is something the matter?” a soft voice from behind you spoke.

the man had silver hair and the most beautiful golden eyes you’ve ever seen. a crown lay on his head as a halo was behind him. “prince sunday…” you murmur as the prince smiled.

“that is me, yes,” he offered a gloved hand to you. “would you care to dance? if you aren’t tired, of course.”

your mind was torn. one part of you telling you yes, dance with the prince who had the reputation of never asking any lady to dance. live out your dreams of meeting a prince and falling in love with him. but another part of you told you to chase after aventurine. seek him out like you always do. one last time.

in the end, you took the prince’s hand and danced with him until the night ended.

 – –

aventurine was not jealous.

that’s a lie, he was a fate, he’s always jealous. but not the same jealousy he normally felt when he looked over mortals living out their lives peacefully. that feeling of jealousy was normal for him. this type of jealousy as he watched you dance with the prince felt revolting. like someone had stabbed him in his already hollow chest over and over until he breathed his final breath.

he wanted to steal you away again like how he did when you danced with that vampire scoundrel named ratio. but he couldn’t. aventurine no longer had the right to intervene with your life now that your debt was slowly being paid in full.

fates were dangerous beings of magic. they are all possessive and jealous. mortals pray to him and others but they are no saints nor saviors. aventurine was the rumored fate of luck, madam bonajade’s prized successor. blessing anyone who seeks him out but must pay a hefty toll of something greater than they have received if his tasks and criteria are not met.

aventurine recounts the many scandal sheets that were written about his endeavors, the most famous was titled “A Scandal’s Gambit”. the scandal sheet retold his deal with a poor man wishing to elevate his family’s status from poverty. aventurine gave the man fortune and a simple task: spend the wealth to help his family and to not waste it on useless luxuries. but like the card description from the deck of destiny, the fate of luck’s first task is deceitful and blinded mortals. it wasn’t long before rumors about a mysterious man spending questionable amounts of money

started floating around the city.

people began to point to the man as a thief when a duchess came to him demanding he give back the treasures he stole from her. he quickly went back to aventurine, sitting on a velvet couch and a roulette in front of him. he begged and begged for the fate to help him but he was turned away. aventurine later revealed that his second and final task was to keep his family from dying, but since the man was blinded by greed, his wife and child died from starvation. 

“i simply took back the fortune you stole from me.” was the fate’s famous line. and not long, the man tried to flee but was captured and later died in jail. to pay for his failure, the man’s family was taken from him as punishment and compensation for fate’s lost fortune. but what aventurine didn’t realize was that the man’s child survived, and later came to him.

they asked for the same thing. to elevate their family from poverty, but unlike their father, they succeeded and are now reaping the fruits of their labor.

that was what aventurine wanted to believe as he continued to watch you dance with the prince you’ve always dreamt of marrying. you paid a hefty price for this happily ever after and aventurine was willing to take the fall for you. 

your journey after meeting him was nothing short of a heart attack. every twist and turn had aventurine’s nonexistent heart beating rapidly within the columns of his chest. all the tasks and missions he sent you, the times where you were captured and he had to save. aventurine wanted nothing more than for you to remember that he was your prince, not the man with the halo behind his head.

was it wrong of him to expect some sort of thanks from a person with no memory of him? no recollections of how he carried you through freezing waters, pulled you through hellfire, hauled you from the clutches of war and death. aventurine wanted just one simple thank you for saving you. but he knew it was too much to ask for.

after using the cornerstone of his fellow fates to reverse time after your unfortunate death, he had to painfully relive your first meeting, your trials and adventures, and see you dance with the man you married in your first life.

aventurine no longer had anything valuable to give to destiny so it took your memories instead. he made sure it was your memories and not you entirely. you were the most valuable thing aventurine had, and he’d be damned if you were taken from him too for a second time.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

– my proxy.

pairing: wise x gn!reader

premise: belle is currently suffering from an incurable disease of watching her brother play oblivious to your obvious hints of affection. she only prays that you confess soon or at least realize that wise actually feels the same.

– warnings: none

– author's notes: i am so normal about wise. whenever he starts talking in game i just burst into a fit of giggles. filler post for now. | ~700 words.

wise despite his name, wasn’t all that wise when it comes to noticing the very obvious hints you throw at him (or maybe he does know, he just isn’t speaking up about it). but belle does, and it sends her into a fit of giddy giggles that she hides behind her fist whenever it happens.

a fond and amused glint in her eyes whenever wise gets flustered after you call him “my proxy”. it wasn’t anything out of ordinary, wise always calls himself your proxy anyways, but whenever you do it on missions or when you go to hollows to accompany the cunning hares, it never fails to flush his cheeks a pretty pink. belle would let out a snicker and kick his feet from under the table and she’s always met with a warning glare. not once has he mentioned the romantic undertones of your words despite picking up on it himself. 

or the times when you would always drop by their store to hangout in his room. more often than not, when belle comes to check on you both, you’d be fast asleep on his bed with a bangboo in between you two. a devious smirk would always creep up belle’s face when she tip toes into the room and quietly open the cap of a washable marker to write on both of your faces. wise, when he wakes up, would come running down the stairs to chase belle around for writing “[name]’s proxy” in big bold letters on his cheek while you laugh. never once wiping the words of “wise’s hollow raider” with a heart on the cheek opposite to wise’s. 

belle isn’t ignorant nor is wise, but it does frustrate her when her brother doesn’t speak up about his very obvious feelings about you. a sudden feeling of irritation blooming within her chest when she sees your crestfallen expression when wise keeps calling you “just a friend” when general cop or the tin master ask what your relationship is. belle doesn't miss the flash of slight hurt in your eyes before you mask it with an awkward smile and wave of your hand, agreeing with what wise said even though you obviously want to be something more than just a friend.

she’s frustrated with you too. the hours the two of you spend in their workspace, curled up on the couch as you vent out your frustration at wise’s obliviousness. eight out of ten times, belle would just urge you to confess directly, however, you would always go quiet and murmur into the bangboo in your arms that confessing isn’t an option. at first, belle was rightfully confused. she saw how you looked at wise; you looked at him as if he hung the sun and moon himself. he was your entire world and you had him putty in your hands with just two words. it wasn’t until the day after when belle finally realizes –when nicole has her arms wrapped around your waist and an angry flush on her face when you enter their store battered and bruised, but still smiling– that this was a first for you too. 

before becoming a regular client, you would recklessly jump into hollows without a carrot or a proxy. barely making it out alive if nicole hadn’t found you and made you a member of her little band of misfits. you were enamored with wise when he first patched you up. you didn’t have anyone before him that cared enough to lecture you about danger, your recklessness, and bad habits. he was probably the first person that genuinely showed concern for you so belle understood for a moment why you didn’t want to confess. she’s watched enough romance movies and read books and comics to know that confessing has its risks. your friendship that you painstakingly built with her brother brick by brick would come crumbling down if you said those three words.

“my dearest proxies,” you barreled into their store front with a bright grin. belle doesn’t miss the twinkle in wise’s eyes when he sees you. “let’s go out for lunch. my treat!”

“what’s the occasion?” wise asks, putting down the boxes of videotapes on the counter to give you his undiverted attention.

your grin reached your eyes as you waved a piece of parchment in front of them both. “it’s paycheck day! and what better way than to treat my proxies to lunch for taking such good care of me.”

“count me in!” belle merrily jogs towards you and gives you a high five.

“what do you say wise?” belle flashed her brother with a knowing look. the boy only shook his head and started leading the two of you out the store.

“well, how can i say no to free food?”

wise stole a laugh from your lungs as you tangled your arms with them both. “that’s my proxy. now let’s go!”

belle never misses the way wise’s cheeks flush whenever you intertwine your arms together; it was as easy as breathing for you. she just hopes that one day you’ll see for yourself that wise also feels the same, he’s just clueless and a little shy to show it unlike you.

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

– jealous charms.

pairing: wise x gn!reader

premise: when jealous, wise had an interesting habit of trying to outdo whoever caught your attention. he needn't worry though, he'll still be your favorite forever.

– warnings: none

– author's note: another filler fic until i finish that one sunday fic that i've been marinating for 2 days now. | ~1.7k words.

“master, is it safe to conclude that you’re jealous of miss grace howards from belobog industries? you’ve been awfully engrossed in trying to replicate her creation for [name].”

a loud clatter echoed in the room as the pair of pliers in wise’s hand suddenly dropped to his work table. your head darts to wise’s hunched figure. his back was awfully straight and shoulders tensed as you raised an amused brow at him when he stood up from his seat and marched his way to fairy. muttering quiet curses as the bangboo on your lap tilted its head at him.

“is that why you’ve been glaring at her whenever we visit the construction site?” you questioned with a teasing tone. wise swiveled his head to your direction and narrowed his gentle eyes at you but you only let out an amused snort. he looked more like a wet cat than a big shot proxy with the way his cheeks burned red all the way to the tips of his ears. the color could probably rival the red tassel earring you gave him last year on chinese new years.

“firstly, i am not jealous–”

“i would beg to differ, master.”

“second!” wise turned to fairy, a hand to his hip while the other ran down his face, voice raising slightly as he tried to rid off the flustered tint on his cheeks. “if i were to be jealous of someone, it wouldn’t be grace.”

“will mister anton from belobog industries be the next candidate?” the ai quipped at him making the gray haired boy groan in frustration.

a laugh rippled from your chest as wise pouted and begrudgingly went back to his work station. but not before narrowing his eyes one last time at a glowing blue eyeball (?) that was fairy.

“aww wise it’s okay,” you gently place the bangboo down on the floor and make your way to wise. trying your hardest to take a peek at whatever he’s been working on. or at least get confirmation that he was actually making what you thought he was making. “everyone gets jealous sometimes.”

wise didn’t appreciate your teasing remark because he rolled his eyes at you and threw a piece of paper at your face. “seeing as though you’re not doing anything, do me a favor and pick up some more films for the store.”

it was your turn to pout. “jealousy doesn’t suit you at all, wise.”

with a sigh, you reluctantly left the room when he raised a brow at you with a smirk tugging at his lips. you hated how such a small quirk up of his lips melted all of your teasing. but then again, when it comes to anything related to wise you didn’t put up too much of a fight, no matter what it was.

– –

wise was not jealous. he repeatedly reminded himself of those words like a broken record. reciting it like a mantra in his head as he continued to bend and break the pieces of metal in front of him.

“master, now that the subject of your affection is gone, will you finally admit to being jealous?”

fairy’s words sent a shiver down his spine, silently thanking belle and you for going out to the arcade and prolonging your inevitable return even more. if either one of you heard fairy, he wouldn’t be able to live it down. a defeated sigh left his lips when he dropped his tools and buried his head in his arms.

“fairy, please just shut up.” wise’s voice was no more than a muffled plea as fairy continued to torment him.

“but all the data i’ve collected all share the same conclusion: you are jealous master.”

wise turned his head to their hdd system that glowed blue as fairy’s avatar floated. “okay so maybe i am a little jealous.” 

“but why, master?” wise felt an oncoming headache approach as fairy listed out the reason why he shouldn’t be jealous. “hollow raider [name] has made it clear on many occasions that they favor you the most. their sudden interest in miss grace howards cannot compare to their interest in you.”

wise knew that but it still didn’t feel right to him. with a groan he dropped his head back on the desk, his free hand coming to inspect the silver band he’s been working on for the past few weeks. “you’re making me feel stupid here, fairy.” an uncharacteristic pout graced his lips when he remembered how your eyes shined like bright diamonds when grace showed you her newest invention.

“it’ll help you in the hollows!” she had proudly proclaimed. and ever since that day, you’ve been wearing the bracelet that doubled as a tracker for both your health and your position to every mission you took on. wise felt the pricks of jealousy whenever you praised the older woman with a dazzling grin and an excited “it was very helpful!”

“i’m also helpful.” he muttered to no one in particular. 

“of course you are! you’re my proxy after all.”

wise felt his heart lurch out his chest as he hurried hid the band inside his hand when you appeared in the room. like a deer caught in headlights, he stiffly smiled at you. “w-when did you get back…?” he cooly asked, or at least he hoped it sounded cool enough for you to brush off whatever you heard.

with your hands behind your back, you stalked your way to his desk. “just a moment ago. belle is shelving all the new films now.” you lean in closer to wise’s space, trying for the second time to catch a glimpse at whatever it was he was working on. a tentative smile forming on your face when you ask him, “will you finally show me what you’re making? i won’t laugh, i promise.”

you certainly wouldn’t laugh, but you would tease him relentlessly. a final sigh escaped him as he leaned back on his seat and opened up the hand that hid his creation. “it’s… really nothing.” his voice was unusually timid when you walked over to his desk and took a peak. being in such close proximity with you has his poor heart and mind swimming. you wore perfume today and it was all wise could think about as you gingerly pick up the silver band.

“you need to give yourself more credit, wise.” 

this wasn’t good. if you continued to look at him like that he would surely melt into a puddle, and that would be incredibly embarrassing. a smile broke out from your face as you unclipped grace’s wristband and put wise’s creation on your wrist.

“does it have any functions?” wise has always enjoyed your curious nature. sure, it got you in trouble most of the time, but he found it incredibly endearing. he shook his head and opened up the closest drawer and pulled out a matching band several sizes smaller. “not any advanced ones, not yet at least.”

wise stood up from his seat and picked up the bangboo peacefully dozing off in one of the corners. taking its small arm gently, he slid the band over and glowed a soft white. the same thing happened to the one you wore and wise swore he felt his heart skip a few beats when you looked at him with big eyes filled with wonder.

“but it can accurately track your ether aptitude and send me an emergency message when you’re reaching your limit,” picking up the bangboo in his arms, wise made his way back to his desk and placed the little creature on it. “it’s still a work in progress, but i hope it’ll eventually be able to map out full hollows without much trouble.” 

your silence made wise nervous. you were never this quiet and he didn’t dare to look at you. that is until he felt a pair of arms wrap around his head and the scent of your perfume invading his senses. his breath started to quicken as you nuzzled your face into his hair, hands resting on his shoulders. wise felt his entire body tingle when your chuckle vibrated through his entire body and left a fuzzy feeling in his chest, a swarm of freed butterflies fluttering inside his stomach when you pulled away. warm hands holding both of his cheeks that were no doubt burning a bright red.

“did you make this for me?” wise didn’t like the way your eyes crinkled into amused crescents. “or did you just want to outstage miss grace?” he heard your laugh ring out when he turned his head to the side and murmured a soft maybe into your palm.

“god you’re so cute you know that?” a wide smile spread across your face as you smothered the boy into another hug. “don’t worry, no one could ever replace my proxy.”

wise wasn’t a physically affectionate person, not by a lot at least. but right now when he feels your laughter so close to his heart, he can’t help but wish to stay in your embrace. his arms slowly snaked to wrap around your waist and pull you closer, wanting to hug you like how your skin hugs the bones that make up your entirety. how lovely it must be to live inside your heart, to feel every beat pulsing through him as he listens to your heartbeat. slightly erratic but still calm, so unlike his that was beating so rapidly he feared it might escape his ribs and offer itself to you. 

“maybe i was a little jealous.” he didn’t know what urged him to say that but the laughter it stole from you made him smile like a fool. wise would stay jealous forever if you would hug him like this every time to assure him that he was still your favorite form of protection.

“thank you for always caring about me, wise.” there was such vulnerability in your voice that made wise tremble in your hold. all he could offer was a hum as he buried his head further into your chest making you chuckle. if only you knew the lengths he would go to just to keep you glued to his side, away from all harm and danger.

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

– love’s thesis.

pairing: alhaitham x gn!reader

premise: the most logical thing to do when you find out your pretend lover is actually your soulmate? conduct a research and fall in love in the process.

– warnings: inaccurate/unrealistic depictions of college, modern au.

– author's note: i write one long fic for alhaitham and suddenly that old project i have for him back in april is suddenly back. | ~5.9k words.

to say that alhaitham was royally fucked would be an understatement. he was behind three lectures, had a major paper he’s yet to touch, and now, with the sudden appearance of his soulmate mark, he wasn’t sure what to tackle first.

alhaitham let out a long exasperated sigh, hand coming to drag down his already tired face as he irritatedly tapped on his table. the white screen of his laptop blinded him as the clock ticked, a constant reminder that he was losing time if he didn’t type out at least a sentence to his professor–or to you. a low grumble left his lips when he closed his device and left his room to get another cup of coffee. mind swimming with how he was going to approach you, or if he was even going to say the implications of having your name written on his forearm.

when he reached the living space of his apartment, there you were, in the same position and predicament as him. you looked up from your books and gave him a weary and crooked smile. eyes sunken and hair a mess but all alhaitham could see was how the lamp light on the coffee table illuminated your features. the pounding of his heart was back and all he could offer you was nod before going to the kitchen. this was stupid, he reminded himself. how could the person he’s been fake dating for sheer convenience be his actual soulmate. you, who dreams of fairytales and happily ever after, his soulmate? alhaitham scoffed in disbelief as he waited for the coffee machine to finish his drink.

his mind was torn; alhaitham’s rationality screaming at him to just be honest and tell you now but the more curious side of him wanted to test out this soulmate thing. from the corner of his eye, he sees you stretch your arms over your head and let out a tired sigh. books and papers and devices scattered on his floor as you push your hair out of your face. up until a few hours ago, you were nothing more than a footnote in his life, but now as his eyes took another glimpse over the inking of your name, alhaitham begins to wonder if offering to be your fake boyfriend was also part of fate’s plans.

just then, when the coffee machine finished his drink, an idea popped into his mind. something that would quench his curiosity over the idea of soulmates and finish this thesis he’s yet to even start on. and it would only take 4 steps.

--

STEP 1: THE PROPOSAL

this was abnormal behavior for alhaitham. he has never felt so nervous and antsy in his life until now. alhaitham never felt his palms sweat when the panelists grilled him during his presentations or when he nearly fucked up a speech because he had 2 hours of sleep prior. he concluded that it must be the left over adrenaline from stealing kaveh’s concealer to hide your name on his forearm.

he wasn’t ashamed to have you as his soulmate, it was quite opposite now that he thinks about it. you were a proud scholar like him. the only difference was you were in vahamuna and him in harvatat. but that didn’t deter you from engaging in academic banter and debates with him. alhaitham just felt a bit unsure how to approach the topic of soulmates with you, especially when he was the first one to lay down the boundary that everything is purely for convenience and that no feelings should be involved.

“i’m very confused,” your voice cuts through his inner dilemma as you skim over his proposal paper. “is it really okay for me to assist you in this research? wouldn’t faruzan or maybe someone in harvatat be of more help?”

“my topic delves into relationships. seeing as though you are my lover,” alhaitham pauses and he didn’t fail to pick up on the blood rushing to your cheeks when he called you his lover. “you’re my best option.”

there was an amused glint in your eyes when you shook your head. you slowly packed your things and handed his proposal back to him. “this is giving me major deja vu.” the grin on your lips and playful tone also took him to memory lane when he first proposed to this fake date situation.

“i’m assuming this is a yes?” he raised a curious brow at you. the two of you falling into each other’s pace as you left the library.

“it’s a yes.” 

STEP 1: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2: RESEARCH AND ON FIELD EXPERIMENTS.

once his paper was given the green light, he offered to start when you reached his apartment. having nothing to do, until your groupmates replied to you at least, you entered his space and sat yourself on the floor. opening your laptop while alhaitham went to the kitchen to get you something to drink and munch on, you can’t help but feel so at home. alhaitham notices this every time so he makes a mental note of your behavior for later use.

hours passed and after many coffee drinks, wingstop takeouts, 10 minute power naps, an unintended pillow fight, and blasting random songs to keep you both awake and sanity intact, you and alhaitham decided on a few experiments to conduct on his research.

STEP 2: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2.1: EMOTIONAL SYNCHRONY UNDER EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCES.

“alhaitham, where did you get that…?”

the gray haired man looked up from his tablet and nodded towards your direction. his eyes glancing over to the heart monitors that were now present in his living room. “the local hospital.”

“you really are full of surprises,” you let out an amused chuckle. dropping your stuff beside the coffee table and sitting next to him, he hands you the many wires of the heart monitor. “how did you even get these to your apartment.”

he got up from his seat and crouched to the level of his tv, not answering your question. sorting through the many movie discs he had rented out for the both of you to watch and test the level of emotional synchrony. “what would you like to watch first?”

alhaitham had never whipped his head back faster in his life when he caught you raising your shirt. showing off your midriff as you attach the wires to your chest. he felt his temperature rise as you answered a simple anything to his question. this was ridiculous, his mind echoed, he’s seen you in a bathing suit when you and his friends went to the beach. alhaitham didn’t understand why he felt so flustered. shoving a random cd into the cd player and taking the remote, he sat back down on the couch. he just prayed that you don’t question the sudden flush on his cheeks.

one horror movie, three romcoms, one tragedy, and one thriller later, you both decided to take a break.

“any progress so far?” you ask with a tilt of your head. 

he hummed in response. “remarkable to say the least.”

alhaitham hands over the tablet to you while he detaches himself from the heart monitor. he made his way to the kitchen and took out two cups from his cupboard. “the study we found last time stated that close companions tend to copy the other’s emotional response under emotional stress.”

“and?” you take the cup he offered gingerly and took a sip. it was coffee, made just how you like it. “how did we do?”

he took a sip of his own and took the tablet back.

“almost perfectly in sync. fascinating isn’t it?”

he tried his best to not show any signs of whatever he was feeling. as remarkable this was, it was a bit scary. and alhaitham didn’t know what to make out of it. he knows that not all soulmates end up together, in fact, a study that was conducted five years ago proved that only a small margin of soulmates live long enough to meet their other half. and an even smaller margin of soulmates actually worked out. it was only the first experiment, the first trial, but alhaitham could feel the arms of inevitability and uncertainty wrap around his ribs and start breaking each bone one by one. 

just by this one experiment alone, when he offered you a tissue to wipe your tears or when you leaned on him for support because of your laughter, alhaitham felt the inevitable pull towards you. 

STEP 2.1: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2.2: COMMUNICATION AND INTIMACY EXPERIMENT.

it was a busy day at lambad’s cafe. the establishment was housing many students who were all running on little to no sleep and coffee pumping in their veins. project month was proving to be hell on earth for the students. final research defenses and projects were usually held in this time and sometimes the following week would be their finals. it’s a brutal battle against time and insanity, those who don’t have proper time management are almost guaranteed to repeat the year if they receive a single mark that’s below the passing grade.

“geez, busy as always.” you said, scrolling through your phone. 

“i’d be more surprised if no one was busy,” he replied. “kaveh is practically living in his lecture hall.”

you let out a laugh as you put down your phone on the table, face down, as you take a bite off of your snack. “okay, my turn to ask a question.”

“shoot.”

this was today’s experiment. communication and intimacy by using the famous “36 questions to fall in love” as your starting point. in every relationship, not just soulmates, communication needs to be present or else it’ll fall apart sooner or later. conversation let’s people see parts of another they tend to hide. alhaitham wanted to scratch this experiment from the process, but after the last one, he wanted to try if there were any unpredicted outcomes.

many studies have already been conducted on this, alhaitham shouldn’t have a problem finding a supporting article for his thesis. but after just a few questions, he began to think of this experiment as an excuse to get to know you more. he’s not sure if it’s the soulmate thing playing at his mind to get to know you but he suddenly had the urge to absorb every information about you like a sponge. a painful want to know you inside and out; a need to be able to completely explain you to someone else.

“question 27: if you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.”

alhaitham mulled over the question before giving his answer.

“my indifference and wanting to keep most things private does not equate to me not caring about them.” he let his tongue roll over his lips, suddenly feeling parched with the way you were staring at him. “i have high walls, but that doesn’t mean they’re there to ward everyone off. i’m very particular with who i let in, so if they truly want to be my friend, i’d advise them to try until i welcome them in.”

a smile tugged at your lips and alhaitham felt he could finally breathe. “your turn.”

“question 33: if you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? why haven’t you told them yet?”

you let out a hum and leaned back in your seat. “never telling the people i care about that i love them.”

“why haven’t you told them yet?” he asks, crossing both his arms over the table and slightly leaning forward. 

“i don’t know…” you say honestly. a foggy look in your eyes as you stare at the ceiling. “maybe i’m scared it won't sound genuine enough.”

alhaitham wanted to argue that everyone you care about knew that you love them dearly. he was one of those people after all. whatever label you have now was certainly fake, but the vulnerability and care you had for each other wasn’t, and he would die on that hill. 

“well you shouldn’t,” his voice cut through the quiet atmosphere. he hoped that it didn’t sound too harsh. “if they cared about you, they would know whether you're being genuine or not.”

if someone told alhaitham’s younger self that the walls he’d built up would crumble in just 36 questions, he wouldn’t have believed it. he still finds it hard to believe when you both exit the cafe and go your separate ways. but all he can do is accept it. through those questions, he learned more about you–your dreams, values, cherished memories, and vulnerabilities you shared with him first.

ahaitham concluded that this experiment was worth keeping. he felt more connected to you than ever.

STEP 2.2: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2.3: RESEARCH SYMPOSIUM.

admittedly, this wasn’t in the original list of experiments you and alhaitham had planned but decided to go along with it. the akademiya regularly held a research symposium and had one or two students present preliminary research to batches of students. this year, he was asked to do it and he dragged you to be his partner because who else would he ask. certainly not kaveh.

“do your best! i’ll be backstage if you need anything.” he simply nods at your support and walks to the stage. before beginning, he takes one last glance at you. he didn’t know what urged him to do it, but after seeing you flash him a thumbs up and an encouraging grin, he let a small smile loose before looking towards the batch of students that won’t give a single shit about what he’s saying.

roughly 45 minutes later, alhaitham stepped down the podium and bowed. applause echoed throughout the hall as he made his way backstage to find you. the next batch would be listening to you after all. he stopped in his tracks when he saw you happily chatting with a student he didn't recognize. 

“you’re presentation is next, do your best!” he excitedly said. alhaitham narrowed his eyes when the unfamiliar boy rubbed the back of his nape, a flushed tint reaching his cheeks. “maybe after the day’s over we can go get some coffee?”

how strange it was. ever since your name appeared on his forearm he’d started feeling so many new emotions that he normally wouldn’t imagine feeling. it was an ugly feeling, he concluded. alhaitham didn’t like how relieved he felt when you declined the boy’s invitation and when you caught sight of him, he felt his heart beat rapidly in his ears when you skipped over to him. he already knew why he felt a sudden surge of pride take over him when you drag him further back stage to review your presentation, completely ignoring the other boy. 

it was for research, so why did his arm wrap loosely around your waist like second nature?

STEP 2.3: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2.4: CREATIVE AND ARTISTIC COLLABORATION.

you were the one who coined this idea after a quick chat with kaveh. for once, the blonde man had an insightful opinion and offered to schedule you and alhaitham to a quick session of painting on your next day offs. now here were the three of you, inside a painting studio with other students in the art department of the akademiya, seated in front of a white canvas and a tray of colors.

from the corner of his eyes, alhaitham took notice of how you and kaveh animatedly chatted. the same ugly feeling he felt that day backstage came back in full throttle. clicking his tongue, he shifted his focus back on the instructor’s voice and followed his instructions. every once in a while, he would take a peek at you and feel something bloom inside his chest when caught a glimpse of that determined look on your face. by the time he looked back at his canvas, he felt the wind inside his lungs be stolen away when he realized he used your colors to paint. 

different shades and strokes of your favorite colors invaded his senses. his own mind playing tricks on him because he could’ve sworn you were peering over his shoulders, hands wrapped around his waist and your chin comfortably set on one of his shoulders. alhaitham felt the ghosts of your warmth and couldn’t help but crave it.

he snapped out of his daydreams when the instructor’s assistant approached him. she was the same age as you and with just one look, alhaitham concluded that she was interested in him. it took all of his will power to not roll his eyes when she complimented his work and not subtly ask for his number. thankfully, she was called back to the instructor’s side. he felt a shiver run down his spine when the girl looked over her shoulders and winked at him. he was most definitely not coming back here ever again.

when the class finished, alhaitham had successfully painted 3 canvases, all with your favorite colors and things that reminded him of you. a successful experiment if he does say so himself. 

meeting up with kaveh near the exit they both engaged in small chatter. the blonde architect complaining about how he’s burning through his concealer faster than he expected because of the lack of sleep. alhaitham made sure to just hum and nod here and there to not give himself away that he was the reason why kaveh’s makeup was running out. 

“i swear! this school wants its students six feet under before they graduate.”

he tunes out the complaints of his senior and mindlessly scrolls through his phone. tapping his foot impatiently when the assistant from earlier started making her way over to him. scoffing in annoyance he was about to drag kaveh out the door and wait for you outside but an arm tangled with his and started tugging him.

“good job today!” you grin at alhaitham with both your arms interlaced with the other. 

taking a peek over his shoulder, alhaitham caught sight of the assistant girl scoffing and rolling her eyes. he shifted his focus back on you, eyes meeting anyone and anything but his. an amused smirk was present on his face when he felt your hand tighten its hold around his bicep. 

“jealous?” he teases.

you roll your eyes and grip his arm tighter. “maybe.”

STEP 2.4: COMPLETE.

--

STEP 2.5: COOKING.

the constant ticking of the clock and the tic tac of keyboards was all alhaitham could hear. it was almost midnight and the two of you had decided to pull another all nighter together. at this point, the two of you had been working on his thesis for almost a month now, and alhaitham is still yet to come to a conclusion.

he definitely feels something for you. but there was an uncertain part of him that wonders if his feelings are truly genuine or if the idea of being soulmates was hindering his unbiased thinking. you look up from your laptop when you hear him stop typing and softly ask him if he’s alright. alhaitham wanted to answer no, he was not in the slightest bit alright. but he needn’t open his mouth to reply because you already stood up and invited him to the kitchen.

“let’s cook something to eat. we’ve been ordering too much takeout lately.” there was a sheepish grin on your lips as you opened his fridge and took out some ingredients. “what do you say?”

alhaitham didn’t really have a choice when you’re already started preparing. and even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t be able to say no. when it came to you, he always found it hard to decline your invitations and advances. so now here he was, helping you cook buttered noodles at 11:57 p.m. with your playlist softly playing in the background.

he’s read a study about how cooking tends to deepen relationships between people. alhaitham wonders if this will also happen with what you and him have now. he didn’t really have think too much of it because once he hears you hiss from accidentally touching the pot with boiling water, he’s already by your side. a gentle hand guiding yours under the faucet running with cold water as he lectures you about being careful. you only laugh and say he’s worrying too much. patting him on the arm, a silent message to release your hand, alhaitham lets you continue your duty of cooking the pasta as he grates the cheese and prepares plates.

something about this fragile moment has alhaitham’s mind swimming with possibilities for the future. all he could think about is how nice it would to come home to you after a long day of work (he already does this, he just won’t admit it). crashing into your arms without care as he prattles about his day, his head on your chest while your hand gently strokes over his hair. listening intently to whatever he had to say because you loved listening to his voice.

“haitham can you help me drain the water?” before you could even turn around to face him, he's already behind you. his larger hands held your smaller ones and helped you guide the pot to the sink. alhaitham doesn’t miss the burning of your ears and he’s overcome with the urge to tease.

“why so quiet?” he asks with a playful lilt to his voice. “are you that tired?”

he hears you scoff and grumble. that fuzzy feeling swimming inside his chest again as you duck under his arms and sit yourself on his dining table. he raises a brow at you but you only raise the hand that touched the boiling pot. 

“my hand is hurting again?”

“are you serious?”

“deadly serious.”

alhaitham knew you were horsing around but he only chuckled with a shake of his head. in the end, by the time it reached 12:12, the two of you were eating happily. no small talk or conversation was present but neither of you minded. all you cared about was being in his presence and alhaitham would give it to you even if you hadn’t asked for it. he looks up from his plate when he hears you chuckle and sees you tiredly swirling the food on your fork. 

“we’re not getting any sleep tonight aren’t we?” there was something dreamy about the way you looked right now. evidently tired, hair a mess and flying in any and every direction, and your eyes were droopy. you looked so at home -at peace- and alhaitham wonders if it’s because you two were spending time together.

“you ask that as if it’s the first time we’ve done this.” you laugh at his reply and look at him. a certain emotion in them that he can only recognize as fondness.

alhaitham concludes from this unscripted experiment that he wouldn’t mind cooking with you every night.

STEP 2.5: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 2.6: VULNERABILITY AND TRUST.

today marked the last week and final experiment of alhaitham’s thesis. the both of you decided to leave the “scariest” experiment for last so you wouldn’t feel too uncomfortable. after all, being blindfolded and led to some unknown place wasn’t something normal couples would do on a daily basis. yet here you were, trusting him completely with your safety as he holds your hand leading you somewhere.

“you doing okay there, haitham?”

this was dangerous. alhaitham shouldn’t be walking backwards. but he couldn’t snuff out his desire of seeing you under the setting sun. he could bump into something and fall, compromising this experiment, but just this once, alhaitham let himself cheat. disobey his own rules. he’s already broken multiple ones so what’s one more?

“i should be asking you that,” he pauses when he hears you chuckle. “i’m not the one blindfolded here.”

“aww don’t worry haitham. i trust you won’t kill me.”

“you don’t know that.”

“do you even know how to hide a body?” alhaitham was about to reply when you cut him off. “nevermind you probably do.”

alhaitham didn’t bother to stifle a laugh at your sudden confession. and you laugh with him. when his back bumps into a metal pole, he takes it as a sign to finally turn around and walk the correct way. it hasn’t been a minute yet he’s already missing the sight of your smiling face.

“tell me a secret, haitham.”

“why?”

“this is a vulnerability and trust experiment. tell me something you haven’t told anyone.”

he takes a minute to reply. after much contemplation, alhaitham thinks it’s time to tell you.

“i’m scared of my soulmate.”

“why are you scared?” your voice turned quiet. it sounded more like an inaudible murmur.

“you already know i’m not one for relationships,” he hears you hum. “but recently their name appeared on my forearm. it was unexpected, in fact, i didn’t even think it was possible.”

“why would you think that?” you sound almost hurt. alhaitham didn’t like it.

“soulmates are too unreliable. you’ve certainly seen the multiple studies on them right? most soulmates don’t even get the chance to meet their other half.”

“and yet here we are,” he chuckled and intertwined your fingers. “doing a study on soulmates and testing the potential emotional synergy they might have.”

“i have a strict framework for my life. i built it with facts and logic. soulmates simply don’t fit into that framework. the idea of someone having such a profound impact on my life, someone i didn’t choose– it feels like i’m losing a battle against fate.”

“you can’t fight fate, haitham.”

“and who said i was fighting it?”

alhaitham sighs, running a hand through his hair. “i’m scared that they’ll grow tired of this logical thinking of mine. what if they no longer want to understand me? what if we mix like oil and water?”

“you’ll never know unless you try,” you squeeze his hand in reassurance. “sometimes, you need a little unpredictability in your life. so what if they don’t understand you immediately, most soulmates don’t even get together when they first meet. relationships take time and effort.”

alhaitham turns to look at you again, studying your expression. there’s softness in his eyes, he can just tell. “what about you? what are you afraid of?”

you stop walking entirely but not once did your hand slip away from his. “i’ve been afraid of soulmates too. what if my soulmate isn’t a good person? what would happen to my dreams of getting married and that happily ever after?”

alhaitham feels his heart beating inside his ears when you tug off the blindfold. when you meet his eyes with such a lovesick expression, he feels weak in the knees and throat drying up faster than the sands in the desert.

“but what if your soulmate is better than you imagined?” there was a smirk on his lips when he takes a step forward. “what if he’s standing right in front of you as we speak, telling you that he’s willing to give the happily ever after you’ve always wanted? all you needed to do was wait a bit longer.”

you let out a laugh and tug him closer. chest to chest, hand still holding each other. “do you think so?”

“i know so.”

“will he finally tell me what he’s planning with these experiments?” you lean forward and alhaitham feels his heart lurch forward. 

he presses your foreheads together. closing his eyes to stop himself from laughing at the sight of you on your toes to reach him. “i can’t say. it’s hard to put into words.”

you pout and hit him on the chest. “and why not?”

“i’ve never felt such deep affection for someone until you.”

STEP 2.6: COMPLETED.

--

STEP 3: WRITING.

it took a shit ton of self control to stay away from you after his confession. he locked himself in his apartment, leaving you and kaveh to sleepover at tighnari’s since he wouldn’t the door for anyone (this is a lie, he always opens the door for you when you bring him food).

now he’s around 75% done with his paper, and it’s taking longer than expected. his idea of locking his phone in the closet on do not disturb was going well. 

the days continued to drag on and alhaitham scowled at himself for feeling so much yearning for a person he’s going to see tonight or in the following week. he missed the sound of your laughter and comforting presence as you both chased deadlines. but he was determined to finish this thesis tonight or tomorrow afternoon if he accidentally fell asleep. 

as he expected, there was a knock on his front door. he frowned at how quickly he stood up. with a sigh, he went to the door and leaned on one of the walls with both his hands crossed over his chest. 

“haitham, i know you’re in there!” you shout, voice muffled by the door. “you can’t keep hiding there forever! that’s kaveh’s job.”

alhaitham let out a snort as his hand hovered over the doorknob. “i’m working.”

“then work with me. i bought us takeout,” you said, tone teasing. “and i’m not leaving until you open the door.”

with a sigh he relented. knowing deep down that you were deadly serious and he didn’t want to be the cause for a potential cold. when he unlocked the door there you were, your tote bag hanging on your shoulder while your arms held plastic bags of food. the mere sight of you has his mood brightening but he tried his best to keep it neutral.

“it’s late.” he said, trying to sound stern but failing miserably when you wrap a single arm on his waist.

“and yet here i am,” you didn’t even wait for him to tell you to come in. you’re already dropping your things on his couch and sitting down on the floor. “you’re place is a mess.”

he rolls his eyes and sat next to you. “thank you, i’m trying to copy kaveh’s workspace.”

a laugh rippled through the space as you handed him his portion. “don’t be mean to him! he’s trying his best.”

you let alhaitham take a few bites before you leaned your head on his shoulder. eyes soft when you smile at him. “i missed you.”

“i missed you too,” he admits, wrapping one arm around your waist and pulling you impossibly closer. “but i need to finish the paper.”

“oh fuck you!”

you scowl at him and let out an annoyed huff as you take a bite of your own food. you don’t get to savor it when a firm hand takes hold of your chin and pulls your face to alhaitham’s. your lips meet briefly before he’s nestling back on his seat. a cheeky grin on his face when you feel your cheeks burning.

“forgive me?”

STEP 3: (KINDA) COMPLETED.

--

STEP 4: CONCLUSION.

alhaitham let out a sigh of relief as he left the presentation room, loosening his too-tight tie. the sun was high, indicating that it was around afternoon now. the defense took longer than expected due to the panelists’ questions, and the knowing looks of headmaster nahida and rukkhadevata. he shivered when he recalled how he barely escaped miss nahida’s clutches.

he speedwalked down the corridors of the akademiya, keeping a firm grip of the extra copy of his thesis. those countless hours spent trying to perfect it was finally over and it proved to be worth all the effort. he had no doubts in his mind that he got a good mark. but now, he had one final thing he needed to do.

a warm breeze greeted him when he stepped outside. he closed his eyes for a moment, letting the warm afternoon sun ease his nerves already knowing where to go next. he needed to find you.

and find you he did. the moment he opened lambad’s cafe doors, his eyes by habit, searched for you in your usual seat by the window. half of your face hidden by your laptop screen and a coffee cup in your hand. the sight brought a smile to his lips, and for a moment, he didn’t move and let the scene in front of him be printed into his mind.

taking a deep breath, he walked over to you. “mind if i join you?”

you looked up, not surprised but still happy to see him. “how did it go?”

“well,” he said, sitting down across from you. “a lot more intense than i thought, but i did alright.”

“alright seems like an understatement,” you say in amusement, closing your laptop as your eyes flicked over to the papers he held.

alhaitham was struck with the feeling of deja vu. this scene in front of him mirrored the time where he first proposed the idea of partnering up for his thesis. now, here you both were, sitting across from each other with his finished thesis.

you raised a knowing brow at him. “what’s this?”

“the final version of my thesis,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. “i wanted you to have look.”

“i’m honored.” you say with a big smile.

he nodded and took a deep breath. “there’s something i’ve been meaning to tell you.”

you hum to signal him to continue as you flip through the papers and skim over his hard work.

“during my presentation, i talked a lot about the impact of relationships. how it affects someone’s behavior, both consciously and subconsciously. i talked about you.”

you suddenly look up, eyes wide. “what did you say?”

“that emotional synergy doesn’t only apply to soulmates. it’s for everyone. even before your name appeared on my forearm, you and i already shared a connection that felt deeper than most soulmates had. from pretend to the profound truth; you’re my soulmate.”

you blinked at him, trying to process everything he’s said. “you really talked me?”

alhaitham nods, a small smile on his lips when he leans over and flips you to where his experiments come into play. “i did. i talked about our relationship, even when it started as pretend and for convenience, had impacted my life significantly. how i always seem more relaxed and focused when you’re by my side. i couldn’t imagine my life without having you in it the more time we spent together.”

he paused, taking another deep breath. “when i first saw your name on my forearm, i couldn’t believe it. it complicated things severely. but the truth is, you’ve always been my soulmate, even before the mark appeared.”

you take his hand in your and intertwine your fingers. and alhaitham couldn’t help but feel his heart quicken when he sees his name written on your wrist. “you scared me for a while, you know?”

he leaned forward, cupping your face in his free hand. “you don’t have to feel scared anymore. it’s real, even without the marks, it’s always been real. i want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

you let out a shaky breath and smile. “i love you.”

“i love you too,” he murmured, thumbs brushing against your tears to wipe away the stray tears that fell. “more than words can express. i have never known anything else but loving you.”

STEP 4: COMPLETED.

--

BONUS:

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

– rainswept sins, you're forgiven.

pairing: sunday x gn!reader

premise: in the presence of the harsh downpour of rain, you and sunday let it was away your past sins and learn how to finally forgive.

– warnings: slight angst if you squint.

– author's note: me when i get motivated to write when tiktok shows me random poetry and they remind me of sunday <3. if any of the hunters sees this, yes the title is intentional LMAOO. art credits to @.helen_zzhao. | 2.4k words.

what a dull day today was your first thought. here you were, stranded on the planet of mendasia after a mission, clutching your bag filled with exotic flower. the downpour of the rain was unrelenting as you heaved out a sigh. you’ve already sent a message in your group chat for someone to come pick you up after not heeding kafka’s warnings. even under the rain, the wasteland that was once graced by idrila, looked beautiful. still carrying that paradise people sang about in ballads. 

the sight reminded you of that fateful day of your aeon’s final departure.

you were taken back to the days where everything was simple. how you longed to watch the stars pass you by in a blur while adventuring. the golden ticket hidden in your breast pocket suddenly felt heavier than it should have. it was always like this; remembering was painful but you couldn’t bring yourself to forget.

“you’ll catch a cold, mx. [name].” the rain over your head ceased as the figure of a certain halovian came into view. he still had a soft smile on his face when the raindrops soaked his hair and wings. he looked more like a wet cat than an angel sent from above. speaking of wings, when you look up, a surge of pride washed over your heart when you saw his wings in their full glory.

“they’re beautiful…” you reply in a whisper. hand coming to smooth out the feathers and gliding over the golden exoskeleton you created after your last mission in the capital of passion. you don’t miss the slight shudder that went through him when your hand touched his feathers. “have they been serving you well?”

sunday stands beside you, shielding you away from the rain. his gloved hand tugging at your sleeve, pulling you closer to his side. “they have, thank you for creating them.”

you hum in response. pushing away your drenched hair, you soak in his new clothes. he still wore a black shirt with the same gold engravings of the order that’s layered with a white coat and a black corset hugging his abdomen with matching white pants and his usual shoes. when you peer over his shoulder you take notice of the small cape in dark blue. sunday cleared his throat after noticing your staring.

“miss kafka had them tailored for me,” he said, voice laced with shyness. “do they look strange?”

“you look beautiful in white.”

shocked and unprepared for your straightforwardness, sunday couldn’t help the flush that creeped up his cheeks and ears. wings flapping slightly in secret delight as he looked forward. a curled gloved hand hiding half of his face when he muttered a soft thank you. 

maybe your nostalgia was fueling your bravery. you weren’t this blunt and forward with your compliments to sunday’s beauty, but today you let yourself heave out a sigh in contentment. sunday was always a sight to behold, premium eye candy if you will. you stopped eyeing the man when your conversation with elio replayed in your mind.

“you cannot favor him over the rest, [name].” destiny’s slave said as he sat down behind his desk. 

“i’m not favoring him.” you weakly argued, taking the seat across from him. you had always teased his appearance for looking like a sickly victorian child in a pandemic, but you figured now was not a good time to joke.

the man sighed and leaned back on his chair. “what’s really bothering you, [name]?”

you pause for a moment before replying.

“maybe recruiting sunday was the wrong choice.” you don’t point out how his eyes widened. rarely do you question elio’s intentions of recruiting other hunters, he’s done you a big favor in the past and questioning him would be rather ungrateful. but still, you can’t help but let the monster in your heart claw at your ribs. “he doesn’t belong here.”

“and where do you suppose he will go? the express?”

you opened and closed your mouth, no reply leaving your lips as destiny’s slave sighed.

“you cannot project your wishes to be redeemed onto him.” he stands up with his arms crossed behind back. voice unwavering and so sure it left you looking down on your curled hands. feeling like a child being scolded for speaking out of turn. “you’ve made your choice. let him make his own.”

“mx. [name]?”

you snapped out of your flashback when sunday took hold of your shoulder. grip tight with concern and eyes furrowed with confusion. shaking your head you clutch your bag tighter and sigh for the nth time. “i’m sorry what were you saying?”

he pressed his lips to a thin line, letting his hand retreat to his side. “i said we should wait for the rain to stop before meeting with the others.”

oh, that’s right. sunday must have seen your message and came to pick you up. staring up at the sky, you try to predict how long you’ll be stranded under the rain with only his wing and being shielding you from the cold.

“is your wing tired yet?” you ask and look at him. “it might take a while before the rain stops.”

with a small smile he shook his head no. a chuckle leaving his lips when his hand came to fidget with his gold earring. a small habit you notice he’d do whenever he’s deep in thought. “don’t worry, this is a good form of exercise for me.”

you only hummed. eyes staring at your feet and the nearby puddles of water caused by the rain. 

“this reminds me of the time when you first found me.” sunday spoke, his voice laced with tenderness. 

you smile and chuckle. “i’m surprised you remember.”

he let out a snort and shrugged his shoulders. “well, it was quite memorable. i feel a couple hundred feet from the air and suddenly a black cat and its owner come to save me.”

“i take it this is your way of repaying the favor?” you jest.

“i suppose it is.”

as you both wait for the rain to stop, you take your time to reflect on how far you’ve gotten in your journey. you’ve changed, but you’re still the same person that boarded the train you didn’t even know existed. the same carelessness that landed you a quick scolding session from a higher being. the love for invention and taking pride when others use it. you still liked the conductor’s coffee over tea but drank it whenever kafka offered you a cup. you were still you after everything.

and sunday was the same. he was still a bit awkward with the others, but he didn’t completely avoid everyone anymore. he started joining everyone when eating and he still has that sacrificial mindset of his that lands him a chop to the head. and he still knew how to read everyone like a book.

“do you regret joining destiny’s slave?”

“there’s really no escaping you, is there?”

you reach out your hand to feel the rain under your skin. shoulders tensing when the cold drops felt more like bullets penetrating your skin. you ponder over the question in your head. you wonder what expression you were making for sunday to scoot just a tiny bit closer to you. a distance that far surpasses what he deems professional.

“just a bit.”

“pardon?”

“i regret it. but just a small smidget of it.” you take a deep breath and pull your hand back. taking out the golden ticket from your breast pocket, you stare at it with eyes filled with longing. “i miss akivili; more than i should.”

“akivili,” sunday mutters under his breath. “your aeon?”

you chuckle. “more than that. they were my family.”

turning the small ticket over, you see your name engraved in it with their handwriting. “they were my aeon. i never realized how much i devoted to them until i lost it all.”

this was why elio warned you to keep your head straight whenever it came to sunday. just like him, you were too devoted to a god that’s already long gone. the thought of akivili being dead often sent you spiraling into a hysterical fit of sadness. elio feared you would go out of your way to look into sunday’s methods on how to revive a fallen aeon.

“i never realized.” sunday murmurs, his molten gold eyes stared at the ticket with furrowed brows. “do the other hunters know?”

“just elio and kafka.” you flip the gold bar like a coin in your hands to distract yourself. “they were there when i went haywire and nearly got myself killed.” 

you feel sunday’s gaze bore a hole into the side of your head. “why didn’t you go back?”

that’s a good question, why didn’t you go back? it was obvious from the conductor’s anonymously sent letters and not to mention the missing posters of you plastered on the planets you’ve traveled to. the poor thing wanted nothing more than for you to come back, but you chose to become a slave to destiny instead. all because of your guilt and shame.

“elio often told me, “you love akivili too much” and i suppose he’s right,” you chuckle as you tuck the ticket back in your breast pocket. “i love them to death. and they’d be the only one to bring me back to life. they were my everything. and i killed them.”

“what?”

you turn to sunday, a bitter smile on your lips. “are you surprised?”

“i–” sunday paused, trying to piece his words together. “i don’t believe it.”

you sigh. “well, to say that i killed them wouldn’t be accurate. but still, the fact that i got them killed still remains.”

“surely there must be more to that story.” 

a chuckle left your lips. “i wish that were the case. but if i were to lay down the entire story, it all comes down to one thing.”

“and that is?”

“recklessness.”

you smile at sunday’s efforts at comforting you, but you didn’t like the frazzled look in his eyes. both pairs of his wings tense in an uncomfortable way it has you wincing. if you hadn't grazed your hand over his feathers he would’ve let them be tense the entire way back and you didn’t want that. you didn’t want to compromise his progress.

“do you think your a bad person, mx. [name]?” he asked. eyes trained on the tip of his shoes.

your hands pause their ministrations. caught off guard by his questions, your eyes widened as you looked at sunday. you notice the uncertainty in his eyes, the tension that started to build up on his shoulders, as if he’s bracing for a blow. the question isn’t unfamiliar, you often ask yourself after that particular mission and those conversations with elio. 

before you can respond, sunday lifts his gaze and meets yours. the same pool of gentleness you saw on the roof on your last mission. “i don’t think you are. i’ve seen firsthand on how much you care –about me and the others–how hard you try to keep everyone safe and on the right track.”

“do i now?” you jest with a tilt of your head.

sunday continues, his voice steady and sure. “everyone has their moments of regret. actions they wish to undo. but,” he takes a closer step to you and takes hold of your hand. “those moments don’t define your entirety. you taught me that, didn’t you?”

you think back on when you first met sunday as he rubbed circles on your knuckles. how he didn’t even want to eat the food you offered him in a fit of paranoia. the way he’d pace around the base at night because his past haunted his dreams. and the time when you sat him down after a nasty fall when he tried to take flight, a conversation of vulnerability that had him grimacing and hissing like a stray cat. 

“i did say that didn’t i.” you chuckle and close your eyes. the feeling of his spread wing encircled you in a slight hug, you didn’t even realize that the rain had died down to a soft drizzle.

“you told me that the mistakes i’ve made in the past shouldn’t chain me; that i’m free to move on from them. redemption isn’t a one-time thing; it’s a journey.”

you feel a lump in your throat form, voice cracking slightly. “and what if those moments have piled up to one giant mess that can be deemed unforgivable?”

“but i forgive you.”

his words hung in the air like a lifeline for you to grab. you look at sunday, truly look at him –not just a quick peek or glance. even when his bangs stuck to his forehead in the rain, you felt such a pull to his eyes that reminded you of the morning sun; the dawn you always looked forward to after a tough night. his eyes reflected the faith you’ve tried to show him when he first joined.

“sunday…” you start, but he only shakes his head.

“i forgive you, [name] –everyone has. i know you’re trying, and that means more than the mistakes you’ve made in the past.”

slight tears prick at the corner of your eyes as you lean your head on his chest. “and who gave you the right to forgive me huh? i know you haven’t forgiven yourself for what you’ve done back in penacony.”

“then i’ll repent,” his arm pulled you closer to his chest, his hand supporting the back of your head. “even the devil would kiss your eyes and beg for forgiveness if it meant you’ll be kinder to yourself.”

you feel the warmth of his embrace; the steady beating of his heart that sounded like peace and home. for a brief moment, you rejoice in his comfort. “sunday,” you whisper, voice still shaky. “it isn’t that easy.”

he gently lifts your chin to meet his gaze. “it never is, but it’s necessary, isn’t it? you can’t keep chaining yourself to the past forever.”

you close your eyes, feeling scared to meet his resolve. “i don’t think i can forgive myself for what happened.”

“but akivili would,” he says softly. “they were not my aeon, and i doubt they ever will, but i wholly believe they would forgive you. they would see the good in you, just as i do.”

“you’re one strange bird, sunday.” you playfully say. opening your eyes to peer at him with a smile. “the express would have loved you, just as much as i have.”

“akivili would have forgiven you, too.”

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

– in between missions.

pairing: sunday x gn!reader

premise: it's been an eventful six months since sunday joined the stellaron hunters. today marked one of their very rare day offs, and what better way to spend the day with the people that's taken care of him.

– warnings: slight angst if you squint, mentions of blood in some parts.

– author's note: updated the lore in this little mini-series (?) LMAOO thank you sunday leaks on sunday for bringing me back to life. so sorry for being a bit ia, tumblr has been such a pain in the ass that it slightly demotivated me to write. new layout for sunday fics too so yippie!! (totally not foreshadowing). art credits to 冒火锅海台 on Weibo for the art. | 4.1k words (LMFAO).

MORNING — 6:00 A.M.

before, sunday would wake up at the crack of dawn; waiting for the sun’s rays as he watered the plants he’d been taking care of. now –he still wakes up earlier than most– he spends his mornings in a big kitchen with the sound of kafka’s humming filling the bubbles of silences that start to form. it was always a pleasure helping the older woman cook everyone’s breakfast without having their loud bickering in the background (though sometimes he would grow paranoid if he never heard it throughout the day; he’s grown used to your voices).

before missions started, all the petty quips, and the laughter, sunday appreciated the quiet moments he gets to share with kafka.

“sunny, can you take over for me? i need to defrost silver wolf’s nuggets.”

sunday only hummed in response. body lazily slipping itself into kafka’s previous position of frying the leftover rice from yesterday. “sunny” was the woman’s name for him; a form of endearment, you said, she does it to everyone. sunday would never admit it himself (kafka often teased how adorable his morning voice was so he tried not to speak until after breakfast), but hearing that little nickname always sent a flurry of little butterflies down to his chest. collecting the pollen from the flowers you’ve carefully placed in between his ribs and spreading it all over his chest. no one has ever given him such a casual nickname before, so sunday had started to cling to it like a lifeline.

when the clock strikes 7:30, it usually means you're about to wake up. after patting his hands dry on a spare kitchen towel, sunday lifts his head and there you are. a small smile spread across his lips when you greeted kafka with a side hug. you still had your bed hair and your eyes were barely open; it was an endearing sight to see.

“good morning,” sunday snaps out of his daze when an arm wraps around his shoulder and pulls him close to your chest. sunday could distinctly smell the chocolate you ate with silver wolf the night before and the soft remnants of your scented candle. he let his head lean more into your touch as he mumbles a soft good morning straight to your heart. ignoring the pair of eyes that crinkle in amusement behind the kitchen counter.

by the time 7:50 rolls around, you’re fully awake. a cup of coffee in your hands as you, him, and kafka go door to door to wake up your little group. from the corner of sunday’s eyes, he sees kafka peer over blade’s door and a grumpy okay go through. on the other end, he sees you greet firefly good morning with a hug before disappearing into another hall to come and get elio. 

before he could even knock on silver wolf’s door, the wooden thing pulled open and he was met with the sight of the silver haired girl looking down at her game console. he chuckled in amusement, patting down the stray hairs that poked up and guided her to the kitchen. he made sure to ask if she’s beaten the boss yet and when she replied with an angry huff, sunday took it as a sign to not bring it up for a while.

it's already 8:10 when everyone is sitting down around the kitchen table. plates of warm fried rice, chicken nuggets, some slices of fruits, pancakes, and multiple cups of teas and coffees were laid down on the table. small chatter started to arise and sunday could feel the energy start to spike as well. as he took bite after bite until he felt your knee bump into his. when he turned to you, he was met with the sight of you pushing more food in his direction.

“you need to eat more,” you said before taking a bite of your pancake. “you’ll need the extra nutrients if you want to fly again.”

sunday just smiled and accepted your offerings without as much as a word.

roughly an hour passes before everyone is cleaning up their spaces. blade was on dishes duty while the rest went back to their rooms to get changed. sunday was in his quarters, buttoning up a spare polo blade had given him when he heard a knock on his door.

“good morning again.” you greet with a smile.

sunday smiled in return and urged you to come in. “good morning to you, too.”

“kafka and firefly are going out for groceries. do you want anything?”

sunday was taken back to the days where he would water the plants in his office back in the penacony. how he would run his finger down each leaf and smile to himself when a flower starts to bloom. if sunday only joined a few weeks ago, he’d declined immediately. but it's been almost half a year since he’s joined, and he’s feeling a bit more comfortable with asking for more personal things.

“plants,” he replies. “the small ones that are easy to take care of.”

you tilt your head curiously like an owl. “why plants?”

“i used to take care of some flowers back in dewlight pavilion every morning. i’d like to get back into that, if you don’t mind.”

sunday recognized that little smirk of yours. with a shake of his head, he accompanies you out his room after fixing up his hair and bid farewell to kafka and firefly.

“let’s get you all the plants you want then.” 

AFTERNOON — 2:38 P.M.

training in the afternoon was something sunday didn’t get quite used to. even now as he’s exchanging blows with blade, he feels quite unsure of his grip around the hilt of the wooden sword; how his footwork felt sloppy and uncoordinated. sunday wasn’t shocked (maybe, just slightly, a bit bitter) when the dark haired man knocked him off his feet for the seventh time in under two hours.

“you’re overthinking things too much,” the man grumbled, offering his hand to him. “it’s written all over your face; stop thinking about the nitty gritty things and start focusing on the task at hand. if you keep focusing on your opponent's footwork, you’ll end up ignoring his swings.”

“right, apologize. let’s go again.”

sunday had never felt such a competitive surge of emotions come over him whenever he trained with blade. the way he swung the charred sword in his hands; his body and how it moved so fluidly like water; and his determination to win despite beating him by more than a mile; it made sunday want to genuinely get better. blade fought like it would be his last battle, and he would go down with a fight.

“mister is getting better,” muttered silver wolf as she collapsed face first by your side, finishing her own training with elio. “he’s keeping up with the old man now.”

you brush away the bangs that stuck to her forehead and offer her a towel. elio, now in their cat form, sat down on your other side and started playing with the orange peels. “sunday has improved a lot huh? it feels like it was just yesterday when he first joined.”

“for reals.” the silver haired girl stretched and tried to reach over for the oranges.

a memory resurfaced in sunday’s mind when he caught sight of you peeling oranges for silver wolf. how you looked particularly at peace in the moment. his mind replayed the image of robin when she came back to penacony after the accident. he had such an intense amount of guilt for not being by her side at such a hard time, he isn't quite sure how to put it into words. 

“brother!” shouted robin as she entered his office, a bright smile on her face and her phone in hand.

before he could utter a word she had shoved her phone to his face, “an orange?” he asked with a confused tilt of his head.

robin nodded and said, “they say when someone close to you peels your oranges, it's a sign of having a strong relationship! is that why you’ve been peeling my oranges for me recently?”

sunday felt the wind be knocked out of him as his world turned upside down. blade had flipped him over to his back and as the cherry on top, whacked him on the head with his wooden sword. 

“for not paying attention,” he grumbled. “let’s call it a day.”

he didn’t get much of a word in when blade was already seated beside silver wolf (the girl shoving an orange slice to his mouth and him accepting it silently). sunday gets up from his lying position, patting down the dust on his (blade’s) clothes and takes a seat next to you. 

“do you mind opening your wings for me?” you ask as you place a small plate of orange slices on his lap.

taking one in his hand and a small bite, he lets the pair of wings by his waist stretch out and lay on your lap. your careful fingers and observant eyes scanning over every feather, smoothing out the ones that stuck out. it wasn’t long before silver wolf put down her console and started poking at his wings too.

“do you feel that, mister?” she asks.

he shakes his head with a small smile, “no, i do not.”

she only hummed and looked up at you. “will he be able to fly soon?”

you take a few seconds to respond.

“soon,” you mutter as your hands re-adjusted the exoskeleton that’s been supporting them. “they look better than when you first arrived. you seem rather curious, what gives?”

silver wolf pouted and shoved at you lightly. your chuckle rang in his ears like music. the same melodies he would play on his record player when the night feels too long. sunday leaned more to your side when the younger girl showed a pixelated character in her game and pointed to its wings. 

“when you fly again, mister, you have to take me with you!” she excitedly exclaimed with stars in her eyes. “i’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to fly.”

sunday felt a tug deep within his heart when he looked into her eyes. silver wolf, surprisingly, was very welcoming of him when he first joined. they got along fine and would even spend their free time in each other’s company. her excited demeanor reminded him of how robin looked when he first took to the skies. the animated expression on her face; her grin reaching her eyes; and the way she’s leaning forward in anticipation.

“when i fly again, i’ll be sure to let you know first.”

his reply was all the more worth it when the girl jumped in delight and landed on blade’s back. your laughter along with silver wolf’s excited blabbering and even blade’s protests made more flowers bloom inside his chest. sunday ceased his chuckling when he realized he had run out of oranges to eat. before he could even ask for more you’re already replacing his empty one with a new plate filled with peeled oranges.

“i can peel them myself, [name].” he says almost in a whisper.

“i know you can,” you dangle the orange peel in front of elio and let them play with it and stack them in a pile. “but let me do it for you.”

EVENING — 6:00 P.M.

“it’s my turn to decide what we get to eat!”

“it’s been your turn for two weeks. if anything, it’s my turn now.”

sunday could only push the two further and further apart, or at least try too. blade was a foot taller than him and obviously more bulked up than him; silver wolf might be the shortest but she knows how to use it to her advantage, zooming from one place to another like a little mouse. he could only plead with a lopsided smile when you enter the kitchen, your towel around your neck to catch the stray waters that dropped from your hair.

you sighed with the shake of your head and pulled silver wolf back into your chest. two arms snugly wrapped around her small shoulders as she kicked and pointed at blade. sunday on the other hand stepped in front of the man with a stretched arm, trying to calm down the silver haired girl as best as he could.

“at this point if you two can’t decide then i’ll just cook whatever i want.” you joked. both heads turned towards you and glared, but you only laughed and let silver wolf stomp her way to sit on the kitchen counter. “how about some sweet and spicy chicken for dinner? that way you both get what you want.”

sunday watched in amusement as silver wolf jutted her lower lip and mumbled on how she wanted cake. blade only slumped his shoulders and grumbled a low fine and started helping you take out all the ingredients from the fridge as well as the pans and bowls.

“i swear you two have worse cravings than a pregnant wom– ow!” you didn’t get to finish when blade purposely knocked your head when he opened a cabinet. your eyes narrowed at him while he only shrugged. a playful smirk on his lips as he shoved your head lower when you went to berate him.

a soft nudge on sunday’s back pushed him a bit forward. elio’s blue eyes in their cat form met his own gold ones and the two stared for a while. the cat motioned his head towards you and blade who chatted over dinner, not long, silver wolf also joined. 

“go join them.” was all they said before jumping down from the table and going to who knows where.

sunday didn’t get a chance to reply when a pair of arms snuck around his waist. he let out a noise between a surprised gasp and a shout that made you snort in amusement. when he turned to glare at you, you only stuck your tongue out and tied the apron around his waist.

“come help us make dinner, sunday.” 

and how could he say no when you’re already dragging him by the apron to the kitchen aisles with all the ingredients laid down.

by 7:15 p.m., kafka and firefly enter through the door and are met with a memorably amusing sight of sunday almost collapsing on their dining table as elio pushes a carton of milk to his direction. you and silver wolf were laughing at him with pointing hands and tears in your eyes. even blade cracked his own chuckle and rolled his eyes playfully as the halovian kicked him in the shin.

the taller woman surmised that sunday had fallen victim to blade’s insane spice addiction. the stray silver spoon on the table with the sauce was evidence. kafka let out a chuckle as firefly came over to his side –still keeping a bit of distance– and asking if he was alright.

“thought you were only getting groceries?” you ask with a raised brow. eyes surveying the amount of bags she and firefly had in their hands.

“there was a sale for clothes,” kafka reasoned. “how could we say no?”

you shake your head in disbelief and give the woman a side hug. “dinner will be ready in ten. help the poor angel soothe his tongue in the meantime.”

kafka laughed as she dropped her bags by the living room couch and guided sunday to sit down. firefly handed him an empty glass and offered to pour the milk in it. he shook his head no and did it himself. the poor boy downed the drink in one go and it didn’t seem enough to soothe his burning tongue so firefly went to get another carton from the fridge.

sunday furrowed his brows and stuck out his tongue. no doubt his taste buds won’t be working for a while.

“why does blade put so much spice in his food?” he questions the older woman who only smiled. her eyes glazed over to where the said man was and sunday followed. 

“bladie can’t taste anything that isn’t spicy,” kafka said, her eyes not once leaving blade’s figure. “a living corpse can’t really taste anything. spice is considered a pain sensation; pain is the only thing he can feel and taste.”

sunday frowns at this new information. he knows little of blade’s past and had made no effort to try and dig it up. he was curious, yes, but it must be an incredibly sensitive topic if every night the man slips away from his bedroom seeking you or kafka out to soothe the mara that’s coursing through his body.

“i… see.” a hand came to ruffle up his hair. he looked up to see kafka smiling down at him and handed him another cup of milk.

“try to ask him about it someday. maybe you’ll be able to help.”

sunday keeps that information at the back of his mind until everyone finishes cooking dinner.

the clock hit 7:25 and everyone decided to eat by the living room to see what kafka and firefly bought in their mini shopping spree. he sat in between you and blade on the floor, using the small coffee table in front of you to hold your food while silver wolf sat on the couch behind him. her legs over your shoulders and slouched on the couch.

time surprisingly passed slowly tonight. only ten minutes had actually passed of kafka showing off her new coat, but to sunday it had felt like eternity. he absentmindedly tossed his food around his plate, pushing away all the spicy pieces of chicken to the edge of his plate.

“not eating the spicy chicken now are we?” sunday whipped his head to blade and glared. warmth rising to his cheeks, wings fluttering in embarrassment when he remembered what had happened not too long ago. 

“your “normal” amount of spice nearly sent me to a coma,” he rebutted with a roll of his eyes. “so pardon me for not wanting to be sent to the hospital.”

you let out a loud laugh and leaned back on the couch. silver wolf was now using his head as support when she agreed wholly with his statement. firefly let out a quiet cough to silence her laugh while kafka chuckled. blade only rolled his eyes and took the pieces of chicken on his plate and placed it on his own.

“you said you wanted to try.” he argued back. a teasing lilt to his voice as he placed a piece of chicken to his mouth to add more salt to the injury.

“a grave mistake that was.”

you cease your laughing and lean on your propped up arm. “well look at you two, getting along so well!”

sunday scowled while blade scoffed. both picking up pieces of food and silently chewing. what started as a small bump of sunday’s elbow turned into a small petty argument about spice tolerance.

“it is quite sweet of you bladie,” kafka started. “for taking all the spicy pieces off of sunny’s plate, i mean.” 

you jumped to the wagon immediately and nodded. “agreed! you’ve never done that for anyone here before. i’m starting to think you’re playing favorites.”

“one more word and i’m dumping the rest of the chili oil on your plates.”

that had shut you up immediately. for extra measures, you scooted away from them both with your plate close to your chest. “shutting up now…”

NIGHT — 11:20 P.M.

sunday let out a long sigh as he tossed and turned in his bed. he had lost count of how many times he’s replayed tonight’s dinner in his mind to at least try and get some sleep and not be plagued by his nightmares. tonight was joyful, and he’d like to keep it that way till the end of the day. but his insomnia had struck him again like always. he’s already drunk two pills from the medication you bought him and it's yet to take effect.

with one last sigh, sunday threw off the sheets over his body and stalked out of his room as quietly as he could. the base was dark in the dead of night. the halls looked more ominous and longer than normal, something he believed was taken out of a horror film. when he first wandered these halls at this hour, sunday would feel the pricks of his paranoia.

but unlike the first time, there were no longer stray feathers of ravens following his wake. his feet weren’t stained by his blood as he dragged his body to the direction of salvation. in these halls, sunday wasn’t carrying a knife he used to plunge into his own chest to try and make the weight of the sins he didn’t commit a little lighter. he was free; free as he could be in the safety of everyone’s presence.

his gaze shifted to the slightly ajar door that led to your workshop. he frowned as he realized you were staying up late again. when he peered into the small crack, sunday was met with the sight of firefly hunched over your desk, sound asleep with stray pieces of fabric by her feet.

the nights at base were usually cold so sunday quickly walked to his room again to get a spare blanket. as quietly as he could, the halovian entered your workshop, silently cursing when the door creaked slightly. making sure he didn’t step on any of the fabrics on the floor, sunday draped the blanket over the girl’s shoulders.

another memory of his resurfaced. on nights like these, robin would sneak into his office with a pillow and blanket in her hands. she would guide his head gently to lay on the pillow and not the harsh wooden table and make sure the blanket over his shoulders didn’t slip until morning came. by instinct, sunday’s hand came to smooth down firefly’s hair and whispered good night.

he started picking up the stray pieces of whites, blues, and blacks from the floor and neatly folded them one by one. placing them in neat piles on your table. with one last look to firefly’s figure, he smiled to himself and quietly shut the door behind him. his next stop was the kitchen to brew himself a cup of tea.

“he’s gone now, firefly.”

even as you called out to her, firefly did not budge and kept her head in between her folded arms. you shook your head and sat down next to her. you had witnessed what happened and you could only guess the conflicted feelings the girl felt.

“do you think he’s a bad person, little knight?” you ask, hands picking up one of the fabrics sunday had graciously folded and laid them on the table. a measuring tape around your shoulders and a pencil snuggly on your ear.

“he’s done bad things, but…” you hum in reply. firefly’s voice was muffled because of her arms but you heard her perfectly fine, much to her dismay. “i don’t think he’s a fully bad person. i just find it… awkward to interact with him.”

“do you want to interact with him?” you wonder. “as friends i mean.”

firefly finally raised her head. hand clutching the blanket draped over her shoulders as the other ghosted over the spot where sunday had patted down and whispered good night.

“i don’t know.”

you only hum. “sunday is rather strange isn’t he? he’s quite the piece of work if you ask me.”

“what about you?” firefly fires back, scooting her chair closer to you. “do you think he’s a bad person.”

“no. no i don’t.” you answer immediately and feel firefly pause. “he’s kindest person i’ve ever met.”

“i see…”

you pat her head gently and fixate your gaze back to your table.

“he’s a lot more like us than anyone expected. sunday has done bad things that hurt those around him, but we’ve also done that haven’t we? take your time. all of us were lonely at some point, so it’s also his first time he’s ever craved someone’s company. we’ve all done that too, didn’t we?”

when a new day started (around 1:56 a.m.) she made her way back to her room. sunday’s blanket was still wrapped around her even when she laid down on her own bed. she never pointed out how you purposefully drafted a space for the ticket you’ve always hidden on sunday’s new uniform.

© vxnuslogy 2024. please do not copy, repost, or translate any of my works.

– hate is a strong word.

pairing: moze x gn!reader

premise: your relationship with moze could be summarized with three simple words; "i hate you." but you can only deny so much when the word "hate" also means "love" in both of your books.

– warings: mentions of blood and daggers, ooc (?) moze (i have not started the quest at all LMAO)

– author's note: for my dearest @lowkeyren @st6rly @ughscara and @tragedy-of-commons aka my fellow normal moze stans <3333 art credits to @.code_tesseract on twitter!! | ~500 words.

“i hate you.” perfectly surmised your relationship with a fellow assassin. the words are hastily and carelessly uttered with one another at any given moment, one would assume its your way of showing your affection. and they aren’t wrong.

“i hate you.” you mutter under your breath as you lay on the grass. your arm bleeding as moze rolled his eyes and threw a roll of bandages into your stomach. the regret of making a blood oath with the kid who’s been stealing your spot as the greatest assassin prodigy was starting to kick in. the realization that you and he are now forever tethered; past, present, and future lives are now spent trying to one-up each other. you don’t know if you want to laugh or cry. moze always seemed to throw away all your logic out of the window with just a glare.

“i hate you.” he grumbles when the two of you are unfortunately paired up for a mission. with a click of your tongue, you jump from roof to roof to try and lose him. split up, you said, it would be faster, but moze would always tug you back by the collar of your shirt and lay down his plans.

“i hate you.” you mumble as he throws your arm over his shoulders. “good to know you’re still kicking.” you scoff at him and try to pull away but it only makes moze’s grip on your waist and arm tighter.

“do you want to die?” he angrily counters and you click your tongue. “if it isn’t by your hands, no, no i don’t.”

moze hated how you made his ears ring with such simple words. to bystanders –outsiders of your relationship– they would be concerned, but to moze, it was a declaration of the highest affection. 

“then don’t die now,” he mutters. “your life is mine to take.”

“not if i take yours first.”

to everyone, it was clear as day that you two hated each other with a burning passion that would rival the sun.

yes, hate was a strong word, but what else could describe the burning in his chest whenever you pin him to the wall? his dagger in your hand as you press it to the apple of his throat, your eyes narrowed down into a nasty glare while your tone drips venom from the tips of your teeth. moze hated the way your body always gravitated towards him; you were the planet that revolved around him out of necessity and want. 

it was hatred and it always will be.

you will always hate moze for constantly stealing your spotlight; your daggers and cloaks; his blood that stuck to you like glue, forever reminding you of your oath; the hoodie he always used to shield you from the rain; iron clawed fingers that always brushed over your lips; and the eyes that always spelled “i want you” in every and any language known to the universe. 

it was impossible not to hate each other. and even more impossible to say “i love you” before every mission when the words “hate” and “love” are so intertwined they start to bleed into each other. 

“i hate you.” you say as you shove at his chest. moze rolls his eyes and pulls your mask to hide your face. “i hate you more.”

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

– nuvole bianche.

pairing: scaramouche x gn!reader

premise: scaramouche, or kunikuzushi to you, never dreams. but after that accident on prom night, he's been dreaming more than he liked. he wonders if his past actions were actually enough.

– warnings: angst with slight comfort <3 + slight spoilers for the game "until then"

– author's note: this is what happens after i watch a playthrough of every depressing indie game. art credits to @.inertraccoon on twitter. | ~4.7k words.

“look at you working so hard,” you tease as you sit beside him. “what happened to quitting hm?”

he only rolls his eyes at you and elbows your side. you scoff in offense and shove him back. for a while, the two of you went back and forth elbowing one another until you burst out into a fit of laughter. scaramouche only clicks his tongue, his eyes focusing back on the set of black and white keys in front of him. all the while feeling your lingering stare and the way it made the hairs on his arms stand.

“if you’re going to disturb me then leave. i have no use for distractions.” his voice was stern but you only threw him a smile. your own finger danced on the keys with his in perfect harmony, scaramouche couldn’t help the small smirk that twitched at his lips.

“will you finally tell me the name of your piece?” you ask. 

he paused in his movement and just stared in front of him. you continued to play his piece with ease. scaramouche didn’t want to acknowledge how your fingers had memorized every line and curve of his creativity with such precision; he begins to wonder if you’ve taken all of his talents in playing the piano.

“not a chance!” he replied, tone higher than normal.

you let out a sigh and shook your head. scaramouche stares at you with a blank expression, he takes note of the fading light from your eyes and the way your hands slowly drop to your lap. your head turned here and there, taking your surroundings in for some odd reason he didn’t want to figure out.

“you’re acting strange.” he points out and you smile. 

“i just remembered how we first met, that's all.”

he lets out a groan and drags a hand down his face. “don’t remind me.”

your laugh ringed out the empty music room as you playfully shove at his shoulder. 

“oh come on!” you say, wiping the pretend tears from your eyes. “our first meeting was cute.”

“i was ready to cut off your fingers.”

“like i said, it was cute.”

he looks at you with a bewildered expression. his lips turned into an odd smile and his brow kept twitching in annoyance. “you’re such a pain.”

“don’t lie to me kuni,” you tease. “i know you love me!”

“and for the nth time, don’t call me that!”

you cease your teasing and just sigh. body leaning into him despite his protests. you drum your fingers on your lap as he continues to play the piece he’s so keen to keep a secret despite you helping him create it in the first place. for a moment, you close your eyes and relish in scaramouche’s company. taking deep inhales, catching small whiffs of his perfume and tea he had this morning, then opening your eyes as you exhale. 

“another boy went missing today.” you randomly say which made him pause.

“who is it this time?” he shifts closer to you; knees touching as you feel his hand interlace itself with your own. you bury your face further into the crook of his neck. you don’t mention the way his ears flush a cute pink and how his breathing turned shaky.

“it was kazuha today.” you whisper. “how long do you think before another one goes missing?”

he scoffs. you could practically see the frown that tugs at his lips. “don’t know and don’t care.”

“do you really not care?”

you detach yourself from him and look at his eyes. they were such an electric shade of purple, it almost felt illegal to look at them for free. 

“why should i?”

“kuni come on.”

he glares at you and you screw your mouth shut.

scaramouche lets out a deep sigh and stood up. he grabbed your arm and started tugging you out of the music room.

“come on,” he didn't bother to look back as he spoke. “we’ll be late.”

“what if i’m the next to disappear?”

“then i’ll look for you.”

you stare at the back of his head with your mouth slightly agape. neither of you mention the way your classmates stared at your hands and the burning of your ears and cheeks.

– –

what a disaster, you thought. what was supposed to be a heartfelt reunion for a son and his mother turned into a bitter one-sided screaming fest. you flinch when the harsh slamming of the door echoed into the now silent kitchen. 

“i’ll…” you start, pushing your chair back and giving an empathetic smile to the woman who looked identical to your hot headed friend. “go look for him. please excuse me.”

as you close the sliding doors, you couldn’t help but let out a long sigh. a hand dragging itself down your face as you try to spot the treehouse scaramouche had told you about. you dragged your feet into his old backyard and it wasn’t long before you spotted a tree with a small wooden house, the bark had worn out ladders. taking a deep breath, you climb up.

“kuni, you there?” you call out but no one replied. when your head peeked into the slightly ajar door, you feel your heart sink. there he was, in all his mopey state, knees hugging his chest as his eyes stared blankly at the doll in his limp hand.

“hey..” you quietly approach him. “what was that back there? i thought you two were okay now.”

“i told you this wouldn’t work out.”

you frown at his pessimism. “of course it’s not going to work out if you aren’t even trying to–”

“but i am trying!” he shouts, abruptly standing up from his sitting position. you felt a twinge of concern–fear– when he glared at you with tears pricking his eyes while his hand tightly gripped the doll like a lifeline. “is it my fault she wasn’t there when i needed her the most?! is it my fault that she was slowly spiraling into depression and compromising all her relationships?!”

“kuni come on,” you slowly stand and try to calm him down. “you know i don’t mean it like that.”

“then what did you mean!?” he stomps his way over to one of the desks and slams his hands down. you have no doubt that the adults back in the house heard it with how loud it was. 

“i wanted my mother to be there for me when i lost someone important to me.” he murmurs, head hanging low. one hand grips the stray picture frame on the desk and in one violent action, throws it across the room. you flinch at the loud shattering of glass clamored in the rickety old treehouse.

“kuni!” 

“you said you understand.”

“what?”

your feet subconsciously stepped back when scaramouche turned to glare at you – eyes cold and cruel. he pressed his lips into a thin line, his eyes following your movement like a hawk.

“you said you understood me, was that also a lie?” his voice cut through the air like a cold knife. he no longer looked like the kunikuzushi you grew up with. the words get stuck in your throat, your mind racing to try and say something–anything.

“but i do understan–”

“then why are you taking her side!?”

“but i’m not taking anyone’s side!” you take a deep breath and rub your temples. “kuni, please, just try to calm down.”

he only clicked his tongue, the sound harsh like the oncoming storm outside.

“where are you going?!” you shout, chasing after him.

“don’t follow me.”

“kuni!”

you try to reach for his hand but the sharp slap echoes in the rain-soaked air. you felt your eyes widen and for a while, you saw a flash of regret and hurt in his eyes as you let your hand drop to your side. he could glare at you all he wanted but you’ll always see through him– at least he hoped you could still recognize him. the way your frown deepened, how you cradled your wrist, and the way your hair slowly hid your eyes– scaramouche was sure you would be the next one to leave him.

“i’m trying my best to understand, kunikuzushi.” you whisper.

how long has it been since you called him by his full name?

“but it’s so hard when all you do is detach yourself when someone tries to get close to you. it’s suffocating y’know?”

“then leave,” he replies, colder than before.

“and what if i actually did?”

scaramouche opened and closed his mouth to reply but no words came out. what would he do if you actually left? would he return to his reclusive self? pushing anyone and everyone away if they tried to get too close? but wasn’t he already doing this right now? what is wrong with him.

“you never tell me anything, kuni, not how you feel nor what's going on,” tears prick your eyes as you try to approach him again. “can’t you see how much this is hurting us? when will you finally let it go? when will you finally move on from the things that have hurt you instead of holding grudges? it’s so painful to see you so stuck in the past.”

“i’m not as forgiving as you.”

“you don’t have to forgive her for anything!”

“you don’t understand.”

“then make me understand! for once kuni, just tell me what you’re feeling instead of leaving me to guess.”

this was going nowhere, he thought. so he did what he does best: runaway and never look back. you call out to him, you even try to catch up to him but the sudden downpour of rain made it hard to make out his figure that slowly disappeared. he ground his teeth together and gripped his hair. 

“i’m a fucking mess.”

– –

scaramouche stared at himself in front of the mirror. dressed in formal kimono for tonight’s prom theme. a deep sigh left him as he readjusted his haori. the house was unusually chatty tonight – most probably because his mother was downstairs with nahida and her mother. it filled the normally quiet and serene atmosphere with something warm.

it’s been around a week and a half since you had last talked to him. he hasn’t heard from you since he dropped off the box of dango with a note asking for a dance, he hopes you liked them. he reached for the gel on his desk but he hesitates, not sure if he wanted to gel his hair back or just leave it as is. you’ve always nagged him about being presentable, now it’s become a habit of his to bring a small mirror and a comb wherever he goes.

a knock echoed in his room. 

“may i come in, kunikuzushi?” ei, his mother, asked from the other side.

for a brief moment, he hears your voice. urging him to open the door and let his mother inside, hear her out. with another sigh he reluctantly gets up from his seat and opens the door.

“do you need anything?” he asks bluntly, raising a brow at the older woman her mouth opened and closed, eyes looking everywhere but him. it makes him frown but he doesn’t dwell on it for long.

ei cleared her throat and gestured if she could come in. scaramouche relented. 

“i’m glad the kimono still fits you,” she finally says. “blue suits you better than purple.”

“thank you…” he quietly mutters, ignoring the sudden spike in his temperature.

“before you leave, i wanted you to have this.”

a feathered ornament was placed on his hands and he felt the wind get knocked out of him. he’s suddenly taken back to the old backyard where he and a younger boy played under the big sakura tree that housed their little base.

scaramouche bitterly smiled and twirled the ornament in between his fingers. “i thought you threw it away.”

ei frowns. her hands smoothing out the creases of his white nagagi and his haori. “you treasured that little feather, how could i possibly throw it away.”

he doesn’t say anything more and lets his mother fix up his appearance. she helped him readjust the kakuobi on his waist, brush out his hair, and even assisted him in making the red eyeliner he always wore be even.

“is [name] at the venue already?” he asks as he boarded the car, waving goodbye to nahida at the porch.

“i assume they are,” miko answered as she buckled the seat belt. “be sure to make up with them alright? all of my hard work in getting you that kimono from chiori would be wasted if you don’t.”

scaramouche rolls his eyes and looks out the window. he can’t help but frown at the feeling that’s swimming in his guts. something bad is going to happen–he was sure of it.

– –

the venue was obnoxiously – in his mind– decorated, but it was overall decent. in the distance he could see some of his classmates (re: friends) on the dance floor. when aether’s eyes caught sight of him, the blonde boy immediately waved him over but scaramouche only ducked under his hand when venti wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

“get off of me!” he protests and tries to run away but a tanned hand dragged him back to the dance floor.

“come on man,” sethos grins at him. “let loose a bit!”

and that’s how scaramouche got dragged all over the venue with his little band of misfits. xiao and albedo were chatting by their table, the purple haired boy threw his middle finger up when albedo stuck out his tongue at his misery while xiao only rolled his eyes in amusement. the twins were by the dj requesting songs and heizou was on stage performing with childe.

scaramouche sighed for the nth time and let a small smile slip out. he only rolled his eyes when venti tugged at his cheeks and when charlotte took a photo of them. for the entire night, he let himself enjoy everyone’s company, all the while, keeping an eye out for you.

“scara, look over there.” itto nudged him and pointed across the room.

his heart suddenly started racing when he saw your figure slip away behind the gymnasium doors.

“was that [name]?” lumine asked, her brows furrowed. “should we go follow them? it’s raining pretty heavily...”

rain. scaramouche felt his feet run towards the doors, ignoring the shouts of concern from his peers. it was raining tonight. he couldn’t shake the growing dread that gripped his heart as the rain poured down. 

the raindrops felt like small bullets that penetrated his skin. he was in pain and he didn’t know why. his mind kept screaming at him to run, and run, and run, but he didn’t know where he was running to. to catch up to you? no. that’s wrong, he is trying to catch you, so yes. maybe?

“you’re almost there.” a voice that sounded like yours echoed and everything went white.

scaramouche was suddenly inside an all too familiar room–your music room. there was a piano in the middle where you sat on the stool, the giant window in front of you was left open. the white curtains flowed with the wind as he tentatively tried to take a step closer.

“you know,” you start, fingers pressing onto the keys to play a familiar tune he knew by heart. “you never really told me what you titled this piece.”

“how is that relevant now?” he snapped, voice raising in volume. why did he sound so frustrated? why did this feel so familiar but strange at the same time?

“i guess there are some things you’ll never get to know, huh?” your tone was sad, but accepting.

you stop playing at the part he composed for you.

“why did you stop?” his voice turned shaky, the panic settling in his gut.

you look back at him and smile. “you don’t need to be too hard on yourself you know.”

“hey!” he shouts, chasing after your vanishing figure. when he tried you catch your wrist, it suddenly turned to smoke, inevitably slipping through his fingers. he felt his heart drop when he looked to see you standing in front of the giant window.

“you need to go now, kuni.”

“[name]!” he cried, desperation clawing at his chest.

you flash him one last smile. 

“don’t leave me alone!”

and then he was back outside under the harsh downpour of rain. his hands meet the pavement hard, he felt the pain shoot up all the way to his head but he didn’t care. this was too familiar–too painfully fucking familiar. his breathing started to turn shallow, vision blurring with his tears as the rain continued to pound down on him, drenching him straight to the bone.

give up.

he refused.

give up.

he refused.

give u–

“kuni?” 

he looks up from the pavement and he sees you there, across the street. under the bus stop with your hand under the rain. there were tears on the corners of your eyes as you realized that it was him.

you laugh in disbelief and rub at your tears. “you came all this way, for me?”

“you idiot,” he curses at you as he stands up. “i wouldn’t have had to if you hadn’t left. i still want that dance!”

scaramouche felt his smile slip away when a flash appeared in his mind– a warning, a memory, an inkling feeling that something bad is going to happen.

“don’t!” 

but it was too late. he willed his feet to stand up and help you. save you like you did to him. what went wrong? everything was fine–he was talking with his mother again, he can play the piano without having the urges to jump off a cliff, he had friends now, he had you. so why did everything start clicking into place in his mind, as if this was how it’s supposed to end? 

am i too late? he asked himself as he reached a hand for you. everything was too slow, he caught every expression that went across your face that was painfully illuminated by the yellow headlights. 

will the last time you played piano together truly be the last?

“why are you smiling…?” he asks, voice breaking in disbelief.

but if that truly was the last time, then how will you find out that he named the piece after you?

“why are you doing this to me!” he shouted, voice echoing in the empty streets.

he didn’t quite pick up on what you said the last time you two played in the music room. it was something along the lines of “you’re so mean.” or “why won’t you tell me?” but those don’t feel quite right. why couldn’t he remember?

“don’t leave.” he pleaded, just above whisper.

why didn’t he pay enough attention?

you once told him, “the greatest movies are never made.” but he often wanted to counter them with “but here you are in front of me.” will he never get the chance to tell you that?

ah. 

now he remembers.

the words you said that day, it was….

“i love you, kunikuzushi.”

– – 

beep. beep. beep.

so this was it? he asked himself as he stared at his hands. they were bandaged and bloodied. the heart monitor’s rhythmic beeping made his ears ring, feeling each beep drill itself into his skull as the doors opened and a flood of nurses and doctors rushed in.

the mask over his lips continued to fog up with his labored breathing, adding to that suffocating feeling inside his chest. everything was too much– too loud, too bright, too real. he wanted to leave. he needed to see you. but his vision blurred as his body gave out, collapsing back on his bed. was he dying? but didn’t he already die? this didn’t make sense.

a warm hand gripped his arm. when he turned to look at the person he felt the last flickers of hope in his heart die out. it wasn’t you.

there by his side was his mother, eyes blown wide and breath shaky as she tried to calm her breathing. she looked so strange, that frazzled and panicked look in her eyes didn’t belong there. she was supposed to look stern, strong–unyielding, not this fragile, worried mother.

“[name]...” he whispers. still clinging onto that small shimmer of hope.

“i’m so sorry, kunikuzushi.” ei’s voice brokes as she hung her head low, tears dropping to his arm. 

“oh.”

the word slipped from his lips, barely audible. so it was a dream after all. 

– – 

home didn’t feel quite like home without you. even more so as his acquaintances (re: friends) helped him store everything in boxes. the twins were arguing over something, xiao and albedo’s little sisters were playing in one of the spare rooms, childe and itto were competing to see who could carry the most boxes, and his mothers were helping move his piano.

scaramouche ended the call with a breath of relief. he pocketed his phone and stared blankly at the sealed cd in one of the boxes. ei told him it was found on your body on the night of the accident. he frowned at the memory but picked up the cd nonetheless.

nahida told him he had run off in the middle of prom when his mother arrived. you chased after him and the both of you unfortunately got into an accident. the dreams–hallucinations maybe– were created by consciousness to cope with the guilt, his psychiatrist said. zhongli said it would be best to distance himself from anything that reminded him of you, but how could he? not when every turn he took you in this small town you were there.

ripping the plastic and placing the cd in his worn out cd player, he skipped through the songs. a smile creeping up his lips when he realized you finally got it right. you burned the cd with songs he actually liked.

“hello…? is this thing working?”

scaramouche stopped. so did everyone present in the room when they heard your voice. from the corner of his eye, he saw miko try to approach him but ei held her back. for the nth time in the past 8 months since he woke up, he felt grateful for the woman.

“it’s flashing red so i’m just gonna assume it’s recording. if it’s not then this is gonna be very, very, embarrassing.” you laugh and paused. “i’m not really sure why i’m doing this. maybe it’s because i’ve been having this strong sense of deja vu? it kinda keeps me up at night, y’know? the thought that i won’t be able to tell you, so here i am, recording just in case something bad happens.”

he winces at your keen intuition but he makes no effort to stop playing the recording.

“it’s… been hard. seeing you in so much pain, i mean. it just became harder when we grew up and all i could do was just… watch. i didn’t know how to help. i was there, but it never felt like it was actually enough. was i doing enough, kuni?” you chuckle bitterly. “i never got why you wanted to be called scaramouche. names are an important part of someone’s identity, so i kinda get why you wanted to be called something else, but i don’t think i’ll see you as someone who isn’t kunikuzushi. sorry about that. maybe i’m also a bit stuck in the past, like you.”

he feels ei sit beside him, guiding his head to lay on her shoulder as your voice continues to echo throughout the now empty house.

“i hope in the future, you aren’t so hard on yourself and you continue playing the piano. seeing that spark in your eyes again, though almost always momentarily, makes me really happy. i felt a part of me become jealous. i never liked piano that much; i only ever played it because you liked it. i felt a little bit left behind. i don’t know. i-i just thought, you’d be stuck with me in this gray area for a little longer.” your voice started to shake. “i felt really sick and guilty when i started to hope you’d fail the audition. i’m so sorry about that. you were working so hard, and that made me want to work hard too! so i started practicing without you. i asked furina to mentor me, and oh boy, was she strict.” you chuckle. “but it was worth it. seeing that look of bewilderment on your face when i played nuvole bianche for auditions was really cute! i don’t think i’ve seen that expression on your face before.”

“w-whoa, whoa why is the red flashing slowing down?! is the recording gonna end?!”

he laughs at your panicked state. fiddling with the cd case in his hands.

“well okay then, i’ll wrap this message up. kuni, i’m so glad i met you when i climbed over our fenced gates. i’ll never forget that confused look on your face when i jumped over it and landed in your backyard and just, started listening to you play. you know, i was very sure you’d call your mom and have me kicked out.” you chuckle and take a deep breath. “i like you, you know. like very, very much and not in the friends type of like. for the longest time, i’ve had the biggest crush on you. i’m surprised you didn’t notice! hell even xiao figured it out and he’s the densest person i know!”

scaramouche turns to glare at xiao who only shrugged his shoulders.

“but yeah, i like you. i can’t really make a grand confession, i suck at words. if… if you really want to know how much i like you, then come over to my place and i’ll show you this piece i made for you! i don’t know what to title it yet but i’m thinking about “kabukimono’s finale.” oh crap the red flashing is gone now! okay, okay, bye now kuni! and please don’t be too hard on yourself okay? remember,” you pause. “i love you.”

and like that, the recording ended. scaramouche sat there on the floor with his mother for a long time. everyone had finished moving his stuff out and all that was left were his piano and the cd player in front of him. slowly, he closed his eyes and let out a shaky breath. 

“thank you,” he says in a quiet whisper. “for being here, i mean.”

ei smiled and patted down his hair, still using her shoulder as his makeshift headrest.

“you’re welcome.” she replied with a kiss to the crown on his head.

he carefully placed the cd back in its case and tucked it into a box labeled “[name].” standing up, he takes one last look around the house.

“thank you,” he whispered once more. scaramouche could have sworn he saw you turn to look at him from the piano stool to flash him a smile and a small wave. the light reflecting in your eyes reminded him of the filtered sunlight that slipped through the cracks of that giant window in your music room. he wonders if this was real or just a final farewell his mind conjured up to seal the gaping hole inside his chest. but maybe it didn’t matter.

he isn’t quite sure if you understood the weight of both your words, but they were enough. the house is quiet again, but not nearly as lonely as it felt after he woke up. there was a feeling of peace in the silence, like a final note that’s still lingering just long enough for the melody to be completed. 

as he walked out of the house, leaving the boxes for the movers to move, scaramouche felt a sense of peace wash over him. the pain and guilt of losing you will never really disappear, but he had to walk down a path without you sooner or later. but for the first time since that accident, he felt like he could finally let go of the past. 

step after step as he crossed the road and further away from his childhood home, he smiled– a small bittersweet smile. this won’t be enough to ease the pain but it was the beginning of something new. and for now, that was enough.

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

– to fall for the sun.

pairing: albedo x gn!reader

premise: albedo was not a poet, but for you, he could try to become one.

– warnings: fluff, yearner albedo, he sucks at poetry (he's trying his best), poor attempts in making poetry at the end

– author’s notes: this is a remake of my old albedo fic but instead of angst, its fluff so yippie!! art credits goes to @.Jotto75 on twitter. thank you to @lowkeyren for proofreading and creating the title <3 | ~1.4k words.

“mr. albedo, are you alright?” sucrose, his assistant, asked. worry etched in her eyes as she watches her mentor’s hunched figure throw away another crumpled piece of paper. 

“yes, yes, i’m quite alright. please don’t mind me.”

but albedo was anything but alright. he pushed his messy hair back with his hand and let out a tired sigh. albedo had ultimately underestimated your talent in making poetry–he had always assumed you just wrote whatever you felt on paper–no need for fancy words or metaphors. yet here he was, on the third day in a row, filling the small trash bin in his office with poorly written declarations of love.

albedo wonders how you do it. you, a traveler from fontaine, coming to visit mondstadt to explore the nation’s ballads and poetry, had easily captured the hearts of many by just walking down the cobblestone paths that lead inside its walls. you with your charming presence, felt like a character from an inazuman fairytale, had even captured the bard in green. but more than that, you had captured his attention—maybe even his heart—by simply existing.

with one glance you had enamored his chalky heart. suddenly, the paint brushes that were in his hand itched to be used on a blank canvas to paint your portrait, wanting to forever remember the smile that glowed under the afternoon sun. albedo could’ve sworn he saw fresh cecilias beneath your feet with every step you took inside the city. 

in one glance, you flashed him a knowing smile and gave him a bow. 

venti played his lyre and before the chalk prince knew, he was tugged into a dance near the city’s fountain. everyone laughed and danced and sang, but all albedo could see was the way you sat by the bard, a quill in your hand and a piece of parchment on the other. you cleared your throat, capturing everyone’s attention and started reciting your magnum opus.

albedo didn’t quite understand most of its content–a real shame he thinks–but there was one line that made his mind tick in interest.

“why does icarus continue to fly despite his impending doom?”

he was not a poet by any means, he was a researcher, a slave to finding the truth, but he found the mystery behind your words worth uncovering. 

so for the next few days you stayed in mondstadt, albedo had asked for your time to ask you questions. the two of you spent your time in dragonspine in his lab. he asked about your inspirations as you chatter about your love for words and asked him in return on why he paints. albedo concluded after your time together that you were simply born with poetry running through your veins and pumping metaphors and analogies to your beating heart. there was no sense of logic in your being–it wasn’t a bad thing, emotions seemed to transcend all logic to begin with–and he found that incredibly charming.

which leads to his predicament now: inside his office, trying to rack his brain on a verse that would evoke the same feeling you showed him when you first met.

he loved your poetic mind, the calluses from pens on your fingers, your ink-stained blouses and hands, the love letters hidden under the guise of friendly affections—he loved you. but he didn’t know how to showcase it. relationships were troublesome–hard to maintain. but he wanted to try. he didn’t fall in love easily–he didn’t even know he was capable of falling in love–but he felt his growing yearning for you deep in his chalk stained bones. for once in his life, albedo wanted his fixation and interest in you to last a lifetime, afraid of the lingering bittersweet sensation that you would leave him.

with one last sigh, he picked up his sketchbook and left his office. a change of pace would surely inspire him, he tried to convince himself, but not even a few steps later, he sees you by the entrance of the knight’s headquarters. and like the first time, you flashed him a smile with those eyes and his mind went blank. you tug at his hand–his heart–ever so gently, urging him to have a picnic with you under the afternoon sun.

“you seem to really love using icarus in your poems.” albedo randomly mentioned, taking a bite of the adventurer’s sandwich you bought. you only hum and continue to write in your journal. against his better judgment, albedo leaned into your space, trying to take a peek of your newest piece, but you quickly shut the journal and stuck your tongue at him.

“peeking is rather rude y’know?” you jest and his chuckle ringed out. 

“pardon my rudeness,” he said. “i was simply curious.”

albedo was sure there was something swimming in his chest–fondness, most probably–as you flash him a knowing smile. you take out something from your bag, a crown made out of cecilias and windwheel asters, and place it on the crown of his head, leaving him with a quiet but undeniable joy that he couldn’t quite name.

“i see myself as icarus, that’s my answer.”

“how so?” he asked, mindlessly flipped through his sketchbook and felt a growing smile tug at his lips when he saw your handwriting in the corners of a few pages. 

you don’t answer–you never do– but albedo never minded. he liked it whenever you left him guessing. for the rest of the afternoon, you both spend your time in each other’s presence as you eat your food. you talked about the new book lisa had given you to read in your spare time and he asked you what colors he should use on his next painting. “yellow because they remind me of you.” would always be your reply and he’d comply.

by the time he waved you goodbye and sat back down in his office, there was another letter pressed in his sketchbook. he could already feel his heart racing as he reached for it.

“to my dearest, albedo

you seem to really ponder over the last verse of my poem when i first arrived in mondstatd. i must say, i feel honored that i made your mind tick with curiosity. i found myself gravitating towards your presence more and more after you asked me if i could be the subject of your painting. that was the first time i’ve ever been the muse to someone’s creation. it sent my heart into a giddy fit you know. you are no poet, as i am no painter; i cannot paint the image i have of you on a canvas, but i can put my affections into words. after all, the verse ‘why does icarus continue to fly despite his impending doom.’ was always meant for you—to capture your attention.”

albedo sat down on his chair, a gloved covering half of his face to hide the pathetically infatuated smile on his face. he took out the second letter from the envelope, bracing his heart to whatever emotion you would stir inside him.

“like icarus, i found myself

flying straight into the pools of his eyes

with my wings made of wax, 

i soared straight into his guarded heart

and let his burning affections scorch me and melt my wings.

then i fell—or so i thought

my body did not meet the ground harshly,

for he caught me,

in all the gentleness known to mankind, 

he treated my scorched skin with care.

i was icarus and he is my sun,

with gold and glitter in all his glory.

icarus is a fool in love.

why does icarus continue to fly, despite his impending doom?

because the sun is icarus’s love.

in every lifetime, he will always choose to fall,

loving him despite it being too hot, too close.

icarus is a fool in love, for without the sun,

he would have no reason to live.

why would icarus fly if he had no sun to fly to?”

albedo’s eyes traced over the last line of your poem, his heart rattling with uncharacteristic tenderness and a gentle ache. your words had breathed life to the emotions he never knew he was capable of feeling.

he looked down on his sketchbook, then out the window to gaze at the setting sun. the warmth reminding him of your love for icarus—him. he was no poet, but for you, he could perhaps become one.

with careful hands like you described in your poem, he folded the parchment and placed it gently into his sketchbook, right beside the finished sketch of you under the afternoon sun, cecilias blooming right under your feet. a small smile tugged at his lips as he picked up his pencil.

for the first time in a long while, albedo finally understood what it meant to be inspired.

© vxnuslogy 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, or translate any of my works without my knowledge or consent in other platforms or websites.

⟡ ──⠀ cooking headcanons.

⟡ ⠀ honkai: star rail.

⟡ ⠀ summary. :: how good are the cooking skills of the members of the astral express members? ⟡ ⠀ character(s). :: Dan Heng, March 7th, Himeko, Welt Yang ⟡ ⠀ warnings. :: sfw, comedy, general headcanons ⟡ ⠀ word count. :: —

⟡ ⠀ Himeko - about cooking. ::

I wouldn't centrainly say I'm good at cooking, but I can always brew you some coffee if you want to.

• she can do the most basic things, like boiling eggs or pasta to your liking, but nothing more.

• she should improve her coffee first.

• but she wouldn't burn down the kitchen (like some other people March 7th)

• her food is tasting plain, not a single drop of any seasoning can be found in her food and it’s dry it’s like a sponge.

• depending on the food, it can happen to be burned at the bottom and edges, but it can be eaten.

• it's neither suspicious nor special.

• overall she gets a 3.5/10.

⟡ ⠀ Welt Yang - about cooking. ::

most of the time, I'm the one cooking for the express. exept for Dan Heng... let's not talk about it...

• best cook of the express.

• he can cook almost everything, if he has the recepie and a step by step instruction.

• it still happens sometimes that he burns something. but he can make something out of it.

• overall, a solid 9/10.

⟡ ⠀ Dan Heng - about cooking. ::

I'm not the best cook, but I can prepare you something if something should cross our path.

• decent cook.

• knows what he can cook and stays with that.

• he often hesitates when it comes to new dishes.

• he still nails it.

• his dishes taste as they should and are not obersalted.

• overall a 7/10.

⟡ ⠀ March 7th - about cooking. ::

cooking is fun! but the others say I should better not enter the kitchen. I don't know exactly what I'm doing wrong...

• she can't cook at all.

• and she shouldn't be allowed to enter the kitchen.

• she would burn down the kitchen and then the whole express.

• her food is unbeatable. stay away from it.

• at least she tries. at least she wants to try.

• 1/10 for that.

──⠀ lovs monologue

repost time! I also edited some parts bc the formulation was a little dumb.

© lovingluxury | @/cafekitsune’s dividers

⟡ ──⠀ when the thunder strikes.

⟡ ⠀ genshin impact.

⟡ ⠀ summary. :: seeming his partner sleeping on him reminded Wriothesley of a saying he was told once. ⟡ ⠀ pairing(s). :: Wriothesley x gn!Reader ⟡ ⠀ warnings. :: sfw, fluff, comfort ⟡ ⠀ word count. :: 244

it was rare for Wriothesley to be home by afternoon. no new prisoners. no documents. Neuivilette was even so nice to send someone down to replace him for the day. he was really grateful for that, but how should he make himself a nice day if his partner was taking a nap on him? and you also had the audacity to snore. loud even.

his gaze wandered out of the window, watching dark, heavy clouds roaming over the sky. the feeling of rain coming soon didn’t want to leave his chest, lingering heavily on the body of the warden. and to his expectations, heavy rain started to fall onto the ground followed by a thunder shortly after. followed by another. and a lightning.

the thunders and rain didn’t stop for a long time. his gaze didn’t leave you during that time. many people would get scared when thunders started crashing on the ground. but not you. you still slept, not being bothered at all. a sign of your heart and soul being at peace with each other. then, a saying crossed his mind. people are scared of the thunder because they have some to hide. this left him wonder. how would you react if you would be awake?

would you stay calm or get scared? he looked out for one last time, watching the heavy rain drops pounding against the window, blurring the scenery outside completely, before he tried to fall asleep for himself.

──⠀ lovs monologue

repost time! I changed the end a little to be more to my liking.

I got inspired by the german translation of Wriothesleys voice line ‘when thunder strikes’ to write this.

© lovingluxury | @/cafekitsune’s dividers

⟡ ──⠀ when the thunder strikes.

⟡ ⠀ genshin impact.

⟡ ⠀ summary. :: seeming his partner sleeping on him reminded Wriothesley of a saying he was told once. ⟡ ⠀ pairing(s). :: Wriothesley x gn!Reader ⟡ ⠀ warnings. :: sfw, fluff, comfort ⟡ ⠀ word count. :: 244

it was rare for Wriothesley to be home by afternoon. no new prisoners. no documents. Neuivilette was even so nice to send someone down to replace him for the day. he was really grateful for that, but how should he make himself a nice day if his partner was taking a nap on him? and you also had the audacity to snore. loud even.

his gaze wandered out of the window, watching dark, heavy clouds roaming over the sky. the feeling of rain coming soon didn’t want to leave his chest, lingering heavily on the body of the warden. and to his expectations, heavy rain started to fall onto the ground followed by a thunder shortly after. followed by another. and a lightning.

the thunders and rain didn’t stop for a long time. his gaze didn’t leave you during that time. many people would get scared when thunders started crashing on the ground. but not you. you still slept, not being bothered at all. a sign of your heart and soul being at peace with each other. then, a saying crossed his mind. people are scared of the thunder because they have some to hide. this left him wonder. how would you react if you would be awake?

would you stay calm or get scared? he looked out for one last time, watching the heavy rain drops pounding against the window, blurring the scenery outside completely, before he tried to fall asleep for himself.

──⠀ lovs monologue

repost time! I changed the end a little to be more to my liking.

I got inspired by the german translation of Wriothesleys voice line ‘when thunder strikes’ to write this.

© lovingluxury | @/cafekitsune’s dividers