Confessional Poetry - Tumblr Posts

i hope that some day they will enjoy my words.

some days i am overflowing with love and can do nothing but write of it. i draft these love letters with the most cliche of prose and long for you to read it.

when you insult your body you insult my own for so many call me a reflection of you.

i am a mirror of my mother.

whether we are together or not my attachment to you remains. you are dear to my heart and shall never quite leave it. ill love you tomorrow and every day after that.

i want nothing but beauty to spill onto this page yet i cannot. i am no brilliant writer i am merely a girl.

i wrote you a letter. i do not think it was good.

i went to a bookstore

in search of the works of sylvia plath

through the shelves i sought her words

but i was met with nothing.

***

to her work

she dedicated her life

as well as her suffering

yet she is not given the basic respect

of being remembered

nothing could anger me more than that.

when i was a girl i did not know that there was anything wrong with my body. now i see the cracks.

high marks are a whole other hunger.

tired eyes with a screaming mind.

no one believes

in a sickness

that they cannot see.

i have always been too much. too loud too big too mean too kind too clever too stupid too much. everyone seems to agree.

i am finally feeling again.

i always feel so out of place i know its a classic teenage trope but i feel misunderstood i never seem to belong not even with my own flesh and blood. i do not know what is wrong with me although everyone else seems to know there is a fundamental difference that i cannot fix. sometimes i will come across someone just like me we spot one another and keep each other afloat perhaps we are the only ones that can the trouble is when they try to conform like the rest that is how they lose me for i cannot be like them and i know that others see it too. they know that i am different that there is something irreparably wrong.

people always think that i am faking it

something i had never considered

yet they seem to claim it regardless

i have thought of telling them otherwise

but they would never believe me.

i often mistake my relationships with others for genuine connection and feel that we are one and the same yet i still manage to be left behind i truly wish that i could pretend that i could be someone different but i cannot which is something that no one seems to understand to be someone else would be my salvation.

sometimes i feel like a flower searching for sunlight in the soil.

i feel that in every moment i am someone else refusing to stay consistent yet it remains not of my own volition. i cannot be myself for my body shall not let me.

how could you possibly

be so blind

to what you have done

to me?

***

how could i possibly

be so blond

to what you have done

for me?

lust is a sin that was once foreign to me but alas that is no longer the case and i damn you for it.