Kim Taehyung Imagine - Tumblr Posts

#3 All I Want Is A Break

Angsty cause this job hunting process is relentless. 

Y/N and Yoongi are best friends, then lovers, until he decides he wants to find out what life can be without her. 

Pairing: Yoongi x female reader + Taehung 

Genre: Non-IdolAU / Angst / Smut in the next part 

Warnings: Curse words/ heartache/ it’s quite angsty and will have smut if we continue. 

Word count: 3.8K+

Note: Picked up my old writing to give it something new. Let me know how you like it? 

—

It’s strange. I’m standing in front of him. I know him. I know this man inside out. Have you ever stood in front of someone you have known your entire life, but they suddenly felt like a stranger to you? I could hear him speaking, and he was not making sense to me. 

“Don’t you want to, maybe, see other people? Know how they are? Know how you’ll be with them? Will you be someone different, or will you be the same? I mean, you and I know each other inside out. But, we don’t know how anybody else is! We don’t know how great or, even worse, it might be if we are with other people. Don’t you ever feel like finding out?”

This was Yoongi, my Yoongi. My best friend since we were 7, boyfriend since - did it matter? He wanted to explore being with other people. 

“Think about it, Y/N,” He didn’t stop. “Jae and I were discussing this. How the different relationships change you, and how they make you grow? Have you never thought about this? Don’t look at me like that,” He rolled his eyes. 

He rolled his eyes as I stared, sitting in front of him, my brain trying to catch up and pre-empt his next dialogue. 

“It’s been too long? Don’t you feel so? We have always been together! Exploring, or even I don’t know, taking a break isn’t a bad idea. To just discover ourselves…” He took another sip of the beer he had poured for us. My glass remained untouched. His, refilled twice, was almost empty. 

This entire week had felt off. It felt like the music had changed, and I didn’t know the artist anymore. He went on. His life-changing discussion with our friends. Our friends? His friends. Life-changing decisions, all in the two dinners I missed. “It’s just a break. Nothing more,” His decision was made. When my boyfriend decided something, he went through with it. “We spend some time apart from each other. I’ll go live with Jae, and we can just explore and see life without each other in our lives. Just a small break,” He said so easily.

“You’re my best friend.” My first words as I tried to make sense of the situation. He had been my best friend since 7. We did everything together since we were 7. And, when we started dating, I needed no one else. 

“And you’re mine. But, listen to me,” he took my hands in his, pulling me out of my static stance, and shaking me up to see what was happening. “We need to know who we are, without each other too. I think it is healthy for me to want that. I’m not saying I want to break up. I just want a break from yo-” I pulled my hands away. “That’s not what I mean.” He realised he fucked up with the wrong words. Like he had not been fucking up till now. I knew him inside out. 

Maybe he could see the betrayal on my face or the tears welling up in my eyes. I was having an out-of-body experience. It felt like I could see myself breaking down, but that hurt hadn’t seeped in yet. “What I mean is, I just want to know life as a person of my own. Who I am without us being together cause we have been together was so long. I want to know, do I actually like apple pie, or do I like it because you like it? That discussion just had me thinking if I can be the best for you if I’m not my own person." 

"So, you’re basically saying that you don’t want me in your life anymore?” I frowned.

“Don’t be dramatic,” He sighed. 

I laughed. “That’s literally what you just said." 

"I don’t know why you aren’t getting this.” He raised his voice. “You know, Maria said you won’t get it, and you don’t.” he shook his head, and sat back. 

“Maria said that I won’t get it? You’ve known these people for a month. You’ve known me for years!” I couldn’t stop the tears. “But, it’s not about them. If you want to break up with me, have the fucking balls to do it. Don’t come at me with, ‘I don’t know who I am/ we have always been together.’ Straight up, tell me you don’t want me anymore.” I walked back towards our room so I could pack a duffle bag and get out of this apartment.

“That’s not it. I just want a break. We are in university, in a new environment. This is the perfect time for it. Y/N!” He shouted as I stuffed my clothes in a bag. “Where are you going? You don’t know anyone. We are literally just discussing,” He was technically right. All my friends were his friends. It had always been like that. Yoongi socialised, and I tagged along. It had been a month since we started uni, and even though our courses were different, we lived together, and I spent time hanging out with his friends more than I cared to make mine. 

“We aren’t, though. You are breaking up with me,” I collected my stuff from our shared dresser and quickly dumped my laptop and books in my backpack. I would have to come back and collect my stuff, but this should hold me for a few days. 

“It’s a break!” He yelled. “You’re still my best friend! You’ll always be my best friend,” He yelled as I tried to walk past him. “You’ll always have that place in my life. Where the hell are you going!?”

“But that’s it, right? You want this place gone.” I could see the confusion on his face. He hadn’t thought this through. “What does 'explore and see life without each other in our lives’ even mean? Do you want us to pretend we don’t know each other? So, you can have your experiment with how your life would be if we,” I gestured between us, “never existed? Tough luck. We did. And, you don’t erase the past. You move on." 

"I feel like I am talking to a wall, Y/N,” he said, exasperated. 

“What am I supposed to understand? That my boyfriend came home today after meeting his friends to tell me that he wants to take a break because he has been with me for far too long. What even is this reason? Thanks for being the cliche of the century. You want to see different things? Who is stopping you? But you want to explore what is out there and still hold on to me, in case you realise that being alone, maybe, isn’t for you. I’m not an option, Yoongi.” I dropped my bags to the ground so I could call myself a cab.

“It’s not about options at all. I just…you are twisting my words. I don’t want to make you feel like you’re an option but haven’t you ever felt the need to want something more?” He questioned. “That maybe there is something worth more out there?” His eyes were wide. He had misspoken again. 

It was like a knife running through my chest. I couldn’t believe this was my best friend. That this man in front of me was the love of my life, and he hadn’t just degraded me. “All the best. I hope you find what you are looking for. My cab is here.” I ran out, and he ran out after me, but he didn’t call. He didn’t call me at all. 

—

“He said WHAT?” Zoya and I were four shots down, and I could feel it all hit me at once. 

“He wants to find out if there is something worth more than us being together. He could have just said he wanted to be single and live the uni life. Like all fuckboys out here. What the fuck even is a break?” I was so drunk. 

“Man, I’m sorry. But this is good for you. I can feel it. I’m getting the vibes,” Zoya tickled the air. 

“You can feel the vibe?” I looked at her. 

“Yaaa, I caaaannnn!” She slurred. “It’ll be difficult. Very, but no time like now." 

"I gotta figure out my housing situation,” I threw my head down to the bar table. My bags were behind the bar, or Zoya had thrown them behind the bar cause the bartender was her friend. She was my friend here, and actually, she was my only new friend here. 

“It’s sorted. That’s why I brought you here! Tae! Tae!” She yelled, flailing her arms, catching the bartender’s eye. 

“Okay, Zoya, stay seated, or I will throw you out,” The bartender pulled her hands together and made her sit down. 

“Tae, you have an extra room, right?” She asked sweetly. 

“Uh, I do,” He said with caution, his eyes flickering between us two. 

“Great! You’re looking for a roommate. I have your roommate!” She declared happily.

“You want me to live with a boy?” I looked at her.

“I’m looking for a roommate?” He questioned as well. 

“Yes, you can’t live alone. You need company. And Y/N, Tae’s place is very, and I mean, very nice. He is the best option at this point in the semester. He technically owns this bar and works here for free because he likes mixology.” Zoya kept each hand on one of our shoulders like she was planning a plot. 

“My father owns this bar,” Tae clarified. 

“Potehto Potahto,” Zoya mumbled, taking a long sip of her long island iced tea. “So, Y/N will take that spare bedroom, and I will come party at your place 'cause it’ll finally be interesting!" 

"Zoya bu–” She kept her finger on my lips. 

“But, today we will go to mine 'cause I got some pork ribs that we have to try!” She jumped off and walked towards the exit without looking back. 

Tae helped me with my bags and told another person to take over for him, “Taehyung,” He offered his hand for me to shake. “Zoya and I are school friends. I’m studying management here too." 

"Y/N,” I smiled. “I’ve not seen you before, though!”

“It’s a big class of, like-what, 70 people? I don’t think we share any of our secondary courses, either. Do you share them with Zoya?” He asked, walking me outside. 

“Yes, Contemporary Issues in Competitive Strategy,” I told him. 

“I think I’m taking that next sem. Zoya, my car’s in the parking lot. Let’s go,” He called for her, and she happily ran towards us. 

—

“This is a big apartment. Are you sure you don’t mind me here? Zoya just kinda dumped it -” It was pretty well done as well. Only the room, which would be mine, just had a bed. 

“No, I think it’ll be fun. My father’s assistant has kinda overdone it. But, you can name a household appliance, and I think you’ll find it here,” He laughed. 

“Oh nice, what’s your rent?” I asked so I could decide if I could afford the division. The apartment Yoongi and I shared was a gift from his parents, so thankfully, we had just furnished it. I knew I’d need to rediscuss my finances, but I think I would be very comfortable if I got a part-time job. 

“I own this place. My father believes in buying, not renting,” He explained. “But, I’m sure we can agree on something,” He smiled. 

Moving in with Tae was easy. Zoya helped me pack my stuff the next day when I knew Yoongi would be out, and since he still had not called or dropped a text, I went in and got the rest of my personal stuff when he was in classes. Tae and I went shopping for furniture for my room and other utilities in the evening, and before I knew it, I had already moved into another house in all of one day. Two days before this, I was in bed with Yoongi as he told me some hilarious joke which was considered Architecture 101, and now I was in a completely different building, alone. 

“You haven’t moved,” Tae stood in front of my room. He had helped me unpack and set everything up with Zoya. “I left you right here, like 30 mins ago,” He laughed. I’m sure Zoya had him filled on my history and heartbreak. 

“Yoongi must have just gotten back to the apartment. Do you think he’ll call when he sees my stuff gone?” I asked Tae with tears in my eyes. 

Tae pouted and came and sat next to me, “if he calls, will you pick up?” He asked. I shook my head. “If he calls, will you feel better?” I shrugged because I didn’t know what to feel. It was all happening so fast. 

“I am apologizing in advance for not being an amazing roommate for the next few…my heart is breaking right now,” I couldn’t stop my tears. 

“Sleep. I promised you a welcome breakfast, so you need to be up for it,” Tae tried, nudging my shoulder. 

—

I kept out of Yoongi’s way. It was great that our majors were different, and our classes were on the opposite side of the campus. In a week, I found a routine that didn’t collide with his at all. If I saw him at the coffee house, I hid. If I saw him on the way to the library, I went the opposite direction. 

'I hope you’re okay.' 

The last text from him was three days old. Did he know where I was? Who was I with? Was I okay? 

I kept my word, and I disappeared from his life. It was killing me. How do you get rid of a habit? I woke up in sweats. I couldn’t breathe, my chest contracting within itself at the thought of him. The only time I ate was when Tae and Zoya were around, and our routine was extremely hectic.

A month into it, the pain sort of became a habit. My course and my internship did not leave me any time to think. When I did catch a moment, it was spent laughing with Taehyung, who was an incredible roommate. We made friends in our course, so we had a group ready for adventure as the weekend hit, and I was kind of glad that I had no time to process anything because the day always started with me standing in front of the mirror, prepping myself to be happy and confident. It didn’t matter that the love of my life didn’t think I was enough. I was enough for me. I grew up in a loveless household; I knew what it felt like. But, by the evening, I was just numb. 

There had been no contact with Yoongi. And Ava, a new friend of mine, taught me tricks to cope and distract myself. “If you’re not ready to process it, you don’t have too,” She had been in therapy for the longest time, and always had words of wisdom. 

Yoongi was all over the place. There were photos all over the insta. 

'Finally single' was a caption on his friend Zack’s post, and I had lost a whole day on it. I realised that during the initial month of uni, I had not made any friends. All I had were his friends, and what it felt like was that they just tolerated me. Even the ones I had truly connected with did not text me after, and it had me really looking back on all my friendships through the years. I always connected through Yoongi. I always only really needed him, He was truly my confidant, my best friend, and I didn’t have the need for more. 

I was made strong, though. It has been two months, so it clearly wasn’t a short break. I finally told my parents and made them promise they wouldn’t say anything to Yoongi’s parents if it didn’t come from them and that they won’t contact him. 

'All I need is myself’ was his insta post with a picture of a glass of whisky held against the view of the sunset.

—

“Have you spoken to her since?” Tara asked Yoongi as he fiddled with his drink. 

“No,” He took another gulp. No indication was needed on who was being mentioned.

“How are you holding up?” She asked. She liked Y/N. She liked them together. She didn’t really agree with the narrative Jae and Sara had built up. But Jae didn’t understand relationships, and Sara had the hots for Yoongi. 

“It’s only a break. I just need to know who I am,” He said, more to himself. The last two months had been so strange. He was so angry at first. His girlfriend refused to understand his point of view, decided they were broken up like she decided on most things on her own, and had moved out all in one day. She came when he wasn’t in the house and packed her stuff, leaving the key on the kitchen table with no note. He was furious. 

Then, he found out she had moved in with another guy who she had never mentioned before. Did he even know her? Taking a break was making more sense. She didn’t respond to his message, hid from him or changed directions if he was around. She was his best friend. He knew he had asked for this, but not like this. He honestly thought if they spent a little time apart, it would bring them closer and give him clarity as well. 

His parents were talking about marriage, and they had just started uni. From living with his parents, he started living with Y/N, and he was excited until he had this whole conversation about how life can be different. And, he wanted the chance to at least to understand what it could be to be able to decide if he even wanted it. Wasn’t being young all about this? He missed his best friend. He missed Y/N every night he walked into their apartment, and he started spending the least amount of time in it, sleeping on the couch instead of their bed or Jae’s spare bedroom to save himself from thinking too much. 

“You can also find out who you are with her, you know. Jae isn’t exactly right, and he was always jealous of what you had with -” She was cut off as Jae jumped on Yoongi. 

“My man!” He yelled in his year. “We gotta get you laid this evening! Fuck I gotta get laid!" 

—

"Fuck, why have they given us a week off? I have five papers to write!” Tae screamed as he entered the apartment. 

“I got three papers and two presentations,” I counted. “You have to be my dummy for prep. Presentations freak me out.” I told him. Taehyung had a habit of shedding his clothes as soon as he entered the apartment. At this point, it was weird if he was in more than one layer inside the flat. I was sure I would not have been standing if I didn’t have him around. 

“I think we should go clubbing today. Go clubbing today, work tomorrow if we are not hungover, then hike the day after, and then we can relax and get to our assignments.” He wrote down our plan of action on the big whiteboard wall that he and Miles, our newly formed friend from the bar, had drunk installed one night. 

“Yuck. I hate clubs,” I groaned. 

“Wear your sexiest dress. I should be drooling,” He instructed. 

“Yuck." 

Miles was studying architecture like Yoongi. He actually knew me, having crossed paths during one of the many meetups I had accompanied Yoongi too. "I can give you goss on the enemy side,” he had offered as he sat next to me on the bar stool. Tae was experimenting with a new mix, and I was his taste tester, and also a bit tipsy from all the alcohol I was testing. 

“What’s the goss?” I asked. 

“Are you ready? Emotionally?” Miles asked, giving me a warning. 

“Sure,” I laughed.

“That group is way, way more boring now that you are not there!" 

I giggled, "you’re very sweet, Miles. The last I remember of you was that you didn’t speak a word after I told my cliff-jumping story!" 

"The cliff-jumping story was hilarious! I fell a little bit in love with you,” He said, making me choke on my drink. “I’m joking!” He laughed. “You’ll have to tell me a couple more to have me!" 

He was the perfect fit for our little group and assured me that I could stand without Yoongi. 

"I can’t believe you’re taking me clubbing tonight,” Miles groaned as he met us downstairs.“ Ava cancelled. I think we should run away, too,” He held my hand, flirting. 

“You guys are the worst!” Tae whined. “We are young, and hot, and dancing is the way to get laid. Please let’s just go!" 

"I’m surprised you want to get laid when Zoya is going to be there,” I took his arm, and wrapped mine around it.

“Till the time she sees that I am her true love, I need to get by,” He pouted. Tae was quite infatuated with Zoya, and Zoya had no clue. She thought he was fond, and they had been buddies through school. He didn’t want to change their dynamic and was hoping she’ll suddenly realise he had been there all along. 

“There is nothing like true love,” I said. 

“Hush,” He pulled me closer. “Let me dream." 

We were greeted inside the club by Zoya, who, in no time, had already poured three shots down our throats. I hadn’t eaten much, so the alcohol hit me faster and stronger. "You look so fucking sexy,” Zoya whispered as she twirled me around. I had lost weight in the last two months, so I felt less beautiful cause I wasn’t as healthy and fit as I kept myself, but I couldn’t help smiling big as she complimented me. 

We were closer to the dancing area, so I looked around for a place we could take up and keep our bags when I saw him. My smile disappeared, and my body went cold. It felt like a deep wound had ripped open again, and I was bleeding. 

“What happened-” Zoya’s eyes followed mine to see Yoongi on the first floor, his arms around the waist of a girl stuck to his body as they laughed. 

—

Umm, part 2? I’ll save Yoongi, don’t you worry! 

A friend of mine went through something similar, and it got me thinking of how people look at relationships. 

©mymuseagustd@2023

#3 All I Want Is A Break

Angsty cause this job hunting process is relentless. 

Y/N and Yoongi are best friends, then lovers, until he decides he wants to find out what life can be without her. 

Pairing: Yoongi x female reader + Taehung 

Genre: Non-IdolAU / Angst / Smut in the next part 

Warnings: Curse words/ heartache/ it’s quite angsty and will have smut if we continue. 

Word count: 3.8K+

Note: Picked up my old writing to give it something new. Let me know how you like it? 

—

It’s strange. I’m standing in front of him. I know him. I know this man inside out. Have you ever stood in front of someone you have known your entire life, but they suddenly felt like a stranger to you? I could hear him speaking, and he was not making sense to me. 

“Don’t you want to, maybe, see other people? Know how they are? Know how you’ll be with them? Will you be someone different, or will you be the same? I mean, you and I know each other inside out. But, we don’t know how anybody else is! We don’t know how great or, even worse, it might be if we are with other people. Don’t you ever feel like finding out?”

This was Yoongi, my Yoongi. My best friend since we were 7, boyfriend since - did it matter? He wanted to explore being with other people. 

“Think about it, Y/N,” He didn’t stop. “Jae and I were discussing this. How the different relationships change you, and how they make you grow? Have you never thought about this? Don’t look at me like that,” He rolled his eyes. 

He rolled his eyes as I stared, sitting in front of him, my brain trying to catch up and pre-empt his next dialogue. 

“It’s been too long? Don’t you feel so? We have always been together! Exploring, or even I don’t know, taking a break isn’t a bad idea. To just discover ourselves…” He took another sip of the beer he had poured for us. My glass remained untouched. His, refilled twice, was almost empty. 

This entire week had felt off. It felt like the music had changed, and I didn’t know the artist anymore. He went on. His life-changing discussion with our friends. Our friends? His friends. Life-changing decisions, all in the two dinners I missed. “It’s just a break. Nothing more,” His decision was made. When my boyfriend decided something, he went through with it. “We spend some time apart from each other. I’ll go live with Jae, and we can just explore and see life without each other in our lives. Just a small break,” He said so easily.

“You’re my best friend.” My first words as I tried to make sense of the situation. He had been my best friend since 7. We did everything together since we were 7. And, when we started dating, I needed no one else. 

“And you’re mine. But, listen to me,” he took my hands in his, pulling me out of my static stance, and shaking me up to see what was happening. “We need to know who we are, without each other too. I think it is healthy for me to want that. I’m not saying I want to break up. I just want a break from yo-” I pulled my hands away. “That’s not what I mean.” He realised he fucked up with the wrong words. Like he had not been fucking up till now. I knew him inside out. 

Maybe he could see the betrayal on my face or the tears welling up in my eyes. I was having an out-of-body experience. It felt like I could see myself breaking down, but that hurt hadn’t seeped in yet. “What I mean is, I just want to know life as a person of my own. Who I am without us being together cause we have been together was so long. I want to know, do I actually like apple pie, or do I like it because you like it? That discussion just had me thinking if I can be the best for you if I’m not my own person." 

"So, you’re basically saying that you don’t want me in your life anymore?” I frowned.

“Don’t be dramatic,” He sighed. 

I laughed. “That’s literally what you just said." 

"I don’t know why you aren’t getting this.” He raised his voice. “You know, Maria said you won’t get it, and you don’t.” he shook his head, and sat back. 

“Maria said that I won’t get it? You’ve known these people for a month. You’ve known me for years!” I couldn’t stop the tears. “But, it’s not about them. If you want to break up with me, have the fucking balls to do it. Don’t come at me with, ‘I don’t know who I am/ we have always been together.’ Straight up, tell me you don’t want me anymore.” I walked back towards our room so I could pack a duffle bag and get out of this apartment.

“That’s not it. I just want a break. We are in university, in a new environment. This is the perfect time for it. Y/N!” He shouted as I stuffed my clothes in a bag. “Where are you going? You don’t know anyone. We are literally just discussing,” He was technically right. All my friends were his friends. It had always been like that. Yoongi socialised, and I tagged along. It had been a month since we started uni, and even though our courses were different, we lived together, and I spent time hanging out with his friends more than I cared to make mine. 

“We aren’t, though. You are breaking up with me,” I collected my stuff from our shared dresser and quickly dumped my laptop and books in my backpack. I would have to come back and collect my stuff, but this should hold me for a few days. 

“It’s a break!” He yelled. “You’re still my best friend! You’ll always be my best friend,” He yelled as I tried to walk past him. “You’ll always have that place in my life. Where the hell are you going!?”

“But that’s it, right? You want this place gone.” I could see the confusion on his face. He hadn’t thought this through. “What does 'explore and see life without each other in our lives’ even mean? Do you want us to pretend we don’t know each other? So, you can have your experiment with how your life would be if we,” I gestured between us, “never existed? Tough luck. We did. And, you don’t erase the past. You move on." 

"I feel like I am talking to a wall, Y/N,” he said, exasperated. 

“What am I supposed to understand? That my boyfriend came home today after meeting his friends to tell me that he wants to take a break because he has been with me for far too long. What even is this reason? Thanks for being the cliche of the century. You want to see different things? Who is stopping you? But you want to explore what is out there and still hold on to me, in case you realise that being alone, maybe, isn’t for you. I’m not an option, Yoongi.” I dropped my bags to the ground so I could call myself a cab.

“It’s not about options at all. I just…you are twisting my words. I don’t want to make you feel like you’re an option but haven’t you ever felt the need to want something more?” He questioned. “That maybe there is something worth more out there?” His eyes were wide. He had misspoken again. 

It was like a knife running through my chest. I couldn’t believe this was my best friend. That this man in front of me was the love of my life, and he hadn’t just degraded me. “All the best. I hope you find what you are looking for. My cab is here.” I ran out, and he ran out after me, but he didn’t call. He didn’t call me at all. 

—

“He said WHAT?” Zoya and I were four shots down, and I could feel it all hit me at once. 

“He wants to find out if there is something worth more than us being together. He could have just said he wanted to be single and live the uni life. Like all fuckboys out here. What the fuck even is a break?” I was so drunk. 

“Man, I’m sorry. But this is good for you. I can feel it. I’m getting the vibes,” Zoya tickled the air. 

“You can feel the vibe?” I looked at her. 

“Yaaa, I caaaannnn!” She slurred. “It’ll be difficult. Very, but no time like now." 

"I gotta figure out my housing situation,” I threw my head down to the bar table. My bags were behind the bar, or Zoya had thrown them behind the bar cause the bartender was her friend. She was my friend here, and actually, she was my only new friend here. 

“It’s sorted. That’s why I brought you here! Tae! Tae!” She yelled, flailing her arms, catching the bartender’s eye. 

“Okay, Zoya, stay seated, or I will throw you out,” The bartender pulled her hands together and made her sit down. 

“Tae, you have an extra room, right?” She asked sweetly. 

“Uh, I do,” He said with caution, his eyes flickering between us two. 

“Great! You’re looking for a roommate. I have your roommate!” She declared happily.

“You want me to live with a boy?” I looked at her.

“I’m looking for a roommate?” He questioned as well. 

“Yes, you can’t live alone. You need company. And Y/N, Tae’s place is very, and I mean, very nice. He is the best option at this point in the semester. He technically owns this bar and works here for free because he likes mixology.” Zoya kept each hand on one of our shoulders like she was planning a plot. 

“My father owns this bar,” Tae clarified. 

“Potehto Potahto,” Zoya mumbled, taking a long sip of her long island iced tea. “So, Y/N will take that spare bedroom, and I will come party at your place 'cause it’ll finally be interesting!" 

"Zoya bu–” She kept her finger on my lips. 

“But, today we will go to mine 'cause I got some pork ribs that we have to try!” She jumped off and walked towards the exit without looking back. 

Tae helped me with my bags and told another person to take over for him, “Taehyung,” He offered his hand for me to shake. “Zoya and I are school friends. I’m studying management here too." 

"Y/N,” I smiled. “I’ve not seen you before, though!”

“It’s a big class of, like-what, 70 people? I don’t think we share any of our secondary courses, either. Do you share them with Zoya?” He asked, walking me outside. 

“Yes, Contemporary Issues in Competitive Strategy,” I told him. 

“I think I’m taking that next sem. Zoya, my car’s in the parking lot. Let’s go,” He called for her, and she happily ran towards us. 

—

“This is a big apartment. Are you sure you don’t mind me here? Zoya just kinda dumped it -” It was pretty well done as well. Only the room, which would be mine, just had a bed. 

“No, I think it’ll be fun. My father’s assistant has kinda overdone it. But, you can name a household appliance, and I think you’ll find it here,” He laughed. 

“Oh nice, what’s your rent?” I asked so I could decide if I could afford the division. The apartment Yoongi and I shared was a gift from his parents, so thankfully, we had just furnished it. I knew I’d need to rediscuss my finances, but I think I would be very comfortable if I got a part-time job. 

“I own this place. My father believes in buying, not renting,” He explained. “But, I’m sure we can agree on something,” He smiled. 

Moving in with Tae was easy. Zoya helped me pack my stuff the next day when I knew Yoongi would be out, and since he still had not called or dropped a text, I went in and got the rest of my personal stuff when he was in classes. Tae and I went shopping for furniture for my room and other utilities in the evening, and before I knew it, I had already moved into another house in all of one day. Two days before this, I was in bed with Yoongi as he told me some hilarious joke which was considered Architecture 101, and now I was in a completely different building, alone. 

“You haven’t moved,” Tae stood in front of my room. He had helped me unpack and set everything up with Zoya. “I left you right here, like 30 mins ago,” He laughed. I’m sure Zoya had him filled on my history and heartbreak. 

“Yoongi must have just gotten back to the apartment. Do you think he’ll call when he sees my stuff gone?” I asked Tae with tears in my eyes. 

Tae pouted and came and sat next to me, “if he calls, will you pick up?” He asked. I shook my head. “If he calls, will you feel better?” I shrugged because I didn’t know what to feel. It was all happening so fast. 

“I am apologizing in advance for not being an amazing roommate for the next few…my heart is breaking right now,” I couldn’t stop my tears. 

“Sleep. I promised you a welcome breakfast, so you need to be up for it,” Tae tried, nudging my shoulder. 

—

I kept out of Yoongi’s way. It was great that our majors were different, and our classes were on the opposite side of the campus. In a week, I found a routine that didn’t collide with his at all. If I saw him at the coffee house, I hid. If I saw him on the way to the library, I went the opposite direction. 

'I hope you’re okay.' 

The last text from him was three days old. Did he know where I was? Who was I with? Was I okay? 

I kept my word, and I disappeared from his life. It was killing me. How do you get rid of a habit? I woke up in sweats. I couldn’t breathe, my chest contracting within itself at the thought of him. The only time I ate was when Tae and Zoya were around, and our routine was extremely hectic.

A month into it, the pain sort of became a habit. My course and my internship did not leave me any time to think. When I did catch a moment, it was spent laughing with Taehyung, who was an incredible roommate. We made friends in our course, so we had a group ready for adventure as the weekend hit, and I was kind of glad that I had no time to process anything because the day always started with me standing in front of the mirror, prepping myself to be happy and confident. It didn’t matter that the love of my life didn’t think I was enough. I was enough for me. I grew up in a loveless household; I knew what it felt like. But, by the evening, I was just numb. 

There had been no contact with Yoongi. And Ava, a new friend of mine, taught me tricks to cope and distract myself. “If you’re not ready to process it, you don’t have too,” She had been in therapy for the longest time, and always had words of wisdom. 

Yoongi was all over the place. There were photos all over the insta. 

'Finally single' was a caption on his friend Zack’s post, and I had lost a whole day on it. I realised that during the initial month of uni, I had not made any friends. All I had were his friends, and what it felt like was that they just tolerated me. Even the ones I had truly connected with did not text me after, and it had me really looking back on all my friendships through the years. I always connected through Yoongi. I always only really needed him, He was truly my confidant, my best friend, and I didn’t have the need for more. 

I was made strong, though. It has been two months, so it clearly wasn’t a short break. I finally told my parents and made them promise they wouldn’t say anything to Yoongi’s parents if it didn’t come from them and that they won’t contact him. 

'All I need is myself’ was his insta post with a picture of a glass of whisky held against the view of the sunset.

—

“Have you spoken to her since?” Tara asked Yoongi as he fiddled with his drink. 

“No,” He took another gulp. No indication was needed on who was being mentioned.

“How are you holding up?” She asked. She liked Y/N. She liked them together. She didn’t really agree with the narrative Jae and Sara had built up. But Jae didn’t understand relationships, and Sara had the hots for Yoongi. 

“It’s only a break. I just need to know who I am,” He said, more to himself. The last two months had been so strange. He was so angry at first. His girlfriend refused to understand his point of view, decided they were broken up like she decided on most things on her own, and had moved out all in one day. She came when he wasn’t in the house and packed her stuff, leaving the key on the kitchen table with no note. He was furious. 

Then, he found out she had moved in with another guy who she had never mentioned before. Did he even know her? Taking a break was making more sense. She didn’t respond to his message, hid from him or changed directions if he was around. She was his best friend. He knew he had asked for this, but not like this. He honestly thought if they spent a little time apart, it would bring them closer and give him clarity as well. 

His parents were talking about marriage, and they had just started uni. From living with his parents, he started living with Y/N, and he was excited until he had this whole conversation about how life can be different. And, he wanted the chance to at least to understand what it could be to be able to decide if he even wanted it. Wasn’t being young all about this? He missed his best friend. He missed Y/N every night he walked into their apartment, and he started spending the least amount of time in it, sleeping on the couch instead of their bed or Jae’s spare bedroom to save himself from thinking too much. 

“You can also find out who you are with her, you know. Jae isn’t exactly right, and he was always jealous of what you had with -” She was cut off as Jae jumped on Yoongi. 

“My man!” He yelled in his year. “We gotta get you laid this evening! Fuck I gotta get laid!" 

—

"Fuck, why have they given us a week off? I have five papers to write!” Tae screamed as he entered the apartment. 

“I got three papers and two presentations,” I counted. “You have to be my dummy for prep. Presentations freak me out.” I told him. Taehyung had a habit of shedding his clothes as soon as he entered the apartment. At this point, it was weird if he was in more than one layer inside the flat. I was sure I would not have been standing if I didn’t have him around. 

“I think we should go clubbing today. Go clubbing today, work tomorrow if we are not hungover, then hike the day after, and then we can relax and get to our assignments.” He wrote down our plan of action on the big whiteboard wall that he and Miles, our newly formed friend from the bar, had drunk installed one night. 

“Yuck. I hate clubs,” I groaned. 

“Wear your sexiest dress. I should be drooling,” He instructed. 

“Yuck." 

Miles was studying architecture like Yoongi. He actually knew me, having crossed paths during one of the many meetups I had accompanied Yoongi too. "I can give you goss on the enemy side,” he had offered as he sat next to me on the bar stool. Tae was experimenting with a new mix, and I was his taste tester, and also a bit tipsy from all the alcohol I was testing. 

“What’s the goss?” I asked. 

“Are you ready? Emotionally?” Miles asked, giving me a warning. 

“Sure,” I laughed.

“That group is way, way more boring now that you are not there!" 

I giggled, "you’re very sweet, Miles. The last I remember of you was that you didn’t speak a word after I told my cliff-jumping story!" 

"The cliff-jumping story was hilarious! I fell a little bit in love with you,” He said, making me choke on my drink. “I’m joking!” He laughed. “You’ll have to tell me a couple more to have me!" 

He was the perfect fit for our little group and assured me that I could stand without Yoongi. 

"I can’t believe you’re taking me clubbing tonight,” Miles groaned as he met us downstairs.“ Ava cancelled. I think we should run away, too,” He held my hand, flirting. 

“You guys are the worst!” Tae whined. “We are young, and hot, and dancing is the way to get laid. Please let’s just go!" 

"I’m surprised you want to get laid when Zoya is going to be there,” I took his arm, and wrapped mine around it.

“Till the time she sees that I am her true love, I need to get by,” He pouted. Tae was quite infatuated with Zoya, and Zoya had no clue. She thought he was fond, and they had been buddies through school. He didn’t want to change their dynamic and was hoping she’ll suddenly realise he had been there all along. 

“There is nothing like true love,” I said. 

“Hush,” He pulled me closer. “Let me dream." 

We were greeted inside the club by Zoya, who, in no time, had already poured three shots down our throats. I hadn’t eaten much, so the alcohol hit me faster and stronger. "You look so fucking sexy,” Zoya whispered as she twirled me around. I had lost weight in the last two months, so I felt less beautiful cause I wasn’t as healthy and fit as I kept myself, but I couldn’t help smiling big as she complimented me. 

We were closer to the dancing area, so I looked around for a place we could take up and keep our bags when I saw him. My smile disappeared, and my body went cold. It felt like a deep wound had ripped open again, and I was bleeding. 

“What happened-” Zoya’s eyes followed mine to see Yoongi on the first floor, his arms around the waist of a girl stuck to his body as they laughed. 

—

Umm, part 2? I’ll save Yoongi, don’t you worry! 

A friend of mine went through something similar, and it got me thinking of how people look at relationships. 

©mymuseagustd@2023

#3 All I Want Is A Break (Part 2)

Y/N and Yoongi are best friends, then lovers, until he decides he wants to find out what life can be without her.

Pairing: Yoongi x female reader + Taehung and Jungkook

Genre: Non-IdolAU / Angst / Smut 

Warnings: Curse words/ heartache/ Smut

Word count: 3.5K+

PART 1

—

“Baby…” Yoongi’s lips were going down my neck, but it was his voice that was pulling me in more. I was sure it was just his voice that could get me off. We hadn’t ever tried it, but I was sure if it ever came to the point where only his voice was available, I would still be all set. “Stop dreaming about me when I’m next to you,” He bit my chin lightly, pulling me out of my trance.

“Don’t call me baby,” I slid my hands down his body and groped his still-covered cock when he had me stripped instantly.

“But, you’re my baby,” He pouted, pushing his lips out. “How will people know you’re mine?” his fingers moved in and out of me like they had known their way around my body since forever. They had, and it felt nice to belong to someone. I had seen a house where love was always transactional. With Yoongi, nothing ever was. He always gave, was always patient, and I was so in love with him.

“Okay, you can call me baby. Make sure it’s always loud and clear,” I pushed him down the bed, so I could get him out of his tight jeans and show him my true devotion to him. “Make everyone hear you, so they know who you belong to as well,”

“Baby…” He moaned, his hands pulling my hair together, as I wrapped my tongue around him, “Baby….”

“BABY!”

My head jerked and hit my bedside table.

“BABY!” Taehyung was yelling from the kitchen, his favourite thing to do when he took up cooking which was very often. I sat up straight and looked around my room. I was spending too much time in it. The sweat on my neck couldn’t really confirm my emotion behind the kind of dream I was having, but my body was very frustrated. This was the longest I had gone without any action, and with the accumulating stress, the last two months had not been easy.

“BABY, BABY, BABY!” Tae sang/shouted again.

“Don’t call me baby.” I groaned, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a bottle of water.

“Finally! You’re up! You’ve been sleeping all morning, and I’m making fajitas,” He was awfully chirpy for 2 PM.

“My body is too pent up. I think I need to take some dancing classes to get it moving cause the gym is making it worse,” I sat down on the counter, treating myself to some sour cream with some leftover chips.

“I think you need to get fucked,” Tae said nonchalantly.

I paused, “you think I should go ask Yoongi for some? We didn’t really discuss this break…”

“No, you broke up with him. It was evident he has moved on when we all saw him at the club. You need someone new,” I gulped as Tae spoke. He realised my discomfort, “Look, Y/N, I’m not going to lie to you and make it sound like it is better than what’s reality. I hate seeing you like this, though. And we have discussed this. His asking for a break was unfair. And, even though you have painted an amazing picture of him for us, he is still not out that door asking you back.”

“I know, I know,” I nodded. We had discussed this a lot. “I just am not ready for a relationship.”

“Relationship? No one is recommending that. No, you have been with one guy your entire life! And healing that scar will need a lot of therapy which, by the way, congratulations for starting, but there are one-night stands, rendezvous, situationships waiting to be explored. Please don’t get a boyfriend, get a fuck-friend.”

“Ooooh, like Nadia…” I smirked. Nadia was very interested in learning the ins and outs of the course she was sharing with Tae and was not against studying the ins and outs of Tae. The poor girl was infatuated with him, and Tae was playing the classic fuckbuddy.

“Yeah, exactly like Nadia!” This poor boy was so clueless.

“Okay, I will let you know when I am ready for a rendezvous, is it?” I said, disgusted. “Gross, what is wrong with you?” I walked off.

“It’s what it’s called!” He laughed.

—

“Jae, I really don’t want to meet anyone new. Trust me!” Yoongi wanted to clarify, but Jae was too excited to meet the girls he had met at his internship. Yoongi repeated it twice in the car and then at the club, but Jae was not receptive.

“Tia! Hey baby! Here lemme introduce you to my friend, Yoongi!” Tia was a design major from the same university, and even though she was lovely and sexy in the little black dress she wore, Yoongi was not interested. He wasn’t rude, though, so he introduced himself and kept talking to her through the night.

They were laughing about something insignificant when Maria came up wanting to take pictures. Yoongi instinctively put his arms around her, stopping her from falling as he made her laugh again. The pictures were clicked, and Tia tightened his arm around her, bringing herself closer. Yoongi was a bit surprised. It wasn’t like he wasn’t offered chances to be with other women, but no one had been that forward. Usually, Y/N was with him, so the territories were always established, more by him for her, than for himself. Y/N, she was..is gorgeous, he thought. She could light up a party just by walking into it. Made everyone feel included, except when she was nervous, like she had been with his new friends, and that’s when she kept herself very close to him. He liked how she fit into his body like she was just made for him. Tia kept coming closer to Yoongi, sticking her body to him, and it felt so foreign he had to take a step back, “let me get us a drink?”

“Yeah! I’ll come with you!” Tia nodded, and they made their way down to the bar.

“What would you like?” Yoongi asked Tia, trying to get the bartender’s attention.

“Vodka soda!” Tia waved her glass and looked around, “hey! That’s Jungkook!” Tia yelled, pointing at the dance floor for Yoongi to place him, “He is the coolest human in my design class! His work is insane!” Yoongi’s eyes followed Tia’s direction to the dance floor. There he was, dancing and making a girl swirl to the beat as she laughed. He stumbled, his back hitting the bar. “You okay?” Tia asked.

His eyes didn’t leave her. She looked gorgeous, somewhat thinner. Why was she thinner? But so sexy, dancing to the beat on the stage. Y/N did have a way of capturing the scene. She threw her head back as Jungkook whispered something in her ear and swirled her around with him.

“Yoongi?” Tia repeated.

“Yeah, yes, I am good, I’m good, here,” He handed her the glass. “When you go up, could you let Jae or Sara, even Maria know that I’ve left? I’m just gonna go home. Not feeling too well.” He left for the door before Tia could respond.

He felt weird. “I wanted this, I wanted this,” He repeated, waiting for the cab to arrive.

“Leaving already?” Tara came and stood next to him.

“Feeling weird, are you going back too?” He asked, and she nodded. “Join me,” He pointed to his booked cab ride.

“I met Y/N,” she said.

“Yeah?”

“She’ll be fine.”

Yoongi just nodded, “You really think I could also find out who I am with her?” Tara looked at him in question. “That’s what you were going to say, right? Before Jae came in?”

Tara nodded, “I’ve known Jae and Sara since school. And Sara likes you, that should’ve been the first sign to not listen to that shit.”

“I didn't… I’m not naive. I didn’t take their idea and follow through,” Yoongi explained. “My parents have been discussing marriage. They bought the ring too, can you believe it? That is my thing to do when we are ready!”

“I thought she was your best friend?” Tara questioned.

“She is my best friend. And I’m being selfish. I know. But I’m all she has ever known. Do you know what her mum said before we left for uni? She said, ‘wow, looks like Y/N is in my tracks of having one man for life.’ God, her parents are so toxic.”

“I don’t get your point?” Yoongi was more in his head than in his ongoing explanation to Tara.

“What if one-day Y/N realises that she doesn’t want to be like her mom? She hates her parent’s relationship, and they were together since school as well. What if she realises that what we have can translate into what her parents made of their marriage?”

“Wow, I thought you left her cause you wanted to figure out life for yourself.”

“I did. I do. I want us to have a chance to figure out what not being together feels like. So, that we are sure we want this. I want to explore being young and single for a bit. Just being with myself and not having my life dictated by my parents. And she will see this. She is smart. I just don’t want to have any expectations for once.”

“Okay, I’m no shrink. But you need help, Yoongi,” Tara cut him off. “And you clearly are very confused about her place in your life. If you don’t love her, end it! It will do you both good!”

“What the fuck? When did I even say that?” Yoongi yelled. “I do love her.” He wasn’t in doubt at all.

“Oh, did you tell her that you were feeling stuck? Scared? Claustrophobic?”

“I literally didn’t say any of those things,” Yoongi sighed. Clearly, Tara did not understand his situation.

“Yeah, you’re not naming it. But it is what it is. You just threw her out of your life cause Jae told you his story of toxic romances and girlfriends not having a life. And Sara, who is fucked up, by the way, made it like Y/N didn’t have a life without you. And you agreed to it the entire night, and the next we know is that you are not with her anymore,” Tara really did like Y/N more. “And what if she likes this break and finds someone new? What will you do?”

Yoongi didn’t respond. He hadn’t thought this through.

—

“So, you remember, Jungkook?” Zoya asked me as we climbed the mountain. No one could change Tae’s plan, and here we were, climbing this stupid mountain under the sun.

“Who?” I asked, trying to blink through the sweat.

“The hunk who you danced with all night, you lil minx!” Zoya tickled her.

“Yes, he texted me.” I laughed. “Wants to grab a coffee with me,” Zoya raised her eyebrow, “soon too!”

“And, what did you say,” she asked.

“I really don’t want to go on a date, so I asked him if we can meet as friends,” It was all that I could offer. “And we are going to meet next week.”

“Are you okay? Seeing Yoongi? With that chick?” She asked.

“I don’t know. I’m not thinking about it,” I told her honestly.

—

Classes had started again, and all my time not working was spent at the library. I had taken up a research project, and the readings were driving me crazy. It was 11 PM, and I was still here. Thankfully, my therapy was going great. We were reworking my narrative about belonging to someone. I should belong to myself first before giving a part of myself to someone else.

With Yoongi, I had made him my safe haven, which was not fair to either of us. She made me see how I was more dependent on him and how that had influenced so many of my life decisions. Like not going on the trip with all my girlfriends because Yoongi wasn’t interested or not taking classes or going to movies which I liked because Yoongi might not have enjoyed them. Instead of treating him as my friend and partner, I was wrapping my life around his choices which made me more like a crutch. Maybe that’s why he felt like he needed to move on.

It had been more than three months, though, and I was okay. I missed my friend more than I missed anything else. We could talk about anything. Talk about our future, our interests, and our problems. He just got it without me having to explain it to him. He was truly my best friend. But relationships evolve, and maybe that would be us.

If he was here right now, he would totally understand why I was getting competitive in my class and why I felt I needed to take on this stupid research project.

“This is an announcement for all students. We will close the front desk in 30 minutes. Please come to the front desk for any books intended to be taken out of the library.”

“Ugh!” I quickly picked up my books, which I wanted to issue under my name, and ran to the front desk. “Hey! I can still continue studying here, right?” I asked the librarian.

“Yes, we are just closing the counter.” He nodded.

“Great,” I really needed to finish these readings cause Tae had Nadia over, and they were unreasonably loud at night.

“Hey,” I felt a shiver down my spine.

I turned around, “Yoongi…uh…hi.”

“Need help carrying those?” He asked, looking at the mountain of books, the librarian was issuing for me.

“Ah no, I’m good. I carried them all here,” I smiled. I pulled the books towards me.

“Wait, let me help. Can I just have this book?” He asked the librarian, who quickly issued his book. “Here,” He took half my bunch, “where to?”

“Umm, I’m looking for a comfy place,” I looked around.

“I know the perfect spot! C'mon,” He walked off before I could respond.

We took the lift to the 5th floor, “We have a dedicated space for the architecture wing, and that place has this tiny room, with the comfiest floor sofa with a table and a coffee counter in the next room.” Yoongi explained, all excited.

“Oh, we don’t have to. I can find a place….”

“You’ll love it. C'mon,” He sped up again before I could argue.

To his word, the place was so comfy. It also had a wall of floor-length windows at the other side of the table with a beautiful view of the campus. We sat down next to each other, and I sorted my readings.

“Are you prepping for a paper?” He asked, pulling his notebook out as well.

“Research project,” I answered.

“Ah,” he nodded. “Read on,” He smiled, getting ready to read as well.

—

Yoongi couldn’t help staring at her in between reading his book. She kept biting her pencil trying to sort through her sticky notes because she always started with a colour coding system which fell apart within minutes. It was a while before she took a break and just looked out of the window.

“How are your classes going?” He asked. He had been dying to speak to her. For the first time ever, he didn’t know what was happening in her life, and he had so much to tell her too. He liked this, though, sitting next to her. It felt like home.

“Not bad. It’s tough, but I’m trying to do better,” She responded.

“What about yours?” She asked.

“Tough. It is very new. I had to make a model the other day, and all I wanted was that little sticky tape you had for your earrings. You know, the one you stick behind your-”

“Ear tape? It’s to help with the weight,” She laughed.

“Fuck yeah, it would have helped so much to hold the weight of this stupid model,” Yoongi took out his phone to show her pictures. The wallpaper was still her, which she didn’t comment on, “look at this. It took me more than 10 days to make this, and the professor threw it against the wall.”

“Wait, what the fuck?”

“Don’t worry! He ended it by saying that people who had their projects thrown against the wall should be proud, which was me and four more of us.”

“Proud?”

“Yeah, ours was worth him looking at and critiquing, and the other 20 kids had failed.” Yoongi continued, telling her stories of all she had missed, and she instinctively told him all of hers. It was so comfortable. It was like a habit. They went out to get coffee and kept talking about places they had eaten, new content they had seen, and people they had met. “Oh, I have a friend, Jungkook, who can really help you design this landscape. I can speak to him if you like. I think he uses that software. Atleast I think so. Yeah, you can’t let that bitch win? How dare she claim your idea as hers!”

“That’ll be nice,” Yoongi gulped, remembering him from the club, and it shook him from the trance he was in right now. “You’ll be surprised. I’ve met loads of people like her.” he didn’t want their conversation to end.

They keep talking as they leave the library to walk home. Their home, which was no longer theirs, but they don’t realise it as they open their takeaway order on the table and sit down to eat.

“Ugh, my back hurts so much these days. I feel like I’m sitting and reading all the time!” Y/N stretched on the sofa as she finished showing him her research proposal.

“Come here, let me massage it a bit,” Yoongi made her turn so her back for facing his front. “Relax your shoulders,” he massaged her neck, just like she liked it. She moaned as Yoongi hit her spots, and it went right down to his dick. It had been so long since they had been together, and the noises she was making had him a little dizzy at this time of the night. “Do you like it, baby?” He asked her.

She nodded, tipping her head back as his hands went down her back, kind of dizzy herself with this feeling. It was instinct. It had to me. You couldn’t tell who kissed first, but Yoongi’s lips were on her, warm, fervent against hers. His hands went around her neck, tipping her face down and kissing her deeply.

“Oh gosh, Yoongi,” She moaned, turning her body and climbing his lap. She could feel him hard, thick against her core, as she wrapped her body around his and pulled him in further. Yoongi couldn’t pull her close enough to him. He wanted to touch all of her, all at once, have her in his veins, for it had been too long that he had her so close. It was an injustice to not have her this close to him at all times, it was wrong, and he could not think of one reason why he had let this happen.

She raised her arms as he pulled her oversized hoody off. She looked like sin, in just her bra and underwear in her hoody she liked wearing as a dress. She wastes no time getting his clothes off while trying to get him closer to her. He is so hard against her, and when he plunges into her, it feels like time stops, and it is just them at this moment.

“You feel so good,” He moans, pulling her closer and kissing her all over her chest as she moves in his lap. “Please don’t stop.”

“I’m never going to stop,” she whispers, getting his lips on her again. He fucks into her until she is sobbing in his arms and then cumming around his cock. She bites his shoulder as he releases inside her, holding her close, with her head on his chest. “Stay,” he says, and Y/N can’t think of anything else as she falls asleep in his arms.

Y/N has placed this sofa in their house, in a way where the light hits it directly during the sunrise. That’s how he knew she was gone before the sun was up.

—

One more part and we wrap? I wanted to show more of a journey for them. 

What do you think? 

Give me your thoughts on what you want to happen next if you like?

©mymuseagustd@2023

Sweeter than Sugar | Kim Taehyung MB

Genre: Boyfriend! Taehyung

                                       “Hold me tight, hug me                            Can you trust me, can you trust me                                           can you trust me                                            Pull me in tight” 

                                                 -Kim Taehyung, Hold me Tight

MOODBOARDS

Please do not use these without consent.  

love you anymore ; kim taehyung

falling out of love is such a painful thing; telling him is even worse.

↬  pairing ┇ domestic!tae x gender neutral / gender non-specified reader

↬  rating + genre + warnings ┇ pg, total anGst, a break up, sad bbys ):

↬  word count ┇ drabble, just under 700 words

↬  avalyn’s notes ┇ u know what ,,,, i really thought id be awful at writing angst but im happier with this than my usual fluff

[  navigation  ︴ send me feedback / writing requests  ]

“Mm, Jagiya?” Taehyung’s deep voice calls out to you as the door to your shared apartment clicks open. Your heart throbs at the nickname, forcing you to squeeze your eyes shut in what you refuse to acknowledge as regret. In the hallway, you hear your boyfriend shuffle his shoes off and place his belongings down.

Sinking into the armchair of your living room, you hope it would swallow you whole. “Ah, Jagi, I’m so tired.” He notices you slumped into the cushion and joins you, laying his head in your lap and stretching out his limbs, letting out a quiet groan.

You sigh. You allow yourself this moment — one last moment, with him.

“Today I was thinking about how much I love you,” he looks up to you, flashing you a childish smile that spread over his cheeks, “I don’t think I could love you anymore if I tried.”

“Taehyung-ah,” you call him under your breath. Your voice was shaky; no doubt he noticed the wavering tone as you avoided his eyes. He sits up abruptly, using two fingers to lift your chin gently from the ground, but your eyes still don't meet his.

“Jagi?” He’s concerned, and the way he snakes his fingers tenderly around your forearms almost makes you change your mind.

Almost.

Making up your mind, you close your eyes. “I don’t want to see you anymore.” You meet his gaze in enough time to see the moment his heart break, his eyes losing that sparkling glint you once loved and his lips falling into a frown you no longer wanted to kiss.

“Wh-what?” You rise and step away from his hold, and he subconsciously follows, leaning forward towards you, so you back away further. Taehyung’s arm stretches out to you, “Why? Please just stay and talk to me.” His voice is strained, like his throat is void of anything but emotion.

Fiercely, you shake your head, fighting back tears you knew would never spill. “I’ve made my decision.”

His expression quickly contorts from pain to jealousy, “Are you leaving me for him?”

Your eyes widen as you cock your head. “Who?”

“Jin,” he says with newfound spite, as if he wills for that to be the answer. “You're breaking up with me to be with him.”

“No, Tae, why would I ev-”

“Makes sense,” he scoffs, and the tone of his voice stings. You know it’s his defence mechanism but you can’t deny the pain his words inflict.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You argue. “He’s my best friend!”

“I’m supposed to be your best friend!” He yells, though you’re unsure whether he meant to. An unknown fire fuels his eyes, and you’re surprised. You’re scared. This two-year long relationship didn’t have to end so sourly, but it wasn’t purely all your fault.

“I can’t be with someone that’s never here,” you mutter under your breath, but he catches it.

Taehyung massages his temples, screwing his eyes shut momentarily, deep in thought, “This is my job. This is my life.”

“Those are two different things, Taehyung.” You're trying. You're reaching; you told yourself you wouldn't. A helpless sigh leaves your lips, “There’s no him. There never was. It was always you. I fell in love with you.”

His eyes are low lidded, his expression weary, though you no longer feel the need to cup his face and console him, “Then what happened?” he whispers, as if he doesn’t even want the answer.

“I don’t love you anymore.” You don’t look up -- you can’t. You know what you’d do if you did, and you’d gone too far to go back. You didn't want to go back. There was no more regret: no more remorse for the man you no longer loved.

The pain in your chest is too much. You didn't know heartbreak was a physical pain, but you felt your heart sobbing more than you were in that moment.

You tune out his soft yet incoherent muttering, turning away from him for the very last time, swiftly grabbing the bag you pre-packed before heading for the door.

"Goodbye, Taehyung."

navigation ︴fic recs ︴ ask / send me feedback / writing && reading requests

↬  all works are member x gender non-specified reader && are drabbles under 1k words unless stated otherwise!

↬  please do not copy, repost, or claim my work as your own!

↬  bts are real people, i only own original storylines && dialogues.

insomnia  ┇  boyfriend!joon  〈  fluff, long-distance  〉

↬  it’s your first night away from him, && you just cannot fall asleep.

↬  tbc!

paint by number  ┇  husband!yoongi  〈  fluff, romantic  〉

↬  you have a free day without him, and this is what you do…

holly and ivy  ┇  neighbor!yoongi  〈  fluff, festive, >1k  〉

↬  since when was your definition of a perfect christmas a cosy night in with your cute neighbour and his dog?

for you  ┇  husband!hobi  〈  fluff, romantic  〉

↬  after all these years, you're surprised to find out the extent he'd go for you.

↬  tbc!

love you anymore  ┇  domestic!tae  〈  angst, breakup  〉

↬  falling out of love is such a painful thing; telling him is even worse.

milkshakes  ┇  bestfriend!kook  〈  platonic fluff  〉

↬ sometimes all you need is him, milkshakes, && a late night catch up.

you need to listen when the Devil's calling.

Black Wolf (kth)

Summary: The dossier on your target is dismally thin, a couple of pages mostly about The Black Room, a rumored facility located deep in the Vietnamese jungle that trains children to become deadly weapons. You're looking for a chameleon, a man known as Kim Taehyung along with a host of other aliases. You consider yourself good at your job, but in the end, you don't find him. He finds you.

This has been a long time coming so I hope you like this indulgent Black Widow Taehyung fic! Ft. Loki!Jimin and WinterSoldier!Yoongi because I think they're neat for plot points

Warnings: Violence, blood, knife fights, shooting, mentions of hospitals and death, childhood trauma (briefly mentioned), smut, some degradation, oral (both m and f receiving), cumplay, unprotected vaginal sex (wrap it up folks), lots of sexual tension

Word Count: 15995 (I used to be in the Marvel fandom I have a lot of feelings)

You blink once, twice, but it doesn't help the fogginess that's taken over your vision. You sigh and close your laptop.

The room is filled with pictures of the same man: a lean body and half hidden face, coming out of a convenience store, something like a smirk at the mouth as if he knows you can't get a clear shot from the CCTV footage if he keeps looking down. There's almost as many crime scene photos pinned up next to those pictures. Whenever he is sighted, death follows. Always someone high up in society, a political figure, sometimes an athlete, sometimes an organized crime boss. Men. Women. Never children.

You absently rub the inside of your wrist, over a raised scar he'd given you five years ago. You still don't know how you got the drop on him. You wonder if maybe it was the other way around and for some reason, he decided not to kill you.

It isn't like you'd heard him. No, he'd been utterly silent, like a shadow. You hadn't seen him, either, not that you would have had time to react if you had.

It was almost like you felt him, some change in the air around you.

No time to draw your gun, all you could do was reach inside your leather jacket and pull out your knife, slicing through the air before you could think, your heart pounding.

The knife bounced uselessly off an arm gauntlet, nothing like you've ever encountered, too lightweight to be Kevlar but maybe stronger.

That's when you'd seen him.

You'd been looking for the Wolf a year at that point, and in all your research you'd imagined what he would look like.

For one thing, you'd thought he'd be older.

He looked younger than you do, boyish smirk and all. The bright red hair that was slicked back from his forehead looked soft and clean.

You'd imagined he must be handsome, given that you'd referred to him as a honeypot assassin, often his victims are found in general states of undress. You couldn't have imagined how handsome, how sharp the line of his jaw, half smirk on his face. Everyone's type.

"Hello there, little bird."

When he spoke, the tip of his knife was so close to your throat that you'd swear you could feel the vibration of his baritone through it.

You were holding him back or at least you think you were, but from how relaxed his stance is, you think it's likely he's letting you hold him back.

Panicked, you tried to remember your training. Keep them talking.

"Bird?" You croaked out.

The Wolf gives you just the slightest tilt of his chin. "Flitting around, here and there, taking your pictures."

Fuck.

He knew you'd been tailing him. Probably knew your name, your age, your family's names. You'd built his profile, you know how he worked.

"I just wanted to talk to you," you started, and his eyes narrowed just a split second before you pushed him back as hard as you could and ducked, narrowly avoiding the slash of his knife.

You scrambled backwards and he kept coming, and you didn't even know he'd cut you until you felt the blood trailing down your arm.

“Shouldn’t lie, little bird,” he warned, and you knew he could move faster than this, knew he was holding back for some reason, but if you could just get to the street then your partner could see you and-

The Wolf’s knife was a silver flash in the dark and it was at your throat again, his other arm caging you against the alley wall.

“I know your name!” You blurted out, desperate, and his dark eyes widened in shock. He doesn’t move away but he doesn’t cut you either, so you keep talking.

“Kim Taehyung. Born in Daegu, given up by your mother hours after labor. Presumed dead at 10 hours old.”

“How do you know that?” He demanded, voice raspy, but then your partner shined a flashlight down the alley, called your name, and the Wolf dropped his knife, vaulted over your partner, and disappeared into the night.

You’d needed ten stitches to close the wound he’d given you, but you know it could have been much worse.

That had been years ago, and there’d only been these little glimpses of them. You’re the only agent that’s gotten that close, though, so you stay on the case. He gives you just enough to keep you chasing him through Korea, Japan, China. Right now, you’re at a motel in Los Angeles because he’d been spotted outside a club, or at least that one side of his face had been.

You’d been here three days with very little sleep and no other sightings. It’s time to hang it up and go to bed.

You flop down on the hard, motel bed and think that your agency could spring for a nicer hotel before sleep overtakes you.

It feels like thirty seconds before you wake up and you can’t breathe.

Kohl rimmed dark eyes look down at you, one large hand clamped over your mouth.

He half smirks at you. “Hello again, little bird.”

Taehyung’s first memory is of a 10x10 cell with a folded mattress in one corner and a thin blanket. He remembers being hungry and food being slid in through a tray, ramen and beef and he eats as if he’s never eaten before.

Maybe he hasn’t. He doesn’t remember.

He doesn’t know how long he was in his cell but all he can remember from that time is a low, gravelly voice through the chute.

“Eat up, kid.”

Sometimes the voice would tell him stories (mostly war stories that somehow had a happy ending), and sometimes the voice would just grunt, tell him to eat. Taehyung could always sense him outside the door, though, as if he were guarding him.

Eventually, he gets to meet the man with the voice, but for the longest time, he doesn’t know his name. They just call him The Soldier.

Taehyung doesn’t know how old he is but the Soldier always seems wise, so much older than him. As Taehyung grows, though, the Soldier doesn’t get any older. His face remains the same as does his gravelly voice and the mechanic whirring of his prosthetic arm.

Breakfast is first, then training. So much training. With knives. With guns. With sticks and bats and with just their fists. The Soldier oversees all of it and he’s sparing with praise but he always seems to have a bit for Taehyung, even if it’s just a nod or a slight smile on his full mouth.

When Taehyung’s cell seems to grow smaller because he’s grown taller, become a man, The Soldier attacks him the second he steps out of the cell, and Taehyung gasps, ducks and spins as he’s been taught to avoid attack. The Soldier doesn’t stop coming, doesn’t change his face, dead serious and silent, until finally Taehyung tackles him around the waist, takes him to the ground, with all the others watching in awe.

The Soldier doesn’t try to get up and Taehyung stays there, holding him down, for a long moment, panting. The Soldier leans up to whisper in Taehyung’s ear.

“You’ve earned my name, kid. I’m Min Yoongi.”

Taehyung doesn’t know what that means, doesn’t know the secret that really is, until years later.

He hasn’t seen Yoongi or the black room in three years now, working for whoever pays the most and avoiding contact with any other agencies, especially yours. It rankles him that you’d been able to find him, been able to find out his name of all things. Taehyung himself hadn’t known his name until he was out of the Black Room, after the rebellion. Someone had sent him his birth certificate and death certificate in an unmarked envelope.

Possibly the same someone who had outed his location to you. Possibly the same person who had sent a burn notice to his agency.

Taehyung had woken up when his hotel window had slid open. Whoever had done it must have thought they were being quiet but they were an amateur, the sound waking him immediately.

Taehyung slid off the bed as if he didn't have bones, and when the intruder had one foot on the floor, Taehyung stood up and took him by the knee, hanging him over the fire escape.

The intruder yells but the sound is lost among the sounds of the city and the wind.

"Who sent you?" Taehyung yells, over the wind, because now it doesn't matter that someone might hear him, the whole hotel is a wash, he'll have to bolt without scrubbing the place, they'll know where he was but not where he's going.

The intruder yells something and Taehyung can't make it out but then he sees the foam trailing in the air he scoffs and let's go of the intruder's foot.

He's dead before he hits the ground, has burst a cyanide capsule with a back tooth. Taehyung knows now (or thinks he knows, as he finds out later), who's after him.

Hydra.

"Please," you whimper, tears forming in your wide eyes, and Taehyung removes his hand only for you to draw in a deep breath and he clamps his hand over your mouth again.

"Ah, ah, little bird."

He's smiling, almost fondly, and your heart is battering your chest plate because that's almost more frightening than a hard stare.

If he wanted to kill you, you'd be dead already, your inner voice reminds you, and you start to breathe slowly through your nose, knowing this is true.

You try your best to keep calm and eventually he removes his hand. You don't scream, and when you try to sit up, he moves away from you, but only slightly. He looks calm and unbothered but he's stiff, tense, and you know that you don't have time to reach for your gun, which you keep just under your bed.

"Why are you here?" You ask, and it comes out like a croak.

He shrugs, and it does nothing to lessen how tense he looks. "Had some free time."

Your eyebrow quirks up. "Oh? Thought you'd spend it with an enemy?"

Taehyung pouts, and it's truly frightening how cute he looks, disarming and boyish, no more dangerous than the young men you'd fallen into bed with in college.

"We aren't exactly enemies, dove. I'd call us...colleagues."

"Hm," you respond, and look around the room. He's shuffled your papers around your desk and you wonder how long he'd been in your room without you waking, how that was even possible.

"What were you looking for?"

"Maybe I just wanted some company," he responds, shifting on your bed to lean toward you.

His face is inches from yours, as if he might brush his mouth against your lips, but you know he's more likely to draw his knife while you're busy staring at his pout.

Dangerous, how handsome he is, how charming. The very definition of a honeypot assassin, drawing the marks in like flies.

"Wouldn't think you'd have too much time for love," you say dryly, and he laughs, an open, happy sound that shocks you.

"Oh, little bird. That's what I'm hired for the most."

"Love?"

He nods. "Love or hate, it's all the same in the end. Can't have one without the other. Wives who want their husbands dead, husbands who can't stand seeing their wives with other men."

"Have you ever been in love?" You ask, shifting toward him this time, one of your feet dangling off the bed, hoping to distract him.

His mouth crooks in a half smile. "Oh, about a hundred times."

He's looking at your mouth and you lean in closer before darting your hand down to the floor.

He grabs your wrist before you get halfway there. He doesn't twist, his hand strong around your wrist but not hard enough to leave a bruise.

"Come now, little bird. I've used that trick a hundred times." He chides, smiling as if you're old friends and he hadn't tried to kill you previously.

"Why are you here?" You demand, your voice shaking in spite of yourself.

Taehyung sighs, as if inconvenienced by the question. "I need your help," he says finally, tone soft, and of all the things you'd thought he'd say, that wasn't in the realm of imagination.

"Why?"

You keep pushing him even though he's a killer, even though you know he could decide to end your life at any moment.

You think it might be because you feel as if you know him, after all these years researching him. The company that you work for wants to imprison him, use him for their own goals, but maybe deep down you want to help him.

"I've been burned," he says, flatly, and your eyes widen in shock.

It isn't exactly true, but so little of what Taehyung says is.

He doesn't need your help. The Black Room and to a better effect, Yoongi, had taught him above all else, self sufficiency. A burn notice means that instead of half the world trying to kill him, most of the world is, and while that makes things harder, it isn't impossible to do alone.

But you know things about him. Lots of things. Things he himself hadn't known until he was an adult, like his real name.

"How..what could I possibly-" You stammer out, and it's really quite endearing how your eyes keep widening.

"You know my name."

"Taehyung."

He points at you, as if you've just won a prize. "You know my history."

"Just bits and pieces, you're a spy, a lone-"

He rolls his eyes. "Wolf, yes, I know. I tired of the Black Wolf moniker very quickly. It's a bit dramatic, don't you think?"

"Yeah, you're not dramatic in the least," you drawl, and Taehyung's eyes snap to yours, a smile stretching the corner of his mouth.

It feels odd, this smile, one of the first genuine ones in years.

"Are you making fun of me, little bird?"

"I wouldn't dare." Your eyes don't match your words. You've even relaxed just a bit, no longer poised as if to go for your knife or strike him over the head with a lamp.

"You can help me."

"Help you...what? Hide out?"

Taehyung scoffs. "No. Help me find out who burned me."

He stands up and stretches and your eyes follow his every move.

"Why does it matter?"

"I have to kill them, of course." He smiles at you quizzically and you swallow hard.

Taehyung thinks that if fear had a smell it'd be pungent, like sweat. It doesn't though, at least not to human senses, and for all his training Taehyung is after all, human, not the fabled Black Wolf he's been called. Fear has a feeling, though, hanging in the air. Fear has a look, a slight widening of the eyes, wrinkle in the forehead, excessive swallowing.

Fight or flight response.

Which will you choose?

You stare at him for a moment longer.

"Do I have a choice?"

"You always have a choice, little bird." Taehyung draws his knife, now, and the air feels heavy with your fear. He flips it idly in one hand, catching it by the hilt once, twice, three times before you answer.

"What do you need me to do?"

You go into work later that day as if you hadn't spent the night with the Black Wolf, the very man you'd sworn to bring in.

You could talk to your superiors, tell them what happened, but something tells you that he'd find out, that maybe he'd be taken in but not before he'd slit your throat in your sleep, leaving you there for the hotel manager to find.

You take all your files on the Black Wolf and while you’re leaving the office your coworker puts his hand on your arm.

Well. Not coworker. Boss, you suppose, or what passes for it.

"Is everything all right, Agent?"

There's a rock in your throat, fear making your heart race.

You nod, hurry towards the elevator.

"We appreciate what you do for the organization." He says in response, and your heart lurches as the elevator moves.

You’ve always known that your job isn’t one that you walk away from. It seems more clear than ever that one wrong step could lead to your disappearance.

On your walk back to the apartment where the Black Wolf was waiting for you, you think about how there is no one to miss you. You're an orphan and you were never able to find your siblings, even though you tried when you came of age.

You wonder if everyone who works for the organization is replaceable.

Taehyung isn’t in your hotel room when you arrive and you’re not sure if you’re relieved or concerned.

As you walk toward the bed, he swoops in through the window and you stumble backward, a scream turning into a squeak in your throat.

He’s dressed in a white t-shirt and gray sweats now, barefoot so that he doesn’t make a sound when he jumps down onto the carpet. He’s barefaced, even a little bit of stubble on his chin and jaw but no less attractive. You have no idea where he’s gotten the clothes, and you’re still trying to catch your breath when he smiles at you, tilting his head in that way he has. It’s alarmingly disarming.

“You’re still here,” you gasp out, and his smile turns to a frown.

“Of course I am. You haven’t helped me yet.” He slips past you easily, his shoulder grazing against yours as he rifles through the minibar, pulling out a handful of the fun sized Snickers and tearing one open with his teeth.

You take in a deep breath, your heart rate finally changing from hummingbird to somewhat human.

“I still don’t know how you expect me to find--”

“You’re good at your job, little bird. You found me,” he says easily, giving you a big smile before opening another Snickers with his teeth.

That’s that, you’re off on a lead that you’ve had for months, a lead about who might have leaked the Black Wolf’s birth certificate.

You head there in the car that you’ve rented, leaving the world’s most notorious assassin sprawled in a robe on the hotel bed and you trying to avert your eyes.

“Don’t leave the room,” you warn.

Taehyung had scoffed at you. “Of course not.”

You have a gun taped to your lower back, the handle just slung into the back of your jeans, but you’re hoping you won’t have to pull it when you see the shadow of a man on the street. It’s nearing dusk and the streetlights have just come on. You pull up several feet behind the shadow and keep your hands free as you walk toward the building, just a small post office where the birth certificate had been postmarked.

You slow just a bit right before you reach the alley where the shadow is coming from, but it’s perceptible enough because you find your wrists pinned above your head in a flash, your back pressed against the brick. He’s so close, almost intimate, and when you look up you recognize the wide brown eyes.

He winks at you, wearing a black mask and a hoodie.

“You scared the hell out of me!” You hiss, and he chuckles but he’s still got you pinned with one hand, chest pressed against yours.

“You’re not very quiet,” he scolds, and then his head ticks just barely to the left, and he leans down closer to you. “Pull the mask down and kiss me,” he orders, voice barely above a whisper, releasing your wrists.

“What?”

Taehyung rolls his eyes and tugs his mask down, pressing his mouth to yours, just barely gliding his tongue over your bottom lip. You gasp, your body instinctively leaning toward him before you pull away and push at his chest.

“Don’t be so cold,” Taehyung complains, staggering backwards as if drunk. “I was only an hour late.”

You finally realize what’s going on when a group of men make a wide berth around the two of you, thinking that you’re a couple having an argument on the street.

When the coast is clear, you feel like you can finally breathe again.

You yank the post office door open a little harshly, unsure if you’re angry or just sexually frustrated. The man had tried to kill you five years ago, and here you are feeling flushed from a kiss.

“You taste good,” Taehyung murmurs in your ear as you approach the post office boxes lined up on the wall and you nearly stumble.

“I thought you were staying at the hotel,” you mutter, eyes scanning the wall. You find the post office box you’re looking for and do a quick dust with a portable fingerprinting kit. You’d tried to explain that you wouldn’t get much from this, that it might have a hundred fingerprints on it, but Taehyung had insisted.

You’re about to tell him this again but when you turn around after putting the kit away in your bag, he’s standing at the doorway, pretending to fill out a change of address form.

Your heart begins to hammer in your chest. You’re no world famous assassin but you are trained to know that something’s wrong, that someone is watching you, maybe both of you.

Your hand itches to reach for your gun but you wait.

Sure enough, about a minute later a man walks into the post office. He walks toward the back wall, where you’re standing, and you turn and try to brush past him.

“Excuse me,” he mumbles, and you think you’re in the clear until you hear the ding of the door as someone else comes in. A woman wearing a mask and sunglasses, at dusk. You pull your gun just as Taehyung tackles the man next to you, pressing him up against the wall and the woman reaches for something in her purse and you bark at her to keep her hands up.

You move toward her slowly, training your eye and gun on her so that she can’t move away.

She seems familiar to you but you can’t quite place where and you get closer she starts to back away to the door.

“Don’t let her get away, little bird,” Taehyung calls to you, his voice calm, almost lilting. “She’s our canary.”

Taehyung doesn’t care what kind of interpersonal politics are going on in the company you work for, but he knows you don’t seem much like a spy. You’re quiet, of course, stealthy, probably good with firearms instead of knives like he is, but it’s your attitude.

You’re upbeat, almost...trusting. You don't flinch when he comes toward you, don't jump when he calls your name, or more often, "little bird." If you're a bird, you're one of those unafraid pigeons in the common square, coming up to anyone who might offer a bite of bread.

You’re wary around him, but not afraid, and that concerns him. He’s not sure why, exactly. It isn’t as if he couldn’t slit your throat and leave you bleeding out in your hotel bed. That was, after all, his plan after he got the information he needed.

Somehow, though, your lack of fear is a bit...intoxicating. Even just moments ago, when he’d had you pressed against the wall and could so easily slide his knife into your side, right into your liver just above your ribs, you hadn’t flinched. You’d kept your eyes on his.

Maybe not a pigeon at all, more like a hawk with your sharp eyes. Maybe that’s how you’d gotten hired.

Sure enough, when he picks out the woman who looks like she knows things, you get her arms behind her back, shove her towards him and he holds her while you tug out a zip tie from your bag and tie her hands.

“Look in my back pocket,” the woman gasps. “I have an identification card. I work for-”

Before she can finish, you tug the ID out and your eyes widen.

“They told me to follow you,” she says.

“She’s lying,’ Taehyung says, like he’s bored, and draws the woman’s hands higher up her back, straining her muscles so that she cries out.

“I know,” you answer, and he’s surprised, although he doesn’t show it.

Not showing emotions unless you can use it for your own gain is rule number one of the Black Room, and he’s learned it earlier than most.

“Not about who she is,” you continue. “Or where she works.”

You pace around them, watching the woman intently, and Taehyung finds himself oddly attracted to you.

It isn’t as if he’s immune to such things, he’d had his fair share of dalliances that he enjoyed despite it being a means to an end, but he’d never found himself attracted to anyone in the midst of a mission that wasn’t solely a honeypot mission. You’re easy enough on the eyes, the curve of your body meant for a hand at your waist, your eyes fringed with black lashes that you look up at him under with those shrewd eyes of yours. Taehyung feels alarmed at being distracted by this feeling, this attraction, and he shakes his head a bit, realizing where he is, what he’s doing.

“We can’t do this here,” he rasps, nodding toward the dead man on the floor and you startle, as if you were also distracted, only by finding out the truth rather than attraction.

Taehyung leans down, whispers in the woman’s ear, presses a blade against the base of her spine. “If I cut you deep enough, you’ll never walk again. So don’t do anything stupid, yeah?”

To her credit, the woman he’s been thinking of as the canary doesn’t make a peep as he leads her to the car, but he doesn’t move the blade until he’s thrown her in the backseat.

“What are you going to do to me?” She asks, voice shaky, in the elevator, and she’s either really afraid or a good actress. Maybe both.

Taehyung shrugs, but you answer for him.

“Nothing. You just have to be honest with me.”

Taehyung doesn’t believe you’re lying, but, again, maybe you’re a better actress than he knows.

He tosses the woman on the bed and she wiggles to flip over onto her back, scrambling up against the headboard.

“Why were you at that post office?” You demand to know, taking a step toward the bed. You don’t have any weapons on you, but you seem a bit intimidating nonetheless.

“I told you, I was told to follow you-”

You strike her across the face and it makes his dick twitch in the hotel gift shop sweats he’s wearing. It’s a little distressing.

The canary cries out but softly, as if she knows better. “I...I was supposed to meet someone,” she admits, and a line of blood runs from her left nostril.

“Who?” You ask, and Taehyung sits down in the office chair, watching you with pointed interest, not that it would show on his face.

“I can’t-”

Another strike across the face and Taehyung wants to groan.

“Some canary,” he comments. “Not much of a singer.”

“Okay, okay, stop hitting me!” The canary yells, looking more angry than afraid now. “Someone paid me half a million dollars to deliver a package. All I had to do was drop it off at the door, but my partner wanted to go inside since you guys were in there, wanted to kill you so there weren’t witnesses.”

“What package?” Taehyung asks, sitting up now, no longer distracted.

“I don’t know. It was heavy, but I wasn’t supposed to look in it. I dropped it at the front door.”

Taehyung curses his own worry about being burned and you being distracting that he hadn’t noticed it. It will surely be gone now.

“He’ll come for me, you know.” The canary says, smiling now, and Taehyung realizes her fear and anger both were an act all along.

“Who?” He asks, standing up to look out the window. It’s closed and locked tight, ever since he’d slid his way inside.

The canary smiles wider. “You’ll see.”

As if she’d caused it to happen, the fire alarm starts to go off, ringing impossibly shrill in Taehyung’s ears and he curses.

“Leave her,” he tells you and you start to protest until he takes your upper arm and drags you toward the stairwell.

You open your mouth and he thinks briefly that he wishes there was time to kiss you again before he puts a finger to your lips to make you be quiet, opens the stairwell door and shoves you inside before closing it and putting his back against the door.

He can hear you banging on the door but he drowns it out, listens for the sound of footsteps that he knows are coming.

If he’s right (and the Black Wolf always prides himself on being right), the man he’s looking for and might be the cause of all of this, of why he’s hiding out in a two star hotel instead of at one of the apartments he has scattered across Seoul, will be heading straight for the hotel room. Straight for the canary.

Sure enough, thirty seconds later there’s still no smoke and he sees a man in a trenchcoat heading toward the door of the hotel room.

Taehyung springs out from the doorway of the stairwell and pushes the man against the wall, taking him by the collar. Taehyung is shocked when he sees the man’s face, having seen it all over the news just a few months before.

“Ooh,” the man says, laughing a little. “Like a bit of rough trade, do you?”

“Loki,” Taehyung accuses, shoving him up against the wall again although the man has made no move to slip away or fight back.

There’s just the hint of a flash of something like anger in Loki’s eyes, something anyone but Taehyung would have missed.

“I don’t go by that name anymore. Call me Jimin.” His eyebrow raises slightly, still making no move to escape. “You’re the Black Wolf, right? Surprised to see you here.”

“The hell you are,” Taehyung growls, and pulls him close only to shove him back against the wall harder.

Jimin groans and laughs. “Rough trade indeed. I only heard a friend of mine was in trouble.”

“Jimin?” There’s a call from the hotel room, the canary that you and Taehyung had left tied up on the bed.

There’s another flash, nearly imperceptible, across the god’s face, concern this time.

“Loki Odinsson cares for someone other than himself?” Taehyung taunts, and this time the god slips out from under Taehyung’s arm, shoves the taller man against the far wall.

“I told you. That’s not my name,” he hisses, and then he’s gone, a twist of black smoke in his place.

Taehyung curses and runs into the hotel room, and Jimin is there, releasing the woman on the bed. She puts her hands comfortably around her neck but Taehyung manages to grab the god around the waist, pulling him backward to offset his balance, and as soon as the two separate, Taehyung has the woman pulled up against his chest, a knife at her throat.

That’s when you make it into the room, your cheeks red and your hair flying out of your ponytail, looking angry and confused in equal measures. You take in the scene and freeze.

“Now now, wolfie,” Jimin says calmly, but there’s a tightness in his features, rage or fear or both. “What good is all this conflict? Just let go of the girl-”

“Give you what’s yours?” Taehyung retorts, pressing the tip of the blade into the woman’s throat. She makes a whimpering sound in the back of her throat, something Taehyung has to tune out in order to do what he needs to do. He’d never liked killing women, never liked killing at all, really, but it’s what he’s best at, what keeps him alive and keeps food in his mouth, a roof over his head.

Jimin shrugs. “She’s useful to me. If you kill her, it would greatly inconvenience me.”

“Is that so? Maybe I want to inconvenience you.” A small line of blood starts to trickle down the woman’s throat.

The god stands there for a moment, throat working. “What, then? What do you want from me?”

You have absolutely no idea how you got roped into a road trip with a rogue agent, the Black Wolf, and a fucking trickster god, but here you are, sitting in the backseat with your gun pressed into the agent’s back.

She goes by Star, apparently, although you’re sure that’s not her real name, and she’s been the bane of your existence this whole ride, constantly trying to get away, once even opening the car door and trying to roll out on the interstate.

She finally calms down when Loki (Jimin, you remind yourself, he gets awfully pissed off when you or Taehyung refer to him as his given name), turns his head to smile at her.

“I know it’s not the best situation, pet, but stay calm for me?”

It isn’t an order, more like a request, and Star relaxes, nodding a little.

Taehyung drives like an absolute maniac and you can’t imagine how this is good for any kind of stealth mission, but you make it to one of his so called safe houses in under two hours that way, him throwing a tarp over the car and parking it in the garage so that you all can get into the house.

He’s warned you to never take your eyes off Star, she had been after all, the canary, just like he said, so you take her into the bathroom and keep the gun on her while she glares at you.

“You even have to watch me pee?”

You shrug. “Since your boyfriend is literally a god, seems smart to keep an eye on you at all times

She washes her hands, averting her eyes. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

You don’t respond, it’s none of your business what weird shit they have going on, but you assume Taehyung must think that Jimin has something to do with why he was burned, given how insistent he is.

You take Star into one of the bedrooms in the large safehouse, keeping your gun on her at all times, and she just shrugs and starts to watch television.

You can’t help but wonder, despite knowing that it might not be pertinent to your current situation.

“How did you end up involved in all this?”

Star gives you a look. “It doesn’t matter. It has nothing to do with this.”

“You don’t know that.” You shoot back.

“You can put down the gun, you know. He’s not gonna come in here unless he thinks I’m in real danger.”

“Why does he protect you?” You ask, unable to stop being curious. You suppose it’s a lifetime of being in a job in which you have to find out information, ask a lot of questions. Or maybe just because you’re hoping you’ll find out how to help Taehyung and he’ll get out of your hair.

“Why does the Wolf protect you?” Star asks.

You scoff. “He doesn’t.”

“Could have fooled me. He slit that guy’s throat because he was trying to shoot you, earlier in the post office.”

“He didn’t…” You pause, flustered. “He didn’t do that for me.”

Star shrugs. “Suit yourself.”

The Black Wolf has only ever protected himself and his own interests. He hasn’t been protecting you, but using you to get information about what’s happened to him, why he’s been burned. Right?

You slowly lower your gun when it seems that she won’t be running out of the room any time soon, and your eyelids grow heavy.

Jimin is doing his level best to appear calm, but Taehyung has been trained in the slightest expressions and body language, and the god is tense all over, shoulders stiff.

“How do I know that the girl is safe?” He asks.

“She’s safe,” Taehyung assures him, sitting down across from him.

Jimin frowns. “And I’m supposed to just believe you?”

Taehyung shrugs. “If you want to keep her alive, you don’t have any other choice.”

“I don’t know what you want from me.”

“The truth. Tell me why your girl was at the post office. Tell me what she was looking for.”

“She was looking for me. I told her that I would meet her there.” Jimin says easily, and Taehyung watches his face but it could just be a half truth instead of a whole truth. Usually, if people are telling part of the truth, they don’t bely on their face that they’re holding back. At least, the good liars, and all the press would indicate that Jimin is possibly one of the best liars.

“Who burned me?” Taehyung asks, leaning forward in his seat.

Jimin blinks. “I have no idea. Didn’t even know it had happened until you threw me up against that wall.”

Taehyung glares at him, but it doesn’t appear as though he’s lying.

Jimin finally sits back in his seat, seeming more relaxed, and it makes Taehyung frown.

“That girl of yours, you care for her?”

Taehyung scoffs. “I barely know her.”

“But you love her?”

Taehyung makes eye contact with the god across from him, repeating the words his trainers had drilled into him most of his life.

“Love is weakness.”

“We all have weaknesses, wolfie. Man and god alike.”

Jimin stands, brushing off some invisible speck of dust from his black trenchcoat, and Taehyung doesn’t move to stop him.

“It’s been fun, really it has, but it’s time I be going.”

“I don’t think so,” Taehyung scowls, but before he can get to him, the god has disappeared, leaving behind only those tendrils of black smoke.

Taehyung curses and runs toward the other bedroom, but all he sees is that you’re asleep in the chair and Star and Jimin are gone.

He’s full of rage, suddenly, because he’s been displaced from the solitary life he’d known and because you look almost cute with your head thrown back on the chair, full mouth parted, and he kicks your chair hard enough to scoot it slightly across the hardwood floor.

You wake with a start, standing and automatically pull your gun and then it’s all reflex, he gets your hand behind your back to make you drop the gun and you let out a surprised cry even though he hasn’t hurt you.

“You couldn’t do one thing I ask of you,” he growls into your ear and you buck in his arms, propelling yourself forward so that you get out of his grasp and turn to face him.

Your face is puffy but your eyes are flashing.

“I have done everything you asked me to, and I don’t owe you a goddamn thing! You broke into my hotel room and-”

“Because you were stalking me!” He shoots back.

“I was doing my job!”

Your chest is heaving with anger, cheeks flushed, almost like you would look…

Taehyung takes a couple of steps toward you and you circle around him instead of backing up and he feels a rush of heat through his body as you stalk around him like a predator instead of being afraid.

“You don’t give a shit about anything but yourself, Kim Taehyung.”

His name on your lips makes him startle a little. It’s not one he’s heard very often, since he prefers to keep his true identity to himself, going by a big list of other aliases when he has to blend in.

“Of course I don’t,” he scoffs. “That’s how you survive.”

“I don’t want to just survive. I want to live my life,” you retort, and he laughs and it sounds bitter even to his own ears.

“You? Living? Holed up in shitty hotel rooms across the country looking for people who do your job better than you do?”

Your anger slips just for a moment, a microexpression, but Taehyung catches it. It’s something like hurt and he takes another two steps toward you.

“Admit it, chickadee. You’re no better than I am. We’re both alone.”

“You know, for all the time I spent ‘stalking’ you, I had no idea you’d be like this.”

“Like what?” He’s close enough to kiss you, now, to see the way your tongue wets your lips before you speak.

“I knew you were a killer. I knew you were ruthless, seductive...but I never knew you were such an asshole.”

Taehyung chuckles, takes the final step toward you so that your breasts are almost touching his chest.

“What’s wrong, little bird? You want me to seduce you?”

He half expects you to strike him across the face, to shove at his chest, but instead you lean up just slightly, just barely brush your lips against his and he draws in a breath through his nostrils, leaning down toward you instinctively.

“I think you want me to seduce you,” you murmur, dropping your head to press a soft, wet kiss against his collarbone and Taehyung lets out a moan, puts his arms around your waist.

That’s when you shove him hard, both palms on his chest and he stumbles backward, caught off guard for the first time in years.

“Too bad.”

You storm out and lock yourself in the other room while Taehyung stands there staring at the space that you occupied seconds ago.

It’s another few moments before he curses and sits down on the bed and that’s when he sees it: a piece of paper, folded intricately into a swan.

It says, simply: Daegu.

The next morning, you wake up to Taehyung humming softly, sitting on the chair next to your bed and you scramble upright, pulling the covers up over your body.

“Wouldn’t have pegged you as the type to sleep nude, chickadee,” He drawls, raising one thick eyebrow, and you groan.

“It isn’t even daylight.”

“I knocked first, but you must be a heavy sleeper. Had to pick the lock.” He holds up a bobby pin and then grins and sticks it into his back pocket.

“You’re a fucking maniac,” you mutter, and start to get out of bed.

He just keeps sitting there and you turn to look at him.

“Get out!” You yell, throwing a pillow in his direction and he ducks it, still grinning.

“You’re grumpy in the mornings,” he chuckles as he walks out, closing the door behind him.

You take your other pillow and put it to your face to scream into it.

The Black Wolf is the most infuriating, possibly insane, and most attractive person you’d ever met, and you’re sure that by the end of this, you’ll be just as crazy as he is. The night before, everything in you had wanted to melt into him when he’d put his arms around you, if only because the rage inside you would probably be helped by primal hate sex.

It isn’t as if you’re any kind of prude or virgin, far from it, but you don’t make a habit of sleeping with men who murder for hire. It’s been quite a while since you’d been able to sleep with anyone, given the nature of your job and what you’d been doing to find Taehyung in the first place.

Your eyes widen as your thoughts circle back to your job, and you pick up your phone and wince at the three voicemails and ten text messages.

Taehyung bangs on your door again and you cry out.

“Wheels up in ten!”

“Oh fuck off,” you mutter, and when he knocks again you yell it and you hear him laughing through the door.

You call your superior, a man you only know as Francis, and he picks up on the first ring.

“Where the fuck have you been, Y/n?”

You could tell him now. You could tell him that you’ve been taken by the Black Wolf, have Francis send in a team to extract him, but that also means that if Taehyung were listening by the door he’d probably kill you before he got the words out. There’s a code you could use, but you’d be surprised if there were any code that Taehyung didn’t know, given his background with the Black Room.

Instead, you make up a story about having to have your appendix out and needing some sick leave, and in the end, Francis buys it.

Maybe you’re a better liar than you’d thought, or maybe when you got back home Francis would…

You stop that train of thought in its tracks. You have to focus on the tasks at hand and that’s 1. Surviving this road trip with an international killer, and 2. Not making out with said international killer.

Which means you have to find who burned him, and fast, before you give in to your baser impulses or he decides he doesn’t need you anymore.

You get dressed in a simple patterned jumper and Taehyung smirks at you.

“Look at you, chickadee. You look good enough to eat.”

“Where are we going?” You demand, and he hands you the slip of paper.

It’s a three hour drive this time and you spend the first thirty minutes of it in silence while Taehyung drives.

“Jesus Christ don’t you ever listen to music?”

Taehyung frowns. “Sure I do. Sometimes.”

You flip on the radio and he hums along with one of the tunes in a surprisingly clear baritone.

“You seem almost human sometimes. It’s weird.” You comment.

Taehyung snorts. “Is that supposed to be a compliment?”

“Nope,” you respond.

He turns his head to stare at you for so long he slightly runs off the road slightly before righting the steering wheel.

“You may be the most infuriating person I’ve ever met,” he says. “And I’ve met a lot of infuriating people.”

“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” You parrot back at him, smiling, and he groans as if put out but his mouth turns up at one corner, as if he’s hiding a smile.

Since the god has given Taehyung no more information than the city itself, he picks the most expensive hotel in town, pays with cash and he only carries a small duffel bag that must be stuffed with money and weapons.

You have no idea where he’s getting clothes, and at this point you’re afraid to ask.

At least he gets a suite so that you have your own room. You’d have expected the romcom trope of the hotel only having single rooms available, but in this, at least, you’re lucky.

“I’m going out to run an errand,” Taehyung says as soon as you sit your bag on the bed to unpack.

“What? You can’t-” You turn around, and he’s already walking out the door, waving at you as he closes it behind him.

You let out a long groan and contemplate screaming into the pillow again but decide against it, opting to take a long shower instead.

You’ve just barely put on your robe when Taehyung bursts into your room.

“I found something,” he says, words quick and almost excited, an emotion you’re not familiar with when it comes to him.

You turn away quickly to cinch the robe sash around you but he’s barely paying attention, his energy oddly nervous.

“I was just walking around, surveying the area,” he says, as if this is something normal people do when they’re in a new city. “I came across these apartments - a shithole, really, but I slid in behind someone that got buzzed in to check the mailboxes.”

You pause and perch on the edge of the hotel bed, watching him pace around the room almost in awe.

“There was a name there, a name I knew.” He looks at you sideways, as if he can’t reveal the name. “Someone that I...that I worked with. I think he has something to do with this.”

“Then we need to find him?” You ask, slowly.

Taehyung shakes his head vehemently.

“No. No, we can’t ask him. He’s not…” He lets out a frustrated breath and sits down on the bed next to you, his thigh against yours and it makes your skin feel hot.

“So what do we do next?”

“We wait until nightfall, go back, see if we can find someone that wants to talk to me about it. It’s mostly a retirement area. Elderly people love me.”

You stare at him in disbelief.

“I’m very respectful,” he explains, and you burst out a laugh before covering your mouth.

You stand up and head to your closet but Taehyung keeps sitting on your bed.

You start packing your things back into your suitcase and Taehyung frowns at you, calling your name softly. It’s unusual, hearing it instead of “little bird” or “chickadee.”

You turn to look at him. “You won’t need me now, right? You’ve got your lead, you’re a lone wolf or whatever. I can go home.”

Taehyung keeps frowning and stands up, walks up behind you.

You freeze with your hand on the closet door.

“You think you’re in control here?” He murmurs against your ear and it makes you shiver but it also makes you angry.

“No, I’m well aware that I’ve been being held hostage for weeks.” You snap. “But I’m tired and I want to go home.”

You turn around to face him, looking up at him. There’s a moment where you’re struck by how beautiful his eyes are but you won’t be fooled by a pretty face.

“Kill me or let me go.” You demand.

“There’s no third option?” Taehyung asks voice softer than usual, and he doesn’t move, so close to you that if he did decide to kill you he’d have a knife in your ribs before you could take another breath.

“What third option?” You ask, and that’s when he slowly raises his hand, as if you’re some wounded animal that might bite him, and traces his index finger along your cheek.

“You could stay and help me.”

“Why would I do that?”

Taehyung swallows, his eyes searching your face.

“Because you were right.”

You don’t speak, waiting for him to continue but his hand is still on your face, his thumb brushing the underside of your jaw and it’s hard to think about your next move.

“I...I am human,” he admits, as if it physically pains him to say it. “I feel things, just like you do, and this is...this might be...my family. Where I come from.”

“And where do I fit in?”

Taehyung sighs, presses his forehead to yours and something in you swells as if you might burst.

“I don’t know yet. I just know that you do. Fit in, I mean.” He almost stammers the last part and you’ve never heard him be unsure of his words.

You open your mouth to say something, you’re not even sure what, and then he tilts your chin up, covers your mouth with his, slow and deep and you make a noise into his mouth, your hands going to the buttons on his shirt instinctively.

He moves his hands to your ass, lifting you up, and your legs, traitors that they are, go around his waist automatically.

There’s this alarm in your brain that keeps getting fainter and fainter as he kisses you, slow and deep and thorough, as if there’s all the time in the world.

He presses against you, moves his mouth down to your throat and leaves wet kisses down to the tops of your breasts, pausing only to shove aside your robe and run his thumbs across your nipples while he catches your mouth again.

Taehyung, quiet all this time, lets out a low groan against your ear that makes you gasp into his mouth and rock your hips against his, feeling him hard and thick against you.

It goes quicker after that, he picks you up and pivots you to the bed, covering your body with his and pushing your robe apart impatiently, leaving kisses down your body until you’re trembling.

Those alarm bells have silenced, now, replaced with need and a growing pressure in your stomach. You can’t help moaning when he parts your thighs and then spreads your lower lips, staring at your pussy as if it’s some delicious meal he’s about to devour.

He doesn’t just eat you out, he buries his face in you, inhales you before licking the flat of his tongue against your entrance and up to your clit, no teasing.

Your hips buck and your hands go into his hair and for all his control he moans against you when you tug on his hair, buries his face deeper, sticking his tongue just barely into your entrance before replacing it with a long finger.

He breathes in through his nose, stiffening his tongue to flick across your clit, looking up at you and you arch your back when he adds a second finger, crying out.

“Taehyung,” you gasp as you hurtle toward your orgasm, but he doesn’t answer, curling his fingers inside you to hit just the right spot and you cover your mouth when you cum, your moans muffled against your hand.

He lifts his head as you’re still clenching around his fingers but he doesn’t stop pumping them in and out of you, his chin covered in your slick.

He frowns, licking his lips, and leans forward, his fingers going deeper inside you and making you cry out again. He circles your wrist and tugs it away from your face.

“Don’t hide. Wanna hear you,” he rasps.

“Fuck me,” you plead, and you’ve never been one to beg but you’re so hot all over, you need more even though you’re bucking against his hand.

“Patience, chickadee.” He says, calm now, focused on your face.

You groan in frustration when his thumb just barely brushes your clit and lean up to kiss him, tasting yourself on his tongue and he makes a sound in the back of his throat like a growl when you shift to bite down on the base of his throat.

“Just gotta have it, do you?” He asks, flirty but he’s not smiling, eyes dark with lust and you bite back a sigh of relief when he moves his fingers from you to unbuckle his belt, shoving his pants down his ass to reveal his cock, standing curved against his tight stomach.

Thicker than you’d imagined (and you’ll admit that you had imagined), bigger than you’d imagined and you’ve never been a size queen but your mouth waters just a bit.

“Gonna keep being a tease or are you gonna put that thing to use?” You taunt, feeling empty now that his fingers are gone.

Taehyung smirks briefly and then goes serious again, his hands rough on your thighs as he yanks you to the end of the bed.

“If I had more time, I’d shove it down your throat,” he mumbles. “Make you choke on it.”

“Not a punishment,” you gasp as he teases your entrance with the head of his cock.

Taehyung chuckles. “I guess it wouldn’t be, not for you, little bird. You’re an eager thing, aren’t you? Cock hungry.”

“Yes, fuck, hurry up!” You moan, rolling your hips up so that just the tip of him slides inside you.

Taehyung hisses and his grip on your thighs tightens as he rocks inside you, slow at first but only for a moment before he’s fucking you hard and rough and dirty, just how you’ve always liked it.

“You hate me but you wanted this, didn’t you?” He asks, his gaze flickering from where he’s fucking you to your breasts to your face. “Wanted me to fuck you so hard you’d forget your own name.”

“You wanted to fuck me,” you shoot back, but it’s in a strangled gasp as he fucks you harder, rocking you forward on the bed only to yank you back by your thighs or hips, whichever is easier.

Taehyung grunts. “I did,” he admits. “Wanted to know how your cunt tasted the first night we met.”

You’re so close to your orgasm you’ve lost the ability to speak, your eyes rolling back in your head as you arch up beneath him.

When you come down, he’s slowed inside you, rolling his hips now instead of the jerky rhythm he’d had before.

You focus on his face, aftershocks of your orgasm making you shudder.

Taehyung crawls onto the bed, managing to mostly stay inside you as he leans down to kiss you, slow and thorough like before and this time it’s a different kind of pressure, building slow from your throat down to your cunt.

“Jesus fuck you’re tight,” Taehyung growls against your mouth. “I’m close.”

You open your mouth to speak but he kisses you harder, his teeth nipping at your bottom lip, starts to fuck you hard again and you’re cumming and then he’s pulling out, grunting as he paints your belly and breasts with cum.

You look down at yourself, shocked at what has just happened, at how you’ve just been fucked (very well) by an international assassin.

You expect Taehyung to disappear into his room but he doesn’t, leaves only to go to the bathroom, bringing back a warm, wet towel that he cleans you off with, surprisingly gentle.

He sits on the edge of the bed for a long moment before you touch him on the shoulder.

“Stay?” You ask, and you can see by his side profile that he’s smiling a little.

“Aw, chickadee, you want to cuddle?”

You scoff and fall flat on your back on the bed.

“It’s aftercare. Don’t get it twisted.”

Taehyung shrugs and removes his shirt and you can’t help staring at the expanse of his back, seeing the white scars across his lower back and when he lies down, a circle of scarred flesh on his lower abdomen, a bullet hole, it seems.

Taehyung catches you staring.

“Not as pretty as my face, huh?”

You shake your head, shifting on the bed to put your head on his chest. “Just wondering who did that to you.”

He shrugs. “Don’t remember most of them.” He runs his finger across the bullet scar. “Just this one.”

You stare at his face but he doesn’t turn to look at you and so you focus on the clench of his jaw.

“How’d you get that one?” You ask when he doesn’t explain.

“A friend,” he says simply, like it doesn’t matter, and you don’t ask again, resting your head on his chest again and his heart is beating too hard.

It’s alarmingly easy to fall asleep like that, listening to his heartbeat slow and his breathing, and you think you must be dreaming when his hand drops into your hair, smoothing down the strands.

“Little bird,” he murmurs, in what must be your dream. “I’m not sure I was human until I met you.”

Taehyung wakes up just before dawn, like clockwork, like always. They’d unlocked the doors of the cells in the Black Room at 5:30AM, and he’s conditioned.

He’d always wanted to be the first out of his cell, the best student, especially when The Soldier was training them.

Taehyung had been 16 when the Soldier stopped showing up for training, and 20 the last time he’d seen him, in a black mask, hair hanging loose, and absolutely nothing in his eyes.

A sniper rifle bullet makes no sound, and Taehyung was off his game when he’d recognized The Soldier, and spent three weeks in the hospital with his liver bleeding.

Since then, he has tried not to think about it. Not thinking about things has always been how he’d gotten through his life, pushing everything dark and useless to some hidden locked corner of his mind.

Last night, he’d seen the soldier’s name. His real one. Min Yoongi. On a mailbox in Daegu, of all places. This of course, means that Jimin knew a lot more about Taehyung’s burn notice than he let on, but Taehyung had never been one to hold a grudge.

He hadn’t expected for this to become a journey about finding out his past. He didn’t even know he was interested in finding out about his past.

He’d been happy. Hadn’t he?

He sits up on the edge of the bed and you whine before rolling over, tugging the blanket around you in a burrito, only tufts of hair poking out the top, and it makes him smile.

Taehyung wasn’t lying when he told you that you made him feel human. Of course he’d always felt things. Anger, betrayal….fear.

Fear, most of all. The first memory he has is being so afraid he can’t breathe, sobbing so hard doubled over in a cell.

The Black Room had not turned him into a perfect assassin. He isn’t sure such a thing exists. Except for The Soldier with his dead brown eyes, stalking toward him as he’d scrambled backward, bleeding into his stomach, part of his liver severed by the bullet.

Taehyung shakes his head to rid himself of the memory, locking it away again. He’d felt anger at first, with you, because you’d gotten into his life in a way that no one else had. You’d known his true name, after all, something that he hadn’t even known most of his life. He’d felt interest, that’s for sure, because you’re beautiful and smart and wily, things that he values in himself. He hadn’t felt fear until you’d been attacked at the post office, and even then, he wasn’t sure why.

It isn’t as if he’d never felt desire for a mark, but that’s all they were. Marks.

You’re something else, and he has to admit to himself that it’s not just about your skills anymore. It isn’t that he needs you anymore, he’s gotten the information he needs. He wants you around, likes having someone to bounce ideas off of, go on road trips, hide out in hotels with room service.

Taehyung realizes, slowly, that the thing he’s felt most of his life isn’t fear after all, but loneliness.

He stands at the doorway to the bathroom, watching the tufts of hair he can see of you, hearing the way you snore lightly, for longer than he should.

Taehyung is gone when you wake up, the spot where he’d been still warm from his body.

You order breakfast, two plates just in case, having flashbacks from the night before that leave a blush on your cheeks.

You’ve really gotten yourself into a mess.

Something inside your chest aches when you think about his hand in your hair, the way he’d said “little bird” softly, instead of mocking.

You groan and plop down on the bed.

You wonder if he’ll find what he’s looking for and then you’ll never see him again.

You wonder if he’s gone already, after all there’s nothing he’s left behind that he couldn’t replace. That’s what he does, after all, gets the job done and disappears like smoke.

You don’t even have a way to contact him. There’s a burner phone that the two of you have been using but it’s at the hotel, sitting on the desk.

You’ve been sitting there trying to figure out how to feel about everything for a couple of hours when there’s a knock on the door.

When you look out the peephole there’s a bellboy standing there and you frown, wary.

“Sorry to bother you,” he calls. “Just bringing fresh towels.”

He is holding towels, after all, so you open the door, and when he looks up his face changes, smile turning wicked.

The towel is pressed up against your face before you can scream and everything goes black.

You come to inside a pitch black room. You’re tied to a chair and your mouth feels like cotton.

“Fuck,” you try to say, but it comes out slow and slurred.

“There you are,” the voice comes floating through the darkness and you recognize it, although you’re not sure from where. There’s footsteps and you’re not sure you’ve ever been more afraid in your life.

Instead of a punch to the face though there’s just a light touch on your tied hands.

“What do you want with me?” You ask, willing your voice not to crack.

There’s a lilting laugh and that you recognize.

“I don’t want anything to do with you, darling. I want your wolf.”

You hold back a laugh that’s more of a sob but it’s a near thing.

“You think he’s going to come for me?”

The lights come on, so bright that you shut your eyes before opening them again, looking into Jimin’s handsome face, with a familiar wicked smile.

“I know he will.”

Taehyung spends the early morning scouting the apartment complex, and he finds information even easier than he’d thought he would. Old men like to talk, and their wives like to feed him and talk even more, going on and on about how handsome he is and asking why he isn’t married himself.

Turns out that The Soldier had been some kind of war hero half a century ago, and Taehyung assumes it must be a grandfather or great-grandfather until one of the old women shows him a picture.

“He took up with that girl after she….” the old woman pauses and lowers her voice, as if telling him something scandalous. “After she was in the family way.” She must see the look on Taehyung’s face so she shakes her head and explains. “Couldn’t have been his, she was six months gone before she ever moved here. He was real sweet with her, though, never let anyone say an unkind word about her. Him and his buddy, they kept her fed and sheltered up until she had to go away.”

“Away?” Taehyung asks, fascinated, and the woman’s husband grunts at him when he misses his turn at dominoes.

“To have the little one, of course,” she says, as if Taehyung might be some kind of idiot.

Taehyung just nods, dumbly, finally playing his hand.

“What happened to her?”

The old woman sighs. “Poor thing died in childbirth, I believe. I was young at the time, and if you want to know the truth….” She leans down to whisper in Taehyung’s ear. “I had my eye on the Min boy myself, so I asked around about it. Never heard what happened to the baby, but there’s a place nearby that takes in young ones that need homes. You could try there.”

Taehyung stands up abruptly.

“Thank you, ahjumma,” he says gratefully, and bows, apologizing to the older man for ending the game prematurely as well.

It isn’t as if Taehyung is surprised, exactly. After all, he’d come face to face with a god recently, so the fact that his old friend might be some kind of immortal doesn’t shock him. What does shock him is that he might have known Taehyung’s mother, might have something to do with why he’d been burned.

In fact, there are a lot of strange things afoot. He hasn’t been attacked by anyone from The Black Room despite a burn notice, and of course he’s careful but he hadn’t expected them to give up so easily just because he left down or wasn’t staying in one of his normal areas.

It’s only a couple of blocks to the church, a sign that reads: Safe Haven above the double doors.

He finds out without much difficulty that there are records of the babies brought in, and gets a copy with a sob story about being orphaned.

It might, after all, be true.

His name is on the tenth page from 1996,and he finds it while riding in the cab on the way back to the hotel.

Kim Taehyung, male, arrived December 30, 1995. The young man who brought him says he was born a few hours before and his mother has passed on.

There’s no more information than that, and Taehyung huffs out a frustrated breath as he keeps searching through the document on the way up the elevator.

He knows something is wrong before he ever reaches the door.

There isn’t much amiss, but he doesn’t miss any small detail, and there’a a plant turned over by the window in the hallway of the hotel and it’s cracked enough that he can feel a breeze come through.

Taehyung doesn’t pause, heads to the door as if everything is normal but when he opens it, he draws his knife before stepping inside.

There’s clear evidence of a struggle and he isn’t sure why his heart is in his throat until he gets to the bed where a single sheet of paper has been weighed down with a stone.

In the same handwriting that had brought him here, there’s simply an address.

Taehyung spends an inordinately long amount of time stalking around the hotel room. This is clearly a trap, clearly set by the god who obviously knows all about Taehyung’s burn notice. Taehyung had already been fooled once, something that hadn’t happened to him since he was a boy. Not only is it obviously a trap, but it’s a trap that’s been deliberately set because Jimin believes that Taehyung will come for you, believes that Taehyung has some kind of feelings for you.

Taehyung had already been through this with himself more than once, about how he does feel something, about how he’d always felt things, maybe even more deeply than most people. However, his training had taught him that making decisions based on feelings doesn’t result in survival, and Taehyung had always survived. No matter what.

Even when the only friend he’d ever had shot him in cold blood, even when he was bleeding out on the pavement he managed to break The Soldier’s left tibia with a side kick and scramble beneath a car, hiding until he felt strong enough to get away. He hadn’t even hesitated.

Now, his feet want to carry him to an address where a god with unimaginable powers is waiting for him, all because of a person he barely knows.

Taehyung keeps remembering you this morning with your hair poking out of the blanket, the way you grunted as you rolled over in it. He keeps thinking of how you looked right into his eyes, arching up beneath him, how you were never afraid.

Taehyung doesn’t dare walk the ten blocks to the address but calls a cab after suiting up, all black leather which has the benefit of looking good as well as serving as a kind of armor.

The cab driver raises an eyebrow at him and Taehyung gives the older man a dazzling smile that seems to disarm him.

Taehyung is uncharacteristically antsy, and that’s nothing new given he’s felt that way since the burn notice, but he feels as if he might explode if he doesn’t get to you soon. He’s not even sure that he’ll survive this, given he has no idea what the god wants from him, but he’s determined to take someone down with him.

You can’t seem to stop crying and finally Jimin rolls his eyes.

“Please stop your blubbering, it’s giving me a migraine.” He pinches the bridge of his nose with his fingertips.

“You should just kill me,” you say, your voice strong instead of breaking despite your tears. “He won’t come. It’s been hours.”

Jimin tilts his head, smiling slightly at you. “You think I don’t have someone at the hotel room to make sure he does come, in the event that I’m wrong?” He pauses, picking some invisible lint off his shirt. “But he’ll come.”

He looks different like this, no trenchcoat, just a white button up shirt and black slacks, hair freshly washed instead of slicked back with product. He looks...almost handsome. Almost human.

“I keep telling you, he won’t!” You cry out. “He doesn’t need me anymore, you gave him what he needed.”

“I did. But yet he’ll still come.” Jimin says, determinedly. He ticks his head toward the metal door of the cell and you hear a man’s cry of pain and a woman’s scream. “Ah, here he comes now.”

Jimin opens the doors wide and Taehyung strikes at him and manages to land a slice across Jimin’s forearm before he pivots, shaking his finger as if to admonish the taller man.

“Ah ah, wolfie. You know how I feel about violence, but I’ll slit her throat before you can even start to untie her.”

Taehyung flips his knife over and Jimin laughs.

“You might be good with that, wolf pup, but I’ve been practicing knife play since before your grandmother was at her mother’s teat.”

Jimin brings out a knife of his own, longer than Taehyung’s with an intricate handle.

“Should I show you how good I am at throwing it?”

“Taehyung,” you gasp but he doesn’t even look at you, likely gauging the distance between the knife and your throat a few feet away.

“You think I came for her?” Taehyung laughs and you hang your head, not wanting to look at him.

Jimin smiles and it’s less mirthful than patronizing. “Of course you did.”

“I told you. I’m not weak.”

“And I told you, everyone has weaknesses.” Jimin tilts the knife toward you as if to point at you. “And she is yours.”

“You’re wrong,” Taehyung insists, and all you can do is sniffle.

You were stupid to ever let your guard down, to ever let him inside you, inside your heart like some kind of easily entranced mark of his. You’d read all about him, about how he works, how he plays sweet and seductive in equal measures, gets people to trust him before he strikes. One case you’d studied, he’d courted a woman for nearly six months before killing her, draining her of all the information he needed before simply slitting her throat in an alleyway. How could you have thought you were different? He’d used you to get to Jimin, to find out what he’d needed to know, and he’s only here to hear the rest.

Jimin turns to aim the knife at you and you gasp out Taehyung’s name, pleading, as if that will save you.

“What do you want?” Taehyung barks, and Jimin slides his knife into the back of his slacks and comes to stand behind you, his hands lighting on your shoulders while you cringe.

“Did you find out where you come from?” Jimin asks, looking at Taehyung almost shrewdly.

“Wh-what?” It’s only the second time you’ve ever heard Taehyung stutter.

“It’s important,” Jimin drawls, “to find out where you come from. Who you are.”

“I...I found out where I was born, yes.”

Jimin nods. “It took me a very long time to find out where I came from, you see, so I wanted to give you that courtesy before I took your life.”

You feel lightheaded from everything that’s happened but you scream when you hear Jimin’s words and his hands tighten painfully on your shoulders.

“Hush now. I might let you live if you keep quiet.”

“I thought you didn’t like violence,” Taehyung says, almost desperately, and Jimin sighs.

“I don’t. But it is sometimes necessary. For example, it’s necessary when someone is trying to imprison you, or kill you.”

“I’m not going to kill you. I don’t even know how to kill you.” Taehyung pleads.

You don’t know why Taehyung seems to be going to bat for you, what possible good it could do him, but you’re grateful, looking up at him with wide eyes.

“Oh, not you, wolfie. Well, not just you. You couldn’t do it on your own, you see. Barely anyone could. But my brother is part of some team building exercise....” Jimin rolls his eyes. “And he can really hold a grudge.”

“A team?”

“A team of elites, I’ve heard. Soldiers. Mutants.” He smiles. “Assassins.”

“I’m not part of any team. I work alone.”

“For now you do. But they’ll come to you. I have someone to take care of, now. Someone to protect. So I can’t let that happen. Congratulations! You’re the first on my list.”

Jiimin spreads his hands as if offering Taehyung some kind of prize.

You’re trying to figure out if you can kick over the chair, give Taehyung some kind of distraction, when Taehyung says something you would have never believed he’d say.

“I won’t put up a fight if you let her go.”

Jimin laughs as if absolutely delighted.

“Wonderful! We can avoid violence altogether.”

“No!” You yell. “Don’t you fucking dare, Kim Taehyung!”

“Before you kill me,” Taehyung says calmly, not even looking at you, “I have a request.”

Jimin tilts his head. “Fair enough. What is it?”

“Untie the girl and indulge me in a bit of knifeplay.”

Jimin looks at you and then back at Taehyung for a moment, and then shrugs, moving to untie your hands and feet.

“As you wish.”

As soon as you’re able to stand you rush to Taehyung but he grabs you by the wrists, avoiding your eyes as he shoves you out the open door.

“No--no, Taehyung, you can’t, he’ll kill you--” You babble, sobs tearing from your throat and you’re not even sure he can understand you.

“Go,” Taehyung says and his face is serious but his voice is strangled. “Run, as far as you can. As fast as you can.”

“No!” You struggle in his grasp but his grip on your wrists is like a vice. “No, you don’t understand what he can do, I spent years studying him-”

You can see Jimin juggling his knives behind Taehyung, calmly, as if he’s barely having to think about it and you try to rush Taehyung again.

Taehyung shoves you again, harder, and you stumble backwards, almost falling.

“Survive,” he orders, and starts to shut the door as you stand there, trembling all over. He pauses, looks at you and his eyes are wide and dark and unbelievably, a little wet. “But stay human,” he finishes, softly, and slams the door.

You try to open it again but it’s been locked from the inside and you pound on the doors, screaming his name, shoving your shoulder against it, but it won’t budge.

Just as your voice is starting to give out, someone bursts through the front door of the abandoned building and a large man stalks toward you, wearing some kind of...cape?

You wonder if you’re going delirious from being dehydrated and held hostage all day until he gets closer and he speaks to you.

“Excuse me, maiden,” he says, smiling politely, before he rips the steel door off its hinges.

When you scream in surprise, he turns to you.

You are frozen in place in shock for a few moments and all you hear is a brief struggle and Jimin cursing in a foreign language before the bigger man comes out with Jimin gagged, carrying him by his collar.

“Don’t worry,” the big man tells you as he comes out. “I’m just here to retrieve my brother, and it looks as if your man will live.”

Just like that, he’s stalking out the door with Jimin barely even struggling, seemingly defeated, and you finally snap out of it and rush into the cell.

Taehyung is slumped against the wall with a hand to his stomach, and his outfit is black but you can still see the blood streaking down the leather.

You rush to him and he gasps out your name, moving a blood streaked hand to your hip as if to check you for injuries.

“You’re all right?” He gasps, and you’re grateful that his voice or breathing don’t sound liquid.

“Taehyung, please tell me you brought the burner phone, we have to get you to a hospital--”

“No hospitals,” he says vehemently. “Shallow cut across the abdomen and a couple of broken ribs. Are you all right?”

You stare at him, crying, for a second before you lean down and kiss him, hard and sloppy because you’re so upset and everything has been so crazy, but the taste of his mouth is something you were sure you’d never taste again.

You look around the building, it’s obvious that Jimin had been using it as some kind of safe house, what with the custom steel cell, but there’s no clothing or bandages, it seems to have been cleared out.

With your help, Taehyung walks with you to a drugstore a couple of blocks away. He waits outside while you bring him bandages and buy him a sweatshirt so that it covers the blood enough that you can use the burner to call a cab.

“We can’t go back to the hotel,” Taehyung says, voice strained with pain.

“Obviously,” you groan, worried and upset, but you keep a tight hold on his hand in the cab.

“Sorry, chickadee,” Taehyung gives you a half smile. “Guess you’re good at your job, after all.” He gives another address to the cab driver, another nice hotel in the area. He must have scoped a few out before deciding on one.

Taehyung shoots back a few mini bottles of vodka and asks you to retrieve a bottle from his duffle bag, taking a pill that you’re positive isn’t aspirin before you start to stitch him up.

It’s certainly not the first time you’d done it, having been trained for this when you first started the job, but it’s the most shaky your hands have been. He ends up finishing the rest himself and you sit back in the chair, emotionally and physically exhausted.

“So what now?” You ask tiredly. “You take off again?”

Taehyung looks at you and it’s almost a glare. “I didn’t take off in the first place.”

“You always take off,” you shoot back.

“I just nearly got my guts spilled on a dirty floor to save your life, and you think I’m just going to fucking take off?” His voice is eerily quiet.

“Isn’t that what you did?” Your voice seems small, now, uncertain, and there’s this boil of emotions in your stomach that are almost making you nauseous.

“No! I went to scope out the apartments, I-” He pauses, sees you staring at him incredulously and points at the bed where he’d thrown down the folder. Suddenly, your work brain switches on, that part of you that’s inquisitive, that loves to solve a mystery and you pick up the book, flipping through it until you find his name and then flipping through the rest. When you reach the end of the book, there’s a note there, newer than the rest of the pages in the folder.

It has his name on it in block letters.

You hand it to him wordlessly and he looks down at it as if it’s a snake that might bite him.

“Go on. Open it,” you urge, and he crumbles it, tosses it on the floor.

You scramble to pick it up and give it back to him but he just sits there, shirtless and bandaged, eyes rimmed with kohl liner, and won’t take it from you.

When you finally drop it onto the floor again, he takes your wrists and pulls you toward him.

You squeal but you don’t struggle, letting him pull you into his lap.

He sighs out a breath against your throat when you’re seated, facing him, and it makes gooseflesh break out along your skin.

“Taehyung,” you say, softly, although you are trying to scold him. “You’re hurt, we need to-”

He cuts you off by planting a kiss at the base of your throat, soft, barely brushing his lips along your skin.

“You’re one of the only people alive that knows my true name,” he comments, words soft and slow, from the alcohol and painkiller or just from exhaustion. “I like hearing you say it.”

“Taehyung,” you repeat, and he makes a pleased sound in the back of his throat. “That letter might tell you what you’ve wanted to know, who put out the burn notice, so that-”

Taehyung cuts you off, again, by pressing his mouth against yours and it’s almost hesitant, this time, not like he’d kissed you before, slow and deep. It feels like your first kiss, not just with him but ever, how he breathes out softly against your mouth, how his arms tighten around you, fingers interlocking behind your back as if he wants to keep you here.

You pull away and press your forehead to his so that you can look at him and for the first time it isn’t just that blank face of his, that mask, and he looks open and soft and vulnerable, eyes big and dark and somehow...earnest.

You’re crazy for thinking that Kim Taehyung, The Black Wolf, could ever be earnest, but here you are.

“I don’t care who burned me,” he reveals. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

You open your mouth to speak but he shakes his head and you close it, waiting for him.

“You told me that I wasn’t human,” he starts, and then pauses. “I guess I wasn’t sure I was either, until recently.” He looks away from you, down to the side. “Until I met you.”

“I didn’t-”

“No, you were right. It’s always been about surviving, for me. The first memories I have are being taught how to survive, how to kill, how to give myself over to every base instinct that I have.” He looks back up at you now and his eyes are wet but clear, he is’t as drunk as you would have assumed. “But I feel things, Y/n.”

Your eyes widen in surprise, you think that’s the first time he’s said your name.

“Of course you do.”

He continues as if you hadn’t spoken and his gaze is so intense you almost want to look away.

“I feel everything, fear and loneliness and pain and…” He pauses again, as if the words are difficult to say. “Love.”

You can’t help the tears that well up in your eyes. “Don’t say that. Don’t say that if you’re just going to take off and-”

“Just let me say this,” he pleads and his arms tighten around you again as if he’s afraid you might move away.

You go silent but your chest hurts, something like fear rising in your throat because you’ve never thought about what it might be like to fall in love, certainly never allowed yourself to think of how you might be falling for him.

“I’m not sure what love means, really. I’ve been trained to cover up those kinds of feelings, and God knows I’ve never felt what it’s like to be loved. I’ve been living my whole life just trying to get to the next day, the next job, and I didn’t realize until meeting you how fucking lonely it is.”

“What are you saying?” It comes out in a hoarse whisper.

Taehyung laughs and it seems genuine instead of mocking like the other times you’d heard it.

“I don’t know. I’ve never...done this before. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. When I found out that you’d been taken, every part of me said to run, to get away from here so that they couldn’t come after me instead, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t wait to get to you. I was so afraid that something had happened, that he’d hurt you…”

You put your hand on his face and he turns into it like a cat looking for affection and it makes your heart skip.

“I’m okay,” you promise. “You saved me and you didn’t have to, and I’m grateful, but you don’t have to say all this, you don’t have to pretend-”

Taehyung shoots his gaze to yours. “I’m not pretending. I’m not pretending for the first time in my life. I have feelings for you. I want you with me. I don’t know what that means because I’ve been spending my whole life hiding every emotion I have.”

He shifts back in his seat suddenly, wincing only slightly in pain.

“But I’m a fugitive. I don’t even exist according to the government, so I can’t ask you to-”

“Neither do I,” you say quickly. “I’ve been working for my company for most of my adult life and been scrubbed from any archive. I’m pretty sure they’ll figure out that I’ve defected any day and come after me. I’m dangerous.”

Taehyung has the ghost of a smirk on his lips. “Dangerous, huh?” He leans forward to kiss along your throat. “Maybe I like a little danger.”

You moan softly before pulling back, wiggling to get out of his grasp.

He lets you go with a pout and you brush your hair back from your face, sitting on the edge of the bed instead across from him and taking a deep breath.

“I won’t deny that I feel something for you,” you say, and he breaks into a smile, a real one and it’s something to behold, big and open. It nearly takes your breath but you manage to continue.

“But I don’t really know what love is either,” you admit. “I’ve never been with anyone more than a few weeks and it was usually just for sex.”

“So you’re saying we’re both fucked up and we’re both in constant danger?” Taehyung asks pointedly.

You laugh a little and nod.

Taehyung smiles again. “Guess that means we’re made for each other.”

“Does it?” You ask, your smile faltering.

Taehyung moves as if to get on the bed and then grimaces, holding his ribs and you bite your lip.

“Wait, don’t...I’ll help you.”

“Chickadee. Y/n,” he whines, his arms out to you and you’d never expected to be in this position, with one of the world’s most notorious assassins asking you to cuddle.

You dodge his arms and move your hands to unbutton his pants, yanking the leather down until kneeling to remove them.

“What are you doing?” Taehyung asks, curiosity peaking in his tone and you laugh.

“Stop asking so many questions and let me take care of you,” you demand, putting your hands on his thighs to spread them, moving a hand to kiss at his hip bone.

“Ah,” he breathes out and strokes your hair for a moment before you move his hand, putting it back on the arm of the chair.

“Think of this as a trust building exercise,” you tease.

Taehyung chuckles low in his throat but keeps his hands on the arms of the chair, watching you as you dip your head to run your tongue along his balls.

His dick is thick, even half hard, and when you wrap your fingers around it, he moans softly to encourage you. When you take the head into your mouth he hisses and braces his hands on the arms of the chair.

You only tease for a moment because he’s cursing and whispering your name and because you’ve wanted him in your mouth for longer than you’d like to admit.

By the end there’s saliva on your chin, you’re taking him so deep, and he shouts when he cums down your throat, his thighs trembling under your hands.

“Little bird,” he gasps, after, breathing in shallow breaths to not hurt his ribs. “I knew you had a mouth on you, but-”

You burst out laughing and he grabs at you to pull you into his lap again but you shake your head.

“You should lie down. When the booze wears off you’ll be sore all over.”

You help him onto the bed but he pulls you down with him despite your protests.

Taehyung palms across your ass but you slap at him gently.

“You need to rest,” you insist, and eventually, he does, watching your face as his eyelids start to droop.

You fall asleep more quickly than you would have imagined given the night’s events.

Taehyung doesn’t pick up the letter from the floor when the two of you start to pack your things up, but you do, smoothing it out and sticking it in the side of his duffle bag where you know he’ll find it.

It’s in another hotel room in another country when he finds it while you’re sleeping, and sits in the bathroom on the edge of the tub while he reads.

Hey, kid.

I know it’s been a while since we spoke, and first of all, I want to apologize for shooting you. As I’m sure you’re aware, I wasn’t quite...myself.

I came looking for you when I was myself again, but you were in the wind. Not that I was surprised. I taught you that, after all.

Nevertheless, I got more years on you than you can imagine, so I tracked you down. Saw you living in hotels and studio apartments, saw you working marks and staying hidden, just like I taught you.

I’m sorry that’s all I taught you. There’s so much more to this world than killing and fucking and being alone, Taehyung.

I didn’t mean to sic that god on you. That was just a side effect of me leaving clues. He picked them up and went after you. I knew you could take care of yourself, but I sent that big brother of his to be sure.

I sent your birth certificate out so that you’d know your real name. Names are important, you know. More important than survival, really. Names stay even when we’re gone.

I guess by now you’ve found out that I knew your mother. I’m not your father, it wasn’t like that with her. She was whip smart, just like you, but too sweet for the world she was living in. I thought at first that you were too sweet, too, that the world would just eat you up, first time I saw you. I was wrong.

You have her eyes.

As for the burn notice, you’re smart enough to know that was me, too. I

didn’t do it to harm you. I did it so you could be free, Taehyung. When you grow up in a place like The Black Room, when you’ve never known anything else, been trained by liars and killers (myself among them), you don’t get to experience life, not how it really is.

What you get to experience is loneliness and emptiness, and that’s not enough.

Freedom means feeling things like heartbreak and longing, but it also means feeling things like happiness and love. It’s taken me a long time to realize I might deserve that, despite all the wrong I’ve done.

I think you deserve it, too.

Your friend,

Yoongi

Taehyung doesn’t read you the letter, still wiping tears from his eyes when he brushes his teeth, but you hug him tightly enough to make him groan from the pain in his ribs, anyway, reading his face.

Turns out, you’re good at that, too.

You’re standing in the lobby of the hotel waiting for a cab to the nearest port when you bite your lip and look at him.

“What do we do now? What comes next?”

Taehyung looks at you, and grins.

“For the first time in my life, I have no idea.”

Turns out, not knowing what comes next is the fun part of living, and Yoongi turns out to be right. Freedom is worth any price.

The Seal of the Dragon

Chapter one - Trials and tribulations

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, message me if you feel I need more warnings

Y/N trusted her father. At least that’s what she tells herself. And it’s what she keeps telling herself day after day when each day her father disappoints her more and more. 

“I’m using this money for your future” he would say, whilst reeking of beer and stumbling through the door to their house. On particularly bad days, he would barely make eye contact with her as he tells her that his drinking was ‘all her fault’. Her father spent his days, after his fall from grace, drinking away the money that the rest of her family was trying so hard to cling onto, to hold them afloat in the noble status that they were barely a part of. 

There were few things that made her life feel just that little bit better, and that was her best friend, Hwang Yeji. Yeji had been her friend since she could remember, her own mother telling her stories of how you were practically raised by both sets of parents. There hadn't been a day that had gone by that Y/N felt loved and appreciated by her best friend.

Hwang Yeji, from the Hwang clan, was a beautiful woman, who was adored by everyone in the town. She had the warmest brown eyes that sparkled in the sun, and her hair was a similar colour to her eyes, only being lightened by the long summer days. Yeji was both taller, and skinnier than you, but she never let you feel like you were any less stunning than she was. Besides your mother, she was your biggest supporter. Pushing you to do bigger and better things with your life.

As much as she was your biggest supporter, she was also the person who worried about you the most. She despised your father, for what he was putting you and your family through, but she knew that there was nothing she could do, other than being there for you, to have a shoulder to cry on when your father spat his harsh words at her.

It was a lovely summer morning, at the beginning of June when the weather was warm, but there was still a calming breeze that swept through the streets, cooling you off as it passed. Today, Yeji had decided she wanted to drag you into the centre of town, where the hustle and bustle were found. You were donning a dark pink Chima with a cream Jeogri, your hair pinned back with a hair stick you had received for your 18th birthday, it was made of silver with a simple pink crystal, the metal details of flowers making the pin even more beautiful in your eyes.

Your white shoes made small sounds against the sandy ground, as you moved towards Yeji's house. It took a few moments for you to reach her house, and just as you were going through the gate, to enter into their garden, you walked straight into a chest. Looking up in anxiety, you see her older brother smirking down at you. a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Hyunjin! Omo! I am so sorry, I was in my head again, did I hurt you?" you quickly blurted out, as a soft pink colour swept across your face, your heart racing, worrying that you had in fact hurt the man that was stood in front of you, smiling down at your flustered state.

"Y/N! It's okay, I know what you're like, you've been bumping into me since you were 4, you never could keep your head out of the clouds could you?" he teased "Yeji will be out in a second, mother is finishing braiding her hair, as for some reason, the pabo can't do it herself" he adds. Before you could respond, he cut you off saying "Anyways, duty calls. Stay safe both of you" he finishes, but not before looking behind you. Hyunjin smiles behind you, and then at you before moving around you and out of the gate and down the street. You giggle slightly at the man's antics, he also has been a ball of energy. When you were younger, you had a crush on your best friend's big brother, I mean who wouldn't, he looked like he should be on a poster for everyone to admire. But you soon got over that crush, quickly realising that although you saw the man as attractive, the bond you had was definitely one of a sibling rather than a lover.

You heard quick yet light footsteps behind you before you felt two small and delicate hands rest on your shoulders. "Was he winding you up again?" she asked, a slight smirk on her small mouth, remembering when you told her that you had previously fancied her bother. Your face flushed again before responding "he was telling me that mother was braiding your hair, and calling you... what was it?" a smirk gracing your own lips, before carrying on "oh yeah... a pabo" you ended, looking up at your friend as a look of annoyance came onto her face. You knew she wasn't annoyed at you, rather she was annoyed at her elder sibling. The look that fell over her face next, brought memories back of when the two had been fighting and pulling pranks on each other that you soon got involved in, for both sides. You saw the same mischievous glint in her eye that you had seen in her brother's eyes just minutes before.

"I want nothing to do with whatever scheme it is you are building up in your head" you laughed, linking arms with your friend as you pulled her into the street so you could begin your mission of heading into the town centre. "spoilsport" she retorts, before beginning to pull the two of you into a skip. Smiles filled both of your faces, even as the townspeople gave the two of you quizzical looks.

"what's the plan t-" Yeji began before being cut off by shouts in the streets, as people ran through handing small pieces of hanji to passersby

"THE KING IS LOOKING FOR A QUEEN! THE SELECTION PROCESS BEGINS IN 7 DAYS" was the main sentence that was being yelled out from within the crowds "MORE INFORMATION IS AT THE TOWN HALL" others carried on

Yeji turned to you, a smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. And without. a word, she grabs your wrist, pulling you full-speed to the town hall.

The Seal of the Dragon

Chapter Two- Taking the plunge

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, message me if you feel I need more warnings

Before Y/N could take another breath, her feet were being pulled from underneath her as Yeji dragged her to the town hall. Laughs fall from both of their lips. Finally, Y/N falls into step with Yeji's feet, allowing her to be able to run better without twisting an ankle. It wouldn't be the first time that Y/N and Yeji had injured themselves whilst running in the town.

"Y/N hurry up!" Yeji yelled, followed by a laugh. Yeji's hand gripped Y/n's, her strength and speed overpowering Y/n's. laughter filled the air as they ran through the streets. that was until an unnoticed rock decided to make an appearance. Y/n fell first, the sound of a scuffle being heard within the walls of the shop-filled street. A yelp soon follows, and then the sound of something dragging against the sand-covered road follows. Another yelp is soon heard, but softer. Y/N had fallen and as she was holding onto Yeji's hand, she had been dragged along accidentally. As the weight of Y/n's hand fell from Yeji's, she fell forward, her body falling to the ground. Yeji fell onto the floor, saving her head from hitting the floor by placing her hands on the ground first. People around them began rushing towards them, well towards Yeji, making sure that the beauty of the town wasn't harmed. A whimper leaves Yeji's lips as she holds onto her wrist. A young man whose name neither could remember, helped the young woman to stand up, before her in the direction of the medical room, hidden just inside the town hall at the end of the street. As people began to leave, they noticed Y/n's body laying quietly on the floor. Sand and dust still fall in the air around them. People stood there, staring at the recently turned adult, laying on the floor in a heap. It took for some muttering and parting of the crowd for someone to finally go up to her.

it was Hyunjin, Yeji's older brother. His hands gently shook Y/n's shoulder, trying to shake the woman out of the shocked state she was laying in. "Y/n, can you hear me? Can you get up?" He asks, worry filling his voice. A small mumble is heard before any movement is seen. Y/n tries to push herself up off of the ground, before whimpering and falling back onto the floor. Hyunjin sighs lightly, before turning, glaring at the staring bystanders, before calling out to his friends "Chan, Changbin, Felix" he begins "Grab the rest of the boys, my little sister needs help" he finishes. A blush blankets y/n's face remembering her crush on the elder boy, and the fact that he just called her his little sister. Y/n knew that those words should hurt her, but instead, it's what shook her out of her feelings of love for the elder boy. it hit her all at once, that the only feelings she had for the helpful man before her, were the love of a little sibling to an older sibling.

"Hyun-" Y/n managed to mutter out before Hyunjin stopped her, reminding her once again to call him Oppa. "Oppa" y/n restarted "everyone's looking" she carried on "I'm so embarrassed" she finally finished. "Don't worry, the boys are coming right now, we're going to help you. Do you think that you can stand?" he asks. Y/n shakes her head, pointing to her already red ankle that was beginning to swell underneath her chima. Hyunjin winces looking at the injury. A gentle hand is placed on her head, patting her head gently, making her feel calm. she looks up, into the eyes of the person affectionately patting her head and looked into the eyes of Hyunjin's best friend Minho, and if y/n were to look just behind the man, she would see the rest of their friendship group looking onto the scene with worry in their eyes.

"Chan and Changbin... you remember them right?" the brown-haired man asked, y/n nodded in response. a small smile gripping the older man's lips as he carries on his sentence "They're going to help you up, and then, you see that cart just over there?" a small hum of a response from the woman lets the man carry on "were going to gently place you into that, and then take you to the medical room. normally we would help you walk, but judging by that ankle, it doesn't look like a good idea for you to walk on it before the physician sees you"

They were right, it definitely wasn't a good idea for you to walk on that ankle. The physician diagnosed her with a sprained ankle, wrapping it tightly in bandages and sternly telling her to try not to walk on it for a while. Of course, all of the boys that were waiting outside the room, made sure you stayed true to your word, helping you heal. You met again with Yeji later, laughing when you saw her wrist wrapped the same way as your ankle.

A sigh of a laugh, left y/n's lips as she remembers the memory. The wind blew in her face, making her feel as if she was on top of the world. Within a few minutes, they both arrived in front of the town hall. Many people having had the same idea as them, standing in front of a board, holding many different flyers, all holding the word 'King' on them. Y/n's eyes glitter across the words trying to work out what this all meant.

A feeling of anxiety and a slight bit of fear filled her body as she read what the hanji said. The King was looking for a wife, this she already knew. But every woman from a noble family and upwards had to apply for it, failure to do so would mean that the Kingdom's officers would bring the family out and strip them of their pride in front of their town. Your heart sank, as you realised that you would have to partake in this.

A man dressed in a blue and white hanbok, with dark brown hair, warm brown eyes and plump pink lips, walked into the square where the hall sat.

"Annyeong haseyo. Kim Seokjin imnida" the handsome man began, his eyes falling onto the crowd. Your eyes briefly connected before he looked away. "I am the Supreme Commissioner. Under normal circumstances, it wouldn't be my face you see, although I'm sure that the majority of you have seen enough announcements in the town square to know who the usual person is" he carries on, his laughter filling the air, making you laugh under your breath at the noise.

"However, due to the circumstances, the responsibility has fallen onto my shoulders. And it is my job to announce to this town and a few of the surrounding villages and towns, to announce that the King has begun his search for his Queen. Any woman between the ages of 18 and 24 from a noble of higher status is required to begin the process of application to become the royal bride." he tells the crowd, his eyes scanning them all again. "Failure to do so will result in the family that refused the process of application, to be publicly humiliated and lose all titles they may hold, in front of everyone" he stops for a breath "and the King". The rumbles of chatter that had filled the square fell silent at the mention of the King.

The King wasn't a bad man, far from it. Although he was feared throughout the country, for his war tactics and victories, he was also known for being kind to his loyal court officers. The man was also known to have a close-knit group of advisors. However, there were rumours about the advisors, and the relationship they had with the great King. You never took the rumours seriously. The relationship that they had, it had nothing to do with you, so you never spent too much thought or energy on the rumours. "Applications must have been started within 6 days, and the process begins on the 7th day".

The noise within the crowd began again, mumbles from men, giggles from women, questions beginning to fall from children's lips. The voices of the crowd are silenced again when Seokjin continues his speech, "I wish you all good luck, and hope to see many of you at the procession", his speech finished with a wink to the crowd before turning and leaving the podium from which he stood on.

Yeji turns to you with a bright smile gracing her glowing skin. Excitement is clear on all of her features. She quickly takes your hands in her own soft ones. She looks into your eyes, her excitement dulling slightly when she sees the anxiety that is filling up your eyes. "This could be a good thing, it could solve some of your family money problems," she said, squeezing your hands in comfort. "or it could make it worse" you retorted, a frown pulling at the corners of your mouth.

Yeji could understand where you were coming from, growing up with you, she had seen your family go from strength to strength and then fall, nearly falling to a lower class, meaning she would lose her best friend, due to the distaste of classes mixing together. A small feeling of joy filled her when she was told that your family was still within the band of a noble. Deep inside she knew that even if your family fell even further from grace, she would never let you go, you were her best friend, practically a sister to her.

"It's not like either of us has a choice," she says a frown gracing her once happy features "but, this is something we need to do. For our families, for our country, for our King. We need to take the plunge" she says before taking your hand and pulling you towards the men holding the application papers.

The Seal of the Dragon

Chapter three: The application

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, arguing, harsh words, swearing, mentions of alcohol

message me if you feel I need more warnings

Anxiety filled your entire body as you stepped closer to the men holding the applications. You knew that when you took this application back to your father, and before you would even have a chance to tell him about the repercussions if you didn't apply, he would be on his way out of the door, on his way to the local tavern to waste away more money that was nearly all gone.

Your slightly shaking hand reaches out and takes the papers from the formally dressed man in front of you. You can't even bring yourself to make eye contact with the man, just putting all of your focus into holding yourself up and not dropping the paper that you had clenched in your fist. A shakey breath leaves your mouth, as you turn back around to your best friend. A gentle reminder from the woman to breathe has you letting out a deep breath, looking around. You begin to notice the other women in the square. Women who were nearly as beautiful as the stunning woman beside you.

A little voice in your head tells you that there's no point in being worried about the selection process. It was expected of a royal family member to be thin, yet with childbearing hips, and an auspicious face. You weren't skinny, you had never been. Never being able to lose the weight to look like the people that surrounded you. You had begun to learn to love your body, but there were days when this would become hard. Especially days like today, when you were surrounded by gorgeously elegant women, all looking to become the royal bride.

But, you knew that this was something that you had to do, for the sake of your family. For the sake of the pride of your mother, for the sake of your siblings. You couldn't let them down, that wasn't an option. And it would never be an option.

You turn back to Yeji, smiling slightly at her. "I think it's time I took my leave and returned home" you began "heaven knows that my father will have heard whispers about this and will be expecting me home"

Yeji nods, linking her arms with your own again, turning you back towards the road to your homes. No words were muttered between either of you, thoughts in both of your heads filling your focus. The silence between the two of you was comfortable, neither of you needing to speak, knowing that if you needed to talk, the other would be there for the other. "It'll be okay," she says as you arrive in front of the gate to your home.

Taking another deep breath, you turn to her, smiling warmly, before turning back to the gate, pushing it open, and putting a fake smile onto your face. One that your father either couldn't see through or didn't care to know whether it was fake or not.

As you reached the doors, you slip your shoes off, placing them safely next to the door, where no one can trip over them, unless someone was blindly drunk. Sliding the door open softly, you step inside, looking around the room, quickly making eye contact with both of your parents. You send a genuine smile to your mother, and restore your fake smile when sending a fake smile to your father.

"Eomma, Appa" you began "has the news reached you both?" you asked, waiting for their response. Your father squirmed slightly in his seat, whilst your mother smiled gently at you. They made eye contact with each other before nodding slightly. Sighing, you carried on "The Supreme Commissioner himself visited the town square with the news" you added to the conversation before moving on to the details "it requires any daughter between the age of 18 and 24 from a noble status or higher to apply for the procession which then goes onto the selection process"

"you won't be proceeding with this" your father almost laughs, as he looks you up and down. If the looks you got on the street standing next to your friend didn't make you feel small, the look your father was currently giving you certainly would. Deep breaths seem to be the only thing getting you through today, as the next thing you did, was take a deep breath, before continuing the conversation with your father

"Appa, you have no authority in this decision. The law declares that if you don't begin the process when the royal officers make their rounds and find a daughter of age, they will bring the family to the town square and humiliate them... not just in front of the town" you paused before finishing "but also in front of the King"

Y/n suddenly jumped remembering the rest of the details that you knew your father would hate "failure to give your daughter to the King will result in the family losing all title, money and pride"

Your father's face paled instantly, knowing he now had to decide between drinking and using the money to put his only daughter forward for the King. "Maybe I could do both," the man thought to himself. Your mother sighed, before speaking "Cheonsa, it would be an honour to present you to our gracious King. We must begin preparations now" The woman who always makes you think of elegance, stands from her seat. Beginning to busy herself with preparations, not even sparing her husband a look, knowing that if he had his way, then the family would be stripped of everything and publically humiliated. She would not let that happen to her family, she would die before that happened.

"The palanquin needs to be restored and decorated" she began, pacing the length of the room "then we must begin the process of application. There is much to do". The mother begins to walk toward her daughter, the sight making her nervous. Once her mother reaches her, she takes the piece of paper out of her hands, briefly glancing over it, seeing what she would need.

"Go prepare yourself for dinner, we are dining with the Hwang's" your mother says, smiling at you, before turning around and leaving the room. You nod, even though she would not see it, before bowing and leaving the room quietly. Once out of the room, you waited to hear any noises coming from the room your father was still sitting in. Hearing nothing after a moment or two, you move your body to head toward your room. You debate changing into a cleaner hanbok, but you decide against it.

Looking in the mirror, you notice that your hair looked rather dishevelled. This makes you decide that the best decision is to sit in front of the mirror and attempt to tidy it.

After a few minutes of trying to sort it out, you have only made it worse. Seeing your reflection in the mirror made you frown. You looked tired and stressed, the stress evident in the way your eyebrows knotted together. You rest your arms on your dresser, letting your head rest on your forearms. Your hair that had already fallen out of the hairstyle from you trying to fix it, falls around your head, surrounding you in a shadow.

A knock on your door alerts you that someone wanted to come in. Another sigh leaves your lips, as you lift your head up, letting whoever was at the door enter.

Your heart drops into your stomach when you see who was behind your door. It was your father and he was angry.

"How dare you tell me that I have no choice in this matter. I am the parent, not you, DO NOT treat me as a child" he begins yelling. He begins moving towards you, his anger seeping out of his every pore. You quickly stand up from your position, thinking it would be safer. Your father disagreed, this made him angrier. He lunges forward grabbing what was left of the braids in your hair and yanking his hand towards the floor, making you fall head first onto the floor with a thump.

"I AM THE MAN OF THIS HOUSE" he continues "I MAKE THE RULES, NOT A FAT LITTLE GIRL WHO WON'T EVEN MAKE IT PAST THE FIRST STAGE" he yells, crouching down to get in your face. his voice returns to normal as he grabs your hair again, pulling it towards his face "I wish you were never born. You should have died, not your sister. You're a disgrace" he finishes. throwing your head to the ground again. You try to keep the whimper inside, but it comes out making your father even angrier. But before he can continue on his rampage against your emotions and your head, your mother storms in, fire raging in her eyes. She grips the angry man by the ear, pulling harshly. She uses the grip she has on his ear to pull him out of the room and eventually out of the house.

Moments later she returns to your room, scooping you up in her arms. "Know you are none of the things that he said you are, nae salang/sarang" she whispers into your hair. Your head pounds as you lay curled up in your mother's arms. Shock still absorbing you, you stay deadly still in her arms, worrying that the man that you once adored would come back in. Somehow knowing that you wouldn't respond to anything for a few minutes, she begins stroking your hair, gently singing a lulaby from when you were little [AUTHORS NOTE: this is what i found from searching into a Korean lullaby, as i don't quite know how to type Korean, ill be writing it in how its spoken]

" mong mong geya jitjimara, uri agi jaldo janda, ggoggo dakah ulgimara, uri agi danjam ggenda, jajang jajang uri aga, jaldo janda uri aga" she softly signs. Slowly you can feel yourself calming down as the gentle strokes on your scalp continue along with the gentleness that your mother's voice holds.

"jaldo janda uri aga, byul bodado bitnan aga, jajang jajang uri aga, jaldo janda uri aga" Your mother finishes the first chorus, ready to carry on to the chorus once again when you decide to turn around and hug her tightly around the neck. Once you are ready to let you, you push yourself away from your mother looking at her face, worry clearly etched into her skin. "Now look at this hair," she says, "I thought I told you to get ready, not get worse" she smiles jokingly at you. Pushing a piece of hair behind your ears, she smiles lovingly at you "now let's get this hair sorted"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Considering how the early part of your evening went, the rest of the evening went well. Your father even going as far as to barely drink. You think it had something to do with the constant glares he received from your mother, along with the bruise blooming on the skin of his ear. The sight of your mother scolding your father with just her eyes made you smile a bit. It made you feel safe, knowing that as you went away, even if it was just for a few days that your mother would be fine, and you wouldn't need to worry about her in that regard.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The days leading up to when the application had to be handed in moved faster than you would have liked. Your house bustling with people trying to prepare for the procession and the first test. You had begun to hear about hidden tests, that mattered, but not everyone knew about. For example, there was a test within a ceremony. When the eligible women entered the Palace, they would need to stand on a pot lid, this was to send a message to the Kitchen God that a woman would be entering the family and to look after them, however, the secret test was that as they stood on the lid, if it moved they wouldn't be considered a good match, or "too heavy". This filled you with anxiety. Knowing that before you even took a step into the Palace, you would have already failed a secret test. In your heart, you just wanted to protect your family, for them to be proud of you. And the first test filled your mind with doubt.

Yeji and her family were also preparing for her to enter the castle. You had a feeling she was going to go much further than you, her beauty and intelligence and most of all her body type, getting her further than you could only dream of. Although sometimes you were jealous of your friend, you wished her nothing but happiness and luck with her future, especially if she became the royal bride.

The day before the procession, where the royal officers would attend each house, allowing the family to present their daughter, or rather their daughter within her palanquin, with the families servants ready to take her to join the procession towards the castle, you met up with Yeji.

When the two of you had found a sunny spot on a large wooden square bench area, where many would sit for picnics, you laid down, hand in hand. before you could stop it, the words blurted out of your mouth "are you scared?". Yeji turned her head towards you, her face contorted in confusion. "scared?" she repeated. "scared about leaving your family, about how your life will change when you proceed" you responded. "I wouldn't say scared, more nervous" she ended as you sat there and nodded. "I think you'll go just as far as I will, if not further" the woman continued, this time turning her whole body to face you, placing her free arm under her head. This comment made you laugh, as you turned your own body towards your best friend. the look that your friend gave you after your comment, had you shrinking slightly and offering her a small smile.

"your body may be different, but your soul shines through, you are the cleverest woman in town and everybody knows that. And if anyone says anything, I'll fight them. You are worth living in a cell for the rest of my life cheonsa", she spoke, her statement being followed with the most radiant smile you have ever seen in your life. The King would be a lucky man, when he took her as his bride, you thought, the image making your heart swell with love.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The very next day, in the early hours, when the sun has barely risen above the ground, you are woken up, both maids and your mother bustle around your room, packing away the last of your things as if you were going to be spending weeks away. Your mother smiles down at you when she sees your eyes open watching everyone around you.

"good morning sleepyhead" she chirps at you, with much more energy than someone should have at this time of day. Thankfully your father was nowhere to be seen, making you feel calm and relaxed, rather than anxious and stressed. A deep breath starts your day, as you pull yourself to stand up. A maid, who looks like she must be the daughter of one of the remaining maids that you could afford, rushes over to you, handing you a ceramic cup of water, with a bright smile on her face. You thank her with an equally big smile on your face, hoping to let her know that not everyone in your house was like your father. Your mother turns to look at you once again before continuing with what she was doing, what that was you weren't entirely sure of, "go get washed up nae salang/sarang, it's nearly time to get ready for the procession". You nod, moving towards the door, and to near the room that held the basin full of water, a large tub full of water and another basin, used for your bodily functions. Removing your night robes from your body, you step towards the bath, stepping in, sighing in comfort when the water was just as you loved it.

You weren't sure how long you had been in the bath when there had been a knock at the door. "Excuse me, ma'am, Madam says that you need to get out of the bath, wash your hair and face, and return to your room, as soon as possible" the voice from the other side of the door spoke. A soft smile found its way onto your lips. "Thank you Wonyoung" You responded, moving your hands to find the towel that had already been prepared for you when you entered. standing up, you hear the sound of water sloshing around you, the sound reminds you of the sea for some reason, and it makes you smile. you move the fabric around you before moving your hands to the bowl that is kept next to the bath for the purpose of washing your hair. Once your hand gripped onto the bowl, you placed the bowl in the water, still holding on to it, and then bend the top half of your body over the side of the bath. Once your hair was washed, you moved over to the basin that was full of water for you to wash your face with. You cup your hands in the water, letting the almost cold water calm you, before lifting your hands towards your face. you repeat this, 3 more times before using the small towel that was next to the basin to dry your face off. Catching your reflection in the small mirror that was hung on the bathroom wall, you send a small smile to the mirror you, almost as if you were wishing them luck. Holding onto your towel, and picking up your night clothes, you head back into your room, shocked when you just see your mother in the room, with your robes. "Come, let's get you ready for the procession, we don't have long," she says, patting the ground in front of her. you nod, sitting on the floor in front of her. she cups your face, before telling you to turn around so she could sort your hair.

You go to apply makeup before your mother cuts you off "agi, remember the first part of the selection, you aren't allowed any makeup or extravagant hairstyles". you sigh, your anxiety beginning to fill your body. You were already at a disadvantage due to your weight and now you couldn't even hide behind the makeup that you wore daily. "So I'm going to do a sweet braid, with a ribbon holding our family's crest okay, nae salang/sarang". All you could do was nod. Your mother continued telling you about the process for the day. When she got to the part where you would need to climb into the palanquin, your entire body froze, remembering that two men would have to carry your entire weight along with the weight of the palanquin, and just the thought of it filled you with so much anxiety you couldn't move.

"Don't worry agi, it's Chan and Changbin, carrying you, lovely boys, actually they offered to carry you themselves before we even asked anyone. If the process to become the royal bride doesn't go well, perhaps we can set up a marriage alliance with their clan." This calmed your racing mind slightly, the two boys from the Bang clan were the strongest in town and took great joy in showing off their strength. Always flexing their muscles when you were around in such a comical way, that it never failed to make you laugh from your belly. A sound not a lot of people in this town had heard. Finishing with knotting the ribbon to the braid, your mother clenches your shoulders, signalling you to stand up. She leaves the room briefly to allow you to get changed, before returning to help you tie the gorum as she did when you were younger and didn't know how to do it yourself.

Once you were fully dressed, your mother stands back, clutching a handkerchief in her fists. "my beautiful agi" she says, trying to subtly wipe away a small tear that had escaped her eye. Suddenly she perks up as if a lightbulb had appeared over her head. "Don't forget your application papers!" she says as she goes to a box in the corner of the room, grabbing the papers before returning to you.

"Let's get this application process started," you both say

The Seal of the Dragon

Chapter Four: Enter if you dare

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, bullying, loneliness, anxiety, money problems, mentions of how other people view characters body

message me if you feel I need more warnings

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The anxiety that filled you, as you felt the palanquin get closer to the Palace, was unlike any anxiety that you had ever felt in your life. All of your feelings hit you at once, and you were unable to decipher which feelings were good and which feelings were bad. A small laugh was heard outside the moving carriage, making you poke your head out to see what was happening.

"Put your head back in woman, I can feel your eyes in the back of my head" Chan laughs, your eyes widen in shock, wondering how he felt your eyes looking at him, as you had barely looked at him. You were beginning to wonder why you and your family had put this effort in, you all knew that it wouldn't go far. You couldn't help but let out yet another deep breath, hoping that this breath would suddenly magic away all the anxiety that your body held. The lively voices of the men you had grown up with continue outside, each of them laughing occasionally, which would make a small smile appear on your face. Especially when Changbin laughed, the noise never failed to make you smile no matter how you felt.

You poke your head out again, trying to be subtle as you didn't want another scolding from your friend. "Y/N, what are you doing?" changbin questions. You close your eyes, grimacing at the fact that you were caught again. Chan laughs loudly. "I was just trying to look for Yeji's palanquin," you said, smiling slightly at changbin. He smiles at you, seeing the anxiety in your eyes before responding "She's in the one ahead of the one in front of us". a sigh of relief leaves your lips, knowing that your best friend was near.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few more hours passed before you finally arrived at the Palace. You pull the small lilac fabric back slightly, eyes peering at your surroundings. A gasp leaves your lips, the sight before you leaving you feeling enchanted. The walls were high, and the gate to enter the Palace was made from bright red wood with a decorated top coloured with greens, blues, reds and even golds. There were cherry blossom trees lining the grey walls, the smell of them wafting gently through the air towards your nose. Guards were spaced out across the wall, but more guards were crowded by the gate, watching all of the participants enter the gates.

The guards wore hanboks in glorious red colour, with a belt in almost the same royal blue that you had seen the supreme Commissioner wearing a week before. It takes you a few moments to remember what the tall man's name was, it finally clicking when you think about that afternoon. Kim Seokjin was his name, it was quite fitting you thought. He was very handsome, so handsome that his aura felt ethereal to everyone who saw him. You wondered if you would see the man whose broad shoulders could clearly be seen under his hanbok.

Just moments later, you felt the dark box you were sitting in, come to a stop. Anxiety that you had briefly forgotten about when admiring the guards as they stood by the gate. A soft knock is heard on the wood next to you, making you jump in your spot. "We're here," Chan said, his voice low and almost authoritative, reminding you that you could only go onwards and couldn't run home like you wanted to. "Take a deep breath and come out eolin-i" Changbin adds. And that is what you do. Taking your skirt in your hands as elegantly as you can, you make to take your first step within the Palace grounds. A beautiful smell suddenly hits you once your full body was out of the uncomfortable box, almost reminding you of home. It was a scent that made you feel warm inside, it was the familiar scene of samgyetang, almost smelling just like how your mother at home made it. The smell makes a small appear from the corner of your lips. You catch eyes with Changbin, who knows what you're thinking as your mother frequently made it for the Bang clan with all the help they gave her and your family, and he smiles back at you.

'Maybe things will be okay' you think to yourself. Soon after a loud voice filled the open square. "Ladies, welcome" the voice began "Please move onto the squares that have been prepared on the floor and allow for your palanquin carriers to move it to your spot. The first test begins soon". You look around, seeing where everyone else was going, but during this you finally found Yeji, you subtly wave before taking your first step towards one of the biggest moments in your life. You take your place on a square almost directly in the middle of the square. You hear some people talking around you, and hoping it was Yeji or some of the nicer girls from town talking amongst each other, you try to listen into the conversation.

"Why is she even here, it's not like she'll even make it past the first test. The size of her would repel our Beloved King" one voice says. You feel your heart fall, your anxiety heightens and what once was a smile, turns into a frown. "Indeed, the poor Queen Dowager has to lay her eyes upon the elephant" another continues, making tears well up on your water line. Looking up to the sky, you try to blink away the tears, trying to ignore the two women behind you tearing down your self-confidence quicker than it took to light one of the Palace lanterns. "She's not even dressed to the right standard, how does she even think that she can even present herself in front of the Queen dowager. When I become Queen, I will put her in the dungeons, for committing such a crime to the Dowager" their hate continues, followed by a giggle of the other. Shock fills your system, making you wonder if she could actually do something like that.

Looking around, you noticed that every single other woman around you, Yeji included, was dressed to the best that their money could afford. Worry piles onto your already high pile of emotions that you were feeling. Would you even be allowed to enter the view of the Queen Dowager in your current outfit? But before you could stew on your thoughts even more than you already were, Chan and Changbin arrive next to you with your palanquin next to you, blocking you from the view of people on either side of you. The feeling of the men standing next to you made your anxiety ease slightly, but the feelings still piled high within your heart. You turn to look at the men and open your mouth to say something when another voice cuts you off.

"Welcome Ladies and manservants" the voice begins, this sentence making you turn to the boys and smirk at them slightly, letting them know that you would never let them forget what they had just been called. The giggle that was about to exit your throat, reminded you to look towards the front. And you were not disappointed when you did. Seeing the man that you had been thinking about earlier when you had begun your entrance into the Palace. "Today begins the beginning of the selection process for our King to find his future Queen. That lady being amongst the very people in front of me." He starts "To help me welcome you into the Palace, the Head Directorate Min Yoongi has joined me," he says and turns, his hand pointing towards the shorter man slightly behind him. Min Yoongi looked almost as ethereal as the Seokjin, He had long blonde hair, half tied up in a high ponytail, a black band wrapped around the top of his head. A long pink scar covered his right eye from above his eyebrow to just below his eye. The man was just as attractive as the broad-shouldered man and you knew that a part of him knew that he was attractive. Yoongi takes a step forward, places a small smile upon his lips, and bows slightly before taking a step back, putting him back into his previous position. Smiling, Seokjin continues "Now to begin the process" a pause fills the air "We will begin with the person on the left" he takes his hand and points to the woman to his left, smiling gently at her "You will begin, and the King would like you to announce your name, both family and your given name, your age and your family crest. Please begin".

The woman he had pointed to during his speech, takes a small step forward, bowing deeply to the Supreme Commissioner and Head Directorate, an elegant smile on her lips before announcing her name "Kim Si-Hyeon, 19, Wild Boar" she states, before bowing again and returning to her previous spot. This continues until it reaches you. You repeat the same process that all the women before you had done.

Take a deep breath.

Take a step forward.

Brightest smile.

Bow

"Seo Y/N, 22, tiger"

Bow again.

Step back.

Breathe again.

Once you had finished, you hear small giggles and scoffs from the hate-filled women behind you. You pay no mind to them and continue to listen to the women around you announce themselves. Your breath gets caught in your throat when it gets round to the women who had been spitting hatred at you, "Kim Seol-Hyun, 22, Rabbit", soon followed by "Kwon Eun-Bi, 22, Deer". The voices clashing straight into the memory of when you had attended the school in town to learn how to read and write. The voices that had moments ago filled your heart with hurt, were the same ones who had tried to bring you down when you were barely tall enough to reach the middle shelf in the town library. You feel your whole body freeze, before remembering that they can see you, and try to relax your body.

A few minutes later, all the women in the courtyard had announced their names, their age and their seal. Your anxiety peaked once again, as you remembered that the first test was about to begin. Seokjin stepped forward again, a formal smile graces his face, as he begins to say what the first test would be.

"Well, it is wonderful to meet you all. The first test is the Chogantaek. You will have to remove all your ceremonial robes, leaving you in your underdress', you must also remove ALL makeup and hair accessories. The only accessories allowed are Daenggi's and small headbands. Please also remove your shoes and beoseoh, then return to the spot that you are standing in. The Queen Dowager will arrive in a few moments and will be with her ladies, making her decision row by row. Once she has completed every row, she will confer for one hour with her ladies before announcing her selection. 15 of you will be going through. That is one from every row. On the rare occasion that the Queen Dowager makes a decision to have more than one from each row, we will process with them, however, know this rarely happens" Seokjin takes a step back, then nods his head towards a group of guards. The guards take their staffs, stomping them on the ground, yelling out and announcing the arrival of Queen Dowager.

The Queen Dowager enters, wearing the ceremonial red Wonsam. Her ladies in waiting also wearing their ceremonial clothing, the Dowager, however, stood out brightly among the rest. The sight of the woman took your breath away, your body subconsciously standing taller. The ladies surrounding the Dowager separated, moving to form a line behind the woman as she joined the Supreme Commissioner on the podium. Everyone bowed deeply before her.

"Good luck" was all she said, before moving off of the podium with her ladies. Moving to return to where she had previously stood. "Now ladies," Seokjin spoke, "Now is the time to enter your palanquins, remove your outer robes, accessories and jewellery and return to your spot". A moment is held in the air before the first women moved to their boxes, the rest following suit once the first had moved.

You move into your palanquin, leaving your hair braided with the daenggi tied in your hair. You undo the goreum, that held the two sides of your jeogori together, letting it slip off of your shoulders. You then take off your chima, before folding it and placing it on the seat that you had spent the last few hours sitting upon. A short anxious breath escapes from your lips before you leave your palanquin once again. You make eye contact with the boys standing near you, both of them throwing a thumbs up your way, making you feel slightly at ease.

More and more women entered back into the courtyard, standing where they once were. It only took a minute or two before everyone had returned. Another stomp is heard, along with the yells, before the Queen Dowager is standing in front of you all again. "As I stated earlier, we will be going row by row, starting with the first row." Seokjin states, before moving down the stairs at the front of the podium that you had not seen before, he turns, holding his hand up for the Dowager. She takes his large-looking hand, moving gracefully down the steps. The ladies who had come back out with her, moved in a row behind her, as the group moved to the woman who introduced herself first. The group began talking amongst themselves as they passed through each trio. Once they reached the end of each line, they would turn to each other, talking almost silently among each other, before turning back to Seokjin, mentioning something, he would write it down, and they would continue to the next row.

Your heart pounded inside your chest as she eventually reached your row. She began to the right of you, moving what felt both slow yet fast, closer and closer to you. She soon reached you. You bowed deeply to the woman in front of you, bowing as low as your body would possibly let you. "You may rise," she says, you bow your head, before returning to your standing position. "What is your name?" she asks you, staring into your eyes, making you feel nervous as you answer "Seo Y/N, Your Royal Highness" you respond. "Your age? And seal?" she questions "22, Your Royal Highness, and my seal is the tiger, My Queen" you finish. She lets out a small laugh, a sweet smile gracing her pink lips.

"Why do you want to become Queen?" The older woman continues her questions. You take a moment to respond, making the Queen Dowager raise her eyebrow slightly. "I want to make my family proud of me, to make a difference when and where I can" you answer finally. Your answer makes the woman smile. "A beautiful answer" she responds. Turning, nodding to her women, and continuing on to the woman next to you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Around 15 minutes later, all rows had been gone through, and now was the moment of truth. You would find out if you made it through to the next stage of the first test.

"When I call your name, please step forward" Seokjin starts, then looking down at his list, he beings

"Row one; Kim Si-Hyeon, Row two; Ahn So-Hee, Row three; Bae Suzy, Row four; Cho Mi-Yeon, Row five; Nam Da-Won Row six; Jung Eun-Bi, Row seven; Go Woo-ri" He counts, announcing each girl "Row eight" hearing your row makes your heart stop and your body freeze. "Hwang Yeji" a short pause follows "and Seo Y/n". If your heart hadn't stopped before when hearing your row, it definitely would have, hearing your name falling from the plump pink lips of the Supreme Commissioner.

You. Had. Passed.

"Row Nine; Kim Seol-Hyun AND Kwon Eun-Bi, Row ten; Han Sun-Hwa, Row Eleven; Lee Ji-Eun, Row twelve; Jang Won-Young, Row thirteen; Kang Mi-Na, Row Fourteen; Kim Si-Jeong, Row fifteen; Lee Hye-Ri" He finishes his list of names before returning his vision to the crowd. "Thank you to those who did not pass, your marriage ban has lifted, and we humbly ask for you to return to your cities, towns or villages. Those who did pass, please gather at the front, we will have men escort your palanquins and manservants to your accommodations and they will meet you there, as they will be assigned by the Queen Dowager once you have completed the next test". You wait a moment, turning to Chan and Changbin behind you muttering a quiet "see you later" to them, before placing your hands together and moving towards the front. On your way, however, the women who you had identified as your childhood bullies, decide to bash their shoulders into yours, making you nearly fall to the ground, a small hand catches you, making you turn around. You see Yeji glaring at the women in front of you. Clasping onto her hand, you straighten yourself up, trying to ignore the pink flush that has risen to your cheeks in embarrassment.

"Wonder how fatty got through," the taller bully says to the shorter one, the other quickly responding "must have bribed her, there's no other way someone of her size would have gotten through to this second part"

"The same could be said about you, don't you think," Yeji says, speaking again before they could open their mouths "you must have had a pretty big bribe to get through, there's no way the Queen Dowager would allow someone as spiteful and rude as you through her walls otherwise". A short silence is held between the four of you before Yeji grips your hand and pulls you to the front.

"Congratulations on passing the first half" Min Yoongi begins speaking surprising you all. "The second half of the test begins in a few moments. We ask that you enter through that door, single file, to enter the smaller courtyard where the test is set up for you. Each of you will take a spot in front of a tray. Once you reach your tray, you will see a stick. Use this to right your father's name, before taking your stick, placing it next to it, and standing behind it with your tray. More instructions will follow". Smiling towards Yeji, you both let go of each other's hands, you stand just behind her as you walk to the door that the blonde-haired man had pointed to during his explanation. Close to the door, you saw the pot lid that you knew you would need to stand on. The sight of it, makes your stomach turn, anxiety spike and your fingers clasp at each other in anxiety. The first girl goes, and steps on it, it doesn't move, and she carries on. The process continues until it reaches you. You stand in front of it, place the middle of your foot on the handle, place as little weight on it as you can, and then place your other foot on the front side of the pan. To your surprise, the lid does not move. This makes you let out a small breath, with a quiet laugh of surprise. You carry on towards the smaller square that had been mentioned. Here you see another man standing on the podium, alongside the dowager and her women.

Taking a spot next to Yeji at the end of the row, you crouch down as elegantly as you could, trying to remember all the lessons your mother taught you on how to be as ladylike as possible doing things that most times aren't considered ladylike. Briefly looking up, you notice that most of the other girls are hesitant to crouch down as you were, especially Seol-Hyun and Eun-bi. The sight of this makes you smile slightly to yourself, picking up the stick that was on the tray. You're about to write your father's name, when you realised your tray was in the way, so you move it, before writing your father's name in hangeul. Then you take the tray that you had placed to the side, standing up and waiting for the next instructions.

Whilst the others finish writing their father's names on the ground, another young man who you don't recognise walks around with a piece of hanji in his hand and a long black writing brush in his hand, writing something down about the writings that had been finished.

"We will begin the next part of the test. I have had another person go around and write who completed their task first, and this test will be going in order of who finished it first. Once the name has been called out, that person will come to the podium with their tray, they will have a pot of tea, and six very special tea cups placed on their tray. You will need to take the filled tray to the Queen Dowager and her ladies and serve them tea. You are being judged on your basic etiquette. Once this is completed, you will return to your spot." the unknown man speaks. "Once everyone has completed this test. You will be assigned to the accommodations, that our gracious Queen Dowager has selected for each of you. Good Luck, let's begin. Seo Y/n"

As your heart pounds in your chest, you take your tray in both hands, keeping it as straight as possible, moving towards the podium. Once you reach the podium you wait at the steps, "you may enter the podium" the man who had given you instructions tells you. You knew more than anything that right now, you would need to rely on your manners and etiquette more than your style, hoping that these would shine through to the Queen Dowager. Taking one step at a time until you reached the top, you tried to remind yourself to breathe in and out. It takes mere seconds for you to reach the man at the top of the podium. You bow, again as low as you can, to the man in front of you He nods his head briefly back at you, before nodding to the men to the side, themselves holding teapots and teacups. They begin to come over to you, placing the teapot and teacups on your tray. You bow slightly towards them, careful not to tip the tray over. Once all the items were on the tray, you took a careful first step towards the Queen Dowager and her ladies in waiting. It took only a few steps before you reached their table. You tried to place the tray down on the table in the centre as you could before kneeling in front of the table. Bowing once more to the Queen Dowager, and then bowing slightly higher to the Queen's ladies, you took the teapot off of the tray, holding it with both hands, careful not to let any spill. You place it down, before moving to take the teacups. First the Queen Dowager, then the ladies next to her, slowly going out more and more until you reached the ladies on the end. Retaking the teapot, you pick it up before returning to the Queen Dowager "Would you like some tea, Your Royal Highness?" You ask. She nods her head slightly at you, letting you pour her tea. You make sure not to pour too much tea, but enough to fill the teacup to a reasonable standard, trying to remember all the lessons your mother had taught you growing up. You turn to the lady next to her, asking her the same question, repeating the process until each lady had a tea. After the final lady had received her teacup of tea, you return the teapot to the tray, bowing once more before you stand up. "Please enjoy your tea Your Royal Highness and her gracious ladies" you state. You take a step to the right before turning and moving back towards where the unknown man was standing.

Once you do, the man nods to the menservants to come back over, and they do, taking the teapot from you. "Please return to your spot," the man says, you nod and bow towards the man, descending the stairs and returning to your spot.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It took what felt like an age before everyone had finished, some spilling their tea on the floor in nervousness, one girl even breaking a teacup before she could even reach the Queen Dowager. However, worst of all was one of the ladies, whose name you found out to Jung Eun-bi, from the sixth row, spilt her tea and broke a teacup between the Queen Dowager and the lady next to her. It finally came to the time when it would be announced who would pass through to the next round. The square fell silent once again when the still un-named man spoke again.

"I feel that it is time for introductions into who myself and the other man are. My name is Jung Hoseok, the young man who was walking around earlier is Jeon Jungkook. Our jobs, respectively, are The Chief Councillor and High Councillor. The Queen Dowager and her ladies have come to the decision on the ladies she would like to pass through onto the next stage, which is called Jaegantaek, and those who passed will receive further instructions as to what it is. However, now is time to talk about the ladies who passed.". The other man who you could now identify as Jeon Jungkook, came forward "Those who did pass, please make a formerly line at the front. Those of you who have not passed, please return to your manservants and return to your homes. Your marriage ban has been lifted and we thank you for your cooperation within the process."

" Kim Si-Jeong" one.

"Bae Suzy" two.

"Cho Mi-Yeon" three.

"Hwang Yeji" four.

"Kim Seol-Hyun" five.

"Han Sun-Hwa" six

"Kwon Eun-Bi" seven.

Shit. That's seven. There was barely ever more than that. It was such an unheard-of occasion for it to actually be more than seven. And your name wasn't part of that seven. Do you feel relieved or happy? Yeji sends a small smile your way before moving into the line. Your bullies send you a smirk and walk smugly over to the line.

"And on a very rare occasion, we have an eighth candidate" Jung Hoseok lets the information fill the air, everyone taking a breath.

"Seo Y/n"

Chapter Five- Royal Residences Part One

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, bullying, loneliness, anxiety, money problems, mentions of how other people view characters body

message me if you feel I need more warnings

3.4k words

You made your way to the front, the sound of your name, leaving nearly everyone shocked but your best friend, who had the biggest grin on her beautiful face. No one had expected you to get through, not even yourself. A blush blankets your face as you make your way to the line at the front. A moment passes as everyone waits for the ladies who did not get through to leave the smaller courtyard.

"Congratulations ladies" you hear Hoseok speak, breaking the silence, whilst looking over each and every one of you. You don't know if you were just imagining it, but the tall and handsome man had sent an almost imperceptible smile your way, making your eyes go wide. "Now, myself and Jungkook will tell you your residences, and we will also assign you 2 maids and a manservant for you to use at your convenience"

"Let's start with the furthest away from this little courtyard shall we?" Jungkook questioned, though the question was rhetorical.

"Bae Suzy, You are in the Sapphire Apartment. Along with the manservants, you brought along with you, you are also being assigned Shin Won-ho as your manservant and Kim Tae-Yeon and Chou Tzu-yu as your maids. Please proceed to your apartment"

"Next we have the Chariote Apartment, the person who will be staying there is Han Sun-Hwa. You are being assigned Lee Jong-Hyun, Jeon So-Yeon and Kwon Yu-Ri. Please proceed."

The process carried on.

"Ruby Apartment is for Hwang Yeji, You are assigned Kang Dong-Ho, Ahn Sol-Bin and An Yu-Jin. Please proceed.

"Opal Apartment. Kim Seol-Hyun. Woo Ji-Ho, Son Chae-Young, Cho Seung-Hee"

"Carnelian Apartment. Kwon Eun-Bi. Yoo Ki-Hyun, Lee Hae-in and Lee Young-Yoo"

"Amber Apartment. Choi Mi-Young. Doh Kyung-Soo, Bae Woo-He, Baek A-Yeon"

"Azurite Apartment. Kim Si-Jeong. Lee Byung-Hun, Go Woo-Ri and Park Hye-Won"

At this point, everyone had left apart from you. "Miss Seo, as you were an unexpected candidate, your apartment is still getting ready and the maids needed a few more moments, so we were trying to prolong this for as long as possible. You have been assigned Moon Jong-Up, Ahn Hye-Jin who goes by Maria or Hwa-Sa and Jun Hyo-Seong. I hope that they treat you well. To prolong this even longer as we have not received the signal that they are ready, we are going to give you a tour, are you okay with that?" The pair asked.

"Perfectly." You responded. "It would be my honour" You carried on with a smile. "Please, Lead the way". The two young men smiled at you, before moving down the stairs towards you. Suddenly, you felt incredibly nervous, these incredibly attractive young men were looking directly at you, with no signs of distate anywhere on their faces or bodies. The men took a space on either side on your, Hoseok moving his arms to point the way out of the courtyard. "Do you have a flower that you appreciate the most?" Jungkook asked "Good question Kookie" Hoseok said, the nickname making your eyes widen again, almost not expecting the men to be so close that they were using nicknames. "We might have your favourite here in one of the gardens"

"Cherry blossoms, Chief State Councillor and High Councillor. My most appreciated flower of all is Cherry Blossom." The two men share a look between each other. "That is our Gracious King's favourite, so much that he has a garden dedicated to it, coincidentally, the garden is right next to your apartment" A small gasp left your lips, the excitement evident not just on your face but on your whole body as you turned to both of them, your hands clasping together joyfully. "Really!?! Can we go there?" You asked hopefully. Both men smiled at your excited state before telling you that you could, and led the way, right to the entrance of the garden. There was a small bridge to cross before you would actually be in the park, and you ran quickly across it, accidentally forgetting about the two men behind you. You span round quickly, a giant smile on your face, trying to look everywhere at everything.

"I take it that you like the garden," a voice behind you, which you quickly identified as Hoseok, spoke. "Almost more than anything in the world," You said without thinking. Both men let out a laugh, which made you look at them with a questioning gaze. "You have almost the same reaction as the Good King". This very sentence made you stop in your spot, your face dropping, looking almost horrified to be compared to the King. "Omo, I am not worthy of being compared to our gracious King" You spoke, anxiously wringing your hands together. "My apologies Lady Seo, we didn't mean to make you anxious," Jungkook said. You noticed a young woman run up to the two men and yourself. She spoke quietly to the men, before bowing and turning away. The two men turned to you, smiling slightly "Your apartment is ready Lady Seo, let us lead you there" Hoseok said. Nodding, you spoke gently "Please do lead the way". You bow gently, allowing the men to turn around and lead the way out of the garden that you had fallen in love with, and almost didn't want to leave.

It took barely two minutes before you arrived in front of the apartment. "This is the Emerald apartment. Next to you, there is the Queen Dowager's Garden, you are not allowed to enter that space without her explicit permission" Jungkook stated sternly. "And on your other side is Lady Hwang" Hoseok finished. This made you smile, your apartments here, being closer to each other than the houses in your town were. "Lady Hwang Yeji is my best friend," You spoke gently, a small but warm smile on your face at the mention of your best friend. "We have known each other since we were born, my eomma likes to say that I have two sets of parents, both our parents raised both of us..." you paused, your smile turning into a frown "well my eomma and Yeji's parents, my appa..." you spoke again, your frown becoming bigger. "You don't need to tell us, Lady Seo" Hoseok said calmly, laying a gentle hand on your shoulder. You look up, and into the handsome man's eyes, your eyes slightly blurry with tears, making something flash in Hoseok's eyes. "I feel like I almost need to" you spoke "My appa, he used to be a good man, until he fell from grace, he lost a lot of his respect, and therefore money, and the money he did keep, he used to drink. He would blame me for his drinking, he would tell me it was my fault, that he wished it was I who died and not my sister. Before I left, he attacked me for the first time, he dragged me by my hair to the floor and yelled at me. My eomma, she's a wonderful woman, she grabbed him by the ear and dragged him out of the house once she realised he was in my room and harming me. Appa had a bruise on his ear still, when I left for the procession. My bruises still remain intact too, but when I remember what my eomma did, the fire in her eyes, I feel proud to be her descendant" You finally finished your story.

You could see anger clearly on both men's faces. "I know I need not worry about my eomma whilst I'm here, she is as fierce as the summer in the sky in the summer sky." The warm smile lay on your lips, remembering your eomma. "She sounds like a wonderful woman" Jungkook spoke, a smile that could be perceived as genuine if there were someone looking on from the outside in.

"Anyway's my Chief Councillor and High Councillor, I must leave your warm presence and settle myself into my apartments. I hope to see you soon Your Honours. May the sun warm your cheeks, and the food fills your bellies" You speak eloquently, bowing low before the two handsome men, before turning and leaving their presence to enter your apartments.

The apartment that you entered was spacious and homely. In the room stood your friends Chan and Changbin with large grins on their faces, along with your assigned manservant and maids.

"My Lady, Your room is this way, would you like me to help you redress" Hyo-Seong spoke, her hand pointing to an area separate from the room you all stood in. The room was separated from the room you were in by a wall of sliding doors. The entire apartment was decorated in green and brown, the sliding doors were made of oak, and the cloth was painted with the seal of the kingdom in the colours your apartment was named after. It was a beautiful sight to behold, and you knew that if you had any spare time, you would ask your maids to retrieve any painting items they could get a hold of so that you could show this image to your eomma when you got home again. You knew that she would take great delight in your painting, and knowing how an apartment within the royal castle looked and would love the painting even more so, knowing it came from her daughter.

"That would be lovely Miss Jun" you spoke to the woman. She nodded her head as a slight bow, walking to the room you now identified as your bedroom. In the room, there was a large box placed near the window, on top of it was a new hanbok ready for you to wear. "Would you like a bath Lady Seo?" Hyo-Seong asked. You shook your head, a feeling of exhaustion coming over you in a quick wave. "Do you think it would be possible to sleep for a short period Miss Jun?" You asked hopefully. "Unfortunately not, My Lady, there is much to do. As you have reached the second stage, you must prepare for a meeting with Queen Dowager. You will soon also be accepting gifts from the royal family, of which I am unsure, but you must prepare to receive them. We must also start preparing you for your interview, and the luncheon that is happening tomorrow. There is also a Royal Banquet that we must prepare you for. I assume you have attended a banquet before, but a royal banquet is much more different to the ones of the high class" The maid in front of you explained your schedule for the coming potential one to two weeks that you would be residing in a royal apartment.

"Very well, then we must begin," You say a small polite smile on your face. "What's first?" you ask. "First My Lady, we must dress you," she says, returning your attention back to the box that had caught your attention when you first walked into the room. You didn't recognise the hanbok, remembering all the ones that you owned. "I apologise, but this is not my hanbok," you tell your maid "No My Lady, the Queen Dowager sent this. It's the first gift from the royal family." Excitement fills your body, knowing that this was something that the Queen Dowager herself had someone make and be sent. "But only 6-7 were predicted, and I'm not the average size", you questioned slightly, the anxiety that you had felt earlier in the day returning in full force. "The Queen Dowager had this one sent specifically, it was a hanbok she had in her storage, she wore it when she was pregnant with the King. She sent a letter along with it" you were told before being handed the letter

Dear Lady Seo,

The Royal Family apologises for not having anything prepared for you. I did not have a gift prepared for you, however, your crest is a crest that has a long line, and the crest on your hanbok is a phoenix. This was my family crest before I married King Sejong, the King's late father. It was a hanbok I wore when I was pregnant with the King. I hope that it does you well, as it is now yours. Please meet me in my gardens at 3.

Sincerely,

Her Royal Highness, The Queen Dowager Kim Eun-Ji

"What time is it?" You ask loudly, waiting for anyone in the household to respond. "2:30" you hear someone yell, unsure of who it was due to the closed doors between you. You feel your face pale. Turning to your maid you speak again "We must hurry, please call Miss Ahn in, time is not on our side". The maid nods, before running the door and calling in the other woman.

Within 20 minutes, your hair had been brushed and moved into a restyled updo, behind held back with a purple dwikkoji, your under clothes being changed for cleaner ones, and then the gifted hanbok was placed onto your body. It fit almost like a glove like it was made for you. The jeogori was a gorgeous dark purple colour, decorated with golden detailing featuring a phoenix, the goreum was also in an off-gold colour. The chima was a black colour with the same golden detail. Your beoseons were black as well as your shoes which were decorated in the same gold detailing. With a few minutes to spare, your maids applied some basic makeup consisting of plant ash to apply a dark brown colour to your eyebrows, safflower was used to apply a light rouge to your lips and cheeks and cherry blossom petals took right from the very cherry blossom garden you had just been in (it was a perfume that was on the dressing table when you got here, you had just assumed it was a gift everyone received) mixed with water was used to make a delicious spelling perfume.

With exactly 10 minutes left before the Queen Dowager wanted to see you, you left your apartment, your manservant Moon Jong-Up directing you, almost acting as your guard as well as your guide. When you arrived outside the Queen Dowagers garden, which only took moments as you quickly found out was right next to your apartment, Mr Moon stepped aside to let you enter first, before following you slightly behind, allowing you to look like you had found the garden yourself.

It doesn't take long to notice the Queen Dowager, it shocked you slightly when you saw that she was wearing the same colours just the other way around. The lady in front of you turns towards you, hearing your footsteps. She waits at the top of the stairs of the Pavilion she was standing in. Once you reach the bottom of the stairs, you bow as low as possible to the elegant woman before you. "You're early Lady Seo" the woman speaks. "My apologies Your Majesty, I was excited to meet you once again." You speak, not allowing your nerves to take over your anxiety.

“Don’t be, it is a good thing for a woman to have, to have time management perfected, especially for a woman. Especially for a woman who may be the future mother of the kingdom, the future queen.” She says, her very words making you blush.

“You speak of me too highly My Queen,” you say. “I am eternally grateful for your gracious gift. The fabric is the softest thing I have ever had touch my skin. If there is anything I can do to show my thankfulness, please allow me to do it. Would you like some tea, Your Royal Highness?” you ask, noticing the teapot and teacups whilst you were looking around in nervousness. 

“You need not worry Lady Seo, this is no longer a test, you do not need to pour my tea for me,” she says, her voice full of authority, before nodding slightly to a man that you almost hadn’t seen when you entered the pavilion. “You intrigue me, Lady Seo, you are so unlike the other candidates, both in looks and mentality. Most of your candidates, when I had asked them why they were doing this, responded with generic answers” she speaks “For his Royal Highness the King’s happiness, to get to know you Your Highness” she carries on, her voice changing to mimic the people she was speaking about, at the sound of her change in voice you let out a giggle, covering your mouth. “But your answer, it was different, you wanted to make your family proud. This was something I wanted when I was a candidate to marry the King's late father” she finishes, the words turning the mood serious once more. A lady, small and almost meek approached the table, taking the teapot and pouring tea into both the cups on the table, before retreating to her spot against the wall of the garden. “You have a beautiful garden My Queen,” you tell her trying to achieve the once jovial mood the pavilion had a matter of minutes ago. “I spent a few brief minutes in the cherry blossom garden, and I truly believe that it was the happiest moment of my life,” you tell her, allowing the smile to fill your face as your mind retrieves the memory you were talking of. 

“The King’s favourite spot is also in the cherry blossom garden, he begged his father to plant the trees when he was still King, persuading him by telling him that he would propose to his future queen in that very garden,” the Queen Dowager tells you, allowing you a little into the past of the King, who you were yet to set eyes upon. 

Before thinking, you blurt out “Were you scared when you made the application to become the late King Se-Jeong’s wife?” A few moments pass, and just as you go to open your mouth to apologise, the dowager stops you. “I was, in fact, I was terrified, to tell you the truth, I never wanted it, but I needed to do it for the pride of my family. I was lucky that I fell in love with the King eventually, and we had a good, long and happy life,” she answers with a small smile on her face, reminiscing on the memories of her past. “I actually have a few questions for you myself if you don't mind”

“It would be my honour to answer your questions My Queen” you respond, nervousness filling your body even more. 

“The king is very… uh… close with his closest men. Would that be a problem with you?” she starts. “Of course not, if our Great King is happy, then I myself shall be happy,” you respond, hoping your answer satisfies her. She nods, with a small hum of approval. 

“And concubines? What are your opinions on the concubines?” she continues her questioning. 

You pause, this was something you had thought about. “Well My Queen, I have a feeling that if I was ever to become Queen, the other two candidates that would have gotten through, would be my school bullies-” the queen cuts you off after hearing of your bullies “Your bullies are in the palace?” She questions with an eyebrow raised. 

“Yes Your Highness, Kim Seol-Hyun and Kwon Eun-Bi, their apartments are Carnelian and Opal if I remember correctly”, the Queen Dowager nods again. “So what would you do if you became Queen and them the concubines?” She asks, her interest even more peaked. 

“Part of me would want to through them into the dungeons like they had threatened they would do with me earlier today. Another part of me would want all of the king's concubines gone but the biggest part of me wants the King to be happy, and if the concubines make My Great King happy, then I shall live with the concubines.” The Queen Dowager looks almost shocked. “The Kings happiness, at the end of the day, will always be my source of happiness, whether I get through to the final round, or I don’t. The King, from what I have heard in rumours spread across cities and towns, near and far, is that when the King is happy, the land thrives, and the people are well. My family are part of his people, and as well as making them proud, I desperately want them to be happy… even my father.” you tell her.

“Your father?"

The Seal Of The Dragon Masterlist

Chapter One - Trials and Tribulations Chapter Two - Taking the Plunge Chapter Three - The Application Chapter Four - Enter If You Dare Chapter Five - Royal Residences Pt 1 Royal Residences Pt 2 Royal Residences pt 3 Chapter Six - The Royal Announcement Chapter Seven- The Move Chapter Eight- Cherry Blossom Courtyard

Extras: What Words Mean Seokjin's Gift Yoongi's Gift Hobi's Gift Jimin's Gift Taehyung's Gift Jungkooks Gift Namjoon's Gift Taglist

Chapter Five- Royal Residences Part 2

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, bullying, loneliness, anxiety, money problems, mentions of how other people view characters body

message me if you feel I need more warnings

3,098 Words

There will be small blurbs following this for the next few days, letting you know what the gifts they receive from each of the boys, each boy getting their own blurb.

"Your father?"

“Indeed, my Queen” you started, taking a slow breath, trying to work up the courage to discuss your father with the intrigued woman in front of you. “My father used to be a good man. A kind man even. But then we lost a lot of money in one go, and he turned to drink. He would waste away the money we did have every night, and when he would come home…” you felt your eyes begin to water, but you couldn’t allow yourself to cry in front of the Queen Dowager. “The night before I left to begin this process, my father attacked me for the first time” you tried carrying on. The look on the woman’s face turned from intrigue to horror within seconds, flashes of anger passing through her eyes, which she tried to hide away from you with quick blinks. 

“He attacked you?” The Dowager responded, trying to keep her voice stable, not wanting to make you more upset than you already clearly were.

“I had come home with the application and had told him that all eligible ladies had to apply. He did not want me to. He knew the money he used on drinking would have to go towards the preparations, and he wasn’t happy with that. I feel I may have aggravated him slightly however, he had told me that I wasn’t permitted to apply for this process, and I told him that he had no say in it, that the king himself requested it, and the repercussions that we would face if we didn't. And he quickly fell silent in anger. My mother on the other hand quickly began preparations, trying to raise my confidence in myself. We were meant to have dinner that night with a family we were friends with, my best friend, she's even here, as part of the process." you began your story

"She's here?" the Queen Dowager probed

"Hwang Yeji, my Queen" you responded. The Queen Dowager nodded in recognition. Her silence queuing you to speak once again

"so my mother had sent me to my room to begin sorting out my hair and readjusting my clothes for dinner. And that is what I had started doing when I heard a knock on the door. I stupidly assumed it was just my mother, as she's the only one usually to knock on my door. My father usually only spoke to me in distaste, blaming me for his drinking, that it was all my fault, and that he was using this money for my future. I still don't know what he meant by that" you carried on, letting out a dry laugh. The Queen Dowager showed a tight smile.

"It was never your fault. I hope you know that" she told you.

"You sound like my eomma," you told the older woman, looking at her and giving her a small smile, the dowager responding with a similar smile. A small silence passed again, letting you carry on your story.

"Anyways, he had stormed in, his voice was this weird level where it wasn't yelling but it wasn't speaking at a normal decibel. I remember every word he told me that night. Every. Single. One." the tears welling in your eyes again. "how dare you tell me that I have no choice in this matter, I am the parent, not you, DO NOT treat me as a child" 

Remember to take a breath a voice inside you reminded you. So you took a deep breath, continuing your story "He grabbed what was left of the braids that were still in, and yanked on them slightly, and then he yanked it even further and threw me to the floor by my hair" your voice wavered as you began to cry. but you carried on "He began yelling "I am the man of this house" he had yelled in my face" you wipe a tear that had made its way to your chin "and then he continued "I make the rules, not a fat little girl who won't even make it past the first stage" and then his voice returned to normal before he grabbed my hair and told me the thing that hurt the most" more tears fell down your face, you couldn't even look at the Dowager. "He grabbed my hair for the final time and got so close to my face I could smell the beer that he had drunk earlier in the day and said "I wish you were never born, you should have died, not your sister. You're a disgrace" and then he shoved my head into the ground again"

"But, no matter what he has done, he is still my father. I still love him, despite his aggression towards me. At the end of the day, I have always wanted him to tell me that he was proud of me, though I know that will never happen. I just hope that by getting this far, by doing this much, maybe just maybe, he will be proud of me, even if he doesn't say so" you finished. You heard the Dowager taking a deep breath and sniffing slightly, trying to subtly wipe away the tears that had fallen during your story. She turned towards you more and took your hands in her own. A knowing smile on her lips. "I went through a similar thing to yourself before I became the Queen," she told you "my father was a heavy drinker, and although we didn't lose our money, he just didn't treat me the way he treated my siblings. He would always tell me when others couldn't hear that I was a disappointment and that anything that went wrong for our family was my fault" her story began. You could almost picture the woman in front of you, younger and looking the same way you had just weeks before.

"He never physically abused me, the dressers I had would have seen it and reported it to my mother, who would have been beyond furious with my father. My mother never knew about what he told me on a daily basis either. At least that's what I tell myself, it's the only way I can heal" her story carried on, "But when Namjoon could speak, he would always run up to me and call me the 'Bestest eomma in the world' and it was always he kind words that made me so happy and allowed me to slowly heal. Healing is a slow process that only you and time can heal. You are worth more than what your father told you and I hold hope for you and what you can do in the future. I almost see me in you" her words spilt out of her mouth, her hands still holding yours tightly in her own. “Would you like to join a luncheon between my ladies and me tomorrow afternoon?” the Queen Dowager suddenly blurted out. 

“Me?” You responded quickly, shock evident on your face at the Dowager’s question. “Are you questioning me?” the Dowager retorted “Of course not!” You quickly responded “I just cannot believe that you want me to attend an event as prestigious as a luncheon between the Dowager and her ladies. It is an event well spoken of throughout the kingdom” you explained. 

“My dear I was only jesting. I can understand your shock” she laughed “Meet my guards, any one of the four, and don’t worry, I’ll have someone write their names down for you, in front of my apartment tomorrow, they will bring you to the luncheon. Wear something purple, chin-aehaneun, I truly believe that it is to be your colour” she said. “Now, let us finish our tea before dinner is to be served” she grinned, the happy twinkle back in her eyes. She guides your hands back to your teacup and lets go of them once they reached where she wanted. You smiled back, lifting your teacup to your lips, letting the sweet liquid ease down your throat. This had to be the best tea that you had ever had the pleasure of drinking. You look around you, finally taking in the beauty that surrounded you, allowing a content sigh to leave your lips. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * 

Anxiety ran through you again the next day when you were ready and leaving your apartment to find the Queen Dowager’s guard. Once again, it took only a few minutes to arrive at the Dowager’s apartment. This time, you walked past her personal garden and to the front of her apartment. And when you did, you saw two people, one man and one woman, both beautiful. 

Before you could reach the beautiful people ahead of you, you heard a voice that immediately changed your mood. 

“Don’t you think it’s a bit desperate to be hanging around the Dowager’s apartment?” Kwon Eun-Bi snarled. 

“As if she would want to even be in your presence” Kim Seol-Hyun continued.

What none of you realised, however, was that the two guards you had previously been approaching, had been listening in to the conversation. And that they would definitely be relaying this to their boss, the Dowager. 

“As fun as this conversation is, I’m afraid I have someplace to be. If you’ll excuse me” You respond, keeping your voice calm and composed despite the anxiety heightening inside your mind and body. 

“Oh please, be our guest” they responded sarcastically. Pretending to be letting you go from their conversation. You begin to move away from them, truly thinking that they were letting you go. But before you could even take two steps forward, one of the ‘lovely’ ladies had stuck their foot out, tripping you over. Seeing you on the floor, they giggled and walked off.

Seeing that the two ladies had finally walked off, the two other people there, ran towards you on the ground. 

“Lady Seo! Are you okay?” A female voice said, making you look up from your place on the floor. Entranced by her beauty, you forget to respond. The woman in front of you becoming more worried about your lack of response. “Lady Seo?” She asked again shaking you out of your trance, reminding you to nod your head. Both of the people standing, let out a huff of laughter at your response to them. The woman, whose name you didn’t know, offered you her hand, and you took it, letting it help you to stand. 

“Thank you, Lady…” you spoke, hoping that she would tell you who she was, that she would take your hint. She smiled, bowing deeply to you before speaking “I am no lady, Lady Seo, my name is Kim Hyun-ah, and this is my husband Kim Hyo-Jong, but everyone calls him Dawn.” hearing his name, Dawn bows deeply with a smile on his face. 

Dawn finally speaks “We're here to bring you to the Queen Dowager’s luncheon. Would you be okay with me using this handkerchief to dust you off Lady Seo?” the man asks, waiting for your consent before doing anything. You nod slightly, a blush covering your face. The man pulls a handkerchief from his pocket and uses it to wipe off the sand and dust that had covered your chima due to your ‘fall’. It took a few moments before he had wiped it all from your clothing. Well, he had wiped most of it, not daring to go near your chest area. He passes the handkerchief to you “There is some on your chest my lady” he says. “Thank you,” you say, taking it from his hands with both of yours, trying to show your respect, not knowing their age. Using it, you wiped off the last of it, that had been laying on your chest. 

“Beautiful Lady Seo” Kim Hyun-ah speaks, a large smile covering her angelic-looking face. “Let us go,” she said, taking Dawn's hand, before briefly turning to you “And please call me Hyuna” turning back, she begins walking towards a building you had not yet been into. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * 

The luncheon, once you had arrived, had gone very well. You had even been invited to another one the day after. This process happens for the next four days, each time, you enjoy yourself more and more, allowing yourself to open up about the subjects that mattered the most to you, to the ladies who found themselves resonating with you. On the fifth day, the Queen Dowager decided to skip the luncheon that day, and as much as you enjoyed the luncheons, you desperately wanted to revisit the cherry blossom garden that you had entered on your first day in the palace. 

So this is how you spent your day, happily pondering around the cherry blossom garden. You wore a pale pink jeogori, with a slightly darker goreum. Your chima was the same colour as your goreum, and you had a cherry blossom tree embroidered onto the back of the jeogori, your beoseon’s were white, as were your gomusin’s, though they did have the delicate detail of cherry blossoms engraved across the fabric. You even had a pale pink parasol with painted cherry blossom petals painted across it. This outfit made you feel confident and happy and you couldn’t wait to spend the day in it, walking around the most beautiful place you had ever seen. 

What you didn’t know, was that one of the kings closest men was sitting on a palladiom, painting the scenery before him, before he noticed you wandering around. And before the man had known it, he had painted you, so engrossed in you and your beauty that he didn’t notice that one of his boyfriends had wandered up behind him. 

“I hope you’ve gotten her consent to paint her nae sarang, it’s a bit creepy otherwise” the older man joked. 

“Taehyung! OMO! You made me jump!” the young man said, grateful that his paintbrush hadn’t been on the paper when he had jumped. 

“Sorry Kookie. Your painting is exquisite. You have captured a beauty, I know the other boys will appreciate the… scenery” Taehyung snickered making Jungkook blush. “Anyways, aegi, I have things to do” he grins, his smile boxy. “Maybe you can paint me in with ‘things’” he says before winking and walking off before the younger man could realise what he was on about. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * 

Whilst staring across the small lake infront of you, you registered steps heading towards you. Not wanting to be a bother to anyone and risk being kicked out of the beautiful area, you put your head down, staring at the water just ahead of you. 

“You must be one of the King’s candidates. I haven’t seen you yet. What’s your name?” the unknown man said, making you finally look up. ‘What was it with everyone in this palace being so ATTRACTIVE’ you thought to yourself. The man infront of you had deep brown hair, swept across his forehead, allowing you to see his milk chocolate brown eyes that sparkled in the sun. His jaw was as sharp as the swords that the guards around the kingdom carried. And finally, you noticed his large boxy smile, waiting happily for you to respond. 

“Indeed I am sir, Lady Seo, pleasure to meet you” you spoke, your voice surprisingly clear, and after your brief introduction, you bow deeply to the man. 

“A beautiful name for a beautiful lady, how is most comfortable for me to address you?” he asks, shocking you into silence once again. The first silence was due to his attractiveness, the second due to his words. 

“Y/N, if that pleases you my Lord” you respond, a gentle smile on your lips. 

“And how old are you… y/n” his questions continue. 

“24 sir”

“Ah. So that makes you my…” his sentence begins, a smirk working its way onto his face “noona”

His words make you cough out a breath, blush taking over every part of your face that it could. 

“If that is what my lord would prefer to call me, i can only oblige to his request” you almost stutter out, making the man throw his head back in laughter. 

“Would you like to go for a walk noona?” he asks, making the blush that had been receding, return. 

“I can’t think of a better way to spend an afternoon my Lord” you respond, your words almost sounding like flirtation. 

“Please, call me Tae” he responds, offering up his arm to the shorter woman. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * 

The two thoroughly enjoyed their walk, bonding over various topics, jokes flowing between them, laughter filling the air. They had quickly become friends. 

Before either of them knew it, nightfall had arrived and it was time for dinner in the hall once again. 

“May I accompany you to the dining hall noona?” Tae asks, turning slightly to you, waiting for your answer. 

“The dining hall? Of course you can. I have been looking forward to dinner for the last few hours.” you laughed, your tummy rumbling as a response to your words, making Tae laugh. 

“Then let’s go!” he speaks, before running with your arm still in his towards the dining hall. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * 

After every luncheon that you attended over the next three days, Taehyung met you after, taking you on tours of the palace, showing you places you couldn’t wait to see more of in detail. Your days quickly becoming filled with laughter and happiness, making you never want to go back to your home again. 

The Queen Dowager had noticed your quick friendship between the two of you, and had smiled, knowing that if you were chosen, you would fit right in. 

- * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * - * 

Today was the day when the ladies would begin receiving gifts. The ladies were gathered in the small courtyard that they had been in during the first stage. Large screens between each set of cushions. On the small stage, sat two seats, one more elegant than the other. 

Standing in front of your cushions, you waited for whoever was to occupy the seats to sit in them. And while you were stuck in your thoughts, a man who you had not seen since the first stage entered, sitting in the less elegant seat on the right hand side of the stage. You bow deeply to him, before standing upright again. Seconds later the Queen Dowager was announced, and she also entered the stage, sitting on the more regal looking chair. Again you bow deeply, waiting for the confirmation that you could rest on the cushions behind you. She nods, and you let out a smile, plopping down onto the cushions.

taglist

@zae007live

Taehyung's gift

words: 583

Taehyung 

Taehyung wasn’t sure what to give to the ladies, so he went with something that he loved… jewellery. 

So he made sure to get the right gifts for the right people. 

As he was one of the people who had spent the most time with you, he knew the type of thing you would like, and he knew that he wanted you to go through to the next stage after the interview. 

He wanted to keep you in his life. 

He knew that when you wore large pieces of jewellery, you paired them with other simple pieces of jewellery. So he knew what to get you immediately after yoongi’s and jimin’s gift. 

He had been one of the first people to hear you talk about your best friend, and as he wanted you to be the chosen person, he knew to get Yeji something sweet as well. 

He couldn’t stand Seol-Hyun and Eun-Bi, but he knew that the eunuchs liked them, so he got them some “nice” gifts to appease them. 

“Welcome ladies,” the tall man said, smiling briefly in your direction. You and Taehyung had spent a lot of time together recently, him meeting you after your luncheons with the Queen Dowager and her ladies. You would both agree that you had become fast friends. “I sincerely hope that you appreciate your gift as much as we all have appreciated your presence in the palace” the man lied through his teeth, knowing that Seol-Hyun and Eun-Bi had been rude and aggressive towards their staff. 

He, like the men before him, made his way down the stairs and to the guard with the trolley. Picking up the first four gifts which held a pair of beoseon’s in their family colours and their family seal, handed it to the first four women with a small but genuine smile. Then came Yeji’s turn, who he handed a small square box, which inside held a small bracelet with a butterfly chain attached to it, a large and genuine smile on his face. With his next few steps, he was in front of the two women who he disliked and handed them a small golden band for them to wear around their wrists. The bracelets had no details, just simple gold bands. He handed them to the women, with a grimace that could be mistaken for a smile if you didn’t know better. 

Taehyung practically bounces toward you, his smile bigger than the ones he had worn for the women before you. He hands you a tiny square box, crouching down to see you open it. 

“Lady Seo” he had said as he passed you your gift “do you have another luncheon today?” he asked. You nod, before opening your gift, inside was a signet ring, with the royal seal engraved into it. You gasped in happiness, immediately slipping it onto your finger, looking back up at Taehyung. He smiles at you before speaking again “I take it that you like your gift Lady Seo” he jokes, your obvious appreciation for the gift being the smile on your face as you twirled the ring around your finger in happiness. “I do indeed Master Kim,” you told him, using the same formalities that he was using with you. “I'm glad, I shall meet you once again after the luncheon, okay?” he told you rather than asking you.  “Today, I'm going to show you the library”. Excitement fills you at the thought of the rest of your day. 

Chapter 5 - Part 3- Royal Residences

Warnings: female identifying character, brief mentions of nudity, bullying, a heck load of fluff and clothing envy (at least for me)

Word Count: 3.8k

It was knowing that the banquet was in two days that filled you with nerves and excitement. Knowing that you were in the final three, filled you with dread and joy. On one hand, you had come to make friends with plenty of the people in the palace and not being able to see them again as easily as you had been, made your heart hurt. But on the other hand, if you weren’t chosen, you would become a concubine and would never be able to find the love that you deserved as you would be branded the king’s woman. Another thing that you knew, if you were to become a concubine, was that the women who had caused you so much annoyance and hurt in your life, would be the queen, and they would get rid of you, right to the lowest position, and you would be stuck at the bottom of the pile for the rest of your life. This scared you more than you thought it did, and as the thoughts came to your head, so did the realisation of where you were. So, you tried to distract yourself, thinking about all of the good times that you had, especially that day. You had finally met the king! 

The thought of the king brought a gentle smile to your face, a blush blanketing your already rosy cheeks. You couldn’t help but look at the bookshelf that had been placed in your apartment before you even got home. Some of your other gifts lay around it, such as your hanbok and accessories, and even some of the gifts that the Queen Dowager had gifted you during your days together. 

 *a few days before * 

Today, you were meeting with the Queen Dowager and her ladies again for a meeting. These events had quickly become something that you deeply enjoyed and looked forward to. You received a note from her this morning, letting you know that she wanted to have a separate meeting with you after the meeting, and letting you know that she wanted to have the luncheon with just you. To which you of course obliged, sending a quick letter back, alerting the Queen Dowager that you were excited and would meet her later. 

The meeting ended quicker than you had expected and before you knew it, you were back in the cherry blossom garden, in the palladium that overlooked the small lake that sat in the middle, sat across from the Queen Dowager. You had decided today that there was no better day than to wear the hanbok that she had gifted to you, allowing the both of you to reminisce on the memories of the past two weeks. You had spent plenty of time together whether it be luncheons or part of the process. You could even say that you were closer with the Queen Dowager than you were with your family members. 

“I have another gift for you, chin-aehaneun. I hope that you love it as much as I loved it. It was the wedding outfit I wore when I married Namjoon’s father.” The older woman speaks, beckoning a number of servants towards the two of you, each holding a box and placing it at your feet. Before thinking about your actions, you leapt up and moved towards the woman, throwing your arms around her. 

“eomeoni gamsahabnida, I can’t thank you enough for this, but surely it should go to the future queen?” you spoke, still hugging the woman as she hugged you back. However, at the end of the sentence she pulled back and looked at you before speaking “ttal, you have passed the interviews, and I know that you are a favourite of all of the boys, I have a feeling that you will be wearing that hanbok, should you choose to, within a few months” you couldn’t help but let the tears fill up in your eyes, never having felt as loved and welcomed as you had been the last two weeks. 

Memories of the past two weeks began to come to you one by one, each bringing a smile to your face. Remembering meeting each of the boys, from the youngest to the oldest. It didn’t matter what situation you had met them in, every time you met them, happiness overpowered wherever you were. You remembered walking through the gardens with your best friend Yeji, and wandering the library with the cat-like Yoongi. Nearly every moment that you had spent in the royal grounds was a happy one, and to think of leaving it, leaving those people, made you feel sick to your stomach. 

A knock at the door to your chambers brought you out of your memories. You quickly shook your head and stood, racing to your front door, wondering who could possibly be at your door. It wasn’t like it was late or anything, you just weren’t expecting anyone till later on, when you were expecting your best friend Yeji to arrive to sleep over. Opening up the door, you saw one of the servants that followed Kim Namjoon around, tending to his requests. He stood there in a monochrome white outfit, each piece of white clothing being a different white to the rest. In his hands, he held a large black box with gold dragon details engraved and painted onto the sides. The man was red in the face and it was a stark contrast to his outfit, the colour only returning to his face once he had placed the box down just inside the door to your chamber. “This is a gift from the King and his closest companions, they request that you wear it to the banquet in 2 days time” he tells you before bowing and retreating. You call out to Chan and Changbin hoping that one of them would be in your chamber, resting in their rooms, and to your luck, both men were in. All it took was a smile and a point to the box for them to understand what you were asking of them. 

Once the box was in your room, you eagerly opened the lid, not expecting what was inside the box. It had to be the most beautiful piece of clothing that you had ever seen, even more beautiful than the previous hanbok that you had been gifted. At the top of the box there was a crimson red jeogori, the goreum being an almost shiny golden material with dragons embroidered into the ribbon. The jeogori itself had threads of gold stitched into it, so that when the light shined onto it the right way, it was an even more stunning sight to behold.  Pulling out the jeogori out of the box, you place it carefully to the side on a spare cushion and move onto the chima, which was equally as stunning. The majority of the chima was the same gorgeous red, with gold stitched into the fabric. However, at the very bottom of the chima, there was a gold band that went all the way around and went down until the hem. On this strip of gold, there were the same dragons embroidered as part of the goreum. Tears began to well up your eyes, as you pulled the chima out of the box and noticed that there were even more items inside the box. This was the most beautiful thing you had ever received and yet the things coming out of the box seemed to be getting more and more beautiful. 

Next out of the box was a smaller box, pulling the lid off of that, there was a pair of red gomusin, with dragons painted onto the toe area of the shoes in black and gold. Tucked neatly beside them was a pair of red beoseons, a small dragon embroidered in a golden thread on the inside of each sock. Peeking into the box once again, you noticed 3 more boxes. You decided to go for the next biggest box. Repeating the same move of opening the lid and peering in. Inside this box was a jewellery set, which included earrings, rings, necklace and even a set of cheopji. The pair of cheopji each had a dragon made of gold with red gems placed where the eyes should be. The necklace was a dainty chain with a dragon head pendant hanging from it. The earrings matched the hair pins, two dragon heads, although smaller, with red gems where the eyes should be. And as you placed the ring on your pointer finger you realised that it looked like the dragon was wrapping itself around your finger, and a small giggle left your mouth. You placed all of the items into the box and moved onto the next box. 

The third box that you picked up was again, smaller than the last. Inside this one, held a small bracelet. This box however held a note inside. The note read: 

“Eolin-I, I can’t wait to welcome you into our family, wear this hanbok with pride, you deserve it. Eomma” 

The note made the tears that were gathering in your eyes, finally fall. Even the Queen Dowager had added something into the box of beautiful gifts. Your heart felt full with happiness. 

Inside the last and final box there was a norigae and another note. This note read “Chin-aehaneun, we hope that you adore our gift as much as we adore you. We all look forward to you wearing it. Sincerely, King Kim Namjoon and boys”. 

Moving the note to the side, you stared at the exquisite piece of fabrics before you, that had been crafted to form a norigae. The main ornament was a gorgeous red jasper crystal shaped into a dragon head. But there were two smaller ornaments hanging underneath it, made of a crystal like stone, engraved into butterfly shapes. This made you smile, reminding you of the conversations you had with the boys about your best friend, and her nickname. The knot that both attached to the goreum and held the ornaments was the same red and gold fabric that the hanbok was made out of. The knots that held the ornaments were rather small, but they only made to make the beauty of the ornaments stand out. And finally, the tassels that hang underneath the butterfly ornaments, were the same gold and red fabrics that were used. Everything in the box was stunning, and you couldn’t believe that you were lucky enough to be able to wear something as stunning as what was before you. 

Your heart filled with joy as your eyes fell with tears that once again fell with happiness, as you held the hanbok close to you. 

— * — * — *— * — * — *— * — * — * fast forward — * — * — *— * — * — *— * — * — *

Today was the day of the banquet. You had barely slept during the night, being filled with both nervousness and excitement. The last few days, you had been spending time with Yeji, the Queen Dowager, and secretly with the King himself, hidden away in the shelves of the library. The banquet was to begin in the early evening, and the three remaining ladies were to arrive after the King and his men. Each one would be announced one by one, and once all the ladies were in the room, the ladies would be told to come forward in turn. And finally, music would begin playing and the King would step forward and that is how the kingdom would announce who would be the new Queen. The process had been drilled into you by the Queen Dowager, who would also drop hints that it would be you. She wouldn’t let you make a single mistake, as she already saw you as her daughter, and she adored you, and despised the other two contenders. 

Within 10 minutes of being awake, one of your ladies had knocked on your door to the bedroom. With your consent, she opens the door, bows deeply towards you, and announces that she has prepared a bath for you. You smile at the woman, getting out of your pool of comfort and follow her towards the bathroom. 

The bathroom was much more different to the one you had at home. The bathroom at home was almost cold, with dark colours, and stone details. But the bathroom in this chamber was full of light and colours. The bath was built into the ground and had an outer barrier of stones around it other than where the steps into the bath were. Inside the bath, the water was almost white, and you guessed that they had probably added some milk to make the water even better for your skin. Once you got to the edge of the bath, Hwasa turned around allowing you some privacy to unrobe and get into the bath. Once you were in the bath, you noticed that there were rose petals floating around the water. You kept your hair up at Hwasa’s request, and found a ledge in the bath to sit on, and let your body sink into the water until it reached your shoulders. You let out a gentle sigh, notifying Hwasa that she could turn back around. Once she did, she made her way to the door, bowing once more before leaving. 

You sat in the bath for around 30 minutes, allowing the water to cool and calm your nerves. The realisation that your calming bath was over, was Hwasa re-entering the room along with Hyo-Seong. One handed you a robe, and the other placed a towel at the edge of the bath so that you could dry your feet once you stepped out of the bath and reduce the risk of slipping over. You pulled the robe shut around you and followed them out of the room and into the main room, where your hanbok was placed onto a wooden figure, the accessories being placed on the dressing table, and the shoes being placed next to the clothing. Makeup and other styling accessories were also placed on the dressing table, such as combs and gels to keep your hair together. You were placed into some underwear and then the robe was wrapped back around you, before you were placed into the chair. Hwasa began to comb your hair, trying not to hurt you when detangling any knots you had in your hair, whilst Hyo-Seong sat next to you, using a dye similar to the colour of your hanbok to dye your nails to match them. Once Hwasa had finished detangling and Hyo-Seong had finished one hand, they moved onto another job. Hwasa moved on to braiding your hair with multiple different braids of different types. And Hyo-Seong moved to your other hand, continuing her job. Hyo-Seong finished her job first, and moved to stand up, helping Hwasa with your hair. Once your hair was braided, with multiple intricate braids across your head, the cheopji were placed on either side of your head, piercing through one of the braids in your hair that was formed in the shape of a bun. Both ladies take a step back and admire their work with large grins on their faces, making brief eye contact with you in the mirror that was placed above the dressing table. 

Next the ladies moved onto the makeup. They used a plant ash that was used with a delicate brush to create eyeliner, defining your eyes. A slightly inky like powder that looked clumpy yet watery, was used along with a spikey looking brush, was combed along your eyelashes, elongating them, and defining them with the dark black colour. Next they used a fluffy brush along with a yeonji powder, and brushed it lightly across your cheeks, allowing them to look naturally healthy and rosey. Then they added a small amount of water and picked up another brush, swiping it across your lips, darkening them to become almost the same colour as your hanbok.

Once all the makeup was completed, they began placing the majority of your jewellery. Placing in the earrings and doing the necklace up at the back of your neck. Then they turned you around, placing the socks onto your previously cold feet. Once the socks were on they pulled you up from the seat and moved you towards the wooden figure. They took the chima off of the figure and placed it on the ground before you stepped into it. Once you had stepped into it, they pulled it up to your bust. It took you a few moments to realise that it was a dress-like chima, and you needed to put your arms through the straps. There was a slight ribbon detail at the back of the dress that allowed them to tighten the chima to fit you perfectly. Then the jeogori was placed onto your body, the sleeves reaching your wrists, and the length covering the top part of your chima. Hyo-Seong then tied up the goreum, before placing the norigae onto the ribbon of the goreum. Hwasa follows this action by placing the remaining jewellery onto your body. Finally, the shoes were placed in front of you, as both ladies took a hold of your hands allowing you to hold onto them as you balanced on one foot to put the other into the shoe. 

By this time, it was almost time to make your way to where the banquet was being held. The walk to this building would be a short 5 minute walk. So you took the moment of peace that you had to rest and admire your outfit, everything from your clothing to your jewellery to your nails to your makeup. Before you knew it, it was time for you to leave. You opened up the door to your chambers and made your way out of it, Yeji waiting for you outside of the door, dressed in a beautiful peach colour, with butterfly shaped accessories. 

“OMO!” Yeji practically screams at you.”You look like the future queen eolin-i. You look so yeppeoyo! Everyone is going to have their eyes on you all night! Gajah!”

You can't help but smile and blush at your best friend's words, as you link arms with her. The walk to the room felt like it passed in a few brief seconds with the constant chatting between you and your best friend, rather than the five minutes it took to get there. Once you arrived you noticed Eun-bi and Seol-Hyun also waiting outside of the entrance, dressed in purples and pinks. Yeji squeezed your arm before bowing ever so slightly towards the women and entering the hall. A guard dressed in all black began towards your group announcing that the king and his men were on the way and that it was tradition that the women would hide until they had entered so that they couldn't see them. With a nod, you all moved to hide behind a wall away from any peeking eyes. Once the three of you had hidden out of sight, Eun-Bi turned to you with a sneer on her face “Why on earth would you wear the royal wedding colour, and with dragon details, who do you think you are? Don’t you think you’re a bit full of yourself for someone who looks the way that you do?” Seol-Hyun laughed at the comment before adding “It’s almost like you're asking for everyone to laugh at you”. Before you had the chance to respond, the same guard who had asked you to hide appeared again, alerting you that you could now enter the room, and the order that you would be going into the room. To Seol-Hyun’s joy, she was first, followed by Eun-Bi and then you. Seol-Hyun moved towards the large doors, and waited for them to be opened. You couldn’t see what was in the room, but you could hear the claps and music as the first lady was welcomed into the room. The doors were kept open as Eun-Bi moved toward the door, and entered. The noise of music and clapping continued. 

With a breath, you took a step towards the door,  it was your time to enter the room. You kept your head high and level, and stepped into the room. You walked as elegantly as you could towards the front of the room where the other ladies were waiting. On your way to the front, you made eye contact with Yeji, sending her a small grin before moving your eyesight towards the front, before accidentally making eye contact with the Queen Dowager, who gave you a loving smile and a wink that you would have missed if you blinked. Before you knew it, you were at the front of the room, standing next to Eun-Bi, in front of the king. 

The King looked even more handsome than he did in his last ceremonial robes that he wore when handing out his gifts just two days ago. Namjoon stood up and smiled at the crowd, the crowd growing silent within moments, eagerly waiting for his announcement. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for attending the announcement banquet. Today I will be announcing my future bride, your future queen, in front of you all. I hope you all love her as much as I have begun to. Now for the announcement”. He took a few steps forward until he stood in front of the three of you. He first stood in front of Seol-Hyun. The crowd remained silent. Namjoon spoke again “Thank you for being a part of this process but you will not continue through to the next stage. Please step off to the side, someone will be along soon to talk to you about what will happen next.” He told her, before moving to Eun-Bi, who turned briefly to you, smirking at you as if to say haha I win. After this look, Namjoon also made brief eye contact with you, sending an almost hidden smile your way. “Eun-Bi, thank you. However, you also won’t be entering the next level, please join your friend to the side, someone will also be along to speak to you”. The look on her face nearly made you laugh out loud, but you held it in. Eun-Bi begrudgingly moved to the side, joining the crowd and standing next to her friend. Namjoon then moves to stand in front of you. He cautiously takes your hands in his larger ones, looks you in the eyes before looking around at the crowd. He straightens his back, and smiles before speaking “This is Lady Seo Y/N. Over the past two weeks, myself, my closest friends and even my familys have gotten to know this beautiful young woman before us. I have fallen a little more in love each day, and I would be honoured if Lady Seo would accept my request to become both the Queen and the Royal Bride”.

“Yes, My King, I accept”

taglist

series

@skyss-universse @yongiigolden @zae007live @thedarkwinterrose @namjinieesope @uniquelyabnormallyoriginal @poesreddeath @insert-a-creative-url-here @hey-syia @scientisterror @emu007 @hajimaoppaa @feedthefandoms995 @maetyun @explorewithd @treetops68 @bibebts @angel-121 @sbromp @zmbo97 @sngssy @silverrr-spooon @el-insomnio-no-es-divertido @plutoneu @oppa-agust-d-d [proof reader] @jolinaprincessrincess @iamhereforbts

permanent

@ewok7attack @marc-ella

A New Chapter?

Hey guys, now that I finally have my laptop and my life is slowly getting back on track, would you guys like another chapter? And if so, what do you guys want from the chapter?

Chapter 6- The Royal Announcement

Warnings: female presenting character, mentions of abuse from a parental figure, mentions of bullying, mentions of the death of a side character, yoongi being adorable, namjoon being protective, namjoons eomma being protective, low self esteem, crying, mentions of a dog

Word Total: 4.2k

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

Claps soon emanate from the room at the acceptance of the king’s proposal of marriage. Briefly glancing just past the shoulder of the king, you saw your two other contenders, standing there practically green with envy. Their faces contorted with anger at the realisation that they would never be queen. You had the power. But you didn’t care about the power, it was the love of the boys both in front of you and behind you. The boys who you had become so close to, that you felt if you were away from them for too long your heart may break. 

Namjoon turns back around, and his eyes fall onto the crowd before him. Rustling is heard as people fall to their knees to bow to their king and now… their future queen. Eun-Bi and Seol-Hyun begrudgingly follow the audience's lead. Once everyone had risen again, Namjoon addressed the audience once more. 

“Tonight we shall celebrate my bride. The wedding will take place in 50 days. I would like to invite my beautiful future queen's family forward. However, first I would like to introduce the two candidates who did not make it. Tradition states that you are now Kings women” he began, turning to face the women who now held mischievous smirks on their faces. Namjoon squeezed the hand he was still holding before continuing on “However, that will not be what is happening this time. The woman whom I will marry will be the only one for me” he carried on, turning back to the crowd fully “As you all may know, I have never had a… collection…” he grimaced “of concubines. And I will not be starting now. I invite you all to enjoy the celebrations. And I especially look forward to meeting my bride’s family” he finished. A sudden pang hit your chest when you realised Namjoon was meeting your father. You had spoken with the Queen Dowager about what your relationship with your father was like, and you didn’t know if she had mentioned it to the boys, but knowing her, she would have. 

Putting on a brave face, you smiled whilst your family made their way up to the two of you. Your mother was the first to greet the two of you, a look of pride and a smile as wide as her face greeted you. 

“Chin-aehaneun, I am so proud of you. I have missed you so much” she spoke, placing her hands against your cheeks, love radiating from her eyes. Pulling you into a hug, you allow yourself to take a breath of her scent. The scent reminded you of home. Of love. Of warmth. Of her. She was wearing her best hanbok for this occasion. The jeogri was a beautiful crimson colour, the chima matching the colour perfectly. Your family emblem is sewn into the bottom of the skirt as yours had. The goreum was in a beautiful white, a contrast to the dark colour of the other fabric just beneath it. After a brief hug, your mother took a step back, before falling onto her knees in front of the king. 

“My deepest apologies, your royal highness, for I did not greet you first, as I should have. It has been so long since I have been able to hold my daughter that I forgot my place. Please forgive me, my King”. Namjoon laughed joyfully, crouching down to pull your mother from the floor, a smile so handsome that you felt your heart miss a beat and a smile crawl onto your lips. 

“Eomeoni, you need not thank me. I would have done the same in your position. Thank you for giving birth to such a woman, my family and I love her.” he said pulling her to stand. “I would like to formally invite you to dine with the Kim family, where you will dine alongside myself, my eomma and my closest men. Please join us in the dining hall in around 10 minutes from now?” he said, his hand closed around your mothers as he talked. After receiving a nod of confirmation from your mother, he lets go of her hands and takes a step back. The handsome smile falls from his face, as he moves his hands behind his back. The briefly gentle-looking man, now looking every part of King Namjoon. He turns to your father, his face stern and solid, his teeth grit together. Your father, pretending to play the part of a loving father, takes a step towards you. However, it is not Namjoon that stops the man from taking a step closer to you. Its Yoongi. Both yours and your father's faces change to one of shock. Your father goes almost red in anger before he remembers where he is and takes a step back once more. 

“My apologies Sir, I didn’t realise I couldn’t greet my own daughter” he spoke to Yoongi, disdain evident in his voice. Yoongi smirked at the audacity of the man before him. Yoongi remembered everything you had told him of your father from the times you had spent together since arriving here, he had also been told by the Queen Dowager, when she warned everyone of the turbulent relationship between the two of you before the ceremony. 

*5 days previous*

The boys had decided that today was Yoongi’s day to spend with you. He had been the busiest and had the least amount of time to spend with you, and as it was his free day, they deemed it only fair that it was his day. You had received a letter in the early morning to meet him in the cherry blossom gardens, on the dock by the lake. One of his men would be there to escort you, just in case you got lost. You found out recently when trying to find a wishing well that Jungkook had told you about in the east corner of the grounds, how easy it really was to get lost in a place such as this, so you were thankful that someone would be able to escort you to the exact right place. 

Dressing in the hanbok that Jimin gifted you, you revelled in the beauty of it. Watching how the sun hit the purple shades beautifully, and how it caught the glimmer of the golden thread that was sewn into the dress in butterfly shapes. Making sure to attach the norigae to the outfit, your heart filled with happiness and love at the thoughts of the time you had spent here so far. Sitting down you pull on the lilac beoseons and then place the purple gomusin’s. Finally, you turn and shuffle over to where your mirror sat, and where your ladies were waiting for you. On the table by the mirror were the golden cheopji’s that you had been gifted alongside the outfit you were currently wearing, as well as the earrings that Yoongi had gifted you. Your heart fluttered as you remembered what he had said when gifting them to you. No one other than your mother had made you feel as loved and as beautiful as the 6 men you met with regularly and the Queen Dowager. You had yet to meet the king for the final part but the men of his that you had met gave you hope that they would be as kind as them. Alongside the earrings from Yoongi, was the ring that Taehyung had gifted you. Luna, the puppy that Jungkook had gifted you, sat next to you, her head resting on your leg as Hwasa began styling your hair, braiding it but allowing some hair to fall in strands around your face. She places the cheopji’s in carefully, before moving on to her next job. Applying a gentle rouge to your lips, making them a gorgeous pink colour. Soft and inviting, you hoped. Whilst Hwasa was attending to your hair and makeup, Hyo-Seong got to work placing the jewellery onto your body. First, she placed the earrings in your ears, making sure not to let any of the loose hair knot into the earrings. Then, she placed the signet ring on your little finger on your right hand, the finger closest to your ring finger, making you smile down at it. Once they had both completed their respective jobs, they took a step back and smiled at their work. Hyo-Seong took a step to the side, retrieving a collar and a rope-like item. The rope had a handle fashioned onto it, and any loose hairs on the rope had disappeared. It was able to be tied onto the collar. Hwasa called Luna over to her, who upon hearing her name bounded over to the lady. Placing the collar carefully around the neck of the dog, she then attached the lead, before handing the part with the handle to you. You stood up, smiled at your dog and the ladies and made your way towards the door. 

Pulling open the door, you saw a man with his fist raised. The man jumped and took a few steps back. 

“Lady Seo, I am here to bring you to the Head Directorate, His Lordship Min Yoongi, please accompany me this way,” he says, bowing slightly and moving his arm to gesture the way towards the cherry blossom gardens. Bowing slightly back, you turn and smile towards your ladies before moving out of your apartment and following after the young man just ahead of you. Moments later, you arrive in front of the man who you had previously been told about. Min Yoongi, in the flesh. He stood by a large piece of fabric on the ground. Pillows are strategically placed, allowing for comfort as well as for being able to see each other comfortably. A small wooden table sat near the end of the pier. It held so many of your favourite foods, that you have discussed with the Queen Dowager or one of the other boys. Everything from your favourite snack to your favourite dessert was on the table. Another table just to the left of it, held different drinks, also, more of your favourites. Luna didn’t care to notice your admiration and tugged on the rope to get to Yoongi, wanting belly rubs from the man. Yoongi noticing the pull on the lead gave you a swift nod, and you let go of the lead, allowing her to run to the man, desperate for his attention. You smile at the sight of the usually stoic man, smiling a gummy smile down at the small dog. Your heart felt so full at that very moment. Seconds later, Luna got bored with the tummy rubs and went and laid on one of the cushions, lying directly on her back, paws in the air, soaking in the sun as if she was a human trying to soak up the sun into their bones. Yoongi lets out a short laugh, directing his gummy smile towards you, before holding his hand out…

“Shall we, Lady Seo?” he asks. You smile back at the man, taking his hand and allowing him to lead the way over to the cushions. 

“I may have had to ask the boys and eommoni what your favourite food and drinks are,” he said nervously, taking a jug of liquid and pouring it into two separate cups. Handing one to you and then taking his. You both smile at each other and take a small sip of the liquid. A content smile leaves your lips once you have swallowed the sweet liquid. It was peach tea, much like the tea that is served at the Queen Dowager’s luncheons. Served in your favourite way, cold and sweet. You take another happy sip, before placing the cup down and turning to look at the man before you. 

“You did not need to do all of this for me, my lord,” you told him before continuing “I deeply appreciate and love this, but it is not I that deserves this”. The words that come out of your mouth quickly make the man before you snap his head to you in shock. 

“Why is it that you have decided that you do not deserve this? What or who has made you believe that you are not worthy of all the love and attention that you receive? Tell me who and I shall have their heads immediately” the blonde-haired man speaks to you, his voice serious and his eyes full of questions and… worry? Why is the man before you worried? It could not be that he has feelings for you, you tell yourself. Bowing your head slightly, you try to put into words the thoughts that are swirling around in your head. 

“I do not know how much the Queen Dowager has told you about myself. So please allow me to tell you myself.” you began “When I was growing up, I briefly attend schooling, mainly on elegance, reading and other such subjects. Whilst attending this school, I met Yeji, my best friend, and my school bullies, who are also here, Kim Seol-Hyun and Kwon Eun-Bi. They made my life in and around that school a living nightmare, they would constantly taunt my weight and…. The…. my….. My sister died when I was younger, it couldn’t be helped, we did everything we could, tried every doctor, and every medicine. Nothing worked, and she passed away in my arms. The two girls somehow knew of this and told me every day that it was my fault, that the reason she passed was due to me, and that she never got any food, but that wasn’t true. I barely ate when my unnie was ill, I was always the one looking after her. And that’s when my father started drinking, using the money on beer instead of looking after his family. I tried so hard to keep my family together, but I just couldn’t do it. And those two… beasts made everything worse, to the point where I engrained into my brain that I was undeserving of love, because surely if three people tell you that you are unworthy of love that must be true right?” you spoke. You jumped when you felt a soft thumb touch your cheek, wiping away the tears you didn’t know that you had spilt. 

“You are worth so much more than their meaningless words, you are worthy of so much love and you deserve so much love. They do not even deserve to be in your presence. You are an angel that has been sent down to show us what we have been missing and what we need in our lives. You don’t have to tell me any more if your heart does not desire to do so” He spoke, his eyes never leaving yours, as he continued to wipe more tears away from your rosy cheeks. 

“Things between my father and I got a lot worse when unnie died. He drank more, and he treated me worse. He would come home from drinking and say ‘im using this money for your future’, he would tell me that his drinking was all my fault. That it should have been me who died. The night that Lord Kim Seokjin announced that the King was looking for a Queen in our village was the night that my father attacked me for the first time. When I came home with the news that the Supreme Commissioner had visited and told us the news, he told me that I would not be proceeding with the application. I tried to be brave” you continued on. Yoongi took a hold of both your hands, enveloping his large ones with yours. He squeezed them and you gave him a gentle smile before continuing on. “ I told him that he has no authority in this decision, that the law dictated that we must, or our family would be shamed. My mother was so happy to be able to do this for me. She told me to go and get myself ready for the dinner that we would be having with the Hwangs. And so I did, I went to my room to get myself ready and I had taken some of my braids out when my father stormed into the room. I had never seen him so angry before. I felt trapped… and…. And… scared” you spoke. Tears began falling down your face at a more rapid pace. Yoongi could see your eyes beginning to fill with fear as the story continued on. “He stormed in and told me that I was treating him as a child as if I was his parent. I was sitting down, so I thought standing up might make me safer, but he obviously thought differently. He lunged towards me, and he grabbed some of the braids that were still tied and yanked me to the floor with them. I remember hitting my head and then him screaming at me” you stated. Yoongi continued to watch as your eyes became more and more distant as if you weren’t really there with him. Almost like you had been transported into your memory. He moved to sit next to you, holding you in his arms. Allowing you to feel safe when you’re body was feeling terrified. “Even when I was on the ground he screamed ‘I am the man of this house’ and ‘I make the rules’. One of the things that hurt more than what he did was his screaming in my face ‘not a’” you hiccuped “ ‘a fat little girl who won’t even make it past the first stage’ and then he crouched down to my height, and told me that it should have been me that died, and I should never have been born and that I was a disgrace.” You finished, looking up into Yoongi’s brown eyes. Your eyes became more focused and then a light smile hit your lips “that's when my eomma came in. She grabbed him by his ear and dragged him out by it. I had never seen so much fire and anger in that women’s eyes ever before. It was truly a sight to behold. Once she had pulled him out of the house, she came back in and told me that I was none of those things that the man had told me and she held me as I curled up into her arms, My eomma has always been my biggest supporter.” you finished. Yoongi looked at you, and he didn’t look at you with shame or embarrassment, there was a look in his eyes that almost reminded you of love. He held you in his arms for a few moments longer before speaking to you again “your eomma is right, you are none of those things that the disgrace of man who calls himself your father called you. You are so much more. I have only known you for a short while but I know that I cannot let you leave my life. My life is so much better now that you are a part of it. And if I have anything to do with it, Namjoon… I mean the king, will make you his wife, and I… I mean we… I mean he, will be able to dote on you for the rest of your life. You are worth so much more than what he says, and if I ever have the displeasure of meeting him, know that I will have a few choice words to say to him” He tells you, his face stern, his eyes looking off into the horizon, making you giggle at his almost heroic position. 

“Thank you, Lord Min,” you told him.

“Call me Yoongi” he responded

“Thank you, Yoongi” you repeated. “I do have a question for you, however,” you continued 

“Question away nae salang/Sarang,” he told you, making you blush at him calling you ‘his love’.

“What is the relationship between you, the Great King and his other men? You need not tell me if it makes you uncomfortable my lord” you questioned. “Sorry I mean Yoongi”

The man laughs at your minor slip-up, making you feel at ease. He turned his body slightly more towards you. 

“The king, his men and I, well…” he paused, taking a deep breath before continuing “we are together. Romantically that is. But I personally have felt that we weren’t quite complete like there was something or someone missing. And I can’t speak for the other boys, well I can a little bit due to the discussions we’ve had. But when we saw you, it was like everything in the world became brighter, the colours more radiant, the breeze that much sweeter. Like you were destined to be ours. And so we told Namjoon, who will be choosing the final woman to be the bride, and we all concluded that you were the woman we wanted. So if you’ll have us, we want you. We all want you” he finished, looking you directly in the eyes, fear and nervousness swirling around in his eyes, as he waited with bated breath for your rejection or acceptance of his admission. 

“I want nothing more than to be yours, all of yours,” you told the man before you, bringing your hand up to rest against his cheek. His eyes lit up with joy as he stood up, pulled you up, and lifted you into his arms, spinning you around

“You need not apologise Sir Seo, but it is your King who you should address first, not your daughter. Or do you not have any respect for your King or even your future son-in-law” Yoongi spoke. His back was straight, his ceremonial robes fitting to perfection around every crease of his body, and his right hand resting gracefully on the katana that dangled from his left-hand side. The man before him looked flabbergasted. Namjoon let out a quiet snicker beside you that he easily covered as a cough if you did not know any better. 

“Who do you think you are, telling me who I shall and shan’t greet? The Great King was accepting of my wife greeting our beloved daughter before him, so I shall do the same” Your father spoke, digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole. Before Yoongi had a chance to respond to the ill-mannered man before him, the Queen Dowager stood, moving to stand between your father and the men who stood on either side of you. 

“The man who you are talking to” the Queen Dowager started “is the Head Directorate, a man way beyond your station. It is required of you to speak to him with respect. Or you see that katana that he holds so elegantly?” She spoke, moving her hand and body to gesture to the large blade that Yoongi held, her head turning just slightly more than her body to send a wink to the three of you. Once she has gestured, she moves her body back towards the man who fidgets in his spot, taking a step closer towards him, her face stiffening with hidden anger. She lowers her voice so that only those nearby can hear “I will personally assure you that he uses that ever so sharp blade to cut your head clean from your neck. If you ever think about disrespecting my family. Ever. again. Is that understood?”. The man before her swallowed in fear before nodding and bowing deeply towards the revered woman. 

He moves and stands in front of the king. He too falls to his knees and bows multiple times before him. Waiting for the command to stand to fall from the gracious king’s lips. He bows 5 more times before the words slip from between the plump lips of the king. 

“You may stand,” he tells him, his voice deep with authority. “However,” he continues on “as you so like to drink, you shall be sent to the bar. For good. You will never see your family again, you have lost your title, and if you think of ever causing any trouble, my mother will see that her threat becomes reality. Do you understand me?”. Your father stands there, his mouth falling open and closed as if he were a fish. After a few moments without a response, he sighs deeply before repeating. “I said. Do. I. Make. Myself. Clear?” enunciating his every word. Your father, still not responding, stands there. It is only when Namjoon calls for the guards that he begins to realise the depths of his situation and tries to scramble his way out of it. He falls to the ground again and bows as deeply as possible, begging the tall man before him for his forgiveness. But Namjoon does not budge a single inch, glaring down at the man with the most amount of distaste you had ever seen in anyone's eyes. 

When your father has finally been removed from the room. Namjoon turns to your mother. 

“Eommani, I sincerely and deeply apologise for having to do that within your presence. It would be my greatest honour to house you within my kingdom. Would you do me that honour?” He asks the woman who is a striking resemblance to you. 

“It would be my honour, your highness she says” bowing as low as she can once more. Namjoon pulls her up before she can reach the floor before telling her “you need not bow towards me eommani, it is I who should bow to you.” He states, going to bow himself. Your mother stops him before he can even bow his back more than 45 degrees. She holds his hands in hers and speaks…

“Please call me eomma”

SERIES TAGLIST

@skyys-universe @yoongiigolden @zae007live @thedarkwinterrose

@namjinieesope @uniquelyabnormallyoriginal @poesreddeath @insert-a-creative-url-right-here @hey-syia @scentisterror @emu007 @hajimaoppaa @feedthefandoms995 @maetyun @explorewithd @treetops68 @bibebts @angel-121 @sbromp @zmbo97 @sgnsgssy @silverrr-spooon @el-insomnio-no-es-divertido @plutoneu @oppa-agust-d @jolinaprincess @iamhereforbts @wiccanmetallicrose @iwishididn0texist @hair1997 @uniquecutieprincess @agusfree @borahaetelevision @queen-in-the-shadows

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@ewok7attack @marcelka134340

PROOF READERS

@marcelka134340 @oppa-agust-d

Chapter 7- The Move

Authors note- I am so sorry it has been taking me so long to write, every time I sat down to write, I just had writer's block and nothing was working. However, I am on holiday in France right now, and the sun is shining, the birds are chirping and I finally found inspiration. This isn't a long chapter but I hope you all enjoy it.

total word count: 2.4k

warnings:

warnings: mentions of weight, AFAB character, mentions of female body parts, references to the weight of M/C, loosely based on my own research of the ancient Korean royalty system, bullying, loneliness, anxiety, money problems, mentions of how other people view characters body

message me if you feel I need more warnings or if you would like to be a proofreader!

As soon as the words came out of your mother's mouth, the smile on Namjoons face changed from one of nervousness to one of genuine happiness. Taking a step back from your family, Namjoon moves to talk to the audience. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I apologise for what just happened. Let us move on to the next event! I sincerely hope that you enjoy the music and food! Please, enjoy yourselves!” he speaks, his hands moving to clasp together as he finishes his sentence. The crowd stays where they are, still reeling from the events that have already happened this evening. 

You turn your head to make brief eye contact with Namjoon, to find that he was already looking at you. He takes a step towards you and offers his arm to you. Smiling brightly at the man, you try to place your arm in his as elegantly as possible, knowing that the court is watching you. Once your arms are connected, Namjoon smiles down at you. His smile passed on words that his mouth couldn’t say at present.

You look behind you to see where your mother was, to find Yoongi offering her arm to your mother. Your siblings had been a part of the crowd and they would not be joining you for the dinner, which weirdly made you feel a little less nervous, as they wouldn’t be able to tell embarrassing stories of you growing up to the man you were about to marry. 

The walk to the separate room where the dinner would be held took about a minute. The large group of you meander down halls and through some doors before arriving at the final place. Inside the room was a table in a circular shape. There was one large throne-like chair similar to the one that was in the hall at the top of the table from where you were standing. To the left of that chair was another chair that almost looked like one of the throne room chairs. And to the right of that large throne-like chair were two more slightly decorated chairs. The other six chairs were decorated with the titles of the men who would be sitting there spread evenly around the circle. Namjoon led you to the chair to the right of the large chair. He pulled the chair out, making you blush, as it was very uncommon for a king to do this for anyone. Once you were sat, he did the same for your mother and then his own before sitting down. Looking around you, you noticed that everyone was smiling. You took this moment to look at what everyone was wearing, only having the chance to see what the King, the Queen Dowager, Yoongi and your mother had been wearing. The boys were all wearing various shades of red and white. The colour complements their skin brilliantly underneath the lamplight. It made their eyes shine even brighter than they already were. Taking in a deep breath you allow yourself to feel happy and content at this moment. You felt free and able to finally breathe. 

Moments, after you were all sat down, the doors opened and two lines of servants filed into the room, some holding food, some holding drinks, some had cups and some had cutlery. Before your very eyes, the things in their hands were set out in their perfect positions, cups were filled as well as plates and hearts were opened, as the conversation began. 

Namjoon manages to sneakily move his chair as close to you as he can without making the other boys jealous, which he knows will lead to the young ones play fighting, and who knows how that’ll end. Catching your eyes, he leans closer to you, and you lean closer to him. He speaks in a quiet tone, the smile showing in his eyes and on his lips. “Thank you for accepting my proposal, I promise I will make you the happiest woman alive, as you have made me and my boys- I mean men, the last few weeks” he speaks. 

“My king, do not fear, I know of the relationship between you and the boys- I mean men” you copy, making him laugh before you continue “I have come to love each and every one of you and I would be honoured to join your family”. The smile on Namjoon’s face when you tell him this, makes his smile larger, and a blush fall from his ears to his cheeks. Namjoon takes your hand before speaking again “Well if that’s the case then I can’t wait to marry you, and 50 days can’t come soon enough, Nae salang/Sarang”. Seconds later, he lets go of your hand before standing up to address the people in the room. 

Firstly, he turns to the servants “Thank you for your work, you may go and enjoy the party, this can all be cleared up tomorrow, tonight we celebrate.” Then he turns to the people at the table, clasping his cup, he brings it to the air “And to my family, let us celebrate a union of two families, let us celebrate love in all its forms and let us celebrate our blessings. To celebrating!” he says, lifting his glass every so slightly higher at the end of his statement. 

“To celebrating!” everyone yells in unison, with their classes similarly raised in the air to the kings. Once everyone has yelled out, Namjoon sits down, and the conversations re-begin. Memories are shared between people, laughter is heard and love is shared. In that room, love and happiness were evident for even a blind man to see and feel. 

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

The next day you woke up to a knock at your door. It was Hwasa waking you up. 

“Good morning your majesty,” she tells you “You have a busy day today, we must get you bathed and dressed”. 

“Please do not call me ‘Your Majesty’” you giggle to Hwasa, “you’ll give me an ego,” you tell her with a wink. She laughs alongside you, before taking your hand and bringing you back into the bathing room. “Today's bath will be shorter as you have a very busy day, I will come back and collect you when it is time, do you need anything else ma’am?” she asks. You smile and shake your head, excited to enjoy your bath no matter how long you would be in it. 

Stepping into the bath, you allow yourself to feel the warmth surrounding your body, the muscles that were tense from anxiety the past few days slowly releasing and making your body feel at ease. You dip your head into the bath, allowing your hair to enjoy the water as well. The bath is exactly what you needed this morning, and you were relieved that it was able to be added to your busy schedule. 

Around 15 minutes later, Hwasa walks back into the room, holding a long cloth that would dry you and a silken red robe with dragons embroidered into it. “The king and his men had this made for you. They had them make it as soon as you agreed to be the royal bride” she tells you. This information brings a smile to your face, and once your cloth is tied around you, you reach out for the robe, wanting to feel it in your hands. You place the robe delicately around your shoulders as you follow Hwasa out of the room, and into where you dressed each day. On your way, however, you noticed that all of your stuff had been placed into boxes. 

“Why is my stuff in boxes? I thought I was to stay…” your voice trembles, anxiety hitting you like a brick wall.

“Do not worry” Hwasa reassures, “you are staying, you are just being moved to a different courtyard closer to the king and his men, it is tradition. You will be transferred from the emerald apartment to the cherry blossom courtyard, which is on the other side of the cherry blossom garden. Oh, a letter has arrived for you today by the way!” 

“A letter? Who from?” you ask as Hwasa hands you the letter. You pull the wax away from the envelope and open it up. 

Her future royal highness, y/n, 

This letter was written to you regarding the royal engagement. It is a formal proposal letter. Please enjoy you’re new homing in the Cherry Blossom Garden. If you need anything, please do not hesitate to contact any of us. 

Sincerely, 

King Kim Namjoon 

And the boys

You giggled at the little addition at the bottom of the letter added by your boys, it made you even more sure that you were making the right decision. Folding the letter back up, you place it, along with the envelope on the dressing table near you. 

“Well then, I guess we had better get ready so we can see this new venue.” you grinned at her. 

Hwasa brings you over to the dressing table which still remained, sitting beautifully in front of two doors that would slide open. Realising this was your last day here, you decided to be bold and ask the woman, who had quickly become your friend, to open those doors whilst you had your hair and makeup done. She agreed but notified you that you must get dressed first, turning her hand towards the cotton figurine that stood in the doorway near your bedroom. Looking over at the hanbok you noticed the colour, it was a deep red colour, similar to the one you wore to the dinner the other day. And similar to the other, you noticed a gold band along the bottom of the skirt. Looking closer at it you noticed that it had been embroidered with both the seal of the dragon, one of royalty, and the seal of your house, tigers. Your heart lept with warmth and love at the thoughtfulness of your boys. A part of you felt weird calling them your boys when you haven’t had more than a crush before in your life. But in the same way, you have never felt more loved in your life. With a smile, you turned to Hwasa and stood to allow her to help you get ready. 

Once you were dressed, minus your gomusin and beoseon, you sat down and looked at yourself in the mirror as Hwasa opened the doors allowing the light to flood into the room. Feeling the warmth on your face, you felt at peace for the first time in a very long time. Hwasa and Hyo-Seong quickly moved on to applying your makeup and hair. The makeup was applied with a sense of regality that hadn't quite been there in the past times your makeup was done. Next was your hair, pulled in different directions and braided before being placed into an updo. Two matching hair pins are slid into the final hair-do, making it perfect. It still felt unreal to look at yourself in the mirror as your hair was done by two of the king’s servants. A sudden anxiety hit you as you realised you were to become the royal bride in less than 2 months. Noticing the anxious look on your face, Hwasa places a gentle hand on your shoulder, offering you a kind but small smile. 

“Your mother should be here soon, she was staying in the azurite apartment, but she will also be moving to the cherry blossom courtyard to stay with you until the wedding.” 

As soon as the words fell from her lips, the anxiety that was building in your heart melted away till there was barely any left. Hwasa smiled at your now relaxed face, before picking up your makeup and opening the bits she needed. 

“Now… let's do your makeup so we can go and see your new residence” Hyo-Seong smiled at the two of you. 

After a few minutes, your makeup was done and you stood from your seat, you took one last look at the view from where you had been sat before turning towards the door and putting on your beoseon and gomusin. Hwasa and Hyo-Seong each took a door and opened it, allowing you to exit from the apartment you had spent the last two weeks in for the final time. To your surprise, Yoongi and Namjoon were waiting outside, surrounded by some of their guards, whose faces you had come to recognise but had yet been unable to put a name to. Noticing that the doors had opened up, Namjoon and Yoongi looked up, seeing you. The smiles on their faces brought a smile to your own. 

Namjoon steps towards you, followed closely by the older but shorter man. The younger man reaches you within a few steps and greets you with a bow. The cat-like man followed his suit. Standing to full height once again, Namjoon grins at you. 

“Good morning my queen, I take it you know where you are to move to today?” he asked, the grin just as wide at the end of his question as it was at the beginning. Pretending that you didn’t know, you let the grin that was on your face fall. 

“Are you sending me home your Highness?” You asked with mock sadness on your face. Namjoon’s smile fell instantly, as did the man smile behind him. 

“NO!” He yelled, moving towards you, before pausing. “I'm sorry, I mean… I mean no you are not being sent home” he spoke in a calmer tone. You took a step closer to the man before speaking again. 

“Hmm,” you sighed, taking another step forward. “Well then…” you carried on, slipping your smaller hand into his much larger one. “I guess you’ll just have to guide me to wherever I am to be moved to today” you finished with a smile. Relief instantly flooded the men before you’s faces. Namjoons smile returned to his face, as he turned to Yoongi, “It looks like we have another prankster on our hands, don’t tell the maknaes, we need this one on our side.” Yoongi replied with a small nod of his head and a gorgeous smirk, agreeing with what the man before him had said, secretly planning pranks the two of you could do in his head. Namjoon grips your hand in his and turns towards the pathway that would take you to the cherry blossom courtyard. 

“Let us go, my queen” he spoke quietly into your ear.

Series taglist:

@skyys-universe @angel-121 @queen-in-the-shadows @iwishididntexist @hair1997 @unqiuecutieprincess @agusfree @treetops68 @sbromp @explorewithd @zmbo97 @maetyun @sgnsgssy @feedthefandoms995 @hajimaoppaa @emu007 @silverrr-spooon @el-insomnio-no-es-divertido @scentisterror @hey-syia @insert-a-creative-url-right-here @uniquelyabnormallyoriginal @poesreddeath @thedarkwinterrose @yoongiigolden @zae007live @namjinieesope @iamhereforbts

permanent tag list: @ewok7attack @marc-ella