Love Languages - Tumblr Posts
This is one of the main ways I show my affection. Most of the time I just give away stuff I've had for a while if I think others are gonna get joy out of it.
what people think gift giving as a love language means: *spending an excessive amount of money on materialistic gifts for people during the holidays*
what gift giving as a love language actually means: “i picked up this cool rock that i found on the ground that reminded me of you” or “i bought you this necklace for 50 cents at a yard sale cause i thought you’d like it” or even “i’ve had this thing since childhood but i feel like it could be of some use to you or give you comfort so i want you to have it”
What Is Your Future Partner's Love Language?
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Love Languages
Words of Affirmation
Showing the partner their love and admiration through words.
"You are so special to me."
"We are so lucky to have you."
"Did I tell you I love you today already?"
"You always know how to make me laugh."
"I just want you to know how proud I am of you."
"Wow! You look amazing!"
"I appreciate you so much."
"You are being so good to me."
"I'm so impressed with you."
"Thank you for everything you do for me."
"You make me so happy."
"I'm so lucky to have you."
"You are doing such a good job at this."
"No one makes me as happy as you do."
"I trust you with all of my heart."
"You are literally the best."
"I really enjoy spending time with you."
"Thank you for always listening to me."
"I really value your opinion."
"You have so much talent."
"I'm so happy to have you by my side."
"You're the kindest person I know."
"That was so thoughtful of you, I appreciate it."
More: 100 Compliments
Hugs in Film
karen shetty’s love language canonically being physical touch is very special to me <3
I know George mentioned quality time and acts of service as Edwin‘s love languages, but I’ve also always thought of words of affirmation as an important one for Edwin, so I made this compilation of all the words of affirmation from Edwin throughout the show.
Two observations from making this video: (1) video editing is way harder than I thought and the vision I‘d had in my head was much cooler than the end result, and (2) the instances of Edwin communicating approval or affection through words increase so much the further into the show we get. Made me think of how George said in so many interviews that Edwin’s journey in season one is about learning how to love, and I feel like the video really shows that and also that he learns to express that love, which is just so beautiful.
the worst trait of me and my family is probably this: we never learned to say the word sorry.
i) my best friend and i, we are no people. knives? maybe. liars? definitely. but people? i’m not so sure.
knives were never forged to be tender (what a shame, what a shame) and we too, fall and slay what we meant to protect. him and i, we go for the throat when we clash. we hurt and bleed and oh, i should be terrified, i should be running for my life, but all i am is tired and a bit lonely and would really like his arms around me.
( “can we please stop fighting now.”
“oh god yes please.”)
because time and time again, this man has held my heart in his hands and cleaned its festering wounds with cotton dipped in alcohol (always the healer, always the lover) and wrapped gauze around them with clinical precision. and i have walked through the maze of his head and tended to his withering garden, have dragged the sun and fresh air and all the oceans to the barren land to make it bloom (always the poet, always the lover).
him and i, we have never needed words because we are knives forged in the same fire and at the end of the day, we both know that he will be the one who wordlessly stitches my broken heart and i will be the one who sings him to sleep.
ii) let me paint you a picture:
blue that fades into red that fades into black that fades into blue that fades into red. loud, clashing and nonsensical. a pit in your stomach that was dug with desperation and blunt fingernails. how do you colour anger that is also pain, grief, hate, love, fear and truth? the smell of the paint is foul and clogs your windpipes. blunt fingernails and blue and black and madness. can you bear to look at what you created without flinching?
that’s what anger looks like on my father. a horror. a mottled bruise. a hellfire.
all his life, my father has been scorned, belittled, beaten, spat on. his mother didn’t love him right because her mother didn’t love her right. my dad loves like he hates. something is fucked in his head and heart and his words fade into black and blue and red and this shitshow always ends with me sobbing, bleeding, dying on the floor. my father watches with his hackles raised and his eyes red and wide and glowing. once wounded, an animal never sheathes its claws. it strikes the ones it loves and walks away with its head held high and hands trembling.
but here’s what happens when the curtains close: he pulls me into his arms and brings me tea. he wipes away my tears with hands that has moved mountains to make me smile. he kisses my forehead and tells me that his mom didn’t love him right. my grief is like anger and indignation and love. i wrap my arms around him and cry all the tears he never had the luxury to. who should say sorry, really? is it him or his mom or his mom’s mom or this stupid fucking world? my father has never said the word sorry. he never needed to. this is what love looks like on us. a horror. a mottled bruise. a hellfire.
iii) despite it all, i am not usually an angry person. i take after my father and my mother, after all. i rage like my mother (quick, loud, fire that burns out almost as quickly as it sparked to life) and fight like my father (aim, shoot, bullseye). my sister does something even mildly upsetting and before i know it, i’m cursing her to be miserable till she dies. not even an hour later i’m draping myself over her shoulder and bugging her till she rolls her eyes and smiles ever so slightly.
(“do you have no shame?”
“yeah no i don’t think so.”)
my family and i, we never learned to say the word sorry. because the word sorry never meant sorry, not to us. because at the end of the day, that’s all it is: a word. and it sticks to the back of my tongue and the dents of my molars and gets tangled in my mouth when i try to spit it out. so i grab it by its throat and thread it into my being. i find it so much easier to hide my pathetic inability to do one thing that doesn’t scream that there's something wrong with me with the truth of another three words:
“i love you”
and they are always echoed back to me, just a few million times more tender, in ways only we can understand.
“yeah, i know.”
“that’s great, but there’s no escaping dishes duty.”
“oh, shut up, you.”
“what’s that for?”
a pause and a hum.
“i love you too.”
~oh the the five love languages are fake~
ok sure but what's yours?
you're telling me that if i complimented you right now, or sat down next to you while we just breathed in synch watching the clouds you wouldn't feel a little loved??
what if i gave you a shiny rock that matched the color of your eyes or helped you clean those dishes you've been procrastinating on? or gave you an affectionate hug (high five option for my no-hug besties)?????
you wouldn't feel loved? not even a little bit??
Love Language
LOVE THROUGH ACTIONS, GESTURES, CARESSES AND PROXIMITY. LOVE THAT ISN'T FLUENT IN FLOWERY WORDS. LOVE THAT IS SUBTLY OBVIOUS, TANGIBLE, PRESENT.
"all my life i've felt as if i were waiting in a train station." – andrei tarkovsky
1. john berger, 2. @antropomorfisme, 3 + 5. gregory alan isakov, 4. maurice (1987, dir. james ivory + d.p pierre lhomme), 6. adam muise, 7. shinji moon, 8. @ashleyfrostart, 9. louise glück, 10. the 1975
I Like It When You Sleep For You Are So Beautiful Yet So Unaware Of It
a vds one shot. you can find more on my ao3.
( @ apolloswords )
feel free to comment/message me any suggestions for one shot ideas!
Sleepy Van Der Stoffels. That's it. That's all it is.
shoutout to @ pepethehobbit because the very first vds fanfic i read was her “it’s not living (if it’s not with you)” fic due to the 1975 song reference in the title. bonus points because that song is actually one of my all time favourites. <3
When Lucas and Jens first fell asleep together, both of them thought it would take quite a bit to get used to another person in each other's bed. The stillness of the night often begun with Lucas laying his head on Jens' arm, tapping his fingers lightly on his chest. Jens would have his own hand, laying flat against his chest as Lucas' fingertips danced about, sometimes grazing against the empty space between his fingers, just barely touching. Their breathing was slow and sometimes when the hours of slumber drew near, Lucas would hum to himself softly. It would send small vibrations through both of their body, almost as if they were two halves of one whole.
They often argued they were.
"You make the night time feel a lot like the day." Jens whispered, on another night he found himself in Lucas' room. Neither of them knew what numbered time this one was, but loosing track of it hardly mattered. He just didn't want to go home and he hardly ever did nowadays. So, without it taking much convincing, Lucas invited him to stay the night.
The dancing fingers on his chest didn't stop, as Lucas tilted his head up to look at Jens. The dark brown eyes were almost identical to the midnight sky, so dark that with just the flicker of light from the street lamp outside made them twinkle. The shadows of the night painted over the deeper parts of his face, while the light of the moon kissed the higher points gently, illuminating them. There was no doubt that Jens was beautiful, a figure of art that Lucas could spend eons working on capturing but could never compare. To Lucas, Jens was beyond the master pieces of a gallery. Beyond the paintings of Van Gogh, the sculptures of Michelangelo and the words of poets. To Lucas, Jens was something cut out from the clouds of heaven, intertwined with the galaxies and held the rest of the world in the palm of his hands.
"What?" Lucas asked, realizing he didn't exactly reply to Jens' statement. "What does that even mean?"
"Aren't you the one learning all those cryptic meanings and metaphors in your art classes? Wouldn't you be able to know what they mean?" Jens laughed, bringing the arm that held Lucas a bit closer to him. Lucas snuggled in closer into Jens' side, sighing at the softness of his shirt and warmth under his cheek.
He giggled back. "I do. But you aren't exactly a poet Jens, so I don't know if I have the expertise to understand what you mean."
"You must be failing your classes then."
"And you're not?"
Jens snorted and pretended to give Lucas an annoyed look. Lucas only grinned, the moonlight brightening his smile to the point where Jens couldn't help but smile back. He leaned forward a bit, and kissed Lucas' forehead gently. The strands of curls that hung loose on his forehead tickled him slightly when they pressed against his forehead, but the sparks from the kiss sent waves of sweet affection through his body.
"So what do you mean by that?" Lucas asked again, this time his voice much softer and hushed. His eyelids were beginning to feel heavy as his body began to melt into the mess of comfy sheets, soft pillows and blankets that held them in a gentle huddle.
"You manage to continue you making me feel so alive. And even now, I feel like I could run a marathon." Jens explained. His last statement was quickly counteracted with a yawn. Another yawn followed, but it didn't come from Jens. Lucas didn't even realize it was his, until he felt his body begin to drift off even more.
"Not me." Lucas murmured, his eyes basically shut tight now. "Maybe tomorrow."
"Good night my sleepy boy." Jens whispered, rubbing his hand up and down Lucas' back. The other one reached over, lifting off its initial placement on his chest to nestle his fingers into Lucas' curls.
He loved it when Jens played with his hair. It was often, usually only done when they were alone together. The first time Jens had done it was while they were watching a move in Jens' room. Both of them were leaning against Jens' headboard, while Lucas leaned on his shoulder. Then, as if it was a second nature to Jens, he reached out and light twirled a curl on the top of Lucas's head as his eyes intently focused on the movie on the laptop balanced on a stack of pillows. Lucas couldn't pay much attention after that. He could only focus on the way Jens' fingers lightly tugged on the curls, the strands intertwining around his fingers and the calm ease it put his whole body into. It was then when Lucas realized Jens' love language.
Touch.
He should've known before. The way Jens always leaned against him on benches as they waited for their friends, back when they were just friends. Then it would slowly escalate, Jens reaching out to pat his back when he felt Lucas feel nervous or tense. Then eventually, holding his hand whenever he could, having a hand on his lap if they were sitting down at a table with his friends. Sometimes, before Jens let their hands swing between them as they walked, he would place a soft kiss to his knuckles. Lucas always giggled at the sentiment. It always made Jens seem sort of regal, but in his own dorky way. Whatever it was, Jens always had a soft hold on Lucas.
Maybe that was why Jens liked sleeping over a lot. Whenever Lucas woke up, Jens would still have an arm holding him as his back pressed against Jens' flat and board chest. Or, on their second night, Lucas had woken up in the exact same position he had fallen asleep in. His head just slightly on Jens' chest, Jens' fingers resting lightly on his curls as his other one laid flat on his chest, rising up and down with his slow breathing movements. Lucas had no idea how he managed to sleep through the night without tossing around at least once. And it wasn't like he was a very restless sleeper either, but he did usually end up sprawled out into a different position than the one he fell asleep in. But upon knowing that Jens had held him the whole night, his heart melted and he found himself throwing an arm around Jens' waist, hugging him. He hoped not to stir Jens awake, but another thing Lucas learned was that when Jens slept, he slept.
"Good night. I love you." He felt himself mumble before his body completely slipped into a peaceful slumber.
“I love you too.”
Lucas wasn't completely wrong. Of course Jens liked to sleepover because of his chance to hold his wonderful boyfriend in his arms. It also helped that they didn't have to be apart, which Jens was also not too keen on. But what Jens loved the most, was making sure Lucas had a blissful sleep. During the day, he would often see Lucas look a little worried, like there was something that relentlessly bothered him and couldn't keep him at ease. Lately, his brows furrowed together more, the biting of his nails was more frequent and he always seemed to have his shoulders carrying his stress. He didn't know if it was from the turmoil of dealing with his rather absent father who had wanted to have a place in his life again, his mother and her medicine being inconsistent for her episodes and the pressure for the upcoming exam season. It could even be a mix of all three.
Whatever it was, it made Lucas look a little more drained. He never looked like he got enough sleep, eye bags becoming a bit darker and the colour in his face hardly making any presence. It worried Jens, and the one thing Jens disliked more than worrying was seeing his boyfriend worry.
So, that's why he wanted to stay the night. Stay every night if he could. Besides, it's not like anybody cared if he did stay over- Jens' family often understood, knowing how lonely Lucas was in the university dorms and the dormitory policies weren't very strict about visitors. He could stay every night if he wanted to. As long as Lucas wanted him to.
And knowing Lucas, that was absolutely in the equation. Jens noticed how much Lucas loved quality time. It could be one of his love languages. Lucas had been going on about love languages for awhile now, and while Jens did his best to understand them, he still never quite got them. Could you even have more than one language? To Jens, that was possible, because that was kind of how he saw everything in-between them. It was a language of their own.
Maybe Jens should make the argument that love languages didn't exist. That the one that did was the one they shared. And whether it was touch, quality time, words of affirmation or whatever else Lucas spewed on about, they all made up the way they were affectionate towards each other.
Touch. Jens holding Lucas in the still of the night, as the whispers of tomorrow lingered around them, promising things they were not yet aware of.
Quality time. Lucas spending hours in Jens' room, even if it was just laying on his bed as he studied his boyfriend, who was too busy whipping up some sort of musical masterpieces through his headphones.
Acts of service. Jens doing his best at mixing extra amounts of acrylic paints for Lucas to use on his paintings. Sometimes, most times, they never matched and the shades always slightly differed, but Lucas would just kiss his cheek and thank him anyway. Jens would then watch him blend the colours, focusing so hard to make it work. And, through some sort of miracle, they always did.
Receiving gifts. Whenever Lucas went to his favourite art store to pick up some new supplies, he always made sure to dig around in the small sticker bin before he left. The assortment was different each time, so it was always like a fun mystery to see what theme they had going on for that week. And each time, he picked one up and gave it to Jens, who excitedly put it on his skateboard. Overtime, it began to make a rather abstract mess of a collage, but the way Jens' eyes lit up at the small gift never dulled out.
Words of affirmation. Right now, when Jens took in the sight of his sleepy boy. The way Lucas' curls fell over his face and the pillow, his breathing slow and heavy against the side of his body his cheek rested on. Jens would always take in the smoothness of his face, no worry in sight. The only thing missing was the bright blue eyes that Jens could never get enough of, and the flush of pink on his cheeks when he smiled so hard at him. Other than that, he was the embodiment of an angel that had fallen down from the heavens. Which is why, Jens always leaned over and whispered to Lucas, but more to himself.
"I like it when you sleep for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it."
And when he said those words in the still of the night, he swore the moon shown brighter and the stars danced about the twilight sky, the same way Lucas fingers danced on Jens chest.
He should probably also argue that he felt a bit more alive during the night than the day. Knowing that he had Lucas all to himself, in the way that sometimes the day prevented him from doing so. But as the night began to seep into the later part of its ours and Lucas' sleepiness transferring over to Jens, he realized now it was to time for him to drift off. So, he settled in a bit more, into the blue blankets and towards the radiating heat from his sleepy boy, and snuggled into the mess of curls that had became one of his favourite things in the world.
Maybe he'd do that tomorrow.
Hey, uh, how the fuck do I figure out what my love languages are? Both giving and receiving?
be sure to understand ur s/o’s way of showing affection and make them aware of yours.. some ppl show affection by buying u things and some ppl will say I love u a million times and some will make u breakfast some will leave u the last ice cream, but it’s really important to know about these things bc u could not notice them and feel unloved while your s/o feels taken for granted and it’s just all a big misunderstanding so please talk about these things
Some TMNT love language headcanons! This is mostly meant platonically but if you want to apply it romantically go for it ig (That does not include Tcesters, you nasties, get out of here.)
2012:
LEO LIKES:
Receiving: Quality Time Giving: Acts of Service
RAPH LIKES:
Receiving: Physical Touch Giving: Quality Time
DONNIE LIKES:
Receiving: Words of Affirmation Giving: Gift Giving
MIKEY LIKES:
Receiving: Physical Touch Giving: Physical Touch
RoTTMNT:
RAPH LIKES:
Receiving: Words of Affirmation Giving: Physical Touch
DONNIE LIKES:
Receiving: Words of Affirmation Giving: Acts of Service/Gift Giving
LEO LIKES:
Receiving: Words of Affirmation/Physical Touch Giving: Physical Touch
MIKEY LIKES:
Receiving: Physical Touch Giving: Physical Touch
I can't keep having the same conversations about love languages, mbti, iq, bmi, "brain fully formed at 25" and shit over and over again...
Erik Lehnsherr - love language headcanons
💕 fluff
showing his love: quality time and gift giving
he enjoys cooking together or playing chess, even just being in the same room together
he makes little trinkets and sometimes even jewellery out of metal
to an outsider it might seem like he doesn't care much or that he's inattentive, but he listens
he makes sure you never run out of your favourite tea, snacks, alcohol etc. and whatever else you mention, will magically appear sooner or later in your room
he is the type of person to come home with an absurd amount of whatever you mentioned liking the day before
also, that man is touch starved as fuck
so while he might not actively reach out to you, in the beginning at least, he does enjoy receiving physical affection
meaning, the way he feels loved/likes to receive love is physical touch
i guarantee you this man will melt when you run your fingers through his hair or snuggle up against him
when you two fall asleep together he will hold you close in his arms so that he knows you're safe
he absolutely adores it when you two stand close together and you reach your hand out to cup his cheek, letting him lean into it
whenever sitting besides each other he will put his arm up behind you on the backrest
he would never admit it but he definitely is a little bit disappointed if you don't lean into him when he does it
Why I Can’t Bring Myself to Tell My Friends I Love Them
I used to tell my friends that I loved them all the time. If I saw them doing something I thought was cute, or if they made an awesome joke, or if they tried their hardest on something, or when I would get the occasional rush of gratitude for them, I would tell them. Love was meant to be expressed when they were still there to receive it, and love was meant for everyone. I wanted everyone to know that love was meant to be given liberally.
Back when my ex best friend cared about me, she was so supportive. She would tell me that there was good in the world and there were things to be living for, and she would always be so happy and in love with life. She was a small person, with a round face and the warmest hugs, and she would tell me that I was worth it. That I was worth loving, that I was amazing, that I made her life better. My second new best friend does that too. She does all of that. They’re different people, but in terms of what they provide me they’re nearly the same, and in terms of appearance, they look similar. And that scares me because there’s a reason my ex best friend is no longer my friend, and to see the same feelings start for someone similar is terrifying.
When I finally acknowledged my first best friend after moving on from the last one, I noticed she was giving me everything my ex best friend couldn’t, but I was resigned to the idea that she wasn’t as verbally or physically affectionate. I still love that best friend, but those are my love languages, and I don’t usually get them from other people. And then my second best friend came into my life and gave me exactly what I wanted and needed that was missing from my first best friend. But now there’s a problem. Because my first best friend isn’t very verbally affectionate, she probably wouldn’t like it if I told her I love her, and even if she did, I would be opening up to her too much and that might push her away. My second best friend would absolutely love it if I told her I loved her, but I’m too worried that I’ll put all my energy into that friendship only to slowly realise that I’m not getting anything back.
I want to love them. I do love them. And I always thought it was a cliché motivation when a character was like “I’ve been hurt before and I don’t want to be hurt again”, but that is exactly how I feel and I couldn’t even trust my second best friend when she told me that she would always care about me because that’s what I told my ex best friend and now I hate her with a burning passion. I hate songs like “Night Changes” or “The One That Got Away” because they remind me that something you think will be infinite could end within a moment, and I hate reading fanfics where characters end up far away from each other with no possible way of regaining the relationship they had before and/or in canon because that’s the truth of life. People will come and go and you can’t do anything about it. Love is never going to be enough if it’s only going one way. Life isn’t a show where everything comes full circle; there are going to be loose ends and regrets and there will be no consolation or closure and everyone leaves eventually no matter how much you or they care. I love my best friends now but if I admit it to them then it solidifies the idea that there’s something to lose, and I can’t stand that. I don’t want to be hurt again. Despite how genuine my best friends may be right now, there will be a day where they don’t care. I don’t want to reach that day. I don’t want it to continue to that point. I don’t want to tell them I love them.