Shblr - Tumblr Posts

10 months ago

My cheeks are all cut open

My gums are tender

My fingers bleeding and stinging

The meds are making me sick

My body is giving up on me just as they all did before


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10 months ago

to anyone and everyone who wants to go deeper: don't

you will never be satisfied. there is never a depth where you say "okay this is enough" once you start down the path of going deeper you never stop. there's no end point. it's agonizing.

your self harm is serious enough as it is, you don't have to go deeper for it to be serious. you don't have to have scars. you don't have to hit the dermis or the fat for it to be real. it's real, it's serious.

there is nothing glamorous about deeper. it's not worth it.


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10 months ago

I use sexual relationships as self harm because,

if I just give my body away it won't be mine anymore. I won't have to deal with it anymore.


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10 months ago

Is it bad that I really love how my sh looks? It's so pretty, fresh and with scabs.


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10 months ago

People who refuse to understand that cvtting for attention is valid make me so, so angry. Because i'm not talking about someone who does it because they want to hurt someone else/do it as "revenge" against someone to make them feel bad, I'm talking about someone who cvts to get attention because they know something is wrong, but they don't know what that something is and they can't articulate it.

If someone is resorting to cvtting themselves to get you to look at them and pay attention to them and you brush it off as just being dramatic and attention seeking, you're not helping. And usually, a lot of us hide our sh for a reason! Even if we've been clean for a while! I hid my scars for nearly a year because I didn't want anyone to know, but even if I didn't even if I showed someone to ask for help in the only way I knew how, that would've been valid.


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10 months ago

tw self harm mentions

ok, have to say this again.

shblr! For the love of everything, STOP TAGGING SH RECOVERY ON YOUR PICS OR RELAPSE POSTS?! sorry to say it but shut the fuck up maybe? Post whatever the hell you want but STOP tagging recovery when your post is NOT about it, at all. I am trying to stay clean, stop trying to drag people down with you. Your so annoying like please I’m begging you, stop tagging sh recovery your hurting others by posting your sui ideation for those keeping clean/trying to stay clean to read.

if your mad about this then YOUR the problem.


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9 months ago

i wish he would cut me. i want him to hold my wrist tenderly and slide the blade through my veins as he kisses my forehead and praises me for taking it so well. maybe he'd even wash and bandage them afterward and give me aftercare. i want to experience that intimacy of inflicting and receiving pain together. i want i want i want


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9 months ago

remembering when my then adult boyfriend told 16 year old me that my self harm was hot. no wonder i'm fucked


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9 months ago

πšƒπš‘πš’πšœ πš’πšœπš—'𝚝 πš’πš˜πšžπš› πšπšŠπšžπš•πš πš”πš’πš. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 πšπš’πšπš—'𝚝 πš”πš—πš˜πš  πšπš‘πšŽπš’ πš πšŽπš›πšŽ πšπš‘πš’πš—πš”πš’πš—πš πšŠπš‹πš˜πšžπš πš’πš. πšƒπš‘πšŽπš’ πš›πšŽπšŒπšŽπš—πšπš•πš’ πšœπšŠπš’πš πšπš‘πšŽπš’ πš πš˜πš—πš 𝚍𝚘 πš’πš πšŠπšπšŠπš’πš—. πš’πšπšœ πš˜πš”πšŠπš’ .... 𝚈𝚘𝚞 πšπš’πšπš—'𝚝 𝚍𝚘 πšŠπš—πš’πšπš‘πš’πš—πš 𝚝𝚘 πš™πš›πš˜πšŸπš˜πš”πšŽ πš’πš

I feel like a bad influence....

This is my fault....

I Feel Like A Bad Influence....

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10 months ago

tw: sh

oh shit that was deeper than expected. Well at least I’m getting further than baby styros now. I think I kinda feel more valid? ( which is stupid because all sh no matter how β€œbad” it is is valid)

Although I was in the school bathroom when I did it and in a stall which I quickly discovered had no toilet paper left in it. There was a lot of blood. My leg hurts


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