Many People In One Body.

Many people in one body.

🌸When you dont feel like you know who you are, it can be the loneliest feeling in your own body. AIR signs sun/moon/mercury/venus have this tendency to become a different person with different people. It does not have to be with an ulterior motive. It is just thst they are predisposed to adapt to the social cues.

🌸Water sign in 5th house can give a dreamlike and dissociative personality. You escape into a world of make believe. Sometimes it might feel like a compulsion. Without it, the life feels utterly dull and tiring.

🌸Incompatible placements in one chart aka air-water or earth-air combination is like universe's way of making your life harder than it needs to be. You spend your energy fighting with yourself and creating a stable self.

🌸Do you ever look back and wonder "who the hell was that person?" You recall having friends but you dont remember who you were, what value you offered them in friendship, why they chose you in their friend circle. That is just you shedding skin as an 8th house native. 8th house can make you twice born. You were born once from your mom's womb. You were born again when you built yourself up from ground up. Literal self development.

🌸7th house sun/moon/mercury is not really a social charmer placement, that would be 11th house. 7th house is one on one connections, especially romantic. It can make native be like relationship is the sole purpose of thier life. You were born to marry and work on your relationship. It can make you so dependent that you cannot even function when you are single. You need that other half to be there. It just feels like a team strength.

🌸People who think they are sure of themselves are the ones who are the most unsure. People in TV/video/pictures/screen appear to be flawless and confident. But the screen just eliminates their anxiety and rawness. Learn human skills from the people around you not the ones on TV or cinema. They exaggerate their expressions, rehearse their dialogue and everything is edited and filtered. Real life has flaws, spontaneity, anxiety, raw intimacy and to be able to think on your feet.

🌸In Persona by Ingmar Bergman, Alma is the talkative, expressive and soulful self while Elisabet has chosen to remain silent, running from her past and a cold person. "Her problems is that her notions dont match her life experiences". People are not one person all the time, at every moment of their life. People change. Personality changes. Personality happens to people. We do things we never imagined ourselves capable of doing. It is scary to think you can be an unpredictable beast and surprise yourself by what you end up doing. It is like you cannot even trust yourself. Two women battling their guilty conscience. Emotions they did not choose to feel. Stuck in existantial question of who they are and why they suffer. Are the two the same person? I am a different person in my head, i look different, act different, everything is much easier in the head and the two lives coexist together. I think that the person in my head is not really me, it is some other girl I am fascinated with at the moment. So in my head, I am who I think I will be if I was like that other girl, makes sense? Something in her hooks my lackings, whether it is her extraversion or ability to befriend people or social confidence or looks or a hobby that is not mine. I live through the girl in my head another life, with another life theme, another life story, another persona. When you are like that, how can you be one person in one body?

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Survival Of The Fittest

For those who are affected by Scorpio/8th house/12th house: scorpio rising/moon in scorpio/venus in scorpio/moon in 8th house/venus in 8th house/pluto in 1st house/pluto in 8th house/pluto in 12th house/12th lord in 8th house/7th lord in 8th house/8th lord in 7th house/inner planets in 8th house/Saturn in 8th house/Sun in 12th house

The phrase 'Survival Of the Fittest' was coined by Herbert Spencer after he was inspired by Charles Darwin's On the Origin of Species. Spencer drew parallels between his own economic theories and Darwin's biological theories and said "This survival of the fittest, which I have here sought to express in mechanical terms, is that which Mr. Darwin has called 'natural selection', or the preservation of favoured races in the struggle for life." We, in astro community, can draw a similar parallel to the astrological theories that indicate a difficult emotional, psychological, mental, physical, fated and spiritual life. Even Carl Jung associated collective unconscious to the genetic memory that exists in all of humanity universally.

Survival of the fittest means that organisms that are better adapted to their environment are best suited to survive and successfully reproduce. It also explains how evolution occurs in species by means of natural selection of those traits that are better adapted to a given set of environmental conditions. We read all this in school textbooks and forget it all when we walk into the real world.

Having difficult 8th house/12th house placements is like the Sisyphean task when he was condemned to roll a boulder up a hill, only to have it fall near the top, forcing him to start over and over again. This is what it feels like to be battling the unknown, unseen, intangible psychic forces of the 8th and 12th houses that emerge in the awareness from time to time endlessly. You are stuck in a situation that you cannot explain in words so you seek answers in symbolism, esoteric, dreams, psychology, magic and otherworldly pursuits because your problems are simply not visible to the naked eyes.

4. The paradox of life is that even though we are born with difficult life stories, the world does not have space for the weak, dependent, miserable. On one hand, this creates isolation, victim mentality, bitterness, "nobody understands me", "society is so insensitive to mental health issues". But on the other hand, we realize that we are just animals, some really smart animals that can think, write, civilize, earn money, reproduce, make laws, run the system, yet we are just animals in the hands of natural laws. The law of nature, therefore, is survival of the fittest, to become strong, adapt, improvise, improve, evolve, grow.

5. The point of this post is not laziness but exhaustion/victim mindset/bitterness/feeling left behind tendencies in native who had to spend a lot of times in healing, battling their psychological issues that appear invisible to the physical eyes and living with a sense of "what is wrong with me?"

6. To them, I just want to say that do not let the exhaustion tear you down. The environments of 8th and 12th houses are such emergency provoking, life threatening, dark, hidden, unknown, distant from physical life, invisible to naked eyes, emotionally draining and psychically charged. How you learn to accept your fate and live along with it is in your hands. I too had to come to terms with the constant ups and downs of my story, the sudden detours and catastrophe of my story, sometimes the sadistic undertones and stagnancy of my story, but in the end I realized that I was the saviour to my own fallen angel. Whether it is my past life karma, intergenerational karma or random allotment of fates, I would not live in bitterness and envy of those who have it easier, better and colourful. Learning to adapt to the environments of 8th and 12th houses is a real challenge, a very difficult one, not written in books but usually comes to knowedge intuitively and that is why it is so hard to understand and codify in language.

7. Finally, I do not have any advice or rulebook for 8th/12th housers, for each person has their own unique solution. I would just like to say that time is running out, you have already seen the theme of your life until now, be brave, pull yourself up and make peace with your traumatic memories. And maybe, find attract people who are also in a similar attitude as you. People who understand when you say "No I don't want to watch a movie right now, I want to journal some of my thoughts and emotions."

About venus in 8th house & attracting envy or jealousy.

"When an inner situation is not made conscious, it appears outside as fate."

About envy/jealousy: Envy is an emotion which occurs when a person lacks another's quality, skill, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it. Whereas, Jealousy generally refers to the thoughts or feelings of insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety. There is a difference between these two mental states and the venus in 8th house can attract both or either of these situation with people.

Why Venus in 8th house: It probably has to do with the energy of the native. They have the reputation of attracting envy from people, especially women, while it can be attributed to their (a) penetrating energy such that being near them make you feel like you are naked and all your secret thoughts and desires are exposed to these native; but it can also be attributed to the (b) feelings of envy in the native themselves. Venus in 8th house native not only attracts envious people, but also envies other people. They might envy others based on their good fortune, looks, achievements and emotional states. Yes, emotional states, as in others being happy/carefree can trigger envy in the native, especially because the venus in 8th house is a very difficult placement both (a) emotionally and (b) fate/destiny wise.

What is emotional pattern: Emotional pattern of thinking is how you think and feel all the time. This appears to be a negligible thing because we work on autopilot but the way we behave is driven by our thoughts and feelings, however unconscious they may be. Once you are self aware that you feel envious of others, try to go micro and see the exact thought pattern how this emotion generated. You have to go to the atomic level of your thoughts and see the thought that creates the daily loop and once identify it, you have to break it and replace it with another thought pattern. Do not keep repeating the same thoughts and torture yourself endlessly. Yes, I know you have it hard in life but when we cannot change the external circumstances, we are called to change the internal reaction to those circumstances that we call fate. If we do not awaken to the ignored and shadow side of our personal unconscious, it will keep manifesting in external reality by attracting toxic people and events until you finally awaken.

Hope it makes sense.

Why are Scorpio placements eccentric or unconventional?

This is in reply to a post by @astroismypassion and about Scorpio placements in general.

1. It intrigued me to know that scorpio placements strive to be unconventional and subjective in terms of academics, romance, hobbies, friends and even thoughts, ideas, opinions. They actively want to be different from the herd walk and frequently use the metric "Is everybody doing it? If yes then it is not worth doing. I will do what nobody else is doing." There is also the tendency to enjoy time by oneself alone and be very self aware of their behaviour, words, actions, emotions, thoughts, reactions. Once you identify what a scorpio looks like, you can start seeing a pattern in how MATURE scorpios think, act and live. They are all quite the same or similar.

2. Scorpio is the sign that falls on 8th house and is ruled by Mars and Ketu (vedic) or Pluto (tropical). Almost all mature scorpios have inclination towards self actualization because their feeling function is dominating. Since their method of relating to others is feeling based, they are very aware of how other people act and behave. They reflect upon themselves and find if they have the same qualities as others. It makes them yearn for originality and being unique, especially if their ego and self esteem is weak. One can say that scorpios have the predisposition towards being initiated in terms of spiritual and psychological development.

3. Since 8th house also deals with sudden, tumultuous and catastrophic events in life, scorpios are deeply affected by life events and strive to transform themselves in ways that they can control their life better, avoid pitfalls the next time catastrophe happens and fear losing control or being powerless. They cannot just take it lightly because it is about their power and power is a necessary evil in life.

4. My next theory is that all of us are acting on our active complexes. Carl Jung said about emotions that they are the involuntary reactions from active complexes. He said that emotions and feelings are not synonymous but different. Feeling, sensation, thinking, intuition are psychological functions while emotion is the fire that fuels the behaviour in the native. What it means is that a self aware person knows that their behaviour stems from a core complex and they yearn to solve that problem rather than live in neurotic state with intense guilt, shame, regret and self criticism. For example, they can identify mommy issues in themselves and others; once they identify, they try to outgrow the complex and overcome embarrassing behaviours.

There can be no transforming of darkness into light and of apathy into movement without emotion.

5. Scorpio can also be said to have primitive tendencies because of their preoccupation with the collective unconscious. They are always reading, judging, thinking others and doing self reflection. They are thinking of why people are the way they are, what is their shadow side, insecurities, weaknesses, psychological issues? With high self awareness comes also the awareness of karma or action/reaction. They are moved by the suffering, sickness, poverty, problems in the world and fear they might face the same fate if they do not live in high morality and ethics.

6. For most of the air/fire signs, it can be said that they are so insecure in so many ways that they do not even know how much they are lacking, but water sign's sensitivity gives them ability to read the room and actively work on their psychological development. As for the claim that scorpio placements look down upon others as being superficial, I think this happens because of their life circumstances and bitter life lessons that make them go deeper, psychoanalyze themselves and others, find deeper meaning in life and deal with intense complexes constantly.

7. As to why scorpio males and females act differently, we might have to look into places outside astrology like how society works, culture, how society treats men v/s women, what kind of behaviours are rewarded and know that behaviour is not proof of inner life. A promiscuous scorpio is not like that because they like sex so much or they like to charm others, it might be because they feel so powerless in other area of their life that promiscuity gives them power over some people & makes them feel important. The opposite of Scorpio is Taurus which is concerned with stability, rigidity and loyalty. Loyalty is about self preservation, not wanting to lose what they have invested in, emotional security and expectation that "if I stay loyal, my partner will also reciprocate too".

8. To conclude, signs and houses should be viewed together in opposites because they exist like that in consciousness and shadow. As I have matured, I begin to see that people cannot be viewed in polarities and indeed scorpio placements will display the traits of taurus even if is it an empty house because they are trying to understand themselves through people and events.

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Venus in scorpio/8th house/conjuct pluto/scorpio rising/pluto in 1st house: Malena

Envy, lust, provokes insecurities in others, provokes sexual desires, provokes fear and shame in others. Manipulative, controlling, abusive lovers. Men who are immature, infantile and puer aeternus are attracted to her, obsessed with her, want to use her, take advantage of her. Why do spiritually powerful women attract perverts and parasites? What is the pattern here? What is written in fates?

Charming, magnetic, sensual, feminine. Her silence captivates and threatens. Why doesn't she speak? What does she hide? Why is she so private? Why doesn't she smile? Why is she so powerful? Her life is transformed after marriage, after the news of death of her husband, after death of her father, after court trial where she was accused of adultery, after social beating and outcast. Her looks transform with seasons of life. Self destruction and reconstruction. Renewal of identity. Renewal of spirit.

Attention puller. Men of all ages are obsessed with her. She is so powerful that the whole town hates her. Witch hunting. Subject of sexual fantasies. Character assassination. Stalker, abuse, voyeurism, sex, sex and sex. Life is sex, life is libido. She corrupts everyone, a home wrecker? Nah, all she does is provoke the darkness and shame in men, just with her existence. Slut shaming and abuse. Insecure women are her enemy - if only they could see their ugliness. Death and rebirth, tragedy of life, dark days - darker than the darkest.

When I watched this movie, I found nothing funny about it. Not the silliest of jokes, not the desires of the kid boy. If anything, this movie was scary to watch because I know that women are actually treated this way, especially women with dark astrological placements. What is the life lesson here? Justice - we cannot trust the courts of law. What is the punishment for somebody's envy and insecurity? Darkness is treated with darkness. The strongest poisons make the best medicines.

Last night with her (venus in 8th house)

I can't forget what happened last night,

It felt like the night would never end,

And when it did, I knew I wouldn't be the same again.

She took something from me,

I have been empty since her,

I have barely lived after she left.

She touched my wounds at midnight,

And by 4 AM, I was in her arms,

Crying out my secrets to her,

She possessed me and I haven't been the same since her.

I am ruined, nobody else can be her,

She ruined my life, how can I move on from that night?

In that night we lived an eternity,

A 1000 years in past and a 1000 years in future,

We knew everything together.

She promised me she will be there in the morning,

I woke up and found her still there like we agreed,

She kept her promise, I sighed,

She had shed her skin and left it as it is.

Thank you for this gift,

But she took my soul in exchange,

Now I have to spend these bland nights alone,

Until we die, till we reunite.