Beach Body - Tumblr Posts
“Need all the protein I can get to fuel these muscles!” 💪🏽 🥩
I hope to obtain a physique like his own day and be proud to show it off at the beach.
Arnold Vosloo
Perhaps this could be my motivation picture to obtain a beach body physique like his... what do you think? Send me a message and let’s talk about our physique goals.
Woah!
2 step guide to having a beach body!
1) Have a body.
2) Take it to the beach!
Sun out, Speedo’s on, showing the world what a man he is.
Whether it’s his striated delts, his cobra-flared lats or his vascular quads, there isn’t a single guy on that beach who isn’t now painfully aware they made the wrong choices in life.
Don’t make the same poor life choices they did.
Choose muscle. Choose masculinity.
The public beach just didn’t click with Brad. How was it his feet could wear thongs but his butt couldn’t? Brad saw nothing wrong with his body. No one could. He was living proof it was the train of thought was offensive. Just one more reason outside of perfection, people scared Brad more than anything. He was glad he wasn’t online. He’d have at least ten thongs on his credit card by now.
Brad swore he heard a dog whistle.
Chris wasn’t really disappointed. Pink was never really totally gay to begin with. Pank. Well, that’s a different story. Hayyyyy!!!!
It was true. Brad and Chris did string eachother along. That was OK.
Art by Breyette
Gustavio seemed a little full of himself. Neither Brad or Chris ever wore a watch. They didn’t have a tv nor felt it necessary to make weather people feel insecure about their jobs more than they already were. They did haute coture runway just as well if not better. So what if they were from America.
While Brad and Chris gallented in greener pastures, Gustavio furiously ran every red light. Admittedly, a feat in itself on an island without a single traffic signal. Now why did we start talking about this goon?
Oh yeah. He’s like REALLY HOT. Allegedly also a person just like us, Brad and Chris. Don't worry. We hold our doubts about us too. Namely who’s who. We can't tell ourselves. That’s how we know somethings real. Whut exactly is real TBD. TBA or just the T. Sometimes Y.
Whatev. Just horny right now. HEY. Who's THIS GUY?!?! He is... UGGHHH! Gustavio.
How the hell do eyes have corners anyway? Can we just NOT?!
Nothing about Luke’s diagnosis was funny. Brad found himself laughing anyway. Why wouldn’t it stop? Then Brad thought it might be better just to go on with it. Maybe Luke would just go away. If only he didn’t live next door. Oh God. Was he still laughing?! This was way past explanation. Maybe Chris would take a picture.
(Click!)
What ‘did it all’ mean? Was it every position? Every person? Was it even related to sex?!? Was there anything that wasn’t? Chris began to wonder if he might just be too low maintenance.
Brad was 4lorn. Y?! oh Y?! did he wear whitie tighties 2go 2 the beach?!? And why did he suddenly want to go to gay bingo @ Hamburger Mary’s?!?
Martin Ivanov ♡
Chris assured beach patrol Brad was correct. No glitter. No angel wings. No problem. The outfit not only surpassed guidelines but was nothing short of a beacon of beach fashion. Now what exactly was beach patrol doing about this sand situation? It seemed like a lot and not difficult to imagine some of it would end up in the car for the next umpteen weeks.
Jose can’t see. Too much sun.
That’s ok. Brad can see the new model intern is fine. Really fine actually.
Chris just confirmed peeking around the corner. Jose is packing it.
All is well then.
Chris wasn’t sure exactly what happened but he knew is left cheek was sore. Or was it the right? Why wouldn’t this pain just go away?!
Ohhh Ouch. There it was again.
Well, that ruled out ‘left.’
Brad didn’t know. There was just a lot going on. Yes, this was the second time he wore briefs to the beach instead of a speedo, but at least this time he wore black.
Chris affirmed Brad’s less see through garment as a technical step up on a public beach but not necessarily for a gay man. He also repeated his intention to inform not judge as he gave Brad another look over. Indeed, Brad looked great regardless. It wasn’t the end of the world, but briefs would take longer to dry.
To keep the positive vibe in spin, Brad then pointed out they successfully brought beach towels with them and not sheets like they did by accident the other week. Those were still wet. Ick!
“I don’t know what we’re looking for Brad. It could be anything. Just like you, I’m only ‘looking’ because they gave us these matching swimmers with $100 inside. Do we even know these people?”