Incorrect Bsd Quotes - Tumblr Posts

Dazai: I'm in love with you. Chuuya: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork. Dazai: I know. Chuuya: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Soukouku at its finest🤣🤣🤣

Dazai : " Are we fighting or flirting ? "

Chuuya : " My hands are literally wrapped around your neck."

Dazai : " That doesn’t answer my question."

Kouyou: Let's try an exercise. You tell each other one thing you like about the other.

Dazai: I like your smile.

Chuuya: Seriously?

Dazai: No. I actually love how you can kill someone in two seconds.

Chuuya: I like the fact that you are aware of my skills. So sleep with an eye open, bastard.

Kouyou: I give up...

Atsushi, concerned, carefully looking at Ranpo, thinking to himself: Ranpo-san seems so tense, I bet something important is on his mind. Ranpo, concentrating: Thinking about which one of his sweets he should eat first*

Is this canon or what...?🚶🏻‍♀️

Generating Incorrect Quotes For The Hunting Dogs Pt.1💀

Teruko: Truth or dare? Jouno: Dare. Teruko: I dare you to kiss the hottest person in the room. Jouno: Hey? Tachihara, blushing: Yeah? Jouno: Can you move? I'm trying to get to Tecchou.

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Jouno: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?? Tecchou: Microwave for 40 minutes. Teruko: Why were you microwaving a lemon??? Tecchou: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells. I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges but I didn't own any pots. Tachihara: You burned an orange too? How??? Tecchou: Microwave for 40 minutes.

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Tachihara: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute. Jouno: No, that's not how you make cookies. Tecchou: FLOOR IT!! Tachihara: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!? Jouno: YOU'RE GONNA BURN THE BASE DOWN- Tachihara: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES! Teruko: DO IT! Jouno: NO-

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Teruko: Why is Tecchou crying on the floor?Tachihara: They took one of those 'what person are you?' quizzes. Teruko: And? Tachihara: They got Jouno.

Help-💀,From TheSwordThatStabbedJouno

Generating Incorrect Quotes For The Hunting Dogs Pt.2💀

Teruko: *sees Tecchou and Jouno together* Teruko: They're cute. I would put them on a boat. Tachihara: You mean... you ship them? ---------------------------------------------------- Tecchou: How did none of you hear what I just said?! Teruko: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours. Tachihara: I got distracted halfway through. Jouno: Ignoring you was a conscious decision. ---------------------------------------------------- Tachihara: You're smiling. What happened? Jouno: What? Can't I smile just because I feel like it? Teruko: Tecchou tripped and fell down the stairs today. ----------------------------------------------------Jouno: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container. Tecchou: The cow?? Jouno: What? Tachihara: Tecchou, W H Y? ---------------------------------------------------- Teruko: Words ending in 'ie' just sound so adorable. Like cutie, sweetie, cookie- Tachihara: Eyy, homie! Tecchou: But then there's cootie... Jouno: Die. ----------------------------------------------------Tecchou: I truly believe that water can solve all your problems. Tachihara: Weight loss? Drink water. Teruko: Clear skin? Drink water. Jouno: Want to get rid of someone? Drown them.

Incorrect Quotes ADA Style Pt.1🤪

Yosano: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Ranpo will and will not eat. Dazai: Grass? Yes! Yosano: Moss? Yes!! Dazai: Leaves? Ohh, yes! Yosano: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Dazai: Worms? Sometimes! Yosano: Rocks? Usually nah. Dazai: Twigs? Usually! Yosano: Kunikida's cooking? Inconclusive! Atsushi: How did you… test this? Yosano: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Atsushi: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Kunikida: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT? ---------------------------------------------------- Kunikida: You're a lying piece of shit! Ranpo: Oh yeah? You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Dazai: I'm leaving and I'm taking Atsushi with me! Yosano, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today. ---------------------------------------------------- Atsushi: *visiting the ADA* Hello, I just came to- Atsushi: *sees Kunikida shoving Dazai into the washing machine while Ranpo records and Yosano watches* Atsushi: *retreating* Something suddenly came up. ---------------------------------------------------- Yosano: Good morning. Atsushi: Good morning. Kunikida: Good morning. Dazai: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit. Ranpo: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!

Incorrect Quotes ADA Style Pt.2🤪

Kunikida: What do you do when someone offers you drugs? Dazai: Take them! Ranpo: Punch them in the neck! Atsushi: Say thank you! Yosano: Offer them more drugs to assert dominance! Kunikida: … Kunikida: No. ---------------------------------------------------- Atsushi: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Yosano: Several traffic violations. Dazai: Three counts of resisting arrest. Kunikida: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Ranpo: Also, that’s not our car. ---------------------------------------------------- Atsushi: Where’s Dazai? Ranpo: Doing stuff. Atsushi: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Kunikida? Ranpo: Trying to stop Dazai from doing the stuff. Atsushi: And Yosano? Ranpo: Trying to stop Kunikida from stopping Dazai from doing the stuff. Atsushi: I see. And what are you doing here, Ranpo? Ranpo: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Yosano from stopping Kunikida from stopping Dazai from doing the stuff. ---------------------------------------------------- Ranpo: Time for plan F. Yosano: Don’t you mean plan B? Ranpo: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties. Kunikida: What about plan D? Ranpo: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago. Atsushi: What about plan E? Ranpo: I’m hoping not to use it. Dazai dies in plan E. Dazai: I like plan E. ---------------------------------------------------- Kunikida: Now I can't have food! Atsushi: You can eat a rock. Yosano: Air. Ranpo: The fabric of time and space. Dazai: Chugging a bottle of bleach can solve all your problems. Kunikida: You guys are not helpful. ---------------------------------------------------- Dazai: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff. Atsushi: I witnessed the dumb stuff. Yosano: I recorded the dumb stuff. Ranpo: I joined you in the dumb stuff. Kunikida: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!

Decay Of Angles Incorrect Quotes🤓

Fyodor: Pfft, you should meet Nikolai, they're such a tsundere. Sigma: They... they just stabbed you. Fyodor: So cute. ---------------------------------------------------- *playing twister* Sigma: Right hand red. Nikolai: *ends up on top of Fyodor* Fyodor: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you? Sigma: I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice. ---------------------------------------------------- Nikolai: Why would you do that? Sigma: Because I feel guilty. Fyodor: Guilt is a trick emotion. It’s put there by your parents to stop you from doing things that feel good. ---------------------------------------------------- Nikolai: Any advice before Fyodor and I fight? Sigma: Don’t wet yourself in public. Nikolai: Not the kind of advice I was looking for! ---------------------------------------------------- Nikolai & Fyodor: Surprise! We're having a baby! Sigma: What?! Nikolai & Fyodor: *pull out adoption papers* It's you! ---------------------------------------------------- Sigma: And now for a gay update with Nikolai and Fyodor. Nikolai: Getting gayer. Sigma: Thank you, Nikolai. ---------------------------------------------------- Nikolai: When Fyodor was born, the gods said, "They're too perfect for this world." Sigma: Please. When they were born, the devil said, "Oh, competition."

Soukoku Incorrect Quotes🤡

Chuuya, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume? Dazai: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle* Dazai: Dazai: It's perfume. ---------------------------------------------------- Dazai: This date is boring! Chuuya: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store. Dazai: Then why did you invite me? Chuuya: I didn't, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Chuuya I'll do whatever I want!" ---------------------------------------------------- Dazai: The greatest trick the devil ever played was getting me banned from a all you can eat pizza buffet. Chuuya: Why’d you get banned? Dazai: Touched the rat. Chuuya: … What rat? Dazai: Fyodor Dostoevsky. ---------------------------------------------------- Chuuya: Dazai... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor? Dazai: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned. Chuuya: Chuuya: I wrote sanitize, Dazai. ---------------------------------------------------- Dazai: Ah, Hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this. Chuuya: Maybe we would, if you would STOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE!!! ---------------------------------------------------- Chuuya: *Gives a bouquet to Dazai* Dazai: You know I'm allergic. Chuuya: That's the point. ---------------------------------------------------- Dazai: Is this mistletoe? Chuuya: Uh, no, no, that is basil. Dazai: Too bad cause if it was mistletoe I was gonna kiss you. Chuuya: Yeah, no, it’s still basil. ----------------------------------------------------

I'm alive -TheSwordThatStabbedJouno

an incorrect b-day quote for the b-day boy ✨Jouno✨

Tachihara: Happy birthday Jouno! Here’s Tecchous gift to you.

Jouno: …Thats a big box.

Tachihara: Yeah.

Jouno: He’s inside it isn’t he.

Tachihara: [sighing] Yeah.

Bungou Stray Dogs as some of my favorite Epithet Erased quotes:

Dazai: Mano a mano! Pistol to pistol! Ugly rat man vs the... grossest face I can make while fighting!

Fyodor: You know, I do have feelings.

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Atsushi: He's trying to lure me into a false sense of security! Well, joke's on him! I've never been secure in my life! And I'm not about to start now!

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Kunikda: I promised I'd work myself to death by the age of 35! Anything less means I wasn't trying hard enough!

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Tachihara: Listen here, Mr. Assassin-

Gin: Miss.

Tachihara: Oh! O-oh my gosh, I am SO sorry.

Gin: It's quite alright! Please, continue with your threat.

Tachihara: Oh, right. Thank you.

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Kyouka: I wish my mom was a ghost. She's just dead.

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Dazai: Aww, c'mon man! Be cool.

Kunikida: Everyone knows the coolest thing to be... is an upright citizen.

Dazai: LAAAAME!

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Akutagawa: (regarding Atsushi passing out) Did he just pass out from the shock? What a weenie. Half of my bones are broken and you don't hear me complaining!...much.

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Kouyou: [The woman steps forward and unsheathes a real ass, goddamn sword and points it at them.]

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Chuuya: How did you manage to crash my car in the TEN MINUTES I was gone?!

Dazai: I don't know, man! It's not my fault!

Chuuya: Dude, you've crashed five cars in the same year? I think you're the common denominator at that point!

Dazai: (whining) THE ROAD WAS WIGGLY!!

Soukoku Incorrect Quotes (1)

Dazai: I'm a reverse necromancer.
Chuuya: Isn't that just killing people?
Dazai: Ah, technicality.

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Dazai: *holding a bottle* Is this whiskey or perfume? 
Chuuya: *chugs entire bottle* 
Chuuya: It’s perfume.

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Chuuya, at Dazai's funeral: I need a moment with him.

Everyone: Of course. *They leave*

Chuuya, leaning over Dazai′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Dazai: Yeah, no shit.

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Chuuya: When I was your age-

Dazai, mocking Chuuya: When I was your height.

Chuuya:

Chuuya: Listen here you little shit-

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Chuuya: I want to kiss you.

Dazai, not paying attention: What?

Chuuya: I said if you die, I wouldn’t miss you.

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Dazai: That was so hot, Chuuya.

Chuuya: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

Dazai: I'm so in love with you.

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Chuuya: Are you ready to commit?

Dazai: Like, a crime or a relationship?

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Chuuya: Hey, you want a tarot reading?

Dazai: Those are Pokemon cards.

Chuuya: You got a magikarp.

Dazai: ...

Chuuya: It means 'fuck you'.

Soukoku Incorrect Quotes (2)

Chuuya: What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?

Dazai: *sighs*

Dazai: I killed a man.

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Dazai: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt?

Chuuya:

Chuuya: Why are you eating dirt?

Dazai: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my question.

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Chuuya: *Answers phone.* Hello?

Dazai: It's Dazai.

Chuuya: What did he do this time?

Dazai: No, it's me, Chuuya. It's actually me.

Chuuya: What did you do this time?

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Dazai: Pros and cons of dating me.

Dazai: Pros. You'll be the cute one.

Dazai: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

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Chuuya: Do you know that we are made out of atoms?

Chuuya: And atoms never touch each other.

Chuuya: So in my defense, boss. I did not punch Dazai.

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Chuuya: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

Dazai: Killed without hesitation.

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Dazai, admiring a sleeping Chuuya: You’re so cute.

Chuuya, sleepily: I could beat your ass.

Dazai, lovingly: I know.

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Dazai: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?

Chuuya: What?

Dazai: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.

Chuuya: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?

Tachizaki Incorrect Quotes

they’re so underrated but i love them

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Tanizaki: Is something burning?

Tachihara, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.

Tanizaki: Tachihara, the toaster is literally on fire.

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Tachihara: I'm gonna need a human skull but you can't ask why.

Tanizaki: Only if you also don't ask why.

Tanizaki: *pulls four pristine human skulls out of his bag*

Tachihara: ...

Tachihara, grabbing a skull: This one will do.

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Tachihara: *Kicks the door open, looking panicked*

Tanizaki: What did you do?!

Tachihara: NOBODY DIED!

Tanizaki: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

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Tachihara: Ah, Hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.

Tanizaki: Maybe we would, if you would sTOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE!!!

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Tachihara: What the fuck.

Tachihara: ESPN is showing 2003 national jump rope championship.

Tachihara: Who the hell watches jump rope competiti- ooh bouncy.

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Tanizaki: How the hell are you still alive?

Tachihara: Honestly, I’m just as confused as you are.

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Tanizaki: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it.

Tachihara: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out.

Tanizaki: Th-that's not how that works-

Soukoku Incorrect Quotes (3)

Chuuya: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?

Dazai: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Chuuya:

Dazai: I don’t know how you keep forgetting this.

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Dazai: Be careful about succumbing to these sorts of destructive... urges. Addiction can be a powerful thing.

Chuuya: So am I. Bow down before your new supreme overlord, bitches.

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Chuuya: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like ‘look at this fucking flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.’

Dazai: Wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.

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Chuuya: Dazai! For the love of god, please turn down that music. I have a hangover.

Dazai: *blasting the mii theme at full volume* That sounds like a you problem, not a mii problem.

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Chuuya: I typed "traitor" into my GPS and guess what? I'm in your driveway.

Dazai:

Chuuya: Vroom vroom, come out already.

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Chuuya: I can’t tell if you’re a genius or just incredibly arrogant.

Dazai: Well, on a good day, I’m both.

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Chuuya: Where did you get that tomato soup?

Dazai: It’s actually a bowl of ketchup I just microwaved.

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Dazai: I've connected the two dots.

Chuuya: You didn't connect shit.

Dazai: I've connected them.

Manga spoilers? Kind of.

Fukuzawa: My oldest and only friend betrayed me...

Mori: Am I a joke to you?

Fukuzawa: *looks towards Mori, uninterested* Yes.

Mori: *shrugs* Fair.

Natsume: *to Fukuzawa and Mori* Da-- I mean, become partners.

Mori: *to Dazai and Chuuya* Date-- I mean, polish each other like the diamonds you are.

Dazai: *to Atsushi and Akutagawa* Date.

Atsushi&Akutagawa: DAZAI-SAN?!

I want to say I'm sorry for this but... I'm not.

Dazai: Chuuya, I'm bored. Entertain me.

Chuuya: No.

Dazai: A good dog, obeys it's master.

Chuuya: I'm not your dog!

Dazai: That collar on your neck says otherwise.

Chuuya: It's a fashion choice!!

Dazai: Kukikida.

Kunikida: ...

Dazai: Ku-ni-ki-da.

Kunikida: What, Dazai.

Dazai: I'm bored, entertain me.

Kunikida: If I choked you, would you be entertained?

Dazai: Why yes!

I needed to do a Dazai&Kunikida one, it's... it's just too good to pass up on. Dazai annoying his partners, best thing ever, fight me.