Domestic Abuse - Tumblr Posts
Oopsie.
You know when you know something is a bad idea, but you do it anyways?
Have any of you figured out how to curb that yet?
I don't know why, but I googled his name.
He got into an accident on his bike in April and has a GoFundMe set up by his girlfriend. He was in the hospital for 10 weeks.
There's some feels here, but not what I was expecting.
Oopsie.
You know when you know something is a bad idea, but you do it anyways?
Have any of you figured out how to curb that yet?
Over a year ago, he got into an accident on his motorcycle and was in the hospital for more than two months. I found out by googling his name. Yes, I still do that occasionally, maybe once a year; I can't explain why succinctly.
When I first saw the GoFundMe, I nearly donated. I could see that it was set up by a 3rd party, so I could donate anonymously with strict instructions that my identity was not to be revealed under any circumstances.
However, I waited. I credit healing and therapy for this. I asked myself a few questions:
Knowing him like you do:
Do you think he appreciates the donations he's received so far?
Do you think he's saying nice things about the people who donated lower amounts?
Do you think he's being appreciative to the girlfriend he has that facilitated this and is undoubtedly taking care of him right now?
Do you think this kind of experience would change him for the better? Or would he use it as an excuse and motivation to be worse?
Do you think he would appreciate any amount from you?
Do you feel you financially owe him anything ever again?
Does he actually need this money?
Each question had the same answer. So I put my credit card away.
I've been on a Harringrove fic spree lately so;
Billy Hargrove exists without Max Mayfield and Billy Hargrove deserves to exist without Max Mayfield.
Billy deserves to live, to recover, to heal without it being tied to Max. Billy deserves to discover who he is outside of a victim, outside of Neil Hargrove's shadow and abuse, outside of the violence and fear and anger without it being tied to Max.
Billy has value that is not solely deadbolted to being Max's brother. To protecting Max. To doting on her in a way that, in some of your fics and posts, borders on unhealthy, obsessive, and everything Billy should be moving in the opposite direction of.
'Billy redeems himself by being Max's brother' is a trope I am sick to the back teeth of coming across in fanfiction, especially when its just thinly veiled character bashing designed to continuously put Billy down while elevating Max.
Victims do not have to throw themselves into benefitting someone else in order to be deserving of healing, closure, growth and recovery. Victims do not have to 'redeem' themselves by becoming someone else's guard dog. A guard dog that, frankly, Max doesn't actually need.
Billy was already the barrier between her and Neil, anyway. Billy already spent years of his life being the shield between her and Neil. His abuse was, on some level, tied to Max. He deserves to be set free of that for his recovery.
I am reblogging this again, because it seems we are having two different conversations when I only wanted to address the question you asked: “Though for real, for real, what do y'all want at this point? What part of Endeavor's life isn't a punishment right now?”
I did not in any way intent to counter your argument about the pro hero’s occupation with capturing the escapees right now, I stated myself, that it is a top priority right now. I absolutely agree with you on that notion that the immediate safety of the civilians by re-capturing the escapees, especially people like Muscular or Moonfish should be top priority right now.
My comment was meant as an mere analysis of the current opinions in th fandom, an observation if you will, and so is the following:
When I read your original post it seemed that you genuinely did not understand the issue people still have with Endevour at the moment and I simply wanted to answer that, not to counter your argument, in fact I agree with it.
“YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT LEGAL REPERCUSSIONS WILL COME FROM THIS.”
Is what you said. And it’s not wrong, but neither do you if there are any legal repercussions coming from this at all, which is why I answered your question of what people still want right now. I based my answer on two things:
1. The answer I gave explains “what part of aren’t a punishment right now” from the current narrative that people take issue that Enji right now does not have any legal repercussions and that is something that upsets people, hence my original repost explaining this.
2.The narrative of the manga during the press conference in chapter 306:
We have an observing narration for this chapter, which allows as to see it unfold without any personal objection from either Dabi or Endevour. And it shows us that Endevour still keeps his position of being the top hero with no currently addressed legal persecution after he confessed the abuse of his family and Dabi’s reaction to it is simply: “I didn’t go far enough”.
So from Dabi’s perspective he sees that nothing has changed on both ends of the issues addressed by him which are a) Endevour the pro hero gets away with it and b) it mirrors young Toya as a child that just wanted not to be ignored, which means through Dabi’s eyes that Enji the father did not change. (Here’s a link to a summary from Dabi’s perspective about the watch me language of Endevour and him, to make it clearer.)
None of my argument was mean to counter your stand on priorities, in fact I support it, is was merely meant as an explanation on what still upsets people right now.
“Also, I don't know how Japan deals w domestic violence legally.”
Well I, to some degree do and since bnha seems to have a legal system close to current Japan’s legal system we can assume that when it comes to abuse laws it is similar.
I can’t find anything (in english) on the punishment for the abuse of the spouse, but there is the “Act on the precention of spouse violence and the protection of the victim.”
The majority of victims of spouse abuse in japan are women and both physical and psychological abuse count, no separation in law for those two (and when I refer to abuse in this threat, I obviously mean both when it comes to the Todoroki family).
I want to highlight some parts of this for the sake of it:
“(2) Physicians or other medical personnel who detect, during the course of their duties, a person whom they consider to have suffered from injuries or medical conditions resulting from spousal violence may notify the fact to a Spousal Violence Counseling and Support Center or a police officer. In such cases, they shall endeavor to respect the intentions of the person in question.”
Meaning in this situation: Rei was hospitalized and not one medical personnel treating her either noticed something, did not give the information to the authorities or the authorities did not investigate.
And since Rei had a mental breakdown no-one came to investigate properly if her children were in danger either, which is very concerning since Shoto had boiling water poured onto his face.
I emphasize on the properly here, because we do not know if there was any investigation at all or if they for whatever reason (e.g. Endevour pro hero) just believed right away what was being told by others of the household (3 minor abuse victims under the age of 12 and their abuser).
Of course there could be the assumption that Rei did not say anything about Enji’s abuse, that is very likely, but then again they should have checked her children.
So from a legal perspective something went very wrong here.
On the Child Protection Law and Policy we get a better picture of the legal matters and I am discussing the points as they are addressed in the legal document, so in advance I am sorry there are going to be some callbacks to already discussed parts.
“The Child Welfare Act addresses matters of child welfare, including child abuse, in Japan. The Child Welfare Act states that all children must be properly nurtured, be afforded a guaranteed quality of life, be loved, be protected, have healthy growth and development of the mind and body, and be able to be independent.
Municipalities must properly provide support in immediate communities, as the basic unit of the local government.
Prefectures must give necessary advice and appropriate assistance to municipalities and properly perform tasks that require specialized knowledge and techniques, and broad responses.
The national government must take all necessary measures, such as the formulation of policies that ensure the setting up of structures where children can be provided with proper care, provision of advice to municipalities and prefectures, and provision of information”
Is the base of it, but again I want to highlight some parts that are crucial to the Todoroki family:
“The Act states that “no person shall abuse a child,” and particularly obligates teachers, officials and staff of schools, child welfare institutions and hospitals, medical practitioners, attorneys, and other persons involved in child welfare in the course of their duties to endeavor to detect child abuse at an early stage”
As with Rei there were seemly no reports or at least no reports that ended with the children being brought to safety, even though Toya showed clear signs of child abuse as not spending time with friends, aggression, anger, rebellious or defiant behavior and self-harm, desperate seek of affection and attention, poor growth, lack of appropriate attention for medical attention. We don’t know if Fuyumi or Natuso showed any signs, but Shoto did (hostility and very visibly the scar) and typical signs in abusive parents shows by Enji that should be seen by teachers include harsh physical discipline and demand of inappropriate level of academic performance.
And again there were no consequences for Endevour for this, since he kept custody of all of his children and kept abusing them.
“ Materially fail to perform the duty of custody as a custodian, for example,
a. […] b. Abandon and neglect the child for a long period of time in a manner that may interfere with normal development of the child mentally or physically, and c. […]
Use significantly violent language or take an extreme attitude of rejection against the child, use physical and/or verbal violence upon one’s spouse or partner at home where the child is living, or otherwise speak or behave in a manner that would be significantly traumatic to the child.
Those are all accounts that Enji violated as a father.
[insert pctures of Enji abusing his children by neglect, violent language, hitting Rei]
“An abused child is also regarded as an aid-requiring child. A person who discovers an aid-requiring child must give notification, directly or through a commissioned child welfare volunteer, to the municipal government, a welfare office, or a child guidance center established by the prefectural government.”
“The welfare office or the child guidance center that received the notification must check the situation of the child promptly, if necessary.”
Again either everyone kept their eyes shut at the many signs of child abuse on at least both Toya and Shoto, or authorities decided to not (properly) investigate. As with Rei the physical evidence on Toya might have been hidden by Toya himself (changing in toilets for sports, making sure he only has burning where it can be hidden), but the psychological signs were still there.
“Under the Child Welfare Act, in cases where the guardian’s exercise of custody extremely harms the welfare of the child, such as in cases of physical or mental abuse, or extreme neglect cases, the governor may entrust the child to residential care by obtaining permission from a family court against the parent or guardian’s wishes. If necessary for obtaining permission, the governor may send a child welfare officer to the residence of the child to conduct an investigation.”
So that didn’t happen or it led nowhere since he so far still has custody over Shoto.
There is also the higher punishable:
“D. Child Abuse Subject to Criminal Sanction”
“Keeping a child under one’s control with the intent of causing the child to commit an act that has a mentally and physically harmful impact on the child.”
Aka training your child to become stronger than All Might in the cases of both Toya and Dabi.
“A person who commits the first act above is punishable by imprisonment for not more than ten years and/or a fine of not more than 3,000,000 yen (approximately US$27,000).[37] A person who commits any of the other listed acts is punishable by imprisonment for not more than three years and/or a fine of not more than 1,000,000 yen (approximately US$9,000)”
Is the legal punishment for what in current Japanese law Endevour could face.
“Under the Act, a person who has detected a child who appears to have suffered child abuse must promptly give notification, directly or through a commissioned child welfare volunteer, to the municipality, welfare office, or child guidance center. This notification has the same effect as the notification of an aid-requiring child under the Child Welfare Act.”
Emphasis on the past tense here: Dabi made his child abuse public, Endevour even confessed it so legally the ccwv should be immediately informed and then take measures to secure the safety of any children of the abuser, aka notable Shoto who is a minor.
“the mayor of the municipality or the director of the welfare office must “take measures to confirm the safety of the relevant child,”
“C. Ministry of Education
The Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology (MEXT) asks teachers to pay attentions to signs of child abuse and detect it early. The Ministry also requests that schools create a plan of response to child abuse when child abuse against one of their students is found and to collaborate with welfare and health organizations and the police on a regular basis.”
As previously stated this obviously did not happen.
Which leads me to your last point:
“His family has things under control.”
First I want to point out the effects of child abuse and neglect for adult survivors:
“the age and developmental stage at which maltreatment occurred: some evidence suggests that the younger the child was at the time of the onset of the maltreatment, the more likely they are to experience problems later in life”
All of the Todoroki children have been subjected from abuse since they were very little (Fuyumi the least, Toya the most].
“the severity of maltreatment: the greater the severity of abuse or neglect, the higher the likelihood of negative outcomes”
“the victim/survivor's perceptions of the abuse: worse outcomes are likely if there is the victim/survivor experiences feelings of self-blame, shame or stigmatisation”
I mentioned this in my ealier post, but I am goint to re-link the lasting psycholocal issue of Enji shift-blaming.
“whether the abuse or neglect was detected and action taken to assure the safety of the child (e.g., child protection intervention)”
Again, that did in Toya, Fuyumi and Natuso’s case not happen until they were adults, Shoto might be debatable.
“positive or protective factors that may have mitigated the effects of maltreatment (e.g., family support, perpetrator readiness for change) and whether victims/survivors received therapeutic services to assist them in recovery”
See Deku helping Shoto by supporting him and working through his trauma, even though Deku is obviously not a therapist of any kind.
“Persisting mental health problems are a common consequence of child abuse and neglect in adults. Mental health problems associated with past histories of child abuse and neglect include” (I’ll only list those who obviously apply to the Todoroki family)
Suicidal behavior, aggression, violence and criminal behaviors.
Sure sounds like Dabi who obviously isn’t fine, but I know that this isn’t what you meant with your post, that is what part 2 is about:
People don’t realize they were being abused as kids very often.
Unlike Dabi, the rest of the Todoroki siblings show no sign of realizing that they were being abused, which is very common among abuse vitims.
Reasons for that, that involve the Todoroki family could be the following:
“We were well-off, so everyone made sure to tell me how grateful I should be. I assumed the emptiness in me was my fault. After all, I should be grateful, so it couldn’t have been my parents, right?”
Obviously through Endevour they have a lot of money, which is how he got married (that marriage is a whole other discussion that I won’t get into here) but having you monetary needs met through getting fed, educated and housing can lead to people not seeing they are being abused through neglect (Fuyumi and Natuso).
“It wasn’t all bad. The abuse, physical and emotional, was awful, but I still loved my dad and family and they still loved me as sick and weird as that sounds.” Goes hand in hand with “You loved your abuser”
This is very telling of young Toya just wanting to spend time with his father, who he loved, but Enji prioritizing his hero work. And the siblings all still loving their mother even though she abused them as well (she abused them because she was abused as well, but that doesn’t make the abuse go away), specifically Natuso was neglected by her and Shoto obviously physically injured.
“My abuse wasn’t physical. I thought for a long time that physical abuse was the only kind of abuse, and since I wasn’t being beaten, it couldn’t have been that bad. Other people had it worse“
This is pretty much Natuso and Fuyumi. They were completely neglected by their father, Natuso later by their mother as well and unlike their brothers they weren’t physically abused by Endevour either, so they don’t seem to realize that they were abused.
“There was no comparison to know that our ‘normal’ was extremely unhealthy and unsafe.”
Endevour had a maid taken care of the children at home and while seemed to have normal school, Japan is a country where things are kept very private , so home life is probably not very discussed even amongst children.
[apologizing]
So a common thing is that abusers do apologize but don’t change their behavior, which isn’t exactly what happen here obviously. Enji apologized and promised to do better, but while he does change and does better with his children, there is a way in which he didn’t change at all and that is the fact that it is about him. It isn’t about his children, it is about Enji, he decided to be a better father, he decided to pay up for his abuse and while I don’t think that he’s doing an awful job, he is clearly still not seeing that issue about himself. (see projection)
“It made you feel special to be “so close” to your abuser.”
This is just early on Toya, who wanted to spend time with his father, who was overtraining him, for his own sake.
“I was always told parents had a right to discipline their kids”
Clearly the way Endevour “disciplined” his children for not being strong enough quirk based was abuse but if you are constantly by said abuser told that it is your own fault (see projection) [LINK] you will most likely think that is is their right and it has to be your fault for being a failure, which is how Dabi views himself.
And most importantly:
“You couldn’t process it as a child.”
Shoto, Natuso and Fuyumi are all too involved into it and without proper therapeutic care to realize the abuse they suffered completely, especially Fuyumi and Natuso, as I pointed out don’t seem to see it, since they were “only” neglected. And Shoto’s abuse stopped when he was only 15, and he obviously didn’t have enough of a break from the plot to reflect on Enji’s treatment of him or get a therapist.
All of that of course doesn’t negate your point that the lives of the civilians are at stake here and that they should be prioritized over a) legal procedures against Endevour b) change of custody for Shoto (since Endevour is currently not a direct threat to his health anymore) and building a new society (not possible right now anyways).
And of course we haven’t seen any Todoroki since 306 (current stand 309), so we don’t know what is off-screen happening and again I only wanted to answer your question of: “Though for real, for real, what do y'all want at this point? What part of Endeavor's life isn't a punishment right now?” And analyze the issue people have with Endevour right now, not in any way counter your point about priorities. Hence my doctor allegory (and why I didn’t bring Hakws/Twice in this discussion) about more pressing things at the moment.
I want to add one thing though: it does seem a bit off that Hawks and Endevour who were clearly longer hospitalized were not shown for any proceedings after the Dabi video which shows Hawks killing Twice by stabbing him into the back and Dabi mentioning his abuse. While the hero commission is not functioning there should be other structures taking care of this. But this might be just the first time this issue came up and due to the lasting chaos there were no other structures in charge, which again would be an overlaying societal issue.
If I did not convey my stance properly I am sorry, I did in no way mean to counter your argument of “Endeavor and every other hero is needed to fix the horrors your faves have done to the country.” In the sense that it wasn’t at core right, even if I would phrase things differently than how you put it.
I think I told you enough times by now, that I support your argument of: save Japan first (and with that I mean civilian lives, not social structures that are obviously faulty), take care of other things later. I only wanted to clarify the issue people still have with Endevour, nothing more.
Villain Stans: "Why won't the heroes make Endeavor PAY FOR WHAT HE'S DONE AND STOP HELPING HIM????"
Well maybe if the people you stan would stop murdering people and destroying Japan they could turn their attention to that, but right now, Endeavor and every other hero is needed to fix the horrors your faves have done to the country. ... Though for real, for real, what do y'all want at this point? What part of Endeavor's life isn't a punishment right now? Do you just want the heroes to say "Yeah! You're right, Dabi!" And start tearing shit up too? Like???
He wouldn’t let me live like this…
Yes, please boycott this film! E.L. James, the writer of these horrifying, abuse glorifying books was very much involved in the making of the movie adaptation, so you can be sure it'll be just as awful. If you do decide to go see it, do consider donating to your local women's shelter for the sake of karmic balance.
50 Shades of Attempting to Pass Abuse Off as Romance
50 Shades of Grey is not a romance, it’s a horror story. Please consider spending the money somewhere else, like donating it to a women’s shelter or rape crisis center in your area. Here are plenty of good reasons to do just that, or at least to not go see it. Do you really want to support this movie that glorifies abuse, alcoholism, anorexia etc.?
Same. This is an excellent (but terrifying) list.
I keep seeing 50 shades hype and it makes me angry so I read things like this. You’re probably one in the same.
‘Abuser’ Johnny Depp: “There can be no more physical violence. I can’t just stand there and take the punches.”
‘Victim’ Amber Heard: “I can’t promise you I won’t get physical again. God, I just get so mad sometimes I fucking lose it.”
Amber on the stand: “I tried so hard for so long to placate him or walk away whenever he got angry so things wouldn’t escalate, but it didn’t matter what I did, NOTHING worked and NOTHING would stop him from hitting me 🥺🥺🥺” *wipes non existent tear from face*
Amber on tape: “OMG JOHNNY STOP PLS DON’T GO IT CAUSES ME SO MUCH STRESS WHEN YOU LEAVE YOU DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH WORSE YOU’RE MAKING THIS FOR ME YOU’RE SO FUCKING MEAN YOU’RE A BULLY YOU’RE KILLING ME I’M GONNA HAVE A FUCKING HEART ATTACK WHY CANT WE JUST FIGHT LIKE A NORMAL COUPLE WITHOUT YOU SPLITTING ON ME EVERY TIME?!?!?” *hyperventilates in desperation*
Audio Transcript:
JD: I'm really, really really sick of this argument.
AH: Stop, I'm sorry
JD: Ok, so, let me go ? And you go, and I'll speak to you in a couple of hours okay ?
JD: Okay ?
AH: Stop.
JD: Why are you saying stop ?? May I go ???
AH: Stop! Please! It causes me so much stress when you leave, when you walk away from me with that, it's like you're- you don't understand how much worse you're making this!
JD: I can't believe this
AH: Please you're making it worse for me!
JD: Okay, I'm sorry for you
AH: Please I'm only trying to tell you, so that you know, you're causing me immense stress right now when you walk away like that. There's no reason to be mad, i-
JD: Even say goodbye ????? I haven't walked away, you're not saying goodbye, you won't let me fucking leave. LET me leave.
AH: oh my god... stOP PUSHING ME, STOP PUSHING ME IN THE CORNER AND THEN POKING ME WITH A STICK AND THEN SAY WHY USING THE WORDS YOU WANT ME TO SAY.
STOP POKING ME. STOP PRESSING ME. STOP THROWING ME AGAINST THE WALL AND GOING "WHAT YOU DON'T LIKE THAT WALL ? YOU DON'T LIKE THE FUCKING WALL ?" STOP PUSHING ME.
JD: Amber, I'm not pushing you. I'm not pressing you. I said, I need space. I don't want this conversation anymore right now, I need space. And I will take my space, whether you like it or not I will take it. And you will take your space. But if you keep, holding this-
AH: I'm not doing anything to you.
JD: And continuing, with a rhetoric-
AH: I'm not continuing, I'm begging you to stop
JD: I don't- Okay stop.
AH: Just-
JD: I'm stopping, I'm stopping, I'm stopping. Now I have to go, okay ? So we will speak to each other in a couple, of hours. Okay ? I hope you have some kind of a revelation, that makes you feel better. You know, I hope I do too but we will just see, when I get home and we talk or we won't talk or we, you know, finish this or we won't finish it.
JD: But this is not love, this isn't happiness
AH: I just beg you to stop PLEASE
JD: This isn't- This is-
AH: PLEEEASE STOOOP JOHNNYYY please you cause me so much stress, I'M GONNA DIE! THIS IT. IM GONNA FUCKING DIE YOU'RE CAUSING ME SO MUCH STRESS PLEASE STOP
AH: PLEAASE I- I FEEL LIKE I HAVE A HEART ATTACK ALMOST EVERY DAY PLEASE STOP!!! PLEASE STOP DOING IT!
JD: Then what are you doing- why ?
AH: PLEASE STOP DOING IT PLEASE YOU'RE SO FUCKING MEAN, YOU'RE A FUCKING BULLY STOOOP.. PLEAAASE STOP I'VE BEEN BEGGING YOU [claps hands] TO HAVE A FIGHT
AH: I JUST SAID CAN WE PLEASE HAVE A NORMAL ARGUMENT, JUST- EVEN A NORMAL CONVERSATION, LIKE A NORMAL ARGUMENT FOR THE LAST HOUR I'VE BEEN BEGGING YOU TO JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT, LET'S JUST- GO ON WITH OUR NIGHT, I WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO COME IN WITH YOU, WE WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO LET IT GO IN A FEW MINUTES, IT WOULD HAVE BEEN FINE! IT WOULD JUST TO LOVE OURSELVES AT FUCKING NORMAL ARGUMENTS
AH: PLEEEASEEE YOU'RE!!! KILLING ME WITH THIS!!!! YOU'RE KILLING ME!! YOU'RE FFFFF- FUCKING KILLING ME!!!! FUCK!
JD: Shawn! Could you, uh, [talks back to Amber] please, I want you to just go, I want you to take your medicine or whatever, I'm sorry that I've upset you
AH: I think- Thank you Shawn, i'm ready to gooo, thank you so much!
please stop defending her and start worrying about the fact that she is still the same exact person in complete denial, projecting, manipulating and gaslighting and that she is free to do it to other people in the future since she's not facing any jail time in this trial and is not forced to receive any of the obvious psychological and psychiatric help that she so deeply needs. She is a threat to other individuals. Also note how she's sitting in court trying so hard to dissociate herself from her own voice on tape while Johnny is on the other side of the room reviving the whole thing.
A recreation of a 2deep4u comic
Painstakingly drawn my me.
As in it was painful
" Once there was a flood in the forest. A frog was resting on the river bank. A scorpion stuck in the floods requested the Frog, "Please help me cross the river!" Thee frog asked, "What if you sting me?" The Scorpion replied, "Silly, if I sting you then we will both drown. Why would I kill myself? The Frog believed the Scorpion and let him hop on his back. They began to cross the river but as soon as they reached the middle of the river, the Scorpion stung the frog. The Frog asked, "Why did you do that?" The Scorpion said, "I am a Scorpion, stinging is what I do. It is in my nature." Some men are scorpions, dear. They never change, Badru. "
-Darlings, dir Jasmeet K. Reen (2022)
there is an on-going femicide in quebec, canada
and it’s not received the proper attention it deserves in the Canadian news, so I thought it would be good to make a post for ppl who aren’t Canadian as well to be informed and help the victims’ families, organisations and women’s shelters.
femicide is defined as the murder of women based primarily or solely on their gender. in almost all cases of femicide, the killer is a man close to the victim, most likely a romantic partner or family member. so far in 2021, there have been 8 murders in the Quebec area. the majority of these victims are Black and Indigenous women. all of them are victims of domestic abuse.
MARLY EDOUARD was a 32 year old Haitian musician, radio host and producer. on february 19th, she called 911 to report that she was receiving multiple violent death threats and met with police officers. less than 48 hours later, she was found murdered in front of her building. say her name.
REBEKAH HARRY was a 29 year old black woman and mother of one young boy under the age of 12. she was murdered by her boyfriend, Brandon McIntyre. in 2013, McIntyre was found guilty of domestic abuse towards his ex-wife. he beat Rebekah into a coma, and she died three days later on march 23rd. say her name.
KATALUK PANINGAYAK-NALUIYUK was a 43 year old Indigenous woman, mother of six and grandmother of two. she was murdered by her partner, Peter Ainalik, who took his own life afterwards. her sister, who has herself been in an abusive relationship for 19 years, confirmed that Kataluk’s been a victim of domestic abuse by Ainalik as well for many years.
NANCY ROY was a 44 year old woman. she was murdered on by her 53 year old ex-boyfriend, Jean-Yves Lajoie. Nancy’s mother told news and police that Nancy had been struggling for weeks to break up with Lajoie, who was possessive as well as physically and emotionally abusive. just days after she left him, Nancy was stabbed to death in her home by Lajoie.
NADÈGE JOLICOEUR was a 40 year old black woman and mother of five children. she was stabbed to death by her boyfriend, Enock Fenelon, in his taxi before he took his own life on march 19th. her family confirmed Nadège was a victim of domestic abuse which lead to her murder at the hands of Fenelon. say her name.
MYRIAM DALLAIRE (28) and her mother SYLVIE BISSON (60) were murdered on march 1st in their home by Myriam’s ex-boyfriend Benjamin Soudin. Myriam had left soudin after she accused him of domestic abuse.
ELISAPEE ANGMA was a 44 year old indigenous woman from Kuujjuaq and mother of four children. she was murdered by Thomassie Cain, her ex-partner, who had just been released from prison after abusing her then attacking her once more after she filed a restraining order against him.
Across Canada, 54% of the victim services surveyed reported an increase in the number of victims they served during the pandemic. Calls for domestic disturbances were also up 12% during the first few months of the pandemic. Keep in mind that the majority of victims of domestic abuse never call the police or speak up about their experiences in fear of their abusers.
I haven’t been able to find any gofundmes and donation links set up by the families of the victims. however, here are women’s shelters in Quebec and in Canada you can donate to and resources for women in Canada.
https://href.li/?https://www.chezdoris.org/en/
Aaaaaand this is one of many reasons why Akito will never deserve her bullshit happy ending. Fuck her, and fuck this manga for letting the abusive bitch get away with everything Scot-free
Just talked to another girl who fled an abusive partner.
Hers was even worse than mine. Jeez.
CW: Domestic/Parental Ab*se
My abusive mother threatened to kill my beloved familiar, my kitty Max. So I walked away.
Had a night out, and my bf got me a motel so we could hook up. He had to go home this morning to his kids ofc, so I got an Uber home.
Changed and left again, and walked down to my favorite coffee shop/skate park hangout to just vibe.
dont read if not feeling well
no one relay talks about how helpless it feels to be in a culture that justifies and normalises child abuse. i cant talk to a "a trusted adult" they hit thier own kid. i cant call "cps" we dont have one, thier is child line but they wont help not realy. its so normal to hit children that i dont know a single kid that hasnt been hit. hiting children is soo normal its in our school sylabus, no realy, there is a eng ch in 9 th grade where they justify hiting children and if children feel bad or mad or anything when they get hit they are the bad guys cuz parents are oh so tired. that chapter desrvrs its own rant. its so normalised that when i shared with my friends some memories , i found that aprently my case is pheraps out of the normal amount of abuse . which is a wild line to say cuz abuse is not ok either way. its not untill 2007?8?9?6? did hiting children in schools became a crime. which still hapens, my second grade teacher used to hit us soo much i still feel traumatied to a point i cant trust treachers anymore . and if teachers arent hiting you they would let you know how much they want to beat you and how much they wished it was legal and how much you desrve to be hit and i am like bro i am 7 ??
by the way its legal for parents to hit thier children at home,so yeah goverment thanks for nothing!
also i am from a uraban city in my country next to my country's capital, so things are way worse in rural areas .
Yes!!
stop making "jokes" about male, female, and queer victims who were abused my cishet men, women, and queer people.
Men can be verbally, emotionally, physically, and sexually abused by not only men but women as well. The same goes for women abused by women and queer people. Traits like gender may play a role in the reasoning and forms of abuse and how victims express trauma, but it's not a main factor of who takes the role of victim and or abuser.
The continuous notion of men are the only problems when it comes to abuse is so wrong, because there are other factors to why people act out abusive behavior other than the lazy argument of "men biologically love sex" and or "men bad". And some may reject that but I've seen posts of men, women, and queer people having their reports of abuse dismissed because it wasn't man. Sometimes if a man sexually abuses a man it's either seen as "desirable if the two are queer" or used as "valid" reasoning for hating "queer people". Instances of abuse like this are often twisted into a false narrative to either laugh at or exploit to fearmonger.
Support victims of abuse and trauma no matter who they are and don't invalidate their feelings just because "they have it better than others". As well as finding help for abusers to possibly reform and learn from the mistakes and take strides to better themselves. Don't be dismissive. And for people who have low empathy or just struggle with comforting others and expressing emotion in general just let the person know you'll be there for them and ask how they feel and what they want to discuss and do moving forward. If the person doesn't want to talk about then that's fine just hangout if they want company and suggest types of therapy they can use or anything that would be more appropriate in the moment.
abusiveness and predation is not unique to men. abusive women (and the abuse of men for that matter) are much, much more common than you think. if your support for abuse survivors only extends to women or people who were abused by men, you don't actually support survivors.
so to all the survivors who aren't women, and the survivors whose abusers weren't men: i believe you, and i see you. you deserve to be safe and supported. you are not alone. your pain and suffering matters just as much as others' does. what happened to you is just as awful, and i'm wishing you so much healing and happiness.
Caffeine-based fetish pic? Unfortunately not - found a copy of this outrageously misogynistic print ad for Chase & Sanborn Coffee via a 'Cape Cod History' facebook page.
Harwich, MA native and wife-beating enthusiast Caleb Chase introduced canned coffee in 1878. And it sucks.
1952: Buy canned coffee and save yourself from a beating.
2016: Buy canned coffee and you deserve a beating. From me.