Disorder - Tumblr Posts
Good night Tumblr
Guys I have non-24 look it up please it's really silly
I love having a sleep disorder so rare that there are like 10 posts on it and no real fix for it because it usually occurs in blind people :D
ABC PLEASE
Use this guide to help you develop emotional resilience and decrease suffering from difficult emotions.
A - Accumulate Positive Emotions:
- Short Term: Be mindful of pleasant events such as listening to music, watching tv, drawing knitting, etc.
-Long Term: Avoid avoiding, identify values, take steps toward goals.
B - Build Mastery:
-Plan on doing something to build a sense of accomplishment.
-Plan for success rather than failure.
-Look for a challenge and gradually increase difficulty over time.
C - Cope Ahead:
-Describe possibly triggering situations.
-Plan coping or problem solving strategies.
-Practice coping effectively.
-Practice relaxation after coping practice.
P - Treat Physical Illness:
-Take care of your body.
-See a doctor when necessary
-Take prescribed medications as directed.
L - List Resources and Barriers:
-List tools and practices that will help with vulnerabilities.
-List issues and situations that will hinder healthy practices.
E - Balanced Eating:
-Don’t eat too much or too little.
-Eat regularly and mindfully throughout the day.
-Stay away from food that makes you feel overly emotional.
A - Avoid Mood-Altering Substances: Stay off drugs and alcohol.
S - Balanced Sleep:
-Try to get 8-9 hours of sleep daily.
-Keep a consistent bedtime and wake time.
E - Regular Exercise:
-Do some sort of exercise daily.
-Aim for 20-30 minutes of physical activity.
-Build flexibility and love your body.
*More DBT guides here*
Do you guys have any disorder? If yes, which one? Also, more than one? Solely for curiosity purpose, I swear
Our mind is a clockwork of chaos endlessly ticking with unpredictable patterns. 💫
I have a problem with guilt.
I am haunted by these specters
One by one
Till all I can see is the need for my damnation.
It is easy for me to get turned around in it.
Perhaps I can force down a couple thoughts
But all it takes is one big self-accusation
Then I am drowning beneath the broken damn.
Everything is my fault.
So my mental anguish tells me.
I am responsible for all the bad
Makes me easy to manipulate.
I gaslight myself for fucks sake
And always need to see the best in people.
Suddenly years are lost
While I'm still wondering
"maybe it really is me?"
Add to this a troubled connection to reality
And all the other psychological insecurities,
I risk reverting to that corner
Holding my head
Rocking violently back and forth.
I don't want to go to those dark places.
I don't see poetry in it like I used to.
I don't want to die
And I do not wish to feel compelled towards it.
My torturers have always been loved ones
Ever since I was a little child.
"I love you!
I'll never hurt you!"
While his hand is wrapped around his child's neck.
Kept repeating
Hurt by love.
"Be this do this don't you love god?
Wicked
Sinner
"How can you even face yourself!"
I always bowed.
Evolved to hide in plane sight.
Subservient
I never did anything of my own volition.
I didn't offer ideas or options
I just recycled what I knew they wanted to hear.
I became perfect
And was perfect
A marvelous reproduction
Of the conscience of the person talking at me.
I regurgitated their own words
"and it was good"
I mimicked their neuroses
"and it was good"
I broke me into a malleable putty
So I could be molded into their image.
I became a shape shifter
And disappeared entirely.
.
I have made a lot of progress.
Hurt the people I cared for most
When I turned out to be hollow.
Worse than hollow
Filled with raging psychic pain
From the life long concealment of my person.
A lie
Who professed to love.
Drew close to the door of my own extinction.
Saw what I had become.
Been fighting to heal
To grow and mature.
Yet somedays I still get low
Even after a stellar day,
Especially after a stellar day,
And begin to question myself
Wondering
"what if I am wrong?"
Guilt for being happy.
Guilt for being free.
Guilt for refusing the old pains
And the ones who caused it most.
I've gotten into a bad habit of not forming opinions of things anymore.
Asking the opinion of someone with a working social disorder is a recipe for disaster. If the two don't agree, it almost always becomes a spirited debate, and that requires a lot of energy. In my case, I usually end up tired and frustrated, ruining the rest of my day. Either that, or I can't formulate my arguments right (because of how-do-I-social disorder), and then I say something completely wrong, which the opposing party latches on to and beats me over the head with.
Even if we agree, the discussion doesn't stop there - no, we discuss why we agree, and the above still applies. At best I come out of it exhausted, at worst we disagree on a minor point and I have to tell the other person to stop for the sake of my sanity. Of course it never stops immediately and by this point I'm so irritated I end up yelling at the other person who clearly is just being nice about the whole thing and we just get angry and all I want to do is STOP--
...okay, deep breath... whew~
So what's the easy answer? Not having opinions, of course. Not even being able to see both sides or anything like that - just not having an opinion whatsoever. And it seems that I've gotten so sick of debate that my brain has chosen this route.
At first glance this seems like it might actually be a good idea... except for the part where my opinions of things are crucial to my understanding of them. If I like something, it has added to my life in some way - I've laughed at it, or learned something new, or grown from it. I like it because of these things. Even things I dislike at least show me what not to do in the future.
When I don't decide whether I like something or not, my brain doesn't register that any of these things have happened. It had no impact; it's become a worthless consumable. I might as well have never done the thing in the first place.
I suppose I should kick this habit early so I can continue to have opinions. Maybe somewhere along the way, I can learn to articulate them better. If I get good enough, I could do blogpost-like exposition on the fly! Maybe. It'll take a while.
...did I just discuss my opinion of opinions?
This is what anxiety looks like
Me: *hanging with a friend*
Friend: Want to go eat somewhere?
Me: I don't have money, I'll eat at home.
Friend: [stronger] Want to go eat somewhere?
Me: Erm... sure!
Anxiety: You don't have money, how will you pay for it?
Brain: It sounds like he's offering to buy it for me, so--
Anxiety: But what if he doesn't?
Brain: are you serious right now
*later, getting in the car*
Friend: [on phone with another friend] Will and I are going to eat somewhere, want to come?
Me: [under breath] if someone buys it for me
Brain: DID YOU JUST SAY THAT OUT LOUD.
Anxiety: See? Even he agrees with me.
Brain: Would you SHUT UP
*at the restaurant*
Friend: [on his phone] I'm looking something up, you go order, I'll catch up in a minute.
Anxiety: But you don't have money, what are you going to do?
Brain: He's going to buy it for me, how many times do I have to--
Anxiety: But he hasn't said that yet.
Me: ...
Brain: OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.
Me: *watches friend to stall for time*
Of course, my friend ended up buying dinner for me, like my rational brain was telling me. But the whole situation SUCKED because my dysfunctional brain was acting stupid.
Sebastian Michaelis with an S/O from Greece who has a slight eating disorder!
- As soon as Sebastian finds out you haven’t really eaten in the last few days he makes it his mission to make sure you start eating properly again!
- He will make sure you don’t overwork yourself and take some time off of work (you’re working as a maid in the Phantomhive household).
- He will get up super early to make you a breakfast (it’s just for you! The breakfast for the Earl can wait!). He will make something so yummy you’ll think you’re in heaven!
- If you tell him that you miss home at some point he will make you food from Greece! The Souflakis he makes are just WOW. 10/10.
- Your breakfast contains a small bowl of different fruits (apples, berries, bananas, oranges, etc.). He also made ham and eggs, a bowl of cereal and a nice cup of steaming hot Tea. It tastes so delicious, Sebastian is basically Demon Gordon Ramsay.
- When it’s time for lunch he will take you to the kitchen. You sit down on the small table they have and Sebastian brings you a tray filled with delicious looking food.
- The first course! Wow! A chicken soup! It is so hot and the chicken meat is so tender!
- The main course! Oh my god, what is that?? It’s a bowl of spaghetti with meatballs! The way the cheese melts on the noodles looks heavenly! (Ngl, I am hungry myself rn.)
- The dessert! Oh boy, you’re so full but that food is bussin’! It’s a chocolate pudding with a piece of chocolate in it!
- Okay after this meal you’re so full. You can’t eat a dinner today, right?
- Well wrong!
- Sebastian has also prepared something for dinner already! This man. He is a man among men. A legend. He didn’t make a three course meal, not because he is lazy! You had a meal like that for lunch and he thinks that too much food is also not good. But he still made something you would like. Definitely. He brings a big plate with salmon, avocado, ham, olives, some caviar, bread, cheese and tomatos.
- After you ate everything he will bring you to bed.
- “Good night my dear. Tomorrow I will wake you with something even more delicious!” He smiles and gives you a forehead kiss before switching off the lights in your room.
- So what did we learn today? Sebastian will not have it if you don’t eat and don’t treat yourself. He will make food for you, doesn’t matter what he will make it for you!
Thank you so much @faioula16 You’re actually my very first request on Tumblr! Congrats! I hope you’ll like that scenario! Feel free to write requests anytime!
I just panic all fucking day long no reason at all, it just PANIC, PANIC!!!!!!! FFFFFFFS
I'm so depressed man
hm yeah the more I think about it the funnier it is that I came out of adhd testing with a diagnosis but not an adhd diagnosis they just looked at all the numbers and said "yeah there's definitely something wrong with your brain" and that's basically all my diagnosis is
I send you my heart with pain. How did you get to this point? I feel like a beggar after I was a graphic designer in the most prestigious companies in the sector and outside it, and now I am sitting in a tent, carrying my phone to communicate with those who have true humanity to help us overcome this disaster. I am Amina Abu Hashem. I am married and have four children. Among them is my little girl, Maryam. She lived through this genocidal war from the first day, and she was only three months old. The situation here is getting worse day by day. I hope you will share my story and help me leave Gaza and protect my children.
Hello Amina,
I hope you and your family will be able to evacuate soon, InshaAllah. May Allah SWT protect you all and make it easy, Ameen ❤️
Amina, her husband and their 4 children, Joud, Habiba, Omar, and baby Maryam need to evacuate Gaza to reach safety and continue the treatment of their eldest daughter who suffers from a gland disorder. Share and donate !!!
20 087$USD out of 100 000$
bipolar disorder isnt 8 or 80 its more like -800 or 800000000000000
Dream (Shiro Takahashi)
TW!/DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT!: Violence, Gore, and mentions of Depression and Disorder‼️
Shiro opened his eyes, blinking with confusion, before bringing his hands up in front of him, getting a closer look while moving his hands.
He was quite confused about how he ended up inside the school bathroom stalls, now that he took a good look at his surroundings.
Creamy walls, orange tiles and stall doors, and two sinks near the main door of the bathroom that's strangely closed since it always stayed open. He feels strange as well, as if he's not in his body or just on the sidelines.
Shiro jerked his head forward as he heard a muffled sound, only to see a familiar girl tied up in a chair with a blue cloth wrapped around her mouth. Muffling her sounds of terror and confusion as she struggled to break free from the ropes. Trying to look around to see what's going on despite her vision's blur from the tears.
Suddenly, the door slammed open, revealing himself, but a bit younger and much more unhinged than him. Shiro (the one on the sidelines) watched the scene in front of him, looking amused as he began to recognize the girl who kept struggling with her restraints. It was his classmate, Gabriela Pineda, the one who kept using him as a slave and insulting him when she got a chance.
'Interesting...' Shiro thought, grinning unconsciously.
The other Shiro closed the door behind him, locking it securely, before he began to walk towards the girl. Getting his head close to her. Eyes were dilated and an eerie smile appeared, then Shiro spoke.
"Yo, Gab. How's your day? Amazing, right? Using me as an errand boy when you have a pair of arms and legs, and insulting me when you get a chance like I'm a dog. Am I just a dog to you? You know, you've been so irritating since day one that I fucking dreamed of burning and stabbing you alive, letting you fucking feel the pain that I felt! And here I am, going to do that inside of this catholic school. Going to enjoy your screams and shrieks, just wanna return your favor."
Shiro grins, hitting his temple repeatedly with his finger before pulling his head away. He grabs a cutter in his pocket that he stole from his adviser's desk, and immediately begins to stab the girl's thigh repeatedly. Twisting and turning the blade while laughing loudly (with Shiro on the sidelines) at the muffled shrieks and screams from the pain.
"Ya know, I just realized how fucked up my life is, from kindergarten to grade school. I wish I had killed the one in my 1st grade for what she did to me but she died from dengue! Congrats to her! You all really fucked me up, giving me depression and a lot of disorder. I can't even separate what's real nor what's not or am I even in the reality or just a set? Ha!''
"If you don't know what you did to me, you accused me of losing your some fucking 20 note and made me pay for it, didn't tell me how much the board is and just told it late, just letting me keep paying you for the board in our project. You even used me as an errand boy to buy the things that you wanted and exploded like a grenade when I didn't get what you wanted. YOU HAVE A PAIR OF ARMS, HANDS, AND LEGS! WHY DON'T YOU USE THEM!? JUST BECAUSE I'M KIND DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN ORDER ME AROUND LIKE I'M A DOG! WHAT? YOU DON'T WANT TO USE YOUR HAND AND LEGS ANYMORE!? BECAUSE I WOULD GLADLY FUCKING CUT THEM!"
Shiro bellowed, now stabbing more furiously at the other's thigh. Spraying a lot of blood that hit his stained face. His other stained hand harshly grabbed the female's throat, clenching it around tightly while he kept stabbing her thigh until her arms. This continued for a while, creating a chaos of screams, shrieks, sobs, and laughs on both males that echoed through the bathroom walls.
After some time, Shiro ceases his ministrations after he gets bored, pulling out the bloody cutter from the female’s arms, which causes some blood gushing out and a painful scream from the girl.
The display was a mess; both of them were covered in blood, but Gabriela’s appearance was much worse: her uniform was stained from the excessive blood that gushes out from her gashes and it shows her bones and raw flesh from how deeply the male stabbed her. The appearance of the girl satisfied the male.
Shiro then throws the bloody cutter away, ignoring the female’s angry yells, wincing, and grunting. Her eyes were narrowed as she glared at the male before they widened in fear when he brought out a can of gasoline and a box of matches.
He eerily smiled, picked a match and lighted it. He happily throws it on the girl’s skirt, smirking as it quickly spreads, making the girl shriek again from terror and pain, struggling restlessly from her restraints.
“My bad…” Shiro sarcastically remarks, smiling before pouring a can of gasoline on the poor girl’s head, emitting more screams and shrieks on the latter as it burns and spreads more into her body.
Shiro sighed in ecstasy, plopping down on the floor, away from the fire. He then lit up another match and threw it straight to the body, continuing his ministrations until the box of matches became empty. Watching with glee as the body encompassed with flames as its screams slowly ceased. The air became pungent with burnt flesh, blood, and ash.
The features of the girl’s face were now invincible as its skin turned black and burnt as it continued being in flame.
Its condition obviously says that it’s dead.
Mission Complete. 1 more to go.
“Next up, Samantha Dela Cruz..” Shiro grinned, laughing from thrill, his face glowing menacingly from the fire.
____________________________
To be continued. Part 2?
Likes and Reblogs are appreciated! <33
TRIGGER WARNING -suicidal thoughts- People think it's just the thought of no meaning in life, that they end it, feeling no colours or pain. But it hurts. These thoughts are burning and chasing me everywhere i go. There is still that one voice pulling me back from the edge of the bridge or laying the knive back down. It's the knowledge of how far my mind/ body would go, that terrifies me the most. I never choosed to become like that, but there are times, when that one thing inside me, cries for the pain to stop. It are those times, i am ending up on the ground of a unknown meadow or stop myself from crying in public, because these voices keep telling me to finally end the pain, that i carry since my past and erase these horrible memories, that keep me awake at night. Everyone keeps telling me that it's going to be better soon. I am sick of taking all those meds, which make me more sick than i was before. It's not the end, yet. I would never know if it got better, when i don't try till the very last. There won't be a finish line, when i stop running and stay at the ground. It's my life and my choices. The past is something to learn of and not to get guided by it. I will get back up and be stronger than before. Fu@# those voices and all the people passing their problems to the other, cause they don't want to handle it. We got this only chance. Only one. Use it. Because some people would really wish to have onther. *this is text is based on my own experience and opinion. Not everyone feels the same way i do. I respect that. No, i don't want to kill myself anymore. Drawing helps me to deal with my disorders and traumatic experiences. Stay safe and if you have suicidal thoughts, then please get help of professionals to talk about them! **my english may have some... Or much errors. I'll blame the memes for that. :D #suicide #depression #disorder #suicidalthoughts #mentalhealth #anxiety #saddrawing #deepthoughts #help #scars #death #trauma #pastlife #childhood #crying #tears #sadart #pain #emotion #feelings #sadness #helpless #nolove #loveyourself #life #lifechoices #lovelife #smile #nevergiveup #fightforlife #artwork #coaldrawing #macabreart #lizzyeatsart
I wouldn’t be yelled at anymore if I was dead
No longer using responses as of June 25th, 2023. However, you’re free to still answer the questions if you want a place to talk/rant about your experiences!
Misophonia Survey - reblogs appreciated!!!
HAI!!! Ok. So. Misophonia, - when you hear certain sounds made by others that [drive you mad], give you a feeling of abnormal disgust, anger, or discomfort. I have that! It really sucks!!!! And I want more people to know about it! For those unfamiliar but wanting to learn, this is a good base article to read.
I'm working on a project based around misophonia for school, and one part of this is a survey - and I'd really appreciate, if you know/believe you have it, if you'd spare some time to fill it out...?
It's completely anonymous :3 There's a place to give a name, but only if you want to. You can use it as a place to vent, You can be as lengthy as you want, or as short as you can possibly manage. However you wish to be!! There is verrry small mention of self harm at the scale-based question, but that's it.
14 questions: 2 for your name/consent, 3 multiple choice questions, 8 open-ended text questions, and 1 bonus one for misokinesia.
For those who followed me for art,, Help me share this and i can get back even faster ;) ;). asjdfgdnf That felt evil sorry! This is a really important topic to me o|-<
If you don't have it yourself, but still reblog it, thank you so so so much!!!